This story contains graphic sexual scenes between males under 18. If material of this nature offends you then you should not read this story.
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This story is purely a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead, or to events that may have occurred, is purely coincidental.
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Paper Cuts Chapter Three
Ren was glad when the dinner was over. It was a different experience eating dinner with Pat with the two girls present. Jen, Pat's girlfriend, and Mindy, her friend from school chatted non-stop. He enjoyed the meal, but would have preferred not to have dined with Mindy. She was constantly trying to touch him and would not let him eat in peace. It got even worse after she found out he was an artist. She wanted him to draw her like Leonardo DiCaprio did Kate Winslet in some movie called Titanic. He wasn't sure what she meant but got the impression it would be very unpleasant.
He was shocked when they said goodnight to the two girls. Mindy made a point to hug him and give him a big wet kiss on the lips, which became worse when she managed to work her tongue inside his mouth. The grape flavored lip gloss tasted like a piece of rotten fruit. Ren wanted to throw up and scrub his face afterwards. It was one of the most disgusting things that had ever happened to him. American girls just seemed so slutty to do such things with boys they barely knew.
"Call me Ren!" Mindy said smiling as she walked off with Jen to catch the bus back to their school. He couldn't believe it, they were still chatting like a couple of parrots as they walked away.
Ren looked nauseous when he turned to face Pat after being kissed. Not believing what had just happened to him. Pat laughed loudly in response to Ren's look of revulsion. For a brief moment he let his protective mask slip and smiled back at Pat sharing an unspoken understanding with his older roommate that Mindy had no chance with him.
They were alone for the first time since the incident in the movie theatre restroom. He felt a great deal of gratitude to the older teen who had allowed him to delete the video Zach had made of him jacking off in the restroom. Ren was still surprised that Pat had made such an effort to do such a thing for him. At his old school in Japan no one would have ever done something like that for him. And he had known a far greater number of the students there and for a much longer period of time. He had attended Funagata Academy since he was ten. He couldn't understand why this American he barely knew would be so kind to him.
"We better get going so we're not late getting back to campus," Pat said with a grin as they began to head back towards St. Philips. "I'm sorry about Mindy, she's...ah...interesting friend of Jen's. She really, really likes artists and you being Japanese is, just a bonus. I'll talk to Jen and makes sure Mindy doesn't bother you at school."
"You don't mean she would come to the campus to pursue me," asked Ren now panicked that this female demon would try and see him again.
Pat laughed briefly at Ren's discomfort, before throwing his arm around the younger boy and pulling him towards as they walked up the hill towards the school campus. "No, not really, but she does like you a lot. I'll make sure she doesn't bother you though, I suspect she isn't quite the type of person you would prefer to date anyway."
The older boy wished things had gone better at the theatre between Zach and Ren. He hoped it was still possible to repair the damage done by Zach's foolish action in the restroom. Pat felt partially to blame, because he hadn't made more of an effort to tell Zach Ren's story in the morning. He only told him to go slow with Ren, but didn't explain all the details of why it was important. Sometimes the younger boy's hormones got the better of him.
He was going to have to talk to Zach as soon as possible to explain everything. Pat wished he could have been able to explain things to Zach as soon as everything had occurred in the restroom, but he couldn't let Ren know he was aware of his past difficulties. He was afraid of how Ren would react now, especially after the bathroom incident. He was afraid the young boy might attempt to injure himself or do something far worse.
The two boys walked slowly back towards their dorm. Pat tried to distract Ren by asking about his upcoming entries into Fall Festival coming up in a couple of weeks. At first Ren didn't really seem to want to talk too much about his artwork, but as they walked along he began to open up. By the time they finally reached their room Ren was freely talking about his artwork.
Pat marveled at how much Ren's personality began to change when he talked about art. It was as if he became a different person. The angst ridden person he was normally completely disappeared and a happy animated person appeared. Pat smiled to himself as he realized this was how to get Ren of his shell. Art was the ticket; he needed to figure out a way to get Zach and Ren together using art. If he could do that there was a possibility of getting them together.
Ren began to finally relax after the disaster at the theatre and dinner as he walked back to the dorm with Pat. He found himself beginning to think of what a good friend Pat was. He had never had a friend quite like him before. Ren had once considered Sugawara no Yukio not only a good friend, but someone he cared very deeply for and felt like he was in love with, until his betrayal. Pat though was something different as a friend. He was respectful, kind and very protective of him. Pat was everything that he imagined an older brother would be like.
Pat walked Ren to the door of their dorm room and then excused himself. He told Ren he would be back before lights out and gave him a tight hug. He smiled warmly at his younger roommate, before heading out to find and talk with Zach. He needed to talk Zach and straighten all the earlier problems from the theatre.
Ren felt better than he had earlier in the evening. Pat had managed to make him feel better after everything that had happened. As he stripped out of his street wear and got dressed for bed his thoughts began to turn to Zach.
Ren could still see Zach's face in his mind's eye, when he apologized for recording him. The pain he saw in Zach's face was real and the boy was indeed very contrite. As he sat on his bed, Ren wished he had forgiven Zach at the time, but it was too late now. Without meaning to he had intentionally inflicted the same pain on Zach that Zach had accidentally inflicted on him. How could he be so cruel to the handsome boy? Zach didn't deserve to suffer for things that others had done to him.
He started gently crying as he grasped his knees to his chest beginning to slowly rock back and forth on his bed. Why did life have to be so difficult and confusing? Ren knew from Zach's expression he was sincerely sorry and hadn't meant to hurt him. Zach's face lacked the cruel frosty appearance he had seen in so many faces in the past from those who sought to subject him to pain.
The only thing Zach had truly been guilty of was pursuing him and stirring up feelings he thought he had managed to exorcise from himself. Ren hated to actually admit, but he couldn't get the handsome fifteen year old out of his mind. He would close his eyes and there was Zach shirtless and dripping sweat as he licked Ren's cum from his finger. That first meeting was forever burned in his mind.
These feelings Zach was stirring up in him were far more intense than those Yukio had stirred up. With Yukio it had been a gentle buildup of feelings that had led to his former friend coaxing him into preforming oral sex on him. He had been tricked into believing it was the logical next step in their relationship to show Yukio how much he cared for him.
In fact Yukio had fallen in with Nakatomi no Harusato, a distant member of the Fujiwara clan, and his purist friends. Haru was jealous of Ren for being related closer to the Imperial family than he was. He also hated the younger Ren for being a half-breed, thus ultimately making the innocent young boy a traitor to Japan because of his un-pure blood. Haru's torment of Ren had begun when he was ten and Haru was twelve. It began almost as soon he discovered who Ren was.
Eventually he had persuaded Yukio to become his friend and betray Ren. Haru had secretly hoped Ren would commit suicide, but Ren proved to be made of sterner stuff. Yukio's last interaction with Ren was shortly after Ren's father's death to tell him the entire story and that he never wished to see a half-blood neko, fag, like him ever again. It had been a crushing blow to him that would have destroyed a weaker boy, but Ren survived this final betrayal.
The young boy became more withdrawn from the world. Everyone assumed it was just the result of Minamoto no Fusasaki's, Ren's father's, violent death. In reality it was the multiple blows of his beloved father's death, his perceived disgrace of his family line, the betrayal of his best friend and his public humiliation at his school. People were cruel, so Ren decided to withdraw inside himself and do the best he could to survive until he was old enough to pursue a career in art. No one cared if an artist was a loner, so he would be finally safe.
Zach, with his prefect body, bubbly and daring personality and close proximity was disrupting all his careful plans of avoiding everyone. Everywhere Ren turned there he was again. If he wasn't seeing the beautiful boy on the grounds of the campus, he was seeing him in classes and the gym. Worst of all, Zach was now entering his thoughts and dreams.
Ren felt himself beginning to ache with desire for the other boy. It was wrong he knew, but he couldn't help it. Why had this happened? Pat, he could understand, realizing it was physical attraction, since the boy paraded around half-naked or completely naked in the room all the time and seemed to be a very sexual creature. Zach though, was something completely different. He wanted things from him that he knew would only lead to heart break and finally being tormented and ostracized by the others at St. Philips like back at Funagata Academy.
Finally Ren got off the bed and washed his face in some cool water from the room's small sink. He stared at himself in the mirror trying to understand why someone like Zach would want to even want to be friends with him. He wasn't anything special, no matter what his mother said.
He wasn't big, he only 5'6" and 110 lbs. though he was very toned from swimming and playing water polo, but he was certainly not built like Zach's 5'9", 135 lbs. muscular lacrosse player body. Plus what made things even worse he was what American's called a geek, if that was the right term, he had skipped ninth grade and been advanced to the tenth grade because of his academics. He felt extra out of place with all the older students. He was surprised though none of the students in his classes seemed to mind and in class treated him just as if he truly belonged there with them.
After he stared at himself for a good long time he grabbed the book, DRAWING BLOOD, he had started reading the day before from the bookshelf above his bed and settled down to read. He hoped to be able to take his mind off all the things that had happened earlier. He was so captivated by the story he didn't put it down when he went down the hall to grab an iced tea from the vending machine. He felt he should have been shocked when he discovered one of the main characters was bi but preferred guys and the other was a completely non-sexual character, but instead he wanted to read more. Secretly he hoped the one boy would succeed with the other.
Ren started upright in his bed when Pat entered their dorm room. He had become so engrossed in the story he had forgotten where he was.
"Whoa, bro! Sorry about that I didn't mean to startle you," he said with a grin at his younger roommate.
"No, yes, I mean...I'm sorry I was very absorbed in this book and forgot where I was," Ren stammered back at Pat looking at him sheepishly.
Laughing Pat said, "No need to apologize to me," he replied sitting down on Ren's bed. "I'm glad to see you're doing better now," he said reaching over pulling Ren into a tight hug.
At first Ren didn't know what to say or do. Finally he reached around with his pinned arms and hugged Pat back in response around the older boy's waist. Somehow this small gesture made him feel closer to the older boy. Pat was really a very kind boy and he was glad that he was his roommate.
"You know I would do anything for you Ren," Pat said giving him a gentle smile as he pulled back from his hug. "I promise to make sure no one here will ever hurt you, okay?" He said. "You're my lil' bro here," he said playfully poking Ren on the nose.
Ren couldn't help but smile back at him, "Thank you Pat, you are too kind to me. I could not ask for a better older brother," he said humbled by Pat's words.
Pat took a deep breath before continuing, needing to try and see where Ren was concerning Zach. He knew it was risky after everything that had happened earlier, but realized he needed to fix any damage now before it became set in stone and could never be corrected.
"Ren, I know Zach scared and upset you earlier, but he's really very sorry." The older teen paused briefly before continuing, "He sometimes does silly foolish things like what he did to you in the bathroom, but it really wasn't meant to hurt you." Pat paused and waited hoping Ren would understand and believe what he told him. He didn't want to say Zach was gay, because he suspected Ren was still trying to come to terms with his own sexuality and that would only make him more skittish. He tried to give Ren the most sympathetic smile he could.
Ren was afraid to look at Pat, fearing the older boy would see his hidden desire for Zach and would ruin the fragile new born links of friendship and brotherhood he and the older boy were now forging. He knew though Pat was right about Zach being sorry. He didn't doubt that statement for a minute.
Softly Ren whispered, "Yes, I know he is sorry. I am sorry I overrated to what he did." He briefly looked up into the older boy's eyes before dropping them and continuing, "Something I cannot tell you about happened to me before and I do not like being videotaped as a result. I am truly sorry I have caused all this trouble for you," he said not daring to look at Pat. He feared Pat would ask what had happened. He didn't want to risk exposing his horrible secret and lose Pat's friendship if that happened.
Pat grabbed a hold of Ren again and hugged him. "You don't need to talk about it Ren. I promise I will make sure Zach never does anything like that again to you." He felt the younger boy sob against him. Even though he knew this might be too much right now, he still needed to try and save the possible friendship with Zach, while Ren was still malleable.
"I hope you will give Zach another chance to be friends," he whispered in the boy's ear. Pat held Ren in his arms stroking his hair gently before he continued, "I think you could become good friends if you give him a chance and forgive him," he said as he slid his other hand up and down slowly caressing the young boy's back until the sobbing had almost completely stopped. Finally Ren pulled back and looked up into the older boy's kind face.
"Thank you Pat, you are too kind to me," Ren muttered with a small smile as he wiped his eyes. He was terrified at what might happen between him and Zach, but he was willing to try and be friends with Zach for Pat's sake since they seemed to be good friends.
"Yes, I will forgive him and try to be friends with him," he announced with more conviction than he thought possible after all that had happened. Maybe if he did things right, Pat's constant presence would prevent him from doing something foolish with the Zach. Yes, he thought! This would be the perfect way to avoid any possible chance of sexual contact. Having Pat always there would make sure nothing could ever happen. He smiled back at Pat giving him another hug. His problem with Zach was over and he was still safe and his awful secret still hidden.
Pat was pleased things had gone far better with Ren than he could have ever hoped. He hadn't been sure Ren would be so forgiving of Zach knowing the young Japanese boy's horrible past. Maybe now he could more carefully get the two of them together. He knew they would make a good couple and if things went as well as he hoped they would be together for their whole time at St. Philips. It would give Ren someone to love and trust and Zach a steady boyfriend to care for rather than a constant stream of fuck buddies.
As Pat sat there on Ren's bed holding him in his arms, he thought back to the talk he had had with Zach after returning from dinner with Ren and the girls. It was touching to see how Zach reacted to Pat's tale of what had happened to Ren at his old school. The fifteen year old tenth grader broke down and cried not believing someone could be so cruel to the cute adorable Japanese boy.
Zach told Pat was Ren was just too sweet, innocent and pure to have something that horrible done to him after hearing the story. Pat believed it when Zach had told him that he would have left very little of this Sugawara no Yukio unbeaten and unbroken if he had been there at the school with Ren. Pat knew Zach hated homophobes with a passion and had on more than one occasion protected younger or weaker boys from bullies like that. Zach promised Pat he would never hurt Ren like that again and would do anything he could to make it up to Ren.
Zach now wanted his possible relationship with Ren to be more than just love and sex. He wanted it to be a healing process. Zach now more than anything else wanted to help heal Ren of all the pain he had suffered before he had met him. He wanted to show this sweet Japanese boy the world was filled with love and he didn't need to be frightened of who he was. Ren needed to learn there were others like him in the world and it was ok to be who he was and could be loved for who he was. He resolved to begin to his battle for Ren's heart and love as soon as Pat let him know Ren was willing to accept him as a friend.
The bell from Dearborn Hall chimed letting them know it was lights out time. Pat quickly stripped down to his boxers and got into bed. Each boy turned out their desk lamps plunging the room into darkness.
"Good night Ren. Sleep well lil' bro," Pat said feeling better the day had not turned out to be a complete disaster. He drifted to sleep with dreams of Zach and Ren kissing one another and making love.
"Thank you ani, older brother, good night," Ren called softly across the room to Pat feeling pleased at how well the day had actually turned out as he snuggled under the sheets. He smiled to himself as he drifted off to a second night's sleep of peaceful dreams. At last he felt as if his life was returning to normal after so very long.
Sunday at St. Philips was the most relaxed day of the week on campus. Breakfast was optional, so many students slept in until almost noon. Ren and Pat were no different this Sunday after the emotional draining day before. Pat surprisingly was the first one up. Normally Ren was up first, but he was still curled up on his bed cuddling one of his pillows tightly.
Pat thought Ren looked especially cute and wondered how much cuter he would look curled up with Zach in bed together. They would make a cute couple when everything worked out. He suspected Ren was going to be a hand holder. He smiled to himself thinking of Zach and Ren holding hands as they walked to a picnic lunch down along the shore of Lake Winnipesaukee next to the school.
Grabbing his towel Pat headed down to the shower to clean up before lunch. Without thinking he slammed to the door shut like he normally did waking Ren with a start. The young boy glanced over at his clock and realized he had forgotten to set his alarm the night before.
"Chikusho!" Ren shouted as he looked at the clock. He had wanted to get up early to do the next chapter of his English assignment, TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD. The style of language of the book could be so difficult at times, so he wanted to try to stay at least a couple of chapters ahead of the rest of the class. He had wanted to have the afternoon completely free in order to spend it sketching. Now he wouldn't be able to have the whole afternoon to himself like he had planned.
Ren quickly tossed his sheets aside stripping out of his sleep clothes and grabbing his bathrobe and towel before heading down to shower to clean up for lunch.
"Hey bro," Pat said beaming at the young boy as he took off his robe and hung it on a hook with his towel before entering the large gym style shower.
Ren gave Pat a small smile as he took his place next to him in the shower. "I forgot to set my alarm. I had wanted to get up earlier to do school work," Ren said giving Pat sad look.
Pat laughed, "It's Sunday and I know you've already done your homework. You need to relax a bit especially after yesterday," he said squirting some of his body wash at Ren.
Ren looked at Pat shocked at first then he smiled back at Pat. The very first real smile Pat had seen on Ren. It was the smile of someone truly happy and carefree. Ren aimed his body wash at Pat and squeezed it, but just as he squeezed it Donavon Clancy, a 6ft 4in, 195 lbs. African-American 11th grade basketball player, walked in front of Ren and ended up getting squirted. Ren was suddenly terrified of what he had done. Donavon stared down at Ren with a scowl. Ren quickly started trying to apologize to the older boy, but was so flustered he kept slipping back into Japanese.
"You think this was funny boy?" he asked in a deep menacing voice.
"No," came a very meek reply from Ren, who was terrified of what might happen to him now.
Donavon glared at Ren a bit longer before breaking into a huge grin. "You're right it isn't funny, this is," he laughed suddenly squirting Ren with his bottle. The next thing everyone in the shower was laughing and squirting one another with their shampoos and body washes. This went on for a bit longer before Mr. Zimmer, the floor master, came in the bathroom to see what all the commotion was.
"What the hell are you boys doing in here?" he stated to shout causing everyone to freeze.
He stared at all the boys covered in soap suds squirting one another with an expression of total and complete shock. All the boys thought they were in for serious trouble now, since he had a reputation as no nonsense master. Suddenly he stated laughing hard enough to start crying. Finally he was able to gasp out, "Okay boys when you're done make sure there are no bubbles left in the shower for someone to slip on if they use the shower later," with that he turned and left shaking his head and still chuckling.
Once they realized that they weren't going to get in trouble they all started laughing at the situation. The boys cleaned off and made sure all the soap and bubbles were gone before they cleared out of the shower.
Donavon gave Ren a quick shoulder hug telling the young boy he had had a lot of fun and hoped he hadn't scared him too much at first. He made sure to tell Ren that he was definitely invited to be on the dorm's team for the annual St. Philips water gun battle in the spring. Before Donavon left to get dressed he made sure to let younger teen know he was welcome to stop by anytime to visit his room. He waved and smiled as he left.
Ren and Pat smiled as they looked at one another heading back to their room. Meals were casual at the school on the weekend until Sunday dinner. Pat was able for the first time to persuade Ren to dress much like he had done the day before. He had usually always worn khakis and a Polo or Izod shirt.
Instead Ren was once again dressed in a pair of tight black jeans, low cut black Converse tennis shoes, and another tight black Tee shirt with another Lelouch image. This time the image was a white outline with a saying and this shirt, like the one the day before exposed a fair amount of his toned smooth stomach every now and then when he moved. A black Death-Note hoodie with his grandfather's dog-tags again completed his ensemble. Pat thought he looked damn sexy dressed like that and was almost tempted to ravish the boy himself.
"Are you sure this okay to wear to lunch?" Ren asked looking a bit concerned, since he had never dressed like this before in the dining hall.
"Yes Ren, you look fine. You just need to loosen up a bit here that's all. Remember this is your home at least until next May and we're family now. I wouldn't lead you wrong bro," Pat said with a smile pulling Ren into a shoulder hug before ruffling his hair. "Come on I'm hungry," he said grinning as Ren tried to fix his hair.
Ren was still nervous about going to lunch dressed like he was. He had only dressed like this when he was alone somewhere on the campus or in the town sketching. He was too used to years of wearing the formal high collar military-style black Funagata uniform to be comfortable being dressed like this when doing anything associated with the school. Pat though insisted that he feel free to dress more often like this when not doing school activities. He told Ren it would help him fit in more with the other students, but he wasn't really so sure about that.
Lunch went better than Ren had expected, few students even seemed to notice other than comment they loved his shirt or hoodie. He was beginning to start to trust Pat's slowly growing guiding influence in his life. It was becoming obvious Pat wasn't like the students at his old school. He did seem to really care about him.
After lunch Ren returned to his room to work on his English assignment. He buried himself in TO KILL A MOCKING BIRD for an hour or so, before finally stopping and grabbing his sketchbook to go outside. He wanted to enjoy the last bit of warm weather before the New Hampshire October weather turn completely cold. The early mornings had already begun to turn crisp and now the evenings were beginning to as well.
The clock on Dearborn Hall tolled four o'clock. Ren looked up from his graphite sketch of some of the crew team practicing on the lake distracted by the chiming of the bell. He realized the afternoon air was starting to get chilly, so he pulled his zippered hoodie back on to warm him back up a bit. He often preferred to sketch just in his shirt-sleeves; it gave him a freer movement with his hands and arms.
He gathered up his pencils, charcoal, and other art tools and placed them in his leather messenger bag. He took a long swing from his water bottle before placing it in his bag alongside the rest of the items in his bag. He closed up his sketch pads before standing up and slinging the messenger bag over his shoulder beginning his trek back to the dorm.
Ren wanted to a little more work on the graphite sketch of the crew team before showing it to Miss Jones. The sketch in his charcoal pad of the boathouse on the lake was something his was particularly proud of though. He planned to submit it to the fall festival the following weekend. All in all it had been a successful afternoon. Ren felt very pleased with himself.
As Ren approached his dorm the door swung open as Donovan exited from the building. He grinned at Ren as he held the door open for the younger boy who was entering. Ren returned the older teen's grin with a small shy smile and bow of his head.
"Thank you," Ren said softly looking up at the towering Afro-American teen.
"Dou itashi mashite Ren sama," Donovan replied smiling at Ren.
Ren looked up shocked at Donovan. He had never expected the older teen to speak fluent Japanese, much less to say `you're welcome Ren' and addressing him formally as an inferior to a superior back to him.
Donovan's smile grew wider as he realized the reason for Ren's shocked expression.
"I'm half Japanese. My father met my mother when he was Chargé d'affaires at the American Embassy in Tokyo. It's pleasure to meet a member of the Imperial family no matter how distant a relation," he said smiling at the astonished teen. "Don't worry I won't tell anyone who you are. There are others here like you who would rather make their own mark, than rely on their family name and position," Donovan said smiling gently at the younger boy.
Ren was humbled by Donovan's words. He hadn't been treated like this in a very long time by another student. It was something he had never suspected to encounter in America. Bowing formally to Donovan he said, "Thank you very much. Please call me Ren or Ren kun."
Grinning wide Donovan returned Ren's bow perfectly. "I admire people like you who only want to be themselves, not the creatures society tries to force them to be. If there is anything I can ever do for you please don't hesitate to ask," he said reaching out and ruffling Ren's hair before continuing out heading towards the library.
Just then a group of boys carrying lacrosse sticks chattering and laughing started to charge up the stairs and into to his dorm Ren almost could have sworn he heard Donovan say loudly to himself, "Fuck, he's hotter in person than I could have ever thought. Definitely gotta ride that tight lil' momo jiri before the year's out it just looks too delicious to go to waste," but he must have been confused by all the noise from the group. Someone in the group must have said something and he had misheard what had been said mistaking it as coming from Donovan.
Ren entered the dorm and opened the stairwell door and began walking up to the third floor where his room was located. He was still astounded at what had just happened to him. He never expected anyone here in America to figure out who he was or much less treat him with the respect Donovan had just shown him. He was surprised at how good it made him feel to be treated like that by someone. He was starting to realize maybe he could make a place for himself here and actually be content rather than just surviving.
Ren noticed when he entered the room Pat hadn't yet returned to change for dinner. He hung his messenger bag up after pulling out his water bottle and setting it on his desk. Ren opened up both sketch pads taking a look at his afternoon's work. He was very pleased with the charcoal sketch of the school's boathouse, but felt the graphite sketch need some more shading.
He kicked off his shoes and set them neatly along the side of his desk. Before hopping up on his bed to work a little more, Ren grabbed his pencils from his messenger bag. He was soon lost in working on the artwork. He was so absorbed in what he was doing when there was a knock on the door he didn't even look up. All he did was say, "Yes, come in."
After sketching for another minute or so Ren looked up half expecting to see Donovan again, but instead there was Zach standing at the end of his bed holding an extremely large shopping bag. He was startled by the boy's surprise visit. He had hoped the next time he saw Zach it would be in the company of Pat, but instead he was now alone with him. His heart began to pound as he looked at the handsome boy in front of him.
"Hey Ren," Zach said softly as he nervously looked at Ren sitting on his bed sketching.
"Zach," Ren replied feeling as nervous as Zach looked. He hadn't expected to see Zach standing there. Yes, he had told Pat he would forgive Zach, but he had hoped Pat would be there to give him moral support and protect him from his feelings.
Zach approached Ren's bed slowly leaving the large bag leaning against the end of the bed. Carefully Zach sat down on the bed next to Ren. He was starting to have doubts about what he was about to do, but knew he had to do it now before he lost his courage.
The poor Japanese teen's heart was beating a mile a minute. He was trapped and alone with this handsome boy he had beaten off to for the last few days. He hardened immediately as he thought of Zach's thick uncut seven inch wedge shaped cock. He had gotten his first look at it afternoon before in the theatre bathroom after the retrospective of Miyazaki films. Not want wanting to, but unable to prevent himself he licked his lips at the memory.
He was in so much trouble now. He could picture himself doing things he had only thought of doing with Zach. He knew if he did any of them this new life he was just beginning to enjoy would be over as soon as people knew he was a fag. There was no way to order Zach out of the room without embarrassing both of them.
Zach looked at Ren and could easily see he was panicked. He had been thinking since the night before what he wanted to say to Ren now. He hoped it would be enough to bridge the damage from the day before. His heart went out to the slender beautiful Japanese boy who had suffered so much at his last school.
Each time before when he had dated a boy it had been almost solely about sex, but with Ren he wanted so much more. True, he wanted to suck Ren's cute four inch dick and feel the boy sucking on his, as well wanting to slide deep inside Ren's tight muscular ass to give them both as much pleasure as they could, but he wanted more this time. Zach wanted to give his heart to him, and get Ren's heart in return. He wanted the whole package this time, not the just the pretty wrapping.
Ren was sitting Indian style on his bed with his sketch pad serving as a barrier to Zach. He hoped it would protect him from what he feared might happen if it was gone. He dropped his eyes hoping this would also protect him from what his body wanted from Zach.
"Ren, I'm really sorry for recording you yesterday in the theatre restroom. I really, really didn't mean to scare you like that with my stupid actions. Please can you ever forgive me?" Zach asked pleading with the beautiful Japanese boy.
Ren wanted to say yes, but was afraid nothing would come out of his mouth if he tried to say anything.
"Ren?"
Finally after sitting there a couple minutes Ren nodded his head and whispered, "Yes, I forgive you Zach."
Zach reached out starting to pick up the sketch pad lying between the two of them on the bed. At first he thought Ren was going to grab it as to use as a shield against him. Yet in the end the small pale hands just slid off it into his lap as Zach moved it to Ren's desk.
Ren sobbed realizing his new life was about to end, and his old life of hell was about to begin again. He knew he couldn't resist anything Zach wanted of him. He just wasn't strong enough and knew deep down he wanted Zach no matter what pain it would cause him. He tried to prepare himself for the brief moment of pleasure he would enjoy, before the hours, days, and months of guilt and shame he knew that would soon follow. Forever condemning him to the dark hellish world he had lived in for so long already.
He felt Zach get off the bed and walk to the end of the bed. Ren didn't dare look up for fear of what he might see. The bed shifted as Zach sat back down and Ren heard him pull something out of the bag. Puzzled as to what Zach was going to demand of him to do with whatever was in the bag he slowly looked up. He was shocked at what he now saw sitting in front of him.
Zach was holding large three foot rust colored teddy bear with a large red bow tied around its neck. In its paws was a limited addition Code Geass Lelouch fashion doll. He gave Ren a shy smile as he pushed the large teddy bear into Ren's lap.
"It's not much Ren, but it's the least I can do to try and make it up to you for yesterday," Zach said gently to Ren. "Will you forgive me for being so stupid?" He asked giving Ren a hopeful look.
Ren was stunned, never before in his life had someone done something like this for him. Zach was something he had not encountered before, a sweet, kind, thoughtful, and caring boy.
"Yes Zach, I forgive you," Ren said faintly, he felt himself begin to blush and looked down in order hide his face in his long hair.
Zach smiled as Ren began to blush and looked down not daring to look back at him. This only made him want Ren even more than he already did. He scooted closer to Ren until his knees were just barely touching Ren's knees. As soon as he made contact with Ren's body Zach's cock began to harden almost as if it were thinking of what pleasures this young teen held for it.
Ren's body trembled at the contact of Zach's knees touching it. His cock throbbed in response, and then Ren moaned slightly. He blushed, a deeper shade of red at his inability to prevent his body from signally its pleasure at being touched by the 5'9", 135 lbs. handsome teen.
Zach reached out and gently brushed Ren's long hair out of his face before cupping his fingers under Ren's chin and tilted his face up to meet his. He couldn't help himself as he leaned forward and brushed his lips against Ren's soft thin lips. Zach couldn't help it and opened his lips and let his tongue gently, but firmly push its way into the younger Japanese boy's mouth.
Ren's mind was screaming no don't let him kiss you, but his body was saying yes. Without even thinking as soon as he felt Zach's tongue forcing its way into his mouth he began to surrender to the older boy's domination. He opened his mouth wider and soon the two of them were engaged in a passionate, but brief kissing session.
Zach pulled back from Ren and gazed deep into the panting boy's jade green eyes. There was a long pause as if he was debating something with himself before he leaned back and kissed Ren one last time gently on the forehead.
"I'll see you later at dinner," said Zach giving Ren a gentle smile as he got off the bed. "Later," he said reaching and poking Ren on the nose playfully before heading towards the door. As he opened it and prepared to leave he turned and looked back at the shocked Ren and smiled before closing the door behind him.
Ren sat on his bed dazed by what had just happened to him. He had been on the verge of surrendering himself and allowing Zach to do whatever he wanted to him, but instead Zach stopped and didn't push Ren into anything sexual. Instead other than the passionate kiss Zach had been completely respectful of him. He was secretly pleased, but yet puzzled at the turn of events.
There was no doubt in his mind Zach had wanted more, but stopped. Strangely Ren was the one who wanted more this time, but had been denied what his body craved for from Zach. As he got himself under control he realized it was time to get ready for dinner.
As he got up and started to change into his school uniform for dinner Ren realized there was a huge wet spot on the front of his yellow bikini underwear. His still hard cock was oozing pre-cum like crazy. He pulled the front of his underwear away from him and looked at himself. What was happening to him? Just then the door opened suddenly startling Ren.
Ren jumped causing him to let go of his underwear abruptly. He looked guiltily at Pat like a small child being caught trying to steal cookies from the cookie jar. He turned red at being caught wearing nothing but his underwear and looking at his hard cock. He just wanted to crawl under a rock.
Pat just chuckled at Ren's embarrassment. "Look Ren, we've been roommates since August, it's okay to get hard and need to rub out. It's only natural and guys have been doing it since we crawled out of the slime," he said stripping out of his clothes and starting to put on his uniform.
"It's really no big deal, look at me I've been beating off since a friend and his older brother showed me how to do it when I was nine," Pat continued bending down and looking under his bed for one of his loafers. Ren quickly took this opportunity to finish getting dressed while Pat searched for his shoe under the bed.
"We're going to be roomies until May, so don't worry about it," he said sitting down on the edge of his bed for a second after finding the shoe. Pushing his foot into the loafer Pat said, "I'm sure in time you'll get used to it and become comfortable enough to rub one out like me and not worry about another guy being around you when the need arises. After all we've all have one."
"Come on we don't want to be late," Pat said as he adjusted his school tie heading towards the door. Suddenly he stopped noticing the huge rust colored teddy bear lying on Ren's bed for the first time. "Whoa! That's a big bear bro! Where did you get it?" He asked looking at Ren.
"Zach brought it over when he came to apologize earlier," said a blushing Ren. He could feel the heat in his face as he told Pat, but it wasn't the fact Zach had brought the bear and Lelouch doll, it was the kiss. He couldn't get it out of his mind, nor would his body allow him to forget how good it actually was.
"Sweet, then you guys are cool with one another now?" He asked the blushing Ren.
"Yes," was all Ren could manage at the moment to say. He feared if he said anything else he would let it slip what had happened to him. Ren wasn't ready yet to confront his building desire for this boy, who was somehow managing to seduce him.
Pat threw his arm around Ren's neck and pulled the younger boy towards him in a brotherly hug. "I hoped you guys would work things out. You guys are going to end up the best of friends before the year is out," he said grinning as he opened the door to the room and pulled Ren through it, still locked in the bro-hug with the younger boy.
Half way across The Commons Zach jogged up and joined them. "Hey guys," he said cheerfully brushing up against Ren and nodding to Pat.
This contact with Zach caused the formerly softening Ren to bone back up. He felt Zach fingers brush against his, almost as if he was trying to hold his hand. Ren quickly glanced at Zach blushing as he did so, remembering the kiss and briefly wishing there had been more than just kissing. He felt so exposed and vulnerable as they walked to the dining hall. Before long their small group was surrounded by more and more boys on the way to dinner.
"Konbanw Ren kun," Donovan said coming up to Ren with a big smile.
"Hey Donovan, how's it going?" Pat said acknowledging his floor mate's presence as he joined their small group.
"Good bro, the water polo team is looking particularly good this year," grinned Donovan giving a quick glance at Ren. "Ogenki desuka?" He asked Ren.
"Yaa Yuuta kun," Ren said, returning his greeting and calling the older teen by a Japanese boy's name that had a similar meaning to his actual name, he smiled broadly at Donovan. "Watashi wa genki desu. Arigato! Anatawa?"
"Genki desu," replied Donovan ruffling Ren's hair causing him to grin back at him.
Zach stared first at Donovan and then Ren and back then at Donovan. This was a turn of events he had not considered before, Ren encountering someone at the school who could speak Japanese. And who could possibly even take Ren away from him if he wasn't careful. It was extremely important that he do this right or he could actually lose any chance of being with Ren. He tried to stay and look calm as he asked Ren what he and Donovan said.
"Oh I'm sorry Zach, this is Donovan I met him this morning in the shower. We bumped into one another again later after lunch and I discovered he was born in Japan and speaks Japanese," Ren said excitedly.
"Yes, Ren discovered he was a big squirter in the shower this morning when he accidentally spurted all over Donovan here," Pat said proudly with a huge smile.
Donovan gave Zach a huge grin as the tenth grader's eyes widened in total complete shock as he stared at the older boy. He knew exactly what Zach was thinking and loved the fact it had shocked the white boy that he had gotten to Ren before him.
"That had to be one of the best shower fights I've been in a while. Definitely better the last year's shaving cream fight in the gym shower room," Pat went on saying as he mussed up Ren's long hair some more.
Initially Zach was stunned at the thought Ren had done something sexually with Donovan, but then he realized as Pat explained it was a shower fight it was wrong to even think something like that of Ren. He doubted Ren would ever do anything sexual in such a public place as a shower. Ren was just too shy and innocent to be like that. Zach glanced over at Donovan again as Ren began speak to him. The older teen gave him another grin that seemed to have more meaning than it should. This made Zach even more uncomfortable.
"Please forgive me Zach for being so rude and not introducing the two of you and explaining what we were saying," he said giving both boys a small bow. "Donovan may I present Zach, a classmate and friend," he said formally introducing the two boys. "Zach this is Donovan who lives in our dorm on my hall," he said smiling.
Donovan and Zach smiled and shook one another's hands as they seemed to carefully appraise each other. Ren was pleased each of his new friends had met and hoped they too would become friends.
"Donovan greeted me and asked how I was doing. I greeted him in return and told him I was doing well. I then asked him how he was doing. He answered back he was fine." Ren said smiling at the two boys as their small group continued towards the dining hall. "Forgive me Zach I will try and be more careful to include you in the discussion when Donovan and I are speaking Japanese," he said briefly brushing his hand back against Zach's.
Zach started to grasp Ren's hand in his own, but at the last second thought better of it and let go. He didn't want Ren to feel uncomfortable with him holding his hand in public, but he certainly wished he could. Zach glanced briefly over at Donovan to see if he had noticed him trying to hold Ren's hand, and was thrown off guard when Donovan gave him a knowing smile acknowledging the fact Zach was interested in Ren. He didn't know want to make of the smile, was it just letting him know he understood Zach's feelings and desires towards Ren or was it a challenge to him letting Zach know he had a rival for Ren.
Ren felt content as they walked towards Tupper Hall, the dining hall. Life here at St. Philips just seemed to be getting better and better. For the very first time he felt he really had made friends. One who spoke Japanese and at one time lived there, so he wouldn't be lonely, and the other, who made him want things he knew he shouldn't, but at the same time made it seem right to want them. Yet being with Zach, made him feel right even though it was making him question things about himself. And finally he had gotten a pseudo-big brother, in Pat. He felt as if the gods were smiling down on him for the first time.
They entered the dining hall with all the other boys. Zach smiled at Ren before heading off to his table. As usual Zach's smile made him harden up yet again. Donovan headed over to his table which was next to Ren and Pat's. He also gave Ren a smile that made him feel all warm inside before sitting down to dinner.
For the first time since he had entered St. Philips Ren actually began to participate in the conversation at their table. He was surprised at the reaction of the others. They seemed genuinely happy at his involvement with the conversations. Though he wasn't as talkative as the others it was a distinct improvement over past meals. By past standards he had been a downright chatter box. Pat seemed pleased at his change, often during the dinner smiled and nodded at him in encouragement.
As soon as dinner was over Zach was back by his side, almost as if he magically appeared next to him. Zach stayed as close to him as he possibly could as they exited the building. Occasionally he would glance back to see where Donovan was, only to be greeted by that same smile that seemed to hold a deeper meaning.
Bravely Zach asked Ren if they could take a walk before evening study hall. He was pleased when Ren shyly agreed. They began walking slowly down towards the lake. They were soon as close together as they had been before dinner.
"Ren, would you teach me some Japanese?" Zach asked Ren bashfully, fearing the boy would refuse him.
Ren tried to give Zach as modest smile as possible, but Zach could clearly see Ren was pleased with the request. All the doubts he had earlier were now gone. Zach knew if he continued to move slowly he would have Ren for his boyfriend. Maybe if all continued well he might even get Ren agree to attend the annual Halloween costume dance with him in a couple of weeks.
"We should start simple," Ren said. "Watashi no namae wa Ren kun desu. This means, my name is Ren. The word after my name, kun, tells you I am letting you be familiar with me as a close friend," Ren blushed as he told Zach this. "You try it," he said looking at Zach through his long bangs. "Say your name after the word namae."
"Watashi no namae wa Zach kun desu," Zach tried repeating what Ren had said. It wasn't perfect by any means, but it was a start.
Ren beamed a huge smile at Zach at his first attempt to speak his language. He was secretly pleased Zach had wanted to try and learn Japanese. Maybe there was more to him than he first thought. They spent the next thirty minutes or more practicing words and short simple phrases in Japanese. Between each word and phrase they sat on a fallen tree trunk listening to the crickets chipping and the rustling of the leaves on the in the trees and on the ground where they had already fallen in preparation for the coming winter.
As Ren taught Zach a few more simple phrases he felt the older boy timidly take his hand in his. As their fingers laced together Ren squeezed Zach's hand tightly for an instant, letting Zach know he was okay with the contact. Zach responded by squeezing Ren's hand in return. They sat there after a while just silently holding hands listening to the peaceful autumn night until the clock in Dearborn Hall, the administration building, chimed eight o'clock letting all know it was time for study hall.
The two boys were surprised at the time. They had spent over an hour sitting there in the crisp New Hampshire night holding hands and listening contentedly to the sounds of the night. They smiled demurely at one another as they stood up and began walking silently back towards the well-lit quad. Right at the edge of the quad just barely beyond the field of lights they stopped. The boys turned towards one another. Zach reached down and tilted Ren's chin up towards his face before leaning down and gave Ren a brief, but wet kiss on the lips.
"Good night Ren. Thank you for the lessons and a wonderful time," Zach said smiling down at Ren. He let go of Ren's hand and headed towards his dorm alone.
Ren watched Zach walk away and enter his dorm, before he proceeded towards his own. He smiled softly to himself realizing he was happy for the first time is a very long time. He gave himself a hug as he approached the steps to his dorm and began to climb them. Maybe Pat was right he was home.
When Ren entered his room Pat had already stripped down to his boxers and was busy reading his Shakespeare for the next day classes. He smiled at Ren but didn't say anything other than to mention Ren was cutting it close to curfew time. Ren responded by nodding and smiling sheepishly back at the older boy.
Study hall period in his room seemed to fly by quicker than usual. He was glad Pat hadn't questioned him when he came in about where he had disappeared to after dinner with Zach. He suspected he already knew, but wasn't going to embarrass him with asking.
His time with Zach after dinner had been a special private moment he wasn't ready to share with anyone else yet. It may have been brief, but it meant so much more to him than he could have ever imagined. Time had stood still for them as they sat there under the clear autumn night listening to the crickets and the wind rustling leaves as they held hands. Ren began to believe maybe Zach really did actually care for him. If this was so maybe he should take the risk.
That night when Ren climbed under the sheets of his bed he pulled the huge teddy bear against him. As he cuddled up with it he noticed Zach must have sprayed it with his cologne. Ren smiled to himself as he snuggled closer to it inhaling the scent. There was something about having Zach's scent on the huge bear that seemed to make it more magical.
As he drifted off to sleep that night he imagined he was sleeping with his arms around Zach. It was one of the best sleeps he had had in a very long time, filled with dreams of he and Zach mingled together in passionate love making and later walking together holding hands on his favorite beach in Japan. Ren smiled to himself in his sleep. He had at last found somewhere he actually belonged for the first time in his life.
End of Chapter Three
Greetings to all my faithful readers. Thank you for your patience in waiting for this latest chapter of Paper Cuts. I hope to be able to publish future chapters a bit more regularly than before. I hope you enjoy this chapter of the story. Be sure to check out my other stories posted here on nifty. Feel free to hit me up with your thoughts and comments at x_emoboi_x@yahoo.com
Here are my other stories. Hope you enjoy them.
http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/adult-youth/summer-discoveries/
http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/adult-youth/adventures-at-school/
http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/incest/pool-party/
http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/adult-youth/jaydens-dark-journey
http://www.nifty.org/nifty/gay/sf-fantasy/a-boys-gothic-tale/