Ring in Mine #3: Nephi and Jerome: Chapter 20
Chapter 20 ends this sequence of four tightly related chapters. There are some real crazies in these chapters. Though the names have been changed and the incidents seem impossible or at least improbable, they are based loosely on individuals and situations that really exist or happened.
Remember that Nifty Archives do not make money. The opposite is true. If you can please click on the link and donate. If you check the list you should find my name.
http://donate.nifty.org/donate.html
Note: Some really strange things happen at the St. Patrick's Day Parade in Utah.
--------- Nephi & Jerome Chapter 20
Life became more predictable. Jerome would go to school. Nephi would work on designs for landscapes. Only Paula knew when Jerome and Jerry left for school, Nephi was working shifts with the uncles to make extra money. It had been a drier than normal winter. Even though there was no snow to plow he still had a family to support.
In the afternoon he would make calls trying to find clients. He had a small portfolio that impressed potential clients but many weren't thinking that far down the road. Nephi needed to get the Peter and Sons brand out there.
Nephi and Jerome agreed they needed to shake things up. Salt Lake always had a big St. Patrick's Day parade. Luke was Irish so he and Benny had been marching in it for years. Jerry overhead Benny telling Jerome and Nephi how much fun they had in the parade each year.
Jerry appeared wearing a green t-shirt blowing on his kazoo. "Dad, I want to be in the parade. I know Donny wants to be in the parade too."
Jerome's mind pulled things from his marketing class, putting them next to the parade and came up with an idea.
"They don't let commercial floats in the parade, but we could sponsor Mary's preschool class. We decorate the trailer in green grass carpet, make a cheap black pot and use sprinkler pipe as the framework for a rainbow. The kids would wear green shirts and hats like leprechauns. They could play the kazoo and ring cowbells just like Kazoo Days. We will need to get new P&S logos for the truck and trailer. A big sign on the trailer could say `Our Youth are the Real Treasures.' What do you think?" Jerome felt like he had shared his idea all in one breath.
Nephi was thinking hard when Jerry decided for him. "Dad, I want to be a leprechaun and ride on the trailer."
Benny's addition solidified the plan. "It would be a business expense. The new logos would be Peter and Sons - Landscape and Design. We could have someone passing out green taffy and pamphlets wearing the new logo on green t-shirts."
Benny would take care of the paperwork and budget. Benny had a client that would design the new logo, for a long weekend at the cabin. They were discussing who would decorate the trailer when Jared, Drake, Hope and her new boyfriend walked in.
"What's so exciting that you are talking on top of each other?" Jared asked. Four voices talked at the same time. Jared held his hand up. "Jerry, you tell me."
Jerry looked at the others with a smug look. "My school is in the Green parade. We are playing kazoos and riding on the trailer."
Jerome filled in the details. "We are trying to decide how to decorate the trailer and who should do it."
Hope and her boyfriend were at the kitchen table bent over a notepad. Hope looked up for just a moment. "What is the budget?"
$100 seemed to be the consensus. Hope's head once again joined her friend's. She asked questions about the trailer.
Hope re-joined the group. "Here is the deal if you like our ideas, the Design Club at school will build your float but we get to show it at the school's St. Patrick's Day Parade on the 17th two days before the city parade. If we win the prize money, the club gets to keep it."
The Design Club was an eclectic mix of students, budding artists, kids that liked building things, and kids with aspirations of becoming engineers. The initial sketch was impressive. Nephi loaned Jared and Drake, members of the Design Club, keys to the storage garage to build the float out of the weather. They found an old 24 foot trailer with a wooden deck that Peter had purchased and planned on restoring, but no one had ever gotten around to it. Then Grace purchased the two new ones. Jerome thought it was junk; the Design Club thought it was perfect.
Jared had a debit card for materials. He forgot that he needed to turn his receipts into Benny. He borrowed a truck. Jared and Drake returned with lumber, chicken wire and lots of Styrofoam sheets and McDonald's combo meals for everyone. Holly was keeping the blueprints secret. At the end of the first night it looked pathetic, just a framework and of lumber.
The next morning Nephi and Jerome slipped into the storage garage for a peek. They were a little disappointed. After locking the doors, Jerome took it upon himself to console his partner. Nephi didn't need consoling, but he wasn't complaining either. When Nephi came he left evidence of their love making splattered across the project.
When they returned home Nephi had to remove a sliver from Jerome's bum. "I told you we should have done it doggy style." With the wood sliver removed Nephi had to kiss it better. They were just pulling on their clothes when Jerry returned from school with Donny.
"Donny's mom isn't home. Can we have peanut butter sandwiches?" Jerry asked. It took five sandwiches to feed all the little mouths, everyone from the Valentine's sleepover. They practiced marching around playing the Kazoo. It was with a sigh of relief when parents arrived to pick up their kids.
The pair of tired parents slipped into bed. Jared stuck his head in the bedroom catching them kissing.
"I can't believe you are still at it. From the look of the project you shouldn't be able to get it up. It was hard to explain all the crusty spots on the wood." Jared left laughing.
The float could have been a government project - riddled with budget overruns. The second time Jared and Drake asked for more money; Nephi was broke.
"If you want this done, we need more money." Drake pointed out.
"Give me a list of supplies you need. I'll see if I can get one of my clients to donate it." Nephi was going over the list they still needed. "Remember Benny needs the receipts for my taxes." Jared looked at Drake with a panicked look.
Nephi left Jerry with Paula. Paula was making meatloaf. Jerry was up to his elbows in raw hamburger when Nephi left.
Jerome hadn't even taken his coat off when Jared complained. "Your husband can be a cheap bastard. We needed more money and Nephi went to get someone to donate the stuff Holly needs. Then he wants us to turn our receipts into Benny. We didn't save the receipts. Doesn't he trust us?" Jared complained.
"Holly was sure she could do it for one hundred dollars. What sent it over budget?" Jerome asked. Nephi and he discussed it the first time they asked for more money.
"There was other stuff." Drake answered.
"Where do you think the money is coming from?" Jerome asked.
"The business is putting up the money!" Jared insisted.
"Nephi is the business. How many big snowstorms have we had this year?" Jerome paused. "Instead of a dozen we've had three. The last was Christmas. We only have a hundred dollars left in the bank and we still have to pay taxes. Nephi has tried to keep it a secret but has been working morning shifts at Marco's and Bertram's just to pay bills. If it doesn't snow, the budget will be tight."
"I didn't know." Jared wouldn't look his brother in the eye.
"You could have just told us you've been feeding your crew. We could have arranged for meals for less than you've been paying." Jerome announced.
"Nephi has been checking up on us?" Anger colored Drake's response.
"No he hasn't. Hand me the card." Jared handed the card to his brother. "Whose name is on the card?" Jerome pointed to the front. "You ran out of money the first time at Chang's Chinese. The card company called Nephi to make sure the card hadn't been lost. Nephi never overdrafts his card."
Nephi pulled up to the storage garage just as Holly arrived. He carried the materials into the garage. The float had come a long way. Stone flower boxes lined the sides of the float. A chicken wire and papier mâché kettle was at the back. A six-foot tall working stone waterfall hid the trailer from the truck. The last of the materials were to build a stone bench down the middle of the trailer.
"My client runs the Home and Garden shop that gave us the last of the materials. He has offered to loan us some of his plants. They would look good in the boxes along the edge." Nephi offered. Holly was excited. As soon as her group arrived to build the bench down the center, Nephi drove Holly to the Home and Garden shop. The owner agreed to loan two dozen box hedge plants. Holly also wanted to borrow grassy type plants to complement the waterfall.
Nephi also had ideas. Together they worked out their plans. They could pick up the plants the night before. They brought back two plants to see how well they would work in the design. The plants would provide that finished look. How they used Styrofoam shapes to simulate the stone work fascinated Nephi.
Jared avoided contact with Nephi for the next few days. Wednesday after school Holly met Nephi at the greenhouse. The loaded the plants for the float. There was an additional sign thanking Nephi's client for the living plants.
On Saint Patrick's Day Nephi had the white pickup washed. The new magnetic logos on the side of the truck looked sharp. The new logo emphasized the new design possibilities with Peter and Sons Landscaping and Design. Holly had explained much of the cost overrun and Nephi was all right with it. The trailer had required repairs. The boys had purchased a pair of horn type speakers and a 12V amplifier to drive them. One of the Audio Visual geeks had taped the Club playing traditional Irish songs on the kazoo. Nephi promised to act surprised.
Nephi delivered the float to the High School. The back of the pickup contained two five gallon buckets of green salt water taffy and two lawn chairs. With the help of parents with station wagons, Mary and her students arrived right on time. Jerome had cut his last class at college. Proud parents sat next to each other in the football stadium bleachers.
The marching band led the parade around the track. The first float was the cheerleaders. It was a simple trailer decorated with crepe paper. The senior cheerleaders were on the trailer. The junior and sophomore cheer squad walked alongside. Each float stopped in front of the bleachers for performance and judging. The driver stopped. The cheerleaders on the trailer lost their footing; some falling to their knees. The laughter showed the student body's opinion of the cheer squad.
As each float made its way around the track, the Design Club's float's construction and design was superior to the others. Members of the club were throwing candy to the students seated in the bleachers.
Nephi leaned into Jerome. "What would you say we enter the float into the parade circuit this summer?" Every little town along the Wasatch Front held a celebration and a parade. You could attend a parade just about every weekend of the summer.
When it came time to announce the winners, the stadium became silent. There were three trophies up for grabs, Students' Choice, Teacher's Choice, and Community Choice. Each trophy had a one hundred dollar bill inside.
Students voted by the volume of their response. The Basketball Team had a portable basketball standard pulled behind a car. The basketball players were trying to make trick shots. The team should have practiced more with a moving standard. They won the Student's Choice award.
A teacher committee selected the Teacher's Choice Award on school spirit. It went to the Student's Council's Papier mâché mascot.
A panel of community leaders chose the last award. They chose the Design Club's creation. Sister Johnson was on the committee. It was obvious even from a distance that the rest of the committee didn't like her. She insisted the Peter and Sons float not be the winner. She stomped out of the stadium.
The local newspaper took photos of the winning floats and the clubs that created them. Design club members stood behind the preschool students in their felt green bowler hats.
Marco hosted a pizza party for the Design Club that evening in celebration. It took a lot of convincing to get Jerry not to sleep in his hat.
Friday night it took extra time to get Jerry asleep. He had been in the high school parade, but Saturday would be the real thing. Benny had stopped by and had Jerry extra excited about the parade. Jerry was bouncing off the wall like he had consumed a full cup of coffee.
Jerry fell asleep. Jerome wasn't far behind him. Nephi was locking up when he heard the crash of glass. He ran upstairs fearing the worst. Paula was fine. A brick with a note attached lay in the living room. Paula called the police while Nephi searched up and down the block.
Nephi was returning to the house when a police car pulled up next to him. He was relieved until the officer climbed out of the car with his gun drawn. Nephi sighed. Why did it have to be this officer, again? In resignation Nephi put his hands behind his head and tried to explain about the brick.
Paula was being interviewed by another officer. He put on gloves and unwrapped the message.
You have been warned. Stay away from the parade or you will pay.
"I'm worried. My son is out looking for the person that threw the brick; he hasn't come back." Paula looked to the officer for reassurance.
The officer stepped outside for a moment and returned with good news and bad news. "Yours wasn't the only broken window tonight. They have the culprit in custody. I'll drive around the block and see if I can find him.
It was early the next morning before Jerome and Nephi walked through the front door accompanied by Chief Thompson. They had picked up Jerome three blocks from home. He had been knocking on doors looking for Nephi.
"Daddy Nephi, did you sleep in a police car? Daddy worried all night. I had to sleep with him." Jerry had dressed himself in his green shirt ready for the parade.
"My apologies Paula, I didn't realize that they had arrested Nephi until I arrived for work this morning. I spent last night with Mom. She also received a brick through her window."
"Stay out of this if you know what's good for you, bitch!" made little sense until he heard about Paula's brick. The arresting officer had dropped Nephi in a holding cell and had never completed the paperwork. If the chief hadn't walked through the cell block Nephi would still be there.
"The responsible officer left his resignation on my desk. He has taken a position in Cache County. They have a large right wing group in Logan." Chief Thompson turned as his mother and Jerry walked out of the back bedroom dressed in Peter and Sons t-shirts. "Mom what are you doing dressed like that."
"This lady is getting involved. My young friend and I are playing the kazoo in the parade today."
"Mom I'm not sure it will be safe." The younger Thompson announced.
"You're the Chief of Police; make it safe." Mrs. Thompson shut down any further conversation about not being in the parade.
Chief Thompson backed down to no one with a single exception. He thought hard and had a brief conversation with Nephi. The chief left with two extra-large t-shirts, company jackets and a plan.
Jared came in with two packages and an apology. "Thinking back there were a few purchases I should have talked to you about. This won't make things 100% better but it is a start. I got a member of the Design Club to paint these for you. You will need to open them in your room.
Nephi and Jerome returned from their apartment with smiles. Nephi hugged his brother-in-law. "Each is certainly one-of-a-kind."
It was a warm morning. Two men wearing company shirts joined the preschool group at the parade staging area. They took their place on the parade route, two John Deere lawn-tractors, each pulled a yard trailer filled with wrapped pieces of salt-water taffy followed the float. Jerome drove one and Nephi the other. The two off-duty policemen were tossing candy into the crowd, each watching a side of the parade route.
About two blocks into the parade, while the officer turned for only a moment to fill his candy bucket, three tomatoes flew towards Nephi. Every shot missed. The plan had worked. Nephi and Jerome were the targets keeping the kids safe.
The officer scanned the spectators. The crowd at the front turned also trying to find the culprits; three tomatoes meant multiple attackers. Both officers concentrated on the side of the first attack. A block farther the next vegetable barrage came from the other side.
Jerome wasn't as lucky as Nephi. He stopped for a moment and pulled clean clothes from the yard trailer he was pulling. He pulled off the tomato soiled shirt. Benny had painted green shamrocks on Jerome's nipples.
He began pulling a clean shirt over his head, someone from the audience shouted, "Leave it off!!"
The crowd picked up the shout. Jerome threw the shirt back into the trailer. The crowd cheered. Jerome unbuckled his belt. The spectators cheered louder when Jerome revealed a bright pair of green boxer briefs. They featured a shamrock where the fly should be. There was a leprechaun peeking behind the shamrock. "This guy is lucky!!" Jerome turned to see Nephi's reaction only to find him dressed in similar boxers; instead of a shamrock there was a golden coin. The leprechaun's speech bubble said something about hidden treasures.
Jared and Drake, now dressed like the older pair, took over driving the tractors. The four weren't the only scantily clad people in the parade. Nephi and Jerome tossed candy into the crowd freeing the officers to scan for the next attack.
When the next organic missiles, horse droppings, flew toward their target Nephi jumped out of the way. The officer motioned toward three boys in the crowd. Nephi watched dread wash across their faces when they realized they had been identified. The press of the crowd kept the officers from reaching the culprits, but the boys couldn't go anywhere either. They turned trying to get the latex gloves off and found a uniformed policeman blocking their path.
The undercover cop with Nephi announced that group they had arrested was quick to spill the beans. There were only two groups; one on each side of the parade route. Now they had to wait for the next attack. The last barrage had a little something extra. They followed the horse droppings with rocks. The officer stepped in front of Jerome. All three would have taken out Jerome. The officer fell to the ground. The four boys in the crowd didn't have a chance. There were two officers that had followed them along the parade route. One boy carried a movie camera. He had told the officers his little brother was on the float and they were making a movie for their sick grandmother. The developed film showed only the attacks and Jerome's strip tease.
The downed officer was getting up. He lifted the shirt revealing the Kevlar vest underneath. "I will be black and blue tomorrow but I should be all right." The officer didn't complain much as Nephi and Jerome insisted he ride the rest of the parade route on the trailer. The kids found him a Kazoo.
With three more blocks to go Jared noticed familiar faces in the crowd. He called everyone together. The still mobile officer took over the tractor on Nephi's side of the float. The four men in similar briefs moved up by the float. Each took possession of a cheap green bowler hat. The music went silent. Jared hoped everything went as planned they only had time for one practice. Jared had asked the club for a special recording as a surprise for Drake.
A slow Irish bump and grind based on Danny Boy played on the kazoo and drum filled the air. The four men turned toward the audience, huge construction paper shamrocks were strategically placed. The dance wasn't obscene; suggestive would have been the best description. They followed Jared's lead. Drake remembered Jared's performance the night before. The shamrock hid his embarrassment. Nephi loved the shocked look of Brother and Sister Johnson and their group of Forum friends.
The hats played an important role in their dance. They were held in strategic locations and passed from dancer to dancer as they bumped and ground to the music. It ended with the hats in front of the shamrocks as the dancers faced the trailer. Four paper shamrocks flew overhead. The men turned to their audience with hats covering their flies and tossed the hats into the air.
The performance lasted all of two minutes. One of the parade officials had stepped toward the float to tell them to keep moving. Instead he hooted and hollered with most of the crowd.
It wasn't until they threw candy into the crowd Jerome noticed Sister Johnson talking to a news reporter. She loved spouting her hate on television.
Two paramedics waited at the next intersection. They helped the injured officer onto the gurney. Luke left Benny driving the truck. After a quick conversation Paula and Marie took over driving the tractors. The crowd parted to let the paramedics through. A siren announced the departure of the ambulance.
With the crowd focused on the paramedics the four men grabbed their clean clothes, dressed and faded into the crowd. Luke and the remaining officer finished throwing the candy.
At the end of the parade route a reporter was interviewing Chief Thompson. Benny spoke for the company. The women allowed the reporter to ask one question of the group of children. "Did you have fun in the parade today?" The children cheered.
That night the extended family sat down to watch the early news. Jerome had foresight enough to pop a blank VHS tape into the video recorder. The parade was the top story. There was no mention of the excitement around the Peter and Sons.
As the anchor cut away to the commercial before the weather forecast four familiar men holding hats over themselves filled the screen. "After the weather the story behind one entry in this year's parade."
The news reporter had researched Peter and Sons. They aired an interview with Mrs. Thompson. "Nephi and Jerome have proven their dedication to our youth repeatedly. They sponsor the Kazoo Day celebration. It is a chance to memorialize youth that have taken their own lives and increase suicide awareness. They sponsor the preschool whose students appeared on the float."
There was a short scene showing Jared covered in tomato and the crowd cheering `leave it off!' In the background Nephi was stripping off his clean clothes to support Jerome.
Chief Thompson explained the death threats after the Kazoo Day and warnings delivered by brick. "The alleged culprits for the assaults at the parade are all minors. The last attack involved rocks. Officer McCoy stepped in front of the young man protecting the intended victim. The hospital released him in fair condition. He will be sore for a week but is otherwise all right."
They ended with the full two minutes of the "dance." The performers were not available for comment.
In the weeks following Uncle Leonard kept the family informed. The boys all attended the local high school and belonged to a young conservatives group. Rupert Johnson found an envelope containing a fifty dollar bill and a letter explaining there would be an additional $500 if he could get a group of God fearing young men to throw tomatoes at the damned homosexuals in the parade. If they threw feces, the payment would be $600 or $700 if they used rocks somewhere during the parade. The note warned them not to involve God's innocent children on the float.
It was being handled by the Juvenile Justice System. Drake was surprised that the media had not made the connection between the outspoken woman at the parade and her nephew Rupert. Jared noticed they were back in school two weeks later.
The float found a home in the storage garage until the parade season began. Easter was a month away. Nephi was grateful there wasn't an Easter Parade. What he needed was snow and peace.