The nature of a truly desperate heart - Chapter 2
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The nature of a truly desperate heart - Chapter 2
Thomas
I didn't want to leave without saying goodbye, I felt bad enough for myself, I didn't want this guy to think I didn't appreciate his time. So I sat on the couch waiting for him to finish his shower, but I fell asleep. When I woke up, it took me several minutes to recognize where I was, I looked around and saw Matt sitting in the chair, with nothing but basketball shorts on and a coffee in hand. I didn't want to gawk, but he was hot, and obviously knew it, and he was watching me sleep.
Again, I knew I should feel observed and threatened, but I didn't, I felt protected, I didn't know what to think anymore. I looked at the clock in his wall and it was only 1pm, so, as a way of thanking him, I invited him to lunch.
"I just need to go home, take a shower and put some clean clothes on, I can cook and we'll eat there, or we can order in" I said, hoping he would say yes, and he did, which made me happy, I don't know why.
Since I didn't have my car with me, Matt drove us to my place, once inside I showed him the kitchen and living room and went to take a shower and get dressed, when I came back he was looking at the pictures above the fireplace with a thoughtful look.
"I'm gonna cook now, want to help?" I asked hoping he would say yes, not because I needed help, but because I was feeling embarrassed he was paying so much attention to the pictures, specifically the one I had with Allan.
We went to the kitchen and I started pulling things together for a late lunch, I was feeling more and more comfortable with Matt, but then my phone started ringing, I didn't want to pick up, I knew it was Allan, but it could also be my parents, I had my cellphone off, so it could be anyone and the damn thing doesn't have caller ID. With a sight I picked it up.
"Hello"
"Tom, it's me, where have you been, I was looking for you last night, and your cellphone is off" Allan said in the other end of the line.
"Don't call me that, you know I don't like it. And why do you care where I've been, I'm sure you could have found something better to worry about"
"Don't be like that, we can still be together, but you know, with other people too, broadening our horizons"
"You can go broad your horizons to hell, either we're together as one on one, or we're not together. Seems to me that we're not together"
"Fine, have it your way, we're done"
"That's not my way, but sure, we're done."
I was mad, I was in the verge of crying with anger, I didn't like this feelings, when I was this mad I did stupid stuff, so I just picked the knife and started chopping onions like crazy, I had to concentrate my anger in something. I forgot I wasn't alone until I felt arms around me, in that moment I let go and cried, I must have collapsed, because I don't remember anything else until I woke up in my bed in a comfortable embrace of warm arms.
"Hey there, sleeping beauty. You ok now?" Matt said as I once again blushed, not only because he called me beauty, but because he was taking care of me.
"Yea, I guess I'll be fine, I'm sorry I didn't get to finish lunch, I'm sure you must be hungry. Really, I'm sorry"
"Would you stop saying you're sorry, there is nothing to be sorry about, I'm actually having a great time, it's been a long time since I had some gorgeous man in my arms"
I don't know if I blushed again or if I ever stopped blushing, this guy is making blush like a teen virgin girl. I looked at the clock it was 8pm.
"Should we go out and grab dinner? I really don't want to stay home right now, I know he'll show up."
"Pack a bag, you're coming with me. Don't forget your toothbrush and shaving kit."
"Where are we going?"
"To my place, obviously. I own the building and as I told you, the apartment upstairs is vacant, you can stay there for as long as you want. Follow me in your car, there is a parking spot in the back of the building for you."
With a smile I grabbed a few changes of clothes and my necessities and we set off. While i was following him I finally looked at the streets, this was the old part of the city, I've only lived here for 2 years and working and living uptown I've never spent much time in this part of town, I might have been here once or twice having dinner with Allan but that was it.
The apartment was amazing, it had private entrance, two bedrooms, completely furnished, two full baths, a fully equipped kitchen, and furnished living and dining room. With the private parking spot, and the view of the city's skyline, it was beautiful.
"Why don't you rent this place? It could bring you a great income."
"I rented it out once, but it didn't work out. So I began using it as a guest place for friends and family visiting."
"My lease is ending, would you be amenable to rent this place to me? I really don't want to stay uptown anymore."
I hoped he said yes, I needed the change, the fact that Allan had the keys to the apartment didn't help.
"I could do that, since my dad died family hasn't been down here, and the few friends I have are locals."
"Great, how about I ask a lawyer friend of mine to draw a contract, how much do you want for the rent?"
"How about no contract and no rent, you pay your own utilities and the maid? I have a lady that comes twice a week, she usually cleans the bar and both apartments, so you would only be paying one third of her paycheck."
"Sounds great to me, I'll take a few days off from work to move from my current place, I rented it furnished so I only have personal things. Thanks, you're like an angel that fell on my life."
I looked at him, he was blushing, Matt was hot, but when he blushed he was actually cute, i couldn't help but smile at that, I was actually feeling good about this. It was like I could actually breed for the first time in the last 24 hours.
We ordered dinner and ate in his living room while something played in the TV, but we were too lost in talking to pay attention, we were telling each other about our families, I could see he loved his father, but his eyes saddened when he was talking about the rest of his family.
Matt
Once again I was feeling like time didn't exist, this Thomas guy was easy to talk too, we didn't need to force conversation, the TV was on, but I don't know what was playing.
"My parents are great, they knew I was gay before I even told them, they accepted it and actually tried to set me up with several guys they thought were great for me, I think they only wanted me to date a local so I wouldn't move away." Thomas started laughing with that, his smile was intoxicating.
"I never met my mom or anyone in her side of the family, my dad was great, he always defended me and always supported me in any choice I made. When I came out I was crying because I didn't want to disappoint him, he just hugged me and said that I would never disappoint him, the rest of the family though, that was tough. My uncles and aunts don't accept me, and my grandfather actually blames me for my dad's death. He died almost two years ago from a heart attack."
I was trying to control my tears, I hated talking about my family, they stopped talking to me when dad died, it was like I had died with him. I had a cousin who was like my sister, even her stopped talking to me. When they saw that they weren't included in my dad's testament, they even tried to get it annulled, this building was classified as cultural patrimony, so it was worth a lot of money.
I felt his hand on my leg, and it felt great, I knew it wasn't anything more than to show that he was there to support me, and I appreciated it, I put my hand on his and a spark of electricity ran through my body.
After having dinner and doing the clean up we continued talking, he was telling me stories about him as a child and I did the same, when we looked at the clock it was already after midnight, and we were tired. Thomas went upstairs and I went to bed.
I couldn't believe I had met this guy 24 hours ago and I was falling in love with him, for the first time in my life I felt insecure, I needed this guy to love me back, but he was in love with this Allan guy that broke his heart.
I went to bed thinking about the man I had upstairs, and for the first time since I was single I had a good night of sleep. I woke up with a knock on my door, it could only be Thomas, so I got up and went to the door, forgetting I was only in my boxers. I opened the door and he was there open mouthed looking me up and down, his hair was still wet and he was wearing jeans and a sleeveless shirt. I could tell he took care of his body.
"Good morning, where is the closest grocery store? I need some stuff for breakfast." he spoke waking me from my gawking.
"Good morning. Sorry, I forgot I don't keep groceries upstairs. Come in, you can eat breakfast with me and then we'll go grocery shopping, I need a few things for the bar too. How about you cook us something while I get ready for the day." I said while leading him to the kitchen, and turning around so I could go take a shower and get dressed.
Finally ready for the day I went back to the kitchen, he had made pancakes and coffee and it all smelled great, I loved pancakes, but couldn't make one to save my life.
"I hope you like pancakes, I didn't know what you wanted and when looking through the cabinets I felt like making some. Do you have syrup?" he said, with such a innocent smile that I felt the desire to kiss him.
"Yes, I have syrup in the fridge, there is also fresh fruit, butter and jam if you prefer. I like mine with banana and syrup."
"Me too."
My heart skipped another beat knowing that he like the pancakes the same way I did. Steve, my ex, always said that banana and syrup shouldn't mix. I was falling even more for this guy, but I needed to keep my feelings in check, he just broke up with his boyfriend and I didn't want to be a rebound fuck.
We ate in silence, just enjoying the good food Thomas cooked. With the kitchen cleaned we went grocery shopping, I took the bar's van and he came with me.
"No sense in taking two cars for one trip." he said, again smiling that innocent smile that was amazingly beautiful.
I bought all I needed for the bar, like pretzels and other snacks, a few bottles of some drinks that were in the end, several bottles of water and some sodas. Thomas bought what he needed to feed himself for a week. We went back and put his things in the apartment and then he helped me putting my stuff in the bar. With that done he looked at me sheepish.
"Can you help me move my stuff from the other place? With this van it would be much quicker. It's fine if you don't want to. I'm sorry, I shouldn't be asking, that was stupid of me. I'll call a moving company. Really, sorry, I don't know why I said that, you probably have work to do, and..." I stopped him by putting my hand on his mouth.
"You talk too much." I laughed. "Yes, I'll help you, yes, with the van it will be much quicker, no, you're not stupid, and no, I have nothing urgent to do in the bar." I laughed again because he was blushing.
"Ok, thanks."
We went to his apartment and gathered his clothes, his personal stuff was all packed in no time, we took all the pictures. The one with the guy I assumed was Allan was the last one, he took it out of the frame and put it in the trash can and saved the frame. The stuff he had in the fridge was bagged to take with us. We took one last trip through the house, seeing that nothing was forgotten we went back downtown and started taking the stuff to his new apartment. I later found that he had already called his landlord and said he wasn't going to renew the lease.
When everything was upstairs we started making lunch, his cellphone ranged and without looking he picked it up. The frown in his face told me it was Allan calling. In silence I asked him if he wanted me to leave, he just shook his head no and grabbed my hand, asking me to stay.