Disclaimer: This story, though maybe not in this chapter but in subsequent chapters, will have celebrities in it. I have no knowledge of their sexuality and this is not intended to imply their sexuality. This is all from my own mind. Scary!! People actually get a glimpse into my mind!!!
Buffy, the Vampire Slayer, Angel and all related characters created by Joss Whedon. Copyright 20th Century Fox.
Batman, and all related characters created by Bob Kane. Copyright DC Comics and Warner Bros.
X-MEN, and all related characters created by Stan Lee. Copyright Marvel Comics and 20th Century Fox.
Star Trek and all related characters created by Gene Roddenberry. Copyright Paramount Studios.
I don't know for sure if I will use all the above elements, but just in case, I have myself covered.
In this story, which has been floating around in my head most of my life, you will find many universes merging, as the above copyrights reveal. I hope you all enjoy this. I appreciate any feedback that you may want to give. This story doesn't deal so much with sex, sex, sex, but more of my feelings that I struggled with and am starting to come to terms with. Part of his background is mine. I do hope that you enjoy it!!!
jmsotc@yahoo.com
Chapter 14 Taking the Reigns
I awoke with a start on Monday morning. I had dreamt that Ororo and her friend Logan were hunting me down. I ran down an alley only to be caught in a dead end.
"Where are you going, bub?" Logan asked.
"Leave me along."
"You're one of us," replied Ororo. "You must come with us."
"I'm not one of you! Leave me alone!"
"You're coming with us one way or another," Logan said as he approached. Whipping out one set of claws he drove them into my chest...
...And I woke up in a cold sweat. After getting my bearings, I showered and got dressed and went to work.
At work everything seemed normal, at first. Around 10:30 the phone rang and a rather serious voice spoke.
"Hello, Dr. Jenson's line. Can I help you?" I said in my professional voice.
"I need to speak with Dr. Jenson."
"May I ask what this concerns?"
"Just put him on the phone."
"Please hold." I buzzed Josh's office line and told him he had a call. Then went back to work as usual. Fifteen minutes later, however, things became very unusual. Josh came out of his office very pale. "Are you okay, Josh? Is something wrong?"
"Yeah. Something is very wrong. I have to go, now."
"Go where?"
"I just have to...look, I need to speak with Dr. Allison. Take my next client."
My eyes widened. "What?"
"You heard me. Take my next client while I go see Dr. Allison."
"But what do I do?"
"Just listen and take notes. You have psychology classes. Follow your instincts." And he walked to the bank of elevators.
I looked over at Debbie and saw she was looking at me. "What should I do?"
"Do what he says. He wouldn't have put you in charge if he didn't think you could do it."
"But what about the phones?"
"I'll take them. Don't worry."
I got up and went into Dr. Jenson's office. Sitting at his desk, I noticed the next client's file was sitting open. I almost wet myself. It was David Gallagher. "David sees a psychologist? What on earth for?" I skimmed his file only to be interrupted by Debbie.
"Eric, Dr. Jenson's next client is here. And he has someone with him."
"Umm, okay. S-s-sent them in," I replied nervously. "Oh this is beautiful. My first psychological session with a client and, first, I'm not fully prepared, and second, it's David Gallagher."
The door opened and in walked David holding hands with...Michael Cuccione? "Oh, Lord have mercy," I thought, "David is gay and is dating HIM. Well, they do look cute together."
"Hello," I said out loud walking up to them and shaking their hands.
"Hi," David and Michael said shaking my hand. "Where's Josh?"
"He had to run so he asked me to see you guys. I hope that's okay."
The two looked at each other worried. "I guess it's okay," David said. "He must trust you with the sensitive nature of our discussions to ask you to be here in his place. It's fine."
"Please, have a seat," I offered. The two young men sat on the couch and I took a notepad and pen and sat in the chair. "Now what brings you here today?"
"The last time I was here, Josh and I talked about me getting to know other people and being 'out' about my sexuality. I took small steps. It's been hard. Especially since I'm in the public eye because of my job. Michael has been a great support to me. He has shown me how to be comfortable with myself when we are out. We don't show public displays of affection, for obvious reasons. But at times it feels as if we are living two separate lives."
"I understand perfectly what you are saying. I've been there myself."
For the next twenty minutes David and Michael shared with me things that have been going on in their relationship. It was interesting and saddening to hear of all the turmoil that goes on within a celebrity who is gay, especially when their fans believe them to be heterosexual. It is almost like walking a line in which you could be fired just for being out. Of course non-celebrities have that same fear, too, though it is lessening in many areas. Celebrities have it much tougher and my heart goes out to them, truly.
"How comfortable are you with me?" I asked.
"I don't know. Kind of comfortable, I guess?"
"You are very comfortable with him," Michael interjected. "You had a hard time talking with me about your sexuality after you and I hung out for awhile."
"Okay. I guess I'm comfortable with you."
"What about you, Michael. Are you comfortable around me?"
"Yeah."
"How would you two like to work on being expressive out in public?"
"What do you mean?" David's eyes went wide with fear.
"Oh, don't worry. It's nothing major. If you guys are comfortable around me, I would like you two to kiss in front of me."
"What?" they both said in unison as their jaws dropped.
"You two need to get used to being affectionate around people you trust. You've said so yourselves, you don't express your feelings when you are in public and you don't do it around family members. They need to see scenes of affection; I kiss on the cheek, a hug, something that tells them 'yes, homosexuality is about love, not lust'. If they see that you don't show affection to each other, they may think it's just a bedroom activity, that all homosexuality is about is having sex with someone of the same gender. You need to be a role model. But before you can do that, you need to be comfortable with it yourself. I accept you two just the way you are. You don't have to hide from me. Believe me, you don't.
"If you are not comfortable with a kiss, then give each other a hug. You came in here holding hands, which is an excellent start. But let's try and take it one step further."
The two guys looked at each other and I could tell just by the look in their eyes they were considering it. With a cute smile on both of their young faces, they leaned into each other and kissed ever so lightly, then embraced. I grinned from ear to ear knowing that the celluloid closet was being open an inch at a time.
The two guys laughed as they released each other.
"Thanks, Eric," David said shaking my hand. "You were right. We do need to get used to that around people who care about us and we trust."
"It's going to take time. But I'm confident that you guys can do this."
We stood up and shook hands, exchanging pleasantries of meeting for the first time, and I showed them to the door. As I watched them walk down the hall, Joshua came out of the elevator. "Hi, Josh," David said.
"Hi, guys. How are things?"
"Great! Eric was a big help!"
"Good, I'm glad to hear it. Take care." And Josh continued on towards his office and me. "I need to speak to you, Eric." We went in and I sat down on the couch still warm from David and Michael's bodies. Josh shut the door and sat down in the chair I sat in.
"What's going on, Joshua?"
"Eric. Something has come up. I need to leave for a while. I've talked with Dr. Allison and he and I agree. We would like you to continue training in psychology and take on my clients."
"For how long?"
"I'm not sure how long I'll be gone. But we both agree that you've seen most of my clients and they are all comfortable with you. I guess it's the way you make them feel when you talk with them. What do you say?"
"I say...yes! When do I start?"
"I will need to leave tomorrow. All of this week's clientele will be notified by phone as to the change going on. Everyone else will be notified by mail. Since the next class at L.A. University will be starting in a few weeks, Dr. Allison said he would work with the school to get you enrolled. Your patient schedule will be cut back and spread out to the other doctors, but all-in-all, everything will work out."
"Sounds good. What school will I go to?"
"UCLA. Is that okay?"
"Sure is." But I admit I was scared. I always feared new experiences. Even to this day, I do. That's one reason I don't go out much. I guess I'm either paranoid or suffer from severe anxiety disorder. But, now I'm digressing.
Joshua had me sit in on several other cases, just to get a feel for the differences of each patient. It was amazing the different techniques he used and just the different tweaking he did with using the same technique. Dr. Jenson is a very well rounded psychologist. It was amazing to behold.
At the end of the day, I went home with a greater respect for the profession of psychology. It is a very sensitive and delicate field. The wrong diagnosis or treatment can affect the outcome of many lives.
I was delighted to enter my apartment to the phone ringing. It was Justin. "Hi, Justin. How was your day?"
"It was good. It would have been better if you were with me, but I managed." I couldn't help but smile. "So how was your day?"
"Interesting to say the least. I am getting a promotion."
"Promotion? To what?"
"Joshua has been called away. The center wants me to get more training in psychology and take over his office until he returns. They must feel I have a good base of knowledge to build upon."
"That's awesome."
I could tell Justin was happy for me, but some part of him sounded disappointed. "What's wrong, Justin?"
"Nothing."
"No something is wrong. Tell me."
"It's just that with your promotion and schooling, will you have time for me?"
"Always. My training will take place part of my workday. So no time is really taken out of my evenings. I still have time for you."
"Really?" Hope returned to his voice. "What about tonight?"
"I have some place to be tonight for a few hours, but I will stop by after I'm finished."
"Sounds great! See you around 11:00?"
"Sure will."
We said our 'goodbye's and I packed a change of clothes, showered and suited up for my training. On my way, I remembered the urgency in Jessica's voice when we talked on the phone last night. That quickened my pace.
I arrived to find the door unlocked. I knocked but there was no answer. Immediately I became fearful and more concerned than before. Was there some strange demon that was hunting the Huntress and her Watcher? I went inside not knowing what I would find. I made my way down to the training room. There, I found Garrett, alone.
"It's about time you arrived. I was beginning to worry."
"Where's the Huntress?"
"She's gone."
I eyed him closely. "What do you mean 'gone'?"
"She left. By order of the Council." I looked at him puzzled. He obviously knew the look in my eyes. "The Council needs her services back in England."
"Oh. That's right. I watch the TV show. One Slayer dies, another is chosen. Since she's the only Slayer..."
"Actually, that's not true. There are more Slayers than you think. They are scattered throughout the world. If there being only one were the case, the world would definitely be overrun with vampires, for vampires are everywhere."
"Then why is she needed in England?"
"They need her expertise in a certain matter."
"Is that why she was so urgent about me being here? Was she concerned that we would stop training? Or did she want to tell me goodbye?"
"While it's true that she had wished to say 'goodbye', her urgency was not for that reason. She needs you to patrol for her until she gets back."
"You mean be the demon hunter until she returns?"
"Yes. You will patrol every night until..."
"Whoa! Hold on there! I'm not patrolling every night all night. I may do it once in a while for you while she's gone, but I can't do it every night. I have a life. I have a...a..."
"A boyfriend?" I looked at Garrett dumbfounded. "It's okay. Jessica told me you are gay. That's not important to me. I've met several lesbian Slayers and gay Watchers. It's not important your sexuality. What is important is that you can do the job."
"Speaking of that, I wasn't born to do this. I'm not a Slayer. I'm doing this because I want to help. I feel it in me to do this."
"Then, that is your calling. You feel what you need to do because it's your calling. And perhaps you were born to do this. You have taken to my training rather quickly."
"Eagerness to learn."
"You handle yourself well."
"Years of studying bullies...and movies."
"You're looking for an excuse."
"You better believe it." I could tell Garrett wasn't convinced. And my smart-alecky attitude wasn't helping. "Look, Garrett, aren't Slayers supposed to be females?"
"Yes."
"Then why do you think I'm born for this purpose?" I watched Garrett and could see his growing uncomfortable-ness just in his walk. "Don't you dare say because I'm gay. I'm a man, regardless of my sexuality."
"I wasn't going to..."
"Liar." Tension became so thick in the room you could cut it with a steak knife. "Don't give me your 'I'm a civilized man with noble upbringing' English crap. I've met some English people who are more civilized in their thinking than you are."
"You are assuming..."
"Damn right I'm assuming! I can see it in your actions what you think. I've learned long ago how to read people. That's what happens when you're gay and afraid and paranoid. You learn to read people just by their actions, no matter how minute, to see if they are going to be the kind of person who is a bigot or can be trusted. And even though I still have a hard time telling if someone is gay, I can tell if someone is playing it straight with me, and what he or she is thinking about.
"You think you are better than me. Is it because you're straight? Is it because you're English? Is it because you are a Watcher? Or is it because I came to you needing your help in training?"
Garrett said nothing and went about arranging his weapons and training materials. I couldn't tell if he was angry at being found out or angry because I was assuming. I decided to keep quiet and let him make the next move. "You know, it honestly has nothing to do with any of those things. You remind me of my son." That statement alone threw me way off base. He's never seen my face, has trained with me for only four hours and yet still he can say such an intimate thing.
"How so?"
"My son trained to fight demons. He had the heart of a warrior, of nobility and dignity. He was proud of his accomplishments, but never boasted to anyone. He set goals and did what he knew to do to obtain them."
"What makes you think I'm so much like him? We hardly know each other."
"You're right. But Jessica has said much to me. She has told me about your help in the situation with Turic. She has shared with me some of the things you've discussed. From what she's told me, and the excerpts I've read about you in the newspaper, I can see much of my son in you."
"So because I remind you of your son, you think I was born to hunt demons. I'd like to know what your son thinks of this."
"So would I. He's dead."
Right there. The situation changed because of one fact that I didn't know. In his building up of me, he was building up the accomplishments of his son. And I was trying to tear them down. Indirectly, of course, but the fact remains. That's why it's so important to watch what you say to anyone because in your ignorance, you could crush someone's heart. "I'm sorry," I apologized.
"For what? You were being honest. So was I."
"That's why I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, if I did."
"Hmm, well..."
"How did your son die? If you don't mind my asking."
"No. It's all right. A demon killed him. I don't know what kind. He went off to help this poor woman in need and was found dead two weeks later. That's the extent of it."
"What about me remind you of him? Besides the things you've mentioned. You can find others like that. Being in your line of work, I'm sure you have."
"My son was also a gay man. And he, too, wanted to do well for the world and fight against darkness. That's why he became a demon hunter. He didn't want to train with me because he thought I would go too easy on him. He settled on a trainer that I didn't know. He figured most of the one's I knew would follow my fatherly advice and ask them to go easy on him. He would have been right." We both smiled.
Just this moment of opening up to me had changed my whole outlook on Garrett, his actions, his concerns for Jessica and this job, which he didn't look at as a job. He looked at it like a duty, a calling. I respected that in him.
"I was wrong, Garrett," I finally said. "I apologize to you. I was wrong to assume so much."
"Well, you were right about some of it, to an extent. You can read people well. But now you know the main reason why I think you were born for this."
"I've already got a high calling. But, like I said before, I'm willing to help out where and when you and the Huntress need me."
"Good enough."
We spent the rest of the evening talking and training. The training was just as tense, but Garrett wasn't so cold in his urging me to do more. He was more of a confidence builder than anything, encouraging me when I'd failed and reassuring me when I tried again that I could accomplish the task.
The training seemed to fly by. Garrett offered me the use of one of his showers, which I used and I changed and left, Garrett never seeing me without my mask on. As much as I was beginning to trust this guy, I didn't want him to know who I really was, what I really looked like. Like I said, I was BEGINNING to trust him. In time, I knew I would be able to trust him more.
I rushed to the hotel to meet Justin as quickly as I could.
To Be Continued...
So, Eric admits when he's wrong! Doesn't admitting you're wrong mean you are fallible? Of course! But we are human and are prone to make mistakes...in every aspect of life: dating, with our words, with our actions, with our inactions, with our thoughts, ideas and opinions. Being a Christian it was tough to admit that many pastors were wrong in their beliefs of homosexuality. So tough that I thought I was betraying God. After all, they have studied under the most celebrated people who have spent their lives studying the Word of God. They should be in the know. But it all comes back to humanity and humanity's infallibility. Men and women make mistakes. They did in some of the Bible translations and versions. For instance, the word "homosexual" in the Bible has gone through so many translations in so many old versions of the Bible that the direct meaning is almost difficult to know for sure! I would share them with you, but for time and space sake, I will save it for another time. When I wrote this chapter, I did not think I would write this much in notes afterwards. But I guess it's something that needed to be said, if for no one else but me. I'm sure many of you struggled with religion and your sexuality. And I'm sure many of you felt as if you were turning your backs on God when you realized that maybe, just maybe, your minister, priest, rabbi, monk, etc. was wrong. And it was scary. You took the reigns of your own spiritual life and embarked on a journey. Wasn't it exhilarating and reassuring when God proved to you that, no matter your sexuality, He is still with you? It was for me in the many small ways that He proved His presence. Again, that's another story! I hope you enjoyed this chapter. More to come with David and Michael, Joshua and the Huntress. Email me with what you think so far! What you liked or didn't like. I love to hear from readers.
Speaking of Michael Cuccione, as many of you may or may not know he played the youngest member of the boy band "2GETHER" in the MTV series of the same name, and, sadly, he passed away January 13 of respiratory failure (read in from TV Guide, no less). He was diagnosed with a form of cancer and, as a result, started a charitable foundation to aid in research. When I first saw that, my heart broke. Again, I don't know anything of his sexuality, and that doesn't matter. He was a beautiful person both on the outside and inside, and very talented. He will be greatly missed by family and friends and fans. I know I will miss him.