THE STORY OF US BY: Julien
This story is 100% fictional and is by no means depictive of the life of any person, place or thing. It contains sexual activities between males and should only be read if it is legal to do so in your area. Read at your own risk and enjoy. Comments are welcomed and would be very much appreciated. ENJOY!
I would like to thank my editor Frank for doing such a great job on editing - thanks a lot man...
MICHAEL
As my eyes adjusted to the light around me, I became painfully aware that something was amiss. I didn't know what it was yet but I had this feeling that kept telling me that something was not right. It could have been the fact that the lilac wallpaper was not that of my own apartment or that the massive French doors came nowhere close to resembling my wooden ones. But what gave it away, what really gave it away was the pair of white boxers that was folded neatly on the chair closest to the bedroom door. I knew damn well that I didn't wear boxers and that I was in no way a neat freak so I had to assume that the boxers and the surrounding property belonged to someone else. And as if on cue, he spoke up.
"You're awake. Good. You want milk and sugar with your coffee? I'm also making breakfast, you have a choice of oatmeal with toast or eggs and bacon." He stated, crossing over from the bathroom into the bedroom with a towel that barely managed to cover his waist.
I sat up and rubbed my eyes in a move to ensure that I wasn't imagining things.
"Michael, you ok?" He asked again, this time stopping to cast a long look my way. One filled with obvious concern.
"Yeah, thanks." I replied trying to clear my head in an effort to remove the cloudiness and somehow remember what had happened between us the night before.
I couldn't think though, not with him parading in front of me half naked, already making a tempting situation more appealing.
"Put on some clothes will you." I stated a little too harshly. He stopped rummaging through a closet and turned to look at me, a look of anxiety written all over his face.
"Yeah...sure." And with that he pulled on a t-shirt and a pair of faded blue jeans. He walked back into the bathroom and reappeared shortly holding a fresh towel and washcloth in one hand.
"Here. You're free to take a shower if you want, I'll be outside." And before I could respond, he walked out of the room and closed the door gently behind him.
As soon as he left, I held my hand in my head and began to silently curse myself, 'you fucking idiot! What have you gone and done now!"
And it was as if that chiding had brought it all back.
I remembered us eating dinner, talking and actually laughing as if we were the best of friends. I remember the bottle of wine I had insisted we order and I remember the repeated refill of vodka afterwards. I remember insisting that we ride back together in my car instead of him taking a cab. I remember him taking the wheel and then me passing out. It didn't take a lot of deduction to figure out the rest of the story. We obviously had sex last night, and a lot of it judging by the number of used condoms not too carefully concealed in the trashcan beside the bed. And I couldn't help but think that I was being a real asshole by starting this shit with Adam again. I didn't want a repeat of what went down between us in New York. I didn't need all that drama around me right now but obviously it was here and I knew I had to deal with it before things had an opportunity to get out of hand.
I grabbed the towel and washrag from a nearby chair and headed for the shower.
He stood by the stove pretending to pay attention to the bacon frying in the pan but I knew that was the least important thing on his mind, it had to be. I had come into the kitchen all geared up to thank him for a wonderful night and for his hospitality, but one look at his face told me that that just wasn't the way to go. This wasn't just a nameless trick who had brought me home for the night, it was someone who believe it or not, I cared a great deal about, even if it didn't seem like it.
"Adam, about last night." I started.
"Forget it."
"No, I'm sorry about everything. I..."
"Shit Michael! I said forget it!" His voice had risen at least an octave and I could make out a prominent vein in his neck.
"Fine." I replied, quietly avoiding his eye.
"You know what, I don't even know why I bother anymore. It's like I'm wasting my time with you. I know you don't want to have a thing to do with me and I still keep trying to push shit..." and as he rambled on, it became clear to me that there was more to this that met the eye.
"What are you talking about Adam?" I asked.
"I knew it was you." He stated firmly.
"What do you mean you knew it was me?" I challenged.
"When Dave told me about his mystery friend, he showed me a photo of you. I knew from the get go that it was you and I still went ahead with the plan."
"But why..."
"Because...because I can't get it through my thick scull that me and you are through." And that simply confession on his part threw me for a loop. I had long ago assumed that Adam had moved on to bigger and better things and that I was just a distant memory for him but obviously, I had been wrong.
He moved away from me and towards the stove, turning off the heat under the frying pan. His back was towards me but I could tell that he had grown tense. His shoulders seemed stiff and he refused to move from his position.
"That's not true." I proclaimed waking over to where he stood and placing a hand on his shoulder.
He didn't turn around but he didn't throw my hand off of his shoulder either, "What isn't true?"
"That I didn't want to have anything to do with you. That's bullshit."
"You could have fooled me."
I sighed. Of course he was right. I had treated Adam less than admirable and that was of course right up my alley but unlike the times and men before, I actually felt guilty about it.
"I know I acted like the biggest asshole there ever was and I gave off the impression that I didn't care, but it wasn't like that."
He shook his head and started to laugh. He shook my hand off his shoulder and turned around to face me, a cold glare added to his features. "And what was it like Michael? You sure as hell didn't treat me like you gave a damn. It was 'wham, bam, thank you ma'am' and you were gone. So don't stand in front of my face and tell me that it wasn't like that."
He pushed his way past me and headed for the bedroom closing the door behind him. And as I watched him go, the only thought I had was this, 'what the hell did he expect from me.' But that wasn't a question I was ready to confront yet, not now anyway. Besides, it was too damn early in the morning to be getting so fucking analytical.
RICHIE
Another day of this and I would lose my mind. Three days in a row I had stayed with Bobby and did nothing except eat, sleep and the obvious (yes folks - you know what I'm talking about - the three letter word we all call S-E-X). Not that I was complaining mind you. It felt great to be able to do nothing all day but after a while it got stale and the magic of it all was eventually lost. And besides, it wasn't all that fun when my boyfriend was out running the streets playing CIA operative when he thought I was asleep. The only reason I hadn't confronted him about his MIA routine yet was because I wanted to give him the opportunity to tell me what was on his mind rather than confronting him. For me, it was all a matter of trust. And I trusted Robert Knight to the fullest - or at least that was what I kept telling myself every time I would wake up to an empty bed after a night of illustrious lovemaking. Not to say that I didn't have my suspicions for I did, I just refused to believe that he was having an affair with someone else. But on the fifth day in a row that I woke up cold and alone, I had had it and I wanted answers. Confronting him was not an option and invading his privacy by scanning through his beeper numbers was something I was not prepared to do so the next best thing would have been to do what any suspicious spouse would do.
I waited for him to quietly make his exit the next morning and then I followed him in a cab. The cab driver must have thought I was going mad by my frantic shoutings of 'keep up' and 'don't lose him' that I kept repeating throughout the entire ride. Finally he slowed down and so did we. I handed the cabby a twenty and made my exit, barely managing to avoid being caught. Bobby's' head moved from side to side as he made his way to a subway stop and waited.
Ten minutes went by and nothing, then all of a sudden, "Where the fuck have you been!" Bobby called out making a mad dash across the street.
From my vantage point behind a bodega, I was barely able to make out the figure of another person. I tried to cross the street among the busy six A.M. traffic and was almost beheaded by a flat bed truck that had an improperly secured load of sheeting and wood. Ensuring that I was still in tact, I ducked into a nearby park and was rewarded with the traveling voices.
"You got it?" One voice asked. And I knew I had heard it somewhere before but I couldn't put a face to that callous tone.
"Yeah. Where the fuck were you this morning? I don't got time to be wasting with your ass." Bobby said, the anger ever present in his voice.
"Watch it Bobby, after all, you don't want to push my ass too far. You never know what I might do with it or who might see it." And then he laughed and it was like a light bulb went on in my head.
Son of a Bitch.
"You know if you weren't such an asshole we coulda had such a beautiful relationship. You could have had all the ass you could ever dream of." And I had to restrain myself from jumping out and killing him.
"I don't want none of what you're peddling." Bobby growled.
"Yeah, well too bad. You're paying me, you might as well have been fucking me, getting your moneys worth."
I was waiting for Bobby's reply but he didn't have one.
"See you next month sweet cakes." Ernie said making a smacking noise with what I imagined were his lips before disappearing across the street and into the crowd.
I didn't see Bobby follow him so I assumed he was still there. And I thought that this time was as good as any to confront him about what had just gone down. I stepped out of my hiding spot and just as he was about to cross the street, I called out to him. He turned to the sound of my voice and his face fell.
"What the fuck!" He called out walking towards me.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I inquired.
"What the hell are you doing here Richie? What the hell is wrong with you? Are you following me?" he responded, his anger very apparent but I refused to back down. This had to be dealt with and it had to be dealt with right now.
"Yes. I followed you."
"Fuck! Fuck!! You had no fucking right!!!"
"The fuck I didn't! You lied to me!" I cursed, unable to hold my anger in, "You're supposed to be my boyfriend and I'm supposed to be able to trust you."
"Fuck trust. Fuck Trust! And you know what Richie, fuck you too!" And with that he ran across the street, jumped into his SUV and sped off. And I stood there like a statue unable to move. I couldn't believe that this had just happened and I had been well and ready to concede that it was my fault until I did a quick replay of what had just gone down. And I thought, 'Hell no! I wasn't going to take the blame for this'. I was fed up with always having to be the peacemaker in our relationship. I mean, what gave him the right to talk to me like I was an insignificant speck of dust. He fucking lies and I'm to blame? And another thought popped into my head out of the blue, 'If that was really how he felt, then maybe we had no future together'. And it wasn't a surprise to me that five minutes later I found myself in the back of a livery cab, unable to stop the flow of tears that came.
BOBBY
As the midtown traffic caught up with me, I couldn't help but think back to what had transpired between Richie and me a few minutes ago. I admit I was a bit harsh but I was so fucking upset. I didn't mean for my anger to just brim over the surface like it did but having shit being thrown at me from all sides was just too much for me to have to deal with and as usual, I ended up taking my anger out on the one person I shouldn't have. I almost took the next side street in an attempt to turn around and go back to him but I didn't. Instead I continued home as if all was well with the world.
"So are we gonna deal with this or not?"
"We will, just not today."
"Why not?"
"Because I got shit to do Laurence."
He paused, sighed and then continued with, "Are you on drugs man, cause if you are, we can work on that. There's a treatment facility upstate that will clean you right up and no one has to know."
I almost laughed. "Fuck no I ain't on drugs! Why the fuck would you even ask me that man?"
"Because you ain't been acting like yourself. You're evasive when I ask you any questions concerning money and... just call it a gut feeling man. I been around the block a whole lotta times so I know when something is troubling a brotha. And brotha, something been done troubling you for a long damn time. You can trust me Bobby. Whatever it is, I want to help."
And I had to admit it was a welcome admission but what the hell could I have said to him. That I was fucking my ex-press man, paying off my ex-manager to keep quiet about the fact that we had fucked and I was afraid of losing everything I done worked for on something I wasn't even 100% sure of. Nah. I couldn't tell him any of that and if I couldn't tell him that, he couldn't help me.
"I'm fine man. I'm not on drugs."
"Then what is it? Why you been so evasive then."
"Because I.... I.... I'm not being evasive. I just feel like my finances is my business. You're a business man Laurence, you know the drill."
"Yeah I DO know the drill which is why I'm concerned. Answer me this Bobby, are you a liability to me. Be straight up brotha, be straight up. Should I be worried about investing my money and my reputation on you and your career?"
"Fuck no! I'm legit Laurence. Every part of me and I ain't no damn liability either. I just need some time to get my shit together, that's it. That's all I'm asking of you. Give me some space and some time." By this point I was practically begging him. I needed for him to believe in me.
"Fine. You got your time but I'm gonna eventually want answers about what's happening. Don't be letting me pick up some fucking tabloid and reading about you inside. No matter what, let me hear it from you first, that's all I ask. You cool with that?"
"Yeah man, I'm cool. Listen, I got to get but I'll talk to you later in the week ok."
"Cool. I'm out."
"Peace." And I hung up. That was just too close for comfort. I had come home expecting to just be able to relax and then Laurence calls. Seems that some nosy ass accountant picked up on some of my withdrawing habits and voiced his concern to Laurence who in turn brought his concerns to me. And it made me mad. Why the fuck couldn't I do as I pleased with my fucking money when I was the one who had to work my ass off to get it. Who the fuck was he to question what I did with my hard earned cash. That was my thoughts in one breath but at the same time I could understand his concern, I was a commodity, and he had a vested interest in me and if I fucked up, he would be fucked too, so...
The doorbell rang and broke me out of my train of thought. I already knew who it was and took my time in answering it, maybe to prolong the inevitable or to give my thoughts an opportunity to get it together.
He stood in front of me, shoulders slumped and features distorted. I was about to say something when he spoke, "I'm not going to apologize Bobby. I hate always having to apologize for things that you do. I'm sorry I followed you but I was worried about you. You've been so secretive with me and I began to wonder if you were...I was wrong for that but...you shouldn't have kept that from me."
For a moment I thought he would actually lash out at me but instead he started to cry and it caught me off guard.
"Oh baby." I said pulling him into my arms and holding him tight, "Don't cry. Please baby, don't cry." I whispered over and over again while stroking the back of his neck with the palm of my hand. He gently rubbed his head in the crook of my neck and held unto my waist as if it were a life raft.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Richie. No more secrets, I promise you that, no more secrets." And I meant it. Now everything was out in the open and I felt a sense of relief that was not there before. It was if a chip had been lifted off of my shoulders.
"I know you are." He whispered.
And as if running on pure adrenaline I asked him a question that had been running through my mind the last few days now.
"Would you stick by me if I decided to just come out to everyone."
"What?" He looked up at me and took a step back.
"Would you stick by me if I decided to just come out to everyone. The media, Laurence, my fans, everyone. Would you still be there?"
"Yes." And the fact that he answered without much hesitation made my decision all the more easier to make.
"Good, because I think that's what I'm gonna do."
"Are you sure Bobby? I mean this is not something you can come back from."
"I know but I need to do this for me, for us. We're gonna keep on fighting over pointless shit like the situation with Ernie if I don't do this."
"And what about your career. I love you to death Bobby and I support whatever decision you feel you have to make but what about your music. I know you love singing and I can't see you going the rest of your life without it. It won't be pretty."
I kissed his forehead, "I know, my career will probably be over but who cares?" It hurt me to say those words but I wouldn't let him know that.
"Have you thought about it, I mean really sat down and thought about what it would mean?"
"Yes. I don't want Ernie to have this shit over my head forever. It's coming between the two things I care about the most, you and my sanity. If I'm out he won't have any leverage and he'll be the one left holding the bag. Who the hell is gonna want to hire him when they find out he's an extortionist. His ass will be left out there."
He sighed and reached for me again, "I know, I'm just afraid."
"Afraid of what?" I questioned.
"Afraid that this is a hasty decision and that you'll regret it after you do it."
"I won't." I ventured.
"You might."
I sighed, "Richie, let me ask you something. You love me?"
"Yes, with all my heart."
"And you trust me."
"Of course."
And no matter what happens. You'll be there for me?"
"Yes, always."
"Then I got nothing to worry about. As long as I got you, I got nothing to worry about." And even though those were powerful words, I had to keep repeating them over and over and over again in my head just to convince myself that I was ready to take the next step. Richie was right, there was no coming back from this. And as of this moment, I felt as if I had made that first crucial step by admitting what I needed to do and what I knew in my heart needed to be done. And as he held me, I closed my eyes and silently prayed that I was making the right decision.
HERE IS A QUESTION. WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK ABOUT BOBBY COMING OUT? I REALLY WANT TO KNOW BEFORE I START WRITING THE NEXT CHAPTER. ALSO LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS THINK SO FAR. COMMENTS, QUESTIONS, CRITICISMS ALWAYS WELCOMED. THANKS!!!