This is a fictional tale about the very hot guy I met on an online poetry site. I myself love poetry, and love how poets can be so passionate. This is a retell of this stud from my past tale. Pee out talks online I assumed he is straight (but friendly). Whatever the case he is hot as hell.
Here's to you Hodak...
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Poetic Ginger (Words of A Poet (1)
I could not believe it. I fell deeply for a Josh. Deep and hard for him. And only based off his words. Well before I ever met the man. How do you ask. How can you fall for someone you have never really met. well it's easy (at least I think so). All you need to hear is a kinda word, a kind voice that gives you assurance and makes you feel special in some way. And Josh did that for me. He was the words that brought me up when I was in a state, his was the voice when we started to connect that made me feel better about myself. So of course you can fall for someone without meeting them in person. And that was what I had with him other than his words and such that and the one picture on his page where we met. I knew little of this generous and sweet man.
"Joshua" I said softly when I first started to have an emotional connection with him "My Josh"
He was of course not my Josh. Joshua was straight. At least that's what I got from him through conversations and such we started to have. That and his poetry that he posted. Oh did I say I met him on an online poetry site. A place where like minds would release themselves through the written words. And this site was very much a place for me to just release. As I have had many a disappointment in my life, I had found that the written words was a help. Just spitting out the thoughts that lingered in my head on paper. Then sent for others to read and comment on. Some good, some bad, and from what he had told me once, inspired. I had been on this site for many years now. Occasionally posting my short poems to get some feedback. Usually they were dark and filled with pain and loneliness. But that seems to be what I write best. Despair and that type of sonnet. I had received a comment back from Josh (his screen name is Hodak) I was in a very dreary place when I posted a poem about how utterly deep my loneliness was. Josh saw it, read it and then sent me back a comment on my poem. Four short rhyming verses and a simple structure. But this wonderful man sent back a message to me that read:
"Don't let them get to you friend" it read "They aren't worth the time you spent on them"
I saw the message. It was signed Hodak. I appreciated his kind words. Then looked at the image of the ginger bearded man that was his avatar. He was fairly good looking from what I saw. But I saw in his face image the face of a good guy. I first replied with a heart felt 'thank you'. Then I went on to his profile. Seeing that he too was a poet. And he took wrote in darkness sometimes. Poems that seemed to reflect the same feeling I had about live and relationship and such.
"Brilliant" I said as I read one of them.
I sent him a message on his poetry. Telling him how great his work was. How I loved the flow of his work. From line to line, from the sense that I took could feel his pain, his anguish.
"Your work is masterfully sir" I said to him "It hits the mark right on" "Brilliant"
Then I found myself reading most of his works in one afternoon sitting. Enjoying what I felt was master work in the written words. I had little expectation he would read my messages, but he did. Replying back to me in kind. He said that he also went back to read more of my work and found mine deep and emotional, if somewhat dark. But adding how he understood.
"Life is a shit sometimes" he said back "And we sometimes find ourselves alone in this great big world" "But know that you are not alone my friend" "There is always someone that will come in and bring a smile to you. Even it's but a brief one" "At least here in this community"
Then he proceeded to send me his private email info, with a note, 'if you just need an ear'. His message did make me smile. I appreciated the guy being so ind and willing to lend an ear. Although I did not see myself actually hitting him up for it. It was just something I did not do. Talking up strangers like that. I want much of an extrovert. And for my part I did not communicate with him. That was until he sent me a message one day. I wasn't expecting him to reach out. But Josh did. He seemed to be checking up on me.
"Hey there friend" it started "Just seeing how you are" "Have not seen you post. Hope you are well"
I was surprised by the message, but found it very nice of the guy to check up. He probably wanted to make sure I was not suicidal after the dark poetry I recently had written. His message did make me smile a bit. Just like he said. So I replied to the man. Telling him I was okay. That I just have not been able to sign in as of late. 'busy with work' I said back. So I sent the message and then waited his reply. Realising I had never sent him back my email address. Making sure I added that to it too. Then a few hours later I did receive an email from him. He wanted to chat me up some. Wanting to know more about me. I ended up talking to him online. After a few emails back and forth he lead me to a chat room where we could talk 'real time'. And I found myself really opening up to this guy. Life and love and disappointments. Finding that he too has had some difficult times. Ex-military that was dumped my his wife when he went off to war. Then coming back to hard times and a disconnect with people he used to call friends.
"That sucks" I said as I saw what he said
I felt ever so sorry for him now. His life has been seemingly worse than mine. And that was saying a lot. I found that the more we talked the greater I liked our online connection. He always has a kind word when I was not in a good place. And I took tried to bring up his spirits as well. Especially some months after we first started to chat. Issues in his marriage.
"She doesn't understand how the darkness can consume me" he said "Just says to get over it. Or to go see someone." "I am not crazy"
He would pause again and then ask that same question of me.
"Am I?"
I immediately jumped on to defend him from the onslaught of those that did not understand depression and those feelings of gloom that fell over someone. I came to his side as it were. Telling him he had nothing to be ashamed of. That the weight of this could be a huge burden. But he had people that cared for him. At least i did. That I knew for myself. For this stranger that I had been chatting with many times had touched me deeply. With his comments and words. I knew that I had become smitten by him. Always on the watch in anticipation for our next online chat. The face in his image I studied intently. A gave that I was happy to see each day. So any attack on him was unwarranted and must be stopped.
"I am always here if you need someone to talk to" I said to him "Thanks my friend" he replied "And you too. I am here for you too"
I sighed as he signed off again. Looking at his image and feeling a tingle inside me. Yeah I was smitten by Josh. Big time.... +++
To be continued