Disclaimer:
If you've gotten this far, you know that it is the twenty fourth chapter in an on-going series. At the risk of repeating myself, I have neither relationship with either Stephen Gately or Eloy de Jong, nor the groups Boyzone or Caught in the Act. This story is a complete work of fiction and purely created within the writer's imagination.
I have been enjoying the comments I have been getting and would love to hear what you think. Please write.
Cheers,
Musicfan
Stephen let the hotel room door close behind him and he went over to pick up the phone next to the bed. Kicking off his shoes, he dialed his sister's number and sat down. It ran briefly before she picked up.
"Hey hon, it's me." He said, shimmying out of his shirt while he talked.
"Why hello Me. How are you?" Michelle asked with a hint of a laugh in her voice. She was sitting on the loveseat in her parlour watching the telly when the phone rang. She lowered the volume with the remote so she could hear Stephen better.
"Good. How are things back home?" Stephen asked. He sat down on the bed in his t-shirt and jeans. He kicked off his socks and propped himself up against the headboard so he was comfortable.
"Great. No one's burned down the house or anything," Michelle said with a laugh. She smiled as Alan came in with a cup of tea for her. He looked inquiringly at her until she mouthed Stephen's name. Knowing she'd probably be a while he nodded and went back to his newspaper in the other room. "How'd it go today?"
"Fantastic. We got right into the groove with everything. I really like the songs we're working on right now. This looks like it's going to be a great album. And Louis was talking to us this morning about working with some other studios, to change the sound, you know? We might end up in New York, which I think would be cool." He stretched out his legs and buried his toes in the covers. It felt so good to be off his feet.
Stephen's enthusiasm brought a smile to Michelle's face. He really sounded upbeat about it, which was good. "Oh, that's grand, honey. But does that mean that you're going to be working so hard that I don't get to see you at all?"
"Ah, you will, Shel. We were just talking today about making sure we get some time off so we don't get run down. That last promo and tour schedule was insane. Nothing like that again, I promise." Stephen said with a heartfelt sigh.
"Good to hear. Though I'm sure you'd rather be with your friends than come home when you get a chance." Michelle debated on whether to come and just ask Stephen what was going on. She was still dying of curiosity. "Are you still visiting with your friend Eloy?"
"No, he went back to Holland already." Stephen said. He wasn't paying attention as a stray melody floated around in his head and he reached for the hotel pad to jot it down. It felt like the lyrics he had worked on with Steve Mac, and he wanted to keep it in his head for the next time they got together.
"Did you two have fun together?" She asked.
"Yeah, we did. It was great having someone else to chat with and kick around with here." Stephen said. He felt surprised that he was able to talk about Eloy without feeling that gaping emptiness inside that he had had last night.
"Good, I'm glad you had fun." Michelle said. She glanced over into the next room to see if Alan was paying attention to her conversation. When she saw he wasn't, she stirred her tea a bit and debated about how to ask Stephen about how much fun he had had. "Hope you didn't have so much fun that you weren't careful, though."
Stephen nearly dropped the phone. "What?" He asked, not sure he heard her right.
"Stephen, you of all people should know you can't fool me. You went to London early, but you haven't been around any of the times I called you. You didn't sleep in your room. Where were you? You were with him. It's okay, I'm fine with it. I'm even happy for you, that you found someone that you can be with." Michelle said in a rush.
"How'd you know I wasn't in my room?" Stephen blurted without thinking. He winced as soon as he did, because he was basically admitting to what she said.
"Because I called you one night and you didn't pick up." Michelle said with a laugh. "I had a feeling about this friend of yours and had to check a hunch out."
"You did?" Stephen didn't know whether to be mad or not, but settled on an embarrassed laugh. He should have known he wasn't going to keep this one from her for long.
"Mmm hmmm." Michelle said. "So, now that I know... Tell me all about him."
Stephen was at a loss at where to start, or whether he should say anything at all. "Well, there's not much to say." He murmured softly. He shifted uncomfortably on the bed, trying to think of a good reason that he couldn't talk to her anymore.
"Liar," she said smugly. "Is he good in bed?"
"MICHELLE!" Stephen exclaimed. He could feel himself blushing. "I'm not going to answer that!"
"And why not?" She asked reasonably. She took a sip of her tea and rested her head on the back of her chair.
"Like you tell me about how good Alan is in bed!" Stephen retorted.
"He's great." Michelle promptly replied. "Does everything I like. Even that little thing where he..."
"I don't want to hear it!" Stephen interrupted, shocked. "I don't believe I'm having this conversation with you." He could hear Michelle laughing on the other end of the phone. "You're terrible!"
"I am not," she said as she recovered enough to talk. "Honey, I'm just happy you found someone. You have, haven't you?"
Stephen knew he wasn't going to get out of this one without telling her something. And as he thought about it, it was probably better to get it done with over the phone than face to face, when she could see him blushing. "Yeah, I have."
"Ah, that's grand, hon. Tell me more. I've been dying to know since I talked with him the other night. He has a very sexy voice, you know." She said.
Stephen laughed. "Yes, he does. Let's see... what's there to tell?"
"Well, how about at the beginning?" Michelle suggested.
Stephen thought about it, trying to think of how he could edit around the story for his sister to be satisfied without telling her too much. "Well, I think I've always been interested in him. He's quite good looking. And ever since we met, we always hit it off together. He was in a relationship, but finally broke up earlier this year. It's always been rocky, even at the best of times. And I guess all the traveling and being on the road was a big part of the problem. Finally Eloy realized it was both tearing them apart, and he broke it off. Though he knew it was the right thing to do, he was pretty torn up about it. So I suggested we meet up, hoping to distract him. That's when we got together and went to Disney. He was feeling down and I thought I'd use my break to cheer him up." Stephen said. He was toying with the telephone cord as he thought back to that fateful weekend. "Well, in the process, we both surprised ourselves."
"Oh?" Was all Michelle said as she waited for her brother to continue.
"Well, we were horsing around and the next thing I knew, we were kissing." Stephen paused, his eyes closed. It felt good to tell someone about what had happened. For the longest time, he had wondered if it really had happened. "It kind of progressed from there."
"I imagine so. And then what happened?" Michelle asked.
"Well, after that weekend, I went back on tour and he went home to work on an album with his group. I think we were both pretty confused, since neither of us had expected anything like that to happen. But I realized that the longer we were apart that the more I wanted to see him. But with him just coming off a relationship, I didn't want to push him. So I started writing notes, like to the ones I sent to you and the boys. Keeping in touch without pushing. Apparently it worked, because he called me up and wanted to get together." Stephen glossed over the months of angst he had gone through in the waiting process. "That's when we met this week. Originally he was coming over for just a night, because I was going into the studio, but then it got pushed back because the engineer wasn't available. So we met up here in London."
"And?" She asked, trying to keep the eagerness out of her voice. She wasn't about to berate him for not telling her any of what had happened when he had been home before. She had known something was up, but hadn't realized what kind of turmoil he had probably been going through. Suddenly, his moody silences when they had talked made a lot of sense.
"And..." Stephen paused as he thought over the past week. "And we met up. He told me that he had been thinking a lot over what had happened, and about me. And then --- he told me he had fallen in love with me." Stephen felt a warm glow as he said the words. He could hear his sister sigh when he said that. She was such a romantic.
"And what did you say to that?" She asked, a bit breathless.
"Honestly?" He said, laughing a little. "I couldn't get a word out."
"Oh no!" She exclaimed. "What did you do?"
"I think I lost my voice. I couldn't even get a squeak out." Stephen said, remembering. "Finally I had to get up and go over to him. Poor man wouldn't even look at me, he was so afraid I was going to reject him. As if I would! God, he's gorgeous, Shel. You know, the first time I saw him, I thought he was the one for me. When I found out he was with someone, I figured that was it. And when we got to be good friends I realized how much we had in common. So I think there was this little bit inside of me that kept on hoping that one day, maybe it would work out. He's the one, Shel. The one I've been waiting for all my life."
"Oh honey, that's wonderful." Michelle said. "I'm so happy for you both. And I'll forgive you in advance if it means you'd rather go visit him than come home for a visit with me."
"We're still working things out," Stephen said. "And we know it's going to be hard. Hell, it's not like either of us can go anywhere without being noticed, so we're going to have to be careful. But we're going to make this work. I can't go back. Just having him leave yesterday was like losing a part of my soul." He paused and closed his eyes, not wanting to get choked up about it.
"Well, if you need a place to meet, just let me know. I can arrange something here. That way it won't look strange for you to come home and you can meet him here." Michelle said, already making plans.
"Thanks, Shel. For listening, and for being so willing to help out." Stephen said softly. She was the best.
"Stephen, I'm just happy for you. That you've found someone that you can love, and who loves you back. You don't know how long I've been hoping that this day would come, hon. And if there is anything I can do to help on this end, please let me know." She said earnestly.
"You're a love, you know that?" Stephen said. "I'll keep that in mind. Who knows, maybe I'll take you up on that offer."
"You do that, sweetie," she said. "Now, do the rest of the guys know anything yet?"
"Well, Ro knows a lot, but not who. I think Shane has a good idea something's up, but I haven't talked to him about it yet. As for the others, no. Not yet." Stephen said.
"I'm sure they'd be willing to help you out if you ask, too." Michelle said positively.
"Yeah, maybe. I don't want to drag them into this, though. Its something I have to do for myself, you know? But we've already talked to Louis about getting time off. Once we get the schedule set up, I'll probably go to Holland to visit with Eloy. I'm a bit excited about it all. He's told me so much about his family, and his mother has been asking to meet me. Shel, this feels so damn good. I can't really explain it."
"I know, hon. You're in love. That's lovely." She said softly. A noise made her look up and she saw Jordan standing at the top of the stairs. "Jordie, what are you doing up? Back to bed with you."
Stephen glanced down at his watch and saw how much time had passed. "Poor lad, can't sleep? I better let you go hon. I promised I'd give Eloy a call, and he's an hour ahead."
"All right," she said, distracted. "I'll let you go. But you give me a call when you know more, Stephen! Keep me up to date and all!"
"I will. Love you." He said, preparing to ring off.
"Love you right back. Good night, sweetie." Michelle said.
Stephen sat for a moment with his finger on the hook before lifting it and dialing Eloy's number. It rang a few times and he began to get nervous that he had waited too late.
"Hallo?" a deep voice answered and he relaxed as he recognized Eloy's voice.
"Hey babe." Stephen said, smiling into the phone. "Sorry I'm late."
"Nah, it's okay. I was just up on the deck and had to climb down to get the phone. Did you have a good dinner with Ronan?" Eloy poured himself a glass of wine and carried both it and the cordless phone back up to the deck. It was beautiful out and he had been enjoying the evening up on the roof.
"Yeah, it was good." Stephen paused for a moment as he listened to Eloy sigh. "What're you doing?"
"Just going back up to the deck. It's lovely tonight. The stars are out." Eloy said as he leaned back in his chair and stared up at the sky.
"Damn, wish I could be there with you," Stephen said softly. He closed his eyes and tried to envision Eloy sitting up on the rooftop somewhere in Amsterdam.
"So do I, lover." Eloy said in the same tone. Stephen felt himself grow warm at the endearment and he smiled.
"Well, with luck, it will be soon." Stephen said positively. "We talked with Louis this morning and we're working out the schedule for some breaks. Hopefully I'll know more in a day or two."
"Goed," Eloy said, happy to hear that Stephen was feeling so upbeat. "How did your day go in the studio?" He stretched out his legs onto the stool next to the chair and leaned back to look up at the stars while he listened to Stephen talking.
"Excellent! We got off to a good start. Got some tracks down, though we'll have to record some more on the backing vocals. But I'm really happy with the way things got started today. There's a chance we might go to either Cheiron or The Loft or Record Plant in New York. I have to admit I'm a bit excited about that, because working with different people will be good for the music. But all that traveling is going to be a bit much." Stephen found himself just babbling along, eager to share his day with Eloy.
"That's an excellent opportunity," Eloy said encouragingly. "I've worked at Cheiron. They've got great people there. And going to New York would be fabulous, Stephen. Maybe you can make it into the States that way, with one of those producers behind you all."
"Well, who knows if it will even happen," Stephen said offhandedly. "But it's nice to think about. How was your day?"
"Nice. I had lunch with Mama and Luci, which was wonderful. We had ourselves a grand old time chatting and catching up. They were eager to hear about my trip," Eloy said with a grin.
"Oh?" Stephen asked. "And what did you tell them?" He felt a shiver of anticipation.
"Oh, not much. Just that I found the man of my dreams and that I want to spend the rest of my life with him." Eloy said.
"Hmmm, this man anyone I know?" Stephen asked with a silly grin on his face.
"Maybe," Eloy said, a chuckle rumbling through him. "They are both thrilled, and are dying to meet you. I do hope you all work out the schedule soon so you can come out here for a visit and meet them."
"I'd really like that, Eloy. From what you told me, they're both lovely. And E?" Stephen said.
"Ja?" Eloy asked as he sipped at his glass of wine.
"I told Michelle about us tonight." Stephen said quietly.
"Ja? And what did she say?" Eloy asked.
"Actually, she guessed before I told her." Stephen said with a laugh. "Do you know what she did? She called one of the nights we were together and when she didn't get an answer, put two and two together and figured where I was. Asked me if you were good in bed."
Eloy roared with laughter. "And what did you tell her?"
"I was shocked, actually. Asked her if I would ever ask her about her and Alan. Then she proceeded to tell me! Christ, like I need to know what my sister likes to do in bed!" Stephen could feel himself blushing as he remembered the conversation. "We were soon off of that part, but it was a close one."
"I can't wait to meet her. She sounds hysterical." Eloy said. He could imagine Stephen's reaction to her question and he held back another chuckle. He knew how shy Stephen could get, and the last thing he'd want to do was talk to his older sister about his sex life.
"Oh, a barrel of laughs. Usually at my expense," Stephen said wryly. "Anyhow, she wheedled some of the details out of me and then promptly offered to help us if we needed it."
"Really?" Eloy asked. "How so?"
"Well, I said that we knew it was going to be difficult, but that together we were going to make this work. But that doing so without being recognized was going to be hard." Stephen got up, went over to his mini-bar and pulled out a can of soda. He made his way back to the bed and shucked out of the rest of his clothes. "She suggested that we meet in Ireland and that she'd set something up. That way it wouldn't look suspicious for me to go home and you could be there when I get there."
"It's a good idea, actually," Eloy said thoughtfully. "Plus, she gets to watch."
"Eloy!" Stephen exclaimed over Eloy's laughter. "You're just as bad as she is! I can't believe you said that!" Eloy didn't respond for a couple of minutes because he was too busy laughing to say anything. Stephen shook his head ruefully, wondering what he had let himself in for. Between his sister and Eloy, they were bound to give him a heart attack sooner or later. He had to chuckle though, because Eloy's laughter was so infectious.
"Well, we'll figure it out once we know what your schedule is," Eloy said when he could finally speak again. "I'm sorry, I couldn't resist."
"Yeah, right." Stephen said, a doubtful tone in his voice. "Try a little harder next time." That set Eloy off again and Stephen rolled his eyes, but he had a huge grin on his face at the same time.
Eventually Eloy calmed down again. "You getting ready for bed?" He asked. The wine was making him sleepy as he sat in his chair up on the deck.
"Already there," Stephen said. "I got out of my clothes as soon as I got in the room."
"Oh my, what an image that presents to me." Eloy said in a low voice. "You trying to tease me, zusje?"
"Never, hon," Stephen said softly. "Believe me, the last thing I want to do is frustrate either of us."
"I know," Eloy replied with a sigh. "Damn, I can see you so clearly now. You on top of the covers?"
"I am," Stephen said with a smile. "Just me in my all together. How about you?"
"Feeling entirely overdressed right now," Eloy said uncomfortably. "Damn. I think I need to remedy that." He pulled at his jeans to relieve the pressure against him.
"I'm sorry," Stephen said. "We better not continue this or its going to get a lot more uncomfortable." He was getting an erection from the way Eloy was talking to him and knew that they were both going to be pretty frustrated if they kept on in this vein much longer.
"Or," Eloy said in a gravelly voice. "We can keep it up and take it further. Which would you like, babe?" Stephen closed his eyes at the raw tone of Eloy's voice.
"Shit, Eloy." Stephen rasped. "I can't." The sound of Eloy breathing harshly in his ear was turning him on. "I've never done this before."
"First time for everything. Just close your eyes, Stephen." Eloy said, his voice low. "Feel me touching you."
"Eloy, don't." Stephen begged. "I can't do this."
"Why not? I'm right there with you, baby. I've got my arms around you. I'm touching you right now. Can't you feel me caressing your face?" Eloy had his eyes closed as he envisioned what he was saying. He could picture Stephen lying in the bed with himself crouched low over him. "Turn off the light, Stephen."
Stephen found himself trembling. "E..."
"Shhhh," Eloy said, his voice dropping lower. "Turn off the light, vrijster. I'm running my fingers down your chest now. Oooh, it feels so good."
"Eloy, please." Stephen said in a tiny voice, losing the battle. He could almost feel Eloy touching him and he shivered. "Please don't."
"Can't stop now," Eloy whispered softly in his ear. "I'm just getting to the interesting part."
"I..." Stephen cried softly, still trying to voice a protest.
"Stil," Eloy murmured softly, his voice a low rumble in Stephen's ear. "Stil... hush, honing. Let me love you." He ached with the need to hold Stephen in his arms, and settled for a mental image with a small sigh.
"No, this is going to make it worse. I -- I can't baby. I really can't." Stephen begged. He couldn't let this continue. It would rip apart the fragile peace he had built for himself today, and he really couldn't go through what he had over the past few months, yearning so much and hurting at being alone. In some ways, this would be worse, he thought to himself.
The tone of panic in Stephen's voice finally got through to Eloy and he stopped. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "Damn, I'm so sorry I had to come back."
"So am I," Stephen replied softly. They sat in silence for a moment, each lost in his own thoughts. "And I'm sorry I can't do what you want, Eloy. But I think it's better for both of us if we don't go down that road."
"Ja, you're probably right," Eloy said with a resigned sigh. "But damn, zusje, I miss you so much right now. Please hurry up and get your schedule straightened out as soon as you can. And I'll do what I have to on my end to free up for when you can come over."
"Yeah, I'll work on it," Stephen promised. "You don't know how much I need to get this straightened out. I need you so damn much." His voice quavered on the last words and he leaned his head back against the wall. He really didn't want to fall apart over the phone right now.
Eloy was silent for a moment. "Babe, do me a favour?"
"What's that?" Stephen said softly.
"Turn off the light and get under the covers," Eloy said. "No, I'm not going back to that. But please do it."
Stephen sighed. "All right." He reached over and turned off the lamp and then crawled under the duvet. He shivered slightly as the cold sheets touched him. "Light's off."
"You all wrapped up?" Eloy asked.
"Yeah, I am." Stephen said, resting his cheek on the pillow.
"Okay, imagine this. I'm going to wrap my arms around you. How's that feel?" Eloy asked, his voice a mere whisper in Stephen's ear.
"I feel it," Stephen said softly. "It feels nice."
"I'm going to imagine myself holding you all night long. I can't think of anything better than that, can you?" Eloy said.
"No," Stephen whispered back. "I guess this will do for now. I love you."
"I love you, too, babe. Don't ever forget that. Now, it's getting late. I'm going to let you get some sleep. You have another busy day tomorrow."
"What are you doing tomorrow?" Stephen asked sleepily.
"Got a photo shoot with the lads for the new album, then some planning for the release. Enough to keep me busy," Eloy replied.
"Sounds like fun," Stephen murmured.
"Not really," Eloy said with a chuckle. "But it's something to do. I should let you get to sleep, so I'm going to say goodnight now. Sleep tight, kindje."
"Mmmm, I don't want to hang up though." Stephen said. "I love listening to you."
"And I love talking with you, baby. But if we don't hang up soon, the sun will be coming up and neither of us will be able to face working." Eloy said. "So it's probably best if we say goodnight now."
"I suppose," Stephen said. "Are you going to be able to sleep?"
"Ja, I will. I'm just going to think of you in my arms and I'll drift right off, thinking that." Eloy replied. "Love you."
"Love you right back, baby." Stephen whispered. "Go get some rest, love. I'll talk to you tomorrow."
After they had rung off, Stephen lay in the dark with the phone still cradled against his cheek. It was only once it started making that noise that it had been off the hook too long that he placed it back on the cradle. It was quiet in the hotel room as he burrowed back under the covers. He closed his eyes tightly, trying to recapture that feeling of Eloy wrapping his arms around him.
After a half hour or so of laying alone in the dark, he sighed and rolled over to turn on the lamp again. It wasn't working. He could hear every noise out in the hallway. Keith and Shane had come in not too long ago, laughing their butts off as they headed to their rooms. He wanted to get up and open the door, but he stayed in bed. Running to Keith wasn't the answer tonight. He rolled over restlessly and stared at the phone. The piece of paper where he had jotted the note down caught his attention and he sat up and grabbed it. With a sigh he spread it out over the covers and looked at it again. The melody ran through his head again and he added a couple of lines. Obviously he wasn't going to get any sleep this night.
Eloy lay in his bed, hands propped behind his head. His mind raced over the details of the last week, his conversation with Stephen running through his head. Despite his comment to Stephen, he found he couldn't sleep. He rolled over to his side and stared across his empty bed.
" Oh, op welke manier mij ben zoek u wel, zusje.." He whispered into the dark. It was a lot harder tonight than it had been last night. He wondered why it would seem so different, but couldn't come up with any explanation. He closed his eyes, trying to picture Stephen lying next to him. Eventually he pulled the other pillow into his arms and hugged it tight. But sleep eluded him for a long time that night.