----------------------------------------------------------------------------- Here's the next part of my story, thanx for the nice comments, I really appreciate them. Keep sending them to scoteg@yahoo.com. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------
True Love, part 2 -----------------
After 15 minutes I felt Matthew getting closer to me, his back was against mine. He turned around and now I could feel his chest resting against my back.
"You're asleep?" Matthew asked.
"Not really." I said.
"You know, you smell very good..." Matthew said.
I turned around and was now face to face with Matthew, our faces were almost touching.
"And you're so sexy..." he continued.
There was tension in the air and I knew what was coming. I didn't try to stop it. He placed a gentle kiss on my lips. We kissed for about five minutes when I turned around.
"What's wrong?" Matthew asked "Have I done something wrong? Don't you like it?"
"No, it's not that, but I just ..."
"Yes?" Matthew said.
"Well, I always thought I was straight and now this. I'm really enjoying this, you know" I said.
"So am I, so what's the problem then?"
"Nothing I guess..." I said.
"I see, well I think it's better that we try to get some sleep. We'll discuss this later. Ok?"
"Thanks, you're really sweet." I said.
"Goodnight Josh", Matthew said, giving me a kiss on my forehead.
"Goodnight Matthew..."
Gosh, this was so hard. A part of me wanted to make love to Matthew, but another part told me not to rush things. I had to think this over, that was a fact! I tried to sleep that night, but it just didn't work. When I was about to close my eyes, I always began thinking about what could have happened tonight and believe me that's not so difficult when the person you're thinking of, is lying next to you!
The next day, I woke up at 8 o'clock. I was alone because Matthew had to leave early this morning, I decided to pack my stuff and catch the train home so I could get some sleep. We didn't have class today, so that was ok. When I was ready to leave, I took some paper out of my bag and wrote a little note to Matthew.
-- Dear Matthew, I decided to go home, I'm very tired and I want to get some sleep. I think the only way for me to do that, is to sleep in my own bed :) So, I'll talk to you later. Bye, Josh --
I thought it was for the better not to say anything about last night, because I had to make up my mind first, before I could talk it over with Matthew. Jeez, I really had something to think about! The train ride wasn't very special, no one I knew was on it, and so I tried to get some sleep. Boy was I tired, I almost slept the whole train ride, almost missed my station but the lady in front of me was kind enough to wake me up.
"You really were tired." the lady said.
"Yeah, didn't sleep very well last night, thanks for waking me up." I said to her when I got up to reach the door.
It was difficult for me not to fall asleep on my bike on the ride home (you see, I always get to the train on my bike, it's not very far). When I got home, no one was there, so I could easily jump on my bed and sleep for a while, without the usual questions being asked about how my night was yesterday. I woke up again at 3 o'clock in the afternoon, partly because I was hungry, partly because I was thinking about Matthew. There was some soup left from last night, so I warmed that up and sat in front of the TV. There was some stupid movie on, you know the usual romantic movie where a boy has to win the love of this girl who's in love with another guy that likes another girl... It was kinda funny, so I watched the whole movie to see the romantic ending where the boy and the girl kiss each other and know that they are right for each other. I began thinking about Matthew again; I really liked him, that wasn't the problem. But the fact that liking him meant that I was gay, was another problem. I always considered myself pretty straight, I had plenty of girlfriends, but deep down inside I knew that there was something else inside me, I once thought maybe I'm bisexual but that thought disappeared as quickly as it came. So I went on with my life and always kept those feeling away, but last night I just didn't work, that has to mean something! I really liked Matthew! Why is this happening to me? I turned on my computer to check if I had some new email, maybe some from Matthew? I looked to the new email and there it was, the one I was hoping for...
-- Dear Josh, Just missed you this morning, I was a bit disappointed you already left. I hope you had the time to think things over by now, I really like you and you kinda gave me the feeling that you liked me too last night. Or is that just wishful thinking? I hope not... You know I really think we have to talk about this stuff. Will you reply this message as soon as possible? Love, Matthew --
I smiled when I read the message, it was then that I decided that I just had to go for it; I like Matthew and he likes me, so there's no problem. I picked up the phone and dialled Matthews number.
"Hello."
"Matthew?" I asked.
"Yep, who's this?"
"Hi, it's me Josh. I said.
"Hi, what a nice surprise. So I guess you got my email?" Matthew said.
"Indeed, it was really sweet."
"Well, it is just what I feel!" Matthew said. "So, you're doing something tonight?"
"No, I'll probably watch some TV or something..."
"You wanna do something together, maybe we can catch a movie?" Matthew asked.
"I'd really love to, but not tonight. I'm still really tired, I didn't get very much sleep last night."
"I see, well I'm sorry for that." Matthew said.
"You're sorry?" I asked.
"Yeah Josh, you know for kissing you. Sorry, I shouldn't have done it."
"No, it's ok. It takes two people to kiss each other." I said.
"So you mean, you liked it to?" I heard him say with a bit of hope in his voice.
"Damn' right I did, who wouldn't" I joked.
"Cool, you don't know how good this sounds to me." Matthew shouted.
"Calm down there, if you continue like that, your parents will be knocking at your door within minutes."
"Ok, I just really was excited! You really mean it?" Matthew asked again.
"Yeah I do, I really like you..."
"I do to, so I guess I'll see you tomorrow then?" Matthew asked.
"Sure, I wouldn't miss it for the world!"
"I'll keep you a seat next to me in class. Bye Josh."
"Bye Matthew."
I was very happy, all my problems were history. Tomorrow I was going to see Matthew again!!! I fell asleep a few minutes later and I dreamed about... well I don't have to explain about who I dreamed!
To be continued...
----------------------------------------------------------------------------- I know it isn't very long, but the next part will be ready soon. Meanwhile, keep sending your comments to scoteg@yahoo.com. I love reading them! -----------------------------------------------------------------------------