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This story involves consensual sex between two men. If you don't want to read about behavior of this type, look elsewhere. If you shouldn't read this for legal reasons or because you are deemed too young, go away.
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The Fishing Trip
He was facing away from me, silhouetted by glistening light. Pinks and golds from the sky and the matching reflection off the pond mingled with yellows and oranges from the fire. The warm tones hugged the edges of his amber skin, a radiant aura around the dark hole he left in the panorama.
Although I couldn't see any detail at the moment, I knew his body intimately. I could fill in the soft curve of his lower back. I knew the dimples in his asscheeks, matching the ones formed by his shy smiles. His body was smooth -- hairless -- save for small patches above his cock and under each arm. His waist was still tight, and his stomach still flat. He worked out enough to satisfy his vanity -- and perhaps a bit more. He had broad shoulders and muscular arms. His pecs were a perfect handful from behind, and his nipples were large tips pointing down right along the rim of his muscle.
This was our fifteenth trip to the cabin. One week in August every summer of fishing -- or at least that is what our calendars said.
I thought back to our first trip fourteen years ago. I was a year and a half out of college. Relatively new in my job. Our boss hired an intern that summer and assigned him to me. That was how I met Jason. He was an international student from Taiwan between his junior and senior years of college. Although it seemed I was two years ahead of him because of his compulsory military service and an internship in Taipei, we were actually the same age.
We ended up working well as a team, basically equals. At the end of July, our boss assigned us a big project, a pitch to be made on August 31st. It was a tight timeline regardless, but I had a week of vacation scheduled, and then one week later, a week before the pitch, Jason headed back to university. It was hard to imagine that it would get done to the level of our other work.
Jason and I had a big day planned the Friday before I left. Surprisingly, he was late that morning. This was the first time he wasn't punctual. I started working without him, trying to figure this out. About 45 minutes after the day began, Vincent, our boss, rapped on the doorframe of the conference room we had claimed.
"Hey, Mark, I just heard from Jason. The apartment above his flooded. He has gathered his stuff and moved out. He'll be here in a while. I am going to try to figure out what to do with him for the next two weeks. I really didn't have it in the budget to pay for a hotel room."
"Shit. That sucks. Maybe you can get the landlord to cover it?"
"Unlikely, Tanner is a cheap bastard. Probably his fault that it flooded in the first place. How is the project?"
"Well, we were planning on getting everything planned out today, so Jason had clear goals while I am gone next week."
"Fuck. That's right. How far is this going to put you behind?"
"Well, I assume Jason is going to be, understandably, kinda useless today."
"Yeah."
"It's gonna be difficult. I have internet at the cabin, and was planning to check emails daily. But I don't know if that will be enough. And before you ask. No. I am not shifting my vacation." I knew Vincent was going to ask; he was very focused on success. But I also knew that, ultimately, he was a good boss and understood the value of happy employees, especially at a small company.
"Fair enough. Well, I guess I'll go try to figure out some housing for Jason."
I spent some time thinking through our project, and then I had a thought. I debated with myself for a few minutes before heading to Vincent's office. He was on the phone and held up a finger -- one sec.
"Ok, thank you anyway." He hung up the phone. "Shit, there is some big event this week. All the cheap rooms are booked out. I guess I'll have to call Dory and ask her to make up the spare room."
"Actually, I might have another solution." Vincent gestured for me to go on. "Before I suggest this, I want you to know that I am only making this suggestion because of the totality of the circumstances."
"Ok."
"If Jason is interested, he could come to the cabin with me for the week. We could work in the morning, and I'll get my vacation in in the afternoon."
"You would do that?" Vincent looked shocked. He had a sense of how important the cabin was to me. "Really, you don't have to."
"I know, but it will solve all the current problems."
"Are you sure?"
"No. But I can't see any other way to get the work done, Jason housed, and me on vacation."
"Thank you so much."
"We do need to check with Jason first."
"Of course." Vincent tapped the end of his pen on the desk a few times. "Actually, I have a counter proposal for you. First, you don't take vacation next week."
"I said I am not..." Vincent held up a hand.
"Please hear me out. You don't take vacation next week. You and Jason, if he is amenable, go to your cabin and work from there in the mornings. It will count as a work week. You can have the afternoons to do as you please. I think the two of you working together in the mornings will be more productive than Jason would be alone here, so likely more work will get done. You can have a different week of vacation sometime this fall. I'll also throw in $400 for food."
"You don't have to do that."
"That is less than half the rate I was just getting quoted a night for a hotel this week. It's not a problem."
At five pm, Jason, all of his stuff, and I loaded into the car and drove north. The cabin was about 4 hours from our office. I had come packed so I could pull out from work and sleep in my little slice of heaven. The cabin, my cabin, had been my grandfather's. Nestled in 100 acres of forest, he had built a small fishing lodge. It was rustic, although close enough to a road to bring in electricity and wifi. It had two small bedrooms and a great room with a kitchen and eating nook. When Grandpops first built the cabin, it had an outhouse, but once he and Nan had had children, they attached a small bathroom to one side. It also had a screened-in porch overlooking the pond. It was more of a large pool in a small stream, but Grandpops had called it the pond, so I did as well. Across the pond to the west was a small mountain. When I was younger, Grandpops had made me cut a trail up to the summit so we could hike up and survey the area. There were ledges overlooking the pond. On top of that mountain, I felt like I was alone above a sea of trees.
When my Grandpops died a few years ago, my mother planned to sell the land. She was shocked to find that the land had not been left to her but rather to me. And Grandpops had left me enough money to maintain the land for at least twenty years until I had enough money on my own to take care of it. My mother didn't like the cabin. She still resented being forced to spend her summers there as a kid. Grandpops knew she saw it as a source of some cash. But it was my special place, and Grandpops knew that as well.
As we pulled off the highway about halfway, Jason and I stopped at a convenience store slash diner to grab dinner and a few things we would need. There was a grocery store about forty minutes from the cabin, and I had packed a bunch of dry goods, but I wanted some eggs and bacon for the morning.
Sally, who had taken this place over when her parents moved on, greeted me when I came in. I tried to make it up to the cabin at least once a month, and this was always my stop. She was a year or two older than me and we had known each other as we grew up.
"Who's this handsome devil here with you, Mark? I haven't seen you bring anyone with you since..." she trailed off, realizing she might have stepped in it. Sally had a thing for me when we were teens. She finally toned down her flirting the one time I brought Scott with me and introduced him as my boyfriend. That was the one and only time I had brought anyone with me to the cabin. Scott and I broke up shortly after. A big part of the breakup was that he just didn't understand the cabin. He looked at it with the same eyes as my mother. (The direct precipitate was catching him balls deep in the neighbor's kid. He was legal, but our understanding of "monogamous" was obviously different. As painful as it was, catching him turned a long process of our relationship crumbling into an abrupt ending.)
"Hi, Sally. This is Jason, a work colleague. His apartment flooded last night, and he needed a place to go, so he's getting dragged along on my vacation."
"Oh, nice to meet you, J! I'm Sally."
Jason smiled and smiled and greeted her. We grabbed a table and put in orders for dinner. While we waited, I grabbed the stuff I needed to make breakfast the next morning.
Soon enough, the food arrived, and we tucked in.
"Mark, are you really ok bringing me to your cabin? Sally said you haven't brought anyone?"
"...since Scott. My ex-boyfriend." As I said that, I realized I didn't know if Jason knew I was gay. It had never come up. I also realized how little I knew about him. "The cabin is really special to me. And Scott just never could understand why I wanted to come up alone. When I finally brought him, all he did was complain. The cabin is pretty simple. I hope you're ok with that."
"My grandmother is an aboriginal. She still lives in our family village in the mountains. I always loved going to visit her. My sister could never understand why I liked going somewhere without cell service."
"Well, the cabin does have cell service, although it is a bit weak. And I got internet access a few years ago. But I still don't have a TV."
"It sounds perfect." We settled into a companionable silence, finishing our dinner.
It was about 7:45 when we got back in the car. Soon, Jason had drifted off. He had been up since 4 am when water started dripping into his room. I had not really thought about it until Sally brought it up, but this was the first time I had brought someone to my place since Scott. I hadn't had time to think through it during the day, but the second half of the drive, I relived some pretty painful memories from a few years ago.
I gently shook Jason awake as we came to a stop near the cabin. There was a full moon in the inky blue sky. It sparkled off of the pond and lit the clearing with a white light.
" Chuang qian ming yue guang, " Jason began, in what I could only assume was Chinese. " Yi shi di shang shuang/Ju tou wang ming yue/ Di tou si gu xiang. "
"Um..." I didn't know how to start to ask about it.
"It is the most famous ancient Chinese poem. Every Chinese kid knows it."
"Oh, nice."
"Let me try to translate it quickly. The moon shines, is shining, in front of my bed. It looks like snow? No... not snow, white when it gets cold."
"Frost?"
"Yeah. It looks like frost. I raise my head to look at the moon. I lower my head to think of home."
"Wow. That's beautiful."
"I have not thought of that in years. It just popped into my head when I saw this."
We unpacked the car, walking through the frosty moonlight. Jason put his stuff in the spare bedroom with two twin beds. I had to dig around to find sheets, and I made the bed as he put food in the refrigerator and cabinet.
"Hey J, I always have a glass of whiskey when I arrive. Would you care for one?" I pulled a bottle of expensive Scotch out of my bag. It was a tradition my Grandpops started when I was about 12. Jason nodded, and I grabbed two mismatched glasses and poured us each a finger of the brown nectar. While my paycheck wasn't huge, I always spent the money to get my Grandpops' favorite vice, Oban.
We pulled the cushions out to the couch on the porch to look at the moon on the pond. I wasn't sure what he was thinking, but I knew I was thinking that this felt more like home than any place else on earth. And it was jarring to have another person here with me.
I was lost in my thoughts when I realized Jason's breathing had evened out, and his head had fallen forward. I woke him again and steered him towards his bed.
"I'll cook breakfast in the morning. After that, we can make a plan for the week." Jason nodded sleepily. I don't know if he really heard anything.
I took the opportunity to go to bed as well. While there were lots of things floating around in my head, I always slept well at the cabin. The sounds of the forest around me quickly lulled me to sleep.
I woke with the sun the following day. I hadn't brought any pajamas because I packed before I knew I would have a guest. I pulled a pair of jeans commando and headed to the kitchen. I got some cowboy coffee brewing in a kettle on the stove. (I always thought about getting one of those Italian stovetop coffee pots, but Grandpops had made cowboy coffee, and I didn't see a reason to make any change.) I pulled out the bacon and started frying it up.
Soon, Jason emerged with a groan. "What time is it?" he mumbled. He was in a tee shirt and athletic shorts, the most casual I had ever seen him. He looked great in them. His legs were muscular, and his arms were toned.
"Early," I replied, straining him a cup of coffee. I knew he liked cream in his coffee, but I hadn't remembered to grab any at Sally's yesterday.
"Ugh."
"Sorry, I forgot cream. I hope black is ok this morning. How'd you sleep?
"Umm..."
"Yeah, those beds are pretty lumpy. I remember from when I was a kid. Sorry, I never have guests, so I don't think about them often. A nap by the pond this afternoon will do wonders." He stretched, and his shirt pulled up, exposing a whisper of smooth honey skin above his shorts. I quickly turned back to the stove. Forming a crush on my colleague would not make this week any easier.
When the bacon was done, I scrambled some eggs. While we ate, we discussed a plan for the day. The first rule was not work or even talk of work. Even though my vacation, our vacation, was going to be marred by work, I demanded the weekends on either side be held to a sacred standard of relaxation.
The first order of business was to head into town and get groceries for the week. One of the first things I learned about Jason was that he enjoyed cooking. His apartment wasn't well equipped, but the freedom to make all his own meals was one of the things he had been enjoying this summer. As I cleaned up from breakfast, he took stock of what we had.
We both needed to shower, so he went first as I made a plan for meals for the rest of the week. The store wasn't too far, but it was far enough away that running out for something you forgot was really inconvenient. I left a number of the dinners blank, as Jason had expressed interest in making some dinners. I was just finishing up as Jason stepped out of the bathroom. Since the bathroom was a late addition, it was opened directly into the great room. I knew he was cute. And based on how his clothes fit his body, I had assumed he was fit. But damn. When he walked out in just a towel, my imagination had not done that man any justice. He obviously spent time in the gym. While he didn't have a six-pack, he had definition in his abs and stomach. His chest was glorious. But what I noticed most was his clavicles and traps. I couldn't pinpoint precisely what it was about this part of him. It wasn't something I had ever noticed on a man before. But the curves and swooping divots and mounds were aesthetically perfect.
I must have been staring because Jason looked up at me sitting at the kitchen table, flushed pink, and scurred to the guest room. Shit. After last night, I knew James knew I was gay. I hope my ogling didn't make him too uncomfortable.
It was my turn to shower. I thought about bringing clean clothes in with me, but fuck it. This was my home, and I would not change too much for Jason. (Normally, I spent much of my time here naked. I was going to back off on that front, but dressing in the bathroom so as not to make him uncomfortable, no.) When I finished, I wrapped a towel around my waist and checked myself out in the bathroom mirror. While I didn't have nearly as nice of a body as Jason (I didn't like to go to the gym,) I had been blessed with good genes. While I didn't have any definition in my stomach, it was mostly still flat. I had decent pecs with a light fur of hair dusting them. I knew I had a nice ass and great legs. While I wasn't as cute as Jason, more people than just my mother had called me handsome.
I stepped out of the bathroom. Jason was sitting in the great room, facing the bathroom door. I noted that because there were a number of places he could have sat that didn't have a direct view of my path from the bathroom to the bedroom. I knew his eyes were on me. I felt myself speed up, scuttling to my room. I didn't mean to do it, but feeling his eyes on me caused it to happen. This was going to be an awkward week if we kept this up.
I opened my bag. Dressing this week was going to be challenging. I generally didn't wear much, if anything, at the cabin. I had brought a few changes of clothing to go to town in, but that was it. Jason was going to see a lot of repeats. I threw my jeans back on and grabbed a t-shirt.
We headed to town. Jason asked about a few items of cookware, so our first stop was the local hardware store. In a small town, that was the best chance to find some of what he was looking for, although I didn't have high hopes. Surprisingly, we found a dusty wok down in the corner of a bottom shelf of the home goods aisle. While there was nothing else he was looking for, he seemed to think that was enough. Although Jason offered to purchase it, I happily paid for it out of the money Vincent had given me.
After that we went to the store and filled a cart with supplies. Jason basically took one of everything from the store's "Asian" section. It was amazing how much food two 24 year olds put in a cart for a week. With the rest of Vincent's food budget, plus what I had planned to spend on food, I was able to grab another bottle of Oban and two cases of good beer.
After shopping, we headed to the local cafe to grab another coffee and a sandwich for the road. Although it was a small village, it was a crossroads for a number of outdoor activities, so the town punched above its weight for some things, like a good cafe. Maybe later in the week we would come into town for dinner. Maybe I could convince Vincent to pay for that too.
When we got back to the house, we unpacked the groceries and got the kitchen sorted for the week. We headed down to the pond to eat our sandwiches when we finished. We didn't have a dock because we only had a canoe, and Grandpops had never thought we needed one. By the sand bar, several large flat rocks jutted out into the pool. We picnicked on the main rock, occasionally chatting about nothing but mostly sitting quietly.
After we finished, I took the trash up to the house and grabbed a couple of beach towels. We spread them out, and both lay down for a nap on the "Napping Rock," a large flat rock under the cover of a large elm with a few perfect divots to curl up in. When I woke, the sun had shifted a good deal. And I was sweaty. Jason was sitting with his feet dangling in the water.
"Wanna go swimming?"
"Umm... I did not bring a swimsuit with me this summer." Shit. Swimsuit. I never wore a swimsuit. I didn't even have one here. I swallowed. I was not going to let bringing Jason on this trip impact my relaxation.
"You can swim in your underwear or your shorts, but I always swim naked," I said as I peeled my shirt off of my body. I shimmed out of my jeans, dropping them in a denim puddle at my feet. I ran down the length of the rock and launched myself into the water. It was cold mountain water, even in mid-August. But it felt so good. I swam underwater for a few moments. When I came up, I turned and saw Jason standing, shirtless. He hesitated for a moment but then dropped his shorts, leaving him in just a pair of tighty whities. He walked down to the end of the rock. I could see him looking for a way to lower himself in.
Shit,' I thought, I hope he can swim.' Any fears I had were assuaged when he shrugged and leapt in.
He popped up, spluttering, " Cao, it is cold." With a few confident strokes, he swam up to me.
I nodded across the pool at a few rocks that were higher above the water. "Wanna jump?" I took off. If you swam to the side of one of the rocks, there was a bit of a path I had worn over the years of climbing and jumping. As I climbed up the rocks, I realized that I was giving Jason quite the show. Whatever, he could choose not to look. I checked behind me, and Jason was right there. His white briefs were mostly transparent and clinging to his hips. I could see his dark bush and reddish uncut cock, and tight balls. As he turned, I could also see the dark cleft between the two perfect mounds of his ass. I spent a moment explaining the jumping spots and the couple of rocks to watch out for.
We must have spent the next hour climbing and jumping. Jason was a bit of a daredevil and soon was doing flips and other tricks as he launched. The sun had now dipped behind the trees, and it was getting a bit cool. I said I was done. Jason said he was going for one more. I swam out to an underwater rock. It was just deep enough to sit, mostly submerged, on it. It was one of my favorite places to lounge on a hot day, and it was just far enough out from the bank that the afternoon light still touched it.
I looked back up at the rocks and just saw Jason's head coming into view at the highest rock. As he clambered up, I saw that he had stripped off his wet underwear and was buck-naked on the highest point above the pool. He shouted something and launched himself out. He leapt so high the last rays of the dipping sun caught his form. I will never forget the snapshot of my beautiful guest, naked for the first time, glowing in the afternoon sun.
He splashed down. When he popped up, he had a wide grin splitting his face. I grinned back.
"Wanna head back and think about getting dinner together?"
"Sure."
We lazily paddled across the pool, in no rush to do anything. It finally felt like vacation. I could see Jason relaxing as well. The cabin side of the pool was still lit by the afternoon sun. We both pulled ourselves out of the water and, with unspoken agreement, turned and sat on the edge of the stone, facing the sun and soaking up the warmth as it kissed our skin.
Too soon, the sun dipped below the trees. In the shadow, it wasn't exactly warm. I stood and offered a hand to Jason. I helped him up, and we found ourselves standing close. He was a bit shorter than me, and I looked down into his face.
He reached out his hand and touched my forearm. "Thank you."
"For what?"
"For taking care of me. For rescuing me yesterday. For sharing this." He turned and looked out across the pool.
"It is nothing."
"No. It is something. Sally said you never bring people here."
This was getting heavy. I exaggerated a shiver. "Let's dry off and head back to the house. We can have a whiskey before dinner." I turned and went to grab the towel I had slept on. I quickly dried off the little bit of water left. I thought about wrapping the towel around me but decided to throw it over my shoulder. I grabbed my jeans and tee shirt and headed up to the house. Jason did the exact same thing and walked across my lawn and up to my cabin with a towel over his shoulder and clothes in his hand. He didn't seem to mind, so it looked like some of my worry about clothes may have been unnecessary.
I hung the towel on a drying rack on the porch. As I turned, Jason tossed me his as well. I hung it up and headed into the cabin. I tossed my clothes into my bedroom and grabbed our whiskey glasses off the drain board. Jason was already sitting on the couch, clothes thrown across the back of one of the chairs. His back was against the arm, and one of his legs was tucked under him, facing the middle of the sofa. Handing him his glass, I matched his position. The last man I had shared this couch with was Scott. Sitting here naked with Jason, I realized that the weekend here with Scott, the only time we were naked was in bed together. It was more comfortable to have Jason, a man I barely knew, than Scott, a man I had been considering marrying -- although probably for the wrong reason of assuming it would fix our relationship.
"Mark," Jason started, "you are gay, right?"
"Yes. Is that ok with you?" I realize that was a strange question to ask a man willingly sitting naked on a couch with me, but it made sense in my head at the moment.
"Yeah. I have never met a gay person before." He stopped for a minute. "Well, there were some... what is the word: like a girl?" He limped his wrist in a stereotypical manner.
"Effeminate?"
"Yes, effeminate boys in my high school. We teased them. But I do not know if they were gay." The conversation lulled, and we just sat with our thoughts and whiskey.
"How about I cook some burgers tonight? You can be in charge of dinner tomorrow."
"Yeah, good," Jason said distractedly. He was obviously still back in high school.
I grabbed an apron and threw it on. One thing I learned in my nudism was that splattering grease is painful. While the burgers cooked, I made a simple salad.
When the burgers were on the table, I headed out and placed a hand on Jason's shoulder. He jumped. "Oh. Sorry."
"Hey, no worries. Sorry to scare you. Burgers are ready."
The rest of dinner was quiet, Jason's past still wrapping around him and holding him tight. After dinner, Jason excused himself and went to the guest room. Obviously, something was going on. I hoped my special place would give him the space to figure it out. I cleaned the dinner dishes and grabbed a beer from the fridge. I thought about lighting a fire, but I wanted Jason to be a part of that. I just headed back to the porch to watch the moonrise. I sat on the couch and grabbed a blanket. It wasn't exactly cold, but it was nice to have around my shoulders.
While I couldn't see the moon cresting the horizon because of the direction of the cabin, I watched something just as amazing. Slowly, the moonlight crept down the hill on the other side of the pond. Now, all I could see was the image from Jason's poem. It looked like winter frost descending on the trees. As the moonlight reached the jumping rocks, I heard soft footsteps.
"May I join you?"
I nodded. Jason, still naked, came and sat right next to me. He leaned his back against me. Without thinking, I opened the blanket and wrapped it around us. He sighed deeply.
"Is this ok?" I asked.
"Better than ok," he mumbled. While something had shifted, he was still lost to the mists of his history. And we just sat there, together, but a world apart. I thought through all my past boyfriends. The guys I had dated and played with in high school and college. And Scott, the person I thought was my true love. I shook myself out of that thought spiral I had been down too many times. It was late, and the sun came up early. I realized Jason had fallen asleep nestled against me.
I gently shook him. "Time for bed, buddy."
Groggily, he nodded and stood. He headed to the bathroom to take care of business. I rinsed and tossed the beer can and measured out coffee for the morning. I grabbed bread and eggs and quickly threw together a French toast casserole to sit in the fridge overnight. I heard the bathroom door open and looked across the room. There was Jason, half asleep, and naked, backlit in the doorway.
As he stepped into the room, I looked over at him.
"Goodnight, Jason. Sleep well."
"Goodnight, Mark. Thank you."
I did what I needed in the bathroom and got into bed. I was just about to drift off to sleep when I heard my door slowly creak open. I was surprised to see Jason in a pair of underwear illuminated by the moonlight. (I guess seeing anyone other than Jason would have been much more surprising.)
"You ok, buddy?"
"Um."
"What's up?"
"That bed is uncomfortable. Can I sleep with you?" Well, shit. That was unexpected. One of the creature comforts I had put in when I had inherited the cabin was a good king-sized bed. Even though it took up almost all the floor space in the bedroom, it was worth it.
"Um. I guess so."
Jason headed to the empty side of the bed. He curled up on his side, facing away from me. My usual ease at falling asleep at the cabin was ruined that night. I lay on my back for a long time, the rhythm of his steady breathing drowning out the lullaby of the woods. Finally, I drifted off to sleep.
I half woke once in the early morning darkness. The moon had set, and the first morning birds were warming up their song. We had shifted in our sleep. He was now in my arms. It felt good. I quickly drifted back off to sleep.
It was still early, although not quite daybreak, when I woke again. The bed was empty. I got up, turned on the coffee kettle, and, after my morning ablutions, headed to the porch to see if Jason was there. I noticed him sitting out on the rock in the pond, wrapped in a blanket, morning mists rising around him.
When the coffee was done, I made two mugs. Black for me, with cream and a small spoonful of sugar for him. It is strange how little I knew about him, but I did know how he took his coffee, one of the odd intimate details I had picked up working closely with him. I also knew that when he was worried about something, he would play with his left ear lobe, and when he was thinking hard, he had a tendency to spin a pen over his fingers, a trick he said he picked up in high school.
I wrapped a blanket around my shoulders and headed out to bring him some coffee. When I approached, he looked up at me. His face was streaked with tears.
"Do you want to be alone?" I asked as I handed him the steaming mug.
He shook his head no. I put my coffee down and settled onto the rock beside him. I wanted to put my arms around him and take away whatever pain he was feeling, but I gave him space.
We sat silently for a few minutes. I watched the mist rise off the pond, but I sensed that he saw ghosts of the past writhing up.
"In primary school, there was a boy in my class," Jason started. His words were slow. While I knew he was telling me, it almost seemed he just needed to tell the story. "Du Ercen. In grade one, his little teeth fell out, and, for a long time, only the front two grew back. And they were big.
"Soon, we all started calling him Tuzi, rabbit. I don't think he liked it, but soon even the teachers used it. He was resigned to always being `Rabbit.'
"But when we got to junior high school, `Rabbit' was feminant," he looked at me, questioning the last word.
"Effeminate."
"Yes, Effeminate. Rabbit' was effeminate. He spent all his time with the girls in our class. And one of the boys came up with a new name for him. There is a Taoist god named Tu'er Shen -- the rabbit god. He is the deity of men who love men. One of the other boys in my class realized that Du Ercen sounds a lot like Tu'er Shen. So Rabbit' became `the Rabbit God.' Other names came from that. Never directly mean, but always reminding him that we thought he was gay." Jason's story faded; he was lost in his thoughts.
"Ercen was always so strong. We joked he was weak and girly, but he held every name we gave him and never broke." Tears were streaming down his face. "I knew it was hurting him. It had to be. It was hurting me. I knew the position he was in. I knew I was at least a little like him. But he was easy to hurt. But he took everything we gave him and smiled." Jason started to cry more now. I took his coffee from his hands and shifted so I could hug him. We sat there on the rock, Jason crying in my arms, as the morning came to full life. Soon, Jason once again fell asleep in my arms. After holding him for a bit, I shifted. I lay him on the rock, cocooned in his blanket with mine as a pillow.
I headed back up to the cabin to cook breakfast and think about what Jason had said. Teenagers could be so cruel. I get that was true the world over. Any perceived weakness was an opportunity to place yourself above someone else.
Shortly after I took the casserole out of the oven, I noticed Jason rise and grab the blankets to bring them in. As he entered, I asked, "Breakfast?" He nodded and settled into his seat at the table. As I placed two plates on the table and sat down, I realized that I had thought of it as his seat. The table had four chairs. When Grandpops and I were here, he'd always sat at the head of the table, and I sat along one of the sides. I still sat in the same chair. When Scott had come, he sat in my Grandpop's chair. I could not express why it made me uncomfortable, and I knew he would have laughed at me for asking him not to sit there. But Jason had taken the chair across from me, unintentionally leaving space for my Grandpop's spirit.
"I am bisexual," Jason mumbled to his plate, shaking me from my memories. He was frozen. I did not know what to say. "I have never said that out loud, even to myself. I thought I never would."
"Thank you for trusting me."
"I needed to say it for Rabbit." He shook his head. "For Ercen," he corrected himself.
The rest of the meal was quiet -- each of us deep in our own world. I did not know where Jason was, but I thought about my own coming out. The first person I had officially come out to was my prom date. We had gone as friends, and after a lovely evening, while I was dropping her off at home, I blurted out, "I'm gay."
I'll never forget her response, "You're the second one this week."
When he finished, Jason cleared the table and started to do the dishes. I tried to help, but he said I had been doing all the work and he needed to do something. I grabbed a final mug of coffee and went to sit out on the rock.
I heard the porch door slam, and I looked up to see Jason, stripped of the underwear he had been wearing, walking across the lawn to join me, a mug of coffee in hand. He sat beside me, an uncertain distance, closer than two friends, but not quite touching.
"Thank you for listening."
"Thank you for trusting me enough to share," I responded. He blew out through his nose -- a chuckle of sorts.
Silence descended again. I felt comfortable sitting with him; there was no need to fill the air with jabber. We both settled into our thoughts. I assumed he was thinking about the same thing I was: his confession over french toast, the proverbial elephant that now shared the rock with us.
The sun warmed us. Soon, the day had become hot. I got up and headed to the cabin. One thing I had learned the hard way during my first summer here alone was the importance of sunscreen in the middle of the day. We had been lucky yesterday, but I knew neither of us wanted burned nether regions.
I filled my hand with the white cream and handed the bottle to Jason. As I started to rub the lotion into my torso, I felt his hand on my back. He covered my whole back, swiping close to my ass but never crossing an invisible line. When he finished with me, he started to cover himself. Once I had finished my arms and legs, I turned to Jason. He turned, presenting me with his back. I slowly ran my hands along his body. Yes, I was sunscreening him, but the line between utilitarian and erotic was fine. As much as I wanted to do otherwise, I respected the same line between back and ass that Jason had respected on me.
The rest of the day involved frolicking in the water. Our elephant backed off for the day, sitting next to the cabin. At times, we both forgot he was there, but he was always watching.
Jason cooked an amazing Chinese feast for us. Over dinner, we agreed that starting tonight, we would share responsibilities, one cooking, the other washing up. After finishing the dishes, I poured us whiskeys and went out to light a fire. In the dusk, we sat by the first for the first time together on a blanket. Neither of us had had clothing on all day once Jason had stripped his underwear off -- except for me making Jason put on an apron as he fried dinner.
That night, when we went to bed, Jason climbed into my bed. Without discussion, we both knew it was happening and agreed to it. While he didn't turn like he had the night before, nor did he put on underwear, he also clearly stayed on his side of the bed. Again, he fell right to sleep, and his quiet, even breathing was a drum beat in my head keeping me awake. He had come out to me, and then we had completely ignored it. Our elephant was sitting in the bed between us.
I woke early the next morning, Monday. Jason had once again moved over and cuddled up against me. I lay in the weak light, his head on my shoulder, and wondered about this week. Were we going to ignore everything and just float through, observed at each turn by our elephant, or would we face it and talk it away. I came to no decisions but wrestled with letting Jason take things at his own pace or taking the bull by the horns, or the elephant by the tusk, if you will, myself.
Soon my need to piss overcame the moment. I tried to extricate myself without disturbing Jason, but he woke as I stood. After using the bathroom, I turned on the coffee kettle. Jason appeared, mussed with sleep still in the bedroom door.
"Good morning," I greeted him.
"Um, sorry that I was curled up against you. I did not mean to disturb your sleep."
Time to at least acknowledge the elephant, if not address him directly. I approached Jason and put my hands on his upper arms. Looking him directly in the eyes, I told him, "You didn't disturb me at all. I was enjoying it. I am sorry my need to pee woke you up." Jason blushed. He leaned in, pressing against my chest. I wrapped my arms around him. We just stood there, hugging. Soon, the kettle whistled, and I moved to strain us both cups of morning coffee.
After breakfast, we started right in on our work for the week. We spent some time planning our approach for the next five mornings. After about an hour, we had not gotten much done. We had always worked together well before this, so our seeming blockage was confusing. Suddenly, when Jason stood to pour us another mug of coffee, we both realized the problem. We were still naked. It didn't feel like work. We headed to our respective bedrooms. I threw on jeans and a t-shirt. When James came out of his room, he was in a nice button down and gray slacks, exactly how he dressed for the office every day. (Not that I was complaining; that particular pair of pants highlighted his `ass'ets very nicely.) That allowed us to turn the corner, and we got right down to business. We shot off an email of clarifying questions and ideas to Vincent at about 11:30 and decided to call it a day for work.
We fell into a pattern for the rest of the week. Each morning, we would get up and dress for breakfast and work. We would wrap up around noon and have lunch. After lunch, we would strip, slather ourselves in sunscreen, and head outside for the afternoon. Tuesday, when he was rubbing the lotion into my back, Jason broke the invisible line and tenderly made sure that my ass was well protected from the sun. Each night, we settled into bed together, Jason curled against me. Soon, the slow rhythm of his sleep was the only lullaby I needed.
We became physically closer throughout the week -- more incidental touches and casual contact. At various points, we both got erections, as young men are wont to do. But the elephant always interposed. We never acknowledge anything about sexuality. There was a minor tremor of discomfort and question trilling through the soaring symphony of our week.
As Jason cleaned up after breakfast Saturday morning, I packed a picnic. We hiked the hill behind the pond for the first time. We spread a blanket on the ledges and sat for several hours, picking at the food and enjoying the view and the company. It was a perfect afternoon. I had spent many days here alone. I loved that time. But having Jason with me didn't feel like an imposition.
We headed back down for a dip in the pond. Jason dove in and swam right over to the jumping rocks. Sitting on my submerged rock, I watched him play, a perfect blend of an otter and a monkey. His energy finally sated, he popped up in front of me. He scooted in and straddled me, sitting on my lap. This was an escalation in our contact. Our elephant charged down the stone, ready to join us in the water.
"Well, hello there, buddy."
His eyes widened. "Wha... what did you call me?"
"Buddy?" I raised an eyebrow.
"Oh." He sounded almost crestfallen.
"What did you think I had said?"
He whispered something I couldn't make out.
"What?"
Head still drooped, he looked up through his eyelashes at me. Slightly louder, he whispered, "Bunny."
"Oh, no. I didn't."
"I would be ok if you did," he said with a note of hope in his voice.
"Would you like me to?"
Again, he looked away and mumbled. I reached up and gently tilted his face towards me. "I would," he shyly said, trying to turn his head away.
"Ok, Bunny." I had never been one for little pet names, especially like `Bunny.' But as I said it, his eyes lit up. His reaction warmed me deeply. It felt right. I leaned in close, our lips almost touching. Our elephant was charging this way. "May I kiss you?"
"If you want."
I leaned in, and our lips met for the first time. The gentle current of the stream swept our elephant away. I knew it would be back, but for now, we were alone.
It was a gentle kiss. An introduction. A hello. Jason pulled back and looked me straight in the eyes. "Wow." I just held him on my lap; my hands linked behind his lower back. I could feel his erection pressing into my stomach, and I knew he could feel mine as it settled between his ass cheeks. Jason initiated our second kiss, and he was hungry. This was not a greeting but a demand. He broke away to catch his breath. He clenched his butt, wrapping around my shaft, and giggled. Launching himself from the rock, he dove out into the water.
By the time we reached shore, the elephant had found its way back to the cabin. We fell back into our patterns of the week. The only difference, the only acknowledgment of the moment in the pond, was that I called him `Bunny' from that point forward. I could see a slight smile on his face each time.
When I climbed into bed that night, Jason leaned in and kissed me. It was first a peck, but then the hunger returned. Jason climbed on top of me. His erection pressed beside mine. Soon, as we kissed, he started to writhe and push into me. As he moved, my cock popped from between us, sliding between his legs. His hands pulled my head tight. I placed one hand on his ass, trapping my cock between his cheeks, and the other hand wormed between us. I grasped his cock, holding it as he began to thrust into my hand.
His breathing grew ragged, and he pulled away from our kiss, arching to gain power in his thrusts. Ever thrust forward squeezed my cock between his cheeks. The sexual tension that had built throughout the week and crystallized that afternoon soon brought this to an end. Jason shot a huge load between us, and the warm fluid seeping between us was enough to tip me over the edge. I flooded his lower back and crack with seeming gallons of cum.
He collapsed on me, kissing me once again. The hunger replete, our kisses were once again tender.
"Come on, Bunny. We need to wash up." I took Jason by the hand and led him down to the pond. We waded in and used the cold water to wash the stickiness away.
Holding me in the dark, lit only by the dim waning moon, Jason whispered, "Thank you for being my first." We had never talked about it, but deep down, I had known. I didn't say anything in response. I didn't need to. Our hug was enough.
Soon, Jason started to shiver. "Let's go back to bed, Bunny." I could feel his smile in his hug. We walked, hand in hand, back to the cabin. We grabbed a towel to dry off before sliding back into bed. He cuddled against me and drifted off immediately. I basked in his warmth. That was the hottest sex I had had in years. For a final night in the cabin, I was lulled to sleep by the rise and fall of Jason's chest. I woke the next morning to find the bed empty. When I rose, I saw Jason again on the rocks, wrapped in a blanket.
I headed out with two mugs of coffee. He turned when I approached. His face was again stained with the streaks of tears.
"Did I do something wrong?"
"No," he sobbed.
"What is it? Last night?"
"No. Last night was perfect. It is me."
I figured he was struggling with his sexuality. I sat and tried to hug him, but he pulled away.
"I'm sorry."
I was confused. "For what, Bunny?"
That set off a wave of tears. Finally, he was able to get himself back together enough to speak. "I have girlfriend." The tears started again. "Two years." I stiffened, and tears began to drip down my face. He was babbling in his tears. All I could make out was his repeated apologies.
I was hurt. I didn't have a right to be. I never asked. Although he also never offered. I felt used. I had opened my cabin, myself to him, and he stabbed me with this. After kissing me. After last night.
I stood and, without words, walked back to the cabin. I ate some toast and left him some on the table. I dressed and mechanically packed the car, putting everything in it. While I was working, Jason came up and packed his things. He cried the whole time. I was numb and cold.
We had planned to spend most of the day hanging out, leaving at the last possible moment. But I didn't want to have him here anymore.
"Jason" was the first time I had used his name since we initially kissed yesterday. I saw it cut him like a knife. "I think we should leave early."
We got in the car and headed back. We didn't say a word the entire time. I drove him directly to the hotel Vincent had booked him in for his last week at the office.
As he got out of the car, I looked over at him. He had been crying. "Jason." He flinched. "We have to work together this week." He nodded. "Can we forget everything from the past week?"
"Yes," his voice was small.
"We had a nice time at the cabin, and we got work done." He nodded in understanding. He knew the lie I had constructed would hurt us both, but hurt us less than all the other options.
I held it together until I got home before completely breaking down.
The last week of Jason's internship was awkward. We were coldly formal with each other. But we still worked together well. There would be moments where the flow would reconnect for a moment. Our eyes would connect, and we would realize.
We got the project done on his last Friday. Vincent was proud and wanted to take us out for drinks and dinner. He knew he had asked a lot, and we had delivered. I lied and claimed other plans. I wished Jason well in his senior year and headed home to a conversation with my Grandpops through a glass of Oban. I came to a semblance of closure that night, knowing I would never see Jason again.
The next June, I woke up one Saturday morning to an email from Jason. I deleted it without looking. But I had sulked most of the year. I had to know what he said. I open my trash and read his email:
Mark -
I graduated from university last month. I am spending most of my summer in Taiwan relaxing before starting a new job at the end of the August back in the States.
I am so sorry about how last summer ended. It was a perfect week. I think of it fondly.
I know I have no right to ask this. But I was wondering if you would be willing to see me again.
To be upfront, I am still with the same girlfriend. I am going to propose this fall. My parents are very happy.
But I need someone to talk to. I know this is terrible to ask you. But you are the only person I can think of. The only person I trust.
I will be back in the States on Thursday, Aug. 14th. I move into my apartment on Monday the 25th and start work one week later on September 1st. I can come to see you any time during that period.
Thank you.
Jason
I was angry reading his email. He did have no right to ask. But I also felt bad for him. The timing also sucked after the success of last summer's working vacation. I had convinced Vincent to let me work from the cabin for a week before taking a second week off. The dates I had planned? The 15th through the 31st.
I sat on it all weekend. I was torn. He had ripped me apart last summer. I had finally just come to terms with it, but now he came back into my world. Finally, after not being able to sleep late Sunday night or, technically, Monday morning, I replied:
Jason -
That timing is very difficult. I am going to be going to the cabin for those two weeks. If you would like to talk, I will be available on the night of Thursday the 14th.
Mark
Somehow, I fell asleep, but it was terrible. I couldn't get up when my alarm went off. I set another and called Vincent. I told him I was not well and would try to be in in the afternoon. I think I sounded like such shit, he told me not to worry about it, and he would see me on Tuesday. I flopped back down on the bed and drifted in and out for the next few hours. I got up late in the morning and opened my laptop. There was an email from Jason.
Mark -
I will be there. I have a reservation at the hotel where I stayed during the last week.
J
Well, this would be interesting.
Jason -
I'll see you then.
Mark
The following two months were a time dilation for me. Time dragged. But August 14th rapidly approached.
We met outside his hotel and walked to the park across the street. This conversation was going to be heavy, but I couldn't be in private with him.
We sat on a bench, looking forward.
"I am so sorry about last summer. I knew I should have told you about Vivian, but she did not seem important until the end."
"And she was super important." I couldn't keep the venom out of my voice.
"Yes. I know. I am an asshole."
"Yep."
We just sat there for a while.
"I do not know how to say what I need to say," Jason began. "You are the only person I know who knows all of me.
"I do love Vivian. I do. But she does not know me fully." He paused. "And she never will. She would not understand. But before I ask her to marry me, I need to be with someone who sees all of me."
"Are you asking me to have sex with you?" I was shocked and pissed.
"No. No, no, no, no, no. That is not what I mean. I mean just to spend a few hours with someone who I can be myself -- my whole self -- with."
"OK."
"Can we spend the evening together?" I knew this time that the suggestion was a twisted linguistic joke, not him trying for anything.
"OK." I stood. While the city I lived in was small, it did have one gay bar. And I walked Jason there for a drink.
As much as I didn't want it, everything felt comfortable when we were together. After drinks, we headed to a gay-owned restaurant primarily full of men. Conversation came easily. Jason flourished. He seemed so happy. It was too soon when the final check came. Standing on the sidewalk outside of his hotel, I did not want the evening to end, but I knew I couldn't invite him to my apartment or ask to join him in his room.
"Thank you, Mark. This was exactly what I needed. Thank you for seeing me."
"What are you doing for the next two weeks?" I was not ready to say goodbye.
"I do not really have a plan. I have a reservation here for two more nights, then I was going to head toward my new apartment."
"Would you like to come to the cabin with me for a week?" The question was out of my lips before I realized it.
"Really?" his eyes were wide with disbelief.
Did I mean it? Yes, I did. I did want him to come with me. I did not know what it would mean, and I knew it would likely hurt, but I wanted it. I needed it. "Yes, Bunny."
"I would love that."
"We are going to have to have some serious conversations, but I think it will be good for both of us."
"You are sure?" He asked, voice tinged with hope.
"I'll pick you up after work."
The car ride was quiet. I was on autopilot as my doubts waged war on the hope I held for closure. Without thinking, I pulled into Sally's. She waggled her eyebrows at me for bringing the same guy for a second summer.
We fell back into the same rhythm we had before. I worked each morning as Jason read. (I needed to spend five days the first week working, so I worked Saturday and Sunday mornings so that Wednesday could be my last day.) We spent the afternoons lying in the sun and frolicking.
There were three main differences from the past summer. While there were many surreptitious -- and not so surreptitious -- glances, we maintained our distance. I had bought new mattresses for the guest room after last summer, so Jason had his own space. And we were always clothed. I mostly wore a pair of shorts and Jason dressed in a short tee-shirt and a pair of tighty whities. Even in the pond, we wore something.
After dinner Tuesday night, I lit a fire as Jason finished the dishes. I was watching the stars start to dot the darkening sky when I felt him come up behind me.
"Let's go swimming." He took my hand and led me to the water. He stripped off his shirt and underwear. Looking at me in the dim light of the fire, he said, almost plaintively, "Like last summer." I watched his pale golden form be engulfed by the dark waters as he walked out of the edge of the pool of light cast by the fire. Ensorcelled, I unbuttoned my shorts and let them drop at my feet. I waded out toward the honey dark hole in the star spotted waters. He took my hand, and we swam to my sitting rock. He sat beside me -- legs pressed together, his arm around my lower back, his head on my shoulder.
"Thank you, Mark."
We just sat there in the water -- cold silk caressing our freshly nude bodies.
"We have to talk about everything."
"I know. Tomorrow? Can we just be together tonight?"
I don't know how long we were there. We sat there until the fire had gone out. When we finally returned to the cabin, we both left our clothes out in the night. We toweled off, and with unspoken agreement, both went to my bed. Jason -- Bunny -- fell asleep immediately, curled against me again. And the slow rhythm of his breath calmed my mind.
We woke entwined. I wanted to kiss him, but knew that would be a bad idea. I had to work. I got up and made breakfast.
As we were just finishing breakfast, I said, "I have to work this morning. Let's go into town this afternoon and grab supplies. When we get home, we need to talk."
Jason nodded and grabbed the plates to clean up. He was still naked. I threw on some clothes while I worked, but Jason stayed naked.
After we got home and had unpacked the groceries, Jason stripped and turned to me. "Swim then talk?"
"Sure."
Shyly, he handed me the sunscreen. "Will you get my back?" I rubbed lotion in, stopping once again at the invisible boundary between back and ass. I turned as I coated my front and felt his cool hands caressing my back. He also respected the boundary, although his hands did wander a bit lower than mine had.
We swam for a bit. I got out and lay in the sun. Jason, delaying the inevitable, played in the water a bit more. But soon enough, he came and joined me. He lay down perpendicular to me, his head resting on my stomach. Without thought, my hand came up, and I started to play with his hair. I said nothing. This was his to tell. And it had to happen on his schedule.
After a few minutes, Jason began, "In my email, I told you I was going to ask Vivian to marry me. This was not my plan. I do love Vivian. And I will be happy to marry her, I think. But I did not want to marry her yet.
"But this summer, it was all my parents would talk about. Me getting married. Soon. Married before my grandmother dies. Would I not be happier if I got married?
"Vivian is a senior in college this year. I convinced them it would be best to ask her this winter. My mother was so happy. I do not think I had ever seen my father look so proud. I need to do this for them.
"But..." his word just hung there.
"But I am happy here too. I think I could love you too." I could feel him start to cry. I shifted to sitting behind him, his back pressed against my chest. I wrapped my arms around him.
I had no words for his pain, his confusion. I did not understand, but I did. I understood obligation. I understood conflict within. I understood wanting everything but seeing no road to get there. We just sat together.
"Ok, Bunny."
We sat there as the sun went down. It was late, but neither of us was willing to move. Finally, the cold blanket of night had settled over us.
"Do you want dinner?" I asked.
He chuckled. "No. I think I want to go to bed." He stood and turned to me, reaching out a hand. "Will you join me?"
There was no question about a mistaken double meaning here. He was asking me to take a big step. I reached out and took his hand. He led me to the bedroom and pulled me down on top of him.
"Are you sure, Bunny?"
He grabbed my head and pulled me into a hungry kiss. "I have never been more sure of anything in my life." He wrapped his legs around me and shifted so my erection was sliding along his crack. "I need you in me."
"It might hurt."
"You would never hurt me." I pulled away, kissing down his body. I kissed the head of his cock. I want to do more, but knowing we had broken the dam, there would be other opportunities. Soon, my face arrived between his cheeks, and my tongue found his hole. Jason gasped and squirmed as I licked him.
When I pulled away to grab lube from my backpack, I got to see him sprawled on the bed. His cock, impossibly hard, reaching for the ceiling. His eyes, brimming with lust, trained on me, staring at my hard cock, stiff in front of me. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
I lay beside him and kissed him. I dripped lube onto his hole and slowly started to play with his ring, teasing him. Now that we had started, I was in no rush to finish. I pushed the tip of my finger in, and he moaned into my mouth. It was a deep and guttural satisfaction. His hole was impossibly tight. But Jason was a willing and eager student. Between lube, my fingers, and his desire, he was eventually ready to take my cock.
He lay before me on his back, legs up and hole exposed. My cock was lubed. He had never been with another person, and I knew I was negative. So there was no need for a barrier between us. I rested my cock head against his rear opening. His hole was gasping and fluttering after the stretching it had received.
I pushed forward gently, watching him open for me; my pink helmet sinking through his wrinkled tan folds. He gasped. I waited. He wrapped his legs around my waist and pulled me in fully. He screamed at the intrusion. But mixed with the pain was need and conquest. While he might have felt pain, I had not hurt him.
We were linked; his legs pulled me into him. My pelvis was pressed against him, but he wanted, needed more. I leaned down and kissed him.
"Relax, Bunny," I said as I stroked my hands down his smooth thighs. "Let me take you." With that, Jason did relax, and I could withdraw. I started a slow fucking motion, in and out. While I kept the pace slow, each stroke was the full length of my cock.
The first time I hit his prostate, he jerked, arching and sinking me fully in his warm depths. "Wha," he squawked.
"Enjoy that, Bunny?"
He could not respond in words, only a moan as I pulled back and poked his prostate again.
It was too soon when I lost control and, with a final thrust, shot my load deep within him. With a touch of my hand, Jason also tipped over the edge. We shared the vibrations of our orgasms as we came down from our highs.
I leaned down and kissed him, both of us covered in his cum.
Once we had caught our breath, we got up and showered. While I was washing him, he asked about dinner. I pulled a pizza out of the freezer, and when it was ready, we sat on the pouch, legs tangled together for our late-night snack.
While Jason was supposed to move into his apartment on Monday the 25th, he emailed his landlord and said he would not be there until Friday. We spent the next week and a half at the cabin, being together -- and having sex everywhere and in every position imaginable. We discovered a lot. Jason, while a capable top, preferred to get fucked. He was a natural at deepthroating. And we both liked sex in the water. I think my favorite moment was fucking him doggy style on top of our hill, looking over my domain.
Friday morning, after a morning fuck, we loaded into my car, and I drove Jason the seven hours to his new apartment. I helped him unpack and set up. We went out for dinner and to grab a drink. When we got back to his new place, we were both exhausted. We stripped and got into bed together. We kissed but, by mutual, unspoken agreement, decided that sex was something special to the cabin.
The next spring, I received an email again.
M -
Vivian said yes. We are going to get married in June of next year.
I was hoping that I would still be invited to go fishing at your cabin this summer in August.
-B
I shot back a quick email inviting him and confirming the dates. It was unorthodox, but it seemed like it was something that could work. We had a wonderful week together that third summer, picking up right where we left off the summer before.
I did not know if things would change after they married, but in March, I received two pieces of correspondence. First, I received a wedding invitation. Second, I received an email from Jason asking about our fishing trip. I responded to the wedding invitation with my regrets, and I responded to the email with an invitation of my own. That summer, he explained that he did not want to invite me, but Vivian had insisted.
Also that summer, the Friday night we arrived, as I handed Jason his Oban, we both noticed his wedding ring, a gold band locked around his finger. The only thing on his body. He immediately took it off and put it in his suitcase. I noticed him playing with the space where his ring usually sat. I didn't believe he was thinking of his wife, but he had become used to the band about his finger.
That winter, I found a small piece of oak and got out my Grandpops' whittling knife. I knew Jason's hand was about my size, but his fingers were slightly slimmer. I carefully whittled a wooden ring with two bunny ears lying flat across the top.
The following summer, he had taken his ring off before I picked him up at the airport. When we arrived, I nervously handed him the ring. "Would this make you feel better for the week?" Tears welled up as he slipped it onto his finger. It was a bit too big. I surreptitiously found his wedding band and traced it, so I could carve something that fit him better. Jason cried as he took my ring off at the end of our week and placed it on the bedside table. His bedside table.
The next summer, as soon as we got out of the car on Friday night, Jason got down on one knee. He pulled out a box and, with a wooden ring, asked me to marry him for the week. I smiled and kissed him. He went to grab the ring where he had left it, but it wasn't there. He looked at me with panic in his eyes. Laughing, I pulled a small ring box out of my pocket.
There were two rings inside it. "I carved a new one that will fit better." I took the first ring and threaded it onto a chain. "May I wear this?" Jason smiled with tears in his eyes and nodded.
We stripped and headed to the shores of the pond to exchange our vows. It was simple, impromptu, but there was true meaning behind our exchanged `I do's. At the end of the week, I pounded two nails in the wood next to the door frame. I placed my ring on one, assuming that he would place his on the other. Instead, he placed his on the same nail as mine. The next time I was at the cabin, I pulled out the second nail, leaving our rings to be the only part of us together until the following summer.
While a small part of me doesn't like that Jason comes to me to cheat on his wife, I can accept that that is between them. He has never told her, but she must know something. But late each winter, I get an email about scheduling our fishing trip.
Over the past fifteen years, I have had some boyfriends. With Jason's blessing, I told them all about our relationship. Most of them were understanding, although it did cause two breakups. One could not understand why he could not join us. And the other said it was him or Jason. There was no question. It was Jason.
Oddly, as important as the cabin is to me, I never brought any of them up to see it. In the past few years, I realized why. For most of my life, the cabin was Grandpops' cabin. Eventually, I began to see it as my cabin. But now, I thought of it as our cabin. It was as much Jason's as it was mine.
I quietly placed the two glasses of Oban I had on the table behind him. Jason turned his head from the fire to look at me. I wrapped my arms around him from behind, my left hand over his, our rings together, the ring I still wore around my neck pressing into his back. Jason craned his head back, and our lips met. It was Saturday night, the last night of our marriage. We would soon go in and enjoy the carnal pleasures of wedded life. But for now, I just held my husband, looking at the sun setting over our mountain.
He rested his head back against my shoulder. "I love you."
"I love you, Bunny."