Disclaimer: This story is a work of fiction. It depicts a romance between two consenting adult males and may contain some descriptions of sexual act between two consenting adult males. If you are not of legal age to read this kind of story, please leave now. If you reside in area where reading stories that include sexual situations between two consenting adult males are illegal, please leave now. This story is for entertainment purposes only. Any similarity to any person(s) living or dead is simply a coincidence. The author retains all rights to this story. It cannot be reproduced in any form without expressed written permission from the author (me). Please contact the author for any requests aspucin70@yahoo.com. Copyright 2006
RIP TIDE Chapter Three and Four: Meet Matt (From Matt's point of view)
"Matty, hurry up " I heard my mom calling me. I shuffled my feet trying my best to deliberately annoy her. My dad was already standing outside on the cabin porch, making final adjustments on the camera and stand. I must admit I kind of liked the idea of this photograph. It is going to probably be the one that all of us will remember for a long time. I felt a sting of sadness, and I knew why; tomorrow I will be on my way to college, 300 miles away from here and 1000 miles away from home. My parents wanted to follow me all the way to the school but I objected. How embarrassing would it be to have your parents escort you to your dorm? Yeah, I know that a lot of kids do that but to me it's not cool. After weeks of arguing, they finally got this idea to follow me to Tennessee, where they had a time-share cabin. That was ok with me; I was not sure that my car would make it all right for the whole trip. I had our family mechanic go over it and change the oil, but it was still an old car and I felt much more secure having dad's truck as a back-up vehicle.
Mom grabbed me by the shoulder and pulled me on the porch. I faked a bored-out of my mind face into the camera, which prompted my dad to give me a phony stern look. "Young man, you better shape up or I will send you to military school instead. Look happy, damn-it " He was bad at faking harsh demands, which made me giggle. He set the camera, hurried around to take his place next to mom and me, and than he placed his hand on my shoulder hugging me along with my mom. Several seconds later, the camera buzzed and took the shot.
I was glad that we did this. My parents never go out on vacations, let alone all of us together. This was a good chance for them to incorporate a mini-vacation with my road trip across the four states. They didn't agree at all with my school choice, being across the world from home and all. Ok, it was NOT across the world, but this was further than I have ever been away from the place where I had grown up. You are not in Kansas anymore, Toto, I thought to myself.
The next morning, after tearful good-byes all around, I started descending on the curvy mountain road towards town, where I jumped on the highway that would lead me through Savannah toward my college town. It started to rain, but I didn't care. I was looking forward to this trip. I had my maps; some food and coffee; I was listening to some good tunes on my stereo; and I was on my way to college! How great life can be!
Droning on the highway my mind started to wander off. I have been away from home before but not like this. Of course I was nervous, I knew THAT. It doesn't take a degree in psychology to figure that one out. But it was more than that; a new school is one thing, but this is a whole new life, a life alone, that is. Suddenly it hit me. Alone. I felt a wave of anxiety surge through my body. All of the sudden, I was feeling totally lost, scared, uneasy, and worst of all, lonely.
Can I do this? Can I really do this?
I had to laugh at myself. Is little Matthew scared to leave his mommy's side all of the sudden? The same Matthew who DEMANDED to drive alone to the college that HE picked out himself? While at the time it seemed like good idea, I now thought to myself, this IS a big deal for me. There is a reason, probably a million of them, to be worried. But I also know I would be fine, after all, I am not the only one doing this. It is not like I am some lonesome pioneer braving through uncharted territories. Stop being silly, Matthew. You'll do fine. I kept saying to myself.
I arrived to my college town later that day. It took me a while to orient myself and find the campus. Then I had to go through the usual procedures to get all the paperwork done, find my dorm room and finally get settled in. I shared my room with Steven, a skinny guy from Iowa. Steven was a computer nerd and his half of the room was crowded with a desktop AND a laptop, a printer and various pieces of computer equipment. We talked a bit, but obviously we did not have too much in common. After I was done unpacking, I headed outside to see the campus.
It was a very nice afternoon. It still hadn't got too cold, but fall was definitively here. I enjoyed my little walk, soaking up the evening sun and crisp air, settling in this quiet town's atmosphere. I began to feel hunger; no wander, last time I had a decent meal was breakfast this morning with my parents. During the trip I snacked, but that is hardly a meal, let alone healthy.
I stopped at some Cuban restaurant to grab a sandwich and coffee. I decided to take them outside and sit on the bench in front of the restaurant. I enjoyed the moment for a bit looking at the slow traffic, and then I dug into my sandwich. I barely made it through my first bite when I saw a guy walking on the other side of the street. I cannot place what exactly brought my attention to him. He was simply walking down the street with his headphones on and backpack over the shoulder, nothing special about it. Ok, I admit, he was a piece of eye candy, tall and very well built. You could see that he had wide shoulders and all the right muscles in all the right places without being bulky. His pecs were filling his shirt very nicely with rounded shoulders and nice biceps. He had short dark hair and a dark tan giving him that Italian look. His high cheekbones rounded out his facial features in a very manly way. But it was more than just his build and looks. It was the way he walked and it was familiar to me for some reason. It was like watching a well muscled animal, confident in itself, going on a hunt. "He looks like a panther would look," I thought to myself, "Beautiful and dangerous at the same time."
I realized that I was actually starring at this guy, while I sat there with my sandwich half way to my mouth. I took another bite not even noticing the taste. I continued to watch him as he passed my view and I could only see him from behind until he turned the corner. I took a sip of the coffee, still holding his image in my head.
This guy was hot. That was the only way I could describe him, plain and simple. He was in his twenties, maybe even went to my college. That was a good possibility. That means I will most probably see him again. My college wasn't very large, I am sure that if he goes there, I will bump into him eventually. I tried to get back to my sandwich, but I just couldn't get this guy out of my head and the way he was moving down the sidewalk. Then it dawned on me; once I meet one of my dad's friends who is into martial arts of some kind, he was a black belt or something similar. This guy was moving in exactly the same way my dad's friend moved. Same fluidity, same gracious motion. The only thing different was that my dad's friend did not ooze sexuality like this guy. He did not have that Italian look to him. Sexy? No, not just sexy. More like smoldering hot.
If you haven't figured out by now, I am gay. Twenty years old and totally uninterested in the opposite sex. I knew I was gay for a long time. I discovered it when I was in Junior High. My counselor tried to convince me that "exploring" (what a euphemism) is normal, and that by the time I finished puberty I should be "normal" (his words); that did not happened. The only thing that did happened was that by then I was sure that I was gay.
The biggest stress I had was coming out to my parents. Being an only child, I guess it was especially hard on them to accept my sexuality. My dad was shocked. His son, his pride and joy, someone to teach how to throw a football and talk about girls took a different path. I knew that was a huge disappointment to him. I know that more than everything he wanted a "normal" life for me and he knew that by accepting to be what I truly am I would never be as accepted as somebody who is straight. It did not affect our relationship other than that - I know that he still loves me unconditionally, no matter what. I am totally disconnected from all typical guy stuff, football, beer in a pub, ogling over girls - my dad was left alone on that. And don't even give me any tools - the garage is a foreign planet to me. On the other hand, I was quite good at track and field but I never got interested to be competitive. I am good at drawing - charcoal is my favorite medium. So I do have SOME positives traits. In addition to that, I love to do stuff outside, like biking and hiking. Dad and I found our connection there. I was fortunate that he was willing to explore other things like camping and hiking so we still had father-son time together. The only thing is I could never bring myself to talk to him about my love life (or the absence of it). Something like that was always mom's department. Luckily, she was even more supportive than my dad so I guess I lucked out in parent department.
The only thing that I never had any luck with was to actually find someone to call my own. Growing up in small town in Kansas, you can only imagine what kind of prospective was there for a young kid like me to find a soul mate. There was no gay "community" there. I am sure there were other people like me, but I just never had the luck to find one. Truth be told, I was scared to look. That was the main reason why I am still a virgin. I was very frustrated over that fact, but after one all night talk with my mother and a lot of shed tears, she gave me a very good piece of advice, "Do not hurry with sex. It can do more damage than good. Besides, I am sure that beautiful boy like you won't have any problem finding love in this world."
I was very grateful for that advice. It stopped me from making mistakes and despite the frustration that I never had actually slept with anybody yet, I was not unhappy with that choice.
Besides, I was painfully shy. Crowded places with lots of people were filling me with anxiety. I would rather go to the movies alone or with Mary. Mary was my neighbor, just couple years older than me, and she was working in a local bookstore so we hang out sometimes. Yes, she knows about me.
As for her comment about my personal appearance...I don't know. She IS my mom, after all. At 6ft and with a decent build I guess I was average; I did lot of outdoorsy stuff, so I was in pretty good shape: six-pack and nice toned pecs, but nothing on the side of actual muscle-bound jock. I do have deep-blue eyes, which I guess you could find attractive. Black hair is my father's trait and I keep it neatly trimmed. I don't know, somehow I do not categorize myself as "beautiful" or "hot".
Morning of the second day came and I had a class at 9 am. First class of my college career and a mandatory attendance I could not be late. But as fate would have it, everything was going wrong that morning. I set my alarm clock for 7:30 but I did not realize that it was actually set for 7:30 pm. Of course, when I woke up, it was almost nine. I beat the world record in showering and yet I was still late when I ran into the Science building clutching in my hand a note where I had written the lecture room number.
112, where is 112? I followed the numbers from 101 to 110 and that was where the hall ended. Did I write wrong room number? Is this the right building? Oh damn it, damn it, damn it. I started to run back towards the exit when I passed something that looked like a sign. I looked up, turning to run backwards at the same time. It was a big banner informing all newbies that 112 lecture hall is actually an adjacent building, with a separate entrance. At least someone had mercy on our poor souls. As I turned around, my vision was blocked with something all of the sudden. I tried to stop but it was too late. I slammed full force into a guy who looked like he appeared out of nowhere. In a split second both of us were on the floor.
I tried to get up but the impact knocked the wind out of me. It felt like I hit a cement wall. Finally, after what felt like minutes, I managed to get on my feet and look around.
Oh shit. It was that guy from across the street.
With the light coming from behind me every detail on his face was clearly visible. Dark hair, high cheekbones, tanned cheeks. A strong jaw line with beautiful firm lips and the most beautiful dark eyes that I have ever seen on a person. So dark that I could swear that they were black.
And they were spitting fire directly at me.
This guy was not moving at all and yet there was so much hostility avalanching from him that I could almost feel it hitting me in the chest. All of the sudden I felt weak, like someone had drained all the energy out of me. I felt dizzy and I almost had to close my eyes to regain my composure. My eyes focused on a portion of the floor that had all of my notes, papers and books lying in a pile. Then I saw that this guy had his fist tightly clenched.
Oh shit, I am gonna get it. There was no doubt in my mind that this guy was perfectly capable of annihilating me completely with just one slam-dunk. I managed to look back up to him, to say something, anything, just to try to get some kind of explanation for all this out of me...but my lungs were still fighting for air.
Then something happened. There was no visible change, it was more like a force field being lifted. I cannot describe it. One second ago you could cut the tension with knife and now it was simply gone. But the most fascinated transformation happened in this guy's eyes. They were not hostile anymore. They were still dark, but not black. Suddenly, they become warm. Like "I-am-all-open-to-you" warm. It was amazing. Without a single motion or word from him, he completely changed.
Finally, I managed to stutter some lame, half-ass, apology as to why I ran into him. He was looking at me for one long second more and than he stopped me by lifting his hand, like he was trying to stop this flood of incoherent words that were coming out my mouth.
"No, it's ok, really. You just caught me off balance, that's all."
His words shook me even more. His voice was deep, husky and definitively masculine. The kind of voice that smokers have. His voice made my chest vibrate even though he was talking very quietly. My legs quivered I almost had to sit down.
WHAT A HELL IS GOING ON WITH ME ?
I concealed my shakiness by picking up my papers from the floor. He was still next to me while I just could not, for the love of God, get grip on my life. He was trying to talk to me, asking me something about my being freshman. I was one short step away from turning into a blathering idiot. I had to get out of here. I HAD TO!
I shuffled all my papers into one big pile and stumbled down the hall. In my head stuff was getting more clear, but I just couldn't deal with all this right now. My brain was trying to process too much information at the same time, while I only had one picture in my head.
His eyes. His black, deep, fire-inside eyes.
I managed to run into room 112 just in time to get in line with other students who were picking up some handouts. Luckily roll has not being called yet, so I collapsed in a seat and managed to regain a semi-civilized appearance.
Jesus, what a mess. Just one hour ago, my life was so perfect and look at it now. I propped myself to sit more straight up in my chair. The professor would soon start to take the attendance and I figured that I better pay attention. "Better than I was doing that this morning, when I ran into Mr. Dangerous," I said to myself. Shivers ran up my spine when I remembered his clenched fists. I honestly believed that he was half of a second from beating my scrawny ass to a pulp. He definitively looked like someone who you should not mess with.
But his eyes...how captivating they were. Now that I am recalling his image the more enchanting they seem to me. And that voice...I absentmindedly placed my hand on my chest, almost hoping to feel those humming vibrations that I had when he was speaking to me. I could only feel my heart beating against my hand. Holy cow, I think I am falling in love with this guy who almost hit me. Something is wrong there. Matthew, what is going on with you?
"Matthew?"
" Matthew? Mathew Hartwell? Is he here?"
I realized that that was the professor calling my name for the third time. "Here " I lifted my hand. What an idiot I am. Stop with this daydreaming, damn-it.
The lecture was short, mainly a review of the syllabus and the usual mandatory information. In less than half an hour, we were free to go. I did not have another class until noon, so I decided to call my parents.
"Um, where is my cell phone?" I searched my clothes, my backpack, all my pockets - no luck. I hurried back to the lecture hall, look around my seat and in between the seat rows with the same result. Hesitantly, I returned to the same place where I bumped into that guy. Nothing. The hall was clean as a whistle.
Shit.
I returned to my room and after almost an hour of tearing my side up looking, I concluded that I lost my cell phone. Somehow, somewhere, it's a goner. I tried to find it by calling myself from the room but I only got my own voice mail.
Well this is just lovely. What a day. Worse of all, I do not have a phone book. All the numbers that are important to me are in my phone. I called my dad's cell, but couldn't get through. Up in the Tennessee mountains there is little to no reception. I didn't know the hotel phone number either. Shit.
I sighed and sat on my bed with my head buried in my hands. My mind was racing and I couldn't get a hold of myself. I felt like I was on a roller coaster, tumbling me left and right. This is really shaping up to be a really crappy day. And it's not even 11 am yet. I felt desperation and weakness again so I flipped myself on my back in the bed. I need a minute to regain my senses. Maybe an hour. Or a week. I sighed again. Ok, this is not the start that I imagined but it is not the end of the world.. I lost my cell phone, so what? I managed to get to my class on time, barely, but I was still ok. Nothing wrong had happened, right?
Wrong.
Yeah, that's right - Mr. Dangerous, he happened. Or I happened to him, which is more like it. Again, the image of his fiery eyes came to my mind. I was not quite sure was I still terrified or attracted to those eyes. Both perhaps? Like moth attracted to a flame.
I was lost in my thoughts when Steven walked in. I almost jumped out of bed- why am I feeling like he caught me doing something wrong? Not like I was jerking off or anything. Well, mentally maybe. Shit, I HAVE to get this guy out of my head. This is going to mess me up completely if I continue like this. Luckily I had Sociology class to go to at noon, so that gave me the motivation to get going.
The rest of the day went uneventfully. After classes were done, I went back to my room, had my dinner, and I spend the better part of the evening writing emails. Unfortunately my parents did not have access to the internet, so I was wondering how I was going to get in touch with them. I couldn't remember the name of the hotel either. I thought that I would try to get in touch with my uncle tomorrow regarding that. I shut off computer and went to bed.
The next morning, after my morning class, I decided to grab something to eat at the campus cafeteria. I did not like the idea of a crowded space, but I did not have much money, so I had to be careful with it.
The cafeteria was a mad house; there were too many people and too little space. Everybody was talking, laughing, moving around. I got a sandwich and small bottle of orange juice and realized that I couldn't possibly eat here. I started to move towards the exit. Finally outside, I took a deep breath and looked for nice quiet spot. Across the cafeteria was a park with large trees that was looking just right for my stressed-out mind. I scooted over there and sat underneath the tree with my back against it. Yeah, this is much better. I unwrapped my sandwich and started to eat.
"Umm, Matt?" I heard someone call my name.
I absently nodded my head, trying to swallow my food. All of the sudden, as I craned my head towards person who called me, I realized that there is something sketchy here. Unfortunately, by the time my brain caught up with those vague feelings, I already looked up. My poor brain got overloaded again in that split second. Question, who here knew my name and why does that voice sound familiar, and I recognized the face. It all collided together in my brain. I choked on my food.
There was Mr. Dangerous, standing with his hands in his jeans pocket, with an expression on his face that it was hard to read. It was a strange mixture of curiosity, anxiety and perhaps nervousness.
I jumped on my feet, which prompted him to actually back off half a step. But this time it was not a defensive reaction. It looked like I startled him. We were standing about three feet apart looking again at each other. Just when the situation started to be awkward he repeated my name but in not same fashion as the first time. This time it sounded more like he was looking for conformation.
"Matt?"
He sounded like he was settling down. Like he found what he was looking for or who he was looking for. I was still in mild shock over his appearance. If he told me that a space ship landed and dropped him there, I would have no trouble believing it.
"Um,...yeah...I'm Matt." I realized that I did not know what else to say. My mind was washed from any capability to say anything meaningful. Thankfully, before I turned into a blathering idiot, he stuck his hand out and introduced himself to me.
"I'm Hayden"
"Hi, Hay...den."
Why I'm I stuttering? I accepted his hand. He had a pleasant, firm handshake. He actually had to come one step closer to me, so now we were standing at a normal civilized distance for two adults to have conversation.
" How are you doing? I hope that you settled ok?"
Ok, what is going on? He is pleasant, even more, friendly. Is this some senior prank? I decided to be cautious.
"Thank you for asking, yes. I have to apologize for running into you yesterday. I do not have a habit of running into people."
"Aw, no problem. Actually, now that I think of it, I found it funny that you knocked me over," he said as he flashed me a smile.
Oh my God. He had a toothy grin, which exposed almost all of his white teeth. I do not know why I found that so hot, but it made him scorching hot for that fraction of the second. Almost wolf-like. I had to look away, somewhere else, anywhere but at him. "Yeah...sorry."
For a moment there was an uncomfortable silence again. I wanted to say something, something interesting, something funny, witty, anything to keep this stud in my presence.
"Umm...so.. are you freshmen too?" I managed to say a complete sentence.
This may work as long as I don't have to look at him directly. So much for my social skills. This guy is going to find out what an idiot he has standing in front of him and run away to his friends to collect his bet or to his girlfriend who made him do this as part of some weird project.
"Nah, I am sophomore. Been here for a while. Where are you staying?"
Now that was an odd question. Even I knew that. People do not usually ask you something personal like that thirty seconds after they introduced themselves. I doubled my defenses.
"On campus."
I figured that was safe enough, not telling him a room number or anything really important. Besides, I couldn't grasp the concept why he was asking me that. But I underestimated him. He caught on my distrustful feeling immediately.
"Oh, I am sorry man, I did not mean to prowl. It's just that your mom said that you didn't have place to stay and..."
I looked at him in total disbelief. How on Earth...?
He instantly caught my expression and immediately stopped to reached into his pocket, giving me my cell phone.
"...um, I found it in front of the Chem lab...it looks just like mine, so I picked it up. Didn't even realized that it was not mine until today and then your mom called all worried about you."
I was so relieved. Hey, if you are like me, half of your life is in your laptop and the other half is in your cell phone. My first impulse was to hug him. No, I cannot do that. Be cool, Matt. You know what is going to happen next, do you. He is going to be pleasant for another two minutes and leave. Forever. You will see him on campus, maybe he will nod his head and that would be it. I managed to put on a happy face.
"Thank you sooo much, Hayden! You do not know how important my cell is to me. I wish that there is something I can do to repay this..."
Ha, nice played, Matt Good way to ask him for...anything. Quickly, think of something. Wash his car. Clean his house. Be his slave for a day. Anything.
"No need, man. I'm all set, thank you. I wanted to be sure that it was yours. I'm glad that we got that sorted out. Now can you do me a favor?"
"Sure...anything" And I meant ANYTHING
"Can you please call your mom and tell her that you are ok? She sounded really concerned this morning. Ok?"
"Oh, that. Sure. Yes. Yes, I will call my parents." Oh well, I tried, didn't I? I still managed to keep my happy face. "Definitively, man. Thanks again. "
"Cool...well, I guess I'll be off now. See you later, Matt," he said, looking me straight into the eyes, tilting his head just a little bit, with a trace of smile.
"Umm...a...ok" I stammered, realizing that this was it. Even though I tried to play my game well, he was still leaving. He is clearly not interested in me and what the hell I was expecting. Get a grip, Matt, and try to act civilized. I managed to put a faded smile on my face, looking at him, trying to memorize every detail on him. He nodded his head and walked away. I lustfully gazed after him realizing that this was probably the only time I had a chance to speak to him. In my hand, still warm from his body, was my cell phone. I thumbed against its silky surface almost being jealous of my cell phone for being so close to his body. I sighed from the depth of my being and leaned against the tree. I needed something to lean on.
No. I needed SOMEONE to lean on.
Hayden. I needed to lean on Hayden.
End of chapters 3 and 4
Finally, a decent end to a chapter. I decided to combine 3 and 4 so it will come to meaningful finish. I do owe you guys an apology: I did not sort out necessary details the way I should. Hayden and Matt are in undergraduate school, not a grad school as I mentioned before. Also I made remark about how Matt's mom thinks that he doesn't have place to stay, while it is clear that he has dorm room on campus. I'll try to fix that in next chapter. Also, MANY thanx to a GM, who went to great deal of frustration to actually edit the whole thing, and point some of my mistakes. Take care, HF