Returning to Tate

Well here is the second chapter of Returning to Tate. I appreciate those that have e-mailed and I hope that the wait was worth it. The next update should not take as long. This chapter is a little more slower but I had to introduce several more characters. Hopefully you all will enjoy. -John

Returning to Tate

Chapter 2:

Out of an argument and back again

It was approaching seven o'clock when I pulled out of the hospital parking lot. The roads were still not too busy thanks to it being early. That was probably a good thing since my eyes were still watering up. I was not sure if Ricks parents would be up at this hour. That though would not be a problem. They made me keep a spare key from when I lived there. Mrs. Cross had made me keep it and told me that this would always be a home for me. The ride was fine through town. Tate was not a huge city. Generally as long as the traffic lights cooperate then you could get from any one part of town to any other in fifteen minutes. There definitely was something nice about a city like that. The drawback to a city that was around forty thousand people was that you never felt like you could get lost in it and more then once in the last two years I had lived here, I had felt like I wanted to be lost. The Cross house was on the corner of Dunhurst and Redbud Streets. My old house was just seven houses down Dunhurst from here, but I avoided looking towards it. The house was a nice two story red brick house. The neighborhood had been built in the sixties, which was nice because unlike housing developments of today they were all built in different styles. You did not feel like you could forget which house you are from. In the front yard were two twenty foot tall evergreens the Mr. Cross would decorate every year for Christmas. Along the walkway Mrs. Cross had planted some yellow plants that I did not know the name. Flowers were never my thing, but they were always pretty enough. Mrs. Cross always said that yellow was her color. As I walked up towards the door I was reminded of the first day I had ever met Rick and came to his house. It had been a week before both of us had been about to enter kindergarten. Up until that point I never had a friend. My parents, especially my Mother had always been a little skittish of having my brother and I out of the house and out of her sight. My parents were very inexperienced with the ideas of parenting when I was born and still pretty much inexperienced when my brother was born too. They were just the normal first time parents that did not want anything bad to happen to their children. So my Mother was especially protective and pretty much always kept us at the house under her safe watchfulness. If it had not been for my brother, I probably would never have met a friend until kindergarten. The day was a Tuesday and while my memory is not the best of that day being so young, for the most part I remember it well enough. Patrick was just three then and having a five and a three year old at once always kept my Mother running. We both were hard to keep up with. According to my mother once either of us started walking, we started getting into everything. On that day my brother was being particularly troublesome for her to keep up with. It was just after lunch and I remember I was really bored. I had a big wheel that I would ride around on, but my parents would never let me drive it away from the driveway if they were not around. On that day I became daring and starting riding down the street. It was a sort of an exhilarating experience riding to the corner by myself and that was when I saw Rick. He was playing in the front yard with some tonka trucks. I remember that he got excited to meet another kid in the neighborhood. Rick had been going to preschool at that point for a year so he was pretty comfortable walking up to someone else, but I was shy. Quickly though we both were sitting there playing with his trucks. I can't remember how long we sat there playing but eventually Ricks Mom noticed he was playing with another boy. I remember she came out and was the nicest lady. She just questioned me and asked me my name. She then brought us into their house and gave us oreos and milk. That in itself was an experience because I never had eaten oreos before. Even to this day I still love'em. Mrs. Cross got the phone book and called my Mom. I guess she was really relieved because she had just noticed I was missing. Mom rushed over to Ricks to get me. In a way it was the best thing to happen in my life. My Mom and Mrs Cross both got along pretty well. Seeing Rick and I play together, Mrs. Cross said that we looked like best friends from the very beginning. From that point all the way to graduation we had been pretty much the best of friends. That was the reason I had come here when my Father kicked me out. It was my second home and I guess my last home in Tate. Now as I stood before the door I felt a mixture of excitement, depression, and guilt about being here. Clearly I was excited that I was going to see the Cross's again. I had missed them even if I had not realized about how much. I felt depressed and guilty because I had not been here in so long. They deserved better then I. Always they had been there for me, especially my last two years in Tate, and once I got to Burke I sort of just forgot them. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my keys to unlock the door. As I swung the door open I could smell eggs and bacon cooking. I had to smile at that. Breakfast was one meal that I forgot even existed. Here in Tate though I always had breakfast, both my Mom and Mrs. Cross believed in starting the day with a good meal. I have to admit I did sort of miss that. At least it meant that Mrs. Cross was up and moving for the day. There was a part of me that hated the thought of just coming into the house and just crashing. I went through the door and walked to the kitchen. Apparently Mrs Cross had not noticed me entering the house because she had her back toward me while she was tending to breakfast. It was hard not smiling when I saw her. She was a woman that you would not think was approaching fifty years old. She was never shy on her age, but she always tried to keep herself in shape. Her hair was a dark black that she normally kept tightly up, but in the morning she always kept it down. It always amazed me how long it really was. It was only in the morning and the night before bed would anyone see it down. She was wearing an old ragged red oriental looking robe that she had owned forever. It had been given to her by Mr. Cross on their first anniversary twenty-two years ago. Even though she had been given others, she refused to ever wear another one. She loved it so much that she joked that she wanted to be buried in it. "Uh, hey Mrs. Cross," I spoke up after watching her for a minute. My voice was a little bit sheepish. I saw every muscle in her body tense up. "Justin is that you," she turned around and moved quickly over to hug me. "Is something wrong? You look like you have been crying!" He voice was filled with motherly concern. It felt good to be hugged right now. Why could my Mother not be like Mrs. Cross. She was a totally awesome woman and mother. "It is my Father, I guess he has had, well he has had a pretty bad stroke last night." "Oh dear, is he ok?" She held me tight. "Are you ok?" She pulled me a little away to look at me. "Yeah I am fine. I am just numb about it all." "You look like you have not slept at all tonight too. Sit down and let me get you some breakfast." She pushed me into a chair at the table and started to put more eggs and beacon on the stove. "Well, I do not think I slept more then an hour last night if that much before I was on the road. My Mom called me at like three am and as per usual I was up pretty late working on a paper." "Uh huh, you always were a late night person," She gave me that motherly look of I know better. Of course she was right, I had been up watching television. I was never one to go to bed early. "Yeah, well I did work on a paper earlier in the night, but no I guess that was not all last night. Although I am sure I look worse then I feel right now. You know I feel guilty right now because I am not sure how I am supposed to feel about all of this. There is a part of me that feels pretty damn sad at my father's stroke, but there is a bigger part that really feels numb and that makes me feel guilty." "Honey, you have nothing to feel guilty about. It is only natural that you would feel that way. He ceased being your father four years ago. You deserved better then that," she said sympathetically. "I know, I know, but dammit he still is my father and if I had not been gay he would be proud of..." "Now do not even think of going there Justin," Mrs. Cross said sternly. "Listen to me, a Father should be proud of you if you are straight, gay, or whatever. Parents cannot choose who their children are or even what their futures hold. What they can do is be supportive, help them along, and hope they become good people. You have succeeded despite your Father." God I missed Mrs. Cross. Sometimes I wonder why my Mom could not be like her, ok not sometimes, all the time. She is the most wonderful Mom, hell most wonderful woman that I knew, she even beat out my Grandmother, but not by much. Rick never appreciated her as much as he should. I guess though that is a matter of perception. Everyone always thinks the grass is greener on the other side. At least Rick would agree his Mom was way better then mine ever was. "Yeah I know you are right, but it is hard to feel like it is. I don't know... it is hard to describe. I feel more like shit on how my Mother reacted to me." It felt good to be able to get it all off my chest. Over the next couple of minutes I went through the whole ordeal of my family at the hospital. Mrs. Cross listened to me patiently and I could see the motherly support in her eyes to my plight. "Listen dear," she reached over and hugged me again. "I wish you had a better family. Lord knows that you deserve it. Unfortunately we all do not get what we deserve. You look tired and I have to get to work. I wish I could take the day off but the Henry Case goes before the court today and I am lead counsel. Tonight though we all will go out and talk, well all but Richard he is in Atlanta for a meeting this week." "Yeah I definitely need to sleep, but I am not sure if I will stick around until then. I was thinking about going back to Burke." I felt a little ashamed of saying that. Even in the safety of the Cross house I felt so damn nervous about being in Tate. "I've got classes and well you know..." Mrs. Cross smiled and in a way that I could not say no she replied, "Nope, sorry to say that you are at least going to stay until after dinner. For one you need to sleep and two you will need a good meal before you go back and three I know that you still need to talk and get things off your chest. You always have been bad about doing that, but no son of mine is going to keep things in. You may not have been born a Cross, but like it or not you are one now. Besides even if you went back before your classes today, you would just sleep though them. Your Professors will understand." I know that I blushed and did some sort of stupid grin because I could hear Mrs. Cross chuckle. It really did feel good to feel like I was someplace I belonged and that I was wanted there. There was no way I could now just duck out and deep down I didn't want to either. "Yeah, I guess I could stay for dinner at least. Thanks Mrs. Cross." "No problem dear. Your room is still the same upstairs and Rick won't be up until probably noon. His first class is at one. Just like you I never could get him up early," she chuckled. "If you need anything you know my cell number." She stood up and leaned over to kiss my forehead. "Now eat some breakfast and get some sleep." After eating breakfast I began to move upstairs to my room. The Cross house was a two story house with four good size bedrooms upstairs. As I reached the top of the stairs I could see that they had once again replaced the carpet on the second floor. It was a really thick carpet that made you think that you were walking on air. Mr. Cross never was cheap on decorating the house. His thoughts were that if you are going to do it, you might as well do it right even if it cost more. The fact that both the Cross parents were lawyers meant that they could afford to live by that creed. Once I got to the top of the stairs I moved to the door of my room. I had forgotten how much this house did seem like home until I started thinking of my room. Opening the door, the room was pretty much how I left it, except Mrs. Cross had spent some time keeping the room well dusted and vacuumed. The room was a good sized one that was about twelve by twelve feet. On the walls were the pictures and the trophies that I had left here. Over the years before my sophomore year I had become quite a good baseball player and wrestler. During those years I had won many awards and trophies. In fact in my freshman yeah I had been on the varsity baseball team and we had went to the state finals. After talk of me being gay started to spread around, I chose not to be on the teams anymore. A few of the other players had made it clear to me that I was not wanted and to be honest I just ran and hid from the world. When I went to college, in my plan to leave everything that reminded me of Tate out of my mind, I had thrown them away. Apparently Mrs Cross had salvaged them from the trash and placed them up here. She was always proud of me, even when I wasn't. I had to smile at seeing them, because I guess the truth be told I was glad they did not go to the dump. The pictures were that of my family and of my high school days. There was a really good one of Rick and I dressed in our graduation gowns with Patrick grinning proudly beside me. It was a day that should have been a special one, but one that my parents did not attend. Even though I was surroundwed by my Brother and best friend, I remember the feeling of being lonely. It was a feeling that I had tried hard to forget while I was at Burke, but it was always there below the surface. I shifted my eyes away from these things in an effort to try to push those emotions back down. I turned and looked at the door that went to the bathroom that Ricks and I's bedroom shared. For a moment I thought about going through and waking Rick up. Besides the fact that I did not want to wake him up this early, I didn't know what to say. I had not been a model friend the last two years. Ok I really was a pretty shitty friend. I just spent so much time hiding a Burke that I let myself forget about everything. I finally laid down on the bed and resolved to deal with all of this when I got up. Sleep would be the best medicine for me. Once I was a little rested I could at least thinks something through. Thankfully I pretty much fell asleep once my head hit the pillow.

I awoke with a startle as someone crashed on top of me. "So it is good to finally see my long lost friend!" My blurry vision focused on Rick. Rick had not changed much from the last time I had seen him. He had medium straight brown hair that obviously was in a state that only seems to happen while you sleep. He had very bright blue eyes that could make any girl just adore him. He had a medium build of someone that kept in shape but not overdoing it. It was obvious with the tan he had that a great deal of time had been in the sun. He was only wearing a pair of blue boxers that did not cover up much. If Rick was not like a brother I know that I would have been hot for him like all the girls were. "Hey how are you doing," I smiled and gave him a hug. "I have to say that is the best way to wake up. I wish my alarm clock at school was an almost naked guy leaping on me. I never would be late to class." "Or never get to class," Rick playfully pushed me back. Rick and Patrick were the only two people I ever felt comfortable joking about me being gay with. "Hey I have missed you. Mom left a message on my cell. She said you were here and about your father. She also said to let you sleep, so I hope I didn't wake you." I laughed, oh how I missed Rick. "No, I was already awake, but if I acted awake you would not have leapt on me. I could not miss that. How are you doing?" "Fine," Ricks face shifted more serious. "More importantly how are you doing? Are you ok." He pulled me over to him and placed his arms around me. My initial reaction was to say it was all ok, but if there was one thing I knew, it was I could not lie to Rick. Hell I had trouble lying to anyone, but Rick and Patrick could always read me. I even gave up in high school trying to bluff Rick in poker because he always knew. So with Rick I just let it all out. I told him all that had went on last night and this morning. I left out nothing except for Eric. I know I cried a little through the telling. Rick though sat there and just listened and held me. It was what I needed. "Well, I wish I had something profound to say, but you know I am here for you," Rick replied when I was done. "Try not to let all of it get to you. Your Father was a complete dick. I know it probably hurts but fuck him. After what he did, I don't think if I was in your shoes I would have came. You have always been a better person then that man." "Yeah I know but it is just hard," I had to admit that while I had so much mixed emotions it did make me feel better for Rick to say that. "What time is it?" I sat myself off. "Oh it is a little after twelve. I should be getting ready for class but I guess since you are here I can duck out of classes today. It is not like there is that many of them and one day will not kill me." "I can't ask you to do that. Your Mom would kill you if you missed a class." "Nah it is only four classes today, besides I think I am going to change majors again, so most of these classes don't matter," I had to laugh at that, I knew that this was not the first time he had changed majors. Rick was just as bad as I was in changing majors, but at least I tried to put thought in my major changes. "Besides she would never know and I know that you would never mention it to her. I still never had told her about the time you stumbled in drunk on graduation night." Ok, he had me there. The night after we had graduated I had wondered out of the party we were at and went down the block to another party by myself. I was so depressed that I had let myself drink more then I normally would had. I was not just drunk, but really I was wasted. I never knew how I got home, but I have the vaguest blurry memory of Rick getting me in the house and then spending the night up with me pouring all the water he could down my throat. He told me it was ok, but I always felt guilty about being in such a depressive state on a day that was suppose to be a happy one. Mr. And Mrs. Cross never knew about it. "Ok...ok, it will be fun to be around you today, besides I guess I cannot say much since I am not in my classes either today. How many major changes will that make it, three, like me?" Rick laughed. "Well I guess you are missing two others, because this will make number five. It does not surprise me. You only missed out on astronomy and computer science. I guess that makes me in the lead for major changes" "Wait you suck at math and you tried those two majors?" "Yeah well I momentarily forgot, you know how things go." "But don't both majors require calculus?" "Well, where the hell were you to tell me these things. I liked playing video games, who thought there would be math involved!" We both laughed pretty hard at that. I can see Rick making a rational like that. He always was quick to jump in anything. "And who thought you would need math to look through a telescope." Rick hopped up off my bed. "Okay I am going to take a shower and then when I get out I will find you some clothes and give you a chance to shower. Then we will figure out the plan today. That work for you?" "Yeah that is cool." I looked down at my wrinkled clothes. "Yeah I guess I am a bit unkempt. I should have brought some extra clothes down with me too." "Well think of it as a blessing. God knows what kind of crappy clothes you would have brought. You will get to wear some quality clothes." Rick was one that always had to have designer labels on his clothes. He never would be caught dead in a shirt that was not at least recently trendy. As Rick moved into the bathroom and began his shower, I got up. I was still tired but the few hours of sleep had helped a lot. Besides, my adrenaline of being around Rick was getting me going. He had said something about a plan for the day and to be honest I really had not thought about it. There was no denying I had to see Patrick today. It would be probably best to meet him at school as that came to a close today. I knew that my mother would not have him miss school and I did not think it was the best idea to go to the house to see him. Also I should make another trip to the hospital, but to be honest I did not know when the best time to do that would be. Probably this evening when my sister and Mom would not be there otherwise I will just be in another argument, but Patrick probably would want to go to the hospital and from what I got at the hospital I didn't think my mother would be having him go anytime soon. She was getting in protective mode. It was after one o'clock when we finally got out of the house. I felt really refreshed and awake now that I was in new clothes and showered. We had decided to go have lunch at the Preston Cafe. That was sort of an icon restaurant in Tate. It had been family owned for two generations now of the Preston family and nothing that moves into Tate tends to affect their business. It was the sort of comfortable cafe that really had home style cooking, except it was better food then my Mom could cook. Mrs. Cross's cooking on the other hand was better. The other plus side of it was that it was not expensive. We pretty much sat around and cracked jokes and talked about school. It felt good to just hang around with Rick and joke around, but I had to admit that it was also weird. To be honest it felt like that not everything was right between us, at least that was what it felt to me. We pretty much stuck to the topics of school and classes and the "old" days of high school. It used to be that we would talk about the girls that Rick was dating and problems we were having, but I think we both avoided those subjects. On the surface we seemed like everything was just like normal, but I think both of us felt a little like strangers deep down. It made me feel more and more guilty for not doing a better job in keeping in contact. A couple of times I almost breached the subject of what we were both feeling, but in the public area of a restaurant, it just did not seem right or comfortable. I guess in the end I just decided that I would put on my list having a conversation with Rick tonight. I could not go back to Burke with things like this. Rick was my best friend, and even more then that he was like, no he was, my second brother. I also made myself a promise that from here on out, I would not let things get to this point. It was two thirty when we got out of the restaurant. From the restaurant Rick and I drove to good old Tate High. Ok, I did not have great memories of the last two years there, but there was a certain quality about the building you had to like. It was one of those old stone school buildings that were built in like the early part of the century. In winter it was either hotter then hell in a room or colder then the outside. If the summer was hot, well, lets just say it always felt ten degrees hotter in the building. I admit that it would have been nice to have air conditioning and a good constant heat in the winter, but there was something to be said about going to a building that had that historical charm and a look of tradition. Most buildings built today seemed so cold and impersonal, where as Tate High had all sorts of it old charms. I think if you went to it, no matter what memories you have of high school, there would be a certain pride in having gone there. The other thing nice about Tate High was it was not like the huge big city schools where there was an atmosphere of paranoia and fear. Students did not have to walk through metal detectors, nor was there a legion of security guards. Students still could carry backpacks too there classes and teachers did not fear their students. I am not trying to say it was a small school. There were about fourteen hundred students in the four grade levels at the school, but it seemed to have avoided a lot of the problems other schools had gotten. While other schools bolstered their security in the wake of Columbine, the school board and principal of Tate High realized that it had been just a well publicized abnormality in the schools. They knew that while it was important to keep students safe, that the best course of action was to run a good school system and not one that was more like a prison system. I knew that Patrick had Mrs. Danley's Government class as his last one of the day, so I figured the best place to wait for him was outside the class. Another advantage of Tate High was there was no real problem with visiting the school. As we walked down the halls I have to say a lot of memories came back to me. Rick would crack a couple of jokes here and there, but I managed not to laugh too hard and shush him. I didn't want to disturb the classes. It would have been fine with me if only Patrick noticed me in the school, but that was not to be. As we got to the hallway with Mrs. Danley's class we passed the head of the Department classroom, Mr. Culpepper. He happened to be stepping out of the room when we turned the corner. There was no way to get past him as he called me over to him. He had not forgotten me, hell though he was one of those teachers that I am sure that never forgets anything. Mr. Culpepper was a teacher that had been working at Tate High for thirty plus years. He was a bald man that had that air of being a Bond villain and in a lot of way he reminded me of Donald Pleasance who once actually played a bond villain. For a man in his middle age, he still looked like someone that you would not want to mess with. He was a hard teacher on his students and a stern one, but he was a great teacher. He was one of those teachers you loved and was inspired by, or hated and usually still did better then expected because he rode your ass. I have to say I always did like him. There were few teachers that took the time to push me and motivate me, but also was understanding. When everything was happening at my home and there were some rumors flying around, Mr. Culpepper took me aside and had a talk with me. I remember that day well because I was scared to death when he called me into his office after class. Being head of the department gave him the luxury of not only having a classroom but also an office. The meeting happened after another student in class. Max York called me a fag loud enough for the whole class to hear. While the class mostly laughed at it, Rick leapt up and started to grab Max. Mr. Culpepper broke up the fight before it could get started. He yelled at Rick to take his seat and I remember Max smirking at Rick like, take that. Then Mr. Culpepper turned to Max and gives him a look that made Max's smirk melt into fear. He yelled at Max for instigating the fight and sent him down to the principal's office. Then as the class came to a close, Mr. Culpepper asked me to come back into his office for a talk. Honestly, I did not know what to expect when he brought me back to his office. I was really scared. My father was treating me like a horrible person and I think I thought Mr. Culpepper was going to do the same thing even with what he said to Max. At that point it was only four weeks into the semester and I only had talked to him in class during the discussion times and even then I did not say a whole lot. I preferred to try to act invisible, an act I was working to perfect at home. Mr. Culpepper though did not berate me or even give me a stern look, instead when he closed the door his demeanor changed to a softer person then I had ever seen him or even believed he could be. He basically just sat me down and said that I had nothing to be ashamed of or worried about. I can remember the words like it was yesterday. "Son, I don't know if you are gay or not, but the truth be told I don't care. You are a good student and a person. No one should have to take abuse even if they are gay, straight, or whatever. I know this is not a subject that you will be comfortable talking about, so I will not force you to, but to say if you need anyone to talk to, I am here. I may be you teacher, but you see I understand more then you can imagine, because my son was gay and while I know you think things are bad now, it is easier now then when he came out twenty years ago. That much I know for sure." Then Mr. Culpepper put his hand on my shoulder and I knew I could feel comfortable with him. I did not really talk to him then, but later in the year I did many times. He was always patient and willing to lend and ear and some good advice. A couple of times he even calmed me down on the days when I almost had a break down at school. When it came to looking for schools he helped me and I know that he wrote a glowing recommendation. In a way he became a lot like a surrogate father, except he was a far better one then mine. When I got my diploma on graduation day, I could see him sitting on that stage with a look of pride for me. I have to admit seeing him again in the hallway with a smile that he did not show to just everyone made me feel good. "So the young prodigy has returned," he patted me on the back. Then noticing Rick, "And so has the young slacker. How are you doing Rick? Still avoiding work when you can?" Rick just laughed and replied, "You know it Mr. Culpepper." It was a well known fact in High School that while Rick was intelligent, he avoided as much work as possible. I remember Mrs. Jeffreys, our ninth grade English teacher once commented that if he just put his effort in his work, as much as avoiding it, then he would be the valedictorian of our class. Rick of course was proud of that. "The teachers at Tate College have already met their match with my avoidance skill." "How are you doing Mr. Culpepper," I replied with a smile. "It is good to see you again," Mr. Culpepper smiled back. "How are things at Burke College and what brings you back to Tate?" I paused for a moment. I didn't want to talk about what was going on but I have always been able to talk to him about anything without lying and I was not about to start today. "Last night my Father had a stroke and is in the hospital. Thus I am here." Mr. Culpepper's smile shifted to a soft look of compassion that few students ever saw. "I am sorry to hear that, I really am," he once again patted my back. "How bad is it? And do you need to talk about it?' It wanted to talk to him, but I knew that the time was not now. "It is pretty bad, but I cannot talk about it right now. I am here to check up on Patrick. I haven't had a chance to see him yet, but if you have some time tomorrow I would like to talk." "Well, if you want to come around two tomorrow that would be a good time. I have the last hour as an open one and too be honest I would like to talk to you about something too. I hope all comes out well with your Father." The school bell rang as Mr. Culpepper finished his statement marking the end of the day. Students started to move into the halls and I realized I had just committed myself to staying another day. There was a part of me that just wanted to be on the road to get back to school, but there was a growing part of me that said I needed to stay here at least for a little longer to get some things done. Besides I felt I owed some people to spend some time with them. I did not get much time to contemplate this though as I heard my brother from behind me. "Yo bro," Patrick yelled with excitement. "I wasn't sure you would come down." He gave me a big hug. Patrick was a couple of inches taller and broader then I. He had always worked out more then I did and was on the football and the baseball team. He had the same blond hair as I but his hair reached down to his shoulders. His eyes were blue like my father and he had a light tan from practicing outside all the time. In his excitement to see me, he had that cocky smile that he always had. Patrick was generally always a happy person if he could be. That was the refreshing thing about my brother. "Hey Patrick," I hugged him back. "How are you doing? You look good." "I don't know, still in shock. Have you seen Dad yet? Mom wouldn't let me come to the hospital. She was like, 'you have school and your father would not want you to miss it.'" That certainly was our Father, school and sports, the most important things in the world. "Is he even alive?" Patrick sounded scarred. "To be honest I don't for sure, but what I do know is it is not good. I was there this morning but let's talk about this in the car. Rick can drop us off at the hospital." We moved to the car and started to drive to the hospital. During the whole time I caught Patrick up on what had happened this morning and the condition that had been told to me this morning. Patrick did not seem to be taking it very well. I started to ask him about what happened, but I could tell he did not want to talk about it in front of Rick. Rick and Patrick were pretty good friends, but they were not that close to each other. We both also were raised by our father to suppress our emotions or I should say crying. Father would always say real men do not cry. Hopefully after the hospital visit we would get a chance to talk. I could tell from Patrick that he really did need too, even has he kept a light hearted demeanor up. As we pulled up to the hospital Rick offered to come back if I called, but I told him that I would see him tonight for the Cross family dinner. I just figured that walking back would give both Patrick and I a chance to talk. It was a long walk, but when we were younger we walked everywhere. We walked into the hospital. I told Patrick that I would meet him up in the waiting room in about thirty minutes. I was not ready to go back up there this early. Besides I was trying to avoid family. I figured I could just leap in and get Patrick. Hopefully there would not be a scene with him there. Patrick gave me a understanding smile and began the walk to the critical care part of the hospital. As I watched him go, I felt guilty for letting him go alone, but I knew my Mom was there and then Patrick would be drawn into our fight when he should be more worried about Father. I found myself wondering down the halls again. I don't know if it was a sub conscience move but once again I was outside Eric's room. I almost walked right into the room before I realized where I was going. Out of nowhere I felt really nervous. I was never the most outgoing person, but once I talked to someone there never was any nervousness usually. I wanted to see him again, but I didn't want to seem overzealous to see him. He seemed like a great person to be friends with and I didn't want to scare him off if he found out I was gay. Even scarier was the thought that maybe I liked him more then just as a friend. Finally I got my courage up and walked into his room. Eric still looked hotter then hell as he sat up in his bed reading a book. Somehow I did not see the bandages or the injuries but instead I felt like I was looking at the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. He did not notice me immediately at the doorway and I took the moment to look at him and admire him. There was something about him that made me just want to go over and grab him. Just looking at him I felt a connection like I never knew and just as I thought of that he looked up and gave me a smile that felt like the world was alive with joy. It was a feeling I cannot remember ever having before, except for maybe this morning. "Hey Justin, come in," Eric waved me in excitedly. "I wondered if I would see you again. I was afraid my horribly injuries and looks might have scared you away." He pointed at his eye and laughed. "As you can see unfortunately I am still here." "Hey don't say that, you look fine," I know I had a stupid grin on my face. "Besides in a place like this it is good to be able to hang out with someone that is at least cool. I hate hospitals. Why are you still here? I thought you had said they were going to release you today?" "Yeah, the doctor just wants me to stay in one more night and then tomorrow morning he is going to take off the bandage over my eye and let me go. He just wanted me to basically rest one more day and I don't think he trusted me to do resting at home," He gave the grin of someone that was mischievous. "I will be glad to get out of here though. If I see anymore jello after this I think I will go psycho. Bill Cosby was a fucking liar when he said there is always room for jello!" We both laughed at that. "Although I have to say it is worth it to stay one more night to get a chance to see you again." I blushed at his comment. I just hoped that he did not notice it. I just try to ignore it and keep on talking. "So how are you feeling today? You sound like you are in a good mood." "I'm fine. Like I said this morning, this looks a lot worse then it is and of course the pills they give make sure of that. How is your situation here in the hospital going?" I grimaced a little at that. "To be honest I don't know yet. I am not ready to go up there to find out right now. I figured I could hide out down here and just forget about it all for the moment." Eric gave me a supportive smile. "Hey that is cool. I have to say that I am glad you did. I am glad you can use me to hideout from your problems. Being in the hospital and having nurses and doctors always around make you feel pretty damn useless. You saying that make me not feel that way and besides you keep my spirits up." "Yeah I appreciate being able to hang out and talk this morning. I really did need it. It was one of those mornings that you think you are about to flip out. You really helped me not flip out." I felt embarrassed because I knew I blushed again. Eric though did not seem to notice. "Glad to be of assistance. I guess you helped me and I helped you. It must mean we were fated to be friends," Eric put his hand out to shake mine. "To me that makes this hospital trip worthwhile." "I like that thought and I think you are right," I nodded to Eric. "It is sort of like fate. I didn't plan on coming to this room, hell I did not plan on coming back to Tate anytime soon, and what are the odds of you being up that early in the morning and finally stopping in front of your door to clear my head." "Not much, I am normally a night owl. Mornings are not my thing. I am glad though that fate has intervened. I can't say that I have a ton of friends, so every time I meet one it is like finding a treasure. But instead of talking all about fate lets switch to something more important, what do you do at Burke for fun?" Eric inquired. >From there we started to talk about what our hobbies were and what movies we liked and both of our addiction to Family Guy. In the next forty minutes I learned that not only were we both night owls, but that we were a lot alike. We both liked to read Stephen King and Robert Jordan. Both of us had at one time been on the wrestling team and he had been also on the swim team. We learned that neither of us was involved in sports right now, although neither talked about why we were not anymore. I of course had an easy excuse since I was in college. We were pretty much completely lost in conversation that the only reason I knew we had passed the thirty minutes I promised to meet Patrick at was when a nurse came in to check on Eric. "Shit, hey I am sorry to have to jet, but I was supposed to meet my brother like ten minutes ago!" I stood up and once again looked embarrassed. Eric just laughed at me. "Hey don't worry about it, it is all cool. So you have a brother huh, that is cool. I wish I had a sibling. Anyway I hope I will cya soon." "Well I will be around at least until tomorrow, so yeah. Hell I might even be able to come around later tonight. I may need a friend to talk too then." "Sweet, that would be awesome," Eric sat up all excited. "Sorry for the excitement, but like I said I have been going nuts." "No problem, it makes me feel good that I am cheering someone else up. I will cya later tonight." I stood up and started to walk out. For a split second I almost thought that he was checking me out as I walked out, but I was sure that I was just wanting to see things in the littlest of things. As I walked down the hospital corridors there was a spring in my step that I had not had for a long time. There was just something about talking to Eric that made me feel good. At that moment even as I was walking to the waiting room, I had no worries or fears. It was a weird feeling, but a great one. For the first time since I my sixteenth birthday the world felt good. I felt invincible. All good moments though come to an end. "You brought your brother here without talking to me first!" My mother was standing in the corridor in front of the waiting room. "I'm his mother and I should decide when he comes to the hospital and I should bring him." "What???" I asked incredulously. "He has a right to be here. He was there last night and he is worried just like the rest of the family." "Really, are you really worried? I am not sure. Maybe you just like to show your father in such a state. It probably makes you feel good to see him on the brink of death. You always did cause him stress, even when you were not there." "What the hell!" My temper was really beginning to flair. I could see several nurses beginning to look nervious at my Mothers and I's exchange. "You called me and I came. No matter what you may think and no matter what that bastard may think but he is my father and I do love him. I am not sure how I still can, but I do." My Mother started to break down into tears. "Oh sure you do, that is why you ran away and that is why you did..." "Ran away?!?!? Fuck this, you know what I am not going to stand here and listen to this. Where is Patrick, I said I would get him home and..." "Your sister took him home, at least..." I just turned and walked away. For the second time in a day I had an argument with my mother and I was not about to keep this up. All I could do was storm out of the hospital and start walking back to Ricks. At that point I did sort of want to have a cellphone so that I could call Rick, but in retrospect I just needed some time to walk and get the anger out of my system.