Introduction: Hap was my best friend for almost four years of high school and together, along with our friend Greg, we were known as the three musketeers. Wherever there was one of us, the other two were sure to be close by. We were inseperable and talked openly about all our inner thoughts and we kept nothing secret. Well, there was one secret I was keeping to myself: the secret of being gay.
The funny thing is, I wasn't the only one keeping that secret. Little did I know until October of 2000, that Hap was also gay. We were both so good at hiding it, that neither of us suspected the other. I guess what they say about having gaydar is a lot of bull. One day last October, Hap decided to come out of the closet to Greg and me. I guess he felt our friendship was strong enough to share. Hap had also come out to his parents that month and was relieved that both his parents were supportive. When Hap sat us down and confessed, I was shocked. I've always thought of Hap like a brother, and even though he was incredibly sexy, I never really thought of us together. I didn't know what to do about telling him I was gay also. I told him our friendship was still in good standing, as did Greg.
That night I called Hap and told him I needed to speak to him in person about the news he dropped on Greg and me. We met at the local Dennys (major hangout for the Three Musketeers,) and sat at our usual table in the back. I didn't say anything at first, but sat there quietly sipping my soda and looking at Hap. Hap finally broke the silence and told me he knew what I was going to say; that I thought about it and decided I didn't want to be his friend. I started laughing, took a deep breath, and told him, "Not even close!"
My exact words were, "Hap, I wish I knew this four years ago. There wouldn't have been so much time wasted."
He looked at me and I knew what I said didn't register. I said, "Hap, I'm gay too."
We both sat in silence for the next few minutes and then, almost at the same time we said, "Poor Greg. He took the news about one of us. How will we feel when we tell him two out of three are gay.
Hap immediatly called Greg on his cell phone, and within 20 minutes, Greg joined us. Hap was the one who broke the news to Greg and Greg didn't say a word. He just stared at the both of us. He then half smiled and said that as far as he was concerned, he could live with us being gay, if we could live with him being straight. We wound up laughing about his comment, and relieved that our four year friendship was still intact. We also decided that since we live in a "redneck" town, we needed to keep it our little secret.
We left Denny's well after midnight and Greg went home and I went to Haps. It was a regular habit that the three of us would alway crash at Hap's or my house on the weekend, and it was one of the few times it wound up just being Hap and me. I followed Hap in my car and I don't even remember driving to his house. My thoughts were focused on the fact that after all these years of keeping my secret, I finally felt relieved that my secret was out, at least to my two best friends. I had no thoughts of Hap and I "getting it on," as it was still overwhelming just finding it out about him and he finding out about me.
We were up most of the night just talking and trying to figure out why neither of us had a clue to the other's secret. As the conversation went on I started thinking that Hap and I would "get it on", but then he kind of dropped a bomb on me. He admitted he had always had "a thing" for Greg. I was crushed. Here I was thinking Hap an I were going to become one, and he's telling me he has a thing for Greg. I didn't say anything to Hap, but in the morning, I left before Hap was awake and spent the rest of the weekend avoiding his phone calls.
Monday morning, back in school, I tried as bet I could to avoid Hap, but he caught up with me at lunch. He wanted to know what happened and I told him that I wasn't sure about the feelings I had inside, and just needed time to think. The week continued without us saying anything more, but on Friday, Hap asked me to spend the weekend at his house since his parents were going to be away. I told him I would, but I was reluctant to share with him that what he said about Greg was bothering me. Hap, Greg, and I went out to dinner that night and during dinner, Hap told Greg that he and I were spending the weekend together to build on our relationship, and informed me that he had fallen in love. Back at Hap's house, we proceeded with small talk, and before I knew what was happening, Hap leaned over and kissed me. He caught me by surprise at first, but as he was kissing me, I could feel my body start to tingle and before I knew it, my hardon was trying to escape from it's prison. Hap started to remove my shirt and I followed by removing his. His hands exploring my body made me melt, and as he started unbuckling my pants, I knew I was in love and that Hap was only thinking of me. He started kissing my nipples, sending shivers up my spine and as he proceeded to move down, I just lay there, not knowing what to expect next. Hap reached for my hardon and gently started to jack me off, making me moan. As I spread my legs wider, he lowered his head and took my dick in his mouth. Now I've gotten a blow job from a girl before, but having Hap on my cock was the first time I ever experienced true feelings. It was amazing how turned on I had become. My head was spinning as he continued to suck on my cock and as I felt my dick swell up I warned him that I was going to cum any minute.
He proceeded to clamp down on my dick and take it deeper into his throat when I felt myself explode. I have never experienced an orgasm so intense and it felt like my heart was going to burst as well. Hap stayed on my cock as I began to get soft and when he finally released me from his mouth, he lay next to me and we started kissing. As I took his tongue in my mouth, I could taste the saltiness of my cum. When he looked into my eyes, I knew that I was in love and I started reaching into his pants to return the favor.
Hap told me he just wanted to lay in my arms for a few more minutes and just feel our warmth. As I never had experience with a guy before I was a little nervous, and so just lying in nhis arms was fine with me.
We continued to embrace and we didn't say anything to one another. I needed to use the bathroom, so I joking told Hap not to lose the pose, and I got up to relieve myself. When I returned, Hap was laying there naked.
As we've seen each other naked before, either in the lockerroom or on weekends, I never thought anything of it until now. Seeing his beautiful body naked before me brought an instant hardon and I got back into bed and I got on top of Hap, kissing his mouth, his neck, moving down to his chest, tonguing his navel and continuing down to his cock, which I could see was ready for my mouth. Trying to copy what Hap had just done to me, I took him into my mouth and proceeded to perform my first blowjob. I licked and sucked him reaching underneath him to grab his ass, and taking all seven inches of him slowly towards the back of my throat. He put his hands on my head and proceeded to face fuck me. After about ten minutes he warned me that he was going to cum and told me I didn't have to keep him in my mouth if I didn't want to. I grabbed his ass tighter and held on as I felt him begin to explode into my mouth. I took most of it down my throat, although I had trouble taking all of it. After he finished, I licked his dick clean, and proceeded to lick his balls where some had dripped. When I went to kiss him he laughed and told me I missed a few spots, and he proceeded to lick his cum from the corners of my mouth and again, we lay together in an embrace and before I knew it, he was asleep with his face buried in my neck. For the first time, I truly felt I was in love, and I remember thinking that although we had been friends for four years, we had a lot of catching up to do.
This is my first attempt at writing, and although I usually don't kiss and tell, this story had to be told. Soon after our first time, we made plans to spend the rest of our lives together. As we were both graduating from high school this June, we were planning to attend colleges in Massachusetts and get an apartment together. Hap was going to become an Architect and I was planning on following in my fathers footsteps (because of his brainwashing) to become a lawyer.
As it turns out, it was discovered that Hap had a rare form of cancer and after fighting to beat it, Hap passed away this past March. As he knew the end was near, Hap and I spent his last months living together, thanks to the love and support of our families. About a week before Hap died, we were holding each other and Hap whispered in my ear: "It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all."
He's been gone six weeks and I can hear him saying that to me each night as I lay in bed. For those of you in love, if you feel it as strongly as we did, than you have truly been blessed.