Disclaimers: I am an adult. I wrote this story based solely on imagination and have not infringed on anyone's copyright. This story involves homosexual sex between consenting males -- children will not appear in this or any future stories in this section. This story does not include blackmail, kidnapping, rape, minors, suicide, or homicide. Bareback sex is a risky sexual option, and this story does not encourage you to have unprotected sex. There are no links provided for finding this story elsewhere. If it is illegal in your jurisdiction to view, read, or have this material, or if you are a minor, you are asked to leave this story and this page.
The Holidays
Working for Pete and taking three classes proved more challenging than I first thought. I was fortunate to be doing well enough in English that I didn't have much to do. Arabic and Chinese practice was the most challenging two classes I could have chosen because, despite a short class time, practice in these two differing languages was difficult at best. My training partners were good guys, though, and we managed to pass the first semester with a fair B in both and gain enough mastery to move to the next level for my next semester.
Pete didn't give me any slack, and the push for the last two months of the project finished with a grand finale; he was able to secure a million more in funding than previously bargained in the contract, which earned Pete a significant bonus and a $5500 bonus for me payable to the college for anything the scholarship didn't cover. We celebrated at the steak place in Arlington, where this work journey began for me and a life living with the man I had fallen in love with.
"I couldn't have done this without you," Pete raised his glass of wine to toast me.
"I had a blast doing it. The experience I gained puts me on solid footing for my career plans."
"Are you still planning on working for the military after graduating?" Pete asked in a more serious tone.
"I think I've changed my mind about working as a civilian with them; I think I want to join them as an officer," I replied.
Pete nearly spat out his wine, "What?"
As supportive as he had been about most of my decisions, I was surprised at his reaction.
"Are you serious?" Pete asked me, turning white.
"I think that's one of my better alternatives, don't you? I could put in 20 years, retire with benefits, and then work for them as a contractor, making more."
"In 20 years, I'll be 62, and you'll be what, 40-41? This conversation was coming sooner or later. Where are we going to be in 20 years? In five?"
"Pete, you know I love you. I don't know where we will be in one year, let alone at the beginning of the new year when you need to return to New York. We've spent a wonderful summer together, and you want to stay through the holidays. However, I think we still need to discuss where we will be as a couple or even if we will still be a couple in a few months. I'm not angry; I think I knew everything I needed to know when we got together, but you're still married, and I don't know where you are with that. I never wanted us to end. I'm pretty sure you didn't either, but me here, you in New York, how's that going to work?"
"I didn't know you thought that much about this. We should have had this conversation throughout our relationship so we didn't have to hash this out all at once. I'm sorry I didn't plan better for this. I'm sorry this has weighed on your mind all this time."
"No, I can't let you take all the blame for it. I could have talked more with you about it if I wanted to. But, honestly, I didn't want to talk about it. I didn't want to think about it. I didn't want to face the end of us. I love you, I fucking love you, and this whole affair has been nothing but a dream come true. You and I need think about our future, what we want, and how we can be 'us' forever."
"Do you want an 'us' forever?"
"You know I do. I'm not going to get mad that you even asked me that. For once, I can't picture the ending, much less the ending I want."
"I'm sorry, of course you do. I shouldn't have said that. I thought you might want to find someone your age once the newness wore off."
I smiled at him, "I don't think the newness will ever wear off. You know I did picture you in 20 years and even pictured myself in 20, and I hope I'll be as much a man as you are at that age."
"You know she's not giving me a divorce. I asked recently, and she still says 'no.'"
"You know that I cannot be a kept man after this summer."
"I wouldn't even think about trying that with you. Should we see someone to help us? A therapist or psychologist? I want this to work, but we have lines that we need to learn how to cross.
"I'd be willing to do that so I didn't have to spend a day alone without you again."
We drove home that night, discussing my plan to join the military. I didn't give in, but I did have second thoughts if the remote possibility existed that Pete and I could be together forever. Pete was more supportive than he was at dinner, though I felt he wasn't thoroughly convinced that it was as great an idea as I thought.
The following morning, Pete began discussing the holidays.
"I think I should go to New York for Thanksgiving. I wish I could take you, but we both know how that would appear."
"Well, I did tell my mother that I'd make more of an effort to come home for holidays; maybe this is the one I go to. It's not a long break, but we can discuss, more importantly, what we're doing for Christmas.
"I would like us to be together for Christmas, just the two of us. I want to be with you the entire holiday break. Did you make any commitments to your family about then?"
"I hadn't, and I'd very much like to be cuddled up against you, drinking a scotch-laced eggnog and talking about anything, doing anything, waking up late, going out to eat, whatever as long as it's with just you."
"I love you," he hugged me. "I think that would be the perfect Christmas present I could ever receive."
By the time Thanksgiving week had arrived, Pete and I had seen a relationship therapist a few times who seemed to understand our predicament and gave us the space to talk about it, even the very uncomfortable parts. We had yet to make much progress, though, and I was anxious about my future with Pete. We parted at the airport and resolved to get on track when we were both back in town.
I drove to Ohio, and while the days were shorter, I still arrived in daylight. I stopped at Billy's house first.
"Billy!" I cried out, hugging him on his front doorstep.
"Little buddy, it's great to see you again. Look at you -- bigger, tighter, beefier than the last time you were here." He helped me with one of my bags from the car, and we went into his living room. He closed the door and kissed me deeply.
"Damn, little buddy, I've missed you; you look great -- except not too happy. What's going on?"
"Do you have a beer? I wanted to see you before anyone. I missed you, too."
"What's going on, really? I'll get us one each, but you only get one, that's it!"
He went off to the kitchen, and I could see his muscled ass moving nicely, even in a pair of sweatpants. It looked hot, but I wasn't here for sex just yet.
"So why did you come to see me before your parents?" Billy asked, handing me a beer and putting his free hand on my neck.
"Billy, I don't even know where to begin. You know I love him, he's married, and he's returning to New York at the beginning of the year. I don't know what to do."
"Did you guys have a fight? Is he getting back with the wife?" Billy massaged my neck with his thumb.
"No, no fight. He says he's asked for divorce again, and she said 'no.' We've been going to counseling and can't find a way to make this work."
"I'm sorry to hear that. I should be happy because I'd pack up and move in with you. But I can't take advantage like that."
We talked for several hours, and despite a one-beer limit, Billy caved in and gave me a couple more as we discussed Pete's looming departure. I wasn't drunk, but I wasn't driving either.
"I don't know if there is anything I can say that would help," Billy sounded as sad as I did.
He pulled me to his chest and rubbed the back of my head as I cried for a little bit.
"I know you needed that, but crying isn't going to fix this problem," Billy said quietly after a bit.
"I don't want to talk about it anymore anyhow," I sniffed, pulling myself together. "You're right, too."
"Little buddy, I wish I could take this pain away for you," he hugged me. "C'mon, you need some sleep."
He grabbed my hand, and we went to his bedroom. He went to his top drawer and handed me a pair of green shorts and a T-shirt.
"Do you want a shower, or do you want to lay down and go to sleep?" he asked.
"I'm not sweaty or filthy, but a shower may wash some of this away. Will you come with me?"
He undressed and took my hand, and we took a long, hot shower together, with him hugging me from behind. I didn't feel much better when we dried off and got dressed for bed, but I was relaxed. Billy spooned me into his arms, and we settled into sleep. He was a gentleman and a friend that night. He didn't try anything sexual, and he held me, and the simple act of listening made me fall asleep comfortably in his arms.
Just before daylight, I woke with a raging hard-on and still in the same spot I had fallen asleep in Billy's arms. He was lightly snoring, and his beard was tickling my neck. I pushed my ass across his groin. His snoring lightly faltered. He grabbed me tighter and pressed his cock against my butt. He wasn't totally there, but his semi was promising something that I wanted badly. He was still sleepy, I could tell, but he kept grinding into me, and it was sensual and getting me horny. I could feel the wet spot I was making on my shorts. He lazily reached down and pulled my shorts down to my knees. He grabbed him, got them down, reached over to his nightstand, and grabbed the lube bottle. He panted as he coated his cock with the gel. He pushed gruffly at my hole and slipped in from behind me. It felt glorious. He was hard, had the right amount of lube, and began sliding in me back and forth. I started gasping and panting. His hairless balls smacked against mine, and he grabbed me tighter by my waist.
"Fuck, little buddy, that's nice and tight. You're so fucking hot and wet. I'm not going to last long."
He reached down with a still gooey hand and began jacking me off -- matching stroke for stroke what he was plowing into me. I was light-headed and dizzy, and so horny that I had my first cock in two days. I didn't care that he was fucking me from behind. There was nothing impersonal about what he was doing to me. He was kissing my neck, breathing hard, whispering that he liked my tight hole and getting thicker and firmer every minute. He was so hard that I could feel the veins of his cock as he pounded me harder and harder.
"I can't help it, little buddy; I love you," he gasped in my ear as his cock thickened so much that it got stuck for a second as he began unloading his balls into my ass. I felt the thickness and the pulsing of his cock, and it pushed me over the edge. I bucked violently against him as I began pumping my own load into his fist and all over the sheets. He held me closely as he finished unloading into me and making sure I was thoroughly masturbated. I could feel the final spasms of his cock, and our breathing slowed down.
"Billy," I said quietly and sadly.
He pretended that he and I hadn't said anything. He didn't respond vocally; he only held me tighter. He only let go of his grip on me when the sun finally started coming through the windows.
We both got a shower together. I kissed him and kept kissing him during the entire shower. I kissed him harder when he tried to pull away from me; I kissed him deeper when he tried to speak. He didn't fight me and didn't seem to get angry; he just allowed me to keep my lips on his.
"Little buddy," he said finally as we began to dry each other off, "It's so damned hard watching you leave every time. I love seeing you when you come to town, but I know you're going back."
"Billy, I'd go back even if Pete wasn't there. I need to finish school. I want you to find happiness wherever you can. You're so fucking handsome, so hot, you would be the one who gets to choose who you'd be with. You need to forget me while I'm gone and find your man, someone who does what you need and want from a guy."
"That's pretty easy for you to say, isn't it? You got a man who you're in love with."
"I didn't go looking for him. In fact, I didn't plan it. My plan was to fuck my way through college, get a job and find a guy. Pete came along, and it didn't fit the plan. And you know I'm not sure of any future with him. I do love him. Maybe not in the same way, but I love you - the way I love you. Can't we have good sex while we're together?"
"The minute he hurts you, I'm there busting his ass, you got that?"
I spent the day with my extended family at my parent's house and enjoyed myself. I still had a lot of questions about my job, car, and college. I didn't dress up, but I was well-dressed for dinner and received my fair share of looks.
"Your mother and I were wondering if we might come to Virginia and visit you next year," Dad asked me.
"Uhm, sure. Did you have a time planned?" I asked, nervous.
"We thought around the beginning of April."
"Yeah, that would be a nice time to visit, warmer and prettier than here," I logged the timeframe in my head; I needed to keep my social schedule cleared.
"Hey Billy," my dad yelled, "didn't you say you might go with us?"
"I thought if little buddy would have me, yeah, I could ask for the time off at work," Billy said.
"Sure," I stammered, "that would be great!"
Driving home from Ohio, I thought a lot about my future with Pete. I wasn't ready to let him go without trying to find a solution. But the answer wasn't obvious, and trying to think of different scenarios in my head was not working for me. I loved the man, but I couldn't see how it would work now that I had been spoiled by having him full-time.
I chose to spend the next month with a positive mindset about the upcoming new year and tried to live wildly in the moment with Pete. He must have chosen to do the same thing because we tried hard during counseling, didn't argue, and loved each other like we had for the last eight months. I had moments of sadness and breakdowns that I hid from Pete when I was alone.
We decorated tastefully for Christmas and spent a quiet Christmas Eve together, having the most blissful sex with each other. I slept as close to him that night as I did the first night we were together. We woke up dreamily the following morning and snuggled together.
"C'mon, why don't we get up and see what Santa brought you. I'll make us some coffee, and we could go to brunch downtown at the mall.
He dragged me to the living room after he started coffee and sat me on the couch. There were loads of presents, all glamorously wrapped under the tree. He kept bringing them to me one by one: A new, sexy, and very revealing swimsuit that I knew would leave no room for the imagination once I put it on. He brought me a box with three blue pairs of booty shorts with the initials "CSL Club" imprinted on them. The next box was a beach tote with sunscreen, sunglasses, and towels. The last box was a thin little box that weighed nothing. I shook it and could feel nothing. When I opened it, I found two plane tickets to Cabo San Lucas for next year's spring break.
"I know this has been a hard month for you. It has been for me, too. And I know that until March, we will both have some hard times apart. Given the circumstances, I thought you and I could go to Mexico again for spring break and try to have as much fun as the last time.
I looked over the tickets again and felt tears welling in my eyes, but I swallowed hard, shook my head, and hugged him.
"I love you, I think I always will, and I would love a repeat of Spring Break with you! Now that reminds me, I have a gift for you as well. It's not as nice as all of this, but I hope you like it."
I handed him a small box that could easily fit in the palm of his hand. "Open it," I said.
He fumbled with the little bit of paper covering the box. It was a very masculine and stylish pinky ring. I had engraved inside, "I'll always love you, T."
For as much as I controlled myself looking at the tickets, Pete lost control of his emotions, burst out crying with heavy sobs, and reached out to hug me. He buried his face into my neck and heaved and cried loudly. I reached up and grabbed one of his hands, held it tightly, and rubbed the back of his neck with my other hand. Slowly, his tears and quivering began to subside.
"This means the. . .world. . .to me," he managed to say, trying to fight back a new wave of tears.
"You mean the world to me," I said, hugging him tight.
He didn't cry nearly as hard as the first time, but he did break down again, and I comforted him. We sat on the couch together, and I put my arm around his shoulders. He leaned on my chest, looking at the ring on his finger, still sniffling.
"Hold on a second," I said as I got up, walked over to the bar, and grabbed the scotch bottle.
"Here, you need this," I smiled as I poured a nice shot into his coffee. I poured a little in mine as well.
He reached his hand out to me, and I put the scotch bottle down. I sat down next to him.
"I'm sorry, I don't know where that came from," he rubbed the back of my hand with his thumb.
"Don't apologize. We both know where it comes from," I reached out and put my hand on his chest over his heart.
We sat on the couch with his head on my chest as I touched him all over his face and neck with my fingers, whispering, "I love you." Usually, I was the one being held in his arms when we sat down or were in bed; today, I was the one who did the holding, the stroking, and the comforting. He was touched in a way today that made him restless and emotional. We both fell asleep for a little bit right there on the couch with my arms wrapped around him. He held both my hands that lay on his chest.
After returning home from brunch, I suggested we go to the pool. "Hey, no need to wait until March to see these," I smiled as I held the swim trunks I got this morning.
Pete laughed at me and hugged me closely, "I got the same pair for myself. Do you want to give the people at the pool a show?"
My eyes lit up, and we both slipped into our trunks. I pulled out a pair of shorts and gave him a pair to cover up with as I pulled a pair mine on. I grabbed a towel for us both and headed to the pool. It was Christmas day, and we weren't surprised that the pool area was empty. We both removed our shorts, laid them on a chair, and walked on opposite sides of the pool towards the deep end. The trunks fit like gloves and were actually magical in the way they hugged our goods and asses. If there was ever a dad/son cologne commercial with muscular bodies and tight swim trunks, we'd be the ones helping sell out that product. We still had a long way to go to the end, and the door opened. We didn't even turn around; we continued walking, perhaps just a little more confidently. When we reached the back, we looked at who had come in. It was our pal Andy. You could actually see him blushing at us as he waved meekly.
Andy had put on some muscle over the past few months since we last saw him, and he looked great. We motioned for him to come to an end, and he slid his shorts down, exposing one of the best-looking asses I had seen on a man his age. My mouth dropped open, and I began drooling. His new cut-up muscle was magnificent. He looked good before, and he is downright delicious now. I started firming up as this hot, muscular guy walked our way. We hadn't played again with Andy since our May three-way, and I wondered if this was a bonus Christmas present heading our way. He reached out a muscular arm and shook our hands, flexing nicely with each of us.
"You're looking great, stud," Pete said, "You've been to the gym."
"Thanks -- you two look as great as the last time I saw you." He was smiling broadly.
"What are you doing here today? Surely the kids and wife aren't in DC again?" Pete asked.
"Yeah, they just left for winter break, and I decided to stay back a few days and finish a few work projects since no one is really calling in right now. I'm joining them before New Year's Eve."
Pete looked over at me sheepishly and then back to Andy. Andy smiled, knowing the look, and I laughed.
We quickly returned to the penthouse and brought Andy into the bedroom. Andy pushed Pete down on the bed playfully and lifted his legs up. Andy smiled; he had been waiting for this moment since May. Andy began eating out of Pete's hot hole. I stood over Pete, and he sucked my cock. Andy pushed Pete's legs back further to expose his hole and started grunting and snorting, eating out my boyfriend. Pete moaned with my cock in his mouth, dripping precum on his tongue, and began bucking when Andy stuck his tongue into his hole. Pete's legs trembled in the air, but he loved every second of being serviced and servicing me. I was steadily dripping precum into his mouth, and he had beaded a good bit on his tight belly. Andy had lubed his cock while eating Pete out and stood up. I pulled my cock from Pete's mouth, and Andy put himself between Pete's legs. Pete looked up at Andy with a vulnerable look on his face, and Andy pushed himself into Pete's tight, wet hole. Pete tensed up and turned a few shades of red. Andy finished his descent into Pete, and he gasped. He turned into a little slut for Andy, who started doing a superb job of pounding Pete, and he cried out every time Andy hit bottom. You could tell he was getting every box checked with Andy inside him.
Andy took advantage of his position as the most wanted and began rubbing, touching, and hugging Pete, who whimpered and grabbed at every muscle Andy had exposed. Andy pushed him back onto the bed, got close to Pete's face, and began talking dirty. Pete groaned, pulled his legs back even further, and looked at me with a lost-in-heaven look. Andy kept talking dirty and grabbed the headboard and began seriously pounding Pete's ass, and began panting and getting short of breath, gasping and crying out simultaneously. He was lost in ecstasy that he most likely didn't experience with his wife. His muscles tensed up, his eyes rolled back to the back of his head, and his mouth was open just slightly. Pete put his hands on Andy's rib cage and screamed as violent rope after rope of come began spurting all over him. Andy kept pounding at his ass, smashing against Pete's prostate as he shot hands-free all over himself. Once Pete had subsided, Andy let loose a guttural cry and loaded him with the contents of his balls. Andy huffed, threw his head back, and pounded the last of his come into Pete's ass.
Out of breath, sweaty, and fully unloaded, both men lay on their backs, catching their breath.
I brought each of them a scotch. They took a sip and sat them down.
"That was a great fuck, Andy," Pete began, "My boy is going to need guys like you in his future. Would you be able to come to see him every now and then?"
"What happened?" Andy sat up, his eyes wide as saucers, "are you breaking up?"
"I'm married, too. This was an extended assignment, and I was lucky enough to sleep with this guy every night." Pete looked at me.
"But I'm not going to be here for a while," Pete continued, "work in New York is waiting for me at the beginning of the year. I want him sleeping with quality guys, not just his teammates. Will you be able to take care of him?"
Andy looked at me and then back at Pete, very confused.
"He's not lying," I said, "he's going back, and I'm living here for another year or so."
"You guys are taking this pretty well," Andy began.
"No, we're not," Pete interrupted, "we are coming to terms with it and planning. If I look like I'm taking this well, I'm doing a good acting job."
"I'm sorry, guys. You two looked so good and happy together."
"We have tried to make this work, but it can't, given what we both are doing otherwise. He's not leaving school, and I can't retire yet."
Andy reached out his hand to me and pulled me towards him. "I'll keep an eye on him until you get back."
After Andy left, Pete and I sat on the couch, sipping scotch.
"Champ, I want you to call Sean and see if he can come over today."
I looked at him, "What are you doing?"
"Just see if you can get him to come over, please."
When he finally showed up, Pete hugged Sean firmly and for a long time. Sean looked at me curiously when he looked over Pete's shoulder.
"I thought we'd brighten your day by having you come over. C'mon guys, let's go to the bedroom."
"Champ, I want you to make love to this guy right here, right now," Pete said.
I blushed. We all undressed and got onto the bed together. I began by eating Sean out. I put my tongue on his waiting hole. Pete lay next to Sean and began kissing him deeply and sensually. "Close your eyes and pretend it's him," Pete said.
Sean groaned as I began working over his hole. He moaned when Pete stuck his tongue down his throat. I watched Sean touch Pete's neck and run his hand through Sean's hair. The kissing we reserved for each other was being generously given to Sean. I almost began to get jealous for the first time during all the three-way we had with Sean. Sean cried out as my tongue lapped back and forth over his hole, he got goosebumps when I ran my beard between his thighs, and he quivered when I put my mouth on his cock. I was dripping serious precum because of the hot sight of watching Pete kiss him hard and Sean's moans.
I lubed myself up as Sean writhed under my mouth. I stood up, and Pete broke their kiss, and I lifted up Sean's legs, and in one sensual thrust, I was in him. He cried out but smiled broadly. He wrapped his hands behind my head and pulled my face to his neck. I kissed him behind his ear. We had first done it together alone, and it drove Sean insane. He ran his hands across my back and shoulders and became flush. He moaned harmoniously and began to whimper when I started sliding in and back into his well-prepared hole. He lifted his legs up even further and, as he turned all shades of pink and red, with his eyes closed, accepted my thrusts like a lover on the verge of a long, sustained orgasm. He frantically buried his nose into my neck, smelling me; he brought one of his hands to the hairline on the back of my neck and played with it, feeling it with delight and trepidation. I stayed solidly in his hole and was engorged beyond my normal proportions. It wasn't painful, but my cock was turgid and swollen.
My balls were slowly but predictably beginning to churn; the sexy twitch in my thighs told me that this orgasm was going to be a knockout for both of us. I lost myself to Sean, forgetting that Pete was in the room. Sean cried out and, in a frenzy, began grunting, burying his face into the cleavage of my pecs. He also forgot Pete was with us. Each thrust into him brought a tiny cry from Sean and a deep breath from me. I began to firm up thicker, and Sean pulled his head up to my neck and held on to my shoulders for dear life. We were one together, and we both worked to bring gratification to each other, first realizing that in doing so, we would ultimately please ourselves as well. I scooped one hand under his lean but broad shoulders. I began letting loose an orgasm for the record books into his beautifully glistening hole.
"Sean, Sean, buddy," I screeched as I began depositing my seed into him.
"Thom, I love. . ." Sean whispered hoarsely as he reached his climax, failing to utter the last word as hard ropes of come began shooting between us. I held him as he shuddered and quivered as his orgasm began to subside.
Pete left the room and returned a minute later with a scotch for both of us. He looked at both of us in a melancholy way.
"Guys, that was pretty intense," Pete said, looking at both of us back and forth, "He's made love to me like that before, but watching the two of you made me realize how lucky I've been these past nine months. He's perfect, and Sean, I want you to adore and worship him as much as I do. Take care of him."
"That won't be hard, Pete. I have worshiped him for a long time, and I think he knows I adore him," Sean replied, putting his arm around me, pulling my head to his shoulder, and kissing my forehead.
After Sean left, Pete put on some Christmas music, poured us two eggnogs, and got a few crackers, cheese, and fruit from the fridge. He sat down next to me and pulled my head under his arm.
"Forget the sex for just a moment; today was one of the best days I've spent with you," Pete said.
"I can forget the sex, but we've had so many great experiences together; how did today make it to the top?" I asked.
"I loved seeing you get excited, like a kid at Christmas, just in a different way. I got to be with you with no agenda, no deadlines, no thinking about the future, no thinking of. . ." his voice trailed off.
I sat up and grabbed his chin, tears streaming down his face. I kissed each one, trying to take them away, trying to take the pain away. I put my hand on his head and nuzzled my nose into his.
"Pete, I love you. Please don't cry, or I'm going to cry as well. You know I love you and I wouldn't have minded if we spent the day together, just you and me. You know, you are enough for me."
He continued crying and rubbing the back of my head. I felt myself on the verge of tears. I sighed and pulled him to me. Sometimes, it's just best to let it out. Cry, but realize that it isn't going to fix anything. I let him get this out of his system.
"Thank you," he said, "you don't judge me, criticize me, you allow me to be me with you. I love you for that. I love you!"
"I want to tell you something about why I can't stay. I want you to know that the real reason I have to return is something you may end up hating me for. I hope you don't, but you must understand my motivations, and I need to come clean," Pete continued.
I sat up after he got my attention with that. I wasn't angry and tried hard to have an open mind.
"I've asked her again for a divorce, and she has again said 'no.' But the no is not necessarily true. I continue to get the no because we signed an iron-clad prenuptial before we got married. It was her idea, not mine. She comes from a family with tons of old money. She had a billion-dollar trust fund when we got married. It has done well through good investments and proper management, and my girls are the beneficiaries. I won't go into the details, but it's a good sum. She's actually said 'yes' every time I've asked for a divorce. But she also reminds me that with that, our prenup ensures that I get nothing -- absolutely nothing."
"So she had said 'yes' when you told me it was a 'no.'"
"Yes, that's," he struggled with the word, "accurate." He closed his eyes and sighed, grimacing.
"But if you got the divorce you asked for, you don't get your portion of her trust fund?"
"Right," he looked at me.
I paused briefly, taking in what he just admitted to me. I looked at the floor for a bit, then at him, then back to the floor again.
"Well, she sounds horrendous. But then I thought that early on in our relationship. You are making the right decision. After putting up with that type of shit, excuse me, for the last ten years or so, you deserve every penny. What did you think I would hate you for choosing the money?"
He nodded and began to speak, but I interrupted him.
"I don't know exactly what I would have done in your situation, but if everything you've told me about her is true, you deserve it. I love you. I don't see you making this about money or me. You've had me, you still have me, and you probably will always have me somehow, but I don't blame you for taking what you've worked for or had to put up with. I don't think anything bad about you. How could I?"
He put his hand to his mouth. His frightened face softened and relaxed.
"You asked me once to teach you to love me like I love you," he said, "I couldn't have ever taught you that. You know how to love me; you know how to love. I love you. I'm always going to love you."
"I love you. Look at what you've done for me this year. I was a scruffy, jocky, glorified cocktail waiter. You cleaned me up and got me clothes I would have never dreamed I'd wear; I'm driving a hot-looking car, living with the best-looking, most loving man in the world. Never in a million years would I have ever pictured this for me. I hope the time we've spent together has been as great for you as it has been for me."
"It has been the best time of my life. Nothing compares; nothing will ever compare. Great isn't even a word I'd associate with our time together. Unforgettable, unbelievable, unrivaled, all wrapped into one. Sean and Andy are quality guys, you know? I know that when I'm gone, you're going to need regular sex. I hope you'll think about having them as regular buddies. I don't want to see you beat up or mixed up with the wrong guy. Straight teammates aren't going to satisfy you. But I can't stop you from seeing who you want to see. Just make sure you're safe and with guys who will value you for more than just a fuck."
"What about you?" I asked, "You've gotten regular sex with me for the past nine months or whenever you're in town. How are you going to handle this? You need a quality guy or two yourself."
"New York has anything and everything you can want. I'm never going to find someone like you, and I don't want to. I'll manage. Here, I didn't have to worry about running into people I knew; I'd need to be more careful. Maybe some married guy who wants something on the side with no commitments."
"Pete, do you think you'll ever come back?"
"I have to come back a few times next year to follow up on the project, and I'll spend as much time as possible. We've got spring break."
"But you also have two daughters, a career you plan to finish in a few years."
"I know what you're asking, and I can't, no, I won't make a promise to you I can't keep. I know I said you'd be able to spend the year here, but I've decided that I'm going to take care of this place for you for the rest of your time in college. I don't want to see you going from dorm to dorm every year. I want you settled and stable."
"Settled and stable is being with you," I said sadly.
"You can't have that if I'm not settled and stable. Let's not go through this. Let's enjoy our last week together."
We spent the next few days together, going to dinner, having lots of sex, spending time at the pool, and just lounging around like most people do during the holidays. Pete reminded me a lot of the times we spent during the year, and he made every little thing we did a memory from his point of view. It was hard to hear some of it, not because it was sad; I remembered the exact times the same way. We had found a bond that you only find once in a lifetime if you're lucky.
The weekend before New Year's Eve, Pete and I went to the Kennedy Center for the symphony, shopping for clothes and shoes, haircuts and massages, coffee, and exploring. We finished the weekend at our favorite restaurant in Arlington.
"It's been another great weekend with you," Pete said to me timidly, "I'm going to miss this."
"I'm going to miss you, I'm going to miss sleeping with you, I'm going to miss seeing you every day."
"You know, I've been thinking about something, and I don't want to get your hopes up, but I have a good stash of vacation saved up -- probably six weeks. I know I'll probably have some family things with my daughters I will be involved in, but I want to spend as much time as I can with you. I know I'll be here at least six times for the project -- I'll max out the week, and with at least four vacations, we'll be able to see each other about ten to twelve weeks this year. I hope I can stay with you at the penthouse."
"You know I'm not going to say 'no' to that," I said sadly.
"But I've been thinking, too, about the coming year. I love you, you know that, but I have to tell you that I don't want my emotions jerked around every time you come and then leave. I'm seriously not trying to sound rude. Still, you have to understand that every time you left last year, you drained me emotionally. I can't be my best, perform at my best with that every few weeks. I know this was the best year of my life with you around. I know you have to return, for work, if nothing else. Knowing you would be the first person I saw when I got home every day was the highlight. And I know I'd be excited for you to return and feel bad for a few weeks when you leave. I don't want to live like that. We have to reevaluate what our relationship is now. I want you to come as often as you can. And I'll be all yours when you are here. We could be like before you spent the year, maybe not. I don't know now that I've been fortunate enough to have you with me night and day for nine glorious months."
"Are you saying that you want to see other people? That you are looking for a new 'boyfriend'?" Pete looked sadly at me.
"No, I'm not thinking of another 'boyfriend.' No one would even hold a candle to you, and I will need a lot of time to decompress from this. I know I have your blessing with Andy and Sean, and that's safe. But you also know they're married, and I'm not, and well, you know how much I like sex. They may not always be available."
"So you want to screw around until you find a new 'boyfriend'?" Pete was getting terse.
"I'd never call you my boyfriend -- that belittles what we had. And I've told you that I'm not looking for a replacement for you. I know you're paying the rent and utilities on the penthouse, but I guess I'm asking for no surprises. You know that I had a lot of sex. I don't want to dishonor you by appearing to be some slut in your eyes."
"I know you'd never be that to me, no matter what. I understand your need for privacy, but I have no right to interfere. I'm married, and I can't ask you to be celibate except with me. But can I ask one thing? How often are you talking about?"
"I had sex once a day, sometimes twice, or more a few times when I lived in the dorm," I replied, not grimacing but not defiant either.
"I know we've gone over this before, but I suppose I realize where we are at this point," Pete said, "I'm not going to tell you to stop; you can't, most likely, and I'm not going to have you resent me. Can you be only mine when I'm in town, please?"
"You always have been my only when you were in town, and if someone else had me, you watched it," I said, "and that's a promise I can make. I can also promise that I'm not looking for a replacement in my heart for you. That's impossible, and I don't want to right now."
"I'm being foolish again, aren't I?" Pete looked me in the eyes.
"The reality is sinking in for both of us; we're going into a phase without knowing how it will end. You've never been foolish, and you aren't now. I'm as afraid of this as you are. How do you picture this ending if it were perfect?"
"If it were perfect, I'd be divorced and living here with you for the rest of my life."
"Then we need to take our time apart like men, make a plan, so that can happen."
"You really do want that?" Pete asked as his eyes brimmed with tears.
"I do! I want to spend what time we both have together."
We dropped the subject and enjoyed the rest of our dinner.
Pete and I spent a quiet evening at home sipping some fine cognac in pajamas with his arm wrapped around me for New Year's Eve. We didn't talk much, and having him close to me felt good without any dramatic conversation. I caught him admiring his ring and a few heavy sighs several times, but it was a peaceful evening.
When we finally made it to bed, I slipped off my pajamas and put my hand up to Pete's chest to help him out of his. He grabbed my hand and kissed it. I could see his eyes shining even in the darkness and a gentle smile. I put my hand on his face, pulled him to me, and kissed him passionately. He put both his hands on my waist. He slipped out of his pajamas and lay down on the bed. We didn't need words; I knew he wanted me in him. I lay next to him and began kissing him again and rubbing my hands over his lightly hairy chest and muscled arms. I reached down and felt his glorious ass and cupped it in my hand firmly. He moaned.
I continued kissing him as I generously fingered lube into his hole. He lifted his legs and held the back of his knees as I found my way between them and positioned myself at his waiting hole. I pushed in slightly, and he groaned. He was ready and willing. I slid further in, and he arched his back. He panted as I gently moved in and out, warming him up. I bent down to kiss his neck, and he pulled my head towards him closer and let out a long, loud sigh. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, buried my face next to his neck, and began to sensually glide in and out of him. Pete had his hands on my back and was moving them slowly up and down, stopping every now and then and grabbing hard when a fit of pleasure hit him in a particular way, usually when my cock touched his prostate. Although there was a part of me that wanted to get to my knees, grab his ankles, and plow him hard, the closeness and love I felt for him kept me where I was. While it may not have been the acrobatics we were used to, this session would be a record of our lovemaking. We didn't speak, but there were plenty of gasps, pants, and sighs as we began building to our climaxes simultaneously. I firmed up thicker and stayed steady with my thrusts. Pete moaned more loudly and kissed my neck, cupping my head in his hands.
"I love you, Thom," he groaned, placing his hands on my back again.
"Pete, I love you," I moaned back as I put my mouth to his and kissed him.
For the first time in all of the times we had sex together, my orgasm was not a violent shot but rather a physical release of my love for him. It was powerful and emotional and lasted for well over a minute. He heaved underneath me and began coming over himself between us. We weren't panting, we weren't sweaty, but we were satisfied. I rolled over beside him and slipped my hand under his neck.
"Come here, old man!" I leaned over and kissed him on his ear.
He laughed at me and snuggled closer to me. We fell asleep before midnight in each other's arms. We finished the year together in a similar way to how we had begun it. And I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
We woke the following day still holding each other. I felt Pete was restless during the night, and when we woke up, I could see the sleepiness in his red-rimmed eyes. I hugged him harder and said nothing. Today, he would be packing and leaving on a late plane back to New York and home again.
"Let's go to breakfast," he said quietly as he realized I was awake.
We took a shower together, and I held him from behind and laid my head on his back. The shower brought Pete back to life in a small way, and while he wasn't his regular chipper self, what bothered him didn't seem to last any longer, or at least not nearly as much.
"I am really thinking about our plan," he said as he began packing his first suitcase.
"I know you are, and I've been thinking about it, too," I replied, sitting on the bed watching him.
"I still plan on retiring in about five years. My oldest daughter is talking about some guy she's met, and it seems serious, so if it goes the way I think it will go, she'll be married within two years. I want my girls happy, but things will be smoother if they get married before my retirement. I plan on taking every offering that involves everything from DC to Norfolk. There's been talk about building an officer's school at the Norfolk Naval Station, and that project could be just as involved as this one was. I would want your assistance again if that comes up."
"I'd love that. Would we be here, or would you need to be in Virginia Beach?"
"We may have to be in that area, but you could always transfer to Old Dominion; they also have a good swim team."
"I know, I've looked into that myself. I know it's only talk, but do you know their timeframe for building this school?"
"I've heard plans as early as November this year."
"Pete, we could actually have a chance of being together next year! That makes me excited. Why couldn't we have had this information before now? We've spent the better part of the past three months trying to find a way to make it work, and this sounds like the way to get there!
"It's still in the planning stages, but I'll get an update tomorrow when I get back, and I'll let you know what I find out. I will still miss you between now and my next visit."
I hugged him, "I'm going to miss you too, but no tears today, no worrying, we have something that could be our ticket together."
"I need you to buckle down this semester and get as many credits as you can handle behind you. If this happens, you'll need to give me more time than you were available this year. I will have $200 a week from the firm in advance of the work this year; that way, you don't have to work so much. Do you want to go back to that little bar to earn some spending cash?
"I thought about it, and maybe I could just go down to two days a week and add two classes."
"I also thought about one other thing, and we don't need to have a big discussion about it today, but I want you to think about this carefully while I'm gone. I'll want an answer the next time I see you. You have career plans that are different from my idea of plans. Still, I was hoping you could consider being my personal assistant when you graduate until I retire. That's a year and a half of school left, and you could come live in New York."
"Where? Your hou--," I began, my eyes as big as saucers.
Pete cut me off, "Think about it, that's all I'm asking. We got this far; we can hammer out the details later."
"I will," I replied, setting off a lot of projected scenarios in my head all at once. I needed to snap out of it and get focused on the present. But a sense of relief came over me, and while I was sad Pete was leaving, I thought about what could be a good year.
"I will, I promise," I repeated, looking at him sadly but still smiling at him.
"Good, I love you," he said.
Pete finished packing, and we chatted about next semester. We were careful to not discuss the immediate future. I began helping him carry his bags to my car. I'm not sure how, but I lost him on one of the elevator rides down. When I returned to the penthouse, I found him squatting on the floor beside the sofa, crying his eyes out.
It was so moving that it made me tear up, but I had to be strong so he could be strong. He couldn't postpone this departure any longer, and I had to be the one who made sure he was in New York tomorrow.
I knelt beside him and said, "I know you love me. I love you! It will be hard for both of us for the next few months, but we have a plan now; we have Spring Break and so much to look forward to. Missing this flight will mess up all those plans. C'mon, we have to get going. I wish I could hold you the whole flight home. We're on a stronger path now."
"I'm so damned proud of you, you know that," he smiled as he got himself to a standing position.
"I love you so much it feels like my heart will burst," he continued.
"I love you, too. We're going to be all right," I hugged him.
He had stopped crying, hugged me tightly, and tenderly kissed my head.
Pete took off at 5:30 that New Year's Day to return home. Deep down, I knew as I waved goodbye that we would be all right.