Roman looked at his lover, worried. "You're not saying anything."
Mike looked back at Roman. "I honestly don't know what to say."
Earlier that day, two padded envelopes had been delivered in the mail, one addressed to each of them. Neither packet had a return address or any other way to tell who might have sent them. Inside each was a thumb drive. The one addressed to Roman contained a movie and a text file from someone obviously taking delight in the chaos whomever it was that sent them was trying to create. The thumb drives contained the same video.
"Gay Gangbang Cum Whores Part 17?" Mike asked softly. There was no emotion in his voice or on his face. He appeared stunned. His eyes stared forward blankly, unfocused.
Roman sighed. He had tried to move past that time of his life, but here it was again. "Yeah, but there's more to it --"
Mike raised a single finger to silence Roman. "Gay Gangbang Cum Whores Part 17?" Mike repeated.
"Yeah."
Mike blinked uncomprehendingly. "How long have we been together?"
Roman didn't like where this was going. He could see his current life and love slipping away from him before his eyes. "We got married in 2008, and we dated for about a year before that. So about 17 years, now."
"Gay Gangbang Cum Whores Part 17?"
"Yeah."
"Were you ever going to tell me?"
Roman knew there was no correct answer to that question. "Probably not."
Mike appeared to deflate and shrink inside himself. "I'm disappointed, Roman."
Anger stirred in Roman's breast. "What? Because I kept something like that from you? It was before we ever met. I'm not proud of it, but it's also not really any of your business, even if we're married now. I don't know everything about your past, either."
Mike stirred, his emotions starting to rise to meet Roman's. "Why weren't you going to tell me?"
"Fine. You want to know?" Roman turned away to face the wall. This will be easier if he's not looking at the man whose heart he was going to break. "I was hooked on meth."
"I know that." Mike sounded distant.
Roman felt his relationship slipping out of his hands. If Roman's marriage was going to end because of this, it was probably best to get it over with quickly.
"Here's the Reader's Digest Condensed Version. I was dancing and stripping to get cash to feed that habit. One night a guy slipped a tenner into my g-string with a note and a phone number written on it. The same thing happened for five nights in a row, so I called it. A week later I signed a contract to be in a porno. A couple of days after that, I showed up at the place and they gave me enough trash to get tweaked out of my mind. I don't even remember much about the filming. Six weeks later, I got an email with a link to the video where I could watch myself get loaded up by 8 guys."
Roman continued, still looking at the wall, his heart feeling like it would break if he allowed it. "Two days after that, I went to rehab. That's where I met you. I talked about this -- or what I can remember of it, anyway -- in group therapy sessions, but we were never in the same groups. For me, getting past all the things that contributed to my addiction meant getting past that whole thing, too. I've tried to put that entire part of life behind me."
"Roman," Mike said once Roman gave him a chance to get a word in, "Say it again. Where did we meet?"
"Drug rehab."
"And this happened right before rehab?"
"Yes."
"So this was you hitting your rock bottom?"
"Right."
Mike put his hands on Roman's shoulders and turned him around to look him in the eye. "Then why," he asked, "would you think this would make a difference to me?"
"Huh?"
"Roman," Mike began, "most people go to rehab is there because things have gotten so bad for them that they need help to get out of it."
"I know that."
"We both needed to get to that point in our lives before we got help. If that's how you got there, it's no worse than what others did. Me included."
"You didn't shoot up so much meth that you made a porno without remembering it." Roman felt he had a point.
An almost imperceptible trace of emotion flickered across Mike's face. "Roman, have you even ever watched that damned thing?"
"Abso-fucking-lutely not."
"Good Lord," Mike muttered to himself. "Wait here. Give me a minute."
Mike moved to his laptop and opened it. The offending thumb drive was still plugged into the side. Mike clicked the touchpad a few times and dragged his fingers across its surface. He stared at the screen, brow furrowing slightly until he found what he was looking for. "Come look at this."
Roman blanched. "I'd really rather not."
"Get your ass over here and look at what I'm telling you to look at."
Obediently, Roman moved to stand behind Mike. He was certain his marriage was over and that he deserved whatever humiliation was about to be heaped on top of him by the man with whom he had shared the last two decades of his life. There had been countless opportunities to tell his story -- or how much he remembered of it -- in that amount of time. It had been too big of a mistake not to say anything.
Mike pointed to the paused video on the screen. "Tell me what you see."
Roman looked up. "I'm naked and in a sling. There are two guys with their cocks on my face, and it looks like I'm trying to get one of them in my mouth. Another guy is bent over and kissing or biting my nipple. Someone else has got his dick half up my ass."
"Now watch."
Mike hit the spacebar on his laptop, and the move resumed. The cock that was half inside of Roman began thrusting deep, fast, and rhythmically. Roman's screams of pleasure were quickly muted as one of the cocks on his face found his wet mouth and filled it. The other dick slapped sharply at Roman's cheek, and the man on his nipple raised his head slightly, turned to the side, and slid down Roman's body heading to his profusely leaking cock.
The movie was paused again. "What do you see, Roman."
"Pretty close to the same thing I saw before, only a minute or so later."
"You're not looking, are you? Get your face down here and look closely."
Roman felt that this was essentially adding insult to injury, but he did what he was told. He put his face next to Mike's and looked at the screen. "I'm getting fucked by one guy, another one is starting to suck my cock, I'm sucking someone else's, and another guy is smacking my face with his dick. There's a few other guys in the background, but that's it."
"For Christ's sake," Mike muttered to himself, hitting the spacebar again to start the movie.
Roman stared at the screen as the action resumed. He had to admit that what he was watching was definitely arousing. His crotch was stirring in his pants and his hole was all but twitching as he watched himself being violated but all these men. One cock replaced another in one hole or another while the man on his dick regularly alternated between Roman's cock to his nipple.
"Holy SHIT!" Roman exclaimed.
"Finally," Mike commented frustratedly.
"Mike!"
Mike smirked to himself, waiting for Roman to articulate what he was trying to say. "Wait for it."
"Mike--"
"Almost there."
"Mike, that's fucking YOU!"
"Houston, we have comprehension."
"You're sucking me off!"
"Aaaaaaaannnnd, he gets it. We were both secretly porn stars before we met each other."
Roman stared at the screen uncomprehendingly as he watched the guy who was fucking him on the screen obviously and noisily begin to unload up his guts. The fucker pushed inside him as far as the sling would allow, his entire body spasming. On-screen Roman also screamed as much as he could around a mouth full of cock. Roman's cocksucker (how was that Mike???) released the dick with an audible sucking sound and disappeared from view.
The camera angle shifted to show a view from between the top's legs. He pulled his impressive dick out of Roman's ass, and a blob of cum slowly oozed from his slightly-gaped hole. Before it could fall, though, the cocksucker's (Mike's!!) face appeared and began to felch the load out of Roman's ass, lapping hungrily and moaning in satisfaction as he gulped down the load, nose buried in Roman's taint.
"That wasn't the only load I ate out of you," Mike said quietly. "You'll see that if you watch the entire vid. I was blitzed out of my mind like you were, and I only remembered a bit here and a bit there when I woke up the next morning. The fact that it was mostly blacked out is what made me decide it was time for rehab."
"But--"
"Roman, we've both made the same mistakes. Literally, in this case. We both kept the same secret from each other. When I said I was disappointed, I was more disappointed in myself than in you. I should have brought it up at some point. And you should have felt safe enough to share that with me."
"Wait," interjected Roman. "Wait, you're eating cum out of my ass and been sucking my cock and eating my nips. How did you not recognize me when we met at rehab?"
Mike looked at him sarcastically. "Roman, I was sucking your cock, biting your nipples, and felching loads out of you for hours. How did YOU not recognize ME?"
"I was so high that--"
"Exactly. Me, too."
The two men fell silent. The only sounds were coming from the video as on-screen Mike finished slurping at Roman's hole and moved his head out of the way for a massively-hung black cock to take his place. Uncomfortable yelps --muffled by the dick that was still in Roman's mouth -- came from the laptop's speakers as he was stretched by the ebony rod that was as big around as a man's wrist.
Roman blinked at the screen. "I don't remember taking this cock at all."
Mike paused a beat. "Do you still love me?" he asked.
Roman's eyes remained on the screen. "Of course I do. Do you still love me?"
"Absolutely." Mike continued watching the video as well, shifting his position slightly.
"So what now?"
The black man shot his load deep in on-screen Roman's ass. It was already beginning to soften as he pulled out. Mike's face was quickly re-buried in Roman's crevice, sucking and licking every bit of man-seed out that he could get.
"Do we know who sent us these thumb drives?" Mike asked.
"Not a clue."
"Do we care?"
Roman paused, watching the video of his husband's tongue savoring Roman's ass while yet another cock (and load) were waiting. "If we're still good, then I don't know that I do. I mean, I'd like to know, but I don't know if I'd make a big deal out of trying to find out just for this." A wet spot had formed just to the left of the zipper on Roman's blue jeans.
"Ditto," said Mike.
"So what do we do?"
Mike hit the spacebar on his laptop, freezing the screen. The scene showed Mike spitting cum into Roman's wide-open mouth.
"Let's get naked and start this movie over from the beginning," Mike said firmly. "We need to refresh our memories."