My week has been booked non-stop with client meetings and planning for court and it seems that my upcoming overnight for pre-trial planning with another attorney in Atlanta is going to be a challenge to make happen. Thankfully, I am planning to make the four-hour drive rather than fly so I can squeeze every drop from the day before hitting the road late Thursday. As Thursday arrives, I feel almost excited to have 4 hours to myself. Maybe I can listen to a good book and let the stress of being a lawyer melt away, if only for a few hours. 4 PM on Thursday arrives and I see a break so I grab my case file and head for the car. My car...my little slice of heaven. As a married dad with 2 kids wrapping up high school and a wife who lives everyday helicoptering over the kids and precious little time for me, I made the decision that I'd do a "me thing" and buy an Audi A7. I rationalized that I deserved something that would pamper me and allow me to feel special. Admittedly, I will confess that I have felt wasteful and crazy for doing it but as I start the car and pull on to the interstate headed to Atlanta...my hairy, muscled ass melts into the seat and my mind goes to work thinking about life.
Life...47, still have my college good looks and have also managed to keep a fit and toned body. At 6'1, 190, I feel OK about me. The lightly graying temples against my dark brown hair, matched with my steel blue eyes have earned me more than one head turn as I suit up and head into court. I'd never show it but that always makes me smile to myself. But there is still this part of me that feels unloved. No matter how hard I work to be on my game, carry myself like a successful guy...be all things to all people...part of me just feels unworthy and unloved. Liz's 110% full life with time and attention for everyone but me dents my ego more than I care to admit. And sex...what sex? There are times when I find myself just staring out the window and imagining myself walking in and telling her that I am cashing out...done...and moving on. But I can't leave the kids. I love them and they love and need me. Sometimes I think I am the one who keeps them grounded and real. It makes my heart sing that when things are rough for either of them, they find me and we work it out. I feel so lucky and blessed for that.
An hour into my drive, I need to stop and pee. I check the upcoming exits...a gas station... no. A fast food restaurant...definitely no. Ahhh there it is...REST AREA one mile. I can make it. I pull in and make my way to the men's room. It's only a little after 5 so I'm fighting my way in with campers, truckers, a family of 6...damn...and a bus of old folks headed somewhere. I make it quick but not before I noticed a nice looking man...maybe 50, jeans and a tee with hiking boots. He was two urinals down from me, a bear and I could see the hair coming out of his tee and for just a minute my mind went south of the boarder...imagining what was under those jeans.
It's been many years since I actually experienced a man. My first year as a lawyer...at a conference...I met him at the hotel bar and he talked me into going back to his room. Was nervous as hell but he was smooth. When his hands touched my nips, I was toast. I felt electricity race through my body and before I knew it, he had his hands under the waist of my pants, cupping my dick and balls and then...I was naked and spread out on the bed like a wishbone at Thanksgiving! He roamed my body with his tongue and when he got to my asshole, he dug in with a passion. I was on fire! Finally, he settled in and sucked my dick and I felt like I was going to slide, dick first, down his throat. He took all thick 7 inches of me and nursed me like a fine wine for what seemed like an hour until I flooded his mouth with a week's load of cum. I fled in great remorse when he was done and swore that I'd never go down that path again. But the truth is, some part of me has always been attracted to men...I've always knows that...but I willed it away. I wanted a life with a wife, kids, the house in the burbs, church, friends, great neighbors...the works. I had seen men take a different path and I knew that I wanted as close to 60's TV as I could get! And I worked hard to get it! I thought to myself, "be careful what you wish for".
Out of the restroom and back in my sweet A7, I get back on the road and settle in for another 3 hours. I keep thinking about the bear at the Rest Area. Not him exactly, but the idea of going "south of the boarder" with a man. I remembered the guy from the bar in my early career. I made up men as the miles passed. Handsome men. Men like me, I thought. I could see their body and I could feel the heat of one after the other holding me...kissing me...rubbing my back, my ass, my legs...loving on me. The thought brought me a sense of calm and comfort. I realized that I was as excited by their attention as I was by the physical touch of their body. In fact, I looked down and there in my lap was a small wet circle in my dress slacks. The ole boy was leaking some slippery, clear juice as I allowed each man in my wild imagination to take me...all of me. In my life, I have little time for such imagining. Today...as Charlotte faded away and Atlanta came closer, the soft, low music on my radio and the fact that I was all alone allowed my mind to wonder...and wonder I did.
As I came into Atlanta, with the thought of man after man touching all parts of me, I remembered reading about a gay bar that had a blackout night on Thursday. "Wait...it's Thursday and I am in Atlanta and it's Thursday and...NO! No way! I'm not that crazy. And who knows if that bar is still around or if blackout night is still a part of the deal. Stay focused, Will. You are smart and you have things to do. Forget it. Where is my audio book? Where is that bar? What was the name again? No!" With a few strokes on my iPhone, I had the bar and the address. And...shit...tonight was blackout night. "Don't do this, Will! Head to the hotel...prepare for tomorrow and get some rest".
With my heart racing and my mind telling me to stop, turn around and get my ass back on the road to the hotel, I slowly pulled into the bar parking lot. The place was busier than I imagined it would be. There were guys hanging around outside and I could hear the beat of music coming from the inside. "What harm is there in me just going in and having a drink? I'll stay at the bar, see what this blackout thing is all about and then I'll leave. OK...half a drink". I had showered during a quick workout at lunch and felt crisp and a little horny. I was in full suit mode and I guess I looked a little out of place as I made my way to the door. "Here we go!"
As I walked to the door, it was as if I was being consumed by the floating fumes of desire. My head was actually feeling a little light and I could almost hear my own heart racing. As I walked past a group of guys, I was shocked to hear them making noises...I wondered what they were hollering at. It took me a moment to realize that they were actually "cat calling" me. I heard one guy say, "dammmmn...I want that hot daddy!". I felt a hand rub my ass and one touch my hair. "GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE, WILL". But the scent continued in my mind and I kept moving for the door and in I went. The bar was not so dark after all. I was actually a little disappointed that I could actually see the bar and several people standing around having drinks and talking. "Where is the blackout part of this adventure", I thought. But as my eyes adjusted, I could see that the bar was all that was really lite and the rest of the bar appeared to fade to darkness several feet out. The music was loud...really loud...and people were clearly checking out anyone and everyone who walked in the door. After the cat calling, I decided that I better up my game and pay close attention to what was going on around me. I was intoxicated! Men of all ages, shapes and sizes were checking me out. Me...lawyer Will...in my pre-cum stained suit smelling all fresh and "lawyer looking". I could feel the beating of my heart in the sides of my neck and the flush of my face as I had this crazy thought that somehow...these people wanted me. "Stop it, Will...half a drink and then your ass is headed to the hotel and this will be a memory that will be your jacking off mental video for years to cum".
I stepped up to the bar and ordered a beer. "OK...half and counting and then we're done". As I took my first sip, my eyes were adjusting to the dark and I began to notice the depths of the bar stretched back and to the sides..." were there rooms?". I could see faint lights...like signs for liquor on the walls but not much else. I could not stop myself and I took my beer and began slowly, carefully walking towards the dark. I felt like I was stepping onto a ride at a fair and was about to be swept up into the air for a high like I had never experienced! I loosened my tie and rolled up my sleeves. I could hear low voices and occasionally I could hear soft moans. Moans... "wait...that means...wait...LEAVE?" I could not stop myself and I kept walking deeper into the dark. I felt hands brush me. A few pinched my nipples. Some touched my dick through my suit pants. Many patted my ass. One guy tried to grab and kiss me but I kept moving. I slowly relaxed my own hands away from my body where I had been holding them close to my side as I clutched my beer. With my free hand, I allowed it to hang down, palm open and I started to reach and see what I could feel. I felt rough fabric...jeans. Hairy arms...shirtless men...backs...hairy chest...and then...to my total shock, the unmistaken feel of an erect penis. It was totally dark and I froze! He did not move. I did not move. I reached out again and hit gold. I had a dick in my hand! A big dick. It was hard, lots of hair, big balls...they felt full and soft and hot to the touch. I wondered to the tip and felt a warm and slippery tip...pre-cum. I pulled back and kept walking! While I was walking, guys had managed to untuck my shirt and several were slipping their hands under my shirt...rubbing my back, stomach and playing with my nipples. I could actually feel the pre-cum leaking from me...I kept moving.
Soon, I got to a wall...so I backed up in the dark and caught my breath. My head was really spinning now and I was drunk on hormones. My clothes were disheveled and I was someplace between wanting to strip naked and run back into the crowd or straightening my clothes and run my ass for the door. This dance of going into the crowd and headed back to the wall continued until somewhere around midnight. I felt and played with no less than 20 dicks. Still terrified and still retreating once I felt the warmth of pre-man juice. I could hear pure, raw sex taking place and I got as close as I could without getting pulled into the act. I saw a few cell phones light up the action and almost passed out with excitement as I saw one guy being held by his arms and legs as several guys fucked him. My beer was long gone and I was well past my curfew but I was soaking it in and loving the sights and attention.
Somewhere after midnight, I decided to wonder out of the dark and back to the bar for another beer. The crowd had thinned but for those who remained, the intensity seemed to be picking up. There was almost a shift in the code of conduct as the night got later. I could tell, guys were looser and there seemed to be less clothes and less inhabitations. My fears renewed as I stepped back in the light and I once again questioned my actions...and thought it was time to get safely to the hotel and step back into my neat and ordered world. Just then, my world changed. From the corner of my eye, I saw an out-stretched hand and enter Mr. and Mr. Hot, Steve and Kevin. They were partnered, seemingly normal as normal could be and just hot as hell! They were probably in their early 50's, tall and well-built and both had their shirt off and both had a mound of chest hair that said, "suck my nips!". I started to melt. We talked about normal things and I quickly trusted these guys. They seemed like normal guys out for a fun night on the town. Steve asked me if I wanted to walk back into the rear of the bar with them and before my second beer lost its cool...I was nodding yes and off we went.
Once we were back in the dark, the intensity of the crowd was crazy...great crazy...but still crazy. Hands were all over me and this time, my zipper was released and some guy hauled my dick out of my briefs and he fell to his knees and began sucking my dick and tonguing my pee hole in what seemed like pure heaven on earth. I went back in my mind to my night at the hotel many years ago and felt myself give in and let go. Steve and Kevin were right with me and both started to unbutton my shirt and lick and suck my hairy chest - taking great pride in their nipple worship abilities. I was on fire! I felt my belt being loosened and my pants fell to the floor and my feet were pulled free and my socks removed. Mr. cock worshiper got serious about the art of dick sucking and sucked my dick and my swollen balls like he had not eaten in months. It was all happening so fast but before I knew it, I was naked except for my shirt which was open and my tie was...who knows where my tie was. Then the 3 of them actually picked me up and laid me on...what felt like...a bar. There I was, legs spread wide open, balls flopping, my rock hard dick waving in the air and now...at least 5 men with their hands and mouths all over me. Steve whispered that he and Kevin were there and watching to be sure I was safe and he slipped some poppers under my nose. I went limp and let myself go to a place I had never been sexually in all my 47 years!
During the next...I'm not sure how long but it seemed like hours...I was the total center of sexual attention. Two guys held my legs up, exposing my hairy asshole and some guy...ever so tenderly...slid his tongue between my ass cheeks and dug it into my asshole. I could feel whiskers, felt him blow on my hole, felt his finger gently tickle and rub my hole and then his tongue lick and flick in and out of my hole. I could feel another guy sucking on my balls...rolling them around in his mouth...gently tugging them...holding them.... licking them. Someone was tenderly biting my pubic hair and roaming up and down my stomach and chest with their mouth...using their tongue like a feather. There was at least one guy...I think more who had my feet and were sucking my toes and tenderly rubbing my feet and legs. And, as for my dick, I could tell several guys nursed and sucked on it and I was oozing pre-cum and they would edge me and stop before I could cum. Steve and Kevin would alternate, holding my head, gently kissing me while hugging me and feeding me poppers. I was adrift in complete and total man sex heaven! After what seemed like hours, I could feel the cum building at such an intensity that I knew I could not hold it back. My body arched off the bar and the guys held me and let me rock and buck and some guy locked on to my man meat and drank every drop I blew and licked me clean and then kept sucking. I've never felt so free!
The totally wild thing was...I knew I could cum again and the party continued. No one stopped and I was sure sex would never be this great again! With round 2, some of the guys just started blowing their own loads and I could feel man cum splattering on my stomach and chest and running into my chest hair and dripping down the sides of my chest. I was soaked with cum, sweat and man slobber and I was a happy man! It did not take long before I felt the build of more cum working its way out of my massive man balls and up my dick shaft...headed with a power surge to my pee hole. Still, another hunger man took my throbbing dick all the way down his throat and I blew for what seemed a minute. I could not stop bucking and thrusting my hips and ass and when I was done...I just lay there naked and spent in the dark on that bar surrounded by men touching and rubbing me. Un-fucking-believable!
I sat up...with the help of Steve and Kevin. They made sure I was OK and recovered and sweet Kevin actually had my clothes and they both helped me dress. I was still a mess but a happy mess!
The next morning was tough. I was tired but completely on my game as I thought about my night in blackout heaven. What was next...not sure. I'll come back to that.