Hey guys, hope you have fun with this chapter. Sorry for the wait :'( well send me your emails PEACE
Chapter Fifteen: Is Anything Ever Real?
A few months had passed since the day of Ryan's expulsion, his goodbyes. A day where trust was no where to be found. Since that day, Brian hasn't been at his best. His mind had been racing thoughts of suicide, he thought there was no hope for himself. He was a jerk and there was no way he could ever look at himself the same way ever again.
For those very few months, he himself had changed in so many ways you could not even tell that he was once the star of the football team. Not only did he change in personality, he also changed in look. He wore dark clothing, used heavy make up, and isolated himself from his "posse."
He turned into what he everyone thought he would never be. He turned himself into his own "Ryan." He couldn't look at his all star self, it disgusted himself.
Not only was he having problems with himself, but his friends and family were also worried about him. He wasn't himself, he even let down the team several times by not showing up to the games. Luckily, though, the team was still good with or without the all star player.
His mom knew that something was up but she wasn't the kind of woman to get into anybody's business, even if it was her own son. But even though she didn't was to pull the secrets out, she hired a paid professional to dwell into Brian's most deepest, darkest secrets.
Speaking of the paid professional, right now the paid professional was interrogating him.
"Brian, I know this is hard for you but you must listen to me if you want to get better."
"What if I don't want to get better? You're just a stupid shrink. Why do I have to listen to someone else's advise when most of their clients just kill themselves anyways?"
The paid professional was in shock. She didn't know what to say to this boy to make him listen to her. It was like talking to a brick wall.
"What? Got nothing else to say?"
"Let's talk about something else, shall we? Let's talk about your arm, again."
"There's nothing to talk about. Like I told you last time, a cat scratched my arm. Why is that so hard for you to comprehend?"
"It's not hard, it's just that it's not quite believable."
"And why not? Cats scratch, it's what they do."
"Yes, I know. But there's a cat that scratches you in the same spot everyday? Now I know that's not true. Brian, I know that after this, you'll go home and start cutting yourself. That's a serious problem, if you don't stop now, your life may end soon. You don't want that now, do you?"
"Maybe I do, there's nothing left for me here, what I did to him wasn't right."
Brian paused a moment to catch his breath.
"I was jerk--no I was worst than that, I was heartless bastard that doesn't know how to accept that good things that he gave me."
"Him? This is the first that I ever heard about you talk about "him." Who is this person you are talking about? Was he your friend? Did you hurt him?"
Brian didn't answer. All he did was look down at the floor while his tears streamed across his face.
"I'm sorry, we don't have to talk about this if you don't want to. I was only trying to--"
"No, it's okay. He was my friend, he really was. But I don't know what happened to me. Everything around me changed. My thoughts, my feelings, everything. I wasn't me anymore."
"And this was all because of him? What did he do to you to make you become a different person?"
"That's the thing. He didn't do anything. All he did was be real. He wasn't fake like all the people around me, all they want is to be popular and nothing else. They're not my friends, I don't have any friends. He was my only friend and I threw it all away."
"What did you do, exactly?"
"Look, here's the thing. I know that you're really trying to help me and it's really hard when I'm being a complete ass. But I don't want to talk about this, it's too personal."
"Okay, well that's okay. You're session is already over. We'll talk about this again on our next meeting."
That was it. That was how Brian's day went for two weeks.
Brian returned home and popped in Ryan's CD. As he listened, images of Ryan and himself popped into his head. Tears started falling from his face once more. The more he listened to the CD, the more he drowned himself with his tears.
SWOOSH
Brian's bedroom door suddenly flew open and out came Jace.
"Brian, what's up dude? Back from that crazy dyke? Man I swear if that mom sent me to some dyke I would kill myself before I got in that room. Even thinking of being in a room with a freak would gross me out, you know? Like when that fag boy, um uh Ryan? Yeah that's his name! When he came around you man, I just wanted to kill him. He is such a fag! Why doesn't he just do everyone a favor and kill himself already. Sheesh, I know I would feel better. Wouldn't you, Brian?"
"..."
"Brian? Oh come on, Brian is that girl still bothering you?"
A secret break up with some girl was the best Brian could muster up so Jace would just shut up about his depression issues.
"Anyways, what I came here for was to tell you that I got tickets to Venice for spring break!"
"Woo hoo..."
"Come on, dude. This is perfect timing, you can forget about that stupid girl and come to Venice with me! I hear they're having this massive masquerade ball there."
"So? What's your point?"
"My point, is that there will be TONS of girls there! Don't you wanna get some before we graduate, dude?"
"If I say yes, will you get off my case?"
"Only if you say yes, bro."
"Fine! I'll go with you, just let me pack my--"
"Oh don't worry about packing, I already did that for you when you were with that dyke shrink. And don't worry, I already gave the liberty of telling your mom, she's happy you're getting out of the house."
Brian got out of his bed and walked to his stereo. He stared blankly at his stereo.
"Dude, are you okay? Do you need your meds?"
Brian shook his head and popped out the CD.
"Wait in the car, I need to do a few things before I leave."
"Fine, but don't take too long, our flight is in an hour."
Jace left Brian's room and went outside to his car. Brian stared back at the CD.
"Ryan, I don't know if I can do this...I can't cheat on you with another girl. It's just not right."
"It won't be cheating, Brian. I'm already dead," said a voice in Brian's head.
"Who's there?"
"Do you really need to ask that, Brian? Seriously, don't you remember?"
"Who is this? I'm not in the mood for tricks!"
"Why not? You tricked me in thinking we were friends, until you literally STABBED me in the back!"
"Ryan? Ryan, is that you? Is that really you? Where are you coming from?" Brian asked going paranoid.
"Yes, it's me, Brian. It's Ryan. Where am I, you ask? Well I'm in your head, forever haunting you of your mistakes."
"What are you trying to say? I killed you and now you're going to haunt me forever?"
"Is it working?"
"I won't believe this, I will not believe that I would kill the boy that I fell in love with."
"Love? Is that what closet cases say these days? You hurt me and later that day I killed myself."
"No! You're lying! You wouldn't kill yourself, you're not that kind of person. You're smarter than that!"
"Am I really? If I'm so smart than why was I so foolish in becoming your friend? When all you did was feed me lies?"
"I never lied to you!"
"Really? From what I remember, you said we were friends. Until you got me expelled, that is."
"That was an accident, I'm sorry."
"Well sorry isn't enough. I'm dead and now you're facing the consequences."
"Quit feeding me lies! GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!" Brian yelled clamping his ears.
"Fine then, if you don't want me anymore than just wake up!"
"What did you say?"
"Wake up!"
Brian shot up and awoke from a bed that he was unfamiliar with. He looked around, but he couldn't see much because it had already turned into night. Brian turned around and noticed a lamp, he pulled on the lamp light which revealed that he was in a hotel.
"Did I just sleep through the whole flight?"
Brian got out of bed and noticed a note on the floor which read:
Hey Brian, if you're reading this then I guess you finally woke up. On the dresser is your mask and costume for the night. And you probably already figured this out, but I kinda spiked your meds.
Jace
"I am going to kill that punk!" thought Brian.
Brian walked towards the dresser and found a gold mask and another note.
Hey Brian if you're wondering why you only found a mask, well that's because...well you're basically nude the whole party except for your mask. Have Fun
Jace
"Great, nude parties."
Brian stripped all the way down to nothing. He looked at himself and saw the cuts on his left arm. Brian grabbed his mask, strapped it around his head. Brian walked towards the door and as Brian opened the door he said, "Hope it won't just be girls."