To summarise the disclaimer, don't copy, don't read if you shouldn't and don't be under the misapprehension that it's real, cause it isn't. Short and sweet, huh?
Thanks to my friends John and Lars for chucking in the odd comma and such.
Chapter 4
Nora Powers dropped her grandson off at 'The Big House' just after 4 pm on Thursday. Ben had been looking forward to the visit for the past couple of days.
"Hello, young man." Sarah greeted Ben at the front door.
"Erm, hello." Ben replied.
"You've come to have a swim in our pool then?" Sarah said opening the door wider to admit him.
"Yes, please."
"Hi son." Carl was busy sanding down one of the many banister rails on the large staircase in the hallway.
"Hello dad, you okay?"
"Yeah, son, not bad at all. Did you have a good time at school?"
"Oh, not bad, we're not doing that much because of the summer holidays, they start at the end of next week."
"Shit!" Carl said softly. He'd forgotten that his son would be on holiday for the six-week summer break. He'd have to make arrangements for someone to look after Ben whilst he worked.
"Hello again, Ben." Robbie came out of the Library; he'd been busy sorting out the books in there. Frank, who had never bothered much with the library, had allowed them to become disarranged.
"Hello, Mr Foster." Ben said.
"Oh, please call me Rob."
"Sorry."
"Have you brought your swimming trunks with you?"
"Oh yeah."
Robbie then led the young boy down the hall and into the large poolroom.
"Oh cool!" Ben said once he'd entered the impressive room.
"Thought you'd like it in here. You can get changed in one of the two rooms over there." Robbie pointed to the doors to their left.
Carl had asked Robbie if he'd mind staying in the pool with Ben, he didn't want him to swim alone. Robbie had agreed immediately.
Once they'd both changed and taken a quick shower, they got into the pool.
"Ben, is there something wrong with your back?" Robbie asked after seeing his guest walk rather stiffly. He seemed to stoop and he was also walking on the balls of his feet.
"Yeah I've got Rheumatoid arthritis. The doctor said it would be good for me to exercise in a swimming pool. Dad's taken me to the one in town, but they're shutting it soon. I'm going to go to the one in the hospital, but there's a waiting list to get in though." Ben went on to tell Robbie about the equipment they had there and how it could help him.
Robbie, who had picked up a little medical knowledge from Patrick, his late partner, began to mull over how he could help the young lad.
"Okay then, do you use the breast stroke or the crawl?"
"Oh, the breast stroke." Ben admitted. "Though I'm not very fast. Dad's a much better swimmer than me."
"Oh I know, he's a great swimmer. I can remember from our schooldays." Robbie said, his mind drifting back to a teenage vision of male perfection, coursing his way up and down the swimming lanes in the town pool during swimming lessons they'd attended together. Not to mention the many times that Carl and Robbie had mucked about in this very pool. Robbie had a wistful smile on his face at the memory.
"Rob, can I ask you a really personal question?" Ben said coming close to him; they were both standing in the shallow end.
"Erm, yeah, I guess so." Robbie said clearing his head of the visions of Carl in a sleek black Speedo.
"Why did you and dad fall out?"
"Oh well, our lives kind of took different paths."
"I don't understand." Ben persisted.
Robbie began to feel uncomfortable. "Erm, well, erm...."
"Rob, I know I'm only twelve, and most people think I'm just a kid, but I'm quite observant. Or so my teachers tell me. Rob did you stop seeing dad because of mum?"
"Erm, well," Robbie was really feeling uncomfortable now. He'd only ever disclosed the real reasons for the break up with one other person, Sarah. Though for some reason as Robbie looked deep into the brown-eyed pre-teen standing next to him, the water from his recent shower still causing his short brown hair to stick closely to his scalp, Robbie saw understanding, a kindred spirit, someone who Robbie just knew wouldn't judge him harshly. "Yes, Ben. That was the reason." Robbie said quietly. He then dropped his eyes to the water.
Ben, showing far more maturity than his years, raised a wet hand and lifted up Robbie's chin, and said "Rob, were you in love with my dad?"
Robbie couldn't speak for a moment; he swallowed, opened his mouth, closed it again, swallowed a second time and then in a hoarse whisper "I still am." He began to cry softly.
"It's okay, Rob, I understand." Ben said wrapping his arms around Robbie to comfort him.
"I think we ought to start swimming some laps, then we'll think of some exercises for you to do, young man." Robbie said in an effort to try and move the conversation away from what was a most uncomfortable subject.
"Yeah, okay then." Ben knew that he shouldn't push Robbie any further. Robbie's declaration hadn't come as much of a surprise really. Ben had seen how Robbie had looked longingly at his dad the last time he'd been present. Rob being in love with his dad would most certainly explain why he had to break off contact with him when his mother came onto the scene.
"What you told me, Rob, I promise I won't mention to dad." He said wanting to put the older man's mind at rest.
"Thanks, Ben. I know your dad wouldn't be able to accept what I am, and we're just starting to become friends again. It isn't easy for me, but I need your dad's friendship so much, even though it's painful at times."
Ben gave Robbie another hug in understanding. "Right then, I'll do a couple of laps, then if you'll hold me, I'll do a few stretches."
"Okay."
Robbie watched as Ben executed his laps. He certainly wasn't as fast as Carl, but he made a decent job of it none the less. Robbie marvelled at how grown up Ben was. He knew that when he'd been Ben's age, he didn't have the same level of maturity. Carl was a very lucky man to have a son like Ben.
"How's he doing?" Carl's words caused Robbie to look up.
"Great. I'm going to help him with a few exercises in a minute or two. Have you finished for the day?"
"Yeah, the boss is a real slave driver, but I think I'll sneak off the job early and go and have a swim in his private pool." Carl joked. Robbie saw those well remembered dimples come out in Carl's cheeks. Seeing Carl's happy face made Robbie go all warm and tingly inside. All he was able to do was smile back. Robbie hoped with everything that he had, that he and Carl were getting their friendship back.
Carl walked into one of the changing rooms and donned his swimming trunks. When he emerged, Robbie was sad to see that Carl had put on a rather baggy pair of swim shorts. Robbie had been looking forward to seeing Carl's ample breadbasket. Though, on reflection, perhaps it was best that he not be tempted. Carl had a mischievous grin on his face as he walked towards the deep end. He then dove into the pool from the side; Robbie didn't have a diving board. Robbie marvelled at how gracefully Carl had executed the dive, hardly causing a ripple. Swimming under the water towards his son who hadn't noticed where his dad was, Carl surfaced and wrapped his arms around him.
"Having fun?" Carl said shaking the water from his eyes.
"Yeah dad, it's great in here. Thanks for letting me come. Rob said he'd help me with some stretching exercises."
"That's good." Carl said smiling at the most precious thing in his world. He was glad that Robbie was getting on well with Ben.
"Look, Carl, Ben said something about floats and things that they use in the hospital pool. I've been thinking about getting some inflatable toys and what not, so do you think it would be okay if I got some that would specifically be of benefit to Ben, too?"
Robbie had mentioned the bit about toys in general; he didn't want Carl to feel to uncomfortable about him showing off his money. Not that a few floats would be that expensive anyway, but at that stage in their friendship, he didn't want to take any chances.
"Thanks, mate. It's really good of you to care so much." Carl said. He was rather touched at Robbie's gesture. "Though I've no idea what type of things he'll need."
"Oh, leave it to me to find out."
"Rob, are you and dad going to have a race?" Ben called out from the other side of the pool.
"God no, your dad's a much better swimmer than me. I don't think I ever beat him in any of the sports we played, did I?" Robbie said turning to Carl.
"Nah, you were always such a wimp."
Robbie took his revenge by splashing Carl. Carl of course retaliated, and a good-natured water fight began.
"Hey you two, who's going to play the hill for me?" Ben asked wanting to join in the fun. The two men took it in turns to act as the hill to Ben's king. They all had a great time. Robbie even got onto Carl's awesomely broad shoulders a couple of times, too. All three were becoming tired when Sarah announced that tea was ready.
"Could we have it by the pool, Sarah?" Robbie asked.
"Of course you can." She smiled down at her employer and his friend; she was pleased to see that they were getting on so well with one another. Sarah had seen the pair behave rather formally towards each other at first, but they seemed to be recapturing something of their previous closeness recently.
Knowing that she was catering to a pre-teen, Sarah decided to serve up hamburgers. She'd got hold of a recipe for homemade burgers, which she thought Ben would like. So long as she served meat, and plenty of it, she knew that her food would be a hit with the diners. Though Sarah insisted on serving a salad with the meal too; she wanted the food to be as nutritionally balanced as possible.
The three sat at one of the wooden poolside tables, dripping water onto the tiles below. The heat from the pool combined with the late spring weather outdoors, meant that they were warm enough.
"Oh Rob, these're great." Ben said with a mouthful of burger.
"Ben! How many times have I told you not to talk with your mouthful?" Carl scolded.
Robbie smiled. "It's okay."
A little later in the meal, Carl told his fellow diners' how his work was progressing. He loved working in older houses. Although he was originally a builder by trade, he actually felt more affinity to woodworking. He loved the feel, the warmth which wood exuded. Carl was a craftsman, he enjoyed creating things from his bare hands, and seeing those creations put to good use. He also liked working in the pleasant surroundings of Robbie's house. He'd always loved visiting the place as a boy, wondering what it would be like to live there, settling down in the evening in front of the large log burning fireplace in the Drawing room on a winter's evening.
"Okay Ben, I guess we ought to be making a move home now." Carl said after thanking Rob for his hospitality.
"Aww, dad, can't we stay a bit longer?"
"I'm sure Rob has things to do, which don't involve listening to a spotty lad like you."
"I'm not spotty! Well, I've got this one blackhead here." He pointed to a minor blemish on his chin.
"No, honestly, I've got nothing planned, just another boring night in front of the idiot box. You two can stay if you like." Robbie said hoping they would. He'd really enjoyed the last couple of hours. His two guests seemed to compliment one another really well. Carl the more dominant with Ben adding surprisingly intelligent asides too. Robbie couldn't remember how long it had been since he'd had such a relaxing time. Although he had a few friends in London, not many could be classed as particularly close. They always seemed to be discussing their work; Robbie had grown tired of their seemingly constant games of competitive one-upmanship.
"Well, you've got school to get ready for tomorrow, and I've got things to do as well. There's a pile of ironing that needs doing. Believe me Rob, if I don't tackle it soon, we wont' have anything to wear."
Somehow Robbie couldn't picture his macho friend stood at an ironing board.
"Yeah, and he's rubbish at it, too." Ben said narrowly avoiding a playful swipe to his left ear from his father.
"Okay, but we really must do this again, and soon." Robbie told the pair. "I don't know about you, but I've really enjoyed myself this evening."
"Yeah, I have too." Carl added.
Robbie's guests went into the changing rooms, showered off the chlorine and got back into their street clothes. Robbie remained in his seat mulling over their dinner conversation.
Ben had asked Carl if he could spend some of the summer up at the house, swimming and reading some of Robbie's books.
Carl told him that Robbie would have other plans for the summer. Robbie said that he was going to try and start up writing some computer software, but he had no definite hard and fast rule on when to begin. He said he'd welcome Ben's company. Carl had been pleased because otherwise Ben would have had to stop at his grandparents' house. Whilst this was okay for the odd day, he knew that Ben soon grew bored. His dad had two topics of conversation, building and sport. Neither of which interested Ben. Carl's mother still worked part time at Woolworth's, so he knew that Ben would often be faced with sitting with his granddad for extended periods. Stan couldn't get out all that often due to his Parkinson's disease.
Not wishing to impose on Robbie's generosity, Carl told his impatient son that he'd think about allowing him to spend some of the summer at the house. Robbie remembered Ben turning to him and saying in a stage whisper, "It's alright Rob, I'll work on him." This caused the other two to laugh.
"Okay Rob, I'll see you tomorrow at eight?" Carl said just as he and Ben emerged from the changing rooms.
"Yeah mate, no problem." Robbie showed his guests out of the house, and then he returned to the changing rooms and cleaned himself up.
That evening Robbie thought he'd go on the Internet and do some research on Ben's condition, seeing if he could help alleviate his symptoms. It seemed that the Jacuzzi family had initially developed their famous whirlpool to help arthritis sufferers. Robbie would have ordered a Jacuzzi on the spot, but common sense told him that Carl would feel desperately uncomfortable about him throwing his money around. Therefore he did a search for pool equipment. He jotted down some ideas, but thought he better contact the hospital the next day, just to make sure.
"It was great at Rob's house, wasn't it, dad?"
Once Carl had made a ham-fisted attempt at the ironing, he and Ben had settled themselves on the sofa and watched TV. Much to Carl's delight, Ben had asked to adopt the same positions as of a few nights earlier.
"Yeah son, I remember using the pool years ago, me and Rob would spend hours in the thing." Carl's mind drifted back to the really comfortable camaraderie that he and Robbie used to share; the two never seemed to argue, Rob just seemed to tag along with whatever Carl suggested. Frank, Robbie's dad labelled them 'Me and my shadow', Carl smiled at the remembered epithet.
"I really would like to spend some of the summer up there with him, dad. He's a really neat guy. What with the pool, his library and his computer, I'd have a good time there."
"I wouldn't want you getting under his feet, Ben."
"Oh dad, I wouldn't do that. If he needs to work, I can easily find a book to read or something. My back feels much easier tonight after being in the pool. It sure beats those horrible floor exercises."
"I think you need to do those as well, son."
"Yuck." Ben pulled a face.
"Okay, maybe we'll let you off with them today, then."
Ben turned round in his dad's arms and kissed his cheek. "You're the best dad in the world." He treated Carl to a hug, and then he turned sideways and rested the left side of his head on Carl's right shoulder. Carl drew his strong arms around his son and gave him an affectionate squeeze.
"And you're the best son in the world too." Carl said, kissing the top of Ben's head.
The two remained in the same position for some time, neither of them needing to speak. They continued to watch the wildlife documentary, which was detailing the rather gory life of the White Shark.
Ben, who wasn't really scared, would give his dad an extra squeeze during the more violent scenes.
" It's almost your bedtime, special son of mine." Carl eventually said.
"Yeah, guess so." Ben said reluctantly. He was rather comfortable where he was on the couch with his dad. "At least I don't need to take a bath tonight, because of the shower at Rob's."
"That's true. Have you got your books all packed for tomorrow's lessons?"
"Yeah dad, I always do."
"I know, you're a good kid. You looking forward to going up to St Winifred's next year?"
"Err, no."
"Why's that? It's a good school, you know."
"Yeah, but I don't like Penguins." This was the rather unkind nickname for the nuns who taught at the school. "Why do I have to go to a Catholic school, dad? We're not Catholic."
"Well, it's a much better school than the comprehensive. You'll get a really good education there, and the Penguins aren't that bad really. At least now Sister Margarita's retired. She was a bit fierce. I remember when Rob stepped on the old dragon's foot. That was when we first met actually. He'd come round the corner and knocked the books I was carrying out of my hands. Once he'd picked them up, he kind of stepped backward and onto Sister Margarita's foot."
Ben laughed.
"Anyway, you'll be okay at St Winifred's."
"Yeah, guess so. Some of my friends from my class are going too. Though I'm not looking forward to having loads of new people to get used to." St Winifred's was fed by a number of middle schools in the area.
"I'm sure you'll be okay once you settle in." Carl was always naturally outgoing, he didn't quite understand the problems that more reserved people faced in new situations.
"Go on up to bed, I'll be up in a bit to tuck you in."
"Can I have a story, please, daddy?" Ben said affecting a little boy's voice.
"Only if baby Ben is a very good boy." Carl said playing along.
As Ben scampered up the stairs, Carl smiled and thanked whoever it was for sending Ben to him. He was blessed, and he knew it.
After watching the end of the wildlife documentary, 'Why do they always concentrate on shark's?' Carl mused; he turned off the set, performed his usual nighttime checks, and ascended the stairs. He went into his son's room and sat on the bed looking down at his boy.
"I think you're a bit old for 'Goldilocks And The Three Bears' aren't you?"
Ben giggled. "Yeah well, why don't you read this then." Ben handed over a much-thumbed copy of 'Harry Potter'.
"Again?"
"Yeah, it's my favourite." Ben admitted.
"Okay then. Are you sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin." This was the tag line to 'Listen With Mother', a radio programme that Carl often heard when he was very small. Ben liked to hear the line, even though the majority of the times he heard it, he was actually lying in bed, and not sitting, but it was one of the many comforting rituals that he and Carl revelled in performing together. Ben lay back and listened to his father's rich but soft voice speaking the familiar words.
Ben looked up into his dad's face, which was illuminated by his bedside light; the left side of the face was in shadow. As Carl read, Ben mused at how lonely his dad's life was. He rarely had a night out, only occasionally going for a drink with other men from the building sites he sometimes worked on. Ben could never remember his dad going out on a date with a woman.
"I think that's enough for tonight, Squirt." Carl said closing the book and rubbing his eyes. It had been a long day for him; he'd put in several hours at Robbie's, and although the work wasn't that physically demanding it took a fair amount of his concentration.
"Yeah dad, thanks."
"Your very welcome." Carl said as he stood up, straightened his son's bedclothes and ruffled his hair. "Sleep tight."
"And don't let the bed bugs bite." Ben finished the familiar line.
Carl smiled down at his son lying in his single bed; he reached over and turned off the bedside light, walked to the door, turned round, gave his son one last glance, and then he padded along to his own bedroom.
Carl got into the double bed alone. He'd slept alone for the past eight or so years; he considered having a wank, but frankly didn't feel like it. Jerking off let out a little of the tension, but it did little else, really. Carl had shared the bed with Maureen; she'd been his only sex partner. He'd heard stories on the building sites filled with lurid details of how to bang a woman, he was secretly revolted by their crude words, but not wishing to seem different, he joined in with the bawdy banter. He, along with his mates, would whistle and catcall at any likely looking female who passed by. In truth his sex life at home had fallen off considerably. Towards the end of their relationship, Carl and Maureen had sex a couple of times a month. Even though wanking wasn't that satisfactory, it seemed to Carl to be more enjoyable than making love with his wife. Carl didn't know why he felt that way, he just concluded that he had a low sex drive; he certainly couldn't discuss it with anyone. He then thought about the precious soul lying in the bedroom across the landing. He realised that although he slept alone, he was happier than he had a right to expect. Plumping up his pillows, Carl turned over and drifted into a dreamless sleep.
It was Friday morning, and Robbie was having a frustrating phone call. He was trying to get some information out of the physiotherapy department at the hospital. He was attempting to find out what equipment they had in the pool to aid joint mobility.
"I'm sorry, but we cannot discuss individual patients care with you." The technician or whatever he was at the other end of the phone explained to Robbie impatiently.
"Yes, I'm fully aware of that. I'm speaking hypothetically."
The technician didn't understand, and tried again to fob Robbie off with the usual blanket declaration of non-disclosure of patient information.
"Could I speak to your senior, please?" Robbie eventually said.
"She'll only tell you the same as me."
"Put her on!" Robbie said through gritted teeth.
A moment later a pleasant sounding female voice came over the instrument. "Can I help you at all?"
Robbie took a deep breath and began. "Oh, believe me, I hope so. I have a friend who suffers from Ankylosing Spondylitis, he is not a patient of yours yet." Robbie hoped this would block the expected comments. "I have access to a swimming pool, and I understand there are certain pieces of equipment I could buy that would help him to support his spine, etc, and help to alleviate his symptoms. I've been on the Internet and got some ideas, but I'd like to run them past you, if I may?"
The woman understood Robbie's question, and spent a few minutes out-lining what equipment the hospital had, or would like to have. She pointed out reasonably that everyone's condition differed; therefore not every piece of equipment would be suitable. Though she did say that the patient was often the best judge of what worked best for him.
Robbie made a few notes, thanked the unnamed woman profusely, then he went down the backstairs; Carl was working on the main staircase. He told both Carl and Sarah that he was going out for a while, and not to prepare lunch for him.
The woman on the phone had told Robbie where he could get hold of the equipment he was seeking. Robbie headed for Liverpool, a city he hadn't been to for quite some years. Though fortunately the specialist sporting goods shop was on the outskirts of the city. Robbie bought what he thought he might need, as well as a couple of Lilo air mattresses, a beach ball, and some other fun items, too. His dad, who had rarely got into the pool, had never thought of buying such things.
As he was driving back home, Robbie mused at why he was doing these things. Although he'd not exactly labelled himself as a philanthropist, he just enjoyed doing small things to help those he cared about. Was he trying to engineer things so Ben and by extension Carl would spend more time with him? Robbie didn't know.
Although he'd only spent a few moments alone with Ben, Robbie had disclosed his biggest darkest secret to him. He couldn't understand why he'd spoken aloud to someone he barely knew. It was just something in those kind understanding eyes of Ben's, which told him that he could unburden himself. The tears he'd shed were ones of relief; at last someone else knew that he, Robert James Foster, had been and still was deeply in love with Carl Anthony Powers. The remembered declaration, though it was only uttered at a low volume, gave Robbie a warm feeling as he drove home. And his love would be home waiting for him; Robbie blocked out the fact that Carl was unaware that he was loved, and he was only there because he was being paid to do a job of work. These were mere details. Parking his BMW in the garage out the back, Robbie entered the house via the rear of the house, and stowed away his goodies without Carl seeing them. He so wanted Carl and Ben to spend another evening by the pool, but common sense told him that he mustn't be greedy; they had their own lives to lead, and Robbie didn't want to come across as being too desperate for friendship.
Later that day, when Carl had packed away his tools, he said his goodbyes to Robbie. He had hoped that his friend would invite him to swim, or even just to talk for a little while. Ben was busy with an after-school activity, so Carl would be at a loose end. Robbie hadn't offered, and Carl didn't feel comfortable enough to bring up the subject. So because of their lack of communication, two people parted, neither of them wanting the separation.
As Carl drove home, he realised that he'd only be working at the house for a few more days. This saddened him. He'd enjoyed the odd few words that he'd exchanged with Robbie as their paths had crossed. Carl even quite liked Mrs Grimes, Robbie's cook. She'd always had a smile for him when he had visited as a youngster, sneaking him an extra biscuit or piece of pie when no one else was looking. Though Carl loved his own mother very much, she had never been a particularly good cook; therefore Carl had regarded Sarah's small acts of kindness as being particularly welcome.
To be continued.