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Written by: Nicky Smith Edited by: JD Kaster
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE: FEELING THE PRESSURE
TREY'S POV
"Now, hold on a minute," Reese said calmly to Andy.
"Did you not hear what I just said? THEY WERE KISSING!" Andy said, practically yelling the last three words.
"Yeah, I heard you the first time," Reese said, sounding a bit annoyed.
"Andy, please, just wait a minute," I said as I stood and moved slowly toward him. I was trying to calm him down cause he looked like he was about to explode.
"Stay away from me faggot!" he said with a look of pure disgust on his face. There was that word again. I couldn't help but think if I'd ever hear the end of it.
"You'd better watch your mouth before I watch it for you with my fist," Bear exploded as he stepped around the couch and stalked toward Andy.
"What are you gonna do with one arm?" Andy asked with a sneer. I almost laughed as he looked too sure of himself. I'm sure Bear would use his teeth if that's all he had to hurt someone that was a threat to me.
"I can do a lot with one arm, trust me," Bear snarled as he took a menacing step toward Andy. For his part, Andy looked sufficiently threatened.
"I can't believe you turned out to be a cocksucker," Andy said with spite. It kinda reminded me of Drake finding out about Bear. This guy sounded like he had a sorta hero worship thing going for Bear, just like Drake had.
"You're damned right that I'm a cocksucker," Bear said with slightly less of a snarl. He then turned to me and actually winked at me. I gaped at him for the audacity that led him to try and flirt with me in this situation.
"I'm not sharing a room with a fag," Andy groused with his arms crossed.
"Well, that's good then, 'cause I'm straight," Reese said, looking slightly pissed.
"I mean this suite. I'm not staying with him here," he said with cruel emphasis while pointing at me.
"What are you worried about? Do you think I'm gonna sneak into your room and try to take advantage of you?" I asked, and the look that crossed his face answered that question.
"What the fuck would he want with you when he has me?" Bear asked aggressively, and I almost smiled at his egotistical question.
"I don't know what goes through the minds of deviants like you and him. I just know I'm not sleeping this close to a fag," Andy said, and I rolled my eyes.
"You can rest your simple little narrow-minded brain, Andy, 'cause, trust me when I say that I'm not the least bit attracted to you," I said, and he actually had the nerve to look offended.
"Oh, please. I know I look good," he said with a cocky look on his face. I just rolled my eyes.
"Whatever you need to tell yourself," I said with a sneer before heading to my room. I heard Bear following after me. I dropped down on my bed as he closed the door.
"This sucks ass," I said before letting out a long sigh.
"At least we don't have to hide in here anymore," Bear said, and that was the least of my concerns.
"Bear, what if he tells people?" I asked as I stood. I started pacing back and forth.
"Like who, my teammates?" He asked, and the amused grin on his face was not appreciated.
"Bear, more than just your teammates go to this school," I said as I worked myself up. Bear stood and took hold of my hand.
"Trey, I don't care if he tells anyone," he said, and I automatically started to protest, but he silenced me with a brief kiss. After we separated, I looked into his eyes and saw not even a bit of worry that his secret could be about to be blown. I had been watching him lately, and his non-reaction to not being able to play football had me stumped. Now he didn't care if the entire school could find out about him.
"Bear, he could ruin your career if people found out about us," I said to which he just smiled.
"Trey, stop worrying. I'm not," he said as he caressed my cheek with his thumb. I wanted to argue some more, but whatever calm he was experiencing was starting to affect me as well.
"Okay," I said as I released a breath to try and relieve some tension. This night had been stressful, first with Kenji, and now with Andy. I think I just needed to get some rest.
"Good," he said as he saw in my eyes that I was trying to drop the whole thing. So what if Andy knew about us? I'd lived with a homophobic roommate before. At least this time I wasn't sleeping next to him.
"I'm so fed up with this shit," I said as I dropped down on my bed.
"Babe, it's gonna be okay," Bear said as he knelt in front of me and placed a hand on my knee.
"Sometimes, I wish I'd never told anybody that I'm gay," I said, and while I knew what that meant, sometimes being me was too much.
"If you hadn't told me that you were gay, we might not be together now," Bear said, and that was true. As I said, I knew what it meant if I'd never told anybody about me. Bear probably never would have realized that he didn't just love me, but he was in love with me.
"I love you, Bear. You know I do. But sometimes, it's so much," I said, my voice breaking at the end. I could feel the emotions crashing down on me, and I tried to hold myself together. I didn't wanna break down now.
"I know, Trey. I promise that I'll do my best to help you carry it. That's my job as the one who plans to spend my life with you," he said, his eyes full of emotion. I knew he meant every word he said. After all, he'd taken a bullet for me.
"I'm sorry I said that," I said as I grasped both sides of his face. He looked at me with an intense stare. "I don't regret telling you about me. That would mean I regret our being together, and I could never do that. I waited so long for you to notice me, and I could never go back to being without you," I said, and his crystal blues sparkled as he continued to regard me.
"I love you so much, Trey. I'm glad to hear that," he said before rising and capturing my lips with his own.
I laid back on my bed, and he followed me. We continued to kiss as he laid his weight down on me. He knew I liked feeling his weight, so he let me feel it. I knew he wouldn't end up crushing me, so I wasn't worried.
He tried to maneuver his left arm under me, but the sling was in the way. He didn't let that stop him though, as he kept trying. I was worried about hurting him though, so I wrestled my libido under control and put the kibosh on things.
"What?" He asked, near breathless as he looked at me. I could see his blue eyes were dilated, and I knew that that meant he was very horny.
"Your arm," I said, but he just rolled his eyes.
"I told you that it doesn't even hurt anymore. The sling is coming off in a few days anyway," he said before trying to resume what we'd started. I pushed him back again, though, and he let out a frustrated grunt.
"Then play will resume in a few days," I said, and another frustrated grunt escaped him before he collapsed onto his back on my bed. I couldn't help laughing at my horny beast. "I promise to make the wait worth it," I said next to his ear as I caressed his hairy face. I heard a deep growl rumble in his throat.
"You'd better be ready because I'm gonna get at you once this comes off," he said as he hovered over me.
"I promise I'll be prepared to be devoured by the great beast," I said in my sexiest voice. Another growl erupted from him and his crystal blues darkened briefly which symbolized that he was extremely horny.
"I'd better go while I can still think straight," he said before he got off my bed.
"Straight huh," I said as I laughed at his retreating back.
"Ha ha, very funny," he said without turning around.
"Love you," I said and he let out the sigh he usually did whenever I touched him. I call it his contented sigh.
"Love you too baby," he said before opening my door and closing it behind him on his way out. I laughed at my horny beast. On the one hand, it was amusing seeing how horny he'd gotten so quickly. On the other hand, I was touched that he chose to respect my wish to not do anything until I was sure I wouldn't hurt him.
I got up and stripped down to my underwear. I pulled on a pair of sweats and grabbed my laptop. I also grabbed a few books and prepared to do some work. I texted Miriam and told her to let me know when she was ready to talk. It took a bit before she responded with okay.
I got started with my work and tried to put out of my mind the events of the night. Kenji would be easy enough, but Andy was another issue entirely, as I'd have to see him in the morning. I cursed that bitch misfortune for sticking me with yet another person who hated gay people. Why couldn't she just leave me alone?
I returned to being busy. I wanted to check on Miriam but my work had me in a stranglehold. I had thought that I'd be used to the pace of work from last semester but I had forgotten that they'd told me that my workload was gonna become more difficult starting this semester.
There had been days when I wanted to give up, but then I'd remember that I never gave up. Bear wanted to help me, but I kept telling him I was fine. Mostly I worked so hard because it kept me from dealing with Andy, who never missed the chance to remind me that I was a "fag" and how he felt about that.
Drake surprised me when he offered to talk with him, but I decided that that was a bad idea. I didn't need Drake giving Andy any ideas even if unwittingly. He was hard enough to deal with without an instruction manual from Drake Franklin on how to be a douchebag.
One thing that made it slightly easier to deal with everything was that I wasn't alone. I could see that Reese was just as ragged. We commiserated with each other while trying to keep each other focused and motivated. I had made a decision last year that I'd try to refrain from any talk that would shake his will, and I guess he had come to the same conclusion, as he never got too morose or mentioned that he wanted to give up.
We had just finished class and were getting our things together. Reese looked like he was trying to muster up the strength to stand. I took pity on him and went to help him.
"Thanks," he said once he was on his feet before letting out a yawn. I tried to stop the yawn I felt coming but was unable to. They said that yawning was contagious after all.
"Are you okay?" I asked wondering if he need a hand getting back to our suite.
"I'm good. Thanks for asking," he said with a tired smile.
We got our bags and left the room, headed back to the suite. I wanted to crash so bad, but I also wanted to see Bear. Maybe a shower would recharge my batteries a bit.
We arrived at our dorm and after making a pitstop at our mailboxes, we headed on up to the suite. When I opened the door my eyes fell on Andy sitting in the chair facing us with Richie sitting on the sofa doing some work. When he saw me, a look of disgust crossed his face.
"Oh, it's you," he said, not sparing me his distaste at my presence.
"Yeah, it's me, Big Gay Trey," I said, matching his malice.
"I thought you'd be over to your cocksucker, I mean boyfriend's place," he said as he looked me over with a bitter look on his face.
"Andy, please. Knock it off already. We're tired of that bigoted shit," Richie said with annoyance in his voice as he scowled at Andy.
"Just because you two are comfortable with a cocksucker being this close to you doesn't mean that I have to be," he said as he stood.
"How many times do you need to hear that Trey doesn't want your ass?" Richie said, and I almost laughed. Andy just scoffed.
"Don't worry, Andy. I'll be gone in a few minutes so you won't have to be so scared of me," I said before heading to my room to get some clothes to change into.
"I ain't afraid of no faggot," Andy said, but I just rolled my eyes and continued to my room.
"Could've fooled me," I heard Reese say before I closed my door.
I tried to shake off his comments as I've heard most of them for years but I think my severe exhaustion had weakened my gay hate armor. I could feel the emotions threatening to bubble up beneath the surface. I was able to get myself under control just as the door to my room opened. It was Richie.
"You're not gonna let him run you out of here, are you?" Richie asked after closing the door. I appreciated him and the concerned look on his face.
"I need to get away from here for a while. I'm so exhausted that I can't shrug off his shitty comments like I normally would be able to," I said, and his concerned look deepened.
"Trey, maybe you should..." he started but stopped and looked at me, unsure if he should continue. I was pretty sure what he wanted to say. He had been trying to work up the courage to say it for a couple of weeks now. I hoped he never did as I was having a hard enough time trying to keep my resolve.
"I'll be okay. Besides, I was planning on going to see Bear today anyway. It's been almost a week since I've seen him," I said and made sure to smile to ease his worry.
"Okay, if you're sure," he said, but he still looked concerned. Thankfully, he left me to finish getting my change of clothes.
I headed to the bathroom, choosing to ignore Andy as he was still in the common room. I turned on the shower and chose to take a brief cold shower to wake myself up. It worked some so I turned on the hot water to finish my shower.
Once I was clean I looked myself over in the mirror, and even with the shower, I still looked exhausted. Bear would see it with one glance if I could see it. I tried to massage my face and while it looked funny while doing it, it seemed to work a little bit.
I finished drying off and put on my clothes. I had made sure to never let Andy see me without clothes on as I didn't want his narrow-mindedness to convince him that my not being fully dressed around him was me trying to do something to him. I didn't need the additional stress of trying to convince his dumbass that I didn't want him.
I left the bathroom and heard Andy scoff. Again, I ignored him as I headed back to my room to get my wallet, keys, and phone. I checked myself over in the mirror again and I looked okay. My head started to hurt but I ignored it. I need some Bear time and an untimely annoying headache wasn't gonna get in my way.
"Have fun with your boyfriend," Andy called as I headed for the door to leave our suite. He made sure to say "boyfriend" with all the disgust he could muster. I turned toward him and smiled a sinister smile.
"Thanks, I will. You know, he has his sling off now. He'd probably wanna have a chat with you if you want," I said, adding emphasis to "chat", and enjoyed his raised eyebrows. It was funny that he felt safe with Bear's arm in a sling. Like Bear needed more than one arm to kick his ass.
Reese must have been in his room, probably asleep, but I did hear Richie snicker as I turned to leave. He must have seen Andy's reaction to what I'd said too.
I left the suite, then the dorm, and headed to Bear's place. On the way, I regretted not grabbing a jacket as it had gotten colder since Reese and I had been out. I shook off the cold, though, and trudged on. Once I arrived, I ran into Flynn and Hoyt. They waved, and Hoyt had the nerve to wink at me. I flipped him the bird with a smile and he chuckled.
I headed up to Bear's room while trying to ignore the headache that didn't wanna bug off. I knocked on the door to his room and prepared to throw myself at him. After all, I had told him that play could resume once his sling was off so I planned to keep my promise. That hope was dashed though as when he opened the door, he was holding Prue.
"Hey, baby," he said as his face lit up at seeing me.
"Hey, big guy," I said, making sure I smiled.
"Come on in," he said as he stepped aside and opened the door wider. I stepped in and as he closed the door, I took note of yet another guest in his place, Alicia Lake.
"Hey, Trey," she said a bit sheepishly from her seat on the couch.
"Hey," I said, making sure my tone was neutral. I tried to hide how seeing her here with Bear made me feel. I hoped that I was successful but my exhaustion was interfering with my wall-building ability.
"Trey," Prue said as she stretched out her arms to me with the smile that she got from her father. It was the first time she'd reached out to me. Bear watched me, to see what I'd do. I couldn't turn down the innocent child.
"Hey, Prue," I said, and her face lit up just like her father's. I reached out and took her from Bear and the look on his face almost took my breath away. She leaned over and kissed my cheek, and I'm not gonna lie. It touched me. No matter how she'd been conceived, she was a part of the man I loved so I felt a pull toward her.
"Your face hot," she said in toddler speak, and I was surprised by her increased vocabulary before I paid attention to what she'd said.
"What?" Bear asked as he stepped up to us. He laid a hand on my forehead for a few moments before frowning. I noticed that he cut his eyes at Alicia.
"Come on, sweetie," Alicia said as she walked over. She took Prue from my arms and stood her on the floor. They then walked over to the couch, and Alicia helped Prue hop up onto the couch to sit.
"Are you feeling okay?" Bear asked as he led me toward his room.
"I'm fine," I said and tried to look alive.
"Come with me," he said as he dragged me over to the kitchen. He searched a drawer until he found a thermometer. I was shocked that he had it. It didn't seem like either he or Deacon would have such a thing.
"I'm fine," I said as I tried to brush him off. He just stared at me though, with an expectant look on his face. I wasn't gonna fall for it, though.
"Trey," he said in that insistent tone of his as he locked eyes with me. I know he intended to stare me into submission, but he was distracted by his daughter.
"Daddy, look," Prue said as she held up one of her stuffed animals. Bear's serious frown melted into a loving gaze aimed at his daughter.
"Who is that?" He asked in semi-baby talk, even though Prue was well beyond the age for baby talk. Watching his face light up when he regarded his daughter was a delight to see.
There was that residual... something in the back of my mind that felt jealous at Bear growing closer to his daughter. That jealousy grew, especially when he knelt in front of her and played with her while Alicia looked on at them. It was likely because I was so exhausted that I couldn't fight back against it like I usually did.
As I watched them, they looked like the perfect happy little family. Bear's dad would probably be happy with the scene in front of me. I had promised Bear that I wouldn't leave him again, and I meant it. After all, the man had taken a bullet for me. But, in my exhaustion-weakened state, I couldn't handle seeing Bear and Alicia playing together with their daughter.
"Bear, I'm gonna go," I said before turning and heading for the door.
"Wait," he said as he stood and handed Prue back her stuffed animal. He headed towards me with a frown etched onto his face.
"I'm fine. You have company. I'll come back later," I said as I placed my hand on the doorknob.
"You don't have to leave. I want you to stay," he said as he grasped my hand. I glanced over at Alicia, and she was watching us covertly.
"I'm gonna go. You stay here with your family," I said as I laid my hand against his cheek. He closed his eyes and let out a small sigh.
"You are my family too," he said, and I knew that. I just couldn't deal with Alicia at the moment, and I wasn't about to tell him to send his daughter away.
"I know," I said before pulling him down and giving him a brief kiss. I told him I'd see him later before leaving his suite.
I wanted to stay, especially since I'd promised him that we would pick up where we had left off the last time we'd seen each other once his sling was off. I couldn't deal with Alicia, though, and I hoped that he would forgive me. There was plenty of time for that, though.
I headed out of Bear's dorm and as I headed back to my dorm, I remembered what awaited me there. I thought of maybe going to see Miriam and was about to pull out my phone when I suddenly felt very tired. I sat on the nearby bench and tried to catch a second wind. That was the last thing I remember...
BEAR'S POV
I stood there looking at the door after Trey left. He just came over to stay for a few minutes and left. That was very weird. I looked over and saw Alicia looking at me with a curious look on her face. I know she had to be curious because I definitely was. I wanted to go and chase after him, but he was probably gone now. I was so worried about him, but he wouldn't let me in. I know he said he wouldn't shut me out, but I knew that it was only a matter of time before it became too much for him, and he tried to push me away to keep me from figuring him out.
"Are you okay?" Alicia asked as she got up and walked over to me. She started to touch my arm but seemed to think better of it. I was still wary of her touching me, and I never hesitated to remove any part of her that touched me. I guess she had figured that out and stopped trying.
"I'm fine. Trey was just acting weird," I said as I tried to figure out what was up with him. There was also the fact that he felt warm, like he had a fever, and it was so noticeable that even Prue could tell.
"Maybe he was just stopping in to see you on his way back to his dorm," Alicia said, and I didn't like that she's been able to tell what I was thinking.
"Yeah, maybe," I said and took a step back from her. She rolled her eyes and headed back over to Prue. I didn't care if I had offended her. Sometimes I could handle being near her, but other times I needed to keep my distance. There were times that I remembered that she had almost cost me my relationship with Trey, and intrusive thoughts crept in. It was in those moments that I distanced myself from her, wary of what I could do to her.
"Daddy, what wrong?" Prue asked, which pulled me from my thoughts. I looked down and saw her looking up at me. I smiled and picked her up. Her smile helped wash away bad thoughts about her mother.
"I'm fine, princess," I said, and the smile she gave me melted my heart. It still amazed me that she was mine and how happy she became from even the slightest interaction with me. I felt the same about her though, so maybe that shouldn't have amazed me.
"You two are so cute together," Alicia said before I saw the flash from her taking a pic of Prue and me with her phone. I would agree with her, but that would require me to agree with her, and I didn't wanna do that. My phone ringing stopped any response. I pulled my phone from my pocket and saw that it was Tyson.
"Tyson, what's up?" I said as I answered my phone.
"Do you know where Trey is now?" He asked, and that definitely piqued my curiosity.
"He stopped by here a few minutes ago. He's probably headed for his dorm," I said, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.
"Yeah, he's not at his dorm," Tyson said, and warning bells went off in my head.
"Where is he then?" I asked, and I could hear the cold chill in my voice. Alicia took Prue from me and carried her back over to the couch while looking at me warily.
"He's right here, passed out on a bench near our dorm," he said, and I was walking to get my jacket before I knew it.
"Stay right there. I'm on my way," I said before ending the call.
"What's wrong?" Alicia asked, looking concerned. I didn't believe her, though. We'd already been through her fake concern for Trey in high school.
"I'll be right back," I chose to say before heading out the door.
Once I reached the lobby, I left my dorm and took the path I usually used when going to Trey's new dorm. After a few minutes, I came upon Trey and Tyson. Trey was lying on the bench with his legs still on the ground. Tyson was sitting in the space unoccupied by Trey. At least, that's what it looked like before I reached them.
Once I reached them, I could see that Trey's head was lying on Tyson's leg. Seeing Trey's head so close to Tyson's crotch had me seeing red. Tyson must have seen how pissed I was at seeing Trey's head on his leg because he held up his hands in a defensive position.
"He did it himself, I swear. He fell over when I tried to wake him up," he said with a look that said he feared for his safety. I ignored the scene before me, though, and focused on Trey.
"Trey, baby, wake up," I said as I gently shook him. He only grunted, which let me know he was still alive, so I took that as a good sign.
"I think he has a fever. He feels hot," Tyson said, and I tried to ignore how he would know that.
"Come on, Trey. Wake up," I tried again, and again he just grunted. I decided just to carry him back to my room, so I picked him up off the bench. I had a brief worry that picking him up would hurt my arm, but I pushed the thought out of my head when I thought about him again. Fortunately, though, there wasn't a problem.
"What are you gonna do?" Tyson asked after I had Trey secured in my arms.
"I'm gonna take him back to my room and go from there," I said, and he nodded. I thanked him for calling me and headed back to my room.
I reached my dorm and walked through the lobby, drawing quite a bit of attention. Hoyt was there, and he walked up and asked me what was wrong with Trey. I told him that he was just exhausted and sleeping. I hoped that was all it was.
I carried Trey up to my room and knocked on the door with my foot as I couldn't reach the doorknob while holding Trey. Alicia opened the door and looked shocked to see me holding Trey.
"What happened?" She asked with concern in her voice and on her face. I still didn't trust it as she wasn't concerned about him when he was in a coma, and she got me drunk just so she could have her way with me.
"Tyson found him asleep on a bench," I said as I headed for my room.
"Stay there, sweetie," Alicia said to Prue before following me. I laid him on my bed and tried to wake him up again. I was starting to get worried because he should have woken up by now with all the jostling I'd done with him.
"Trey, baby, please wake up," I pleaded with him. Alicia reached for him, but I smacked her hand away.
"I'm trying to see if he has a fever," she said with an annoyed look on her face.
"And you're gonna do this with your hand?" I asked as I scowled at her. I didn't want her touching him.
"I've been through this with Prue enough to know," she said before ignoring me and touching his forehead. She waited for a few moments before standing up and leaving the room. I was glad as I tried to wake him up again. I wondered if I should call his parents before Alicia returned with a bowl and a towel. On closer inspection, the bowl had ice water in it.
"I got it," I told her as I took the towel from her. She let out a frustrated breath. I didn't care, though, as I didn't want her touching Trey more than necessary.
I dunked the towel in the bowl and got it sufficiently wet. I pulled it out and was about to put it on Trey's head when she took it from me. She dunked it back into the bowl and squeezed most of the water out when she pulled it out of the bowl. She then folded it before giving it back to me. I tried to hide the blush of embarrassment as I laid the towel on Trey's forehead.
Alicia asked me if I had any Tylenol, and I told her to check the cabinets in the kitchenette. She left and returned a few minutes later with the Tylenol, a bottle of water, and my thermometer. I mumbled a thank you to her for being so considerate. She just shrugged.
We waited for Trey to wake up. He did after an hour, but he was groggy. I managed to take his temperature, and it was 100.1. I gave him the Tylenol and got him to take some, and drink some water before he passed out again. As I watched over him, I wondered again if I should call his parents.
TREY'S POV
My head was killing me. It was throbbing, and I felt awful. I tried to rack my brain to see if I had been out partying and had gotten drunk because it felt like I had a hangover. I tried to sit up, but my head was spinning, so I laid back down.
"You might wanna stay put until you feel better," I heard in a voice that couldn't be talking to me. I looked over, though, and sure enough, it was her.
"What are you doing here?" I asked my archnemesis. I laughed in my head at that distinction I had for her.
"I'm here babysitting you," Alicia said with a mischievous smirk. I didn't like it.
"Where's Bear?" I asked, not feeling comfortable being alone with Alicia in my weakened state.
"He had some classes to attend. He almost skipped them, but I convinced him that I'd watch you," she said, and I plotted things to do to my big ape for being so gullible.
"He just left me here, alone with you?" I asked, and she scoffed.
"What do you think little ole me is gonna do to you?" She asked, and I returned her scoff.
"I don't put anything past "little ole you" after what you did to Bear," I said, and she rolled her eyes.
"I didn't do anything to Bear. We both got drunk and..." she said, but I had to shut her up because I couldn't listen to this lie again.
"Save it, Alicia. I'm not in the mood to listen to bullshit," I said, and almost laughed at the look on her face at what I'd said.
She started to say something, then thankfully choose to hold her tongue. I didn't feel like dealing with Alicia's delusions about that night. She stewed for quite a bit, glancing at me every now and then. I sat up against the headboard of Bear's bed and stared at her. I knew she couldn't stay silent for long so I waited to hear the next delusional thing that her mind concocted.
"I had a brother, you know," she said out of the blue.
"Huh?" I said because I couldn't have heard her right.
"He was four years younger than me," she said, and as I looked at her she had a far-off look in her eyes. I paid attention to her words and they were in the past tense. That must have meant that her brother was dead. That had me curious why she would bring up her dead brother out of the blue.
"I take it he's... not with us anymore," I said and she let go with a sad chuckle.
"You don't have to sugarcoat it. He died when I was 10," she said and that meant that he was 6.
"I'm sorry," I said, unsure why I was feeling sadness for her or even why she had brought him up.
"When my mother told me she was pregnant, I remember being mad. It's one of my first memories. When he was born, I remember that I hated him. That's because my parents had taken me out for what they called "my day". It was supposed to make up for all the time preparing for my brother's birth had taken up.
Anyway, we were at the mall and were supposed to go to the zoo and then get ice cream. I was so happy, but then "he" had to make mama go into labor before we got to go to the zoo. Twenty hours later, I had a brother. I hated him from the first moment I saw him. I remember one night when he was about six months old I actually prayed for God to take him back so I could have my parents to myself.
Then, one day about a week later, I was in his room watching mama change him and he looked up at me and smiled. I couldn't ignore the smile, but I still wasn't gonna like him. Later on though, when he started crawling, he crawled to me first. Then when he first started walking, he walked to me, and not to daddy, who was calling him.
Well, I fell in love with him. From then on, we stuck together. Whenever I did anything, he wanted to be a part of it, and for the most part, I let him. Things were good until he was six and he was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer. It acted fast, and after three months, he was gone.
My parents were devastated. I couldn't accept that he was gone. Then I remembered my prayer from when I was four, and, I knew it was my fault. I had prayed my brother away. It had taken six years to happen, but my prayer had been answered. I hated myself for praying for my brother to go away. I never told my parents about this, though.
I thought that things couldn't get worse, but as you know, you're never supposed to even think that. My grandma, who I loved very much, died of a heart attack six months later, and my grandpa died just a month later. They said he died of a broken heart, and I could imagine.
In less than a year, I lost my brother and both my grandparents. After that, I decided I wasn't gonna care about anything. I mean, after all, people died, and caring about them left you open to pain. I did well in that regard, until high school.
I remember walking into school with Veronica and that's when I saw him for the first time. He was walking with this short kid and a girl. I found out from listening to the gossip throughout the week that his name was Bear Davidson. I remember Veronica laughing at the name, but I thought it fit him, and made him even more attractive.
Well, I tried many times throughout Freshman year to talk to him but I couldn't work up the courage. One thing I did notice though was that wherever Bear Davidson went, his little friend went as well. I learned his friend's name was Trey Healey and I started to hate that name and the boy who owned it.
As high school continued, they always stayed together, even as Bear dated every halfway decent-looking girl with a pulse. I heard the rumors and saw the girls after their dates with him and they looked like they'd had a religious experience.
It made me want to go out with him even more. I even decided that I wanted him to be my first. I tried to get close to him, but he was always busy with either his dates or his friends, centermost was the boy that I hated. I couldn't really figure out why I hated him but I did.
The cause of that hatred presented itself though when I tried to go out with Bear during Junior year. Everybody knew that Bear Davidson and Trey Healey were best friends by this point, so the two of them having a falling out was noticeable.
I asked him out, but he was like a zombie when he told me that he wasn't up to it. He had stopped dating by this point, and it coincided with his falling out with his best friend, a guy. He was also a disaster on the football field, where he was previously a pro.
A nagging voice in the back of my mind told me to pay attention to this. I noticed it more when Bear and his friend made up and Bear went back to normal. He asked me out right afterward, though, so I ignored that voice. I shouldn't have ignored it though, as our date was horrible.
Your name came up more than it should have on a date when he should have been focused on me. Then, he took me home and kissed me on the cheek. I finally got to go out with Bear Davidson and not only had he mentioned his male best friend more than I thought he should have, but then, he just took me home and gave me a peck on the cheek. No after-dinner activities, no nothing. Just a peck on the cheek, and he was gone.
After that, I really started paying attention to the two of you and then I saw it. I didn't wanna believe it but I saw it. He was different around you. He had always been protective of you but now you could feel the possessiveness he had regarding you. It was at this time that I realized I hadn't heard of any girl saying that they had been out with him. This was bizarre as there was hardly a week that Bear Davidson hadn't been on a date.
I tried to reason with myself that I had to be crazy to think such a thing about the king of eleventh grade, hell, the king of high school. Then the day came when I received the text of doom from one of the cheerleaders on my squad. I can still remember the words. "Alicia, you won't believe what I just heard. Bear Davidson and Trey Healey are fucking each other! Bear Davidson is gay!!!!".
I was stunned, but I still expected it. I just didn't expect it to blow up as it did. I had always known that Drake didn't like you, but I couldn't see how you nor any of your friends didn't realize it.
Anyway, I finally had confirmation that you and Bear were together. That didn't mean I had to like it though, and I didn't. I still hated you, especially when Mr. Renner had the "bright idea" to put us together to lead the student council. Over time though, I started to not hate you so much, probably because I saw how much you and Bear liked each other up close.
I tried to stop liking him like that because I could see how much he cared about you. I really wanted to stop but then you ended up in the hospital. Bear was so broken up over what had happened to you that my heart went out to him. I wanted so much to make him feel better that I found myself stealing a case of beer from my dad's garage and going to get him.
I swear I only intended to take him out and get his mind off his suffering. I didn't even think he'd go at first until I mentioned the beer. Then, as he downed one beer after another, he poured out his heart about you. I saw the pain at not having you awake written all over him and I wanted to take that pain away, even if just for a moment. My drunken mind convinced me that sex was the key and I went with it.
I didn't even think he'd be able to get it up, what with him being drunk and gay, but he did and I was shocked at how big he was. I briefly reconsidered it but beer brain won out and I did it. It was amazing for me but even with him being erect I could tell his heart wasn't in it. I lied to myself, though, and told myself that he had wanted me at that moment, that maybe I had a chance.
Those hopes were dashed though when you woke up, and I saw he was just as devoted to you as before. I saw how much he worried about you because it was obvious that you were different when you came back to school. Who wouldn't be different though after being shot and in a coma for two months and living to tell the tale?
I also saw something else, though. I saw how much he hated me over that night. I knew he blamed me for it, but I tried my best to hide how much it hurt. I couldn't miss it though, the look of pure hatred in his eyes whenever he looked at me. If looks could kill, I'd be dead.
Anyway, I tried to avoid him as much as possible, which became harder when you came back to the council. Then came the horrible day when I realized that my period was late. I tried to ignore it for a few days but I couldn't as my body seemed hellbent on me not doing so. I took a pregnancy test and I was horrified to see that I was pregnant.
I took twenty more tests over the next three days just to be sure. I was scared that my mother would find them so started taking the tests at the pharmacy. I finally went to Planned Parenthood and got confirmation. I was 18 and pregnant and still in high school. I knew the father could only be Bear as I hadn't had sex with anybody since the past summer when I'd given away the virginity I'd saved for Bear.
I'm not gonna lie and say I wasn't happy that I was pregnant with Bear's baby. I mean, I was happy when I wasn't panicking about my future. I was only 18, had no job or means to support myself and a child, and was about to graduate high school and possibly be on my own.
I couldn't tell my parents. I for sure couldn't tell Bear. Then I had to hide pregnancy symptoms from my parents and classmates. I distanced myself from Veronica as I was scared she'd figure me out and tell you guys.
Well, my parents found out when I was looking for a dress for prom. My mother took me shopping and she noticed my weight gain. She pushed me and forced me to confess. I told her I was pregnant but I refused to tell her who my baby daddy was.
We graduated and I felt safe from everyone at school. Most everybody I knew, especially you all had gone to school away from home so that lessened the stress of Bear finding out. That stress was replaced though with my mother badgering me to tell her who the father was. I didn't though as I felt the secret was something special.
I had Prue and she was beautiful. She reminded me of my brother, but she most definitely reminded me of Bear with her blue eyes that were just like his. I tried to do it alone but as time went on, and I saw more of Bear in her as she grew, I felt I couldn't keep her from him anymore so I told him about her.
I know you'll never believe me, but I honestly never intended to try and break you two up. I thought you'd forgive him once he told you what happened. When you broke up though, I started thinking that maybe this was a sign. Maybe Bear and I were meant to be together and Prue was meant to be the catalyst to make that happen.
Then you two got back together and he refused to see Prue. I realized then how stupid I'd been to become so obsessed with this man who would never love me because he loved you. I also realized that I hated you so much because, in my heart, I knew that Bear had always loved you and that I never had a chance with him. The final nail in that coffin was that you were the one that had to bring him to finally see his daughter." Alicia finally finished, and I didn't know how to react.
When she mentioned her brother, I had no idea she was about to tell me such a tale. I went over everything she'd said and wondered what I should believe and what I should label as more Alicia Lake bullshitting.
The story of her brother and her grandparents dying so close to each other when she was still so young had to be true. I mean what kind of demented person would lie about so much tragedy in such a short time? It could also explain why she was so desperate to attach to the first person that made her feel again.
Hearing about high school from her perspective, and how she had observed things between Bear and me really hit home with me. It was yet another piece of the puzzle that was the two of us. Another indication that Bear had feelings for me for much longer than I had imagined.
It was the account of what had happened the night that Prue had been conceived, that I didn't know if I should trust. If I trust her then she had just gotten caught up in a moment with alcohol to help her get over her morals. Her words sounded true but I still didn't want to believe her because it was Alicia Lake. She was my archnemesis.
"I know you're over there trying to reason with yourself a way to forgive me after hearing my story. Don't. I still did what I did," she said, and I looked at her. She was looking at the wall with a blank look on her face.
"What makes you think that's what I was doing?" I asked, feeling disturbed that she could tell that just from looking at me. Only Bear was supposed to be able to read me that well.
"From what I know of watching you and what Bear told me. You forgave Todd, you forgave Drake. Now, you're trying to find a way to forgive me," she said, and dammit if she didn't have me pegged.
"I'll be honest with you, Alicia," I said after thinking for a few minutes. "I don't think I'll ever really forgive you. You are the mother of my man's child, though, so maybe I can co-exist with you," I finished. She was silent for a few moments before nodding and saying hmm.
"I need to go check on Prue. Are you okay to stay by yourself for a while?" She asked as she stood up. I guess we had reached the end of our tolerance for each other at the moment.
"I'm fine. I don't need a babysitter," I said, and she rolled her eyes.
"Make sure you tell your man that you shooed me away," she said before leaving Bear's bedroom, closing the door behind her. I heard the suite door close a few moments later.
I got up and went to the bathroom. It was then, I noticed that Bear had undressed me down to my underwear. I laughed at myself that I didn't know I'd been sitting there with Alicia all that time, in only my underwear. Thankfully, I never removed the covers.
Once I was done using the bathroom, I decided to take a shower. I texted Richie first and asked him to bring me a change of clothes. He told me that he had already talked to Bear and was glad I was feeling better. He said he'd be over shortly. After that, I hopped in the shower. The water felt good and helped wash away some of the fatigue.
I hopped out of the shower after a bit and dried off. I headed to Bear's room to find the robe that he never wore but was side-tracked by a knock at the door. I wrapped my towel around my waist and headed to open the door. It was Richie with my clothes. He handed them to me, and after a brief chat, he said he had to run. I thanked him, and he was on his way.
I went back to Bear's room and put on the clothes Richie had brought. I hadn't told him what to bring, but he had managed to put together a nice outfit from my clothes. I was looking myself over in the mirror in Bear's room when there was another knock at the door. I wondered if it was somebody for Bear but realized it was for me when I opened the door and saw Miriam on the other side.
"How are you, sweetie?" She asked as she pulled me into a hug. I guess Bear had called her too.
"Tired, but better than I was yesterday," I said and tried to ignore the look of pity on her face. I knew she wanted to lecture me but choose not to.
"I brought you some soup," she said as she stepped around me and into Bear's place. She headed for the kitchenette table and set the bag in her hand on it.
"Thanks, Mom," I said sarcastically. She flipped me the bird before opening the containers in the bag.
"This is some egg drop soup, and this is some vegetable soup. I didn't get chicken noodle as I hear from Liberty that you don't like anybody's chicken noodle soup but your mother's," she said, and I was surprised she'd been so thorough in researching my soup tastes.
"Thanks," I said as I sat down. I tasted the vegetable soup to see if it'd settle in my stomach, and things seemed promising. I ate some vegetable soup with saltines that Miriam had also brought. She started eating the salad she'd brought for herself once she was satisfied that I was eating.
"How are you doing?" I asked her, as I hadn't forgotten about Kenji.
"I'm good," she said. I saw the brief look of sadness that she tried to hide.
"Miriam, talk to me," I said, and she sighed deeply.
"I feel so betrayed," she said before sighing again.
"Tell me about it," I said and tried to push down the brief spike of anger I felt toward Kenji. My focus was on her, though, not him.
"I spent all that time trying to get through to him. To get him to see that you were still the same person you always were. I could never get through to him, though. Now I find out that he was gay all this time yet still hated you for being gay," she said, and again I had to fight that surge of anger.
"Yeah," I hissed before I could stop myself. Miriam looked up from her plate at me and frowned slightly.
"Do you really think what you said is true?" She asked, but I didn't wanna answer. I didn't wanna hate Kenji, so I tried not to think about that.
"I don't know," I said instead. Miriam looked at me like she was trying to read my mind. Whatever she saw upset her because a troubled look came over her face.
"He hated you for being gay because he was jealous that you were with Bear and not him," she said more than asked. I think she already knew the answer.
"Probably," I said as a way to give doubt to what we both knew was true. I didn't want to kill the image of Kenji she likely still held.
"I feel so stupid," she said, and that idea of not hating Kenji was getting harder to live up to.
"Miriam, listen to me. This was Kenji's own doing. He caused this. He knew we would accept him for who he was, yet he continued to not only hide the truth about himself but also hate me for being who I am. It's all on him," I said and hoped she listened. I saw her eyes water, but no tears fell.
"I love you, no matter what. I always will," Miriam said as she laid her hand on mine. I turned my hand over and grasped hers.
"Thank you," I said, feeling choked up. We smiled at each other before continuing our meal.
We chatted for a bit before she told me she had a class to get to. I thanked her for coming and for the food. She hugged me before she left, and I told her not to blame herself for Kenji. She promised she'd try not to before she left. I got the leftover soup put away and was just getting the garbage sorted when there was another knock on the door. I wondered if there were so many visitors when I wasn't there as I headed for the door. I opened the door to find Serena on the other side.
"Serena," I said in surprise.
"Hey, hun. I heard you were sick, so I brought soup," she said before holding up a bag with more soup. I snorted a laugh.
"Come on in," I said as I held the door open. Serena walked in and headed for the kitchenette table. She took the big container of chicken noodle soup out of the bag and set it on the table. I tried not to grimace.
"You do like chicken noodle soup, don't you?" She asked, looking a bit unsure. Maybe I had grimaced after all.
"Yeah, but Miriam was just here, and she brought me some soup," I lied. Well, I didn't lie about Miriam, just about liking chicken noodle soup.
"Oh, okay," she said, looking relieved.
"Thanks for dropping by," I told her, and she smiled. I wondered why she liked me so much. I mean, she knew about Drake's and my history, yet she had taken to me. It was weird.
"It's no problem," she said before sitting in the chair that Miriam had sat in.
We chatted for a bit with her asking me what I had planned for the holidays. I told her I didn't have any plans other than just to make it to the holidays. She laughed and told me how brave she thought I was for doing what I was doing. I didn't think it was as much brave as it was crazy and said so. She laughed again, and her laugh was infectious.
Serena said that Drake was supposed to meet her family over the holidays, but she was nervous about it. I found it strange that Drake had yet to meet her parents, but I held my tongue. We chatted for a few more minutes before she said she had to go. She stood and picked up her bag and her purse. As she folded the bag though, her purse tipped over, and all the contents poured out.
"Shit," she said as she scrambled to pick up her stuff, including some pill bottles. I helped her pick her stuff up, and she blushed once she had everything put away.
"Don't worry about it. Accidents happen," I said, and she chuckled nervously.
"Well, I'd better go," she said. She grabbed her bag and left after waving at me.
I wondered at her sudden nervousness. I'd never seen her like that before. I headed to the table and started to get the container of soup to put away when I looked down and saw something on the floor. On closer inspection, it was a pill bottle. I picked it up and saw Serena's name on it. I was headed for my phone in Bear's room when curiosity got the better of me. I read the bottle and saw a name that sounded like it was estrogen.
That was weird, as Serena was a young woman. I knew she was older than me, but she still had to be in her twenties. I couldn't see her going through early menopause, as that was a reason for a woman to take estrogen. Another reason though hit me like a thunderbolt. What if Serena was transgender?
to be continued....
Author's Note:
What a twist!!!
Hello all and welcome back for another chapter of The Chronicles of Trey. In this chapter, we see the aftermath of the ending of the cliffhanger ending of last chapter. It seems Trey can't escape homophobic roommates. Andy makes it clear in this chapter that he's not down with the gays. How will things with him go moving forward. Will he have a change of heart or will he continue being a thorn in Trey's side for the duration of his time in his current living situation?
Trey is starting to feel the weight of his undertaking even more then he already was. The pressure to keep up with his work schedule had led to exhaustion. As most people know, extreme exhaustion and stress can leave e person vulnerable to illness and that's exactly what befalls Trey. Thankfully, Bear comes to the rescue and is there for him, along with Alicia, surprisingly. Will Trey be able to continue his undertaking?
Speaking of Alicia, we finally get some backstory on her and learn of how she came to know of Bear. Can her story be believed? Is there any hope for her? Also, what will happen with Miriam and Kenji? Will they ever be able to be friends again?
Finally, the closer of the chapter. I'll admit that I'm anxious, yet nervous, to write the next chapter as it's a subject that I'm afraid to get wrong. I did a bit of research before deciding that I would go forward with telling this storyline. I hope I can do it justice.
Thank you all for sticking with me, especially over 2 years hiatus. As always, any feedback can be sent to thestoryguy9783@gmail.com. Finally, if you haven't yet, you an check out my second story called Jude's Arc in the beginnings section.
Take care and until next time... Nicky *************************************************************
Editor Note:
Well that was a twist to the ending with Serena. What do you all think, could she be trans and if so will Drake be okay with this after his big change.
Looks like we have a new Drake in the form of Andy the roommate. How long will it take to put him in his place or he has a change of heart (which I don't really see happening). We also got a little more back story for Alicia.
We have a bit of the fallout with Kenji. Gotta wonder if Trey and the others can forgive him if he changes or will he stay stubborn in the act.
Until the next chapter people.
JDK