Advisory: This story is pure fantasy and doesn't reflect the actual characters or actors on Days of Our Lives. The show and characters are trademarks of and copyright Corday Productions Inc., in association with Columbia Pictures Television.
Note: This story was started about two years back, so the action takes place at about that point in the show.
Check out my Yahoo Group for gay Days fiction by me and others at www.groups.yahoo.com/group/daysgayfiction
I managed to get out of the bushes and into one of the park's public restrooms without being seen, where I cleaned up enough to be able to get home. I took a quick shower and then collapsed back onto my bed, where this whole day had started. I'd certainly never expected anything like this when I woke up! My ass was feeling very sore, but it had been more than worth it. I must have dozed off for awhile, because when my cell phone rang, I jumped awake with a start. For a second, I had no clue where I was. Then it all came back and I rolled over to the bedside table and grabbed the cell phone, a staple for any Salemite. "Hello?" "Philip?" A familiar voice sounded in my ear. "Yeah?" "I saw you, Philip. I saw what you did with Brady in the park!" I closed my eyes for a second, imaging the whole scene I'd been engaged in from a third person view. "Oh." What else could I say? "Is that all you're going to say?" Shawn asked. He sounded angry. "What do you want me to say, Shawn?" I asked quietly. "Why didn't you ever tell me?" "Tell you that I'm gay, you mean?" I asked, wondering what his reaction was going to be in the long run to this turn of events. "No, that you're my long lost twin brother. What do you think I mean, Phil? Why didn't you tell me? I thought I was your best friend." The sarcasm in Shawn's voice gave way and he sounded hurt. "You are. Listen, can we meet somewhere? This isn't a conversation I want to have with you over the phone, man." Shawn was quiet for so long that I was about to ask if he was still there when I finally heard him sigh. "Okay. Let's me down at the docks. My parents' boat is there, we can talk and not worry about anyone overhearing." "I'll be there in twenty minutes," I said, hanging up before he could change his mind. I sat on the edge of the bed, my thoughts spinning. With any other guy on the show, I'd have used this to my advantage. Since arriving in Salem, in Philip's body, I'd managed to seduce Jason, Austin, and Brady by playing on what I knew about their characters from watching the show. I'd been a different person with each of them, and the only motive had been the hot sex. Shawn was different, though. With Shawn, I wanted to be myself, the real me. I wanted more from him than just great sex, though I wanted plenty of that, too. I didn't want to play games with him. As I got ready to head to the docks to meet him, I felt for the first time that the mask I'd been wearing, the thing that had made me feel so invincible and able to do all the things I'd never have dared to do as my regular self, was slipping.I was more nervous than I ever remember being in my life. This was like first date jitters times ten billion.
The docks were deserted and I walked along with the sound of the water lapping against them playing in my ears. I'd already become used to my surroundings, the earlier awe of finding the sets from the show suddenly real places having faded.
The Fancy Face was docked just ahead of me and I made my way towards it, my heart pounding.
Shawn was sitting with his legs hanging over the side, looking out at the water, his back to me. He'd changed his clothes since the basketball game, donning a long sleeved baby blue knit shirt and khaki slacks.
The term breathtaking came to mind.
"Hey Shawn," I said quietly. My voice sounded suddenly rusty and unused.
"Hi," Shawn's voice was just as quiet. For a moment, I wondered if he was even going to turn around and face me.
Then he slowly stood up and looked around.
"Come aboard. Let's talk," he said, gesturing to the door to the living quarters on the boat.
I followed him down the steps into the familiar setting and we were soon sitting across the table, facing each other.
I knew he was waiting for me to do the talking, so I plunged right in, my heart still pounding.
"Shaw, I'm really sorry about you finding out the way you did. I never wanted that."
"Yeah, it was pretty... shocking," Shawn said, not quite looking me in the eye.
"I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you, but I just didn't know how you'd react."
His eyes met mine now and he shook his head. "Phil, you know me. Do you really think I'd turn my back on you because you're gay? You're my best friend. You're family."
I winced at that last word. Family. Damn the interconnected families on this show! Shawn was my nephew. But then again, the only guy I'd fooled around with since my arrive who wasn't family was Jason. Austin was my half brother and Brady another nephew.
But there was still a difference. I wanted more than fooling around with Shawn.
"Shawn, it's very scary. You don't know what it's like to have to carry a secret like this and never know for sure just how anyone will react. I didn't think you'd hate me, but I wasn't ready to risk it. You mean too much to me." I resisted an urge to reach across the table and take his hand in mine.
Shawn stood up and started pacing around in the small space available.
"Fine, Phil, I guess I can understand that. But..." he stopped and shook his head.
"But what, Shawn?" I asked.
"Brady? Philip, what were you thinking? Are you two.. I mean, has that happened before? Are you guys, like, dating? And what about Chloe??"
"Whoa, one question at a time! What was I thinking? I don't know. I was thinking like a lot of guys our age, I guess. With my dick."
Shawn's eyes widened but that was his only visible reaction.
"No, I've never been with Brady before that. It just sort of happened. Um... how much did you see?" I asked, wondering if he'd been there for the whole show.
"Enough," Shawn said tersely.
"Okay," I said, drawing out the word. Obviously he didn't want to talk about the specifics. "About Chloe, I don't know. It's a mess and I'm going to have to clean it up. I don't want to hurt her. But she's not the one for me. I'm gay."
Shawn sat back down across from me and sighed. "She's going to be really hurt."
"I know," I whispered. I did feel a little bad about that, but after all, it wasn't really my mess. I'd stepped into the game halfway through. Chloe had already been involved.
Shawn looked at me for a little while, saying nothing. I just looked back, waiting, my heart still beating fast. He looked so beautiful, sitting there. I could have stared at him for hours.
"When... when did you..." he hesitated, blushing a bit.
"When did I what?" I asked, trying to sound encouraging.
"Um.. first know you were... gay?" Shawn's blush deepened.
"I always knew, on some level. I just didn't want to admit it to myself," I said.
"Was.. I mean, had you.. was Brady your first time?" Shawn was practically squirming in his seat with embarrassment.
"No. That was my second time. And I'd fooled around with another guy, but not gone all the way," I said, deciding to be honest about my sexual history, at least since the moment I became Philip.
"Phil, you and Brady are related to each other," Shawn pointed out, as if I'd forgotten.
"Not that closely, Shawn. I mean, we aren't brothers," I said, an image of Austin's face as it had looked while he was fucking my ass flashing before my eyes. "And we really don't know each other that well, even if his dead mother was my half sister. I never even met her."
"Still..."
"Shawn, it's like with you and me. I don't really consider you family. You're my best friend. I hardly ever think about the fact that your dad is my half brother. Do you?" I asked, thinking how silly it all sounded when spoken aloud like that.
"I guess not," Shawn admitted.
We sat quietly for a minute or two. I wondered what Shawn was thinking. Was he remembering what he'd seen between Brady and I? In a way, I was glad he'd seen.
"Why did you come back? I asked, as the thought struck me.
"What?"
"To the park. I thought you had to meet Belle at Dot Com. Why did you come back?"
Shawn opened and closed his mouth a few times, and I thought I detected a look in his eyes that verged almost on panic.
"I... um... I just.. I don't know," he finished lamely.
"Well, you had to have had some reason. I mean, you couldn't get out of there fast enough after..." I paused, remembering the sudden, accidental touch of his hand on my hard-on during out game of one on one. "... what happened."
Shawn blushed deeply again and nervously ran his hand through his hair.
"Let's just forget about that, okay? It was an accident."
"Shawn, I didn't think you were trying to cop a feel, if that's what you're worried about!" I laughed. "We were playing a game, man. And it.. um.. got in the way."
"Yeah," Shawn nodded in agreement.
"So, why did you come back?"
"I wanted to make sure you were too embarrassed. I wasn't sure I handled it right," he said, and I could tell somehow, just by looking into his eyes, that he was telling the truth. He'd come back to make sure I was okay. I think at that moment, I feel even more in love with him.
Of course, me being me, I covered it with a joke. "Oh, don't worry, you handled it just right!" I winked.
Shawn jumped up and shook his head. "I didn't mean that!"
"Shawn, relax! I'm sorry. That was just a bad joke! I didn't mean it. Look, it means a lot to me that you were concerned and wanted to make sure I was all right. Thank you."
Shawn gave a little snort and shook his head again. "Oh, you were more than all right! Didn't take you very long after I left to get busy, did it? I wasn't gone more than a few minutes and when I got back you were... in the bushes."
"It just happened, Shawn. He was watching us play and he realized that I was turned on by you. It just sort of happened," I tried to explain.
"You were turned on by me?"
It was my turn to blush and stammer.
"I mean.. well, yeah, but..."
Damn. If only this wasn't Shawn! I could so easily try and play this situation to my advantage. But with him, I felt like a lovesick teenager.
"By me?" Shawn asked again, his voice barely a whisper.
I was faced with a dilemma like I'd never known before. Should I respond honestly, and risk losing him as even a friend? But wasn't there a hint of something else in the air? Was I wrong, or just indulging in wishful thinking, to think that maybe Shawn was interested in me? In Philip?
I decided I had to risk it, I had to be honest.
I nodded slowly and looked into his eyes.
"Yeah, Shawn. By you. I... I've had feelings for you for a long time."
Shawn stared at me for a few endless moments and then turned around and ran up the stairs.
"Shawn!" I followed as quickly as I could, but he was already on the docks and showed no signs of turning back.
"Fuck!" I shouted and began kicking anything and everything in sight, venting my frustration and anger at myself. I'd blown it.
"Philip? Hey! Philip, stop!" I was grabbed roughly by the arm and looked up into a very familiar face.
"What are you doing?"
"Brandon?" I asked.
"Yeah. What's going on? Why are you destroying Bo Brady's boat?"
"I... Shawn... I..." it was too all too much. I'd ruined everything. I felt the tears spilling over and rolling down my cheeks.
"Are you all right? Hey, what's going on?" Brandon's voice was filled with very real concern and I felt him put his arm around my shoulders.
"I love him," I burst out, collapsing against Brandon's firm body and letting myself be held. It felt really good.
"You love Shawn?" To my surprise, there was no shock or disgust in Brandon's voice. Instead it was soothing and caring.
"Yes," I said, pulling back and looking into his eyes. There was nothing but kindness there.
"Does he know that?"
"I just told him. And he ran off without saying a word," I tried to choke back some of the tears, feeling incredibly foolish. I was standing in front of Brandon Walker, and instead of making some play to get the stud in bed, I was crying like a 13 year old girl who's favorite Backstreet Boy just came out of the closet.
Brandon pulled me into a hug for a few seconds, his strong arms around my back, our bodies pressed together.
"I understand what you're going through, man. I mean, to a degree. I know it's not the same thing as finally getting up the nerve to tell another guy you like him, of course. But we've all been where you are now. We've all been rejected by someone we care about," Brandon said, his eyes taking on a distant look.
"You're talking about Sami, aren't you?" I asked.
Brandon looked at me in surprise but then nodded. "Yeah. I loved her and wanted to be with her, but she wants Austin. He's not right for her, but there's nothing I can do."
"Maybe she'll come around," I said, remembering my night with Austin.
"I can't wait around on maybe. She's made her choice. But Philip, man, you've got to give Shawn some time. Maybe he's not interested, but maybe he's just scared. You don't know yet. Hang in there until you do know for sure. And no matter what happens, you're a great guy. You'll find the right one for you."
"Brandon, I never realized you were so amazing! I mean, you didn't even bat an eye when I told you I loved Shawn. You come off as this super macho boxer, I thought you'd be freaked by the idea of me being gay."
Brandon smiled and shook his head. "Nah. Gay, straight, bi, it doesn't matter to me. Personally, I think everyone is bisexual to a degree."
My ears perked up a bit at this, but before I had time to register this most interesting of comments fully, I noticed that Brandon was no longer looking at me, but at someone over my shoulder.
I turned around and saw Shawn standing there, staring at me.
"I think you two need some time to talk," Brandon said. "Phil, you can call me any time if you need to talk about things," Brandon smiled, squeezing my shoulder as he turned to walk away, leaving me alone again with Shawn.
We stared at each other in silence, my cheeks still embarrisingly wet from my outburst and Shawn's chest rising and falling, his breath still not quite caught after his sudden sprint.
The silence grew as our eyes remained locked together.