Phases

By Kirk Landers

Published on Apr 18, 2007

Gay

Copyright and Disclaimer: 1. This is a fictional story with fictional characters. 2. No one is to steal this story under any circumstances. 3. This story deals with relationships and not sex, so if you're looking for a story with a lot of sex in it, this isn't the story for you.

Hope you are all still enjoying! Here's part 21 entitled, "Now What?"

'NOW WHAT?'

Leo finished packing the last of his things and was now just waiting for Nick and Kurt to pick him up when Tristan stopped by his room.

"Well, this is it," Leo said, "I'm off today."

"Yeah," Tristan replied, "Is it bad that I kind of wish you were in rehab a little longer?"

"No," Leo replied, "I get it."

"I'm going to miss you Leo," Tristan said giving Leo a hug.

"It's only for a little bit," Leo said. "When you get out we'll be together again."

"I want to thank you," Tristan said.

"For what?" Leo asked.

"For saving me," Tristan replied, "I never would have gotten this far with out you."

"Me neither," Leo said. "You helped me so much. Helped me see the light again."

"Leo, your friends are here to pick you up," one of the counselors said knocking on the door to Leo's room.

"I guess this is it," Tristan said.

"Okay, well you have my cell phone number and my address," Leo said. "Call me when you check out, okay?"

"I will," Tristan said.

"Thanks for the bottle cap," Leo said holding the bottle cap Tristan gave him.

"You're welcome," Tristan replied giving Leo a hug goodbye. "I'll see you soon."

"Definitely," Leo said, the two then slowly kissed one another goodbye. Leo then grabbed his bags and left the room and went outside to where Nick and Kurt were waiting by the car. Before he got inside the car he looked back once more at Tristan and they both gave each other a brave smile as they waved goodbye to each other. He then packed his stuff in the car and left the rehab center.

"We are so proud of you Leo," Nick said as they were driving.

"Yeah, you've grown so much since being there," Kurt said.

"Thanks," Leo said.

"You excited?" Nick asked.

"To tell you the truth I'm nervous," Leo replied. "I'm actually out. There's no counselors to keep an eye on me or anything. It's different."

"You'll be fine," Kurt said confidently. "I know it."

"Thanks," Leo said, "I'll miss Tristan a lot too."

"How did things go with you two?" Kurt asked.

"Well, after I talked to you the other day we kissed," Leo said.

"You did?" Kurt asked excited.

"You and Tristan are starting something up?" Nick asked, completely unaware.

"Yeah," Leo said. "Him and I like each other a lot."

"Where have I been?" Nick asked. "I didn't know any of this."

"Well, a lot has been going on," Kurt pointed out.

"Speaking of which," Leo said, "How did it go with Ryan?"

"It didn't," Kurt replied, "I didn't talk to him."

"I thought you went to Florida?"

"I did, but when I saw him with his daughter he looked so happy that I couldn't interfere with that," Kurt said, "He found a new life and I don't want to complicate it for him."

"Did you confront Reese?" Leo asked.

"Yeah," Kurt replied, "I told him to leave here. I'll find out at work tomorrow if he actually took that advice."

"I'm sorry about all that," Leo said. "I can only imagine what you're going through."

"Yeah, it sucks," Kurt sighed, "But I can't dwell on it. I have to move on."

"Good for you," Leo said, he then turned to Nick, "So what about you? What's going on with you and Luke?"

"We're taking it slow," Nick replied.

"Really?" Leo asked disappointed.

"Leo," Kurt warned.

"I'm just saying that Nick can do so much better," Leo said. "Why go back to him?"

"Leo, I love him," Nick said. "That's all it comes down to for me. I still love him."

"Well, what he did to you was not okay," Leo said, "He's a jerk if you ask me."

"Leo," Kurt said again, "Zip it."

"Leo, did I say anything bad about Jesse when you wanted to get back with him?" Nick asked.

"No, but that was different," Leo said, "Jesse and I didn't break-up because he started seeing someone else."

"Leo, remember how much you didn't like it when Nick was all over protective of you?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah," Leo replied.

"Well then don't do it towards him," Kurt said.

"But you guys don't understand," Leo said.

"What do you mean?" Nick asked curious.

"Nothing," Leo dismissed, not wanting to reveal his secret about Luke and him to the guys, "Whatever, just do what you want, just keep him away from me."

"Leo, if you don't stop I'm going to take you back to rehab," Kurt joked.

"Well it wouldn't be so bad," Leo said, "I'd be with Tristan."

"It's good to see you happy like this again," Nick said. "It's been a long time."

"I know," Leo said, "I finally feel like I'm going to be okay."

"Good," Kurt said, "Lets go out tonight and celebrate.

We'll go out to a nice restaurant."

"How about that new Japanese restaurant that opened up by my place," Nick suggested.

"Sounds perfect," Leo said.

When Nick dropped off Kurt and Leo the two went up to their apartment and helped Leo settle back in.

"Good being home?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah, it's great," Leo replied as he set his bags down in his room.

"Do you want anything?" Kurt asked.

"No, I'm okay," Leo answered.

"How about a something to drink? I can make some lemonade," Kurt suggested.

"Kurt, I'm okay," Leo replied, "You don't have to treat me like glass. I won't break."

"I'm sorry," Kurt said, "I think I'm doing it more for me. I can use the distraction."

"What's wrong Kurt?" Leo asked.

"Just the whole situation with Ryan," Kurt sighed.

"You miss him a lot huh?"

"So much," Kurt said sitting down on the couch, "I just wish he were here."

"Why don't you call him?" Leo asked sitting next to Kurt, "It's not too late."

"It is," Kurt replied, "He's with his daughter now."

"So?" Leo asked.

"You should have seen him with her," Kurt replied, "He was carrying her, she had these beautiful big brown eyes just like Ryan and this big smile on her face as he was giving her a kiss on the cheek. And the look on Ryan's face was just pure joy. I couldn't disrupt that relationship between them now. She finally has a dad and he seems so happy as a father. Everything that's been going on has just been a lot to take you know?"

"I know," Leo said.

"I just wish my life was back to the way it used to be," Kurt sighed, "As boring as that may have been, I just want things to go back to normal."

"They will," Leo encouraged. "Kurt, you are one of the nicest, most caring people I know."

"You liar," Kurt replied with a little laugh.

"No, I'm serious," Leo said. "You are always taking care of people and watching out for people. How many times have you stopped fights between me and Nick? Kurt, you're the best friend everyone wishes they had.

You will find love again, because no one is more deserving of it than you."

"Thanks Leo," Kurt said giving him a hug.

"And I think we're all starting to do a lot better."

"I guess. Are you doing a lot better?"

"I will be," Leo said. "There's just one thing I really need to do now."

"What's that?" Kurt asked.

"Would you mind taking me to see Jesse?"

"Really?"

"Yeah," Leo said, "I need to say bye to him."

"What do you mean, goodbye?" Kurt asked.

"I'm not going to see him any more," Leo replied.

"Really?" Kurt asked surprised. "Are you sure about that?"

"Yeah," Leo replied, "I have to move on and if I continue to go there then I will never be able to."

"I see," Kurt nodded understanding. "When do you want to go?"

"Can we go now?" Leo asked.

"Yeah sure," Kurt replied. The two grabbed their jackets and then headed down to the hospital.

After Nick dropped off Kurt and Leo he went over to Luke's place where the two had made plans to spend some time together to re-connect. The two were sitting out on his balcony that over looked all of the city and talked about the past and their possible future.

"So how's Leo and Kurt doing?" Luke asked.

"They're good," Nick replied. "How's your family?"

"They're great, my sister is pregnant again," Luke said.

"Again?" Nick asked, "This is going to be her fourth kid right?"

"Yeah," Luke replied, "This one is a girl too."

"Wow, four girls, I'm sure Drake is happy about that," Nick quipped.

"You kidding? Drake loves having all girls," Luke said, "He thinks boys will be too much work."

"Well, he may have a point there," Nick said, "Boys turn into men who end up being nothing but trouble."

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Luke laughed.

"I missed your family a lot," Nick said.

"They miss you too," Luke replied, "They were so excited when I told them you and I were trying to work things out again."

"Yeah?" Nick asked.

"Yeah, they want you to come over for dinner as soon as possible," Luke replied.

"That would be fun," Nick said. "I would love to see them."

"Yeah?" Luke asked with a smile.

"Of course," Nick replied.

"I'm glad, I thought you might think it was too soon to see them again," Luke said.

"Well, I'm not really sure about what the rules are when trying to start up a relationship again," Nick said. "Do you think it's too soon?"

"No, I would love it," Luke said. "Thank you. Is it okay if I give you a hug?"

"I think hugs are allowed," Nick smiled as the two hugged one another. Luke closed his eyes remembering how good it felt to be in Nick's arms. Nick also enjoyed holding Luke again, the way he smelled, the sound of his breath against his ear. It was everything he remembered and loved. The two slowly looked at one another and then leaned in and kissed.

"Are kisses allowed?" Luke asked.

"Probably not," Nick replied, but he didn't pull away from their kissing.

"You think we should stop?" Luke asked between kisses.

"Yeah," Nick replied, but kept on kissing.

"You think we should take this into the bedroom?" Luke asked.

"Oh yeah," Nick replied as the two hurried to Luke's room.

At the hospital, Kurt and Leo walked up to Jesse's room.

"You sure you're okay to do this?" Kurt asked, "You want me to go in there with you?"

"No," Leo replied, "I need to do this on my own."

"Okay," Kurt replied, "I'll be right out here if you need me."

"Thanks," Leo said as he went into the room. When he walked in he let out a deep breath when he saw Jesse. Still laying there helpless, tubes all over him, monitor beeping to check his heart rate. But despite all that, he still had that same handsome look, the same slight smile he always seemed to give off even when he was serious. Leo went over and sat next to him and held Jesse's hand.

"Hey you," Leo began. "It's been a while since I last saw you. I don't know if you can hear me right now, but I'm just going to say this and hope somehow you hear what I need to say." Leo took a deep breath before he continued. "I wasn't doing so good after the accident. In fact, I was a mess. I used alcohol to numb what I was feeling. Living in a world where you and I were broken up was tough enough, you can only imagine how I felt about living in a world that you're not really in."

Leo gently touched the side of Jesse's face, remembering the soft touch of his skin when they used to kiss.

"But I got better," Leo continued, "I went to rehab and got the help I needed. Nick and Kurt have been really helping me get through everything. Someone else too actually helped me out a lot. His name's Tristan, he's a really nice guy, very caring and loving. He reminds me of you a bit actually. Him and I have gotten really close. For a while I felt as if I was cheating on you, but you're not coming back to me are you? So I guess I really do have to move on. A part of me is hoping that you'll wake up right now and we can just pick up where we left off, but I know that's not going to happen."

Leo began thinking of everything the two went through over the years, all the love all the tears, good and bad times. This time though when he thought of all those things he didn't feel like falling apart and drinking, instead he felt stronger, he felt gratitude for what him and Jesse had. He leaned over and kissed Jesse on the forehead.

"I love you," Leo said, "And don't worry, Tristan really is a good guy."

Leo then got up and left the room. When he got out he let out a huge sigh. Kurt came up to him and put his arm around him.

"You okay?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah," Leo replied, "I am."

"Come on, let's go home," Kurt said as the two walked away together.

Back at Luke's place, Nick and Luke were lying in bed together after just having sex.

"I don't think that was considered taking it slow," Luke said.

"No, not at all," Nick replied.

"Do you regret it?" Luke asked.

"Well, it wasn't our best judgement," Nick replied, "But, no, I don't regret it."

"Me neither," Luke said.

"I should get going though," Nick said getting up and getting dressed, "I'm supposed to meet Kurt and Leo for dinner."

"Okay," Luke said, "Can I see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'll call you," Nick said putting his shirt on. "Luke, from now on though, we need to take it slower."

"I agree," Luke said, "Definitely take things slower."

"I'll see you later," Nick said giving Luke a kiss.

"Did you want to see my family this weekend?" Luke asked.

"Yeah, sounds great," Nick replied as he hurried off. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Good night," Luke called out.

Nick met up with Kurt and Leo at the restaurant and was very quiet when they all sat down together.

"Everything all right?" Leo asked.

"Yeah," Nick replied quickly, "Everything is great."

"You're such a liar. What's up?" Leo asked.

"Nothing," Nick replied, "I just saw Luke this afternoon."

"Oh barf," Leo groaned.

"Leo," Kurt warned, "You said you'd be better."

"You're right," Leo said, "I'm sorry. So what happened?"

"We talked," Nick began and then whispered under his breath, "Had sex."

"You sleaze," Kurt teased. "Only a day after the first date?"

"Well, technically it wasn't the first date," Nick replied.

"Three years ago doesn't count," Kurt said, "Spill it."

"I didn't mean for it to happen," Nick said.

"How do you not mean for it happen?" Leo asked, "Oops, sorry I didn't mean to stick my dick there."

"Okay, that was a disgustingly graphic statement," Nick replied.

"Yeah, I'm going to be horrified by that all day now," Kurt replied. "So how was it Nick?"

"It was good, great, well, it was amazing, mind blowing even," Nick said, "But that's not the point."

"What is the point?" Leo asked.

"The point is, him and I are supposed to be taking things slow," Nick replied. "And then we go and sleep together."

"Well, do you regret it?" Kurt asked.

"No," Nick replied.

"Then I really don't see the problem," Kurt said.

"The problem is that I still have some anger towards him and I can't fully let myself be with him if I'm still holding on to that anger," Nick said.

"Have you talked to him about it?" Kurt asked.

"It's not exactly something I can easily talk to him about," Nick replied, "What do I say? 'Hey Luke, I'm still pissed at you. Just wait until I get over it. It's only been three years.'"

"What do you want him to say to let go of your anger?" Kurt asked.

"That's the thing, he's already told me that he's sorry and that he regrets it," Nick said, "I should be feeling good about the situation."

"Or maybe it's just because Luke is an ass," Leo chimed in.

"Leo, if I'm going to start dating him again, I need you to be a little nicer okay?" Nick asked.

"I know, I'm sorry," Leo said, "But I just remember how hard it was for you when you two broke up. I'm just worried he'll do it again."

"Maybe that's why you're still mad," Kurt suggested, "You think it will happen again."

"Well it's not like he can promise me it won't," Nick replied, "I just have to learn to trust him again, which is going to take time."

"I'm sure you two can work it out," Kurt said.

"I'm going with him this weekend to see his family again," Nick said.

"Wow, already going back to see the family?" Kurt asked.

"What about taking it slow?" Leo asked.

"You think it's too soon for me to see his family?" Nick asked.

"If it's too soon for you to get intimate," Kurt said, "It's probably too soon to see the family again."

"Yeah, you're right," Nick nodded. "I shouldn't go."

"Good call," Leo said.

"So how are you doing Kurt?" Nick asked.

"I'm okay," Kurt replied

"I still can't believe Reese did that," Leo said.

"Me neither," Kurt replied.

"I think you should at least call Ryan," Nick said, "Let him know what happened."

"And what would that do?" Kurt asked. "He would still be in Florida while I'm here. I just have to face that Ryan and I just aren't meant to be."

"You two were so good together though," Nick said.

"But he'll find someone else," Leo encouraged.

"Yeah, you're a great catch," Nick said, "I'm sure another guy will come along and sweep you off your feet."

"Hopefully not a psycho this time," Kurt quipped.

"Yeah," Nick replied before thinking how much things have changed with the three of them, "Have you guys noticed how much has changed lately?"

"Yeah," Kurt replied, "Things have been crazy."

"But I think we've grown a lot," Nick said. "Leo has gotten out of rehab and gotten control of his life again, Kurt you have a good job and now have freedom to explore dating, and I'm rekindling things with Luke. I think this is going to be a good time for us from now on."

"We'll see," Kurt said.

"Hopefully Tristan gets out of rehab soon so we can start things up on a more official basis," Leo said.

"Leo, it's really great that you're moving on," Nick said.

"Yeah, I went and said bye to Jesse today," Leo said.

"You did?" Nick asked.

"Yeah."

"How was it?" Nick asked.

"You know, I actually felt okay," Leo began, "I was able to go in and say bye to him and for once my world didn't feel like it was coming apart. Just felt like I was putting an end to a very long chapter of my life."

"And now you can start a new one," Nick said. "That's great. We've been keeping an eye on him while you were at rehab."

"Thank you," Leo replied, "It's too bad there hasn't been any change in his condition."

"Well, it hasn't gotten worse," Kurt pointed out, trying to find the positive, "That's good."

"I should call his parents this week and see how they are," Leo said.

"Kurt and I went and saw them this past week," Nick said, "They seemed okay. Sad, but they're getting through it."

"Thanks for doing that," Leo said.

"Of course, we love Jesse a lot too," Kurt said.

"Yeah, and while I'm never going to stop loving him, I finally feel like I can move on," Leo said.

"That calls for a toast," Nick said raising his glass.

Kurt and Leo both lifted up their glasses as well. "To Leo, welcome home."

"Welcome home," Kurt repeated.

"Thanks guys," Leo said as they clinked glasses.

That night after dinner when the guys went home they all went into their rooms to contemplate their new beginnings, their new chapters of their lives. At Nick's place he was laying down in bed and looking at old pictures of him and Luke when they were together. He kept a small shoe box filled with pictures of the two of them, pictures with his family, pictures with Nick's family. While he really wants things to go back to the way they were with the two, he knew they needed to take things slow. He picked up the phone and called Luke.

"Hey, I didn't think I'd hear from you until tomorrow," Luke said answering his phone.

"Yeah, I just wanted to talk to you about something," Nick said.

"What's up?" Luke asked.

"Listen, I really want things to go back to how they were between us," Nick began, "I really do. But we do need to take things slow and build up to that. Do you get what I mean?"

"Yeah, I know," Luke replied, "Are you starting to regret what we did?"

"No," Nick replied, "I don't regret it, I just think from now on we need to be a little smarter in how we go about this. So I don't think I should be going over to your family's place just yet."

"Okay," Luke replied, "Absolutely. I don't want to rush this, I really want it to work this time."

"Me too," Nick said.

"And Nick," Luke said, "Thank you again for giving me another chance. I won't screw it up."

Hearing the sincerity of Luke when he said that made Nick let go of some of his anger, while there was still a lot that needed to be built up, he felt more confident that this time it would last.

Over at Kurt and Leo's place, Kurt was in his room taking the photo album he made of him and Ryan together and flipped through it a bit before putting it away in a box of his own. He then went around the room and took other pictures of the two of them together and put it in the box. He closed the box up and put it in his closet. It's now time for him to try and move on and say goodbye to the hope of him and Ryan together.

In Leo's room, Leo had his own box with stuff of him and Jesse. He put the pictures in his room inside the box. He went to his bag he didn't unpack yet and pulled out the picture of him and Jesse he had in rehab. He kissed the picture and put it inside the box. He put the box under his bed and sat down realizing how for the first time, he felt okay about moving on. He dug into his pant pocket and pulled out the bottle cap Tristan had given him. He smiled as he looked at it and then held it tightly in his hand smiling at the thought of Tristan and him together.

To Be Continued...

With any comments, questions or feedback please e-mail me at ilj4ever44@yahoo.com. Thanks so much! Hope to hear from you!

Next: Chapter 22


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