Unlocking Sexual Secrets
Part 149
Nifty / bisexual / adult-friends
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The following Thursday, Louise skipped work drinks. She said she had a headache. She was home when I got back from work.
After dinner, I decided to deal with something that had been bugging me. I asked to see Louise's glamor shots. At first, she was reluctant. But I pressed her on it. Finally, she gave me a glare and gave in.
"OK, Ron. You want to see my glamor portfolio? OK. I guess it doesn't matter. Let's fucking look at it then."
I didn't know what to make of Louise's tone, which was halfway between 'pissed' and 'don't give a shit'.
Louise got her laptop. She navigated to her model profile on an agency site she'd apparently signed up with.
She immediately went to an area that was password protected. Then she entered her password and a gallery section opened up.
"OK, Ron. Let's fucking look. Let's see if you fucking like what you see."
Louise handed me the laptop. Then she angrily lit a cigarette.
I saw that there were a number of galleries. They were named "Gallery 1", "Gallery 2", and so on.
I opened the first gallery, "Gallery 1".
The set was a series of pictures, which you could click on to enlarge. It also had a slideshow mode. I entered slideshow mode.
The first gallery initially featured Louise looking sultry sitting on a large bed. She was fully clothed. Well, at this point she was. A low cut white sleeveless top, baggy blue jeans and bare feet. It looked like Louise was wearing some sort of sexy lingerie underneath. And indeed, by the third picture Louise had removed her top and jeans and was standing there in, I'm not sure how to describe it, a black and pink all in one bra and panties set. It wasn't a corset. It was like the bra and panties were connected by a chevroned triangular panel that started under the heavy cups of the brassiere part of the outfit and got thinner until it connected with the top of the thong part covering Louise's pussy. There were a couple of shots from the front, Louise pressing her ample bust out towards the camera, and a couple from the back, including an over-the-shoulder shot.
In the next few pictures, Louise had unpeeled the top-half of the outfit, pulling the bra part of the outfit down, freeing her pendulous breasts.
Then there were what I guess you'd call the money shots. Three pictures of Louise, full frontal nude, sitting on the bed. Legs wide open in one of them.
I took a deep breath but didn't say anything. Shit.
Louise sat in silence smoking as I opened "Gallery 2". I went slideshow mode again.
This one had Louise in swimwear. Wait, no, not swimwear. She was outdoors alright, on a patio with some green foliage behind her, but what looked at first to me like a peach/pink striped bikini actually had matching knee length stockings. So it wasn't swimwear.
This set had Louise obviously trying to look sexy. I could tell by her face that these pictures were all 'posed'. I mean not exactly natural. If anyone could tell, it was me. To the naked eye, the photos looked OK.
Some shots were frontal, others side on. The side on ones had that breast 'underhang' thing going on with the bottom half, well, more than half, of Louise's tits fully visible from under the bikini top.
Like the previous set, some shots were taken from the back, some with Louise looking over her shoulder. There was a lot of Louise's ass on show in the side on and rear shots, but I found myself surprised when I got to the end of that gallery, that Louise had kept her outfit on, well what there was of it, in all of the pictures.
Next was "Gallery 3".
This one started with Louise standing indoors in front of some silver- painted antique style chairs, in a low-cut black mini-dress, bare-legged and wearing black high-heeled sandals. This set developed quite quickly, with Louise lifting the front of the dress up to expose her shaved pussy as early as picture number two. The rest of the pictures featured Louise with her tits hanging out, open-legged, and in the final shots teasing her pussy-lips apart while looking aroused. She was flashing these come to bed eyes, and was open-mouthed in a couple of shots, like she trying to look like she was about to come.
Fuck. I was not liking this.
The last was "Gallery 4".
This was shot in a bright bedroom on a large bed, not the same one as in 'Gallery 1'. These ones had Louise in a tight black corset and nothing else. Her tits and pussy were exposed in all of the pictures.
Fuck, this one started hard. And didn't get any softer.
The pictures showed Louise playing to the camera like she was modeling for a mens' magazine. One shot had her squatted on the bed, legs akimbo, her wide-open pussy fully exposed, her head flung back and her massive titties seemingly defying gravity as they pointed up at the ceiling. The rest were more of the same. There was some self-titty sucking. She was holding her gold vibrator in a couple of shots. Smiling. She wasn't actually using the vibrator in any of the pictures, which I suppose I was thankful for. The final shot showed Louise leaning over dangling her boobs downwards with a just-lit cigarette in her lips. I quickly ran my eyes back over the previous pictures in this gallery. Louise was looking VERY aroused in most of the shots.
Shit, I was getting hard already. But actually, more than anything, I was pretty shocked. I was speechless for about a minute, the laptop still on my lap. Trying to take this all in.
When I closed the galleries and went back a page to where the intro section was, I noticed a reference to the date of the shoot, the location, and the photographer. The photographer's name was 'Brock Jensen'.
I put the laptop down. I needed to collect my thoughts.
Louise stubbed out her cigarette and lit another immediately.
I sighed. I was trying not to be too angry. But, fuck, I WAS angry. Don't shout, Ron, I told myself. That'll only make things worse.
Eventually I managed to speak. I kept the loudness and tone of my voice under control. I think.
"Louise, what the fuck were you thinking?!?" I asked. "These pictures. Glamor? They're fucking porn! Jesus! They're almost fucking hardcore! What were you thinking?"
"Don't pretend you're a prude, Ron. Don't fucking patronize me like that. You cannot do that to me. I won't stand for it."
"What??? But, Louise I never agreed.."
"Ron, agreed? AGREED!?!? What the fuck do you mean, 'AGREED'??? I didn't ask you to agree to anything! And you know why? Not because I thought you'd say 'no'. No, it wasn't that. It was because I don't fucking need to ask you for permission for anything."
"But Louise.."
"Fuck, Ron, stop with the 'But Louise' bullshit already!"
I paused. I let out a sigh. Tried to collect my thoughts.
"Louise, I don't like this."
"What about when we did the photo session with Carmella?"
"That was different! It was, what was it, eh, boudoir, just for us."
"Ron, these new ones are pretty tame. Compared to what we did, and even by the standards of contemporary pornography. And what we did with Carmella was definitely much stronger."
"But that was JUST FOR US!"
"Whatever, Ron. You know, I am going to be a model. What I should have done when I was younger. A proper model, I mean, Ron. I am not going to be a pornstar. But I will not let you stop me being a model."
"When did I ever fucking stop you being a model, Louise?"
"You just did. It happened. We happened. It stopped me."
"Fuck off, Louise. Like you stopped me being a Major League shortstop? That was never gonna happen."
"Fuck you, Ron. I could have been a model. Easy. I know I could have been, and you know what, Ron, I WILL be a model."
"THAT kind of model, Louise? Those pictures.."
"I need pictures like this in my portfolio, and I don't care if you like it or not. It's not my entire model portfolio."
"Fuck, Louise. NO! Those pictures. Jesus! The gynecological ones! What the fuck do you think that is? Modelling?!? Jesus! It's the textbook definition of porn! It's like you're auditioning for MILF porn!"
"You should know Ron! You dated an actual fucking MILF pornstar. That fucking fat skeeze! Shall we go to that bitch's website and compare? You can jerk off remembering all those times you fucked her!!"
"Fuck you, Louise! That's.. that's .. we said.. We.. the past stays in.."
"FUCK the past, Ron. You're a fucking hypocrite. You think I don't know what you do? Well, I don't actually know, but I am pretty fucking sure that you have not stopped seeing other people. The thing is, Ron? You know what? You fucking know WHAT? I don't FUCKING CARE WHAT YOU DO! Not anymore!"
"But Louise.."
"Don't Ron. Fucking leave it. Or, well, .. fucking forget it, Ron, I'm going to bed."
"But Louise, I.."
"Ron, I'm going to bed. I know you're turned on. I can tell. I can always tell. That fucking weird thing you have going on, like when you watched me fucking other guys. But, do NOT try to fuck me tonight."
"But Louise.."
"Ron, so help me God, if you say 'But Louise' one more FUCKING TIME, I will go into the kitchen, find the sharpest knife we have, or maybe a blunt one, and I will CUT YOUR FUCKING BALLS OFF!"
"Eh.. the.."
"Ron. Stop! We'll talk about this tomorrow night. I am doing an early evening virtual viewing for a couple looking for a place in East Westchester. I'll be home about 8. We will talk then. But not now! TOMORROW!"
Louise then stood up, picked up her cigarettes and lighter, and walked upstairs.
I waited maybe five minutes, then picked up Louise's laptop. Luckily, I didn't need to re-enter the password Louise had used, because I hadn't actually seen what she'd typed in. I revisited my wife's erotic picture portfolio. After a minute or two I pulled my dick out and masturbated, feverishly, until I had an intense orgasm, only just managing not to spurt all over Louise's keyboard.
Then I went to bed in the spare room.
==
The following night was when things changed. Everything changed. My life changed. Completely.
I still struggle to come to terms with it. How suddenly it happened. Or how I absolutely had not seen it coming.
Louise had said during our 'discussion' the previous night that she was doing a house viewing in the early evening. I cooked dinner, well, I heated up Pizza, put the boys to bed, then Louise arrived home about 8:45pm.
We ate, I microwaved what was left of the pizza, not really talking much. You know that post-fight silent protocol, one of us waiting for the other to speak first, to apologize, whatever. When we'd finished, Louise put the plates in the dishwasher and sat down on the couch. I sat down next to her. We still didn't speak for about another five minutes.
Louise seemed to be acting tensely. She was a bit off. I could tell something was not right.
Eventually, she stood up, lit a cigarette, and then turned and looked at me seriously.
"Ron, I'm leaving you. I want a divorce."
"WHAAATTT?!?" I replied in astonishment.
"Ron, I just told you. I want a divorce."
"Louise, what the fuck! WHY?!? Is this about last night?"
"No. It's not you, Ron. It's me."
"What the fuck do you mean, 'It's not you, it's me'? What does THAT mean?"
"Ron, I don't love you anymore."
"What?"
"Ron, I'm sorry, the easiest way for us to do this is for me to be honest. You'll accept things better if I tell you exactly how it is. Don't try and persuade me to stay with you. It's not happening. It would not make a single bit of difference if you got down on your knees and pleaded with me. And I don't want you to humiliate yourself. I do NOT want to see that."
"But Louise .."
"Ron. I've fallen in love with someone else. Another man. I love him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. He feels the same way."
"Who? Who the fuh.."
"Brock."
"Brock?"
"He's my photographer."
"Who, eh, how.."
"His name is Brock Jensen. You don't know him. Carmella introduced us. It started out professionally. But I knew from the start. God, it took me nearly a month to get him into bed. After that first act of physical love, I knew he was the one."
"Louise, why didn't you.."
"What, Ron? Why didn't I what?"
"We could have talked?"
"There was nothing to talk about, Ron. My mind was made up. THIS is the talk."
"How long has this being going on?"
"Long enough. Long enough for me to know he's the one."
"But, Louise, the sex, we have, we.. it.."
"Ron, I'm surprised you didn't notice. The sex between us, it changed. For me anyway. For me it became totally physical. No emotions. I mean, Ron, I'll never ever say you're not good in bed. And obviously, you know how much I LOVE sex. But didn't you notice? My dirty talk? The fact we kissed less while we were doing it. For me, it just became casual sex. Like I used to do, before we became a thing. Only now, it was with you. I mean the casual sex, it was with YOU. There was no more emotion for me. No feelings. Just your cock. And then, well, I even stopped enjoying that. All I wanted was Brock. Not you. Only him."
"Louise, this is too fucking much to take in. I don't understand."
"Ron. I didn't want the sex between us to be you making love to me, and me imagining it was actually Brock, the man I've fallen in love with, making love to me, instead of you. He knew we were still fucking. But he dealt with it.
"Ron, when I was younger, I had lots of sex before I met you, you know that, and I'd say 90% of the time I just wanted to be fucked properly by a nice-looking guy's hard cock. I didn't want to be the guy's girlfriend, I just wanted him to fuck me, and then not bother me afterwards. I didn't want to go on dates with them. Of course, sometimes I did. The older guys especially knew how to treat a woman.
"When you came along, I'd say our first six months were like that. For me at least. Ron, I still slept with other guys in that first six-month period we were dating. YOU never knew, and I never told you until now. It dawned on me one day back then that you were different to most other guys. The way you unconditionally loved me. The way we talked, about everything, including sex. How you seemed to accept my sexual character, not judge me, not think I was some kind of slut. And I changed. And I fell in love with you. I mean the me 'then' fell in love with the you 'then'. I stopped fucking other guys. It became just me and you."
I was now sitting there in stunned silence. I didn't really know what to say. I definitely did not want to get too angry. I didn't know what I'd do if I actually 'Lost it'. Strangely, though, I didn't feel THAT Angry. I don't know why. Maybe I'd known that this day would be coming.
Louise carried on talking.
"Ron, all those years ago, I changed. Because I met you. Because I fell in love with you. Now, I've fallen in love with Brock. And there's nothing I can do about it. I've changed again. I have to be with him. I have to. I'm sorry, Ron. I have to leave you."
"Louise, how are we.. I mean, the logistics? You say you're leaving me. You want me to move out? How the fuck.."
"No, Ron. I'm moving in with Brock. Tonight actually. You have the boys for the weekend. I've told my mom what's happening. We obviously need to take care of the kids in all of this. My mom's going to take care of them the next couple of weeks until we sort things out. I'll go to work, you go to work, mom will take care of things here. With the boys. Or at her place. They can stay over at my mom's even. Oh, but next weekend I'll need you to have the boys. Brock and me are going away for the weekend. And my mom has a Golf tournament."
"Wait. So, Louise, you discussed this with your mom? But not me?"
"Ron, we're discussing it now. But I didn't want this to be a long dragged- out period of us not talking, arguing all the time. I don't know, fucking writing each other notes. It's best that I go immediately. We'll talk tomorrow. I'll call you. 6pm or thereabouts. I'm sorry, Ron, but I have to do this."
"But Louise.."
"Ron, I also need to make one thing clear. This has NOTHING to do with how we behaved these last couple of years. Last few years. This has nothing to do with all those guys you had sex with. Sorry, we had sex with. Or all of the women. It's nothing to do with Donna, that dirty whore, or with Shawna, who I think you secretly love. Or any of the people we had sex with together. Your tranny thing? I don't care about any of that now. That's who you are. Ron, I had a lot of fun when we were, you know, 'swinging'. I didn't like all of it, especially at the start. But it did become fun.
"But Ron, let me just repeat, this is NOTHING to do with that. After I met Brock, I stopped caring about anything else. You and me, we kept on having sex, but it was different, for me at least. It was like a habit. And it bought me time. To be ready to tell you. Like I'm telling you now. You know, I actually secretly hope that you are doing things with other people. I think it's part of your personality. You need to, well, you need to have women, or shit, I guess these days it's men too, who WANT you. It validates your personality. Who you are. It's like you're half a person if you're on your own. I hoped that it would make this easier for you. If you were cheating on me. Like I was cheating on you. If you had maybe fallen in love with someone else. Like I have. Ron, I have to go. I'm sorry, but life is too short, and we're both at an age where we can both move on. I hope you CAN move on. I truly do. It's not too late."
There wasn't really much I could say after that.
Louise walked over to the front door and picked up her car keys and her jacket.
"I'll call you tomorrow, Ron. Have a think about things. I'm not taking the house or anything, I don't care about that. I'm not fighting for sole custody of the kids, or anything like that. Let's try and end this amicably. I'm seeing an attorney Monday. I suggest you also get yourself a lawyer."
Louise opened the front door, and walked out, the door swinging shut behind her with a dull click. I half thought about standing up, running after Louise, telling her that I loved her. But I just sat on the couch in silence.
And that was it. Just like that, my marriage was over.
I felt numb. But was I really shocked? I realized that somewhere deep inside I'd known that this day was coming. I couldn't even bring myself to cry. Maybe it was for the best.
TO BE CONTINUED?
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