Title: Set Adrift - Second Chances 1 Author: Jezebel the Temptress Feedback: eh_oh_po@yahoo.com
Disclaimers: This is fiction. Ben and Sully are figments of my imagination and The Backstreet Boys are strangers to me and not gay. This has not truth to it. This is for adults only, that's over 18 or 21, depending on your country.
Note: This skips forward in time a little and will move more into fiction as it takes a break from events that happened in reality.
Sully set down their cases with a thud and waited for Alex to shut the door behind them. They were home. At least they were in the place that would be home for the next few weeks. It seemed like forever since they had taken their time out on vacation, in reality it was a few weeks but touring seemed to make the real world disappear, time on tour moved more slowly than elsewhere.
The tour had been long, gruelling and hard for them all but thankfully it was over now and there was some time off. Brian wanted to spend more time with Leighann, who was pregnant, Kevin wanted to spend time with Kristin and Nick and Ben were taking time too. Even Howie, who kept his lovelife very private was off somewhere with that special someone. It seemed only logical that Sully and Alex do the same and be together.
Christmas was nearly upon them, it was a time for family and friends and Sully wondered how Alex would cope with it, this would be his first Christmas with him but also his first without alcohol. Everything about the holiday was geared towards Christmas cheer from the spirits in eggnog to the champagne for New Year. This could potentially be the time that Alex would slip up and Sully wondered if he could be there for him.
There was also the added problem of the troubles in their relationship.
It wasn't anything major, not compared to what they had faced in the past, but there were small cracks in the facade of perfection that they showed to the rest of the small inner circle that knew them. Since Alex had proposed and Sully had refused him there was a slight tension between the pair and the ease of their initial reunion was shadowed by the rejection of Alex's proposal.
Sully didn't know what he could do in order to overcome the troubles but he knew that he had to do something. If he didn't then they might not make the new year together.
Alex hated this. He hated the fact that things between he and his lover were worse than they had been. He should never have proposed but that was his problem always wanting what he couldn't have and never being contented with what he did have.
He had the best mother in the world but most of his childhood had been spent lamenting the fact that there was no father there to play catch with him or to take him to ball games. Now he had Sully, he had the man of his dreams back in his life and he wanted more than that.
He should have known that the loss of Drew was still too fresh for Sully to think about commiting to someone else. He claimed to be this man's best friend and yet he had not seen that really Sully was still grieving for his former lover. Should have was the phrase that fitted the situation. He should have done a lot of things but he had just blundered in without thinking and now he was going to pay.
Still, he deserved everything he got. At least that was what he was telling himself.
Sully would come around eventually, would forgive him for making his mistake, at least he hoped so. Alex couldn't even begin to contemplate a life without Sully. Not again. Not now that he had him back in his life.
No, he had a second chance and he had just made one mistake. It was not one that he would be repeating.
The cases still sat in the hall where Sully had left them, it was part of the unspoken question of where he was going to stay. Last time they were in Orlando he had been staying with Nick, he had never been into Alex's home to stay, at least not since they were teenagers and back then it was never this house. Now that they were lovers he supposed that he should be staying in Alex's room, in Alex's bed, but they hadn't made love in a while and he wondered if it was appropriate for him to be intimate with Alex while they were still on rocky ground.
So, the cases still sat in the hall and neither of them spoke about the reason that they were still there.
They acted like a married couple would after they have been together for years, not happy exactly but drifting, as if they would be lost without each other but weren't really sure if they were right for each other anymore. Given the reason that they had gotten into this situation, with the proposal and all, it was probably a bad analogy but Sully could not help but think it.
"Alex?" He asked as they sat watching television later that evening.
"Yeah?" Alex replied.
Sully wondered when they had reverted to single worded statements.
"I love you." Sully said, feeling a need to say the words. He didn't know why but they were burning inside him and he felt that they had to be said.
"Love you too." Alex replied, not really looking away from the television. Sully frowned slightly, they really were like an old married couple.
Moving slowly across the sofa he reached down and fingered Alex's fly. He undid the button first before sliding the zipper down. Alex continued to watch the television, almost as if he didn't notice, so Sully reached over and took the remote, turning the volume down just enough to get his lover's attention. Then he pulled out his prize.
Alex was only really half-hard, surprising since it had been a while since either of them had done more than sleep in the bed that they shared, but as soon as Sully began to stroke him he grew harder. Encouraged by this reaction Sully doubled his efforts, leaning down to give his complete attention to Alex. He kissed his head, before taking it all in his mouth, suckling gently as his tongue began to work Alex's slit. This was familiar, he knew what Alex liked and just how to suck his cock. Familiar was good, familiar meant that he knew all of the hot spots and how to get the preferred reaction from his lover. Familiar did not have to mean that they were staid or boring. It didn't mean that they were old and married yet.
"Oh God." Alex said as he felt the heat surrounding his cock. It felt good, warm and wet and just as he had remembered. It had been too long and part of him didn't even care if this was just guilty sex or pity sex because he was getting it. He loved Sully and knew that he was loved too, this was just another way of them showing each other that. "Yeah, there. Right there."
As Sully continued his efforts, licking, lapping, sucking and swallowing his lover he was glad that he could still do this one thing to show Alex that he was wanted. There may be no words between them, but he still had his actions, and as the phrase said they often spoke louder. Sully hoped that this gesture could tell his lover all of the things that he couldn't say. If nothing else it would rekindle some of the spark that they shared.
Alex came in long spurts, proving that he had not gotten any in a while. Sully swallowed it all as he would have done before all of this happened, he loved to taste Alex and wanted to savour this part of him. It could be a while before he got the chance again if Alex's barriers went back up.
"Do you want me to take care of you?" Alex asked.
Sully blushed slightly, he hadn't really thought about his own pleasure, he had been too intent on getting Alex off. That was all he had really wanted. Was it selfish to tell his lover that this was enough for him?
"I kind of already did." Sully replied.
He really didn't want to tell Alex that he had come in his pants like a schoolboy over sucking off a Backstreet Boy. It just didn't sound right.
Alex smirked. Well, at least, if nothing else, Sully still wanted him for his body.
And as the pair headed up to bed neither one of them moved the cases that sat at the bottom of the stairs. It would be too presumptuous for either of them to place the cases in one place or another and even though Sully followed Alex to his room that night it did not mean that he would stay in there for the duration.
They had made a small step, but something niggled in the back of Sully's mind and told him that there was still a long way to go.
When Sully woke the next morning he was alone in Alex's bed. He had never really known his friend to be an early riser but there may be some other reason to it. Sully wondered if Alex was regretting what they had done last night. His fears were just beginning to take root when he heard a clatter from downstairs and decided to go and investigate.
Alex was in the kitchen, aparently searching for something edible in the stainless steel monstrousity that he called a fridge. On the counter there was already a stack of frozen waffles that were slowly thawing.
"I take it that Denise usually makes breakfast." Sully joked as he watched Alex.
His lover's head peered out at him, looking around the refrigerator door and Sully laughed. It was obvious from the frown that Alex was giving him just how true that was.
"Mom doesn't do everything for me." Alex replied belatedly. "She stayed here a lot before, when I was..." He trailed off, not wanting to say when he was drunk, but also not wanting to admit that it had been when he wasn't able to look after himself. Those were painful times and neither of them really needed a reminder about it, especially not after they were just getting things back on track.
"You always were close." Sully agreed, changing the subject much to Alex's relief. "Do you want a hand?" He added.
"You never used to be able to cook." Alex replied. "Why should I trust you now?"
"I learned a bit while I was away." Sully replied. "Drew only really knew how to order take away so if I wanted food that didn't come in a carton I had to learn how to cook. I'm no Martha Stewart but I do know a few things."
Alex smiled as Sully moved into the kitchen and started organising things as if he owned the place. Rather than being put out Alex was actually relieved. He had been planning a nice breakfast in bed, at least until he realised that he was barely able to pour cereal, let alone cook a meal from scratch. It was just as nice for them to share the preparations and the meal afterwards. Sully seemed to belong in this Kitchen and it felt right them being there. Almost as if they were domesticated.
There was a time when AJ would have run from anything as commited as even having someone stay overnight, he had not wanted to get his heart broken again, but now he didn't mind that Sully was there. It was nice to wake up next to his lover and do the simple things together and he hoped that there would be plenty more mornings together and that they could continue to live together in this way.
Maybe he had been wrong to propose, maybe this was all that they needed. It wasn't as permanent as a marriage would be, and part of Alex wanted that permanence, but he was just glad of what he had now. There was a time when he had never even thought that he would have this much.
"Alex, pass the syrup." Sully said and Alex realised that he had been so lost in thought that he had nearly missed Sully serving up breakfast.
He handed over the syrup, watching as Sully drizzled it liberally across two sets of Waffles, and then took the plate that was handed to him. The pair ate in companionable silence, just enjoying being together and Alex hoped again that there would be many more mornings just like this one.
To Be Continued.
Notes: Sorry for the delay, I've had far too little time and far too much of a block on what to write. I hope that it will be more regular now.