This story is a continuation of Matt Smith's (matterotica@hotmail.co.uk) fantastic story, 'Jack Hamilton Is Not A Nice Person'. I had often wondered what transpired directly after Jack storms away in the park. This was initially going to be a one-off, but while writing, I have decided to continue the tale that was left untold between Chapter 19, and the '6 Months Later' epilogue we see in Chapter 20. So, for those of you who have wondered what happened in the 6 months after Jack cut his puppet strings...here it is!
I would like to thank Matt Smith for creating the characters in the first place; and for his invaluable advice, input and suggestions which made this sequel possible. Especially discussing his characters' motivations and psychology with me. Please read his story first if you haven't already!
https://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/authoritarian/jack-hamilton/
An additional special thanks goes out to Jasper Cooper (jax.cooper@yahoo.com) for his input, especially having to do with the kinkier stuff. (It'll come, I promise!) You can read his amazing story 'The Downfall of Nate Ramsey', the inspiration for Jack Hamilton!, here:
https://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/authoritarian/downfall-of-nate-ramsey/
Please consider donating to Nifty!
~~THIS CHAPTER IS DEDICATED TO THE UKRANIANS WHO ARE BRAVELY FIGHTING FOR THEIR COUNTRY~~
CHAPTER 11
"Political forces ran. Political winds of discontent, and the modern age emerged triumphantly. But now that safety's gone, and it's time to de-evolve, and relive the dark chapters of history
Tell me what we're fighting for?? No progress ever came from war, only a false sense of increase. And the world won't wait for the truth upon a plate, but we're ready now to feast on an atheist peace." (Bad Religion 'Atheist Peace')
Exactly sixty days after tricking Jack into being his slave....Elliott stood up in his seat, cleared his throat, and said:
"Fuck you, Mr. Turner. You....your mother's a w..w..whore."
His entire body was shaking. Salty sweat beads trickled down his clammy pallid face. Never in his sixteen years had he done something this fightful or humiliating. Following a few shocked gasps, the entire class, including Mr. Turner himself, stood there in shocked silence. The ticking of the clock seemed to stop in Elliott's mind. All he could hear, all he knew, was his own pounding heartbeat. While only a few short seconds ticked by, this moment lasted a lifetime for Elliott. It had no beginning. It had no end. It just WAS.
Finally, the silence broke.
"Elliott.....how....could you say...."
Before Mr. Turner could finish, however, Elliott bolted out the door. As he ran up the East Wing of Holmepoint High, something snapped. Rage swelled up inside him, and he was power-walking on auto pilot. For the past month, he was forced by Tyler and his goons to debase and humiliate himself in ways he never conceived of before. Things that went way too far, and that he would NEVER have subjected Jack to. For all the sins he committed against his former best friend, and for all the times he, Ben and the others raped and humilated him....Elliott's own ordeal was a bridge too far. There are things worse than death, and Elliott's guilty shame was one of them. He even had no problem being subjected to everything that he in-turn helped inflict on Jack, and even a bit more. Enough was enough though. Elliott knew that his life was over, and if not literally than certainly effectively. To make it even worse, everything he did to Jack was useless. The older jock had played them from the very start! Bryce was right. All Elliott and the others had done to him was helped him get his rocks off, fulfilled obvious fantasies and fetishes (Which is why the asshole cooperated for as long as he did!), and helped put an extra $600 or so bucks into Jack's pocket by making him work at the club. They let him keep every dime of it! Never once asking Jack to turn over a cent. Oh, it was talked about, but he and Bryce calmly let the others know that forcing Jack to turn over what he earned would be akin to sexual slavery and therefore highly illegal. That irony was not lost on Elliott now that he understood everything they did to Jack was illegal. Yes, Jack offered to give Aarron his money, in what Elliott now saw as a half-hearted bullshit gesture, and it was true that he did pay for the beer when they attempted a normal hangout. Other than that, though....the thought never even crossed Jack's mind to give Elliott anything! If Jack was a true friend, he would have accepted his apology and shared his money with him. The fucker is rich anyway! And he certainly would not do THIS to him!
Elliott was not thinking straight. All he saw at this moment was red hot anger. He was going to beat the living piss out of Jack and Tyler, leave school, and find a way to end his own life. Tears of rage flowed down his face as he walked past the gym, over to the West Wing, where the science classes were. Tyler was in physics class, and he was Elliott's first stop. He barged inside.
The class was in the middle of a lecture. Mr. Dalton was up at the blackboard, explaining General Relativity. Tyler was sitting in the back row, obviously not paying attention to a thing the teacher had to say.
"Hi." Mr. Dalton said to Elliott, looking confused. "May I help you?"
Elliott ignored him and before anyone could react, ran to the back of the classroom and hissed in Tyler's face so only he could hear. "We do this HERE and NOW where everyone can see and know, or you can step out in the hall. Your choice."
Tyler almost shit his pants. He never saw Elliott with that particular look in his eyes. He had never seen ANYone with quite that look as a matter of fact. He knew one thing, however. It was over. He pushed the little fucker way too far. Still, he tried to maintain some semblance of dominance.
"You are really in for it if you don't leave, Helliott. Seriously, get the fuck out of here! You......got something to say to me? Say it after school! I'll....even give you permission to say whatever you want. Deal?" he almost pleaded as he looked around the classroom at eyes that were all on him and Elliott.
Elliott smiled in a way that was almost maniacal. "NO deal! Step out in the Hall or I will beat the fuck out of you right now. Do you think I care anymore? Try me."
"Boys? Is there a problem?" Mr. Dalton asked.
"No." Tyler asked as he stood up. "This will only take a second. My, uh...friend has something important to tell me." Tyler was visibly shaking.
Mr. Dalton just shrugged as Elliott and Tyler stepped out in the hall, and resumed his lesson.
Once they were out in the hall, Elliott grabbed Tyler by the hair and SLAMMED his head back into the concrete wall. Hard. "KEY! GIVE ME THE FUCKING KEY! NOW!" he growled at Tyler.
"Fuck....you! Oh, you are DEAD!" Tyler cried as he reached into his pocket for his cell phone. "You are so dead!" Tyler was scared. He was not what anyone would call a physical person, and had never even been in a fight before in his life, let alone a beating. He came close a few times, but always managed to avoid it. He would make a show of it that he was going to call the police. In truth, he would call Davis to find out what to do about these turn of events and make it SOUND like he was speaking to a police officer. Davis would know that Elliott or one of the others was in earshot and would understand. He never got the chance though. Elliott grabbed Tyler's iPhone out of his sweaty hand and smashed it to the ground before stamping on it until it lay there broken in multiple pieces.
"No, not dead, you psychopath....." Elliott hissed. "Not YET. Soon. But first...."
And with that, Elliott's first move was to kick Tyler hard in the nuts. As the boy howled in pain, Elliott then punched him several times in the face, kneed him in the stomach, and repeatedly slammed him against the wall.
"Stop! PLEASE!" Tyler guggled through the blood that filled his mouth from the teeth that now laid next to the broken phone on the floor. "STOP! HELP! SOMEONE! HELP!" He cried out weakly. The walls were thick, though, and his pleas went unanswered.
Elliott didn't stop. For the next minute, he punched and kicked the helpless coward until he finally slammed him to the ground. As Tyler lay there unconscious, Elliott fished into his pockets and found his set of keys. Thankfully, the key to the cock cage was attached to the key ring. Right there in the hall, Elliott reached into his pants and took off the cock cage, which he chucked at a passed out Tyler.
Elliott couldn't catch his breath. Jack WAS going to be next, but he just couldn't bring himself to do that to him now that he got it out of his system. (Unbeknownst to Elliott, Jack was not in school today anyway, who, at this very moment, was sitting in the lounge at the club, spilling his guts out to a very shocked and upset Felix...telling him everything that happened to him.) Instead, Elliott slammed his OWN head against the wall, pounded it with both fists and screamed. What he just did, what he inflicted on Tyler, could never be taken back. Oh, consequences be damned. He didn't care about THAT part. What drove him insane, though, was the thought that he almost did the same thing to Jack as well. His mind was a violent sea of conflicting emotions, and what Tyler put him through, on Jack's orders, eventually reached the breaking point. Up until now, he tried to accept it as penance. Some kind of self preservation must have kicked in though. He lost control. Would Tyler now turn him in? Would he go to prison for what he did to Jack? He thought so. He hoped so. It's what should have happened anyway. It's what Jack SHOULD have done. He would have been within his rights. The revenge Jack opted for instead, though, was no different than the revenge he had inflicted on Jack for bullying Ben...a boy he hardly knew at the time! Was it really about Ben, though? As Elliott leaned headfirst against the wall, sobbing, he knew Ben was the excuse. Jack, admittedly, was a shitty friend all these years in a lot of ways. It even went beyond that, though. Elliott had fallen in love with Jack, and every gay slur, every homophobic remark about others, Elliott internalized as if Jack said it to HIM. That was the real source of taking it out on Jack. How wrong Elliott was about everything! Elliott now even wondered if the letter Jack showed him was REALLY from the past, or if it was more lies...something he wrote up that day to make Elliott feel even worse.
Elliott wondered about all of this as the paramedics arrived to tend to Tyler who was just regaining consciousness. He wondered about it all, even as two armed security guards grabbed him by the arms, cuffed his hands behind his back with zip-ties, and marched him to the principal's office.
............
On the other side of town, Jack sat in the lounge of the gay club he was very briefly forced to work at. He was sitting with Felix who had listened intently to Jack's entire ordeal. From the slavery and rape, to his decision to break free based on Elliott and the others almost causing Jack to perform sexual acts with his own family in this very club. He also talked about his new friends, and his transformation into gothdom. He spilled about the nasty trick that was played on him and Devin in the cemetery. During the forty five minute tale, Felix was getting noticeably angrier and angrier...shaking on the red couch they were both sitting on. 'Those little pieces of garbage!' he said to himself. He had grown to like Ben, who had frequented the club often up until the night Jack stormed away. Now he knew why. Also, Felix knew that Ben was under eighteen (anyone with eyes could see that!), but on Ben's first night here, there was a sad pleading look in his eyes, so Felix had a talk with the sleeze-bag owner who sighed and nodded. A week before Jack began working here, Ben had thanked and even hugged Felix for allowing him to come, despite his age.
"This place....it literally saved my life, Felix. Without it, I'd have nothing. I'm....not well liked at school, and....well, just...thank you."
Having Ben on the brain, and thinking back to Jack's first night, something struck Felix which - in retrospect - was a telltale sign. Jack was extremely nervous, but then again, so is everyone at first who begins these lines of work. Still, Felix privately wondered if this kind of thing was really for Jack. It's what happened the next morning that Felix should have picked up on. He was helping the owner open the club, when Ben ran in. Felix reminded him that they were not open for business yet, and Ben said:
"I know that. I'm not staying. I just wanted to ask you to keep an eye on Jack. Take care of him. Um....he probably isn't staying here for too long. He just uh, wants to prove something to himself. Figure a few days, maybe a week. Two, TOPS! Just...don't ask, because I can't say. Please, take care of him while he's here, though. If anything happens to him, I'd never forgive myself OR you!"
Felix shrugged it off at the time, but that cryptic request made so much sense now. Ben, and those other sociopaths tricked and strong-armed Jack into this. He took his empty glass and flung it across the room. It smashed into shards upon the stage. He was also pissed that they tricked HIM. It was one thing to look the other way when patrons were underage, that was bad enough! It was quite another to allow a minor (Jack was seventeen) to work here. Ben's actions could have gotten them all arrested, or at the very least, shut down for good.
"Jack....I....had NO idea! If I'd have known, I would never EVER.....I....I would have called the police the moment they stepped in here. Shit, you still need to! In fact, use MY phone! I'd be HONORED!" Felix said as he attempted to shove his phone into Jack's hand to prove his point.
Jack shook his head, and gently handed Felix back his phone. "Please, not you too, Felix. I've been over this with a teacher AND my brother. I don't want to bring everything up and relive it, okay? I fucked up first and dragging it all out in the open with make me feel like a bigger shit than I do now."
"Okay, but surely, you can't hold yourself RESPONSIBLE for what they did to you!?" Felix replied as he stood up off the couch to snatch another glass from the table which he promptly filled with rum and downed it in a single gulp. "Okay, maybe you were a bit of a dick in school. Fine. But, who isn't sometimes? Come ON! Stick up for yourself. That hardly justifies what they did!"
"I'm not SAYING it does! God don't you think I know that!? It's more complicated than that, though! They....in some fucked up way, thought they were doing me a favor."
Felix looked exacerbated. "Jack.....they blackmailed and RAPED you!"
Jack nodded. "At the end of the day, that's what it turned out to be. They didn't see it that way, though. For them, it was tricking and hazing. You know.....that one guy I told you about....Aaron? In the hospital, it dawned on him for what it was, and the last I spoke with him, I can tell he will never be the same again. Oh, I don't mean the physical injury I caused, although THAT is still up in the air, I mean....he changed. Really changed, Felix! For the worse! There was a sadness that was consuming him. He's even trying to find God now! The realization of rape ruined his life and he KNEW it. At first I thought it was, you know...from being in the hospital with an uncertain future. It's not, though. It's guilt. He called it for what it was in front of all the others that day, and THEY changed too. Their eyes were open,and they were....I wish I could describe it, you know? A deep sadness. Would it be right for me to condemn them to prison for doing something that ultimately they didn't understand the gravity of? I mean, their lives are already ruined."
"I still wanna beat the snot out of them if I ever see them come in here again." Felix replied, definitely. "They risked this fucking club too."
"NO!" Jack exclaimed as he stood up and faced Felix. "NOT a good idea! You have a good thing going here. The owner loves you. Do you really think they're worth you getting in trouble over?"
"Oh, please. Who are they going to tell? 'Hey, Mr. Officer. This guy attacked me. Why? I raped his friend."
"Even still!" Jack insisted. "My FATHER comes here, you know that now! I don't want ANY more attention on me. My father would probably end up killing them if he knew! Fuck...maybe I shouldn't have told you this. Look, just please don't tell anyone and don't do anything to them if you see them, okay!? This could very well be the beginning of World War 3. Those things tend to start from little steps that deluded people feel is justified, and before you know it, the entire WORLD is involved. I don't want that. I just want peace."
"Okay, okay...I promise." Felix said as he poured himself another shot. Look Jack, I just wanna say that I hope we can still be friends. I like you. You're always welcome here, once you turn eighteen for real."
"Next month, actually." Jack said.
"I just....I don't want this place, or....or myself...to be some kinda trigger for your assault. I heard sometimes with rape victims, that people, places, and things can be..."
"Let me assure you," Jack interrupted as he put his hand up. "Davis was concerned about the same thing. I PROMISE you that the things I was forced to do isn't haunting me at all. It's not what they DID, it's the guilt I feel from starting this. It's feeling like, if I wasn't an asshole to Ben and the rest of them, that THEIR lives wouldn't be in shambles now. I get I didn't deserve what happened to me, but what is really killing me, is knowing that my actions caused them to do the unthinkable. I guess.....I guess that's why I'm here. Why I needed to talk to you." Jack slumped back down on the sofa and stared at the stage he once performed on. In a strange way, he missed those days. Missed them hard."
Felix looked at Jack and tried to scrutinize his face. "Jack....." he said as he sat back down next to him. "Is there another reason, though?"
"What do you mean?"
"What I mean is....there's something else, isn't there? Maybe even the REAL reason why you're here?"
"No." Jack lied. "I just wanted to try and......:" he stopped in his tracks. He might as well tell Felix everything. "Alright look, I don't know who the fuck I am!"
"Because of Ben and those..."
"NO! It's my entire shit life! I never knew who the fuck I was! I'm a fraud! A changeling! I don't REALLY care about football! I never fucking DID! I wanted to make my father happy! I never cared about popularity, or being on top! Oh, I thought I did! I told myself every day that the way to happiness is to leave everyone else in my dust. So I did what my father told me. I did what my coach told me. I let them mold me. I wanted to make THEM happy! When I was told what a bullying piece of shit I was, then I did what Elliott told me I should be. I did what Ben, Bryce and Lincoln told me to be! I could have left them! I had text messages on my phone of Elliott "forcing" me to jack off in class. I could have audio or video bugged them at ANY time, put an end to their shit right then and there! Then I found amazing friends who I allowed to mold me into being gothic. I don't FEEL it, though. Walking around in those clothes, I....feel just as conspicuous as I did when I was dressed up in slutty clothes. I'm not blaming Devin or Theo...they're good guys, but it's the same FEELING. I can't.....I want to be myself! I don't think I have an identity though and never did."
"So....why didn't you?" Felix asked.
"Didn't what?"
"I'm trying to back up a second. You're throwing everything out at me at once. You said you were wondering why you let Ben and Elliott and the rest of those goons own you. Yeah, because I was wondering the same thing, in fact. In fact, why let a bunch of pissants threaten you in the first place?"
"Because I fucking believed them, Felix!" Jack yelled. He finally admitted it. To himself most of all.
"The blackmail? But you said earlier..."
"NO! I BELIEVED THEM WHEN THEY SAID I DESERVED IT!" Jack began to sob. Felix hugged him tightly, allowing him to let it out. Finally, once Jack collected himself, he pushed Felix away and continued. "They did have something against me...something that I could never break away from....my own guilt. Let me back up....at FIRST, I told myself during the first couple days that they could get me in trouble if I didn't play their games. That was a lie I told myself. I knew deep down it was B.S. As soon as it became TOO apparent, and I couldn't use that as an excuse anymore, I screenshotted all of Elliott's texts to myself and was going to bug them, and then return-blackmail them, because I thought they deserved to be scared the way they tried to scare me. I...even considered using them as MY slaves. But I never did that. I kept going along with them...telling myself that I wanted to give it 'another day.' 'another day' 'another day', and so on. But you know what was behind all of it? Why I let it continue for as long as I did? Guilt. Guilt that, yes, I was enjoying it...but beyond that, guilt that I deserved it. Until they pushed me too far."
"No one deserves that, Jack. Even if you enjoyed it, it was still wrong."
"I KNOW! I know....it's just, it's still my fault."
Felix sighed. He could understand where Jack was coming from. Jack treated Ben like garbage. It was hard for Felix to see that side of Jack. Still, Jack not only paid the price, he paid it with far too much interest. Suddenly, an idea hit Felix. He took out his phone and texted something to Jack.
"That's the information for a Dr. Stanton. He's a therapist. You should give him a call. I see him once a week for anxiety and depression. The man is FANTASTIC."
Jack looked pensive. "You...you think I need a shrink? I told you, what they did didn't traumatize me in the way you're thinking."
"No, I know. I think I understand what this is all about. Part of it is about you coming to grips with your own sexual identiy, but I think a larger part is identity in general. You have no idea who you are, Jack Hamilton. It doesn't sound like you ever did. You let people mold you, because you feel guilty saying no to them, or maybe you have low self esteem, or just don't trust yourself. I do know this. You have a really good heart. You're a good person."
"You....you really think so?"
"I know so! There's no shame in seeing a therapist. He can help you sort all this out, and you'll be happier for it, believe me. You have to ask yourself something, because I sense it's the main question that's been haunting you. Why DID you let them control you? You said the real reason was that you felt you deserved it, but I suspect that's another self delusion. You KNOW what they did was wrong. I think it's something more basic, Jack. You are probably bisexual. Maybe even gay. They forced things upon you that you discovered that you loved. Is it possible that you didn't end it, because you didn't WANT it to end? Also...for the first time, I bet you felt like you were part of a group. Sure, you tell me you were popular in high school, but the thing with popularity is, people pay attention to you from the bottom, don't they?"
Jack nodded. "Yeah."
"Exactly. From a distance. Look at celebrities. They are some of the loneliest people in the world. What happened though, not ONLY were you becoming sexually awakened, you were part of a group where YOU were getting taken care of. In a way, despite being humiliated and subjugated, you found comfort in being paid attention to in that way. Could that be what is making you feel guilty now? That you enjoyed all of it? And THAT is why you don't know who you are. Finding out you were living lies your entire life can't be easy. I can understand why you followed the same pattern with your gothic friends. As an aside, I really wanna see you dressed up like that! No, but in all seriousness, you ran back to the familiar. And for you, the familiar is blending into what others expect from you...or at least....what you THINK they expect from you. All of this is tied together."
Jack did not answer for a few moments. Felix was right. How blind was he that he didn't see it before.
"I need help," he finally admitted.
[Author's Note: For those who thought I was gone, I am so so sorry! I have been dealing with a lot of personal issues. After Christmas, I contracted covid and it was really bad. Once that resolved itself, I went through a horrible breakup and to be honest, I was a mess for months, and in no condition to do this story justice at all. I apologize for the delay. I also apologize for the brevity of this chapter, but I had to break up what I thought was going to all be chapter 11 into two parts, so I can give you guys content without waiting for too long. Again, I am really sorry. I am doing much better now though, and writing will continue again on schedule, with a new chapter being released every 2 to 3 weeks. Please accept my apologies. Also, the reason there is no THEN segment for CH 11 is because I wanted it to pick up EXACTLY where 10 left off. Being that it was a cliffhanger, I thought a THEN segment here would ruin the flow.]
If you have any questions, comments, suggestions, or opinions, please email me at riveracheron101@gmail.com