The Journal

The Journal Chapter Two By randyhoward2@yahoo.com

The usual disclaimers apply. The following is the property of the author and may not be reproduced without his permission. One copy may be made for your own personal use.

From the previous chapter:

I awake with a jolt and sit up. We aren't moving anymore and Kyle is nowhere around that I can see and I panic. I get up and go outside to look for him and see him lying on the ground just off the road. He is covered in blood and isn't moving.

"Oh God, what is happening now?" I ask to myself.

I then hear a voice behind me saying, "There's the other fag, get him."

I feel a hard whack on my head and then darkness.

Chapter 2

When I came to I was in an ambulance and I looked over and saw Kyle lying on a stretcher so still. His face had dried blood on it and his beautiful eyes were closed.

"Is he alive," I ask.

"Barely," replies the attendant.

"What has happened to us," I inquire.

"Apparently you were badly beaten," he says

"Do you recall anything that happened," he asks me.

"No I don't," I reply.

"I remember waking up and realizing we had stopped and I couldn't find Kyle," I tell him.

"His head has sustain much trauma to it and until there are x-rays we can't be sure how bad," he tells me.

"How about me," I ask him.

"You had a severe blow to the back of your head but I think that other than a slight concussion you should be fine and you will probably also have an x-ray," he tells me.

"If the police officer hadn't come across you when he did Kyle may have died and you could have been worst," he adds.

My heart is breaking as I think about Kyle and his condition. I pray to God to spare him and give him back to me. The tears are flowing down my face and the attendant tries to comfort me.

"Is he your brother," he asks me.

"No my boyfriend," I tell him.

He looks at me for a moment, says to me that he has a boyfriend also, and can imagine what I must be going through. He takes my hand, squeezes it, and tells me things will be fine.

"The hospital is just a few more minutes away and they have this new unit they call a 'trauma unit'," he tells me.

The ambulance pulls up to the emergency ward doors and our doors swing open. Attendants rush out, grab Kyle's stretcher from the paramedic, and rush him inside. Then another group comes for my stretcher and whisks me inside. I'm beside myself wondering where Kyle is. A doctor is examining him, and turns to a nurse and orders an x-ray of the skull, neck and full back to be safe, I hear him say. Another doctor treats my cuts and has to put six stitches in my head. He tells me,

"Until we get the x-ray results, which I think will be fine, you look worst than you actually are, we don't know if anything got seriously hurt inside your head," he tells me.

"What about Kyle?" I ask Dr Johnson looking at his name badge.

"That I can't say, Dr Martin is working on him and from the looks of him he is much worst than you are," he tells me.

'My God, who and what did they do to us and why' I think. It is then that a state police officer comes in to talk to me.

"Mr. Joshua Kerry?" he asks.

"Yes sir, that's me," I say.

"I am officer Mark Stapleton with the Ohio state police. I would like to ask you a few questions if you are up to it," he says.

"I have a wicked headache but I am sure I can answer what I know," I say and grimace as I try to rise.

"Don't try to sit," he tells me.

"Do you remember anything about what happened this evening?" he asks.

"No. I was asleep in the back of the van when I noticed that we had stopped moving. I sat up and looked for Kyle." he is interrupted by Officer Stapleton.

"That would be Mr. Kyle Fitzpatrick," he says looking at his notes.

"Yes officer," I say.

"I get out and look for Kyle but I can't see him. I walk around a bit and see him lying in the grass just off the road. I ran over to him and bent down to see if he was all right and noticed all the blood. It was then that I felt a blow to my head and went out," I tell the officer.

"You didn't notice anyone following you at all?" he asks.

"Like I said, I was in the back sleeping," I tell him.

It is then that Josh remembers about the altercation, they had in town earlier. Therefore, he tells the officer about what happened and mentions how the waitress at the diner there in town had seen what happened and she might know their names. He says that maybe they followed them and may have jumped them.

"Well that's a good lead and thank you Mr. Kerry. I will get back to you if we find anything out. I hope that your boyfriend and you recover well," he says to me.

"How do you know he's my boyfriend," I ask the officer.

"Well. well I just assumed with the way you were acting," he says, as his face turns red.

"Oh, and yes he is. my boyfriend," I add.

The officer gives me his card and tells me to call if I have any more information and then he leaves and my attention once again is on Kyle. I stop a nurse and inquire as to where Kyle is and she informs me that he is in the x- ray department as an orderly comes to wheel me down there also. I see Kyle lying still on his gurney and his beautiful eyes are still closed. I ask the orderly to put me beside Kyle so I can reach him. He moves me over to him and I reach out and find his hand, it is so cold and I start to cry. I just squeeze it and pray that God will give him back to me. I am lying there crying when I hear,

"Hey bud, why you crying?" Kyle asks me.

Startled, I turn to Kyle and he is looking at me, with one eye open and one closed. I squeeze his hand and say,

"Oh God thank you for giving him back to me." I look Kyle in the eyes, or his one he has opened, and ask him,

"How you feeling babe?"

"Like I got hit by a train," he says.

"What happened," I ask.

"Well I had to piss so I pull over and stop. I get out and walk over to the bushes and piss. You were sound asleep in the back so I didn't wake you," he says.

"I wish you had though," I tell him.

"I am pissing and I see a car pull behind me and stop. I then noticed that it was those guys from town and they had followed us. I put my dick away but by then, they are on me and one has his arms around me while the other asks,

"Where is your fag boyfriend sweetie?" he asks.

"I left him in town," I tell them.

"Well no matter, you are the one we want. Not so tough now are ya," he says.

"It is then that he swings and he gets me in the gut. I bend over and his knee comes up and gets me in the face. I fall to the ground and him and the others start kicking me and calling me names.

"Hey faggot want to suck our cocks, huh," one says.

"Hey someone is moving in the van, one calls out. It was then that I blacked out." He tells me.

I tell him about everything that happened after that and smiled at him. It is then that lab tech came out and took Kyle in for his x-rays. He calls out to me and yells,

"I love you Joshua Kerry."

"I love you to babe," I call out to him and he is gone.

We spent a few days in the hospital for observation and were released. I called Officer Stapleton and gave him the information that Kyle had given me. He said that he would need to hear it from him himself and we arranged to meet at headquarters to give our formal statements. We did and Kyle called his folks and told him what happened and that we would be home in less than three hours. They were upset that he hadn't called sooner but he told them he was fine and didn't want them to worry. Well when we got there and mother saw him, she cried. She completely lost it hugging him and crying. When she finally calmed down, she led us into the drawing room and sat us down. She called Franklin, the butler, and asked for some drinks. He asked Kyle and me what we wanted and left. Kyle then introduced me to his mom.

"Mom this is Joshua Kerry," he says.

"Pleased to meet you Joshua," she says and gets up and gives me a hug.

"Have you called your parents yet young man?" she asks me.

"No mam, my folks are on vacation and I can't reach them, " I tell her.

"Where is dad mom," Kyle asks his mom.

"He is in France on business and will be home on Friday," she says.

It is then that Franklin returns with our drinks and tell Mrs. Fitzpatrick that she has a call. She excuses herself and goes to take the call. Kyle comes over, sits by me, and gives me a kiss.

"Kyle your mom might come back in and see us," I say.

"So what," he says "I am going to tell here about us anyways."

"Tell me what," his mom asks.

"Well mom why don't you sit down please. I need to tell you something and hope you understand."

He is sweating and starting to stutter as he tries to find the words to gently tell his mom. Like that could ever happen.

"Mom I have noticed something about myself now for many years. I have only just now come to terms with it. Mom, I'm gay," and he lowers his head and looks at the floor.

"Oh my and I thought it was going to be something so terrible," she says.

"We have known that since you were fourteen," she tells him.

"What!" he says.

"How," he asks.

"We just put two and two together and realized you were gay," she said.

"What two and two did you put together," he asks her.

"Well let me think. One you never had a girlfriend that seemed to matter. Two when you had your best friend Brian over, the way you would look at him and hang on his every word, well I am not blind son," she concludes.

"And how do you and dad feel about me now," he asks with apprehension in his voice.

She gets up, walks over to him, pulls him up to her, and gives him the biggest mom hug you ever saw and a kiss on his cheek.

"Son we love you and only want what will make you happy," she says to him with love in her eyes. "We don't care if you are gay or not as long as you are happy. We don't understand it but we love you and that is all that matters. Now is this young man your boyfriend dear?" she asks Kyle.

"Yes mom he is and isn't he so handsome," he asks her and takes me by the hands and pulls me up to him and gives me a hug and a kiss on the lips. I turn every shade of red there is. She comes over, and hugs me and says, "welcome to the family son." She takes me by the arm and leads me to my room. She stops at the door and looks from Kyle to me and back to Kyle and asks,

"Do you sleep together or should there be separate bedrooms?" she asks Kyle.

"We sleep together mom but if you are uncomfortable with that separate rooms are fine," he tells her.

"I have no problem with that as long as sex does not happen please," she asks.

"That's fine mom we can respect that and mom, I love you and thanks," he says as he gives her a hug and kiss.

"Well that phone call was from my club and I need to make an appearance there. I will be home for dinner at six, see you then." She says and leaves.

We go out, and get our clothes and bring them into our bedroom. Kyle closes the door behind me, and locks it, and turns to me and takes me in his arms. He draws me to him and kisses me hard and deep. His passion is boiling over in him and he breaks our kiss and says,

"I need to make love to you my love."

"But Kyle your mom said no sex."

"I know but she is gone and I need you babe," he whines.

"Well I need you too babe, so I guess its fine."

He slowly starts to unbutton my shirt as I am undoing his. We let them fall to the floor and he undoes my belt and unbuttons my jeans. They fall to the floor and I step out of them. I am standing there naked and he drops to his knees. He takes my cock into his mouth and swallows it to my pubes. I let out a deep sigh and moan and put my hands on his head. He sucks me until I am hard, pulls off, and removes his jeans. We move to the bed and he gently lays me down. He gets on top of me and we start to kiss. It is soft at first but it gets more passionate and hard as we grind our hard cocks into each other. He slides down me and makes love to my nipples. He nibbles and softly bites them and then caresses them with his tongue. He drops down to my cock, moves it aside, and takes my balls into his mouth. He rolls them around and sucks them driving me to the brink. I am moaning and thrashing on our bed in ecstasy. He drops them, and lifts my legs and put them on his shoulders. He starts licking behind my balls and moves to my rosebud. He licks all around it, gently bites it, and then inserts his tongue in my hole. The feelings are too great to give words to. I yell out in my pleasure,

"Oh Kyle what you are doing to me babe. That is so fucking hot. I need you to fuck me babe right now," I say to him.

"You sure," he asks me "Have you ever done that before bud."

"You know I haven't. You are my first man ever."

He reaches over to his nightstand and grabs some baby oil. He pours some on his fingers and some on my ass. He places a finger to my hole and gently pushes it in. The feeling is a little uncomfortable but not bad. He starts to work my sphincter muscle with his finger. He does this awhile and puts another finger in. With a scissor motion, he opens and stretches me. The feelings are fantastic as he works my hole and finds my prostate gland. He rubs it and my hips fly off the bed.

"Babe you better fuck me now because whatever you are hitting is driving me to the edge," I tell him between moans.

He lifts up, and moves closer to my ass and aligns his cock with my hole.

"Are you sure bud? Tell me if it hurts you and I will stop and pull out," he says.

"Yeah babe go for it," I tell him.

He gently pushes against my hole and I push back. There is a moment of pressure and then the head slides in. The pain is so bad I scream out. He pulls out immediately and asks if I am all right. For a moment I can't talk but slowly reply,

"Wow that caught me off guard."

"We don't have to do this," he says.

"No babe I want to it just took me by surprise. Please Kyle try again," I tell him.

He applies more oil and gently pushes the head in and waits. No pain so I tell him to continue. He gently and slowly slides more of his cock into me stopping every so often to let me adjust to him. When he is all the way in he waits a moment and asks,

"You all right bud?"

"Oh fucking yeah. Fuck me babe," I tell him.

He starts out slowly, with long deep strokes. In and out slowly gradually picking up rhythm as he goes. After a while, he is fucking me hard, deep and fast. He hits my prostate each time he thrusts in me. My hips rise to meet his downward thrusts. I can feel my nuts tightening up and I know I am close.

"Oh fuck babe, I'm close, fuck me hard." I say to him.

He is fucking me so hard and deep and then it happens my nuts draw up and my cock swells and I shoot a volley of cum right up to my face. I shoot volley after volley of cum. I have never had an orgasm like this. Never have I cum like this. As I came, my sphincter muscle contracted around his cock and brought him to his climax.

"Fuck Josh I'm cuming," he yells.

"Oh fuck man you are so tight and hot man. I can't stop cuming." He says.

He is slamming my ass as if it was his last fuck. I can feel his cum filling my bowels. He fucks me until he has no more to give me. He drops on me and kisses me deeply and passionately. My arms are around him and holding him as if never to let him go. We kiss while we calm down from our sexual high.

"I love you Kyle Fitzpatrick." I tell him.

"I love you also Joshua Kerry." He replies.

We kiss and then head to the shower. He turns on the shower, and adjusts the temperature and we get in. He places me under the warm water and then himself. He washes my hair and washes me all over. I then do the same for him. He takes me in his arms after we rinse and says to me.

"You make me so happy bud. I have never felt this way about anyone. Today we lost our virginity and I felt it so good." He says to me with love in his eyes.

"Well, I lost my virginity but you still have yours," I tell him.

"Well next time you can fuck me and then we will both be the same."

"I don't need to do that, I enjoyed the feel of you in me. It truly made us one. Just having you to love me is more than I could ever hope for my love." Then we kissed.

Two weeks later, we left for Massachusetts and to tell my folks. I got to meet his father and he was very genuine in his feelings towards his son and his being gay. He welcomed me to the family and later introduced me as his new son in law to his friends. It was very awkward at times having always hidden my being gay. I didn't know at first how to handle being out and so adamant about it. We both seemed to survive our time with his parents and looked forward to going home to meet mine. His van was packed and we both hugged and kissed his mom and dad goodbye. We had talked the day before with Officer Stapleton and he told us how they had arrested the four men who had jumped and beaten us and got one of them to confess. After awhile they all confessed and now we don't have to go back for a trial. We were finally on the road and heading home. I found his guitar in the back and started to play. We sang most of our favorites like Dylan and Peter, Paul and Mary. It made the trip home so much more pleasant. Just being with Kyle was all I needed. He was so handsome and strong. He had apologized soon after we got home to his house that he hadn't been able to protect me from those thugs. I told him that it wasn't his fault seeing how he unconscious. We spent the night making love in Pennsylvania at a little motel. The next morning we were up early and on the road after a breakfast at a local diner. We arrived at my home about one in the afternoon. I knew mom would be home but dad wouldn't be until six. I told Kyle that maybe we should wait until dad got home to tell them both. He looks at me and says,

"You scared bud?"

"Nervous is more like it. My folks aren't like yours."

"You know that we don't have to tell them right now if you would rather wait." He says to me.

"No love, the sooner I am honest with them the better. I just hope things go well." I prayed.

Mom was home when we arrived and she greeted me with a hug and a kiss. She stands back, and looks at me and asks me what happened to my face. I tell her we were in a fight and I was all right. She says, "men I will never understand them." I introduce Kyle and tell her how we are both going to Umass in September. She asks him what major he was going to pursue.

"At the moment Liberal Arts until I can determine what career I desire."

"Joshua is majoring in business law like his dad," she says. "Isn't that right Joshua?"

"Mom," I said, "I don't know what I want to major in yet."

"Oh honey you wait and see your dad will point you in the right direction." She tells me as I roll my eyes.

"Honey take Kyle up to the guest room and let him relax. You both must be tired after such a long trip."

"Well I thought he would stay with me in my room mom."

"Why would he want to do that for? You only have one bed and you are both grown men."

"But mom.please"

"No but about it son, now put him in the guest room."

She turns and goes into the kitchen to prepare dinner. I take Kyle upstairs to the guest room and he pulls me to him and kisses me. I put my arms around him and kiss him back.

"I don't think she will understand Josh," he tells me.

"I am still going to tell them."

"What if they don't take it well?" He asks me.

"Well, I will cross that bridge when I have to babe."

We put his things in the guest room and go for a ride to see the university grounds. Amherst is a beautiful little college town with its quaint Victorian homes and several other college campuses. We get to the Umass campus and find that there are many people there already. I ask this guy which way to the administrative offices and he says that he is heading there himself and we join him.

"By the way my name is JP," he says to me.

"I'm Josh and this is Kyle." I say.

I ask him if he lives on campus and he says no way. He has an apartment in town and that there is still one left in his building. It seems that the couple that was going to rent it backed out and he was heading over to the administrative offices to place an ad for rental apartment. I look at Kyle and he says,

"Before you do that can we see it first?"

"Sure if you want to. It has two bedrooms; living room and a big eat in kitchen with a huge bathroom. It even comes with heat and a garage. Oh and it's furnished. Not the best stuff but suitable though."

"How much is the rent on it?" I ask him.

"Well the last folks were paying fifty five dollars a month but the landlord remodeled the place and want seventy dollars a month."

We follow him to the apartment, which is in a gorgeous Victorian home that had been made into three separate apartments, and the one we are looking at is on the first floor. We get the grand tour and decide to take it. Kyle gives the landlord two months rent and he gives us the keys. I look at him and say,

"Our first home together love."

"Yep!" He says and I hit him on his chest lightly.

"I will pay half when I get to the bank. I don't have it on me but I do have it in the bank." I say, "Can we afford this place?" He looks at me and says,

"I can afford much more than this."

"I will get a job and pay half of our living expenses babe." I tell him.

"Listen," he says taking me in his arms "I am the man of this house and I will provide."

"But that's not right," I tell him. "I don't expect you to pay my way in this."

"Bud, I love you and want to take care of you. Money doesn't matter to me. I want you to be able to study and get good grades and not have to worry about money or work."

"Well, we will see about this," I tell him as he takes me in his arms and kisses me.

We spent the next few hours christening our new love nest. We made passionate love for the next two hours until it was time to head home for dinner. Dad was home when we got there and shook my hand and asked when I planned to get a haircut. I told him I wasn't and introduced him to Kyle. He shook hands with Kyle and asked if he planned to get his hair cut before school started. He said he hadn't planned on it. My dad still wore his as he did in the Marines. He looked at me, and said that we needed to talk before I went to bed. Mom came in and said that dinner was ready and to go and wash up. We came in a few minutes later and sat down for a nice home cooked dinner. It went well at dinner mostly small talk about Kyle's parents. After dinner, he asks Kyle if he would excuse us for a dad and son talk. Kyle said that he would help Mrs. Kerry clean up from dinner. My dad said she is Mrs. Quincy she had married me after Joshua's dad died.

"So son, have a seat." He says after leading me into the den.

"What do you want to talk about dad?"

"Well first your attitude tonight."

"My attitude is just fine. I have said nothing out of line tonight."

"You disrespected me in front of your hippy friend about your hair. I also understand that you gave your mother a hard time about sleeping arrangements today. Also we need to come to an understanding about your major also." He tells me in his matter of fact voice.

"First of all dad, my hair is my hair and I will wear it as I like. Secondly, my major is not up for discussion here. I will decide what I want to do with my life not you or mom. Finally dad, Kyle is not my hippy friend he is my boyfriend and lover."

My dad's face was like a thermometer. You could see the different degrees of redness as it climbed up his face. He grabs me by the shirt and pulls me to his face and yells,

"No son of mine is going to be a faggot."

"Well sorry dad but that is not what I am, I am gay." I tell him.

He shoves me into the table and I fall over it crashing to the floor. He reaches down, raises his hand, and hits me across the face making my nose bleed and sending me again crashing to the floor. He reaches again to strike me and Kyle grabs his arm.

"Nobody hits my man," he says to my dad.

"How dare you touch me you faggot." He says to Kyle.

"You ever call me or your son that again it will be the last thing you ever say. Do I make myself clear sir?"

"Get the fuck out of my house and don't either of you come back," he yells causing my mom to come running in.

"What is going on in here?" she asks looking at me on the floor bleeding.

"Your fa.. gay son is leaving and not coming back," he tells her. "Now go back in the kitchen and do your chores."

Kyle helps me up and we leave the room. We go upstairs and get our clothes. We come down and he is ready to attack us again. Kyle stands in between us and tells him,

"I wouldn't even think of it, you would be sorry."

He swings at Kyle and misses as Kyle steps aside. Kyle shoves him into the couch and we leave. We get into Kyle's van and drive off. We head to our new apartment and settle in for the night. He takes me in his arms, and pulls me to him and kisses me. I just love this man so much. After a while we break and he looks at me and asks,

"How are you planning on paying for school?" he asks me.

"I'm not. I have a full academic scholarship that is paying my way. Now all I need is money for books and supplies and that I will get a part time job for." I tell him.

"Josh babe, you are my man. Let me take care of you, please." He says.

"I can't do that love, it wouldn't be fare or right. I didn't fall in love with you so you could support me." I tell him.

"If I remember right you didn't even know I came from money now did you."

"But." I start to say.

"No buts but your but bud. I'm horny lets make love huh," and we go to bed.

"It's your turn to loose your virginity," I tell him.

"We will see," he says with a smile. God I love that smile.

To be continued.

************************************************ This is the end of Chapter Two. Let me know if you liked it or not. Email me at randyhoward2@yahoo.com