Second Chance

Second Chance Chapter 6 - The Birthday Party

Tom and I arrived at the party venue just a few blocks from my apartment about a quarter past 7:00. The restaurant and bar Big Chicks is divided into two parts, a traditional restaurant on the side where the entrance is and an area that is more of a bar on the other side. Although lots of LGBTQ folk live in Uptown, Big Chicks was one of the only gay-identified spaces in our neighborhood. While its proximity to our condo was part of the reason that Pablo and I had often gone to Big Chicks so often, we also really appreciated the vibe. The place was unpretentious, the food was good, and we really liked the owner. It was that friendship with the owner, Lucy -- along with a lot of money from Karen -- that allowed us to rent half of the restaurant for the night, since the space was not normally available for rentals. We had rented the bar side for the evening, while the other half, the restaurant side, was still open to the public.

When we arrived, the restaurant side was completely full of diners. They looked at us curiously as we made our way toward the bar side. My friend, Andy, saw us approaching and came running to greet us and threw his arms around me.

"Happy birthday!" he cried.

He then led us past a sign that had been put up that said, "Private Event," to block off the bar side.

In the bar section, the stools had been pushed up against the opposite wall so that people could access the bar, which was spread with food. There was a bouquet of balloons on one cocktail table and a couple of banners that said Happy Birthday, one behind the bar, the other on the back wall.

I saw that there were already a number of people at the party. A few friends were sitting on the stools or standing around in small groups, while others were already digging into the food. In addition to Andy and his partner Steve, a few of my church friends were there, and Margarita, Pablo's former associate, was talking to some people from my work. Karen was standing in the back, surveying the scene to make sure that everything was in place. Tom and I went to stand beside her. Tom gave her a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek, then he headed over to the bar to get a drink.

Karen looked particularly beautiful tonight. She was wearing a bright red dress that hugged tightly around her hips, and she had her hair down. The contrast between her dark hair and her pale skin was always stunning. "Black Irish," she always called herself.

"People are slow in arriving," she said, by way of greeting.

"Well, no one wants to be first."

She harrumphed in response, a typical Karen reaction. "It's rude to be late." She tossed her hair to one side in a dramatic gesture. I knew that this was one of the reasons she sometimes liked to wear her hair down, so that she could toss it around from one side to the other.

"They'll come, honey. I've been hearing from people all day."

As I said that, a flood of folks came pouring in all at once -- My sister Elizabeth and her husband, Larry, Langston and Dave, my paralegal Stephanie, and a couple of more colleagues from work. We had told people strictly no gifts, but Langston and Dave had brought a vase of lovely flowers, which they set on the bar.

Steve came over with Andy.

"Happy birthday, Judah," he said and gave me a hug.

"You REALLY don't look like you're 65," Andy said. "You have still got it!" His effusiveness made me smile. He was always a little over the top in a way that made me laugh. Andy was at least a decade younger than me, and he still had a youthfulness about him.

"Thanks for helping Karen plan the evening," I told them.

"Well," Steve said, "Obviously it was more Andy than me. But I'm glad that we could chip in at least a little."

Since Steve had gone to high school with Pablo, he was five years older than me, so around 70. I noticed that he was looking more and more his age. I knew that he had gone through hip surgery six months ago, and he was still walking with a cane. I reflected for a moment on how Pablo might be now, at the same age. If he hadn't had cancer, would he have been facing other ailments? Or would he have remained vigorous and athletic as he'd always been?

I chatted with Steve and Andy a bit more and then started to make my way around the room to greet other people. Tom was talking with Elizabeth and Larry, whom he had met many times. I saw that Carl had arrived with a date I didn't recognize. A couple of more guys from church showed up. Pablo's sister Rosa came in with a friend, and I rushed up to hug her.

"It's so good to see you, sis," I said. "It's been too long."

"Happy birthday, brother," she said. "It HAS been too long."

She indicated the woman who had come in with her. "This is my friend, Louisa. Louisa, this is my brother's husband, Judah."

We shook hands. "Encantado," I said.

"Hablas Español!" she said. You speak Spanish!

"Yo trato. Entiendo un poco," I responded. I try. I understand a little.

Rosa laughed and told her that I had lived in Costa Rica for a couple of years and that, in fact, my Spanish was excellent.

I chatted with them for a while, jumping back and forth between English and Spanish. I had a chance to catch up on what Rosa had been up to and how her three kids were doing. I was so glad that Rosa and Pablo had reconciled a few years after we'd started dating, because the rest of his family had completely abandoned him, something he didn't talk about much, but which I knew hurt him deeply. Pablo's mother had called a couple of times early on to ask if he had reconsidered and would repent his sinful lifestyle, but that had stopped many years ago, after he told her that she was being a terrible mother. After that, all of his family but Rosa acted like he didn't exist. They didn't even attend his funeral. I knew that Rosa still had at least some relationship with her family, but I didn't ask after them, and she knew better than to tell me. To let their son die without ever reaching out was simply unforgivable to me.

Rosa herself had sought out her brother a few years after he and I had started dating, because her own experience led her to reconsider her family's lack of charity. Her husband was verbally abusive and would hit her when he got drunk. When he raised a hand against one of the children, she decided that it was time to leave, but her family tried to convince her to stay. A woman should be obedient to her husband and divorce was sinful, they told her. Her family did not disown her, but they judged her harshly and distanced themselves from her when she got divorced. She came to realize that they had treated Pablo the same way. She felt ashamed at her own behavior toward him and wrote to Pablo to apologize and ask his forgiveness. As soon as he got the letter, he called her, and they met the next day. There were tears and hugs and lots of catching up, and over the years, Rosa and Pablo had become very close.

"The kids send their love," she said.

Pablo had been like a second father to her three children, since their father largely disappeared after the divorce. The oldest, Felipe, had struggled some, getting arrested for fighting once in his late teens, but he had sorted out his life, gotten married, and worked for a landscaping firm in the suburbs. The middle son, Jose, had gone to college for a business degree and worked in a bank. He had never married, and Rosa had talked with Pablo and me about her suspicions that he was gay, but he had never come out to her. The youngest was a girl, Juanita. She was sweet but a bit fragile. She had been married but divorced and was now living with Rosa along with her own daughter. I realized that I had not seen any of the kids since Julio's funeral three years ago.

"Oh!" she said. "Jose finally has a boyfriend. We were right about him all along. He's still quiet about it, because... well, you know... my family and all. But I've met the young man, and he's a very nice guy."

"I should really have you and all the kids over sometime. You will always be my family," I told her and kissed her cheek, before I moved on to speak with other friends.

As I was making my way through the growing crowd, a drink appeared in my hand. I saw that Tom had handed me a negroni.

"You should get something to eat, dear," he said, and grabbed my elbow to lead me over to the buffet on the bar. There was a fantastic array of finger foods laid out - arepas and tamales, crab cakes, miniature quiches, and sliders. As I was filling a plate with a taste of everything, the owner, Lucy, came by to check in.

"How is everything, Judah?" she asked.

"It's all lovely," I told her. "Thank you so much for letting us take over your space."

She gave me a cautious hug, trying to keep me from spilling the plate I had in one hand.

"It's my pleasure," she said. "And happy birthday!"

Two of my favorite bartenders were fixing drinks for my friends. They smiled at me and said hello and wished me a happy birthday.

When I turned around, Susan and Julio were there to greet me. I had not seen them come in.

I set my plate on the bar, and Susan hugged me briefly. "Happy birthday, Uncle Judah," she said.

Julio hugged me as well. "Happy birthday," he said. HIs was a long hug, and he gave me a final tight squeeze before releasing. Holding my hands in his, he looked me square in the eye. "Thank you so much for letting me come."

"I'm glad you're here!" I said. "I hope all of my old friends aren't too boring for you."

He held onto my hands for a moment longer, then let go of them. Julio was wearing a pair of tan skinny jeans that clung tightly to his body and a loose short-sleeve maroon polo shirt. He looked strikingly handsome.

"Come on, Julio, let me introduce you to my parents," Susan said and led him across the room. As he walked away, he looked over his shoulder and smiled at me. Although I'm not much of an ass man, I could really appreciate how nice his ass looked in those jeans as he walked away.

Just then, Tom sidled up next to me.

"So that's Julio?" he asked. "He is indeed yummy!"

"And very young," I retorted.

"And that is a problem because...?" He winked at me, and I just rolled my eyes in response.

"AND he is NOT interested in me in that way," I added.

"Hmmm," Tom said skeptically. "We'll see. That was a long hug."

As I stood at the bar, nibbling on my plate of food and sipping my negroni, more people continued to arrive.

Around 8:30, with the buffet largely depleted and everyone there who was planning to come, Karen tapped on a glass with a spoon, and the room fell silent. She and Andy were standing in the middle of the room, just over from my post at the bar.

"As you all know," Andy started, "We are here to celebrate the life of Judah Ellis."

"Sounds like a funeral!" someone called out to general laughter. Andy glared at the crowd in a way that challenged anyone else to interrupt.

"AS I was saying," Andy continued, "we are here to celebrate Judah who is turning 29 tomorrow. For the thirtieth time." There was a little laughter. "Judah has been a great friend to all of us, and we are happy to have this opportunity to let him know how special he is."

"Plus," Karen broke in, "It's a good excuse to drink a lot and eat some great food."

"In that spirit," Andy continued, "everyone please raise a glass." He raised his cocktail glass high in the air, and most in the crowd followed suit. "To Judah!" he shouted.

"To Judah!" the crowd responded.

"Speech! Speech!" someone called, and a few others joined in. "Speech! Speech!"

With a slight push from someone , I stepped out from the bar and turned to the crowd.

"Thank you everyone! I just want to thank you all for showing up. It means a lot to me. Special thanks to Karen and Andy and Steve for organizing this. I've been thinking a lot lately about how rich my life has been. There have been some tough times." I started to choke up for a moment as I thought about Pablo. His absence was suddenly overpowering. I took a deep breath so that I could continue. "But you all have been there for me, and I couldn't ask for a better community."

I raised my own glass again. "To friends and family!"

"To friends and family!" people repeated. There was a round of solid applause.

Our friend Carl came around the corner from the restaurant carrying a cake with a single candle burning on it, and the crowd started a round of "Happy Birthday." Carl set the cake down on the counter in front of me. It was a gorgeous cake that Carl told me later had been ordered from a private pastry chef. It had smooth pale green frosting with blue and yellow flowers wrapping around the sides and onto the top. It looked more like a work of art than something you could eat.

"Make a wish!" someone shouted. I paused for a second while I thought of a wish: May my life continue to surprise me. Then I blew the candle out.

Karen shouted out. "Enough formalities! Get a slice of cake! Eat! Drink! Enjoy yourselves!"

A waitress who had followed Carl in cut carefully into the cake and handed me the first slice. I set the slice down and gave Karen and Andy and Carl each a hug and thanked them for the party. Then I turned back to the bar to order another negroni and ate my cake while the bartender made the drink. When I turned back around, Julio was standing there.

"What are you drinking?" I asked him, because I saw that his glass was almost empty.

"Gin and tonic," he said.

I turned to one of the bartenders and ordered for Julio. When his drink came, I said, "Hey Julio, let me introduce you to a few of the lawyers here. They might be good connections for you."

I walked him a little way across the room to where a small group of my colleagues was standing.

I introduced him first to Stephanie. "This is Stephanie, my right hand man. Or woman. Whatever. She does all the real work. Stephanie, this is Julio, he just finished law school and is starting work in Chicago." Stephanie shook Julio's hand while clearly giving him a once over.

"Nice to meet you," she said.

"Stephanie just finished her undergraduate degree not too long ago and is planning to go to law school in a few years. She will make a fabulous lawyer," I said.

She nodded her head modestly but smiled. She had pulled her braids up onto the top of her head and wrapped them in a bright cloth, and she was wearing a short dress in the same fabric, which had an African motif. She looked really good as always.

"Nice to meet you," he said.

"Julia?" Joyce, the woman next to Stephanie, inquired.

"Juli-O" he responded. "J-U-L-I-O."

"Not Hulio?" she said, pronouncing the name in the Spanish way.

"No," he said. "Julio, with a hard J. It's Portuguese, not Spanish."

"And this," I said, indicating her, "Is Joyce, one of our newer associates."

They shook hands, then I introduced Julio to Daniel, another young lawyer, and Gina, one of our senior lawyers. They asked a few questions about the job that he was taking up next week, then I excused him and walked him over to a group of my church friends and introduced him.

"Anderson here," I said, indicating one of them, "Is a lawyer in one of Chicago's top law firms." I explained Julio's reasons for moving to Chicago and left him to talk a little about his job.

While Julio was talking with them, I walked across the room to where Karen was chatting with a couple of the guests.

"Karen, this is so much fun," I said. "Thank you again."

"Anything for my Judah," she said, with a side hug.

"So that's the boy, huh?" she whispered, indicating Julio with her glass.

"Julio, yes. I'm trying to introduce him to a few of the lawyers here. Though since he'll be working in the corporate world, I'm not sure how useful it is."

"Always useful to make connections," she said. "He's gorgeous, by the way."

I had a lovely evening chatting with friends and colleagues. I tried to make a point to spend at least a little time speaking with each person, since they had each come for my birthday. Karen had reserved the space from 7 until 10, when the bar would return to its usual Saturday night designation as a dance floor. Guests started to leave the party around 9:30, mostly the straight folks first. By ten, more than half of the guests had left, most coming to say goodnight to me and to excuse themselves before slipping out.

Dave and Langston each gave me a big hug. "Got to go rescue the babysitter," Langston said. I thanked them for coming.

"Got to get back to the burbs," Larry said as he and Elizabeth left.

Right at ten, Lucy came up to me. "We're going to open up the dance floor now, if that's okay," she said.

"Of course," I told her. She took down the sign designating a private event, and she and one of the bartenders moved the stools back in front of the bar, but no one came immediately in. 10 p.m. was very early for a gay bar anyway. The volume of the music was turned up, and the lights dimmed a little. A few people eventually wandered in from the other side and ordered drinks. I saw that Tom was flirting with one of the bartenders. A little while later, a group of young gay guys came in and started dancing, and one of the gay couples from church started dancing too. Steve and Andy and Carl and his date, whom I had learned was named Howard, all moved to the dance floor together.

Karen came up a few minutes later and gave her regrets. "I'm going to head downtown now," she said. "I hope you had a good time."

"I did," I told her and gave her a long hug. "I had a wonderful time! It was great to see everyone. Thank you. Inside that gruff exterior, you definitely have a heart of gold."

"Yeah, whatever," she said, but she smiled.

Susan was next, coming to give me a quick hug. "Julio wants to stay, but I'm done for the night. Too late for me." She indicated Julio out on the dance floor. "Help him get an Uber home. He's been drinking a bit."

Then it was just the gay guys left. Tom pulled me out onto the dance floor and got me moving. The bar was filling up, and the floor was starting to get crowded. The bar was a narrow space, not really ideal for dancing, but that made it cozy. It had the intimate feel of a small town club. Tom started dancing with a few of the cute younger guys. Julio was dancing with someone on the other side of the floor. I just moved with the music for a while by myself, and then Tom was back, smiling at me.

"Good to see you loosen up," he said, having to shout over the music.

Julio came up to Tom and me. He was dancing, but with a cocktail in his hand. His eyes were bloodshot, and he was a little unsteady on his feet.

"This has been so much fun!" he shouted over the music, his words slurred. "I met so many people! You have such great friends!"

"Glad you had fun," I said.

He stumbled again, and I reached to take the drink out of his hand and set it on the shelf along the wall.

He started dancing close to me, then he moved behind me. He sandwiched me between him and Tom, Julio pressing up against me from behind and Tom dancing close to me on the front. They were both gyrating against me suggestively, with Julio pressing his crotch up against my ass. Since he was taller than me, he squatted down a little so that his groin was pressing on me, and I could swear that I could feel his hardness. He reached his arms forward, so that he was embracing me and Tom both.

"You're so sexy," he whispered in my ear. "Your ass feels so good." He pressed against me, and I could definitely feel his hard cock pressing into me now.

The song changed and Tom stepped back, so that our sandwich broke apart. I turned around to face Julio, and he stepped back up to dance close to me, pressing himself into me. He reached behind and cupped my ass in his hands and pulled me to him.

"You're such a sexy daddy," he said in my ear.

"Julio, you've been drinking," I said.

"I know," he said, "I feel good." He stumbled a little and almost fell. I grabbed him to steady him.

"Let's find you a seat," I said. Tom grabbed one elbow, and I took the other, and we led him off the dance floor and around the corner to the restaurant section. We dropped him into a chair at one of the tables.

"How many gin and tonics have you had, dear?" Tom inquired.

"Four? Maybe five?" he said. "And a couple of shots." He drooped down and lay his head on his arms on the table.

"Oh dear," Tom said. "We should probably get you home."

"We should just bring him back to our place," I told Tom. "I don't think we can send him in a car and expect that he'll get in safely."

"Okay, agreed" Tom said, "We should get going though. I think he might pass out."

I shook Julio's shoulder. "Julio, let's take you home. You can come sleep on my couch."

Tom went back in and grabbed the flower arrangement off of the bar, which I had forgotten about, then we headed out the front door.

I put my arm around Julio to try to steady him.

"You're taking me home?" he asked, with a smile.

"I'm taking you home to put you on the couch for you to sleep it off," I said sternly. "You're quite drunk."

"You're taking me home," he repeated.

"Well," said Tom, "I think the question of whether or not he likes you has been settled."

I glared at him.

Suddenly Julio stopped.

"I don't feel well," he said, and I could tell that he was about to throw up. I moved him over to the edge of the sidewalk, where there was a strip of grass. He bent over and heaved onto the grass.

"Charming," Tom said.

Julio stayed bent over for a few moments while he caught his breath. I helped him back up, and we walked a few steps, then he turned, bent over, and threw up some more, this time on the sidewalk.

"Okay, Julio," I said. "Get it all out."

He recovered, and we continued on our way, but we had to stop one more time as he had the dry heaves.

We got to our apartment, which seemed to take forever, and I helped him make his way up the stairs, while Tom unlocked the apartment door. I led Julio over to the couch to sit down. I had a third bedroom, but it was set up as an office, and there was nothing to sleep on, so the couch would have to do.

"You get his shoes off, and I'll get a glass of water," Tom called as he headed into the kitchen, setting down the vase of flowers on the dining room table as he passed.

Julio had landed heavily on the couch and immediately seemed to be nodding off. I squatted down to take off his trainers. I tried to slip them off but realized that I had to untie them. As I was pulling the first one off, Tom shook Julio awake and handed him a glass of water.

"Here," he said, "Drink this."

Julio dutifully drank the glass of water as Tom held it for him, never opening his eyes, while I took off his second shoe. I stood up, and we eased him down to lay on the couch. I went to grab a pillow and a blanket out of the closet, then brought them back, raised his head and slid the pillow under. Then I draped the blanket across him.

"This would be adorable if it weren't so annoying," Tom said, looking down at him. "I'm too old to be dealing with frat boys."

"He's isn't a frat boy," I said. "He's in his thirties." I reached down and gently touched his face.

Tom looked at me. "So what are you going to do?"

"About what?" I asked.

"About the fact that he clearly has a bad crush on you? That's obviously why he got drunk tonight."

I sighed.

"Well, for now, I'm going to go to bed. It's almost midnight. I guess I'll figure it out in the morning."

"Hmmm," was all Tom said as he headed into his room.

I turned out the lights in the living room and went into my own room. I stripped out of my party clothes and put on a pair of boxer shorts to sleep in. I brushed my teeth, used the toilet, then climbed into my bed, and within a few moments, I was fast asleep.

At some point in the night, I was awakened as I felt someone climbing into the bed with me. It was Julio.

"Julio," I said. "What's up?"

He didn't respond and instead just crawled up against me and pulled me to him, so that we were spooning. I could feel that he was just in his underwear now as his smooth bare chest pushed up against my back.

"Julio," I said.

He wrapped his arms around me to hold me tight. I lay there for a moment, not sure what to do. I said his name one more time, but then I could hear by his steady breathing that he had fallen back to sleep.

I stopped resisting and pulled the covers over both of us. I relaxed and let myself melt into him. It had been so long since I had lain with someone like this, and it felt so nice.

Within a few minutes, I drifted back to sleep again, feeling quite content.

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