Another episode finished! If ya'll don't know me, I wrote Perfection and Flawless in the high school section. They're a little old, but worth checking out (in my opinion, and I'm biased). So read them and give me a shout and tell me how ya'll like them.
And hey, I don't know much about college (I'm a senior in HS) so don't attack me if I get some of the technicalities wrong. Yeah, I'm young; so sue me.
James and Jake (names changed) are actually college friends of mine, and, unbeknownst to them, I've written this story about them. No, neither of them are gay (to my knowedge), but everything I've said them are true and those boys are damn fine. They'd be a gorgeous couple if they only saw each other the way they do in this story. If only life would work out perfectly.
E-mail me your comments and let me know if I should either write more, or permanently stop all contact with my keyboard.
Oh, and thanks for all ya'lls e-mails. I was pretty surprised at the number of people who wrote me (like thirty or so). . . But still, be sure and let me know also if you want something to happen in the story or have an idea where it should go from here.
*Opening lyrics: 'I Started A Joke' -The Wallflowers
RJSWIM101@hotmail.com
If ya'll aren't eighteen, go jack off to your daddy's porno. If ya'll are eighteen, go jack off to your daddy's porno. There's no beat-off sex scenes in this story.
WAITING FOR JAMES (3)
I started a joke I started the whole world crying But I didn't see That the joke was on me I started to cry I started the whole world laughing If I'd only seen That the joke was on me
I looked at the skies Running my hands Over my eyes And I fell out of bed And hurt my head >From the things that I said
I finally died And I started the whole world living Oh if I'd only seen That the joke was on me
"I'm sorry James, first of all I'm really sorry for what happened. I'm sorry that I hurt you and I'm sorry that you questioned that I loved you." I could tell that he was about to say something, but I stopped him, placing a finger to his lips. "I took your trust and your love for granted, and I forgot your feelings."
We were walking across the quad as the snow fell softly. Thousands of tiny white flakes floated across the empty open, the sun barely showing through the dark clouds and the dead trees. The quietness matched our mood perfectly, and James looked so sad. I could see it in his eyes, and the way he had dressed. A simple black turtleneck sweater and gray wool pants. He must have been freezing, but he had his hands in his pockets and his jaw was set. I could tell me was hurt, but trying his best not to let it show.
"Look, stop right here." I grabbed his arms and turned him toward me. "She's not my daughter James, I'm just helping a friend."
He nodded, but I knew he wasn't convinced. "Then why didn't you tell me. I would have understood. I wouldn't have held it against you." He pulled away from me and continued walking. I hurried to keep up. "The part that hurts me the most is that you didn't tell me. What else have you been keeping from me, Jake?"
It broke my heart to see him so angry and confused. I put my arm around him and drew him close. He had snowflakes all over his hair and his eyes had gone from their usual bright green to an almost olive jungle green. He was paling from the cold, and I knew instinctively that he'd be sick.
"Here, take my coat." I took my heavy parka off and wrapped it around his shoulders, cupping his hands in mine. They were like ice, and his breath clouded above us.
"I just want to let you know that no matter how disappointed, angry, or betrayed you feel, I still love you." I knew it was the last thing that needed to be injected into the conversation, but I had to speak the truth. "I didn't tell you because I didn't have the heart to break up what we had. Everything was going so well."
"So you decided to let everything go on for just a little bit more and then have me find out on my own? Is that what you call honesty?"
But he was still clenching my hands, and he didn't shrug my arm from around his waist. "I know what I did was the wrong thing, but believe me, I really honestly thought it would help if you just didn't have more things complicating your life right now."
We had reached the steps of our apartment, and icicles had already formed above the awning. The snow was falling faster than ever and the streetlights had turned on from the steadily advancing dusk. "That's just it Jake. It's not my life, or your life. It's our lives. I want it to be like that, us together, no secrets kept."
He hugged me tightly, and I awkwardly returned his hug, trying to fish in my pocket for the keys at the same time. "Let's get inside and warm up."
I finally got the door open and the blast of warm air was a relief. The wind blew some snow and cold air in with it, but the door was soon closed and I took my coat and hung it on the rack. His teeth were chattering, and his face had turned red from the abrupt change of head. I took off my hat and I sat down on the couch, patting the cushion beside me. "Come sit with me, we might as well pass the time comfortably until you get sick."
"Get sick?" He gave me a quizzical look, but I shrugged it off.
"You've been outside without a coat or hat for awhile, you'll be sick in a day or two."
We sat in silence, and I finally grabbed him and dragged him closer, putting my head on his shoulder. "Okay James, I made a bad decision, do you forgive me?"
He looked at me skeptically, and I rubbed my hand across his chest. "Maybe."
I got off the couch and knelt in front of him. "James, please forgive me. I love you."
He smiled and rubbed my shoulder. "Hey, while you're down there, could you, um," he turned even redder than he was and looked away. This boy was hopeless.
"Could I give you head?" I asked, grabbing his chin and forcing him to look in my eyes. "Say it. Say, Jake, please give me a blow job."
"Jake could you please give me," he paused and I cocked my head, watching him. "Give me a blow job." He finished quietly.
I nodded and stood up a little, drawing his lower lip inbetween mine. I let his tounge into my mouth, feeling him tremble a little. Partly from his residual hypothermia, and I saw a tear trickle from his eyes. "Oh god, I really hurt you, didn't I."
"Jeez Einstein, did you just figure that out?" He brushed the tear away and smiled. "But I love you and I want you to suck my dick."
I was surprised and pleased. Wow, he didn't even blush that time. I bent over and unzipped his pants, reaching in and taking his swelling member into my hand. Well, at least one thing didn't freeze and fall off. I slowly jacked him off, moving my hand up and down, watching as his lips parted and released a soft moan. "Do you like that?" he nodded and ran a hand through my hair.
I slowly leant down and began running my tounge up and down the length of his shaft. He bucked his hips slightly, but I made him to wait, pushing him back on the couch forcefully. I took all of him into my mouth abruptly, pushing myself all the way down forcing the length of him into the back of my throat. He let out a surprised cry and his body shuddered. God how I'd been scared that I wouldn't be able to do this again.
I reached up into his sweater, slowly massaging his warm skin, my fingers searching the ridges between his defined muscles. He threw his head back as I pinched one of his nipples, rolling it gently between my fingers. His hand was planted firmly on my head and he guided me down faster and faster.
I let him go at his pace, and soon his hips bucked from the couch and filled my mouth with his sweet load. I held it in my mouth until I could kiss him and swap the mixture of cum and saliva with him. I just relaxed and enjoyed kissing him, tasting his load and his saliva in my mouth, feeling the warmth of his tounge and mouth. He reached for me, but I pulled away. "Hey tiger, you'll get other chances. This was my chance to pleasure you and I did."
He grinned and gave my cock another quick rub.
"I'll get us some hot chocolate," I said jumping up. He tried to follow, but I jumped in his lap and kissed him, pulling the blanket from the back of the couch and spreading it over him. "Stay here jock boy, you're sick." He protested, but I knew it was coming.
I put my feet on the floor, and I knew from the way he was curled up in the fetal position next to me that he had a fever. I immediately grabbed the extra strength tylenol and the thermometer from the bathroom, and found the chicken soup and orange juice. I poured him a glass and put two pills next to it on the bed.
I shook him gently, but he remained curled up with his eyes tightly shut. "James, wake up," I whispered in his ear, but he remained fast asleep. I bent over and turned his head, and kissed him gently, letting my lips linger on his. His eyes opened, and he groaned.
"See, I told you. You're sick." Before he could protest, I put the thermometer in his mouth and pushed his head back on the pillow. He was so beautiful lying there, naked under the covers with a thermometer sticking out of his mouth. God, I felt like a mother or something. The thermometer beeped and I took it back out.
102.4.
"James, stay in bed. You're going no where today." I took the two pills from the table and put them into his hand and gestured to the orange juice. "You're feel a lot better after you get that fever down a little bit. He gave me the biggest sad eyes I'd ever seen and I almost choked. He took the pills and pitifully gestured toward me and then to the bed. I sighed and got back under the covers, wrapping my arms around him.
"You're pretty darned helpless sick aren't you buddy?" I ran my hand across his strong jawline and he turned and smiled. "And it sure takes the words out of you." He lay silent and let me run my hands through his hair.
"Jake, have you thought about telling anyone about us. I mean, possibly your family or me telling mine? What about our friends?"
I was a little surprised that he was bringing that up at a time like this, but I was happy to discuss it. I'd actually thought about it a few times, and I didn't exactly know what to do. I wasn't out, and he definitely wasn't out. But looking at him, beautiful and charming, strong and charismatic, you really wouldn't have thought that about him. Most people's thought when they see James is 'Wow.' Me included.
"I can't tell my parents James, they wouldn't understand." I smiled sadly at him. "But Kylie knows, and she accepts it."
James nodded and shifted a little, pushing my head on to his chest. He ran his fingers up and down my back, staring at the ceiling thoughtfully. "I guess my parents wouldn't mind that much. They're great people and I know they're pretty open minded. It's just my friends that I'm worried about."
Tell me about it, so was I. They were all pretty hardcore jocks, you know, swap stories about women and beer, and give each other one armed hugs and pats on the back that would send me into the hospital with six herniated disks.
"Well, some of my friends would be okay with it. Soccer players tend to be a little better than baseball players. I think a few of my teammates wouldn't mind. The other half are so brain dead that they wouldn't even understand what I was talking about."
He laughed, and it was one of his mellow relaxed laughs. His voice went deep when he was happy or at ease. I was glad to finally see that part of him rising to the surface again.
I returned from class and shook the melting snow from my hair. I placed my books and notes on the side table and took my coat and gloves off. "James?"
I called, and after receiving no answer, I went through to the living room. He was asleep on the couch, the blanket over him with his head propped up on the pillows, exactly the way I had left him in the morning. I shook his arm, and he opened his eyes, smiling.
He pulled the blanket off and produced a wrapped box. "I snuck out while you were gone. I got you a late Christmas present."
I could have cried, and I could tell that I would later. He was just so caring and sweet, thinking of little things to do to make me happy even when I had treated him like shit. I pulled off the paper and held the box in my hand. "Damon Fine Jewlwry? You really didn't have to do this James."
"Just open it, come on." I lifted the lid of the box, revealing two identical platinum bands. I gasped, and immediately felt the tears falling from my eyes.
"I thought we could each have one, you know, to symbolize our love." He was blushing again, so I hugged, him, trying to control myself and calm down. I took his hand and pushed the ring onto his fourth finger, watching as the precious metal caught the light and sparkled brilliantly.
"Now you," he said softly, and slipped the ring on my finger. I admired it and held it up in front of me.
"It's the best Christmas present anyone's ever gotten me," I said giving him a kiss. "I just feel like shit that I completely forgot to get you something."
He grabbed my hands and smiled. "Jake, giving me your honest and sincere love is enough Christmas presents to last a lifetime."
I lay in his arms listening to his breathing, watching his chest rise and fall. His forehead was less hot, so I knew that the fever was going down, but all fever's do at night. His eyelashes fluttered in his sleep, and he smiled as I pulled him closer, kissing his cheek before I turned out the light on the end table. I held him close and thanked God that I had somebody like James to fill the gap in my life.
It was my first time at a gay night club, and 'Eden's Eleven' wasn't much different than any other posh downtown joint. I entered through a long line into an entrance shaped like a large drain pipe. The laser lights from the club below flashed up into the entrance and illuminated the faces around me breifly. The bass beat pounded into my head, and I couldn't help feeling a little adrenaline rush. James had refused to go with me, saything that he wasn't ready to be in an environment like this yet. Oh well, his loss.
I flashed my (not really mine) ID to the bouncer at the door and was waved inside.
"Jake, is that you?"
God, I was barely in the door and someone recognized me. I turned around and was startled to see Chad and a junior from one of the fraternities hand in hand. Chad was a friend from the team, just a usual all around great guy and he was pretty funny, at least in the showers.
"Hey guys," I said waving as they approached me. "It's, um, interesting to see you here."
Chad blushed and motioned to the man holding his hand. "This is Jacob," he said pointing to the taller man who smiled and nodded at me. "He's an alpha omega."
I smiled politely. "And this is his friend Derek who we dragged here agianst his will." I looked up and saw what I first mistook to be a younger version of Hugh Jackman. He had spiky brownish blond hair and stood at just about six feet. He was wearing a blue tank top and faded jeans, and moved almost indecernibly to the music. He smiled and I just barely managed to hide my rush of lust.
Jake, calm down, just think of James. Think of James, you can do it.
"So, we're gonna go dance. Why don't you and Derek talk a little?" Chad winked at me and he pulled Jacob off across the dance floor. I smiled at Derek again, the goofy in-lust face that I used only for special occasions.
"So, can I buy you a drink?"
His voice was deep and it had this smooth flow to it. Maybe I was just delusional. "That wasn't a very straight thing to say," I said trying not to make eye contact.
"Maybe I'm not straight."
I looked over at him, captivated by his large brown eyes. They were so soulful and seductive. "Chad claimed they had to drag you here," I said skeptically. Motioning toward all the beautiful bodies dancing across the floor I narrowed my eyebrows. "I must be mistaken, but this seems like a gay man's dream."
"Hey, I didn't say I wasn't straight." I tired to work the double negative out in my head. "I got dragged here because I would have rather stayed at home and had a good long jack off session than come here and watch Chad and Jacob play tonsil hockey."
Whoa, this cowboy was straightforward and a half. Straightforward means dominant. I'd better watch myself.
"Sure, I'll just have a beer." He smiled and waved the bartender over. We began to talk, and sure enough, we had almost everything in common. I began to say something and he finished my sentence. He said something and I said, me too. It seemed like we were almost identical, and we laughed at the coincidence.
He had a pierced tounge, and I was captivated by the light as it struck it and glittered. He had this way of turning his head to the side as he listened that made you feel as if everything you were saying was the most important and fascinating thing on the planet. Maybe it was just the alcohol.
"You need a lift home?" I shook my head.
"No, I'll just call a cab." I grabbed my coat and headed toward the door. I felt a hand on my shoulder and turned to see Derek. He grinned and handed me a piece of paper.
"It's my phone number, call me if you ever want to talk about anything, or even if you want to go out and do something." He leaned in and kissed me gently on the lips, and then he was gone. I touched where his lips had, and tasted his lingering presence.
And then I felt the rise of nausea. I hadn't cheated on James, but I had gotten pretty damn close. Jesus, where was my self control? I let another guy kiss me and flirt with me all night, and I couldn't say a damn word about it. My not saying anything was getting me in more and more trouble.
I left the club and dashed up the stairs, breathing heavily as I got out into the crisp night air. I took great lungfulls of the cold air and collapsed against the building. I had to tell him. I knew that he would probably find out one way or another, and telling him now would be better than him finding out. I knew that from experience.
I took a taxi back to the apartment, and finally found myself in front of the door. I unlocked and pushed it open, finding the apartment dark and quiet. I closed the door behind me as quietly as possible. I went into the bedroom, and found him lying there, his eyes closed, his hands above his head. He had fallen asleep on top of the comforter and was snoring softly. I fingered the ring around my finger, and hoped that, despite my stupid mistakes, I would still be able to wear it.
I took off my shirt and pants, leaving them in a pile in the corner. I lifted James up slowly and pulled the comforter out from under him, and then over the two of us. I wrapped my arms around his chest and pulled him into me so my head lay on his shoulder.
"Did you have a good time tonight?" God how I loved his voice.
"James, we need to talk." He stiffened against me as soon as I said that and he turned around abruptly, our noses almost touching.
"So, talk."
"I was at the club tonight and I saw two of my friends, Chad and his boyfriend Jacob." He nodded and I twisted his hair in my hands nervously. "One of their friends Derek was there and we ended up spending most of the evening talking together."
James was quiet, and he silently prompted me to continue. "So we hit it off really well, and it was time to go, so." I trailed off. I almost couldn't bear to tell him.
James' lips were pursed and he was frowning angrily. "So you left with him and you guys fucked or something?"
"God no James, he kissed me and I couldn't do anything to stop him. I was just frozen. Then I ran out into the street and I felt like throwing up. I thought I'd lost you."
I felt angry and confused when he began to laugh, and I looked at him, ready to yell at him for mocking me. But he gave me a hug and squeezed me tightly against him. "Jake, I'm not going to be mad at you because someone kissed you. Hey, it's not like you kissed him and you stopped it before it could turn into anything more. You can't blame him Jake, you are one hell of a sexy boy."
I was speechless. "So, you're not mad at me?"
He shook his head. "I'm just happy that it didn't go any further."
God, I was so relieved. I kissed him happily, and just lay there smiling. I fingered my ring and let out a deep breath. And I promised myself that I'd never get into another situation like that again.
I woke up, and immediately smiled at the handsome man standing over me with a cup of coffee. I sat up and accepted the steaming mug, catching the rich aroma that helped me to come back to the world of the living.
"Hey, I'm not sick anymore." James twirled around in a circle and gave me a toothy grin.
"Dear, you're a baseball player, not a ballarina. Don't mistake the two."
He stuck out his bottom lip, and again, I just wanted to go over there and have my way with him. "Pout like that anymore and you're asking for another round of morning sex."
He pouted some more, and I could tell he was really horny. I threw my boxers at him and walked naked into the bathroom and turned on the water, testing the temperature until it was sufficiently hot. James eyed me from the bedroom.
"Oh, golly gee. I guess I'll just take this shower all by my lonesome," I said shrugging. "Unless my handsome stud boyfriend wants to come and have one with me."
I'd never seen that boy move so fast, not even out on the field. He ducked under the spray, plastering his beautiful black hair down against his head. I kissed him slowly, letting my tounge roam the inside of his mouth, the hot water cascading down around us. Steam billowed out form our bodies, and he pushed me up against the tiled edge of the shower, sucking my neck hungrily.
I moaned loudly, letting the hot feeling of his tounge on my skin and the water take over my senses. He moved back up to me, feeding hungrily on my mouth, running his tounge along mine. I felt his wet erection press firmly against my thigh, and I ran my hands down, slowly drawing my fingers up and down and across the length of his hardness. I rubbed my thumb across the head eliciting a series of sharp gasps from James.
I turned him around to face the wall, placing his hands above his head. He turned around, his eyes wide. "Make love to me Jake."
I pushed one finger inside of him, loosening him up again, feeling the silky warmness of his guts suck at my finger. I worked a second and a third finger in, and soon he was bucking back against me. I removed my fingers and placed my cock against his hole, feeling the inviting heat from his body. I pushed slowly, letting all of my length sink into him slowly.
"There's no pain this time," he grunted, a silly smile plastered across his face. "Just pleasure. God, you feel so good inside of me."
I pulled out and pushed back in, feeling the beautiful sensations running up and down my dick, feeling the suction of his insides. "Do it Jake, give it to me rough."
And I did. I pulled out of him and slammed back in, pushing him up against the wall of the shower. He grunted in appreciation and one of his hands drifted back to pull me further into him. "Your dick is so beautiful, I love when you fuck me."
I reached around and began slowly jacking him off, carefully running my fingers of the ridge of his head and teasing him as I continued to roughly assault him asshole. Finally he groaned loudly and came into my fingers. I felt the warm milky load squirt out and I caught as much of it as I could.
I continued to fuck him hard, feeding him his cum as I came closer and closer to orgasm. The feeling of his warm tounge lapping his load from my fingers was too much and I emptied my load deep into his ass, letting the warm wet feeling spread into his body. He turned around and smiled, licking a stray drop of jism from his lips. I removed my softening cock from his hole and shut off the water.
He pulled me into him and we kissed. "It's not just the sex, you know, as great as it is."
I toweled his hair as he finished drying me off. "The sex is great, but it's you that makes it that great. I love you so much Jake."
The sheer pleasure of hearing those words from as someone as perfect as James left me speechless. But he understood and hugged me close, rubbing my back.
The phone rang and we broke apart, coming back to reality. I opened the door and was instantly hit by a wall of cold air. James must have felt the same way because he grabbed his towel and began shivering. I closed the door to the bathroom and hurried over as the phone began its fourth ring.
"Hello?"
"Jake, it's about Halle."
God, it was Kylie, and she wanted to talk about my daughter? Well that cuaght my attention pretty effectively. "Yeah?"
"You and I have to get married."
Christ, like I needed that right now. "Jesus Kylie, what brought that on? You know we can't get married, I'm gay."
"My mom said that to keep the baby, I have to get married to you. If we don't get married, I have to put the child up for adoption. If you won't marry me, how will I know I've found a decent family for her? I'm not even guarenteed to get to see her."
God, this looked so much like a no win situation. But wait. "Kylie, I think I have a solution."
I hung up the phone and went back into the bathroom.
"James, how would you feel about having a daughter?"
Okay, so I finished the third installment. Should I keep going? Okay, let me know and if you have any ideas for the plot development, I'm more than happy to take some advice. RJSWIM101@hotmail.com