"Is it "fuck a cold, suck a flu" or is it the other way `round?" I asked.
"You're hilaaarious", droned Aden dryly from the floor in front of the TV where he was going over his notes from class. "And you're sick. Aren't you supposed to be in bed drinking tea or something instead of in here, watching porn and asking stupid questions."
"Well, I'm BORED," I said reaching for the box of tissues, "and HORNY. And I'm mostly better now, it's just this stupid nagging cough and a faucet for a nose that I can't turn off."
"Don't look at me!," snipped Aden, "I don't want to get what you've got."
"News flash, you stupid jock, you've been stuck in here with me for the past week so if you were gonna catch it you would have by now." Actually, I wasn't entirely sure that was true, but my cock was doing the talking. "Now come over here and suck me off like a good roomie."
"Uh, news flash for YOU, you arrogant prick. It's not exactly sexy to go down on someone who keeps coughing and blowing his nose every 10 seconds. No matter HOW big your cock... hey, what are you doing?"
I was, in fact, simultaneously blowing my nose and humping a couch pillow.
"That's not machine washable you know," he scolded.
"I can't help it! It's your fault for not servicing me like I said! Now put on some headphones to drown out the nose blowing and get over here" I said, having pulled my cock out of my sweatpants and thwacking it against my palm menacingly.
Aden considered my argument thoughtfully for a second or two, then as always, powerless to resist my "thickness" as he called it, he began crawling over to me. "Well, how bout I get you off with my hands so as to avoid ingesting your pathogens." (Aden was the sort of dumb jock that likes people to know he's in pre-med).
"Fine, sure, whatever," I answered, knowing that eventually my cock was going down to Deep Throat Town. That boy was as powerless to resist throating my meat as he was at ignoring his gag reflex. It's how we met actually, funny story, I'll tell you later.
In any case, Aden had taken his place kneeling before me on the couch. "So what do you want me to do for you, Mr. Outbreak?," he asked sweetly, tugging my sweatpants down and off. "Better tell me now before I tune you out." He pulled his headphones out of his pocket, stuck them in his ears then started fiddling with his phone.
"Surprise me," I said, spreading my legs and laying back on the couch, "just make it last. I've got at least a week of cum built up and I wanna enjoy it." My fat meat was bobbing in the air at this point, seeming to nod in agreement.
Surprise me, he did. I don't know how he thought of all the things he came up with. No dumb jock, this guy! He started by holding my cock really tightly with one hand down by the base, then drooling onto the head and using his fingers on the other hand to gently stroke and swirl around the exposed part of my cock. Almost simulating a blow job but with his fingers, it was maddening.
A bottle of lube had appeared from out of nowhere by this point and he took time to thoroughly coat my meat and his hands, never mind worrying about staining the couch or his precious pillows by this point.
Then he thwacked my cock against the palm of his hand several times really hard - splatting lube in every direction - before rubbing his palm in circles against the underside slowly and firmly.
It went on like this for I don't know how long, sometimes rolling my cock between his hands like he was trying to make it catch fire, sometimes slow, long stroking from tip to base, sometimes hard, fast rabbit punch strokes that made me gasp, alternating attention between the head and the shaft, pulling on the balls. My favorite was when he pulled hard on my balls with one hand while giving me tight gripped, slow, long strokes.
I was seeing stars and gasping for breath when suddenly he stopped.
"The FUCK!," I yelled, outraged.
"Hang on a sec, you idiot," he said, pulling off his t-shirt and reaching for a bottle of poppers on the coffee table (was that there the whole time?). "Here make yourself useful," he said, handing me the poppers, "my hands are slippery."
I dutifully twisted open the bottle (A new bottle! Did he buy it today?!), took a big sniff in my one good nostril, and handed it down to him. As I did so, I realized he had used his t-shirt to dry all the lube off my cock and balls for some reason. I was about to ask him why, when he took a big sniff of poppers, set the bottle aside and proceeded to ingest all 9 fat inches of my meat in one swallow.
I don't know how I lasted as long as I did with the poppers kicking in right then, as my cock was bathed in the tight squeezing wetness of Aden's throat. He stayed down there a good ten seconds before coming up and starting in on the old up and down, keeping me on the edge for at least five minutes, somehow knowing just when to slow down or stop to keep me from popping.
"Aden PLEASE," I begged, "I need to COME!" He just looked up at me with his mouth full of my cock, eyes seeming to laugh, and shook his head. "Come ON now, please!"
He pulled off for a second, panting and grinning. "Shut up, I'm working!" He took another hit of poppers, handed me the bottle and went back to town.
I knew what that meant, he was ready for my come. He knows I can't last past a second hit of poppers. I took another deep inhale ("this is probably good for my congestion", I thought), and suddenly I knew it was all over. The heat, the wetness, the tightness of his mouth and throat, the relentless suction, him pulling mercilessly on my ballsack, and then I couldn't help it any more, I sat up and pushed him to the floor with my meat still snaking down his throat and with both hands behind his head started face fucking him to oblivion. OH GOD I'M COMING!! I heard someone yelling on an on, then realized it was me. I felt like I blasted my liver out of my cock, I was so drained.
Aden sat up with his cheeks comically ballooned out, like a chipmunk.
He spit some of my come out into his hand and held it out to me.
"Eat it. It's good for you, best thing for a cold! It's in all the medical books."
Well, he would know, wouldn't he? So I licked all of that spooge out of his hand like a good boy. First time I ever did that. At the time, I still thought of myself as basically straight, but open to enjoying the convenience of a cock hungry roommate.
"Know something funny," he asked, wiping his face. "You didn't cough or blow your nose the whole time I was doing ya."
"I didn't, did I!" I agreed, as I sat back, leaving my glistening cock out for display. "So maybe it really IS `suck a cold, fuck a flu'".
"Or," suggested Aden, "it's `suck a cold, and fuck you!"
"Fuck YOU, faggot!" I laughed. But my cock wasn't laughing. It was starting to stand up again. Unsatisfied as ever. Aden gave it a serious look.
"Sure, okay, if you want to," he said. We hadn't gone that far before. "I mean, if it'll make you feel better. What kind of roomie would I be if I didn't use all of my medical knowledge to help out a friend."
Medical knowledge my ass. No, his ass. And yes, I had given it some thought before, but it seemed my cock had already made the decision for me.
"Well get your fucking pants off and hand me the fucking lube already!"
I figured, in for a penny, in for a pound, and was he in for a pounding alright. He had a small, round ass I couldn't stop thinking about. I was already imagining sinking my cock into it and jackhammering away. "I'm gonna get well if it takes me all night and wrecks both of his holes, dammit!"