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Written by: Nicky Smith Edited by: JD Kaster CHAPTER FIFTEEN: LIMBO
JUSTICE'S POV
I tried to listen to Sean as he told me to stay out of things between Trey and Bear until they worked things out or whatever happened between them, but I just couldn't. The more I thought about it, the more I just had to talk to Alicia. Actually, talk was a word I was using in my head to make sure I did just that because the talking I wanted to do to her wasn't very nice.
I got out of my car and looked around the neighborhood that I'd never seen before. It was still strange to me that even in our not that big town, there were still places that I'd never seen before. I could see Veronica's parent's house further down the street. It was bigger than Alicia's house.
"What do you want?" I heard and looked up to see Alicia standing on the stone porch in front of a mahogany door that was obviously there to make the place look grander than it was. It was failing at it's job.
"I came to see you," I said after recovering from her sudden appearance while I was distracted with her neighborhood.
"About what?" She asked sounding and looking very defensive with her arms crossed in front of her.
"You know what," I said as I walked up the stone walkway toward her. She took a step back and I'll admit that I kind of took a small thrill in the look on her face.
"I don't have time for this. Go away," she said before turning and walking back inside. I dashed up the steps and managed to grab ahold of the door before she got it closed.
"Nice try Alicia," I said as I tried to push the door open that she was pushing from her side.
"Leave now. I don't have time to deal with your bullshit," she said, and I had to try hard to keep my cool. I did summon some of that anger though and was able to push the door open. I walked through the door and pushed it back without fully closing it.
"Justice, get your ass out of my house now!" She almost shouted and yet again I had to struggle to keep my cool.
"You know, you're lucky I don't have your ass arrested for rape," I said in a bluff. In truth there really was no way to prove what happened was rape.
"I didn't rape anybody," she said but I could see that she was unsure which I took delight in. I hid this though like she was trying to hide her uncertainty.
"Oh yeah? Judging by what Trey told me of what Bear told him, and from what Bear told me himself, you got Bear drunk and had sex with him without his consent, that is rape," I said but she frowned and I could see what I'd said had an effect on her.
"Bear was drunk so he doesn't know all of what happened and Trey damn sure doesn't know what happened. Bear and I BOTH got drunk and had sex and it was wonderful and beautiful and natural and normal," she said in a rant that had me looking at her like she was crazy because she sounded insane.
"You are insane. What happened between you and Bear was not natural," I said which seemed to piss her off more.
"It was more natural than Bear thinking he's in love with a man," she said and for a third time I had to try and restrain myself. I really needed to start meditating again and stop hanging around Liberty so much because even though she was my twin sister, she was having a negative effect on my ability to remain calm and cool which was vital when you could do what I could do.
"You are delusion, but you are proving that your crazy ass was trying to get pregnant by Bear to trap him," I said, and she looked shocked. I wasn't gonna be fooled by her though.
"I was not. It was spontaneous," she said, but I just rolled my eyes.
"Do you think I'm stupid or something? Even you wouldn't be stupid enough to have sex with him without a condom unless you were trying to get knocked up," I said, but she maintained her pissed off defensiveness.
"Listen here bitch, I'll be damned if I let you force your way into my house and throw around lies and accusations about me. Now, leave before I call the police and tell them that you broke in here," she said, and I almost had a stroke trying to restrain myself from jumping her ass.
"Call them. I'll have a story of my own to tell," I said with a confident smirk. I was pleased when she seemed to buy my bluff.
"Just leave. My child is asleep upstairs," she said sounding more cordial. I couldn't let it go though.
"You mean your bastard?" I said and immediately regretted it, that is until she slapped me. I was surprised with the force of it, but just briefly.
"Bitch, watch your mouth," she said in a cold tone as she glared at me. That didn't deter me though, although it probably should have as I found myself slapping her right back.
"Put your hands on me again and I'll break them," I said as I stood over her while she lay on the floor holding her face and looking pissed/scared at me.
"Justice..." I heard from behind me. We both looked and saw Veronica standing in the open door.
"This bitch broke in here and attacked me. Call the police," Alicia said, and I almost slapped her again but then I remembered that she was kind of right.
"Justice?" Veronica said as she stood there waiting for me to confirm or deny what she was saying.
"She's not totally wrong, but she's still lying," I said before glaring back at Alicia.
"Is that so?" Veronica asked before closing the door behind her and walking over to Alicia and helping her up off the floor. I was trying to get a read on what she was thinking about what it looked like she'd walked in on, but she was doing an excellent job of being unreadable.
"Call the police on this bitch," Alicia said after getting to her feet. I did a good job of keeping my cool as I wanted to slap the taste out of her mouth again.
"I didn't break in here," I simply said.
"Yes, you did! You broke in here and attacked me. Veronica here will be a witness to what she walked in on," Alicia said and damn it all, she thought she had me from the brief smirk that appeared on her face when Veronica was looking at me for a second.
"She hit me first. I was defending myself," I said to Veronica just in case she was actually entertaining the idea of believing this psycho.
"I did not," Alicia lied.
"Then, what's with this red mark on her face?" Veronica asked as she pointed at my face. I didn't know she'd left a mark. I walked over to the first mirror I saw and sure enough my cheek was reddened. She must have hit me harder than I thought as a red mark shouldn't have shown up on my skin that easily as my skin tone was on the darker side.
"She called my daughter a bastard," Alicia said, and I felt guilty about that.
"And I'm sorry about that, but if you hit me again, you will live to regret it," I said but she just rolled her eyes.
"See, she apologized, sort of. Now you apologize for hitting her," Veronica said.
"You know what, no. I'm not apologizing. She should have left when I told her to," Alicia said, and right about then realized I should leave before Alicia made me do something to her.
"Alicia..." Veronica said sounding exasperated before pinching the bridge of her nose.
"Why are you even here Veronica? Trey's not here so I don't see the point," she said and that was a mistake.
"Excuse me?" Veronica said in that way that I knew meant she was pissed. I always felt sorry for her for having to straddle that line between Trey and Alicia.
"You heard me. Trey is obviously more important to you than I am. How else do you explain this being the first time I've seen you since summer of last year?" Alicia said and that was a relief at least. In the back of my mind, I was sure that Veronica knew about this baby and was keeping quiet about it.
"I was busy with school," Veronica said but Alicia just rolled her eyes.
"Is that a fact? Tell me Ms. Busy-with-School, how many times have you seen Trey and his entourage in the last year?" Alicia asked, and it pained me that I thought that was a good question because Veronica had hung out with us plenty, especially during this past summer.
"I..." Veronica tried but seemed at a lost for words.
"I thought so," Alicia said seeming satisfied that she had gotten her win in on Veronica. That win was gonna be short lived though if the look that appeared on Veronica's face was any indication.
"Wait a damned minute. I called and texted you plenty while I was at school, but you were in a hurry to end our calls or you never answered them. You were also conveniently gone whenever I came to visit you over Christmas break and this past summer. I see now why you didn't want me to see you. You didn't want your big secret out until you dropped it on Bear yourself," Veronica said.
"No, I didn't," Alicia said obviously now on the defensive.
"Yes, you did. You're here trying to make me feel guilty for not seeing you in all this time and you were the one avoiding me so that you could keep your one-sided love child a secret," Veronica said, and it was obvious she was pissed.
"Are you jealous?" Alicia asked with an annoying smirk.
"Of who?" Veronica asked with a scowl.
"Of me that's who. It's obvious that you're into me and that what all this anger you're directing at me is about. You're jealous that I have a child with Bear," Alicia shockingly let fall from her lips. I was stunned and so was Veronica if the incredulous look on her face was any indication.
"Are you serious?" Veronica asked after a minute of stunned silence.
"Of course," Alicia said while looking strangely proud of herself for some inane reason.
"First of all, just because I'm bisexual doesn't automatically mean I'm into you. Second, after being friends with you for the last 11 years there is no way that I could possibly find your crazy ass attractive," Veronica said, and I wanted to laugh but I thought it'd be in bad taste, so I barely restrained myself.
"Crazy?" Alicia asked stupidly.
"Yes, crazy. A big huge honking ball of crazy. A crazy that I can't excuse anymore," Veronica said and thank goodness. I mean, I'm all for having your own friends but when they are Alicia Lake type of friends, then I can't promote that.
"Fine then. You already made your choice anyway," Alicia said, and I couldn't help but shake my head at her.
"I came here to talk to you and ask you why you did it, but I can already see that that was a stupid thing to do. You are who you are, and I guess I'm just now seeing just how far you'd go to get Bear," Veronica said, but all Alicia did was roll her eyes. Veronica shook her head and sadly walked away. Once she was out of the door I turned back to Alicia.
"You're sad and pathetic and now you've lost the only friend you have," I said even thou I probably should have left with Veronica.
"That's what you think," she said trying to look confident.
"Have fun being a single mother because whatever you were planning for Bear will backfire. He is and has always been in love with Trey and even a baby you got him drunk to conceive won't change that," I said, and I hoped that I was right.
"Get out now!" She shouted and since I was fed up with her I did what she said. It was stupid to try talking to someone like her anyway. I had thought that working so closely with Trey would have changed things between them, and indeed it seemed like it had, but she was obviously just biding her time waiting for a chance at Bear.
I walked out of her house and I saw that Veronica was still there sitting in her car. I gave her a nod and she gave me one before driving away. I don't know if she was there waiting to see if I did anything to Alicia or not. I chose not to think on it as I got in my car and drove away from this obvious mistake.
TREY'S POV
November was in the air and people were already talking about Thanksgiving break. I wished I could think about that, but my mind was still consumed with Bear and his new "baby daddy" status that I couldn't think about anything else. I was starting to worry about my schoolwork. In a few dark moments I even considered just giving up so I could get kicked out of school and not have to see or deal with Bear anymore. I would never do it through because I wasn't a quitter, at least when it came to school.
One thought did keep coming to mind though and that was what I could have ended up doing with Hoyt and his friend's number that was still in my phone. Over the last few days since he'd given it to me, I'd thought about it and what it would be like. This was the first time I'd considered having sex with anybody that wasn't Bear and I wasn't sure how to feel about it.
One conclusion that I'd come to though was that I needed to talk to Bear again. After going over it in my head, I had a plan of attack this time. I doubted what I'd come to would survive an encounter with Bear, but it was worth a try. If it worked and I had the will to endure it, maybe things would get better.
I arrived at Bear's dorm and after faking a smile and greeting a few of his teammates, I headed up to his room. On the way to his room I tried to push out of my mind the fact that they all were concerned about Bear's mood lately. I had to remain detached to do what I had to do.
I took a deep breath and knocked on his door. After a minute he answered the door and just for a second, I almost broke and hugged him right there. The fact that Bear held so much power to affect me scared me sometimes but that was a problem to deal with at another time.
"Trey," he said sounding almost excited before seeming to remember what was going on between us.
"Can I come in?" I asked and felt a twinge of Déjà vu.
"Sure," he said quickly and held open the door for me to walk in.
After closing the door, he walked over to the couch but didn't take a seat. We were quiet for a couple of minutes and you could feel the awkward tension in the air. It was weird because we had never been this awkward around each other, even after we'd gotten together for the first time. I would have expected awkwardness there as we had been best friends beforehand and moving into a new stage to our relationship, but things were natural between us. This however was painfully awkward.
"Trey, I'm so sorry for what I did. Please believe me that I never wanted to do anything to hurt you. Please tell me what I have to do for us to get back on track," he finally said. I considered what he said before speaking.
"Are you sure you want to hear what I have to say?" I asked because I had a motive for doing so. I just hoped I could say it and hold up to it.
"I'll do anything," he said, and I truly believed he'd do anything which is what I was counting on.
"Good. I want you to have sex," I said deliberately being vague to gauge his reaction.
"Really? Don't you think it's too soon?' he asked looking shocked.
"No, I don't, and I didn't mean with me. I mean I want you to have sex with girls, females, whichever you want to call them," I said, and he just looked at me like I had lost my mind for a minute before he said anything.
"I'm not doing that," he said with finality, but this was the way things were gonna be. This is what I'd come to.
"Yes, you are. If you want things to go back to normal, you will do this" I said and again he looked at me like I was crazy.
"So, you want me to just go have sex with some random woman?" he asked bitterly.
"No, I want you to feel free to have sex with any girl you want to. If you meet a girl and want to screw her, go for it," I said, and I was starting to not recognize the tone I was using with him.
"And who will you be doing while I'm doing that?" he asked in that same bitter tone that I did not appreciate when I was there giving him what he obviously wanted. Hoyt and his friend briefly flashed in my head, but I quickly pushed them out.
"Nobody. See Bear, unlike you, I'm gay so I won't be sleeping with any women, but you go right ahead and have at it," I told him. I realized that we were fighting again. We just weren't doing so in raised voices but were doing so passive-aggressively.
"I'm not doing this and that's final," he said but he was wrong.
"I can't trust you anymore Bear. Whenever you're not with me, I'm gonna be thinking you're out there doing it anyway, so you might as well go ahead and just do it," I said, and his once crystal blue eyes developed an icy nature that cut through me, but I managed to hide that fact.
"You can't trust me? That's rich coming from you Trey," he said in a cold tone that hurt, but again I hid this fact.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked with a noticeable edge.
"It means Trey that I kept this one thing from you. Now let's count all the things you kept from me," he said maintaining that cold tone. I knew where this was going, and I knew then that this wasn't going to end well for either of us.
"Bear," I said in a warning tone which he ignored.
"You kept the fact that Sean wasn't inviting you to his parties a secret from me. You stopped being my friend for weeks, you went through this whole elaborate scheme to distance yourself from me because you couldn't tell me that you were gay, which is another thing that you kept a secret from me. You kept the fact that Drake and his boys had jumped you a secret from me. You kept the fact that Carter was gay a secret from me. You kept the fact that Todd had kissed you a secret from me."
"You kept the fact that Kent and his friends had already attacked you once a secret from me which, if you hadn't, probably would have prevented when he shot you and killed Clyde. This is of course after he had raped you which you also kept a secret from me. So yes, it's completely right that you shouldn't trust me for keeping one thing ever from you when you kept all that shit from me and yet I still trusted you," he said in a mouthful that I'd never thought he'd ever say to me. To throw my missteps back in my face to try to minimize his great error truly pissed me off.
"Fuck you Bear! You fucked Alicia fucking Lake and now were stuck with the fact that you're now her baby daddy! We're stuck with that bitch for the rest of our lives because you couldn't keep your dammed dick in your pants when I was in a fucking coma!" I shouted at him feeling like the last vestige of my will was being crushed.
"Yes, you were in a coma. For weeks I had to watch the person I loved most in the world lying unconscious in a hospital bed. Then I had to hear that there was a big chance that you would never wake up and that crushed me. I couldn't breathe thinking about living without you so when Alicia showed up at my house I went out with her. She gave me beer after beer after beer until I couldn't feel anything anymore, especially the soul crushing pain of the thought of living without you. Then I started thinking about us together and my body reacted, and Alicia took advantage of that and I was too drunk to care what was happening," he said with such emotion that it almost cut through my rage.
I wanted to hug him. I wanted to tell him I was sorry. I wanted to knee him in the balls and drive my fist into his gut. Most importantly though, I wanted Alicia Lake to not exist anymore. Since none of that was about to happen at that moment, I did the only thing I could do. I walked out on Bear and quickly put distance between us.
As the distance grew, all I could think about was the fact that he thought the crap that he'd thrown in my face equaled up to his infidelity and the fact that he had a kid now, with the person I now hated most in all the Universe. That may be why I found my phone in my hand and myself scrolling for a number that I had initially never intended on using.
I hesitated for a second before selecting his name and watched as "dialing" popped up on the screen. I waited for him to answer and when he did I took a second to enjoy his deep voice. I introduced myself to him and told him how I'd gotten his number and was briefly thrown off by the fact that Hoyt had already told him about me.
Instead of wondering just what he'd said about me I pushed forward and talked to him. I was enjoying his voice and before I knew it I asked him out. He didn't hesitate long before agreeing to meet me tomorrow night. I told him I'd see him then and ended the call. I was surprised that I had been talking to him for almost 30 minutes. I took that as a sign that at least we'd get along okay.
It was almost time to leave for my... date? It was weird thinking of it like that when it didn't involve Bear, but I guess I was going on a date. It felt weird doing this when things between me and Bear were far from settled, but maybe this is what I needed to get some perspective.
"Where are you going?" Drake asked after entering the room.
"Why do you care?" I asked with the same attitude he would have used on me not that long ago. I was still wondering what was up with him.
"I don't," he said but failed at being believable.
"Yeah right," I said before I finished getting dressed. He didn't say anything else, but he instead watched me which unnerved me. I did my best to ignore him and once I was finished I grabbed my wallet, keys, and cell phone off my bed and slid them into my pockets before leaving the room without anything else said between Drake and me.
I went outside to wait for my date to come and pick me up where I'd told him I'd be waiting. After waiting for about 10 minutes a silver and black Chevy truck pulled up and parked next to mine. I didn't think anything of it, even though I'd never seen it before, until the door opened, and a literal wet dream got out.
His name was Jamal. He was easily over six feet tall, I'd guess around 6'4. He was built. He had an awesome beard. He was literally everything that I found irresistible about Bear. The only difference was that Jamal was Black. Just looking at him cemented with me the fact that I did indeed have a type, and this was it.
After he closed the door to his truck he looked right at me and smiled, and I gulped. A part of me regretted calling him because of how attracted I was to him. That part grew as he walked toward me, and I could see the outline of what looked to be an impressive piece of man meat.
"Hi, I'm Jamal," he said as he extended his hand. I was in awe of him up close and I had to mentally slap the shit out of myself to respond.
"I'm Trey," I sort of mumbled.
"I know. Hoyt showed me a pic of you," he said, and it took a minute for what he'd said to register.
"He has a picture of me?" I asked dumbly. It again though made me wonder what Hoyt had said to him about me.
"Apparently so as he showed it to me," he said with a very alluring smile.
"Oh," I said as I couldn't think of anything else to say. I was kicking myself for how affected I was by this guy. It's not like I'd never seen anyone like him before. I'd been intensely in love with one for years. There was something about him though that had me feeling all types of ways.
"You wanna get going?" He asked, and the fact that he was so polite and the way he spoke reminded me of Carter. At first, I wondered if he would be jealous that I didn't consider him for whatever I was doing. Then I remembered that he was currently preoccupied with Sed.
"Yeah," I said after what I'm sure was too long. He just smiled though and turned back to his truck. He waited until I got in front of him and walked behind me. I almost laughed at myself once I realized that I was flexing my butt cheeks.
When we reached his truck, he walked around to my side and surprised me by opening my door. I wasn't sure how I felt about that but chose for the moment to be flattered he was being such a gentleman. He then hopped into the driver's side of the truck and we were off.
We drove to the little out of the way Italian restaurant in silence. I was surprised to see valet parking at the place because it didn't look that big but who was I to tell a restaurant they weren't big enough to be fancy. We got out and he handed the valet his keys and a tip like a pro before walking over to me and guiding me forward toward the entrance.
It occurred to me then that he came off like he was older than me and I wondered just how old he was. I mean, he didn't look like he was old, but he didn't behave like a 20-year-old either. Maybe I was just immature, and I needed to see this guy to see how 20-year-olds was supposed to carry themselves.
We entered the restaurant and after he spoke to the hostess, well, flirted with the hostess, we were seated quickly. I looked at him with raised eyebrows after she left but he just smiled a cocky smile.
The waiter showed up before we were able to start any conversation and he ordered for both of us. I wanted to be annoyed that he did that but what he ordered sounded pretty good, so I decided to just let it go and gave him a thankful smile, which seemed to please him. Still though, I was hit again with how mature he seemed and that lead to my mouth running off like I hated.
"How old are you?" I blurted out and felt immediately embarrassed.
"Uh, that was sudden," he said sounding a bit amused.
"I'm sorry. Forget I asked," I said as I sank down in my seat. He looked highly amused with my embarrassment.
"I'm 24," he said after a minute.
"Really," I said, now immediately over my embarrassment.
"Yeah, and I know what you're probably thinking. Hoyt's brother is my friend and when he came out to him, he kind of steered him in my direction so I could mentor him. Little did he know that his little brother wanted more than mentoring from me if you know what I mean," he said and waggled his eyebrows to get his point across.
"Oh," I said and slightly cringed at the single almost word. He just smiled though.
"Yeah, he was ready for a piece of me. I managed to cool him off though. I told him I wanted to be his friend and he begrudgingly accepted. Ever since then we've been pretty tight, other than the occasional drunken text from him telling me he wants to lick my body all over," he said, and I didn't have time to try and discern if that last part was a joke because I was busy picturing myself doing it to him. I shook the image from my head, but not soon enough to avoid having him pretty much figure out what I'd been thinking.
"So, uh, this place is nice," I said and hated the nervousness in my voice.
"You're cute," he said with that cocky grin again. I decided that I needed to turn the tables on him to get my bearings.
"No, I'm hot," I said with a wink and what I hoped was my own cocky grin.
"That you are," he said in a deeper tone and a now lusty smile. So much for the turning of the tables.
He asked me about myself and I gave him a cliff's notes version of my life sans all the drama. I told him a bit about Bear but left his name out of it. I think he caught on and seemed to understand. He likely already knew though from Hoyt, but I didn't ask and he didn't volunteer.
The food came eventually, and we ate and talked more over dinner. It came to me near the end of the meal how weird it was that I was out on a date with a guy who was not Bear and I was enjoying myself, maybe too much. I tried not to get too much in my head about this as I could be my own worst enemy and surprisingly, it worked.
We finished dinner and talked a few more minutes before the waiter came and cleared the table. He came back with the bill and Jamal took it and signed it and slipped a card into the little folder. The waiter returned a few minutes later and gave him his card and a receipt which left us free to leave.
We got up and headed for the entrance. As we passed the hostess station, she gave Jamal an extra bright smile. He returned a smile, though not as bright. When we got outside though he did aim a high wattage smile at me. When the valet brought his truck around we got in and for the first time I was unsure of what to do.
BEAR'S POV
I was restless. I couldn't sit still after my latest encounter with Trey. I hated so much that things were like they were. I regretted saying what I'd said to him even if it was mostly true. A relationship is not about throwing up your partner's past mistakes in their face when you've made a mistake and are facing the consequences of said mistake.
Deacon had tried to get me to tell him why I was so keyed up but after I growled at him he left me alone. I needed something to change because I was on edge. My mind was racing a hundred miles an hour and I couldn't get it to stop. This was probably what Trey had went through when he got into his overthinking moods and if so I really needed to do more to take his mind off of things, that is if we got past this and stay together.
The door opening startled me and when I turned around I saw that it was Deacon coming into the room. He had a weird look on his face and when I looked at him he tried to avoid my eyes. I felt guilty for my surly mood and made a move to apologize but him stepping back stopped me in my tracks.
"Look man, I know I was upset earlier and I apologize," I said but he continued to avoid my eyes.
"Yeah man, it's fine," he said sounding funny. He went to walk around me but I stopped him.
"What's up?" I asked as something told me that something else was up with him.
"Nothing," he said but his tone told me that he was lying.
"Spill," I said in a tone that left no question that I wanted to hear this.
"Well, I ran into Hoyt just now," he said and while that was usually wasn't important, something told me that this time it was.
"And," I said dragging it out in urging for him to continue.
"Look man, don't shoot the messenger but, he told me Trey is on a date with some dude," he said and it felt like a cannon had been shot into my gut. I felt a mixture of emotions, among which rage was becoming center focused.
"How does he know?" I asked through teeth gritted so tight that I'm surprised I didn't chip any of them.
"Well...," he dragged out before piping up.
"Well what?" I asked as I ignored the pain in my jaw from clenching so hard.
"He... said he set the two of `em up," he said as easily as he could to try and soften the blow.
"Okay," I said before heading for the door. I was gonna go kick Hoyt's ass then kick it some more to make him tell me where Trey was.
"No!" Deacon said as he stood in my way.
"Move, before I make you move," I said in a dangerous tone that would have moved almost anyone. I guess Deacon was either brave or stupid.
"I'm not letting you go do something you'll regret," he said and while it was logical, I didn't care much about that.
"Move!" I barked out in my deepest bass. I wondered if the whole floor heard it.
"No! If you're gonna go do something stupid you're gonna have to go through me," he said and the look his eyes said that he meant it. That took the wind out of my sails long enough to get me back to my senses.
"Sorry," I mumbled after a minute.
"It's fine," he said after releasing a long breath of relief. I walked over to the couch and dropped down on it. After he was sure I wasn't gonna go after Hoyt, Deacon left the door and sat down in the chair next to the couch.
I closed my eyes and tried to keep any images of Trey and whoever he might be out with from popping into my mind. I tried not to think about the fact that I had pushed the guy I loved away and into someone else's arms. We probably could have eventually worked things out if I hadn't thrown that stuff back in his face.
One particular thing I'd said came back to me. I'd basically blamed him for his own rape. That must have been the final straw. Him going out on a date already though made me wonder just how serious we were. I mean, it'd been a couple of weeks since we'd been apart but for him to go out on a date just a day after we'd gotten into a fight had to mean something.
"Where are you going?" Deacon asked and I found that weird until I realized that I had stood up and walked toward the door without even knowing.
"Uh, out," I said unsure of what to say as I didn't know where I was going.
"Dude, just don't go messing with Hoyt now. Believe it or not it's not his fault this happened," Deacon said and while I knew he didn't outright say that it was my fault, I felt he was implying it. I didn't argue though as I agreed.
"I won't," I said although I wasn't sure if I would or wouldn't try and track him down.
I left my room and the dorm in a haze. At different times I was conscious of walking around, of standing in front of Trey's dorm, of more walking, of driving somewhere. When I fully regained consciousness of reality I saw that I was parked out in front of Alicia's house. I guess somehow I knew I needed to see her again.
I got out of my car and walked to her door. I found as I got closer to the door though, the angrier I was getting to the point that when I made it to the door, I found myself pounding on the door instead of ringing the bell.
"Dammit Bear, would you keep it down. Prue is asleep," Alicia said as she swung open the door. I didn't wait for an invitation. I just pushed my way into her house.
"I guess you're happy now," I said even though she had no idea what I meant.
"Happy about what?" She asked looking annoyed as she closed the door. I noticed that she was in her pajamas and subconsciously took a few more steps away from her. She noticed and rolled her eyes.
"Trey's on a date," I seethed.
"How is that my fault?" She asked defensively.
"You know exactly how it's your fault," I shouted and she glared as she walked past me toward the stairs.
"I told you to keep your damned voice down," she hissed.
"Sorry," I mumbled for some reason. Then I remembered I was pissed at her and my anger returned to full flare.
"While you're over here blaming me for something that you willingly participated in, ask yourself why Trey is out with another guy so fast if he loved you so much," she said and that took the air out of my anger.
"He..." was all I was able to say. I staggered to the nearest seat and dropped down on it and just stared at nothing in particular.
What Alicia had said made sense, but I just couldn't think like that. I knew what I felt for Trey was real. I had wanted it so bad and I had at some point realized that I'd slept with so many girls because I was looking for what Trey had given me. I was content when I was with him, and while I'd had some pretty hot sex with girls, I'd never experienced that feeling on contentment and peace just being with them with any of them.
"Look, maybe this is for the best," Alicia said as she sat down next to me and placed her hand on my shoulder. I shrugged it off.
"Explain to me how this for the best?" I asked as I tried to block out another image of Trey with someone else out of my mind.
"Trey won't have to worry about losing you now, and now we can be together and raise Prue," she said and that was the spark I needed to reignite the fire.
"I knew you did this on purpose," I shouted as I stood up.
"Bear, I'm not gonna tell you again-" she said likely about to tell me to be quiet for the kid.
"Fuck you and your kid! You probably cost me the most important thing in my life and I'm gonna make you sorry that you did!" I yelled as loud as I could. As I stormed off toward the door I heard the kid crying over the baby monitor and I almost felt sorry as slammed the door closed behind me.
I hopped into my truck and peeled away from Alicia's house. As the distance grew, I started to feel guilty for how I had left. No matter how pissed I was with Alicia, I should never have deliberately tried to wake up her kid, which was also my kid. That thought settled in my stomach like a pit. I should have been happy that I had a child, but the way it came about and what it had potentially cost me didn't seem fair. One thing was sure though and that was that I wasn't gonna let my relationship with Trey end without a fight.
TREY'S POV
Jamal drove us around for a while and we talked about things I'd never intended to tell him. I did manage to steer clear of most personal stuff involving my relationship with Bear though. Even with that, I enjoyed talking with him and I still wasn't sure how I felt about the apparent chemistry between us.
"You wanna go back to my place for a bit?" He asked out of the blue and that threw a monkey wrench in the smooth processing speed of my brain.
"Uh," I said dumbly.
"We don't have to if you don't want to," he said and after looking over the situation, I decided to see where this went. Besides, he came off as a guy who wouldn't move further than I wanted to. At least, I hoped my instincts were right.
"Yeah, that sounds cool," I said after taking a deep breath.
He smiled and kept driving. After 20 minutes, we arrived at an apartment complex that looked rather new. The apartments weren't super big, at least it looked like they weren't from the outside, but they looked big enough.
He parked in a space and got out of the truck. This time I did open my door myself as while it was sweet that he wanted to open my door for me, it made me feel weird. He waited for me at the front of his truck with a smile like he knew what I was thinking about the door thing.
Again he placed a hand at the small of my back and guided me forward toward a ground floor apartment. He unlocked the door and turned on the lights and I saw that looks were deceiving. The apartment looked huge on the inside. It had an open floor plan with the kitchen separated from the living room by a few island counters. It was decorated in browns and blacks with little splashes of color here and there in the form of throw pillows and plants.
He had a roommate that he made a point of telling me over dinner was out of town for the next week. I saw three doors off to the side that had to be the two bedrooms and the bathroom. He showed me around the apartment which surprised me as I thought this was a pretext to go to his room.
He didn't stop in his room though. The tour ended with him leading me out the back door to something that surprised me again. There was a garden out there and while it wasn't big, it had quite a few plants and herbs out here. He had a few vegetables also and I could tell he was proud of his green thumb.
I looked at this big man again and this coupled with the things I'd learned about him over dinner and talking were in conflict with each other. At least, they were for what the stereotype of a man that looked like Jamal was.
"Let's go inside," he said and he guided me back inside. He grabbed two beers from the fridge, opened them with a bottle opener hanging next to it, and walked to the open door to his bedroom. He stopped next to it and looked over at me. I took a deep breath and walked over to his bedroom. I took one of the beers and walked into his room.
He turned on the lights, then dimmed them before closing the door. I looked at the closed door and I don't know why but I started to feel anxious and tense. It must have showed on my face as he aimed what I'm sure was supposed to be his most non-threatening smile in my direction. That eased the tension a little bit.
He took a swallow from his beer before sitting it down on the table near the door. I downed mine in one go. He chuckled and slowly walked over to me. He gently took the bottle from my grip and set it down. He then turned me to face him completely.
"Nothing has to happen here that you don't want to. All you have to do is say stop and I will," he said in a low deep baritone that affected me in a way I wasn't expecting.
"I'm... I'm good," I said then gulped audibly.
He smiled and gently grasped my chin before placing a gentle kiss on my lips. For some stupid reason I winced at first until he lips actually connected with mine. We just stayed that way, neither of us moving with just our lips touching for what seemed like forever, but it was really only a few seconds. When I felt his tongue lick against my lips, that seemed to flip a switch.
I opened and his tongue touched mine and I was stunned that I instantly wanted him in the worst way. It was a startling realization but I didn't dwell on it. What was once soft and tender became wild and frantic as the kiss became us trying to devour each other's faces.
I pulled at his shirt to liberate it from being tucked into his pants. He pulled away from the kiss long enough to pull his shirt off and I saw bare flesh that my hand gravitated to like a magnet. I ran my hands over his pecs and abs that made my fingers twitch as they touched him. He had two tattoos that I could see. A partial sleeve on his left arm with tribal markings and three lightning bolts over his right pec. I was curious about that one but now wasn't the time.
He pulled my shirt off and his eyes roamed over my body. I noticed that his dick twitched in his pants. He pulled me back to him and our hot kiss continued as he picked me up and laid me down on the bed with him on top of me.
My hands roamed his back and he moaned when my hands gripped his ass cheeks. He pushed our pelvises closer together and I could feel his hard dick digging into me and it was hot, for about minute before some strange feeling came over me. Maybe it was because it was this moment that I realized that after all of this, I hadn't once gotten hard.
I found this stupid as my body should have been reacting to this unbelievably hot guy who was currently shirtless while on top of me kissing me and grinding his hard dick into me. This was a dream come true for any gay guy out there, to have a hot guy, who was a full grown man, with his tongue in their mouth and giving them access to the majesty that was his amazing body.
I tried to focus and get my body to react like it was supposed to but it was like my dick was on vacation or something cause he was not participating. Then it got worse as suddenly, I felt a wave of guilt unlike I'd ever felt before wash over me and it almost made me sick. Of course it had to be about Bear.
It wasn't fair that I should feel guilty for being with Jamal when Bear had gotten drunk and cheated on me, and while I was in a fucking coma no less. I had every right to be with someone else when he had done so. But no, my damned body was here acting like it had been branded by Bear and it didn't recognize any other male body aside from his. I had lost all desire at this point and Jamal could tell.
"What's wrong?" He asked. He was out of breath but he didn't sound annoyed or anything and I had to hand it to him, I probably would have been.
"It's nothing. Let's keep going," I said before pulling him back to the kiss. It lasted for a few seconds before he sensed that my heart wasn't in it.
"Are you sure cause it doesn't seem like nothing," he said before pulling away from me and hovering over me.
"I'm fine, really," I said as I tried to pull him back to me again. This time he resisted though.
"It doesn't seem like you're into it," he said as he looked me square in the eyes.
"Why do you say that?" I asked as I felt the embarrassment welling up.
"Cause of this," he said before taking my hand and wrapping it around his hard dick and then gripping my soft one. I focused on the one thing that was unimportant in that particular moment. Even if we had gotten further than we had, I probably wouldn't have even been able to take the monster my hand was wrapped around.
"I want to, really," I said as I tried to will my dick to get hard. I thought of his body and of his hand that was currently still wrapped around my dick and my hand around his and nothing.
"Well, this doesn't tell that story," he said as he punctuated saying "this" with a quick squeeze of my still completely soft dick.
"I want to want to," I said before I sighed deeply and removed my hand from his still hard dick and covered my eyes.
"It's okay," he said as he pulled my hands away from my face. He smiled a genuine smile and I hated that I couldn't give him what he wanted.
"I don't need to get hard to do this. Let's just do it," I said but all he did was shake his head.
"Nun uh. If we were to do this I want you enjoying it as much as me or it's just a meaningless one way fuck and I'm not into that. I wanna fuck you long and good and I wanna see your dick straining so hard that it might just burst. I want you screaming my name and clawing my back and ripping my sheets off the bed and I wanna make you cum so hard that you'll forget your name. Somehow, I don't think that'll be happening," he said and damn, this guy was good at dirty talk.
"Damn," I gritted out in deep frustration. He just chuckled and leaned down to kiss my forehead before pulling off of me.
"Guess it just wasn't meant to happen," he said as he sat on the side of his bed.
"I'm sorry," I said as I sat up next to him. He was such a nice guy that I wanted to really give him something but my body just wouldn't cooperate. I felt like such a dick tease.
"It's okay, really," he said with a smile that made me feel really guilty. He got up and finished his beer before pulling his shirt back on. I did the same with my shirt. "Wanna watch a movie on Netflix?" He asked and while it was sweet of him, I just needed to leave.
"Nah man, not tonight. I think I just wanna go," I said before heading for the bedroom door.
"You don't have to," he said as he followed.
"I know, but I think I need to. I need to think," I said even though that process had already started.
"Okay. Let's go," he said as he opened the door to his bedroom and walked into the living room. I noticed that he looked a bit disappointed and I wondered if it was because we didn't have sex or because I wouldn't stay.
"No, I think I'm gonna call an Uber," I said wanting to end this night and die of embarrassment in peace.
"Nuh uh. I picked you up so I'm taking you home," he said and he sounded so adamant that I just gave up and let him take me back to my dorm.
The ride was in silence as I wondered what the hell was my problem. I looked at Jamal again and he still looked unbelievably sexy. Again I tried to think of him and his body and see if anything happened and nothing. Just to be sure, I thought of other guys and still nothing. At least it alleviated fears that I was one of those weird people who was racist against their own race as I had thought about all kinds of hot guys.
When he parked I went to jump out of his truck and jet it toward my room but he gripped my arm. It scared me at first until I realized that it wasn't a very tight grip that I could easily get out of. I looked at him and he didn't look mad. In fact, he looked self conscious and unsure of himself.
"Believe me it's not you. I don't know what's going on, but you don't have anything to worry about. You have a body any gay guy, and possibly some straight guys, would kill to have in their bed. Aside from that though, you have a beautiful personality. I'm actually surprised you're even single," I said and he smiled.
"I don't know exactly what this Bear did to you, but he's a damned fool to have hurt you. Please call me anytime. Even if it's just to talk," he said and again I cursed my body for rejecting this amazing guy.
"I will," I said before getting out of his truck.
"Take care," he said before I closed the door and he backed out. He waved and I waved back before he drove away. I looked at my phone and saw that it was after midnight.
I headed up to my room and when I arrived, I saw that Drake was asleep. I closed the door quietly then shook my head that I was being so considerate of him. I leaned against the door and for a final test conjured up the sexiest image I could of Bear in my head and my damned dick finally awoke from it's damned coma and reached full mast in a few seconds.
"Motherfucker," I said too loud.
"What," Drake said as he jolted awake with wide eyes.
"Nothing," I said full of frustration.
"What's your problem?" He asked, sounding a bit grouchy as he laid back down. I frowned at him as I noticed that he didn't have a shirt on. It was the first time he had ever done that since we'd been sharing the room. In fact, he dressed like it was the dead of winter before then and if I recalled correctly, this was the first time I'd ever seen his bare torso in all the time I'd known him. He looked fit but it was nothing I'd look at twice even if I did like him, which I didn't.
"What's that?" I asked, pointing at him as I ignored his question.
"What's what?" He asked with a scowl.
"That," I said as I pointed harder at his bare chest. When he realized what I was referring to he just rolled his eyes.
"Don't tell me this is the first time you've seen a guy's bare chest. I find that highly unlikely," he said with his signature smirk. I hadn't seen it in a minute and I had forgotten how much it made me want to punch his face.
"Whatever," I said as I rolled my eyes at him and walked over to my bed. I sat down and pulled off my shoes and socks before falling back on my bed. I then thought and panicked for a second before confirming that my dick had returned to it's resting state. The last thing I needed was Drake seeing me with a woody and mistakenly thinking it was over him.
"So, how was your date?" He asked sounding way too amused from what I could tell from not bothering to look at him.
"How do you know I was on a date?" I asked instead of answering his question.
"I know when somebody is getting ready for a date," he said still sounding amused.
"Why do you care?" I asked again not answering his question.
"I don't," he said obviously lying.
"Then why did you ask?" I asked him and I became amused toying with him.
"I can't ask a question?" He asked but I just rolled my eyes.
"Nope. I'm just a disgusting fag so my fag affairs shouldn't concern you," I said before standing up to pull off my jeans and tossed them along with my shirt onto the foot of my bed.
"You still on that?" He asked with a scowl.
"Yep," I said with a smirk before getting into bed and pulling the covers up. I grabbed my phone and turned my back to Drake and looked at my messages. I had one each from Liberty, Justice, Zane, and Mama with varying degrees of checking up on me. I reassured them I was fine.
"Goodnight sweetie," I said sweetly to Drake to mess with him.
"Fuck you," he said but not like he usually would.
"Not tonight. Maybe later," I said and I was surprised when I heard the unmistakable snort from trying to suppress laughter. I chose not to delve into that as I got a message from Jamal wishing me sweet dreams and telling me not to blame myself. The last thing he said was that I needed to settle things with Bear once and for all and see where we ended up.
What he said was true. I needed to settle things with Bear because, at least for my body anyway, things weren't settled with him. My body was acting as a gatekeeper to prevent me from doing something stupid. If only his had done the same, we wouldn't be here. I needed to talk to him again, but this time, I would walk away knowing for sure one way or another if we were done, or were we gonna stay together and work things out.
To be continued.... ************
Author's Note:
Hi everyone, and welcome back to the long awaited chapter 15 of The Chronicles of Trey
In this chapter, after two separate encounters with Alicia (Justice/Veronica and Bear), we see that she is completely delusional. More importantly though, we see that she planned what happened between herself and Bear, at least the sex part. Did she intend on getting pregnant? I guess we'll find out...
Trey and Bear try again to talk but this time it goes blows up in their faces big time. Their talk leads to an angry Trey making a date with Hoyt's friend Jamal. The date goes pretty well, especially with Jamal being exactly Trey's type, and it leads to Trey ending up back at Jamal's place. Things het hot and heavy but it's soon apparent to Trey that his body won't cooperate with him and the date ends with Trey embarrassed that he couldn't get it up.
After trying to think about Bear, his body responds and he realizes that it's probably because things are unsettled between the two of them. Now, Trey has to have one final try at settling things with Bear. Will they be able to work things out...
Find out in the next installment of The Chronicles of Trey.
I feel like I say this too much now, but please forgive the extremely long delay in this chapter. Between two bouts of being sick (one bout ruining my New Years plans) and my computer basically conking out, it's been a trying time. Good news though is that I got my new laptop and I love it. I promise that the next chapter won take over two months to release. In fact, It should be out before the end of the coming week.
Thanks you all for reading my story and waiting for the next chapter. Again, I apologize for the delay. Please send any comments to thestoryguy9783@gmail.com
Until next time... Nicky
Editor's Note:
Hey guys welcome back and sorry for the wait on this chapter. We see that Alicia is just as crazy as ever and the little friendship she was building with Trey was all a lie, and that she is totally trying to trap Bear.
Bear ends up confronting her about it and that is where we learn that she did have this somewhat planned, though they will have to be careful and not take it out on the child since it really isn't her fault that it happened.
Trey goes on a date with Jamal and everything seems to be going good for them until they get to Jamal's bedroom. Trey's body is fighting him every step of the way and now he is going to confront Bear once again and see if they are truly done or if they can work it out. My vote is please work it out boys.
Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter, let nicky know your thoughts at the email address listed above, and you can reach me at jd.kaster1987@gmail.com if you what to. So until the next chapter guys.
JDK