Disclaimer: This story is entirely fictional. Any resemblances to reality including: names, physical descriptions, actions, and events are purely coincidental. This story contains explicit sexual contents regarding consenting adults. If it is illegal for you to view such material, I suggest you stop reading now. If not, I hope you will enjoy reading it as much as I did writing.
NOTE: I apologize for the delay of this chapter. School had been incredibly consuming. But, gladly, summer will come and I will be able to write on a more regular basis.
The Start of Something 7 T. Vincent
"Hello!! Troy, you still there?" Jesse's voice boomed through the phone.
I lay there scared and immobilized by the sound of Eric's voice. My back was still firmly placed against his body. We were so close to each other that I could hear his heart beat in synchronization with mine; we were so close I began to feel his hair raised and his blood circulating. He on the other hand, was so close he could probably hear Jesse's heartbeats! I didn't dare turn around and answer his question. My heart pumped so there was this huge ringing in my ears. I bet Eric was experiencing every sensation I was. After all, he was skin on skin next to me. I did not want to be in this position right now! Now would be the proper time for me to have a super power. To be able to freeze time and then rewind it to that moment when I would NOT pick up the fucking phone was my only wish. People's wishes never become reality. How the hell was I going to answer Eric's question? `Oh! Cam is nobody! Just the guy I'm dating. No big, right?' I lacked the fortitude to maintain decent composure around Eric already, now a high-pressure interrogation? How in the world was I going to properly explain any of this without looking like a complete selfish ass?
"Better answer your friend." Eric broke the silence. "First."
Noted! "Um hey Jesse. I'm still here. Listen, not a good time right now. I'll call you back later this afternoon." I wanted to stay as long on the phone with Jesse's as possible but inevitably...
"OH? Ha ha. I see, somebody's getting a morning fuck in aren't they?" If there was ever anytime in the world when the worst possible timing could occur, it would be this moment. Why couldn't Jesse just shut the hell up and end the conversation? I hung up, immediately.
I lay on my side feared to face Eric directly. I felt the bed moved and the blankets rolled off me. Eric must've sat up. Why couldn't I have drugged him right now? He grabbed my arm and rolled me over. He was staring, intensely. I haven't been guilt tripped like this since I was five and my parents caught me stealing.
"Cam was that guy that I met at the restaurant isn't he?" I paused at his question, still guilt-ridden and a bit cornered. So I nodded. "And you're dating him?" Another nod. "So, what am I to you?" Fuck! No, not a fuck. Why couldn't it have been a yes or no question? I lay there and thought about my answer. I knew what it was; I just didn't know how to properly place it. I wished my feelings would get hurt instead.
"You're..." This pause sucked. "You're very attractive." What the hell did I just say?
"I don't think that was my question." I know it wasn't your question smart ass!
"Well, I like you." I saw changes in facial expressions, maybe this was the right answer.
"So, if you like me then am I your boyfriend?" He smirked. Oh! Thing were looking up for me. Shit! I didn't know how to answer this next question. Maybe I should just say that.
"I don't know. I'm sorry Eric. I should've told you about Cam."
"Then why didn't you?"
"Because I like you and I didn't want to hurt your feelings."
He paused for a while and solemned, "Can't say it doesn't." We sat there for what felt like an eternity. I haven't even gone out with him yet. Then why did this felt like a break-up? Why did it feel like he was about to attack me?
"I love you." Oh no. I would've preferred anything over this. Wait, this was a good statement. Albeit really strange, it was a good thing to hear. But, what should I say? Before I was able to formulate a possible reply, Eric continued, "But I don't think this would work Troy." I felt my muscle tension gave way and all of my functions shut down. "I don't want to compete and I don't want to have to compete. I was expecting you to be honest with me but you weren't." I mouthed what appeared to be `I'm sorry,' but I was pretty sure it was meaningless.
Eric sat there and simply looked at me. I couldn't tell if he was questioning the sincerity of my apology or if he was seething with anger. After a while, he spoke again, "I would've like what we could've possibly had. I just can't imagine..."
I took a deep breath and jumped out of the bed. I hastily dressed and desperately tried to just leave as quickly as possible. Call me selfish, call me immature, call me whatever; I just didn't feel like I was capable of hearing what he was about to say and absorb them healthily. This was me being dumped and he was trying as hard as he could to soften the blow. Well, no matter what his efforts were, I didn't want to witness them. The faster my escape, the less I would have to engage in what would inevitably be more pain. Eric must've sensed what I was doing. I knew that he wasn't finished but did it matter anymore? We were. Having finished putting my clothes on I used whatever strength left in my legs and rushed out of the bedroom. Eric wanted to follow me but I moved too quickly for him. I could hear my name and "waits" and "please" but I couldn't be tempted. I ran through his house, kicked his husky off me, and fiddled with my car lock. Stupid keys. Stupid car. Why didn't I get the remote control when the salesman asked? I pulled out of his driveway and ignored his presence at the entrance. I stomped on the gas and just sped my way out of his corner, having ignored my boss and his stupid prostitute on the front yard. Probably was just his daughter. Whatever! Stupid wet, blurry vision.
I drove home in what felt like an eternity. My heart was racing so quickly that I had to take deep breaths just to calm myself down. At one point, I was intensely overwhelmed by how frightened, scared, and upset I was that I pulled over and learned to breathe again. I regained my composure and headed home. There I was, in my driveway, crying and hating myself. My face was still hot and burning and I was sweating profusely. Maybe it was because the sun heated my car. I ran into my house, undressed, and jumped into the shower. I wanted to soak and hopefully in the process, drown. How would one drown with a showerhead? Actually, I just wanted to relive how it felt to be in his arms again when we were in the shower.
I sat on my porch and ate my sandwich. Why was it so difficult for me to just tell him about Cam? Rationally, I think if I told Eric about Cam, he would be more understanding. Right? But, what if I told Eric about Cam right then and there when he had asked me, he would've dumped me in that theater. Right? At least I wouldn't have slept with him then and I wouldn't have felt like crap. Maybe I would have. What was there that would've made him said, "Sure thing Troy. You got a boyfriend but I still want you! Let's date!"? All these stupid thoughts gave me a headache. I just wanted to spend the rest of the day in bed or something. But I didn't. What was the point in moping around and sulking? If anything, that would've made me feel worse. I called Jesse.
"About damn time!" he bellowed.
"Can we have dinner tonight?" my voice was eclipsed compared to his. I could tell Jesse was excited I called.
"What's wrong?" How the hell did he know? I figured if you'd knew someone as long as we had, you could tell over the phone.
"I'll tell you over dinner."
"It's Cam isn't it?! That asshole did something didn't he?"
I chuckled a bit, "No, it's not Cam. It's someone else."
"Who? Did he hurt you? Or are you engaged with 3 kids and a dog?!" Jesse's anticipation mounted.
"No. Not engaged. Tell you tonight. I'll bring groceries."
"Oh, okay. I'll see you tonight. I hope you're not raped."
"I'm fine. Later." I hung up and just leaned back on the chair. I allowed my mind to wander about Eric. The whole situation was my fault. He did have pretty good reasons to be upset. I just didn't think THAT upset. Actually, he was a bit too upset. It wasn't like we were dating! We were just having sex and not even that much. If anything, I was gipped. And yet, he was already "In love!" How did he fall in love when he didn't even know me? I wasn't the one who rushed into things, he was. All of this was nothing but a stupid crush that went awry. Usually, I would have a crush on a guy and fixated on him for about three weeks. I'd ruminate about him and lay in bed night after nights fantasizing and masturbating to the concept of him and me. So, this one time, my fantasy actually came true and it shattered right in my face. I would've gotten over this already had I not became so vulnerable to this guy. I was right to begin with; another Eric did hurt me. Well, never again. Why should I become so emotionally attached to him anyways? He rejected me and made me felt as if I was the most horrible person in the world. There was never any reason for him to guilt me into feeling like this; I was aware that I did a bad thing by not telling him the truth but he shouldn't have been so directly vicious. He sat there and gutted me with his eyes and his "torn" emotions. And I allowed him. No! Never again. I won't be that vulnerable emotionally again; enough for a man to make me feel horrible. As if I didn't spill my heart out to him about my past. That wasn't enough of an indicator that I've felt hurt before. Probably even more than what he was feeling. Did I really deserve to feel so guilty? I took two Ibuprofens.
"Your total is $32.57." The cashier handed me my groceries. I made my ways to my car; having skipped sometimes and danced a bit. The moment I had finished stuffing my trunk my cell rang. Eric?
"Hey baby?!" Stop calling me that!
"Hey Cam. How are you? What's going on?"
"Nothing. Just finished a big part of the conference today. I miss you." Well, actually, just that made me feel a whole lot better. Cam was there for me (not literally) but at least he missed me. At least he didn't make me feel like I was a selfish shit! At least he didn't make me cry. Where was that Ibuprofen?! "Troy? You there?"
"I'm still here. I miss you a lot Cam. Come home!" Might as well act like a selfish shit.
"I wish! We could be in a hot tub or a pool right now sipping wine and kissing." Actually, that was a pretty good suggestion. Having considered my last foray in the pool ended in misery. Actually, why did they all have a pool?! Well, I bet my experience with Cam would be better than mine with Eric. Considering I will never hear from Eric ever again. Nor will Cam ever hear about Eric... ever.
"Please come home!"
"I wil soon baby. I'll be home around Tuesday evening. Want to spend the night with me?" Hell yes.
"NO! Come home earlier!" There was a point in everyone's lives when they need someone there to hear them whine and complain. I could pull this pouting act and this sad face thing all night and Cam would love every part of it. So I was going to, at least until he stopped me by telling me that I was a whiny little girl.
"Quit whining. I'll be home Tuesday evening and I have the rest of that week off. We can do everything you want."
"Everything?" This sugary, mopey, whiney shit was getting kind of old.
"Yes. I'll... compensate for being away for that many days."
"Okay. Well, spending the night with you will be compensation enough."
"Good. So, what are you doing tonight? It's only 5:15 ish there, you going out tonight?"
"Nah. Me and Jesse are cooking dinner. I'm actually on my way over to his house with the grocery."
"Well, you guys have fun. Tell Jesse I said hi. I'm gonna go take a shower and head out for drinks with the guys."
"Okay! Have fun! Bye!" The guys? Oh, probably those straight boys from the company. Somewhere I had hoped they would all elect to go to the stripper joint.
"Okay. Bye. I lov..." he paused. I was sure he was equally shocked as I was about that "slip." Last thing I need to hear was "I love you." Last time I heard that... Well, I was there. "I'd love to see you soon." That was by far the worst save I've ever heard. But I went along with it and hung up.
I got in my car and headed to Jesse's place. The entire time I just let my mind wander and searched for my feelings. Somewhere along the exchanges between Cam and myself, I lost my feelings. Should I feel elated and ecstatic that Cam was still in my life? Or should I mourn Eric?
"Should I be sad that Eric dumped me?" I spoke as Jesse opened the door.
"Um... Is this how we're greeting each other now?" He raised an eyebrow. "And who's Eric? Actually, just come in, white or red?"
"White."
We carried the groceries in to the kitchen, unpacked and Jesse poured me a glass. "So, who's Eric again?"
"Eric was the guy at the symphony." I started seasoning the pork chops. Jesse didn't say anything. He just glanced at me and continued to chop the vegetables. Pretty sure he was expecting me to continue; I was never good at telling stories. We drank our wine and I told Jesse about what happened with me and Eric. He didn't say much. I wished there would be some judgments being passed.
"So, obviously, Cam doesn't know about Eric." He pensively stuffed the pork chops.
"No. And at this point, I'm content with him not knowing." The heat of the kitchen must've gotten to me since I could see my perspirations landed on the counter.
"Do you think that's fair to Cam?" He glanced out of the corner of his eyes.
"No. I'm really afraid of actually being hurt now. Before, at least I didn't have anybody so there wasn't much being lost. Yesterday, I had two men, if I told the truth now, I'll have none. I don't think I could handle losing two guys in the span of less than a month. If anything... won't that look slutty?" Not that I really minded if it did seem slutty.
"Just a bit." That made me smile; at least somebody was honest (definitely not me).
We put dinner in the oven and headed outside; Jesse had a cute little backyard with all these trees and flowers. I sat down and thought about how fair it was to Cam. Jesse didn't say anything but I knew he wanted to. He probably felt that the timing wasn't right. I personally didn't mind the criticism; considering I was at fault.
Jesse walked around and squirted his plants, "Don't be so sad. You're just blowing things out of proportions and so did Eric."
"You really think so?"
"Yeah. You just met this guy for a day and slept with him. Then he freaked out because he found out accidentally, partly my fault, that you're also seeing another guy. I don't think it sounds bad. I think you're just exploring your options. He sounded like an incredibly possessive and jealous person."
I never thought of Eric as possessive or jealous. I attributed those traits mainly to Cam; in fact, it wasn't even fair to attribute any personality traits to Cam. I knew more about Eric than I did Cam. That was my fault more than anything. Cam and I rarely spoke about him, which was odd for newly dating couples. When we were out, all Cam was interested in was me. He wanted to make sure he knew where I went to school, who my parents were, my goals and aspirations; but never would he talk about himself. Maybe he just didn't like to talk about himself because he was still "coming out." No... Could that be it? Would someone who was in the process of coming out rather wanted, at least, anybody, to talk to about it?
"How are things with you and Hank?" I changed the subject. I figured enough moping, dinner with friends was supposed to be good occasions. Plus, talking about Eric wouldn't make me feel any better; I would just feel deflated.
Jesse smacked, "It's going pretty well. We're taking things slow right now." Maybe talking about Jesse's new relationship wasn't the best thing either. I felt a bit jealous at the moment. I was sure Jesse could sense it. He reverted back to the Cam. "Cam's been away for a day now huh?" What the hell kind of question was that?
I stared at him a bit bewildered and relatively confused why he asked. Jesse continued, "You miss him?"
"A bit."
"Well, have I a surprise for you because he's in the living room right now waiting for you!" Jesse bellowed.
"WHAT?!" I jumped out of my seat.
"HA HA. Just kidding! Thought I'd at least raise your mood a bit." He laughed and sat down on the swing with me. We spent the whole night chatting about random things and lamented nonexistent relationships. Jesse had a good point about my relationship with Eric. It was completely different from my relationship with Cam and our interactions. He had me make a list of who was better and in what aspect. Needless to say it was the stupidest list I've ever made. First, clearly Eric was better in bed. I haven't had Cam, yet. Second, Eric was better at shower sex. All Cam did was peeked at me in there, surely he could've done more. Third, Eric was better at pool sex; Cam has a pool. Honestly, the list of things Jesse wanted to do was stupid. They all involved sex. I felt like the list pertained more to Jesse than me. On a completely non-sexual level, I couldn't begin to rank them. Who was better kisser? Who had a better penis? Who had a nicer body? Okay, on an actual non-sexual list, I still couldn't compare or contrast the two. Regardless, Eric was now out of the picture. No more Eric. No more great kisses, great penis, great body. But now I get Cam; so plenty of great kisses, great penis (eventually), and great body.
Ring. I jumped from my sofa after sitting there and stared outside for thirty minutes. Cam was home. Well, not home but he was here. I opened the door and looked at my handsome guy, standing there in his shorts and T-shirt with a grin. I lunged, grabbed his head, and planted the biggest, sloppiest, and horniest kiss. He just smiled as he tried to fight back my lips. We stood at my entrance and made out for quite a while. I've waited the whole weekend and Monday for him to come back. Truth be told, I missed Cam; it was nice when Cam was around. I took the rest of the week off so that I could be with Cam. We didn't exactly plan any vacations seeing as how he just got back from one. Maybe we should go to the beach or something.
Cam the surprised me by picking me up and carried me into my house, all the while maintaining our lip-lock. He might've been gone for a few days but it sure felt like a long century. He laid me down on my couch and proceeded to run his hands up my shirt and played with my nipples. I moaned and it spurred him even more. Cam's body pressed onto mine as he used his thighs to spread my legs. Pretty smooth transition if you asked me. I held his face tightly as we make out like high school kids. Cam ran his hand down to my butt, hoisted me up, and pressed his obvious hard-on against the crevice of my butt. Instinctively, I wrapped my legs around his waist. Maybe Jesse was right, people didn't learn bottoming; they were born hoisted. Each time Cam would lash my tongue with his he would thrust against me and I would flinch. Whatever happened to taking things slow Cam?
He broke our kiss, sat up, and gasped for air. He spoke, staggering through his breath, "Wow... did... something... happen... baby?" If you only knew. I just smiled and pulled him back down to my lips. Cam stopped me. What the hell Cam?
"You better take it slow baby, before I rape you." He smiled deviously.
I continued my effort, "You can't rape the willing Cam."
"You can if they're virgins. I'm very tempted right now baby and I'm afraid I could hurt you."
"Hurt me?" I tilted my head, Cam nodded. "Hurt me how?"
Cam took a deep breath, "Well, I could... let's not talk about this at the moment. You packed?" What the hell kind of answer was that? I wanted to talk about it right now. Instead, I just nodded and jutted towards my bags. Cam smiled, "Good. Let's go to my house, take a shower... together" he winked. "Then we go to dinner and we'll discuss things."
"Yes, I would like to talk about `things' too." I pouted. I figured at this point, I could really milk the younger innocent boy thing with the latent kink and get away with it completely around Cam. I was right.
Cam stood up with his hard-on still tenting his shorts. He grabbed my hands and lifted me off the couch and patted my hard-on. He smiled and grabbed my bags and carried them to his car. As soon as I got in the passenger seat, Cam planted a kiss on me and turned the car on.
"I miss you so much."
I was happy.
To be continued...
I welcome all comments and criticisms about my story. In fact, they're one of the reasons I enjoyed writing. Send your thoughts, questions, and/or intrigues to supercoolguy999@yahoo.com.