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YOU KNOW HE'S SUB, DON'T YOU? - PART 95
Second book : YOU BELONG TO JOBAL PART 42 - this is it
YEAH: SO THIS IS IT. WHUMP. SO LOOK AWAY IF YOU DON'T LIKE WHUMP - AND DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME!
Yeah. Cause, I think that that was when Po took charge. I ...
I don't know why I'm reluctant to write this.
He held something - like, over my face yeah? Like something like poppers but something else, yeah. And more or less continuously from then on, and ... and I breathed in and it clouded my mind and ...
... so my heart was beating and I felt sort of sick and faint and Po gripped my head right and pushed his junk hard up against me like to remind me what it was all about and I remember he said, "I'm rooting for you. You rooting for me?" and so I tried to breathe normally - like to inhale it. Cause I knew he wanted me to, like to help me; and I mean it did! Even though I couldn't breath, like with the panic; but then I could feel his penis hard and thick rubbing against me; and I remember that I did think, despite it all, I remember thinking, 'Yes. Let's do this!' Why? Because: Po's dick! Which doesn't make sense, I know, but it did sort of make sense ... cause I wanted it yeah?
Yeah. I wanted it.
So that was it, wasn't it? That was it. I mean, I do remember it partly: Po was holding me tight, and quietly saying things like, "Yeah, good man. Just keep it together; let Akim do his job; you do yours, which is: to keep quiet, yeah? Good man," which I did, and "Good man; you can do this," his arms right around me, "I got y'. I got y'babes," meaning like, he was there for me; he was there with me, holding me tight, his fingers digging into me, and holding this cloth with this, like, stuff in it, over my face, to help me relax ... I suppose. So I do remember it, up to a point, but also, I don't remember it, not it exactly ... I mean I was shaking and I was trying to breathe but the gag was sort of like, frothing, and if I was panicking, well, I mean, I WAS panicking (wouldn't you?) until when Akim shouted at Po, "For. Fuck. Sake. Po! Get a grip on him! Do your job! Keep him fucking still. You too, Jobal! And stop squawking! You! Shut the fuck up!" - he said that to me, like I suppose I must have been making some sort of noise, cause I was scared or something. Only ... well I was scared cause of Akim saying to me, "Stop fucking snivelling! You are fucking pathetic. Stop! Stop crying. You can take it even if you're not even a fucking man, so take it and fucking man the fucking man up! And don't flinch. He mustn't flinch. Fucking hold him! Fuck ING! Hold him the fucking fuck! FUCK!"
So they still had to hold me, like in a group while Akim actually ... You know ... Well I just said no I wasn't going to go into details so ...
All I know ...
Was.
When.
Po held my head.
And pressed his crotch into me so I could feel how excited he was, and his job was basically constantly holding my head with this dope to blank my head ... I think. Cause he held it over my, my nose like I inhaled it ... cause ... cause ... I needed it so much. Po. I need you so much. Po. I need you so much.
Yeah?
And then ...
Ok. Like until -
I was so out of it.
My heart was like thumping stupid! and I said, 'YeathssSir', everything Po said, like comfortingly. But if he said, like, did I want it? I said YesthSrrr! No matter what it was, I said, YethhSsssss! Cause it just made me want it - plus I didn't even know if I was standing up or lying down even! Well it was extreme, quite honestly. All the ... all, yeah, well, like I said, best not to go on about it.
I just said, Yehsss ss ...
And Po said, "Oh baby, I love this. You are just so sub!"
Which I was. I was sub. I was HIS sub. Obviously.
I mean, yeah, I did it - or they did it, Jobal and Christopher and Po and these others, Urib and the two Princes, but mainly Akim who kind of knew all what it was about. The others just held me, like they was my brothers, my big brothers, family, helping me through it, helping me through.
And when Akim started they all started laughing, like, yeah, cause it was funny, yeah? Not funny but like it was? Cause they couldn't believe it. And I was screaming.
Po held his strong arms around me; I could feel his breath on me, and the smell of him really close, and the strength of his arms, and knowing that he was at that moment only thinking about me and only caring about me and nothing else. "You're doing so well," he said.- he was holding my head and whispering into my ear, "So do it for me."
I mean, one thing I DO remember is though, is Po, saying, "It'll be over soon," when I must'a looked like I must'a thought it'd never be over - cause it went, like it would never stop. I think it was me screaming but I can't tell, cause all I was thinking was, 'No! No! Not again!' But I couldn't stop.
Yeah. And I remember Po said, "You're so sexy when you're screaming ..." but not much else cause ... But he was kind of soft like, sort of comforting, holding my head so that the gag didn't come out, and when I was in full panic, I mean cause I did panic especially when I could feel it - like I said - so he put his hands round my two shoulders and made me keep still. He held me. I could feel his groin like pushing into me like, 'Yeah, feel me here, feel your owner holding you and wanting you to do this ...' He was like that. But also he was like I could see on his face, when I opened my eyes and I looked at him, like the genuine concern and I remember I was thinking, 'I know HE couldn't do this,' and it was like he genuinely didn't know if I could do it, cause he genuinely couldn't do it so he didn't know that I could.
"Just one more," said Akim.
My naked body.
All of it.
And I kept thinking, 'Po, I love you so much! I love you so much!' It was like he released a drug in my head that meant I never hurt or anything or if I did it was like beautiful and lovely, like the more I hurt the more I loved him and the more I loved him the more it could hurt cause it meant I loved him, and the more he made me hurt or wanted me to hurt the more we were in love with each other. If you can understand that ... But that's how it was, and that's the gods honest truth.
Akim I think said, "Just another one ... here. Hold. Fucking. Still! Just one more."
But he'd already said that !!
And I thought, "This is barmy!"
... But it WAS like I needed it, yeah? Even if it was ... even if it ... I needed it and I wanted it, and, just like Po said: it was like some door opened up in my head and I felt all weak, but strong, and I could take anything and it was ... yeah, it was like that. Cause I felt it, didn't I? I felt it change my mind yeah? I literally felt myself lose my mind and, well, Whump and, well that was that. I mean, yeah? And I - And. And what? What? What, you thought I was going to tell you about it? You thought I was going to tell you all fucking details? Like, ALL of it? Did you? Honestly? Fucking no way! No. I ... quite honestly? I don't even fucking remember all that much anyway do I? I felt like a spaceman going into outer space looking back at the tiny earth and there was our island and our town and the railway, and the arch and us, all tiny in the great big Universe ... I don't even remember when Akim said, "Ok we're fucking done. Clear up."
So.
*** So of course the healing process can take quite a few weeks - not like a hickey fades in a few days! (Remember that?) It had to have stuff on it to keep it from infecting. But it was ok in the end. I'm not sure how I'd feel about it if I got infected. That could be quite serious so you know: don't try this at home - haha like you would! Like anyone would.
But now I'm fucking done yeah? And? Well there's these fucking like, like great like scars, like great big graffiti, like raised skin, that make me look - well, you said it: super-horney! And slutty. And slavey. And, and I could just lift my shirt and show off, like, 'Yeah, look at this!' Super horney, what I'm really proud of it, so if they told me, like, "Show'em off," I could always, "Yes Sir," and there it was: Proof.
And I KNEW that I was! I was truly! And that was proof I could do it. Proof. Proof I was a genuine slave and proof, I was in Jobal's crew, and proof I was really owned and not just playing at it or fucking around. For real. Proof.
And I bet YOU was all like, 'Will he go through with it?' Yeah, I bet! But I did! Yeah? So fuck you! I did! So now I'm totally owned and you can't fuck with me, yeah? Yeah, fuck you!
Fuck everything.
I was SO proud! I'd look in the mirror: my muscles was marked like a bible, great big letters and lines, lines and shapes. It turned me on just to feel it there and trace it with my fingertips and look at it like a pattern covering my body and showing off where the curves and the muscles, where it went and where it had been.
Cause I don't think you could have gone through with it, could you? I mean you like reading this stuff cause it makes you hard and when you start rubbing your dick you think, 'Yeah, I'd like that!' but you don't actually have the hard core balls to actually go through with it, with something like that, like altering and permanent, sheer fucking awful terrifying painful, as doing that, would you? Admit it.
Just as well. Don't. Don't try it. But you won't, cause ... you probably think I'm stupid.
But I'm not stupid.
So.
Whump. That was it.
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END OF YOU KNOW HE'S SUB, DON'T YOU? - PART 95