Perfect

Ok Guys here's the newest chapter. I made an effort to write twice as much for JWSmith, I hope it satisfies your carving for now. Thanks to everyone for your positive comments, I'll try to keep up with giving you chapters quickly.

Perfect

~ Chapter 6 ~

Flashback Gabriel's POV

The trip to France was one made in a state of shock. I paid no attention to anything around me. The only thing I was aware of was the coldness that claimed my heart. Three weeks ago I was a part of family, a dysfunctional one yes, but a family none-the-less. Now I was banished to this mausoleum.

At first I thought that eventually my mom would change her mind and everything would go back to normal, but no amount of begging and crying would change my fate. When Doug had demanded to know why she was sending me away, she had brought him into the other room and after 5 minutes they returned. Doug wouldn't look at me after that, it was then that I resigned myself to leaving.

So here I was, sitting in a large room, consisting of a bedroom and living area complete with a computer table and private bath. At least being rich bought me privacy.

They hadn't even taken me here, just dropped me off at the airport and gave me a credit card to buy whatever I needed. Saying goodbye to Connor had been impossible of course, he was sent next door again. When we were pulling out of the driveway I had saw him riding his bike with his friends, without a care in the world. He had no idea I wasn't coming back.

A knock sounded at the door before a gray-haired man, dressed in a dark blue suit walked in.

Upon arriving a butler had escorted me to my room, after that no one else had crossed my path because it was 12am and everyone else, I suppose, was asleep.

"Mr. McNeil?" he asked his voice gruff as if he didn't want to there.

"It's Greywolf, Mr. McNeil is my stepfather," I growled with obvious distaste. My mother for the longest time has tried to erase every trace of my father from my life. She was ashamed of marrying a poor Blackfoot Indian horse breeder, but never have I shun my name or heritage and I wasn't going to start now.

The man looked at me curiously taking in my facial structure. I guess he must have noticed my half-breed status in my features because he suddenly stiffened.

"Very well, Mr. Greywolf then, I'm Headmaster Hogan. I wanted to welcome you to Westchester Academy."

"I didn't choose to come here." I said, my tone rude.

"Well," he said stiffly. "You're here now and you'll have to adhere to rules here. We have a uniform; you'll find them in your closet. Classes starts at 7:25am and ends at 2:30pm, then you'll have study hall until 3:30pm. Your free time will be spent on the grounds. Our facilities provides students with many activities, I'm sure you can find something that interests you."

Taking a binder from behind his back he handed it to me. "This provides you with an overview of all our rules. The most important however are leaving the grounds during the school week are grounds for a P.I.N (Personal, Improvement, Notice). If you receive two P.I.N's you will then be expelled. There will be no unauthorized phone calls; lights out is at 11pm. You may leave the compound during weekends but only on authorized visit with a facility member supervising. You also have to sign up in advance in order to go. Lists of events are posted on our website. Do you have any questions?"

"No," I whispered.

"Ok, you'll find your schedule in the binder as well as a map. I suggest you get some sleep, your going to have a busy day." He turned to leave, then paused. "Oh, and by the way, your going to have to get a haircut, we can't have you looking like a savage."

"No!" I stated my whole body rebelled against the notion. I've been growing my hair since my father died, it was my last connection to him and I would never let it go, not for anyone.

"You'll do as you're told Mr. Greywolf." He drew himself up and puffed his chest with his self-importance.

"No!" I stated. "I won't, if you think its necessary, expel me now, because my hair isn't going to change." My voice was unyielding.

"Don't try to my patients Mr. Greywolf, you will find I don't do well with rude individuals such as yourself." With that he stalked out of the room, his face red with anger.

I couldn't figure out whom I felt more sorry for, him or me. His life must be really empty for him to force his will on others.

Not bothering to change my clothes I crawled into bed, and willed myself to fall asleep.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I woke the next day to the sound of chirping. Rolling over, I forced my aching lids to open. At first I didn't know where I was, I just saw a room with unpacked suitcases all over the place. Then it all came back to me with crystal clarity, and I sigh because I knew this day would not be a good one. Groggily I walked to the bathroom to take a shower.

The uniform consisted for chocolate brown trousers, white shirt, with a brown and orange tie. The gray jacket was optional, but everything else, I'm guessing wasn't. Pulling on my clothes, I headed to class.

This campus was designed by an idiot, I'm sure of it, getting from the dorms to this building took me getting lost 3 times, but finally I found it. However for the last 20 minutes I'd been searching for the room 121 but the map didn't make any sense and no else was late for class so I was alone. Walking slowly towards the side doors, I finally noticed that outside there was a building, on it was a sign: Art Studio. Ok, art was my first class so it had to be there.

The building was shaped like an upside down Hershey kiss. Tentatively I opened the door. Students were sitting at easels in a circle, with a man posing in middle; they all turned to look at me. The room smelled like paint and chalk. A man in his early thirties was bending down to talk to a student; he straightened and came towards me.

He wasn't what I expected. His hair was bright red, cut short, and his build was lean and small. Turquoise-framed glasses surrounded his bright blue eyes.

"Gabriel?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry I'm late." I said

"I'm Mr. Paterson," he said, holding out his hand. "Did you get lost?"

"Yes," I said, shaking his hand quickly.

"Ok, but don't let it happen again."

"It won't," I said, my posture becoming defensive ready for another unpleasant encounter.

"Have you taken art before?" he asked.

"Yes." It was actually my favorite subject. The only time I found I could express my thoughts, moods, feelings were on a canvas.

"Right now, we're doing some free style painting. You can use any technique you want, while painting the subject." He said, pointing to the model.

"All right."

"There is an easel set up for you, put on a smock and get to work." He said. "Next time you might want to wear something causal and change into uniform after class."

Smiling he turned to the class. "Guys this is Gabriel Greywolf, he's new so be nice."

"Hi!" Everyone said simultaneously.

"Hey!" I said.

Grabbing a smock, I pulled it over my head and made my way towards my easel. I sat between two boys; one with brown hair, the other with blond, both smiled at me then turned back to their work. Picking up a brush I rubbed the bristles, testing the smoothness. Gradually I began to paint.

The bell shocked me out of my trance. The class had gone by in a blur. Time usually did when I had I brush in my hand; sadly I put down my brush and began to clean up.

"You did well, today." Mr. Paterson said, coming up behind me.

"Thank you," I said shyly.

"Have you been painting long?" he asked

"Since I was 8." I replied.

"You must have had a good teacher." He stated.

"Yeah, my dad taught me. But he said I had a natural gift with paint, his was wood carving."

"He sounds like a very special man."

"He was." I murmured, my voice filled with yearning.

"I'm sorry." He said, frowning.

"It happened a long time ago."

"My father use to say, when you lose someone you love a part of you dies with them. A essential piece of you seems as if it's lost."

"I lost more than a piece." I muttered under my breath.

"What?" he asked.

"Nothing," I said defensively. "Can I go now."

"Talent is not something I don't like to see wasted, I just hope your stay here won't cause you to lose your love for art." He said eerily as if he knew everyone of my problems. He reached over to touch my shoulder and look in me the eye. "This school isn't an easy one, and it may get hard for you but I want you to know if you need someone to talk to, you can come to me, ok?"

"Yes, sir." I said awkwardly.

"Just call me Mr. P."

"Yes, Mr. P." I said smiling.

Laughing he shook his head. "Go on to your next class."

"Bye."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Present Day- Gabriel's POV

Books were a place I found immense satisfaction. Art books especially filled me with inspiration. That's why I found myself in the local book story, looking for something that would catch my attention.

Running my finger over the large brown volumes, I smiled remembering the times I spent studying books like these.

It has been two weeks since I saw Connor, though I've thought of him almost everyone of those days, I made didn't call him. He however has called several times leaving messages for me to call him. I remember the first time I came home and checked my messages, only to hear his voice filling my house.

"Hey it's me, Connor. Are you there? If you are pick up the phone." His voice paused. "Ok I guess I missed you, I want to talk some more, call me."

Temporally I had let go my breath, thinking the message was over, the next message was he again.

"I want us to be friends again Gabriel, remember Quackers, I still have him. Wouldn't like you to see him. Call me."

Oh, he was playing dirty now, I thought to myself. Quackers was a goldfish we won at a fair the first Christmas I came home from Westchester. I slipped out one night because I was feeling suffocated in the house and Connor had followed me. We ended up playing games, going on rides; it was the most fun I had in awhile. I felt freer in those few hours than I had in all those months away.

"Oh, I'm not going to give up." His voice sounded on the machine again. "Just thought I'd warn you. I won't let you avoid me."

Aggravated I'd stomped off to my studio in order to release my frustration. I couldn't however stop the small fluttering of hope that befouled my heart.

The memory brought I smile to my face now as I brought a book to the counter to pay.

"Well shit! If it ain't Gabriel!"

Gabriel raised his gaze to the laughter of Elaine Armstrong. Elaine was a good old gal from Georgia; She was small about 5'2. She had the face of a pixy, small brown eyes, and a heart shaped face. She was my secretary, well personal assistant actually. If it weren't for her I wouldn't be able to find my head. I noted with surprise that she changed her usually conservative slacks and button done shirt, for a floaty skirt and T-shirt.

"What're you doing in this part of town, Elaine?" I offered an easy grin.

"Meetin' some friends for a baby shower." She held up a book. "Decided to buy a book for Tommy."

"Where's the little scamp?"

"Over there," she said, pointing to bookshelves. "Barely recognized you, I haven't seen a lot of you in the office lately."

A blush covered my face. "I've been busy."

"Mmmm," She murmured non-commentary.

I knew what that Mmm, meant. Elaine was my friend, my only friend actually. She was the only person at my company who knew I was gay, the only person who knew about Connor.

"Don't," I said, knowing what was coming.

"Don't what?" she asked with false innocence.

"It won't work Elaine, I don't want to talk about it." Grabbing my book, I made my way to the door.

"Wait, let's have coffee."

"What about Tommy?" I said, grasping for anything that would keep me from having this talk.

"Ava will watch him." Walking over to a woman sitting by the window, she whispered something in her ear. Next she went toward Tommy.

"Gabriel!" Tommy said excited as he looked over to see me. "Mom, Gabriel's here." At thirteen, he stood a couple of inches shorter than me, wasn't as muscular, and Elaine kept his hair cut short.

Warmth light Tommy's eyes as he smiled at me. Tommy was unusually intelligent for his age, he was actually a senior in high school, and found it hard to make friends so he was usually very shy.

"Did you see the book Mom bought for me?"

"Yeah, I did."

"It's on criminology, that's what I want to do when I grow up." He said smiling.

"That's cool."

"Honey I'm going to have coffee with Gabriel next door. Ava is here, if you want anything more, she'll get it for you."

"Kay." He said.

Wearily I followed Elaine next door, taking a seat in the corner.

"Ok, Spill." She ordered.

"What, no how are you doing Gabriel? Are you healthy?" I said sarcastically.

"You look like shit, so I know you're not fine. Your also stronger than an ox, so why don't you tell me why you've been avoiding me. Did it go that bad?"

"Worst." I spent the next 30 minutes outlining the events that took place the last few weeks. She reacted with outrage on my behalf, of course.

"Asshole," she muttered angrily.

"I know."

"Stupid, Snobbish, Asshole."

"Yep."

"Well honey, your just going to dust yourself off and try again. They're lots of nice men out there. You just have to make yourself available, no more sitting at home instead of going out."

"I tried the club scene, I don't like it. Too much fucking and not enough real relationship come out of it.

"Why don't you aleast try, you never know." She said, trying to be encouraging.

"I don't know."

"Hon, if you're going to mope over Connor you might as well aspect his apology and talk to him."

My glare expressed my revulsion for that idea.

"Are you sure you---"

"Yes!" I stated, not allowing her to finish.

"Don't bite my head off. Just make sure you can't actually forgive him, and give him a chance, before you go jumping into a new relationship with someone else. Your unresolved feelings might come back and kick you in the ass." She warned.

Even though her words rung with truth, I couldn't aspect them. There was no way I was about to let him into my life again. "I'm over it."

"You've been in love him your entire life. Come on Gabriel, don't lie to yourself." She said sadly.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Paradise was the most popular gay club in Toronto. It was always filled with single guys looking for a quick fuck or for some fun. I should be having the time of my life, but instead I found myself, sitting at the bar sipping my third beer and remembering why I hated clubs. Guys hit on me of course, some even bypass talking and just grabbed my cock. My scowl must have scared them away because now they were just staring at me. There was too much noise, too many bodies searching for comfort; this led to a quiet desperation in the air. I've done my share of club hopping in my younger days, but I think that I've out grown it.

With that in mind I paid my tab and made my way to the door. A hand tapped me on the shoulder. I turned to face him.

"You must be the guy that has the queens panties in a twist." He looked me up and down, taking in my appearance with obvious interest. "I can see why."

He smiled as my blush. "How sweet, I didn't know people still did that." He ran his figure down my cheek.

"So what's you name mystery man?"

"Gabriel."

"I'm Adrian, you leaving?" he inquired.

"Yeah"

"Oh, the queens didn't drive you away did they? They're grabby but harmless," he stated.

"No, this just isn't my scene." I said.

"Do you want to go get something to eat?" he asked.

The question made me take a better look at him. He was medium height, and built. His dark brown fell over his eyes. He smiled with dimples. He was definitely my type, so why not? I asked myself. This might lead somewhere.

"That would be nice."

We ended at Mama's Pizzeria, a small Italian restaurant with the best pizza in Toronto. After ordering a pizza, we began to exchange information about ourselves. He was a high school English teacher. 24 years old (same age as me), single, lived in Mississauga another district but closer to Brampton than Toronto. He liked fine Canadian literature, wine, and me. He made that clear with his overt flirting.

"Do you mind me asking, why you're single?" He questioned.

"I haven't found the right person." I said.

"Maybe I can change that," he said, rubbing his knees against mine.

My body tensed at first. It's been awhile since anyone touched me in a sensual manner. A touch that didn't involve sex but interest in me as a person.

I smiled at him shyly keeping my thoughts to myself.

"Are you asking me out?" I asked coyly.

"Maybe," he said slyly.

Reaching over he touched my fingers, tracing the tips. His touch sent shivers down my spine. Sliding himself beside me in the booth, he leaned into me for a kiss. Nuzzling his lips against my cheek, he then pecked the corner of my mouth. He pulled away and grinned wickedly.

"That's all you get until, we have a real date. I'm not easy, you know?"

I laughed, I couldn't help myself.

"Ok, a date it is."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Connor's POV

Gabriel still hasn't called me, which made my week suck. Everyday I would come home and immediately check my messages only to find none from him. I felt like shit, I wanted to talk to him. Panic filled me when I thought of not seeing him again entered my mind; I tried hard not to examine it. I mean I think he's sexy but that didn't mean anything right? I didn't like him did I? It would be too weird, too complicated. But no amount of reasoning stopped my heart from hoping to hear from him.

That's how I ended up at Mama's Pizzeria with Hunter. My depression drove him to the drastic measure of almost kidnapping me and forcing me out of my apartment.

"I've had enough of your mopping." He'd said before literally dragging me into his car.

After eating my favorite chicken pizza, I felt marginally better and energized. I wasn't going to give up, I was going to get Gabriel to notice me, no matter what.

"Oh la la!" Hunter said suddenly.

"What?" I asked, trying to see who or what he was looking at but there was huge plant blocking my view.

"There is a yummy guy over there, but he seems to be taken," he said disappointedly.

"Are you always checking out men?"

"Yes, your problem is that you don't check out enough men?"

"Hey, just because I don't think with my dick doesn't mean there is anything wrong with me."

"Ha, your dick is probably hiding because of your lack of interest in getting it off." He said.

"Fuck you."

"I know you would but I'm not interested."

Rolling my eyes I got up to use the bathroom, only to be stunned frozen mid-motion. There kissing some guy was Gabriel. Well they weren't kissing, but they were close to doing it. My breath came in out in rapid pants. My throat felt tight, and I couldn't think. I couldn't.., this couldn't.., I had to get out of here.

Spinning around, I flung myself outside hoping he didn't see me, that he wouldn't realize he affected me that way, if he did.

I began to walk, that turned into a full-blown run. I don't know how far I ran or in which direction. I just couldn't stop; I had to get away from this feeling. This burning jealously that seemed to consume me. Suddenly my left leg cramped up, I cried out with pain. Grabbing my leg I dragged myself to a nearby stoop to sit down. Tucking my head between my legs, I tried to calm my thumping heart.

"Jesus Connor what the hell is wrong with you?" asked a disgruntled voice.

I didn't say anything, I couldn't my mind was reeling.

"Look at me!" Hunter screeched. "You scared the shit out of me."

I raised my eyes to him. What he saw on my face stopped his rant. His anger evaporated and it was replaced by concern.

"What's wrong honey?" He bent down in front of me and cupped my face in his hands.

"I-I di-didn't know, I didn't know." I whimpered shaking my head. I realized then that there were tears running down my face.

"Didn't know what? You're scaring me," he said.

"It was him."

"Him who? Dammit make sense." He growled.

"Gabriel," I managed to gasp out.

"Gabriel? What about Gabriel? Did you see him?" he questioned urgently

I nodded, "He was the yummy guy."

"Ok, ok, but why are you upset."

"I didn't know, I swear Hunter I didn't know."

"You didn't know he was gay, but that doesn't explain anything."

I shook my head dumbly like a small child that couldn't comprehend what was happening.

"H-e, I , I , Dammit." I stammered out not being able to say it.

"I think I love him Hunter, I think I always have. That's why I got so angry with him when I thought he was trying to hurt Dad. I expect better of him because he's always been my hero. I didn't know."

Understanding seemed to dawn on Hunter as he pulled me into a hug.

We stayed like that for what seemed like hours. Him comforting me, lending me his strength. Most people would ask why we've never been together, but we were more like brothers than anything. Sleeping with him would feel like incest, but at times like these when I wanted physical comfort, to lose myself in someone, I wish that we could.

"What am going to do?" I asked tiredly

"Are you sure about this?"

"When I was seven I ran away from home because I thought my father forgot my mother's birthday. Gabriel found me, sleeping behind mom's grave stone. He didn't yell at me or treat me like a baby. He simply tucked me into his lap and waited for me to wake up. When I did he showed me the flowers my dad planted by mothers grave." I closed my eyes in remembrance. "Your father loves your mother." He said to me."

"That's probably when I started to love him, but I didn't recognize it. I hid it deep inside myself. Seeing him with that guy nearly ripped out my heart. I couldn't breath, couldn't think, I just wanted to run up to him and yell at him for being with someone else." I finished with groan, realizing how possessive I sounded.

"You need to plan your moves carefully, fir--"

I cut him off. "What if that's his boyfriend, they could be serious. I can't break them up."

"No," Hunter said shaking his head. "I've seen that guy he was with before, he was at club on Saturday flirting with me. He's either cheating or they just met."

"You sure?" I asked hesitantly not wanting to get my hopes up.

"Very sure." He replied. "So here's what we're going to do..."

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

It was going to be a beautiful day, I thought to myself walking in the kitchen to make a pot of coffee. Last night had been fun, meeting Adrian was an unexpected pleasure especially after Con--, No I scolded myself. I wasn't going to let anything ruin my mood. It was Saturday; my day off and I had a date with Adrian. Grinning I felt my cock get hard with thoughts of him.

The doorbell sounded, shifting my dick in my sweat pants I tried to cover my obvious hard-on. Opening the door brought an unexpected surprise. Connor stood on my doorstep, his face expressing worry.

"Your secretary told me where you live."

I cursed Elaine for her busybody ways. She was going to have a lot to answer.

"Come in," I said

"Thanks."

"Do you want some coffee?" I asked. I was turning over a new leaf, if Connor wanted to play nice I would, that doesn't mean I was going to go out of my way to see him. I just wasn't going to get into a fight with him when I did.

Handing him a cup of coffee, I asked. "What brings you by?"

"I brought you a present."

He handed me a small fish bowl I hadn't noticed him carrying.

"Quackers?" I said excitedly.

"Yeah," he said smiling.

In the tank swam the small goldfish. "He's big."

"He eats too much."

"Crackers?" I asked jokingly.

"No, he eats fish food now." He replied.

When we had gotten the fish we tried to hide it from the parents because we couldn't explain, without getting in trouble, where it came from. We therefore couldn't buy it food; so we just crumbled crackers and gave it to him, hence the name Quackers.

"I want you to have him."

"What?" I exclaimed. "You love this fish, I couldn't take it."

"NO, you won him, you should have him."

"Connor what is this really about?"

"I need to talk to you."

"About what?" I asked wearily.

"I want to tell you the truth."

"Your not afraid I'm going to use it against you?" I asked sarcastically. When I saw the hurt flash in his eyes I knew I shouldn't of, but I couldn't help it.

"Gabriel please, would you just listen to me?" he said while looking down at the floor.

"Sorry," I muttered.

"Do you know how your mom got my dad to give up most of our money and the house?"

"Not really, all I know is she threatened him with something." I said, not sure where this was leading.

He sat down, eyes focused outside on the lake. "I didn't know either until things got really bad but my dad is BI-sexual and he had a lover."

"What?" I gasped my mind reeling.

"His name was Nicholas James." He paused to turn and look at my surprised face. "Yeah, he was running for governor but dropped out of the race suddenly, divorced his wife and fell off the face of the earth.

"Why?" I asked.

"She hired a private investigator to fallow dad, and found out. She lost it then, I guess she couldn't stand the thought of being married to a BI man. She was cheating on him of course, so she couldn't divorce him for adultery but blackmail was easier anyway. She went to Nick's wife; she left him when she found out, taking all of his money. Your mom then went after dad, threatening to tell the press if he didn't give into her demands. My dad loved Nick and of course conceded, not wanted to put either of us through the public scorn. Nick had to give up his dream of being governor and when dad broke it off with him, that was the final straw."

He stopped talking as if trying to put feeling that were inexpressible into words. "He tried to commit suicide, my dad found him covered in his own blood. He'd shot himself in th-e h-e-ad." Tears began to flow down his face. I couldn't help it I had to comfort him.

Pulling him off the chair, I sat down and sat him in my lap. He cuddled in my lap, like he did when he was little, rubbing his nose against my ear, then hiding his face in the crook of my neck.

"Dad, tried to stop the bleeding but there was so much blood, and he was convulsing from shock. When he finally got to the hospital no one expected him to make it through surgery alive. He did though but with a bullet preminiatly implanted in his head. He suffered brain damage and lost most ability to use his legs, doctors think he might have lost most of his memory but we can't be sure because he mysteriously disappeared from the hospital one night and hasn't been seen again."

Locking his arms around my back his body began to shake with the force of his sobs.

"Shh, Shh, I'm here Connor, everything is going to be alright." Smoothing my hand over his hair, I kissed the top of his head.

"It's alright baby, you don't have to talk about."

"No, I'm ok, you need to know the rest before." He stopped not finishing his sentence.

As he continued his voice was emotionless, as if it hurt to feel anything.

"My dad knew she did it somehow but couldn't prove it, so he spent most of what money he had left to hire a private investigator in order find Nick. The only lead he got was that Nick was somewhere here in Toronto. So he brought us here.

He kept on looking but found nothing and with every disappointment came drinking. It was unnoticeable at first, but then when he started on drugs, he began to forget to go to work. He started have violent outburst, not towards me but towards himself. Punching mirrors, walls, getting in bar fights, anything to hurt himself. I didn't have a dad I had drug addict. I had to take care of myself, and make excuses for him missing parent teacher meeting because I was embarrassed."

"Connor" I murmured sympathetically.

He continued as if I hadn't spoken. "That didn't last long of course. When I was 12, my math teacher tried to call my dad and talk to him about signing me up for advanced courses, because I was so good at it but he couldn't he reach him. I was shocked when Mr. Thompson, showed up at my house during one of my dad's outbursts. They took me away from him for 6 months. For 6 months I lived in a foster home with strangers, afraid I wouldn't see my dad again; afraid I was going to end up alone. Hunter's family took me out of there when they found out what was going on. My dad and I lived with them until he got better. Those were the most painful years of life."

I didn't say anything for awhile, I couldn't. What do you say to that? How do you express sympathy? And my mom was the reason for this tragedy. Another life destroyed at her hands.

He suddenly pulled away from me, walking to the window to stare again at the water.

"It's beautiful here." He said, breaking the silence.

"Thank you."

"I know you would never do anything to hurt me, I was just upset by the very thought and lashed out. I know why now."

"Why?"

"Because I love you."

The world seemed to stop in that moment.

"Is this some kind of joke?" I asked my voice quivering.

"I think I've loved you most of my life but I hadn't known until I saw you with him."

"Who?" I asked perplexed, nothing seemed to make sense.

"Some guy at Mama's," he said, searching my eyes for something.

"Oh, but how?" I asked.

"Dinner with Hunter." He said. "I couldn't stand watching you with him, I felt like some one pushed me in the stomach, I hadn't known I loved you 'till then."

He had to be lying; there was no way this could be true. He didn't love me, he couldn't.

"STOP saying that," I yelled. "You don't love me Connor, I don't know what this is but you need to stop."

He came to me then, he was almost 4 inches shorter than I was but he looked me in the eye.

"I love you." He stated unflinching his eyes filled with warmed.

"I've met some one, I don't have room for you in my life, expect for a friend." I said desperately.

"You don't want me?" he asked.

"No," I said shakily.

"Lair," he chided.

"I did when I was young and foolish but not now." The lie rolling out of my mouth. This was self-preservation, I would tell all the lies I had to make this go away.

"Young and foolish enough to think I'm hot?" he inquired. "I guess you don't consider yourself young and foolish now?"

Shaking my head, I backed away, his arm shot out stopping me. I moved back again only to bump into the Kitchen Island.

I twisted around, trying to move in the other direction, but his other arm came up, trapping me against the side of the island. I swallowed, looked up at him with as fearless a look as I could muster.

"This isn't funny." There was a slight quaver in my voice, one I hoped he didn't notice. The only way I could escape this situation was to show no vulnerability. I wouldn't let him hurt me again. His long legs were brushing up against my sweats, and I could feel the warmth of his body in through the cloth. Too close. Much too close.

"Why are you so skittish around me? If I didn't know better I'd say you were downright terrified."

I didn't move. Not that I could, with his arms trapping me against the hard mahogany wood. I knew I was much stronger than he was and was capable break his hold but couldn't do that without risking hurting him.

So much for showing no fear, I thought helplessly. It would be a waste of time to deny it. "You make me nervous," I said after a moment.

"Do I? Is it just me, or is it all men?"

"I don't like being pinned against furniture." I said in my coldest voice.

"Why are you afraid of me? What do you think I'll do?

"Absolutely nothing, I just don't like--"

"Touching me? I know your lying." To prove it he pressed his hard cock against me, circling his hips, making it known in no uncertain circumstances that he knew I was harder than an iron-poker.

Shamed by my exposure, "I sure as hell don't like you," I rebuked. "Let me go."

"Convince me," he said voice low.

"What?"

"Convince me," he said again. And to my absolute horror he leaned down to kiss me.

It was just as well I had the island behind me and his arms on either side of me, otherwise I might have slid to the ground in complete astonishment. I tried to duck, but he caught my face in his hands, holding me still as he brought his mouth down on mine, a slow, deliberate kiss, openmouthed, wet, thorough.

He lifted head, paused, giving me time to refuse him, but I couldn't I wanted his kiss. I just wanted things to be different, less complicated. But, it didn't matter what my brain thought. My body, my mouth, my soul wanted him I heard a quiet little sound of desire and knew that it had come from me.

His lips parted, his tongue glistening pink between them. He licked his delectable upper lip.

I moaned his name, but his mouth already there.

Slowly, slowly, their lips closed on each other, their tongues soft, then hard, then soft again. My muscles melted against him, clinging to his body.

He widened his stance, and I rubbed my cock against his erection like a love-starved cat, prolonging the motion until I thought I would go insane. Root to tip, I went, as if measuring him for insertion.

He turned his head to deepen the kiss, thrusting his hands into the crisp, cool waves of my hair. He filled my mouth with his tongue and met nothing but acceptance. A groan of pure male lust rumbled in his chest. He drew my tongue into his mouth and suckled it. His lips imprisoning the soft flesh as his tongue circled and flicked.

My hands reached behind him to cup the firm swell of his ass and pulled him closer. I was drunk on passion but it was becoming difficult to breathe.

He broke off and gasped for air, without the contact of our lips, my senses returned. I shoved him away from me he could kiss me again. Trying to keep some distance.

"Stay away from me," I wheezed out, my heart not yet returning to it's normal beat.

"All you had to do was say no." He said, his eyes hot. There was no mistake the tent in his jeans; I tried to keep my eyes away from it.

"I did."

"No you didn't."

"Well, now I am. Keep your damn hands off me."

"No." He stated. "My hands belong on you. You might not no that now but you will because I'm not giving you up."

"I'm not yours."

"Yes you are, in every way that counts, kid yourself for as long as you want but I'm not going away."

"Yes you will," I said desperately. "I have a date."

"Don't go."

"You have no right to tell me what to do." I said angrily. I hated when I wasn't in control but he kept me so unbalanced and I couldn't gain it back.

"Fine, be a coward, but I'll be all you think about, all you taste, what your cock would be craving." Leaning over he kissed my closed eyelids.

"It's going be ok, baby, I'm to take good care of you." Smiling his parting words before walked away was, "I love you."

Stunned and dumbfounded I didn't move, just touched my aching lips. He was right I could still taste him there, and it was all I could do to keep from coming.

God, Why was this happening to me?

I couldn't dwell on it because I had to meet Adrian for a lunch picnic. Oh, God! How was I going to face him? I asked myself.

Forcing myself to calm down, I repeated that I would forget this and everything would go back to normal.

Maybe Connor was right, I was a coward.

To be Continue...

Not what you expecting I know, but I hope you like how things are progressing. What do you think?