Where Do We Go

By musicfan

Published on Feb 3, 2001

Gay

Disclaimer:

The following story is the ninth installment in an on going series about Stephen Gately from Boyzone and what I imagine to be the story behind the beginning of his relationship with Eloy de Jong from Caught in the Act. I have no contact with either person, nor know any of the members of either group.

Stephen woke up to the smell of breakfast cooking downstairs. He lay with his eyes closed, enjoying the smell of the bacon wafting up the stairs. He was home. No reasons to get up, or rush out the door, or appointments to make. Nothing. It was a blessed relief to be able to think that. He stretched hearing muscles pop. His bladder insisted he get up. With a yawn, he pushed back the covers and got out of bed.

A glance at his younger brother produced a chuckle. Tony lay sprawled across his bed, one hand dangling over the bed where he had dropped his comic book. He had kicked his covers off, and they lay on the floor in between their beds. Stephen gingerly stepped over covers, not sure what might be lurking underneath. He grinned as he looked at Tony's side of the room. He hadn't noticed it the night before when he had come in, but not one scrap of wall showed through all of the posters Tony had up over his bed. There were all kinds of things in a great montage --- cars, sports, the Spices.... the images were a chaotic blend from a 16 year old imagination. Stephen rolled his eyes, shaking his head. He leaned over his suitcase and opened up the closet door. Hopefully there was something of his tucked into the back corner. He didn't really feel like looking in his suitcase at the moment. Finding an old pair of jeans he thought might just fit, he slung them over his sh! oulder and eased his way out of the room, closing the door softly behind him.

Pausing on his way to the bathroom, he could hear his parents talking downstairs. With a smile he headed in to wash up. He didn't bother with taking a shower, not planning on doing anything where he had to go out today. He had no desire to do anything more than just hang around the house and get used to being home for a bit. He rubbed his chin and looked in the mirror, and decided he didn't have to shave, either. Let him be grubby! After finishing everything he needed to do, he pulled his jeans on, a bit surprised to find they were loose on him. Usually he gained weight while on tour, but this one had been a particularly grueling pace. With a shrug he tucked his undershirt in and went to find out what his mother had left over for breakfast.

"Mornin'," he said as he walked through the door into the small kitchen. His parents were sitting at the table, cradling coffee mugs. His mother smiled warmly as he leaned down to give her a kiss on the cheek, and his father gave him a wink as he sat down. As soon as he did, his mother got up and went to the stove, pulling out a warm plate with thick Irish bacon on it.

"I thought you'd be down once you got a whiff of this," she said, smiling. "I'll just finish up these eggs and you can have this in a bit."

"No need to rush, Mam. I don't plan on going anywhere today," Stephen said with a heartfelt sigh. His father laughed and turned the page of the Dublin Times.

"Still feeling a bit knackered?" He asked sympathetically. He didn't really understand what kept his son so busy, not really having gone to any of the promotional appearances that Stephen did locally, but he could see the bone-deep weariness in his son's face.

"Not so much that," Stephen said. "Just happy not to be running around. There were points on this last leg that I didn't know if I was coming or going. Probably both, the pace we kept up with!" He gave his mother a grateful smile as she placed the plate in front of him, and closed his eyes. The aroma was incredible, and he took a moment to savor it. Bowing his head, he crossed himself and sent a silent prayer of thanks for his family before opening his eyes and picking up a fork. His mother placed a glass of milk by his plate and sat down again. "Thank you, Mam. You didn't need to go through all this just for me."

"Of course I didn't," she said indulgently. "But it's my way of welcoming you home, since I nattered your ear off last night. Put you right to sleep, I did!"

"Ah, you didn't!" Stephen protested around a mouth of fried egg. His mother quickly admonished him for talking with his mouth full of food and he ducked his head. He found he was starved and quickly went through the plate of food. He did decline another from his mother, not wanting her to go through the trouble, and was just finishing up when the front door opened and he heard his sister's voice.

"I'm up," he called pushing back his chair and carrying his dishes to the sink to wash. He heard the patter of his nephew's feet down the hall as they made their way back to the kitchen.

"Uncle Steve!" His nephew Jordan cried, bouncing with excitement at the prospect of seeing his uncle. He had been very put out when he found he had to stay with Nana the night before so his mom could go pick his uncle up at the airport. He had wanted to go, too. He burst through the swinging kitchen door, Michelle catching it on the rebound before it hit her in the face. He barreled over to the where Stephen was standing near the sink and wrapped his arms around his uncle's legs. Stephen pretended to stagger under the onslaught, which made Jordan giggle. "You're home!"

"Oooof!" Stephen said, leaning back against the counter to brace himself. Laughing, he looked down at the limpet hanging onto his knees. "Yes, I am!"

"I've missed you!" Jordan declared, letting go and raising his arms to be picked up and be cuddled by his favorite uncle. Stephen obliged by reaching down and letting Jordan wrap his arms around his neck. As he picked the little boy up, Jordan gave him a big smooch. "Don't go away ever again!" He declared, his face very serious. "Promise!"

"Oh, I wish I could, buddy. But sometimes I have to go do work, even when I really don't want to. I'd much rather stay and spend my time with you." Stephen said, just as serious. He hugged Jordan and winked at his sister, who was pouring herself a cup of coffee. "Hey beautiful, how are you?"

She rolled her eyes and made a disgusted snort. "Please."

"All right. Hey beautiful, how are you, please?" He answered, walking over to where she stood to give her a kiss. "You are beautiful, you know. The most beautiful sister a man could have."

"And the only sister this man could have," she declared, poking him in the arm and laughing. "Flatterer!"

"I'm just telling the truth. Aren't I?" Stephen asked his nephew, who nodded in agreement. "See? Two to one in favor, so we have to be right." Michelle made a face at him, but leaned into him, wrapping her arm around her son and brother as she gave them both a hug.

"Well, I for one don't think so, but thank you anyway. And I'm lovely this morning, hon. Thanks for asking." She let go and picked her coffee mug off the counter, taking a sip. Moving over to the table, she gave their parents kisses and sat down at the table, nicking her father's paper to peek at the headlines. He smiled indulgently at his only daughter. Stephen sat back down in his chair, sitting Jordan in his lap. His mom gave him a slice of bacon which he gobbled up greedily. He sat there, kicking his legs idly and listening to the adults chat.

"Sleep well?" Michelle asked, leaning her hand on her chin and looking expectantly at her brother.

"Very, thanks. Tony's still sleeping like the undead upstairs himself. Lord, but it was so good to be back home in my own bed again!" He said with a heartfelt sigh.

"And how was the tour? Good? Any fun stories?" She shot question after question to him, eliciting giggles from her son with her rapid fire talking. In between questions, Stephen would get in a word or two, but she was too busy asking to listen to any of the answers. After the barrage had finished she waited for him to answer all her questions.

"Good, no, no time for fun stories. We hit 45 cities in 60 days, so no, no time to stop and shop anywhere, unfortunately. Though I was sorely tempted at one place, but we just drove on by. I think I saw something of interest here or there, but frankly we were all sleeping on the bus most of the time. In between we stopped and did a lot of signings at local stations here or there, and a couple of charity things at the same time. The boys are all fine, Keith's Jordan is getting as big as our little man here, and no, I didn't get Peter Andre's autograph for you," he teased as she stuck her tongue out at him. "He's a bit ticked at us anyhow. We had a bit of a laugh on tour at his expense and I think he took it a bit too seriously. That lad needs to lighten up more. Let's see, what else?"

His father was shaking his head, listening to their conversation. "Well, I'd best be off. Got a job today to do and it won't get done with me sitting around here. I'll see you all later," he said, patting his children on the shoulders as he leaned over to give his wife a kiss and head out the door.

"Have a good day, Dad," Stephen said as he left. He sat back in the chair, Jordan cuddled against his chest, a bit sleepy from listening to all the talking going on over his head. Stephen rested his cheek against Jordan's head and wrapped his arms around the little boy. Smiling at his sister, he sat and listened to her chatter with their mother about stuff that was going on around town.

A short time later, Tony walked in, still wearing his pajamas and scratching his chest. He waved to his sister and brother and reached into the stove for the plate of bacon waiting there. His mother scolded him, telling him to wait until she had put some eggs on first. She grabbed the plate away from him, swatting his butt and told him to go sit down. He did, sitting in the chair next to his sister and leaning on the table, looking a bit bleary-eyed.

"Maybe you should go back to bed. You look worse than Stephen does here." She scolded him. "Too many nights staying up all night reading that junk you're into. What is the world coming to?" she asked her mother. Margaret just laughed as she put some eggs in the frying pan after putting the plate back in the stove. Tony just waved her off as he picked up the paper, turning to the back so he could read the sports section first. Stephen sat back, letting the conversation wash over him. It was nice.

They passed the rest of the morning sitting around the table and chatting. He felt a little knot of tension he hadn't realized was even there loosen as he was finally able to relax for the first time in months....


"So, tell me about this boy who's been writing to you so much."

Eloy looked up in surprise at his mother's question. He had been totally absorbed in Stephen's latest letter that he hadn't heard her walk in at all. "Mama!" He exclaimed, standing up and giving her a hug. She gave him a peck on the cheek and sat down. She looked like she had just come from the salon, since her hair was all done up and was a lovely golden color. He complimented her on the new look and she smiled as she tucked her feet under her on the recliner.

"Well?" she asked, waiting patiently. "Tell me about him."

"And how do you know it's a boy who's been writing me, Mama?" Eloy asked teasingly.

"Mothers know these things," she said vaguely, waving her hand absently. "And besides, I always know when you get one."

Eloy looked puzzled for a moment. "And how exactly do you know that?" He asked, intrigued. He had been sitting on the couch in his living room wearing only his jeans, since he had been up on the deck tanning earlier in the day. He had heard the mail truck and had come down, hoping that he could get another letter. He hadn't been disappointed. No Goofy this time, but Jiminy Cricket greeted him on the letterhead.

"Because lately you've changed the way you've been acting, which I think is a good thing, my dear. No need to mope when there's so much life to be lived out there. You perk up each time you get one. And because you left the envelope of one on the counter last week and I saw the handwriting." Her face dimpled as she smiled at him. He chuckled ruefully as he smiled back. His mother could be a little nosy at times, but he really didn't mind. She always had his best interests at heart, and she really did care what happened in her children's lives. "So tell me about this boy."

Eloy sat back and looked at his mother. Shaking his head, he laughed. "Not much to tell. Just a very good friend who's also in the business and is on tour right now. Since he trashed his mobile he's been resorting to letters. I've found it very amusing reading."

His mother tilted her head to one side while watching him. "Mmmm, sounds interesting. You like this boy?"

"Yes, he's a friend," Eloy repeated. "Of course I like him."

"That's not what I asked, darling." She was very serious, looking at him intently. He knew exactly what she meant. It wasn't the first time they had had this kind of conversation. From the first time he had told her about the way he felt, she had known that he had preferred boys to girls. It didn't bother her in the least. To her, one didn't have a choice in where their heart lay. As long as they were happy, she was happy for them.

He considered her question. It was something he had been thinking on for some time. He found he really enjoyed Stephen's company. He loved reading his stories of being on the road. Stephen was a wonderful mimic, and even in his writing, Eloy could feel the flavor of his humour as he told stories about the people travelling with them on the road. And he was comfortable to be with. Never demanding too much, always willing to listen. It was such a contrast with other people he normally spent time with that it stuck out in his mind how right it felt when he thought of them together.

He looked up from the letter he had absently smoothing the creases from. His mother sat in the same position, waiting patiently. "Do I like him? Ja, I believe I do. Very much, Mama. But sometimes, the thought of getting into another relationship so soon is a bit much. And I don't want to think about it at all."

"Do you think he likes you enough to want one?" She asked softly. He stared down at the carpet, not really seeing anything at all.

"I don't know, Mama. We've both have such busy lives that it would be close to impossible to get together. When I think about it, I don't know how it would ever work out." Finally, he had voiced the fear he had shied away from each time he had lain awake at night, thinking of such a thing. Over the past several months since he had last seen Stephen, he had thought a lot on that weekend.

"You love this boy," his mother said emphatically, and he looked up at her, startled. She seemed so sure of herself.

"I don't know, Mama. I think that some day, yes, I could love him. Whether I do now...." He trailed off with a sigh. "I get so confused when I think about it. The weekend we spent...." He hesitated. But his mother knew so much about his life that holding back seemed silly. "It was special."

"You made love with this boy," she guessed.

He sighed. "Ja, I did. And Mama, it was wonderful. But at the same time, it was pretty scary. I felt like I was a little out of control with what happened. And it scares me, Mama." He looked up, trying to explain the gamut of emotions he felt inside. "I just don't know...." He trailed off.

His mother got up and moved to sit next to him on the couch. Wrapping her arm around his shoulders, she hugged him and let him lean his head against her shoulder. She could see the letter in his hand. There were all sorts of little drawings in the margins around the writing on the page. She held out her hand and he gave her the letter. It was in English, which she didn't read at all, but she could see that from the drawings and sketches that this friend of her son's seemed to be an expressive lad.

Eloy leaned back as his mother examined the letter. He knew she couldn't read it, never having bothered to learn English. Not that there was anything in there that he wouldn't want her to see. Stephen hadn't written anything about their weekend in all of his letters, focusing on just what was going on at the moment. He found it quite enjoyable reading.

She looked up from the letter to see the smile on his face. "Tell me about him." She handed the letter back to him, noticing how he folded it carefully and put it aside. Even if he wasn't ready to admit it to himself, this young man was special to her son. Silently, she sent a prayer for it to all work out.

"Well," he said, sitting back and propping himself up against the cushions behind him. "He's Irish. A little younger than I am... about 3 years. Quite good looking. Not that he thinks so." He smiled. As he talked, he found himself wanting to tell her more. So he went through how they first met at a show in Hamburg and how they had found out that they had a lot in common. She saw how his face lit up as he talked about this young man. She found herself wishing that it worked out for them, since obviously this man made Eloy so happy.

"You should invite him over for a visit sometime, so I can meet this boy." She said when he was done talking.

"Maybe I will, Mama. Its just that we're both so busy that getting any time off is a hit or miss thing. I know that he's just finished his tour and is going into the studio for a few weeks. And they're planning on doing some recording in the States. So I don't know if that would be possible. They hope to push this album out for the spring. But it would be nice." Eloy said with a smile. "Oh, he did say in one of his letters to say hi to you and Lucienne. I've told him so much about you two that he said he feels like he knows you already."

She laughed with delight. "Well, tell him I say the same, the next time you talk to him. He sounds like a sweet man, darling."

"He is, Mama. The type to give you the shirt off his back, if he found that you needed it. And not a mean bone in his body." Eloy looked down at the letter with a smile. Making a decision, he patted his mother's arm and told her to wait where she was. Getting up, he walked into the bedroom and crawled across the bed to his nightstand. There, he opened the drawer and pulled out the small pile of letters that he had been saving. He looked down, nodded and gathered them up. Carrying them back into the living room, he settled down besides his mother and sorted them. She didn't say a word, just watched him. When he found the first one, he pulled it out the envelope and showed her the Goofy picture at the top. She smiled. He then proceeded to read each of the letters to her. She listened, enchanted with stories he told. She also noticed how expressive her son's face was as he read each of the letters. Yes, she thought to herself. This was one special young man. ! >From time to time, Eloy would point out one of the drawings that Stephen had scribbled along the side as an illustration of one of his stories.

When he finished, he looked up from the letters. As he had finished each one, he had carefully put it aside and moved on to the next. They rested in a pile on his lap. In reading this last letter, he could see how tired Stephen had gotten over the course of the tour. The handwriting was a little shakier than the others, and there were a lot more misspellings as the letter went on. And from the stories, he could see that Stephen was getting a little down from the pace they had been keeping.

"He sounds like a sweet boy, darling. I hope you do get him to come for a visit sometime so I can meet him." His mother sat back with a sigh. She was a romantic at heart and really wanted to see her son happy.

"He is sweet, Mama." Eloy smiled. He resolved to give Stephen a call in a few days. He hadn't responded to any of the letters since he knew how hard it was to get mail on the road. But he had been thinking of contacting Stephen for a while. Now might be a good time.

"Well, I won't say any more. If it's meant to be, it will work out." She adroitly changed the subject, knowing that to dwell on it anymore would be fruitless.


Later in the day, Michelle had convinced Stephen to make the effort to take a shower and get dressed, and together with Jordan, they went for a walk. Wandering aimlessly around the north side, they came down to the Liffy and sat on a park bench. Jordan rushed over to railing to look out at the ships moving down the river.

"So, other than tiring, how have things been?" Michelle asked, one leg tucked up under her skirt. Stephen smiled at the picture she presented. Long hair getting tossed about in the wind, she tried to hold it off of her face with one hand. Her sweater provided enough shelter for the most part, but she kept her back to the wind as much as she could so she could watch his face.

"Good. Busy. We've been having a blast, but I'll be glad to take a break for a while." Stephen said, watching Jordan with a smile.

"How's your love life?" She asked.

Stephen rolled his eyes and gave an exasperated sigh. "What love life? When would I have any time to find anyone, anyhow?"

"Well, one never knows," she said with a laugh, toying with a lock of hair. "We have to find you someone, honey. Everyone needs someone to cuddle."

"Ah, don't I wish!" Stephen said with a sigh. He looked moodily out at the river. The sky was grey, the clouds overhead beginning to reflect his mood. He hated when his sister started on this track, since it pointed out to him the fact that he was so alone at times.

"I'm sorry, honey. I just want to see you happy." She said seriously, aware that he hated these conversations. He tried to shake off his mood and smiled wanly at his sister.

"I know. So do I. Maybe someday...." He trailed off.

"Well, someday better come sooner than later," she said, shaking her finger at him. "Because you need someone to take care of you. You certainly aren't capable of doing it yourself!" She poked him in the ribs and he winced. "Now, tell me about this little trip you took to Disney. Who'd you go with?"

"Well, we had a couple of days off and I had a friend who was feeling a bit down. So I arranged to meet him in Paris. Do you remember Eloy? He's in that Dutch group I've told you about." He looked to see if she knew whom he meant. She nodded, waiting patiently for his story. "Well, I told him I'd meet up with him and he was the one who came up with the idea to go to Euro Disney. I really had no idea when I met him where we were headed. We had a blast! I've been there with the lads once but we hardly got to look around at all. This time, I got to see what I wanted! You know, I really have to take you, Jordan and Alan there sometime. Jordan would love it." Stephen said. Michelle noticed how animated he got as he talked about his trip. She was happy that he had someone that he could share that kind of thing with. Lord knew that he didn't get to enjoy himself that often with the pace he kept.

"Eloy is a Disney fan, too?" She asked, watching him intently.

"Yes, he is. That's one of the things we found out we had in common. So it was really great going through all the exhibits and things. The weather wasn't so great, but we made do." He found himself looking away, afraid the sharp eyes of his sister would catch what he left unsaid.

"I'm glad you found time to have fun, love," she said. He couldn't hide much from her and she knew he was leaving a lot of the story out. But she didn't want to push him any more than she had already. Their mother said that everything had its time, and she knew that eventually she'd find the whole story.

"Yeah, Shel, I did." He smiled, lost in his thoughts. Jordan cried out and pointed to the seagulls flying about their heads and he used that as an excuse to get up and walk over to the railing. He was feeling restless and it wasn't something he could put his finger on. Trying to shake it off, he knelt down and peered through the railing along with Jordan. His sister joined them at the railing and leaned against it, letting the wind sweep her hair back.

"What a glorious day!" She exclaimed, watching the sun break through the clouds and shed rays across the south side of the city. Stephen smiled up at her, amused. Jordan tugged on his uncle's sleeve to get his attention. Stephen listened to his chatter, and it helped to break the mood he was in. After a bit, Michelle suggested they continue on since it was getting a bit late and their mother would be making supper. Stephen stood and picking up Jordan, placed him on his shoulders. Gripping the little boy's legs securely, he strolled with his sister while they talked, working their way back to Sheriff Street. She pointed out the new construction in the financial district, as the North Side was now called, telling him some of the stories of the workman's strike over bringing in construction crews from outside the country to work on the buildings. They stopped in a small corner shop when they got to Seville Street and went inside to bring some sweets home for desert.!

Jordan ran around the small shop, looking into every case for just the right thing to buy. Stephen leaned against the counter, watching indulgently while his sister tried to make her son behave.

"Welcome back to the old neighbourhood," the woman behind the counter said. Stephen smiled and thanked her. He complimented her on the amount of treats and bought a bag of Jelly Tots for himself and another for Jordan. Michelle finally picked out a custard that she thought would be fine for the evening meal and he paid for that, also. With a smile and a wave, he hefted the bag of groceries as Michelle took Jordan by the hand and dragged him out of the shop. Jordan was a bit put out since he felt he hadn't fully explored it yet. Stephen leaned down and whispered something that she couldn't hear, and Jordan stopped complaining immediately. She looked enquiringly at her brother, but he just winked and nodded.

The streets were quiet as they walked along, only an occasional child running down the street, making their way home for dinner. The city had a sleepy feeling, the late afternoon sun reflecting off the houses across the street as they strolled along towards home. They turned the corner and Stephen could see a car parked in front of the house. It looked like Mark was over, too. He looked forward to the evening meal when he could have his whole family together. Unconsciously he sped up a bit until his sister complained. Apologising, he slowed down, taking her hand in his.

He reached and opened the door, motioning his sister in. Jordan slipped passed her and shouted for his cousin, since he had also seen the car parked in front of the house. With a chuckle, Stephen closed the door, pulling the lace curtains together as the latch clicked.

Moving to the back of the house, he could hear talking and laughter coming from the kitchen. He blinked as he came out of the dark hallway into the kitchen. His brothers were sitting around the table with their father. Mark's wife Susan was at the sink peeling vegetables. Jordan and Brandon were in the corner and Brandon was showing off his new truck that he had gotten for his birthday. Michelle had gone over to the counter to help their mother and sister in law with getting dinner ready. Stephen waved to his brothers as he moved over to put the bag down. He pulled the custard out, and put it on top of the fridge for later. His mother shooed him out of the way. He wandered over to where his nephews were sitting and Brandon jumped up to give him a hug. Admiring the new truck, he then left them to their play as he wandered around the small kitchen. Mark nodded to him, but kept on talking with his father about the latest construction job he was working on. His!

other brother Alan was engrossed with reading the paper and hadn't heard them come in.

Stephen took the opportunity to slip upstairs to his room. Tony was in the parlor, talking on the phone with some friend of his, so it would be a good time for him to go through his suitcase and get all the presents out. He climbed the stairs, hopping over some discarded shoes at the top. He made his way down the hall and then slipped into the bedroom. Closing the door softly, he pulled the suitcase onto the bed with a grunt. Lord, but it was heavy! Working at the sticky catch, he finally got the lock undone. With a sigh of satisfaction, he opened the suitcase and pulled the bags out from in between the clothes, where he had put them to keep them safe. For his mother, he had found a delicate hand blown sun catcher that she could put in the window. It was in the shape of an angel praying. For his father, he had found a nice book on design in Italy that he thought he might enjoy. Though he worked as a painter, he did do some designing at times and hopefully w! ould appreciate it. Another book was for his brother Alan on writing. Alan was always furiously writing, hoping to get published someday. For Mark, he had gotten a little sextant. Mark had a hobby of making toy boats when he had the spare time, and Stephen thought he would like using that with the boats he sailed. Tony was the easy one. He had had been on some tv show with one of Tony's favorite models, and asked if they would mind signing a picture of two for him. For his nephews, he had gotten them matching cars that they could race with each other. He had gotten his sister in law some lace in Italy for her lacemaking. She did hand tatting, and did a lovely job, so he wanted something she would really appreciate. For his brother in law, he got a book on a German architect that he had heard him mention in the past. For his sister, he pulled out a small box and opened it. Inside was a heart-shaped pendant, tiny jewels glinting along the rim. He had instantly though! t of her when he had seen it in the shop and had bought it without asking the price. Nothing was too good for Michelle.

He heard his mother calling everyone down for dinner. Placing the items in a bag he had, he picked it up and carried it downstairs. The kitchen seemed crowded with the whole family taking places around the table. His mother had put the extra leaf in to extend it, as they always had to do when the whole family was home, and had gotten Tony to borrow a couple of chairs from the next door neighbours so they could all sit down. He sat in the chair in the middle and pulled Jordan into his lap. There weren't enough chairs for the kids, so Brandon sat in Mark's lap as they waited for their mother to bring the meal out of the oven. Jordan squirmed impatiently and Stephen wrapped his arm around the little boy's waist so he couldn't jump down and get underfoot.

"How are you, Stephen?" Mark asked, dealing with an equally impatient Brandon.

"Not too bad. Glad to be home," Stephen smiled. He winked at his sister in law and she smiled back at him. His sister placed a large bowl of mashed potatoes on the table and green beans at the other end. Helping her mother with the roast pork, they placed the platter in front of their father. Then they went around filling glasses as he cut the roast, placing slices on everyone's plates. By the time he was done, Michelle and her mother had also sat down.

"Tony, please say grace," Martin said, looking down the table to his youngest. Tony crossed himself, followed by everyone else and said grace, thanking the Lord for the food and family and for bringing his brother back home safely again. Stephen sat with his head bowed, silently sending his own prayer of thanks up to heaven for such a fine family.

"Amen," Tony said, echoed by everyone else. The moment of silence was short lived as everyone began talking again, passing bowls of food around and chatting. Stephen dished out Jordan's portion and cut the roast pork into small pieces so he could eat it. Digging into his own meal, he found himself famished, as if he hadn't just had a huge breakfast that morning. Mark and Alan asked him questions about the tour and where he had been. But for the most part, he was content to sit back and let everyone talk around him. It was so good to be home! He missed these times something fierce when he was on the road.

At the end of the meal Michelle and Susan cleared off everyone's plates from the table and brought the custard out on plates. Jordan wasn't interested and took his bag of Jelly Tots off to share with his cousin. Stephen handed out his gifts for everyone, pleased with their exclamations of surprise. From his mother's "Oh, you didn't have to do that! But isn't she lovely!" to his sister's gasp of surprise at the necklace, he savored every moment. They relaxed after the meal, telling stories and enjoying their family time together.

Not long afterwards, he found himself yawning, and looking at the clock on the wall, realized how late it had gotten. His mother shooed him off to bed, and after telling everyone goodnight, he climbed the stairs. Michelle had already put Jordan and Brandon to bed on the sofa in the parlor, and the two boys were fast asleep while the adults talked on into the night. Tony had gone out to spend some time with his friends. He went into the bathroom to brush his teeth and absently reflected back on the day. He wanted to hold onto days like this, because they came so seldom. And for him, it seemed as if the day had flown. Taking off his shirt, he washed up, running his wet hands through his hair to tame it. With a sigh, he picked up his things and walked into the bedroom. He had just gotten undressed and into bed when there was a knock on the door and his sister peered in.

"Ready for bed?" She asked softly as she stepping into the tiny room.

"More than ready," he said tiredly. She sat down at the edge of the bed and smoothed his hair back from his face. He smiled up at her as they both remembered times in the past when she had done that before. "You heading home?"

"Just about. Wanted to come up and say goodnight. And to thank you again for this lovely necklace." She fingered the light filigree chain and caressed the heart that lay against her chest. "You really shouldn't have, though. It's much too dear."

"Shel, what else do I have to do with my money?" He asked seriously. "Nothing pleases me more than seeing you all happy. And I get little enough chance to see any of you, anyhow."

Her face softened into a smile. "I know, sweetie. And I know how much you hate that. But hopefully soon you can take a break for a bit. Who knows? Maybe I'll find you someone special to go out with."

"Oh please, Shel!" He protested, laughing. "No matchmaking, thanks! Can you imagine it? Oh, my heart couldn't take the press! No, if and when it ever happens, I know it has to be the one I'm going to spend the rest of my life with before I put myself through something like that."

"Well, he's out there, honey. I just feel it in my bones. It's just a matter of you two finding each other. And I'm sure you will." She gently caressed his cheek, smiling.

"Ah, I hope so!" Stephen said fervently, closing his eyes. "Shel, sometimes it gets so lonely on the road. I see Keith with Lisa, and now Ro with this girl of his and I just wish that once... just once, I could have someone all my own." He opened his eyes again to stare up at his sister. "I just want someone to love, too."

Her eyes filled with tears at the pain in his voice. "Oh, honey, you will. You just have to be patient is all. I know that there's someone out there for you, just waiting for you to love him. And it will happen." She gave him a tight hug and he wrapped his arms around her. With a sigh, she pulled back, wiping a tear from her eye. "Now look at what you've made me do! I'm going to look a fright!" she laughed shakily.

"Never, Shel. You are always beautiful to me. Now get going before Alan comes looking for you." He pushed at her and she gave him a kiss on the cheek as she got up.

"Goodnight," she said from the door. "Sleep tight."

"Night, Shel. I love you," Stephen said.

"Love you too, honey. I'll talk to you tomorrow." She slipped out the door, closing it silently behind her. He could hear the creaking of the stairs as she made her way down them and Alan softly asking why she looked so upset. She murmured something she couldn't hear and he heard the door close down below. The sounds of his brothers talking with their parents went on and he folded his arms beneath his head, staring at the ceiling. Though he was tired, sleep eluded him at the moment. His head whirled with thoughts about what Michelle had said and he truly did wonder if he'd ever find that special someone to share his life with.

He rolled over on his side and stared at the streetlight reflecting off the posters on the wall. He knew he had found that special person. The question was, would he ever know if what he felt was reciprocated? Sighing, he closed his eyes, but visions of a smiling face with brown eyes danced behind his lids, and he knew that sleep would be a long time in coming for him this night. He lay back wondering where Eloy was, and whether he was alone, or with someone. He hoped alone, because he knew he couldn't stand the thought of Eloy being with someone else. Resolutely, he turned his thoughts to something else, but his thoughts kept wandering back to their weekend together, and making love. Tears crept out of the corner of his eyes and he curled up wrapping his arms around himself. He pretended to himself that it was Eloy holding him like that and eventually he drifted off to sleep.

Next: Chapter 10


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