Warnings and Disclaimers: See chapter one
A/N: Sorry to have neglected these brothers but as some of you know, other brothers have been occupying my time.
Matt was fourteen when his father died. He had been there in the stands with his mom and Andy and watched in horror as his dad's bike skidded and hit the wall, sending his father flying then crash landing on the asphalt. It was a memory that haunted him even in his dreams, and now with Joe's first race just days away, it was all he could think about.
He stopped going to the track for practice. He wasn't officially part of Joe's team but was allowed to hang out with them. He was learning a lot and Joe seemed to be proud of how well he was fitting in. The summer was shaping up pretty good after all. His mom still wasn't talking to him but she did check in with Joe to see how he was doing. Matt thought that had to count for something. Plus, she let him speak to Andy. They stayed in a cheap motel not far from the racetrack. To Matt it felt like home. He'd even gotten a part time job in a fast food restaurant and was able to not only contribute to their stay, but provide dinner as well.
Because the part of town they were staying in wasn't exactly an upscale area, Joe picked him up from work when he got off late. They'd eat, make love if Joe wasn't too tired and sleep comfortably wrapped in each other's arms. It was two days before the race when Joe finally broached the subject with Matt.
Matt had just finished making love to Joe, something the older brother never got tired of. He also was well aware outside of a few occasions that Matt topping him meant his little brother was troubled about something concerning him. It was Matt's way of controlling the situation and reclaiming him. Joe had a feeling he knew what that something was, but he needed Matt to say it.
"You planning on being at my race tomorrow?" Joe was spooned behind his brother, one arm wrapped around his waist, holding him close.
"I thought maybe I could pick up some extra hours over the weekend. You know, earn my keep while you baby-sit me."
"I'm not babysitting you. Is that why you've been staying away?"
Matt rolled over in his arms and cupped his older brother's cheek. "Do you ever get scared?"
Joe reached over his younger brother and turned on the light. "Hey," he gave Matt a light peck on the nose, "what's this all about. Scared of what, us getting caught?"
"That too. I mean, it is why you tried to break up with me, isn't it."
Matt searched his brother's face, looking for the truth.
"Yeah," Joe said regretfully, "it was and I promise I'll never do that again. You're stuck with me until you want out."
"Or until one of us is not around anymore." Matt rolled closer to his brother, resting his head against his chest.
"Hey, Mattie, you're not crying are you?"
Matt shook his head against his brother's chest.
"Because if something is worrying you, if you're afraid I'm going to leave you, I swear, I'm not."
"What if you have no control over whether you leave?" Matt asked miserably.
"How could I not have control over a decision like that Mattie? Look at me?" Joe pulled the teen out of his hiding place by his chin and was met with red tear swollen eyes. "Matt, talk to me. What's bothering you?"
"Things have been so good this summer. We have all the time in the world to be together. I just keep thinking about all the times before, when something went wrong every time and I just wonder what's going to happen to ruin all this."
"Like something happening to me tomorrow?" Joe asked. He lay flat on his back pulling his young lover between his legs and holding his face in his hands. "Listen to me, nothing bad is going to happen tomorrow. The worst thing that could happen is if I win that race and you're not there by my side." He pulled Matt down and kissed him softly.
"I was there when dad died," Matt answered quietly.
"Oh sweetie, is that what this is about? C'mere." Joe rolled over to his side pulling his brother with him so they could face each other. "I promise you that as bad as I want to win, I want even more to celebrate that victory with you. I know you're afraid something terrible will ruin what we've had so far. I'd be lying if I told you the thought hadn't crossed my mind as well, but I promise, as much as it is in my power, I will get through tomorrows race unharmed."
"Promise?"
"Yeah Mattie, I promise.