WHAT MAKES A FAMILY BY: Julien
This story is 100% fictional and is by no means depictive of the life of any person, place or thing. It contains sexual activities between males and should only be read if it is legal to do so in your area. Read at your own risk and enjoy. Comments are welcomed at juniorj009@gmail.com and would be very much appreciated. ENJOY!
This will be a short mini series of sort. Comments are always appreciated. Thanks. J.
CHAPTER 1
It seemed to me that the pink walls of the small classroom seemed to serve only one purpose, that purpose being to amplify the silence that had crept up on us so suddenly. And my only thought was this, `at least in the car, we were speaking, even if it was another disagreement'. I refused to call it an argument as that would denote that there was a problem with our relationship. We may have been going through a rough period of time but that most definitely did not mean that there was something wrong with our relationship. The opening of the classroom door drowned out all of my thoughts and I looked up to see our son's teacher entering the room with an arm full of books, papers, and a dreadfully tattered manila folder. Before I could get up and offer her assistance, James did it for me, taking two long strides towards her and without a word, relieving her of her load.
"Thanks." she exclaimed in an exasperated breath sending a grateful smile his way. I watched with envy as he returned the favor, his eyes lighting up and the corners of his mouth twitching before he let the words `no problem', slip out. It had been a while since such a joyous reaction had been sent my way. But that in no way, shape or form meant that we were having problems. We were just going through a rough time. I watched as he placed the books unto her desk and pulled the ratty, wooden chair out for her. She once again looked up at him with what I could only describe as admiration and thanked him again. I was almost tempted to roll my eyes but stopped short of turning thought into reality as he cast a glance of displeasure my way.
"Ok Gentlemen, let me just say that I'm glad that both of you could come to this emergency conference. I know that you both work and are probably very busy."
When neither of us responded, she continued,
"I requested that both of you come because I think the issues that need to be addressed concerns your entire family." She lifted the manila folder from her desk and flipped it open, briefly scanning over what I assumed to be David's file. I looked over at James to see what reaction, if any, he was having to this entire situation, and was disappointed but not surprised to see him staring straight ahead, unflinching and unreadable. He wasn't always like that, mind you. Usually, he was all smiles from ear to ear but lately, things had been different, and the fact that we both had to be here to discuss the `situation with David' was probably just another thing in a line of things that did nothing to help his mood.
"Let me just get to the reason why I called you here. David is a good student, in fact, he's in the top ten percent of my class that score the highest on grade tests. He's smart and academically, he's fine. But it's not his academics that worry me, it's his behavior. This week alone, David has been in five fights."
At this point in time I was shell shocked to hear any of this. David had been home every evening scratch free and had neither mentioned any altercations he had been in at school or the fact that this was a frequent occurrence.
"Kids have fights all the time Ms. Morgan. David is sixteen. He's going to have fights every now and again. I know I did at his age. And besides, David relayed to me the circumstances under which they happened. If some kid is harassing him, I wouldn't be a good father if I got upset at him for defending himself." James words came out as nonchalant as if the conversation had been about the weather. And it annoyed me to no end that he was so in control of his emotions when all I wanted to do was scream `what the hell is going on!' David had neither approached me, his biological father, nor had he hinted in the least that something was amiss at school. And my partner of the last twelve years saw it neither fit nor suitable to fill me in on matters concerning my own son.
"I understand where you're coming from Mr. Wilson but the fact of the matter is that David's behavior is unacceptable and the school will not tolerate it. He's on the verge of being suspended and they are suggesting placing him in a special education setting..."
"He doesn't need a special education setting Ms Morgan. You yourself said that David was as smart as a whip."
"And he is Mr. Wilson but the fact remains that no matter how smart he is, if his behavior continues, we'll have no choice but to suspend and maybe expel."
I sighed audible and covered my eyes with my hand. I had to speak up and let her know the type of kid that my son was, I just had to and so I did,
"David's a good kid Ms Morgan, please, he really is. He just doesn't do the things you claim he does. David doesn't even know how to fight. I remember when he was ten, we took him to one of those WWF matches and he couldn't even bring himself to watch it. Now what kid who can't stomach play fighting would actually put himself in a situation where he would have to fight." I was pleading for my son's innocence as if his life literally depended on it. This wasn't David, this wasn't my David. Not the David that I raised from birth.
"I understand your frustration Mr. Stewart and as a parent myself, I know it's hard to imagine our kids doing things that we don't expect from them. But we have proof, witnesses, and David's own words stating that the fight happened. There's no denying that." She lowered her eyes as she delivered those damning words and only raised them to briefly look at us through sympathetic eyes.
James pulled himself back out of his seat and began pacing the room, a nervous habit he had picked up while serving in the military.
"What can we do? I mean it sounds as if the school has already made up their minds about punishment for David. There doesn't seem to be that many options open to us Ms Morgan."
"But there is," she stated, following James' example and getting up from her seat. "David has been seeing our counselor for about a week now and he has not yet begun opening up to her as of yet. He doesn't speak about the things that bother him but through his actions, she tells me that she feels the cause of all of this might be due to a recent stressful event. If you could just give me an idea of what David's home life is like, maybe we can narrow down the list of possible triggers for his behavior."
James sighed and again seated himself before beginning to speak, "I mean he does what any normal sixteen year old does. He gets upset when we set a curfew, he plays all that rock and rap crap way too loud. He likes to watch television. He's into soccer and he likes to watch baseball. I mean I don't know what you expect me to say Ms Morgan. Just because David has two male figures in his life, it doesn't mean that his home life is any different. I've helped raised David since he was four years old and he's had twelve years to adjust to my being there."
"I'm not suggesting that David having two fathers is the reason for his behavior Mr. Morgan. This school, its faculty and student body is more than accepting of alternative family lifestyles. In fact, at least ten to fifteen percent of our student body lives in a family unit that is not nuclear. All I'm asking is for the both of you to just think about any recent changes in David's life, big changes that have happened. Has there been a death in the family, a big move..."
"A divorce." His voice and those words brought a halt to the conversation. I hadn't heard him use that phrase since last month and hearing it again, only managed to make me weak in the knees.
"We're getting a divorce. I told David last month that we were breaking up. He seemed to have taken it alright. I mean it wasn't as if I were moving out of state. He'd still be able to visit me whenever he wanted. I didn't think it would affect him this much."
Looking at her I saw that her sympathetic look had been replaced with a look of pity, and I wanted nothing more than to wipe that look off of her face and out of my mind.
"It's just a separation," I piped in "we're just going through a rough patch, we'll work it out. David knows that couples sometimes have disagreements. That's all it is, a disagreement."
"Neil." James started and stopped as I cast him the most unnerving look I could muster up. It seemed to have worked for he clamped his mouth shut and let me finish.
"David is a good kid Ms Morgan and he has a good home life. He has two parents who love him and an extended family that welcomes him. He has a lot of friends and according to you, he's a smart kid. Kids go through phases and that is what this is, a phase. And like any other phase, David will overcome it. James and I are working on our issues and soon, things will be back to the way they were. We appreciate you calling us up and sharing your concerns but everything is fine. We're fine and David will be fine." I didn't give her time to protest as I stood up and grabbed my coat from the back of the chair. James followed suit and in no time, we were dressed and ready to go. Looking over at her, I saw that a solemn expression adorned her face, a look that suggested to me that she thought she hadn't accomplished much. But truth be told, she did. She gave James a reason to work with me, to work out our issues, if not for our relationship, then for the good of our son.
"You just don't get it, do you." His words pierced the peace and quiet that had enveloped us as we drove home. I knew where this was leading and I wasn't ready to deal with this as of yet so I did the only thing that I could think of, I turned the spotlight back on him.
"Why didn't you tell me that David had been fighting? I have a right to know these things James." My voice was calm but beneath the surface, my anger was simmering.
"David was supposed to tell you. He told me he would tell you. I had no reason to think he would lie to me."
"Well you should have told me anyway. It seems that as of late, you purposely go out of your way to alienate me from my son. He used to tell me everything."
At a stoplight, he turned to look at me, "What the hell are you trying to insinuate Neil! I've been a father to that boy as much as you have so don't try to turn your shit on me just because he's not as close to you as you'd like to think. David's' growing up and it's like you still expect him to like the things he used to like as a kid. He's a young man now Neil and he's looking for a father who can be a father, not a father who wants be to be his best friend. Listen, it's not that David doesn't love you, cause he does, it's just that he needs some space and all you want to do is smother him."
And I couldn't help but deliver a low blow, "I'm sure you'd know all there is to know about space. And where do you get off telling me what my son needs. You don't give a damn about what David needs." It seemed that the more I spoke, the more venomous my words got.
"How the fuck can you sit there and say that, huh. I've been there for that kid for twelve years. He's practically my son and..."
I cut him off before he could continue and it was as if a month of frustration had finally spilled over, "He's not your son James. HE IS NOT YOUR SON! You don't give a damn about David for if you did, you would not be spewing shit like `we're getting a divorce' from your mouth".
He started to say something and then stopped. A smile neither pleasant nor welcoming graced his face, "so that's what it's all about huh. If it isn't about us, it doesn't really matter, huh Neil. You can just save your bullshit self righteous speeches for someone else cause I'm not gonna go through this with you. I'm leaving you and this relationship whether you choose to accept it or not but that does not mean that I am leaving David. He's my son too and I'm going to be there for him..."
"Over my dead body. You think I don't see your plan James. Leave me, take my son, poison his mind against me and then run off with your new boyfriend. I'm not going to let you fuck with David the way you fucked with me." The look on his face at that moment was one of shock mixed in with something else, anger maybe. He pulled the car into the driveway, turned off the ignition and got out of the car, slamming the door shut before stomping up the walkway. I waited a few minutes before getting out of the car and joining him in the house.
I found both him and David emerged in a heated discussion in the kitchen. I couldn't make out what they were saying but from their body language, I guessed that it must have had something to do with the meeting at school. As I got closer, the conversation became clearer.
"I can't believe you would lie to me David! I trusted you. You said you would tell your dad."
"I didn't lie! I was gonna tell him!"
"When!"
"I don't know. What does it matter. He doesn't give a damn about me. I could have told him and he wouldn't have noticed the difference. All he cares about is himself."
"That's not true and you know it." James responded in a more calm voice. "Your dad loves you very much."
"Not as much as he loves you." I was shocked to hear that response coming from my son. I loved David more than life itself and for him to think that I didn't care was just unacceptable. I made my presence known by coughing loudly before walking through the swing doors that led into the kitchen. As I entered, David tried to leave but before he could even take that first step, James gently grabbed his arm and held him in place.
"Let me go dammit!" He screamed, trying his hardest to pry James' hand from around his arm.
"No, you have a problem David and we're gonna discuss it now." James stated sternly.
"I don't have a fucking problem!"
"You're already in enough trouble as it is David, so calm down." I could tell from the rising bulge in his neck that James was getting frustrated with David's attitude and truth be told, so was I.
"You're not my father so step the fuck off!" And with that declaration, David pulled his hand from James' grasp, ran out of the kitchen and out the front door. Turning to James, I saw the shell shocked look that adorned his face and tried to comfort him, despite the fact that I had said the same thing to him only moments before.
"He didn't mean it babe." And with that, I tried to put my hand unto his shoulder, only to have him shrug it off.
"Yeah, he did and so did you. I'm just gonna get my stuff and get out of here." he stated, heading for the kitchen.
"James don't go, please. Please, stay and let us talk about this." But for all my pleading, those words fell on deaf ears. I watched from the sidelines helplessly as he threw a suitcase unto the bed and began placing pieces of clothing into it.
"So that's it, huh. After twelve years you're just going to walk out on us, your family. What did I ever do James to deserve this?" My voice had begun to crack and the words refused to come out in one smooth sentence. He turned to look at me and I could tell from the look in his eye that some part of him still belonged to me. Maybe it was just a small part but it was still there.
"Neil, don't ok. It's not you, alright, it's me. It's something that I need to do. I love you and I love David but this relationship, this thing, it's changed and I'd rather leave and have those good times cemented in my head than stay and grow to resent both of you." And if as an afterthought he added, "it's the best I can do."
And it was as if all the rage inside of me had built up to a point where all I wanted to do was explode,
"Fuck that! The best you can do! The best you can do! Don't think that after twelve years you can just give me some bullshit excuse and think that'll be enough cause it's not. I love you James and my son, our son loves you. How can you willingly throw that all away?" He didn't answer my question but instead, lowered his head and sighed.
"I don't expect you to understand Neil. And I don't expect David to understand either and if you both want to hate me, then go ahead. But know this, I still love both of you and David will always be my son, no matter what."
For a moment, we just looked at each other as if playing a game of psych to see who would flinch first. But I knew this was no game and there could be no winners here. He finished packing his clothing and zipped up his suitcase in one swift move. He walked towards me, stopped and reached into his pocket, pulling out a piece of paper.
"This is the place I'm staying. It's in Queens. I'm hoping to find a place of my own soon and I'll let you know when that happens. I still want to help out financially with David and..."
I didn't even let him finish before starting my tirade. He had been the most important person in my life next to my son and now that he had made it clear we were no longer priority in his life, I wanted to make it clear what I thought of his charity.
"You can keep your fucking money for someone else because David doesn't need it. He has a father who cares and loves him and would never abandon him. You managed to fool us into thinking that you cared for us, that you wanted to make this `thing' work. Well, you had your chance and you only get one. Just get out and take your damn number with you."
And with that, I crumpled the paper within my hand and threw it on the ground. He looked at it and then back up at me, unmoving and walked right past me out the door. When I heard the door close, it took me less than ten seconds to break down. My knees felt like jelly and I had no choice but to hold unto the door for support. In my mind, I cursed the day I met him and the day I ever introduced him to my son. `I could survive without him', I told myself but as sobs racked my body, those words were just as meaningless to me as had been James' feeling for me. I made my way into the bedroom and without thinking, picked up a cologne bottle and threw it into the vanity. And as the glass shattered into many pieces, I couldn't help but find comfort in my distorted image. After all, it was how I felt, broken and discarded.
Comments for this and other stories are encouraged and appreciated and I do reply to all emails. My new email address is juniorj009@gmail.com
Thanks for reading. Other stories of mine include: BEGINNINGS December 3rd 2002 YO B Dec 27 2002 heart-and-soul/ INTERACIAL Nov 5 2004 story-of-us/ Jan 2 2003 to-sir-with-love/ Dec 27 2002 heart-and-soul/
MILITARY Dec 21 2002 the-recruiter/ RELATIONSHIPS Nov 5 2004 story-of-us/ Jun 6 2005 redemption/ BI RELATIONSHIPS
Dec 20 2002 graduation-day/