Quarterback Keeper

Quarterback Keeper: 15

The Rules

Michael was helping Ian unpack and set up his room when Charles and Mindy arrived. "Nice place you got here Joe," Charles said, "but I would have to have an elevator put in."

"No." said Mindy, "you would have to cut down on the pizza and beer."

"Speaking of beer, Cousin Joe," Charles said, "you wouldn't happen to have a cold one handy would you?"

Joe laughed, "Good or cheap?"

"Cheap, I doubt I'll even taste it going down, I'm so parched."

Joe went to the fridge and got Charles a Lone Star and Mindy a bottle of water.

Joe said, "Let's go out on the deck and have a discussion before we involve the boys." As they walked by Ian's room, Joe motioned to Tyler who was still moving his stuff in with Joe's to join them.

Mindy started, "Charles and I have had a discussion about rules and we think that the boys should be subject to house rules. They live by the rules of the house they are in for the weekend. Also, we are telling Michael that your apartment is off-limits when Ian is at our house and you are not there."

"That sounds good," Joe said, "What about sex?"

Charles put his fingers in his ears and started singing the OSU fight song. Joe and Tyler broke into laughter and Mindy punched him in the ribs and said, "Stop that! You know the boys are going to have sex," Charles started singing louder.

Finally Joe asked, "What are the rules at your house?"

"We decided that Ian will have a room across the hall from Michael's and he can leave clothes and other things in it, but it will be up to them as to where he sleeps. Also, I put some supplies in Michael's bathroom. I know he found them because for two days he couldn't look at me without blushing."

Joe said "It will be similar here. However, I only have two bedrooms, so if the two need some space, Michael will have to crash on the couch. I also bought some supplies and put them in the bed stand in Ian's room. I don't know if Ian or Michael have found them yet."

"Yeah," Tyler said, "they found them. I didn't think it was possible to giggle and turn beet red at the same time. By the way, nice touch including a Bible."

The boys walked out just as the adults broke into laughter. "See," said Michael, "I told you they were talking about us...Can we be a part of the conversation?"

"I don't know," Charles said with a smile. "Do you think you are mature enough to be a part of it?"

Michael looked at him and said, "This from the man who was just singing the OSU fight song at the top of his lungs." There was more laughter.

Mindy asked, "So what do you think should be the rules?"

Michael said, "Well based on what we just found in the nightstand and what I found in my medicine cabinet, the rule on sex....."

Charles started to put his fingers in his ears and Mindy gave him a hard elbow to the ribs and said, "One more time Charles and you will be a eunuch." Everyone on the deck but Mindy reflexively reached to protect their jewels.

"...the rule on sex," Michael continued, "is when we are ready, and be safe?"

"So, how about drugs and alcohol?" Tyler asked.

"No drugs period," Ian said, and Michael continued "house rules on alcohol, and no drinking and driving."

Joe said, "Let me make this clear; there will be NO drinking at all for underaged boys in Salt Fork. Tyler and I are teachers and coaches and Ian is a student at the high school. As for the apartment in Tulsa, what happens in Tulsa stays in Tulsa."

Charles said, "Ian, at our house, Michael is allowed to drink beer during family events and in moderation. Also, while we have asked him not to get drunk at his friends' houses and at parties, our rule is we expect him to call us to pick him up rather than driving home, and if he does that, he's not in trouble. We ask that you do the same when you are with us." Ian nodded his agreement.

"So now for the big question:" Mindy sighed, "how often do you get to see each other."

"Mom, Ian and I have been talking about that. We are thinking we should see each other every other weekend. So, we would spend like one weekend a month in Tulsa and one weekend a month here. Plus of course homecoming and proms...and when I win the State Tennis Championship," Michael added with a smile.

"I think you have made a very mature proposal, but can I ask why you decided on every other weekend?"

Ian spoke up, "I don't want Michael to miss out on his senior year with his friends, also I think I should make my own friends rather than just depending on Michael."

Michael added, "However, we don't know what to do about holidays."

Charles looked at Joe, "Hopefully, Joe and Tyler will be spending at least a part of the holidays in Tulsa and then that won't be a problem."

Joe looked back at Charles and replied, "I'm sure we can work it out."

The New Kid in School

School would be starting in a week and Ian had been tagging along with Tyler to football practice. While the team ran drills and plays, Ian ran the track. Tyler noticed that Ian had a tremendous amount of endurance, and Tyler wasn't the only one.

"Hey, Joe Dana Brock English teacher and girls basketball coach said. "Who is the new kid that Tyler is bringing to practice every day?"

"That's Ian Ramsay. He is a student from Scotland who will be attending Salt Fork this year. I am his guardian for the year."

"He sure likes to run."

"That's what Tyler tells me. I really haven't noticed." Joe said teasing.

"Come on William, you know I got stuck with X-country this year."

"Well it was your turn," Joe said as he continued to toy with Dana. Bill had a hard time filling coaching positions, so whichever coach didn't have a sport in the fall got stuck with X-county.

"So why have you never had to coach X-country?" Dana asked.

"Oh, I did in my first few years here. Then I became a union rep., lead Social Studies teacher, accreditation chair, A.P. Government teacher.... oh, I almost forgot, I won a couple of State Championships."

"Okay, I get it, you've paid your dues. But can you at least help me out?"

"What do you need?"

"First I need some help setting up a practice schedule, and maybe you could go to the first couple of meets to make sure I don't screw up the entries and stuff,...oh, I almost forgot, can you run our X-country meet?"

William laughed, "Is that all?"

"Well the team really sucks. Would you ask Ian if he would join the X-country team. Then we'd at least have one runner guaranteed to finish the race."

"Ask him yourself," Joe said and pointed to the door.

"Oh shit," Dana said and turned around.

Ian was smiling and except for the sweat soaked hair and running gear, you wouldn't know he'd just finished a run. Ian stuck out his hand and said, "Hello, I'm Ian Ramsay. How may I help you?"

"I am Coach Brock, and I was just asking Coach Bartlett if he thought you might be interested in joining the X-country team."

"Well" Ian said, "I am already taking band and choir. Also, I plan to be in Tulsa one weekend every month. So, I don't know if I will have time for such a thing."

Joe said, "Ian it's up to you, but let me give you some information to help you decide. First, band and choir are classes, so you will take them during the day. X-country is a sport, so its practice is after school. Football practice is much longer than X-country practice so we won't be eating until later anyway. Second, we can arrange the schedule so you won't miss out on your Tulsa time....Oh, I almost forgot, I will be helping Coach Brock with the X-country team."

Ian smiled, almost as big as Coach Brock, and said, "I think I would like to try going out for a sport. I hope I'm good enough to make the team."

"Well Ian, how far can you run?" Brock asked.

"I am still learning my American distances, but today I only ran three miles. I usually run four. In June I ran a 10 K; I think that is around six miles."

Dana Brock's smile would have gotten even bigger if it weren't already stretched to the max. "Oh, I am sure you will make the team." She couldn't believe her luck, an assistant coach and a ringer, and all before noon. This was going to be a good day.

Ian was a natural when it came to social situations. The poise and confidence that Joe saw in Scotland made him a hit in America. By the time school started, Ian had become friends with the X-country team and half the football team. Joe had to stifle a laugh when he heard on of the girls on the X-county team say, "Why are all the best guys at this school gay?"

Of course Joe knew that not everyone would welcome Ian. Salt Fork had its share of rednecks, homophobes, and bigots. He just hoped Ian could handle it when he ran into them. Little did Joe know that Ian's first test would come during third period on the first day of class. Thursday was just a half day for students to get their schedules, meet teachers, and for the freshmen to find their classes and lockers. So, no one was expecting any trouble, let alone a fight.

Dowl Hobbs and his family had moved to Salt Fork three years earlier, and were living in a trailer parked on his Great Aunt Claudia McNutt's property. Dowl was an outsider and hung out after school with a couple of high school dropouts. In school, he pretty much kept to himself. He did join the football team thinking his size would earn him a position, but he remained a chronic benchwarmer.

Mr. Stanbaugh had posted the seating chart and students were checking where to sit. Dowl said loud enough for the class including Ian to hear, "Fucking fairies. Bad enough this town is crawling with them, now we have to import them from Ireland." The room suddenly grew quiet and the attention shifted to Ian to see what he would do.

Ian didn't change his expression from the good natured smile he had before the comment and walked up to Dowl, extended his hand and said, "I am Ian Ramsay and I must correct your misinformation; I am a Scottish fairy."

"Fuck off, and you'd better not be checking me out in the shower, fag."

"Oh, you needn't worry about that."

The class laughed and Dowl got a confused look. "What did you mean by that?"

Someone from the back said, "It means you're too ugly to even think about fucking."

There was more laughter. Dowl turned red, balled up his fist, yelled "asshole," and took a swing. However, Ian saw it coming and easily dodged the blow. Dowl threw another punch with the same effect.

Ian said, "I've been brawling with my brothers since I was old enough to make a fist. You don't keep a pretty face like mine if you can't duck a sorry poke or two,"

Now Dowl was blind with rage and tried charging like a bull. Ian ably sidestepped the rush and Dowl ran face first into Mr. Stanbaugh's file cabinet and bloodied his nose. Stanbaugh, who had been helping freshmen in the hall, heard the commotion and ran into the room along with several other teachers. Not sure what had just happened, both Dowl and Ian were taken to Principal Mayfield's office to sort it out.

Mayfield wasn't exactly sure what to do with a fight in which no blows were landed and the only damage done was self-inflicted. In the end, He decided the best thing to do was call the adults and have a chat. So it was that Joe, Ian, Dowl, James Hobbs, and Claudia McNutt were seated in the conference room as Principal Mayfield explained that a non-fight had taken place during third period.

"What do you mean, a non-fight," Dowl's father James yelled. "Look at my son's face."

"Yes, your son is a bit bloody, but he did it to himself when he tried to tackle Mr. Stanbaugh's file cabinet. All of the students confirm that Ian never touched Dowl, nor did Dowl touch Ian. Since this is the first day, I suggest we just let it slide give the boys a long weekend to cool off and a warning."

"Bullshit, that faggot provoked my boy and I want him punished. It's time the perverts crawl back into the shadows so normal people don't have to....."

"James Dowl, that's it," Claudia McNutt yelled. I will no longer put up with your vile ideas and your useless lazy ass. You will be off of my property by sundown or I will have the sheriff arrest you for trespassing. I took you in because my only blood, my little Mary, was dying of cancer. But she is gone now, and I can no longer stand the sight of you."

"So you will throw Dowl to the street too, James Hobbs yelled. "He's your kin, your blood, your Mary's boy."

Claudia looked at Dowl and said, "Your father is no longer welcome; however, I will let you stay if that is what you want."

Dowl stood silent for what seemed forever then said, "I want to stay with Aunt Claudia."

"Too fucking bad you little piece of shit. If I can't stay, neither can you."

Claudia pulled out two envelopes and laid them on Mayfield's desk. Then she said, "James Hobbes, we are going to make a deal and Principal Mayfield and Mr. Bartlett are going to witness. In this envelope is a document surrendering all your parental rights to me. In this envelope is five thousand dollars and the title to that old truck of mine you've been driving. Sign over your parental rights and the second envelope is yours."

"And if I don't?"

"Then I will call Mr. Anders and he will call the sheriff. He has three checks totaling $2,500 that have had my name forged to them. I am certain that you are the person who forged them. So you see James either take the offer and never come back to Salt Fork, or you go to prison for the next seven years. Either way, I will have custody of Dowl before the end of the week."

"You old bitch," James yelled.

Claudia just looked at him with steely eyes and said, "Yes I am. Now sign."

James grabbed the custody papers and scribbled his name, then took the second package and left the office slamming doors all the way to the parking lot. Mayfield picked up his phone and said, "Mrs. Sherman, please come to my office and bring your notary stamp."

Claudia looked at Ian and said, "I am sorry that you saw all of that drama. You must think that we Americans are a savage and uncivilized bunch."

Ian smiled, "Not at all ma'am. We Scots are well known for our clan wars. Some would say a Scot is only at peace when he is too drunk to fight."

Claudia grabbed Ian by the shoulders and said, "I like this one. I insist that you, Mr. Bartlett, and Mr. Simmons come to dinner tomorrow. Now Dowl, say goodbye to young Ian. We are going home to clean your face and get an ice pack on you to stop the swelling."

"Goodbye Ian." Dowl said grudgingly.

"I'll see you tomorrow," replied Ian.

That night Ian lay on his bed wearing only a pair of pajama shorts; his snapchat partner was similarly dressed.

"So love," Michael said, "it sounds like you had an interesting first day of school."

"Yes," Ian replied, "I hope they are not all like that."

"Have I told you that I miss you?"

Ian chuckled, "At least five times, but I can stand to hear it at least one more time."

"I miss my little Scotsman."

"Hey, don't go calling this Scotsman little, or you will never get under his kilt again."

"Oh, please don't make sex jokes. My cock is hard again. If I have to wank off again, that will be my third today."

"So wank off again. It's not like you can wear it out. If you could, mine would be in the shop for service right now."

Michael laughed, "Okay buddy boy, what's the most times you've ever jacked off in a day?"

"Are we talking a calendar day or a 24-hour period?"

"24-hour period."

"Seven."

"Seven! What the hell?"

"It was a bet with my friend Tommy. We bet 50p on who could cum the most times."

"Who won?"

"He did, he got nine. But, I will never do that again. By the time I was done I was spitting out cum dust and my cock was raw for a week because I ran out of lotion and baby oil. The last two wanks were with bubble bath and that is not good. So what is the most you have cum in 24 hours?"

"Five," said Michael," and I thought I was never getting over the edge with the last one."

"Okay, how about we bet."

"What's the bet?" Michael asked.

"Who can go the longest without jacking off?"

"So what are the stakes?"

"Loser has to give the winner a blow job."

"Okay," Michael said, "that's a bet. Sorry sexy, but I have to get some sleep. Soccer has been kicking my butt. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Ian rolled over, turned out the light, and tried to get to sleep. He tried breathing exercises, counting sheep, reading; nothing was happening. After an hour Ian was just about asleep when his phone dinged an incoming text. He looked at it and smiled. It said, "I owe you a blow job."

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy

Claudia McNutt was a fine cook and a crafty hostess. She had shortened her dining room table from an oval to a circle and arranged the seating with Joe and Tyler on her right and left, which meant that Ian and Dowl were seated next to each other through the meal and where she could watch them easily.

Claudia was an interesting woman. Joe knew she had been an elementary school teacher in Salt Fork for thirty-four years. He also knew that she was responsible for the first negotiated teacher contract and for getting female teachers the same pay as male teachers. Finally, he knew that she was well loved by many of her former students who lived in Salt Fork. She was the teacher who alway looked out for the underdog and found some talent in a student that could be praised. Joe also knew that Claudia had never married and there were whispers that she might be a lesbian.

What he didn't know was that Claudia had been diagnosed in college with a condition that made having children a danger. So, being the practical woman, she found a surgeon who would insure she would never have to make a choice between her health and the children she so much wanted. Also, given that she would not have children, meant that she felt no need to marry. That is not to say she did not have a use for men. While in Salt Fork she was the old maid school marm, but her summer vacations, and holidays were spent in the company of several men who shared the same view of marriage and the same appetite for carnal fun. Also, Claudia was a wise investor. She has from the beginning of her career invested in stocks and bonds and amassed a considerable fortune. A fortune she had hoped to leave to her niece.

During supper, the conversation was about sports, Salt Fork sports. Claudia was a Rattlesnake through and through and a member of the snake pit. As she and the coaches talked about the team and the prospects, the boys simply sat quietly and only spoke when asked about football or X-country. After the main course was finished Claudia said, "I have planned to dessert later this evening on the front porch. It should be cool enough in about an hour. Dowl, why don't you show Ian the game room while I visit with Coach Bartlett and Coach Simmons."

Dowl led Ian to what was the back parlor of the old Victorian's double parlor. A ground floor maid's room had been added to the game room to make space for a pool table and two card tables. Claudia hosted a weekly bridge game with friends from the area. Dowl asked, "Do you play pool, or should I say billiards. That's what Aunt Claudia calls it."

Ian smiled and said, "That sounds like fun."

Ian broke and the boys played for a while in silence until Ian said. "Can I ask a question?"

"Okay."

"I have never known anyone named Dowl, does it have a meaning?"

"I looked it up once. It is Celtic and means dark stranger. It was my grandfather's on my fathers' side name. I really don't like it."

"What is your middle name?"

"Kevin, that was my mother's father. He was a fun guy. I loved going to my grandparent's house on my mom's side when I was younger. Unfortunately they died when I was ten."

"Oh....So, do you like Kevin as a name?"

"Yes."

"So, why don't you use it?"

"My dad insisted that I be called Dowl."

"Well, from what I heard yesterday, you can choose your own life now, including your name."

"Hey, I can. Thanks, call me Kevin."

"So Kevin, do you really hate me because I'm a Scottish Fairy?" Ian asked.

Kevin lowered his eyes and said, "Sorry, I don't hate you because you're gay?"

"So why do you hate me?"

"I don't hate you; I'm jealous of you."

"Why?"

"I've been in this town for three years and don't really have friends. The guys I hang out with are losers and I know it, but they are all I have. However, you show up with your good looks, big smile, and great personality, everyone just welcomes you into the group."

"I see."

"So when Terry said I was too ugly for a fag--I mean a gay guy--to fuck, it pissed me off that you had just been accepted without question. I know it's not your fault I am a frog and have no personality."

"Hey Kevin, you're not so bad, and, if you want, I can help you change your image."

"You called me Kevin. I like that!" Kevin said. "But, I don't think you can fix me."

"Don't underestimate me. We fairies specialize in turning frogs into handsome princes."

"That's not the right story."

"I know, I may be gay but I am not a princess, and I really don't think my boyfriend would want me to kiss you."

Kevin and Ian both laughed.

"Kevin and Ian," Claudia called, "please join us on the porch for dessert."

When the boys stepped onto the porch, Ian said, "I have an introduction to make. This is my friend Kevin Hobbs."

"Kevin?" Tyler asked.

"Yes, I prefer to be called by my middle name, Kevin."

Claudia got up and hugged Kevin as tears streamed down her face. She looked at Tyler and Joe and said, "Kevin was my brother and Kevin's grandfather. He loved this boy so much." Then she kissed Kevin on the forehead.

After Claudia regained her composure she said, "You must forgive my emotional display."

"No," Joe said, "we were intruding on a family moment, and should be the ones to apologize."

"I don't think that moment would have happened without the prompting of young Ian," Claudia said. "Thank you," and Kevin nodded in agreement.

As Claudia and Kevin were serving strawberry shortcake, coffee, and ice tea, Ian leaned over and whispered into Joe's ear.

Joe said, "Claudia, Tyler and I go every Saturday morning to visit Tyler's mother in Ames. We do chores and then we all go to the Ames Cafe for lunch. On the way back tomorrow, we plan to stop in Enid for some last minute school shopping. I was wondering whether Kevin needed anything. He would be welcome to join us."

"That would be wonderful. I have thought for some time that Kevin needs a new look, but I am not really the person to help him shop. Before you leave, I will give you money to buy him clothes and anything else he needs for school."

Tyler asked, "So what do you need?"

Before Kevin could respond, Claudia said, "He needs everything from underwear to shoes and a jacket. Tomorrow, while he is gone I will be cleaning out his drawers and closet. Also, please pick up some dress clothes, I think it is time the boy starts attending church."

Kevin looked at his aunt, "I didn't know you went to church."

"I don't, but I have my faith and it's good enough for me, but you need some instruction so you can decide what is good enough for you." She then looked at Joe and asked, "Do you go to church?"

"Yes ma'am, we go to the Episcopalian church."

"Oh yes, when I was still teaching, that's where I attended. I guess my membership is still good there," she said with a chuckle.

The next morning the guys picked up Kevin and headed for Ames. Mary Simmons doted on the boys and they competed with each other to see who could get the most work done. At noon, Joe announced it was time to get lunch and then head to Enid for some shopping.

When the boys came to the porch Tyler said, "Pew, you guys stink. We can't take them to the cafe, let alone clothes shopping."

"They can take a shower here," Mary said, "and I can wash their clothes."

"No Mary, we are not putting those two pigs in your clean shower," Joe said then he looked at Tyler, "Take them back behind the shed where no one can see them and hose them off. I'll go to the cafe and get some to go burgers."

"What are we going to wear?" Kevin asked.

Tyler said, "Don't worry, when I hit you with that cold well water, there won't be anything big enough for anybody to see." Kevin and Ian both blushed.

"Tyler, behave yourself. I'll go grab some shampoo, soap, and find some of stinkpot's old athletic shorts." Now it was time for Tyler to blush.

When Mary was gone, Joe said, "If I hear one stinkpot at school, I will know who said it and neither of you will laugh for a week. Am I clear?" Ian and Kevin both nodded. "Good," said Joe. "Now go strip off behind the shed so I can get your clothes in the washer before going for lunch."

The boys ran off to the shed, and Tyler said, "Thanks, I owe you."

"Yes, your ass does owe me."

"Ummm, I like your payment plan."

After lunch the boys got dressed and it was back to Enid for Ian's remake of Kevin.

Ian asked, "Where do you guys get your haircut?"

"My barber is in Tulsa," Joe said.

"I just go to Super Cuts." Tyler said.

"Ok, we need to stop at Super Cuts first." Ian said.

When Kevin got in the chair, Ian told the stylist to give Kevin a clipper cut. The stylist looked at Kevin, and Kevin said, "He's my image consultant, do whatever he says." Soon, Kevin's long stringy hair was replaced with a classic, easily managed cut. "Damn," Kevin said when he looked in the mirror, "I already feel better."

When they were back in the truck, Ian said, "Old Navy is next. We are going to stay pretty basic and purchase items that can mix and match. The three Fs are the key to looking cool: fit, function, and fun. Fit means it looks good on you. If it shows off your assets and hides your deficits, then it fits you. Function means that it's comfortable, durable, and provides for proper movement. Fun means that when people look at you your clothes say: hey, I think it would be fun to hang with that guy."

"Are you making this up," Kevin asked.

"Yep, we Scots can give the Irish a run when it comes to bullshit, but I promise you will be a new man when you walk into Salt Fork High on Monday."

Joe and Tyler said they were headed off to Staples to shop for school supplies and would be back in an hour. Once in the store Ian asked Kevin what his favorite color was.

"Blue."

"Figures, all you straight guys are into blue. Okay, this is what we are going to do. We don't have a lot of time and we are building a basic look, so we are getting you three graphic Ts, three polos, three short sleeve prints, and a long sleeve white dress shirt. You can pick out the graphic Ts, but I get a veto, and only one can be blue."

When Kevin returned with his picks, Ian looked at them. Kevin had chosen a blue camo T, a grey Batman T, and a black Dunder Mifflin T. "A bit lacking in color," Ian said and grabbed a mint green T and burnt orange T. "Here are the shirts I picked for you. What do you think?"

Ian noticed that Kevin was having trouble with one of his picks. It was a navy blue polo with pink flamingos. "What's wrong?" Ian asked.

"I don't know if this shirt is my style."

"What, you think pink flamingos are too gay?"

"That's not what I mean--well, maybe a little. I'm sorry. Don't hate me."

"I don't hate you because you've been brought up to think pink is gay, but I know that girls like boys who aren't afraid to wear pink. Besides, pink flamingos are cultural icons and beat the hell out of smiley faces or skulls."

"Well, if you say girls like guys in pink, I'm all in. I really would like a girlfriend, or just a friend who is a girl."

Next, Ian helped Kevin pick out shorts, jeans, dress pants, shoes, socks and underwear. When Joe and Tyler returned, Ian said, "I hope this isn't too much."

"Kevin," Joe said, "your Aunt Claudia gave me more than enough money to cover this and new shoes. Also, Tyler picked out a new book bag for you and filled it with school supplies, so you are all set for Monday." At the shoe store, Tyler and Ian helped Kevin pick out new Nike trainers, some nice boat shoes, and a pair of dress shoes.

When they got back to Kevin's home Claudia couldn't believe how the new haircut changed Kevin's look. He was so excited he had to show his aunt all of his new clothes, but Claudia's biggest smile was the result of seeing Kevin's new attitude.

When Ian went to help Kevin lay out the outfit he would wear to school on Monday Claudia looked at Joe and Tyler and said, "Ian and you boy's saved Kevin, and you gave me back my niece. My niece made a bad pick in Kevin's' father, but she stuck with it, even though it was hard and wore her down. I thought Kevin would grow up to be like his father, but now he has Mary's smile and I believe her heart."

Monday is D-Day

Ian had agreed to meet Kevin in Joe's room before the start of school. Students usually met in the cafeteria before school to grab a breakfast or snack and to socialize before the first bell.

Kevin was dressed in his blue polo with pink flamingos, tan khaki shorts, and leather boat shoes. Ian looked at him and said, "One more thing." He reached into his book bag, grabbed a tin of styling clay and worked it into Kevin's hair, "There, that gives you a bit of a bad boy look."

"I don't know," Kevin said, "When I looked in the mirror this morning, I couldn't believe this was me, but do you really think some new clothes will change how people see me?"

"Nope, the new clothes are about changing how you see yourself. Of course, people will notice the new look and hopefully that will open them up to giving you a second chance, but if you are Dowl rather than Kevin, it won't matter how you look."

When Ian and Kevin entered the cafeteria, Kevin started to head to the table in the corner that had been his solitary prison for the last three years. Ian grabbed his arm and said, "Oh no, it's time for you to jump into the deep water." Ian took Kevin over to the "jock table" where Avery Anders, starting quarterback, was holding court.

Ian said, "Hello everyone, I would like to introduce you to Kevin Hobbs." Everyone was quiet and looked at Kevin then at Avery, not sure what was going on. Finally, Avery stood up, smiled, reached out with his hand, and said "It's good to meet you Kevin."

Terry Shaw started to say , "`Wait, isn't this Dow...." Zach Hill gave Terry an elbow to the ribs and said under his breath, "don't be a twat."

"But I don't get it," Terry said.

"That's why you play defensive line," Avery said, and everyone laughed.

Kevin smiled and said, "Frankly, I don't get it either. After the way I treated Ian last week, he still decided to help me change not just my name and my image, but also my heart. This weekend was like an episode of Queer Eye for the Straight Asshole."

Ian and Kevin burst into laughter when they heard one of the cheerleaders whisper to a friend, "Finally there's one cute straight boy in this town."