Our Doctor

Please, please, please donate to Nifty to keep the site free. You guys love this stories (otherwise, why would you be reading this) so help Nifty in anyway you can !

Weeks, months and years went by. Jeremy and I were happy together. Doc didn't make it with Edward. They were good friends now, and sometimes even with benefits, but they were not an item. Peter was often over at our place, just as a lot of our other friends.

With time Jeremy and I had built our relationship on trust and respect for each other. We had a very good communication and were able to talk about any and everything. It was good to have my best friend as a lover and husband. That's what I had always craved.

Professionally, we were both at the very peak of our careers. Jeremy had just been promoted and was now a full associate in the firm he was working for. For me, I had been awarded as the best sales man 4 years in a row. As I worked on commission, my income was really nice and we could afford quite a few things we had not even dreamed of when we got together. We wanted, at last, buy a house together and we didn't even have to get a mortgage! The only thing that was preventing me to buy the house yet was that I needed a new car, desperately. Jeremy had a company car, and nothing less than a Mercedes, thanks to his promotion. I teased him quite a lot saying it was an old man's car, but when I saw it, I had to admit he had made a fabulous choice as it was a coupŽ model with all the possible extra's available. He had chosen a discreet metallic blue color with matching leather interior. My beaten up Honda of more than twelve years old looked really miserable next to his in our driveway. I put it up for sale for a ridiculous price so that any young guy or student could afford it. The engine was in perfect condition as I took care of the car and entered it to service on time.

One evening, as we were watching television, the doorbell rang and I went to open the door. A young girl was standing nervously at the door, apologizing profusely for disturbing that late at night (it was only 8:30 pm) but she had seen the sign on the car and was curious if she could afford it and, if she could, she would like to have a little test drive. I told her the price and she almost started a happy dance as it was even less of her budget. I took the keys and told her to go for a test drive. She came back about half an hour later and had a big smile on her face.

• I want it, I want it! she yelled and couldn't stay still because she was so excited.

We went into the house and signed the necessary papers and she hold out the amount of money I wanted in cash. She had come prepared! In less than an hour she left the house in what she thought was the best car ever. She wasn't completely wrong. But that left me without a car. As it was a Friday night, Jeremy suggested we would go car shopping in the morning, as we had no other plans. I agreed and went on the Internet to see what was available and what I could afford. In fact, with the results of the last months at my job, I could afford almost anything I wanted. While surfing the net, Jeremy came to sit next to me and made a few suggestions and brought in his input as he had been through the whole process himself just a few months earlier. As I was concentrated on my search, I didn't even realize that at one point, Jeremy was not at my side anymore and had probably gone to bed, as I didn't see him in the living room or the kitchen. I felt guilty about leaving him out. I went to the bedroom and, indeed, I heard him snore lightly. I went back to the living room and switched out the lights and shut down the computer. My mind was almost made up about the car I wanted. As I slipped in between the sheets, Jeremy automatically turned over and spooned me, putting his arm over my chest. That was the way we went to sleep for several years now.

When I woke up the following morning, I immediately noticed there was something wrong. Jeremy was still spooned against my back, but he felt awfully cold. I was awake in no time and turned to him. He didn't move. I took his face in my hands to kiss him, but his skin had not his usual warmth. I shook him lightly to wake him up, but he didn't react. I suddenly got in a complete panic state. I grabbed my phone and dialed Doc's number. He answered almost on the first ring and greeted me in his usual way:

• Hello Gorgeous!

I started to babble and realized I had to concentrate if I wanted to get any sensible sentence out of my mouth, but I couldn't. Doc immediately realized there was something terribly wrong and said he was on his way.

Less than ten minutes later I heard the doorbell and Doc came in. He looked at me and didn't have to ask anything. He instinctively ran up the stairs and went directly to our bedroom. I didn't have the courage to get up the stairs again as I suspected the final outcome. I heard Doc speaking on his mobile phone and then he came down the stairs. He had a very serious look on his face, something I almost saw with him, except in his practice. He came over to me and took him in my arms. I didn't ask anything because I was afraid to receive the confirmation of my suspicion.

• What happened? he asked, whispering in my ears.

I tried to talk but before I could actually tell him nothing had happened, I fainted in his arms.

When I woke up, I was in a hospital bed. Doc was sitting next to me and as soon as he sensed that I moved, he stood up and looked in my face.

-Hello Gorgeous, you are finally with us again!

I had no idea at all about what had happened and was surprised to see doc and not Jeremy. I looked at Doc and asked him about my lover.

• Tell me, what is the last thing you remember? Doc asked.

I did a big effort to scan my memory, but couldn't recall a thing. I just asked Doc how long I had been here in hospital and was stunned when he said it was almost three weeks. My eyes must have grown as big as saucers as he told me that, and then I asked him what happened.

• Do you remember me coming to your house? He asked.

• No, I answered.

• Do you remember calling me? He then asked.

• No, I answered truthfully.

He then went through a number of questions to check on my neurological state. Questions such as what year we were in, what my address was and what car I was driving...

At that question I remembered the girl coming to the house and buying my beat up Honda. I smiled at him and told him I had succeeded in selling it and that I was surfing the net for a new one. And then ...

Everything came back to me in bulk. I was almost afraid to ask the question, but I had to.

• Jeremy?

Doc took my hands in his and looked me in the eyes with a very sad look.

• He's gone Frank.

I knew he was going to say that, but nonetheless it came as a shock. Doc was talking to me, but the words didn't come through completely. I heard something that was like "brain stroke" and a little later something like "better for him" and I saw a single tear going down his cheek. He squeezed my hand and tried to catch my attention, but I felt nauseous. I wanted to throw up, but I couldn't. I suddenly felt like I had to get up and leave this hospital, but as soon as my feet touched the ground, I went through my knees. My legs couldn't support my weight. Doc helped me back in bed and told me that three weeks of unconsciousness and not moving, had affected my muscle activity. I had to have a lot of help to get back to my feet.

I started sobbing and crying and soon felt a syringe in my upper arm. Before long I saw only darkness.

The next time I opened my eyes, Doc was not there, but Peter was. He was actually holding my hand and watched me very closely. He had a smile on his face, but it was a sad one. He greeted me and I was surprised to hear my own voice answering him. The previous conversation with Doc came back to my mind and once again a silent tear found its way from my eyes to the corner of my lips.

I tried to collect my thoughts. It was not easy at all, but I had to do it.

• I know Doc told me a lot of things, but I can't remember it clearly, I said. Can you bring me up-to-date?

Peter nodded and started to tell me everything that had happened on the terrible Saturday morning. Peter tried to be as gentle as possible, taking a lot of care in his choice of words and his tone of voice. With a lot of tender care he told me Jeremy had suffered a massive brain stroke for which there was no real explanation. Jeremy was a healthy man and took great care of his nutrition, doing a lot of sports. It seemed that a brain stroke was something that could not been predicted. When Doc took me in his arms I fainted and went straight into a coma. For that either there was an explanation. I was in that state for three weeks. Meanwhile they had had Jeremy's funeral. It had been a very simple and intimate ceremony where most of our friends were present. Jeremy was not a religious man and the ceremony was a little bit out of the regular services. Next to his coffin there was a picture of him and a microphone. Whoever wanted to say a few words, had the opportunity to get up, come up front and say what was on their heart. There were a lot of very emotional testimonies, but also very light ones, remembering the joyful guy Jeremy had been. Peter mentioned that there was a videotape of the ceremony and that whenever I was ready, I could watch it.

The following week, Jeremy's company had come to collect his car. As the lease on the house was on Jeremy's name, the owner had come to say that the house had to be empty the following week. Doc had taken the responsibility to take over the lease so that I could go back there if I wanted. Nobody could tell at that time how long I would be totally out.

Peter and I were crying a lot while he told me all that had happened during those three weeks. We didn't lose our grip on each other's hands. Peter went on and on as he had been, together with Doc, the person to settle whatever there was to settle. I was very grateful for everything they had done. Just as peter finished related everything, Doc arrived. He looked at me and in a professional way looked at my chart and then checked my vitals. He seemed satisfied with the results and told me that the following day I would start to work with a physiotherapist to get my muscles back in working order. He also told me to take my time. He had called my boss and told him what had happened. Apparently my boss had been very understanding and told Doc to tell me I could take my time to get over the whole situation.

I didn't know how to react and the pain I felt was terrific. I wanted to explain it to Peter and Doc, but was totally incapable. The pain was not in a particular part of my body, and at the same time it was everywhere. I couldn't believe that my beloved friend, my lover, my husband was gone. I could not imagine that I would never see him again, that I would never be able to touch him or feel him. I wanted to trade places with him so he could live. I wanted to join him wherever he was. I knew it was impossible and it was probably that that hurt the most.

Peter and Doc were absolutely the best friends I could ever dream of. They came by every single day and kept me company and even tried to cheer me up, but failed miserably. Nonetheless, they encouraged me to work with the physiotherapist so that I could be on my feet again and get out of the claustrophobic room I was in. I was not really animated to do a lot of efforts, but I saw the importance of getting back on my feet. It was Peter who one day got angry with me and almost shouted at me:

Do you think Jeremy would be proud if he saw you like that? Do you think that is what he saw in you? It is time for you to react and to live up to his expectations although he is not here anymore. He would want you to go on living and show the world who you are. I can understand you are grieving, but it is not laying in a bed that things will get better!

He had been quite harsh with his words, but I knew it was for my own good. Bringing Jeremy's memory into the conversation made me react almost immediately and the physiotherapist was surprised with my will to get on my feet the next morning. It took me less than a week to be able to walk on my own and before I even realized it, the doctors released me from hospital. Doc and Peter were both concerned with me wanting to go back to our house. Peter took some leave from his work and stayed with me. The day I could leave the hospital he came to get me and asked me several times if I was sure I wanted to go back to Jeremy's and my place. I assured him that I didn't want to be anywhere else. I saw he was reluctant to give in, but he did.

When we reached the house, it felt strange to see no cars on the driveway. When we got into the house I was surprised to see everything was clean and tidy. Everything was the same as when I involuntarily left. On the table in front of the sofa in the living room there was a picture of Jeremy and me that had been taken during our last holidays. All the other pictures had disappeared. I could also see that most of Jeremy's things had been removed. I ran upstairs to our bedroom and looked in the closet to see most of Jeremy's clothes had been removed as well. Peter followed me very close but didn't say a word. I guessed this was his work. He did it with the best of intentions, but I so wanted to touch Jeremy's clothes and smell his fragrance. Despite of that I was grateful they had done what they did. They didn't want me to forget Jeremy, and that was why they had left the picture on the table in the living room.

I knew life had to go on. Jeremy was gone, yes, but I was still here. I knew the coming weeks and months would be hard, but I wanted to live up to what I thought Jeremy would have liked. I had never given much importance to what other's thought about me, but Jeremy's opinion was my number one priority. I knew I would love him till my last breath, but I could not honor him letting the pain and the grief take over my life.

Peter was absolutely wonderful during the time after my getting home. Most of the time he stayed over and was using the guest-room while I refused to sleep anywhere else than in our bedroom. He and Doc were doing everything they could to get me back to a normal life. About three months after Jeremy's death, I even started to work again. In the beginning it was very hard and difficult to concentrate on business, but my boss was very patient with me and slowly, but surely, I could get back to my old self and show clear results of positive thinking.

On one Saturday morning I asked Peter to go with me to do what Jeremy and I had planned to do. We went car shopping. I thought of buying exactly the same car Jeremy had, but I knew it was not a good idea. I would constantly be reminded of the pain his leaving had given me. I went for my first choice that I made the night before Jeremy went away. It was not even one o'clock in the afternoon when I left the BMW dealership in a brand new 428i convertible. For the first time in months, Peter could see a genuine smile on my face. I thought that if destiny had taken Jeremy out of my life, I would have to bring some little joys back. Buying the BMW was one of them. We drove back to the house and as Peter got out of his car, I told him to get into mine. I pushed the button to take the top off and we were soon on the road. I had no particular destination. I just wanted to drive and enjoy the freedom a convertible gives you. I had taken a few CD's before leaving the house and it was absolutely great to hear nice music while driving along the coast. Peter seemed to enjoy it as well and some of the songs that were playing, we sang along full lungs. If people saw us driving by they would probably have thought we were just nuts! After a few drives in all directions I told Peter we had to go and fetch Doc. I turned the car around and drove towards his practice, as I knew at this hour he was about to finish. WE just reached his place as he came out.

• Wow!!! That's a nice toy you got yourself Frank!

• Just jump in and we'll go for a drive, I answered,

Doc didn't need a formal invitation to this. He just jumped in and we were on the road again. The weather was perfect for such a drive and once again we just went to where Destiny as leading us. We ended up in a secluded spot where Jeremy and I had been several times. Most of those times we had left the car and gone down a little path that brought us to an almost hidden spot and yes, we had had sex there, more than once. I stopped the car and told Peter and Doc where we were. They both suddenly had a concerned look on their face, but I assured them I was all right. I told them about the little path that was hidden from view and where it led.

• Come on guys, let's go down. You'll see the views are absolutely incredible!

E walked down the path, pushing some branches and bushes aside, which indicated the path was not used frequently. I knew it was about a fifteen minutes walk as I had gone down that path quite a few times with Jeremy. Suddenly I heard a voice saying "You are doing the right thing, Frank" and I turned around to look at Doc and Peter and asked who had said that. They both looked stunned at me, saying they had not uttered a word. I swore I had clearly heard the words, but they both denied firmly that they had said anything. They looked at me as if they were thinking I was going mad. We resumed our walking and reached the spot I wanted to show them. There, in front of us was a magnificent view of the bay and the ocean. We were surrounded by luxurious nature with plants and bushes and flowers. The sun was warm and a fresh breeze was blowing softly. Again I heard a voice saying "Yes baby, this is the perfect spot!" and once again I looked at my two friends who were totally oblivious to me and watching the scenery in front of them. This time I didn't say anything but prayed silently that the voice I heard would be that of Jeremy.

I wanted that connection with him. I had talked to him in silence so often and seen him in my dreams. I just felt so lonely although my best friends were with me. I was standing in between Peter and Doc and my arms wrapped themselves around their waists. Automatically they both put an arm on my shoulder and we continued enjoying the scenery. For the third time I heard the voice saying "I am watching over you guys. Enjoy life to the fullest". This time as well as Doc as Peter jerked their heads towards me and I realized they had heard the voice, too. There was a dumbstruck expression on both their faces but I only smiled. I was now sure it was Jeremy who had been talking to us. Doc was the first to ask if we had heard it and we both said yes.

I guess it is Jeremy who is telling us we are in the best company possible, I said.

The other two had a bit of a problem believing my words but after a little time they saw it made sense. In a split second we all three had a big smile on our faces and unconsciously we looked upwards to the sky as if Jeremy would appear. Of course he didn't but it was worth a try. We then stared in each other's eyes and I felt an inner peace that I had not felt since I woke up out of my coma. I felt my muscles relax and a general feeling of well-being run through my veins. I squeezed my both friends closer to me and we ended up in a group hug. I could actually feel positive vibrations emanating from both of them and as I looked up at them it was first Peter's lips that brushed mine, ever so softly and tender. I then turned towards Doc and brushed his lips as well. And last, but not least, Doc and Peter kissed tenderly in front of my eyes. I joined them and we soon were locked in a three-way kiss. What started as something tender and soft soon turned to a passionate and eager kiss. Our hands had minds of their own and travelled over our bodies. I needed more and feel more close to my friends so I took off my T-shirt over my head and immediately felt hands on my bare skin. Doc and Peter soon followed my example and stripped. We were still locked in that three-way embrace but enjoying the direct closeness of skin-to-skin contact.

For the fourth time in the last hour I heard the voice say "Yessssssssssss" and we all looked up at the sky again for a split second. After that we looked at each other and smiled. It was as if Jeremy had just given us the pin-code to our inner lusts. We resumed our kissing and caressing. As far as we could reach, our hands touched every square inch of skin. The kissing was passionate and the grabbing and groping got a bit rougher. The sexual energy was kicking in and the horniness was building up. I soon unfastened Peter's belt and opened the top button of his jeans. Feeling what I was doing he quickly started to o the same to Doc, who, in turn, loosened my pants as well. All three trousers fell at our ankles at the same time and we kicked off our shoes and stepped out of them. We were standing there, all three naked except for our underwear. All three briefs were tenting obscenely and showing wet spots were the head of cock was pushing against the fabric. Our movements were synchronized and almost a choreography as we were pleasing our partners. Doc knew that my ears were really sensitive form previous sexual plays and put his tongue in my ear. That made me throw my head back and Peter took the opportunity to lick that tender part between my collarbone and my other ear. I felt so alive and ... yes, excited. My cock was throbbing in my underwear and I longed for someone to touch it. I was rewarded with two hands on my crotch. I was moaning out loud. My briefs joined the pile of clothes on the nearby three branch. My cock was harder than ever before and pointing towards the sky as if it was looking for Jeremy, but found it wrapped by two strong hands. I slipped my hands under the waistband of Doc and Peter's briefs and cupped their buttocks. With the sweat of the building sexual heat, my fingers soon could play with their cracks and rosebuds.

Although we were filled with lust and desire, there was also a tender and caring feeling between the three of us. For once, in a threesome, I could actually feel love! I didn't know who was showing more love in this situation, but one of Peter's kisses gave me the answer. In the past, when Jeremy was still alive, we had discussed it and Jeremy pretended Peter had a crush on me. I denied that at the time, but was about to be obliged to admit that Jeremy was probably right. Peter put his whole heart and soul in that kiss and I responded to him in the same way. As we were kissing so passionately, Doc was a little bit idle, but not for long. He dropped to his knees and pulled our both cocks together and wrapped his mouth around them. He sucked us with his never-ending skills and Peter and I were soon panting and trying to catch our breath. Doc was determined to give us as much pleasure as he could with his tongue and his lips, while his hands were cupping our balls. Peter and I resumed our kissing and I took his face in both my hands to be sure he wouldn't go away. I put as much love in that kiss as I could manage. Peter meanwhile was caressing my chest and playing with my nipples, pinching them from time to time. That sent an electric jolt through my whole body, awakening every nerve ending from the top of my head till the last one in my toes. Doc stood up and joined us in our kissing and it was Peter's turn to get to his knees and service us orally. He didn't take us both at the same time but alternated between Doc and my cock. He was licking the shafts, sucking the heads and eating our balls as if there was no tomorrow. All the while, Doc had a finger pushed up in my ass and was massaging my prostate. This was exciting me to the point of having to push Peter from my cock if I didn't want to come right away. As he came up to join us in the kiss, his hand wandered to my ass- cheeks and he could feel Doc had a finger in my ass. That didn't prevent him to wet his finger with saliva and enter me as well. The two fingers were playing around in my ass and rubbing over my joy button. I was oozing pre-cum like never before and couldn't believe the sensations that were flooding my whole being. It didn't take them long to both add a second finger in my opening and they were stretching my ass- muscle to its widest extend. Those four fingers played around so much that I was wondering if their was a whole army of fingers up there. Doc turned me around and wrapped me in his strong arms, pressing my chest to his and kissing me furiously. That gave Peter the chance to position himself behind me and point his cock-head right on target. A little ore saliva was added to my already wet hole. I felt Peter push softly till his mushroom passed my sphincter. He then held still for a moment and wrapped his arms between my chest and Doc's. He was pinching and twisting four nipples at the time and I just wondered how he could do that, but he did. Long moans escaped our throats while Peter pushed into me slowly. I could feel his cock invade my insides and filling me with his care and love. I was pressed against Doc who held me steady on my feet and licking my ears. All my senses were in overload and once I felt Peter's pubes on my ass, I thought I was going to faint from pure pleasure.

I was sandwiched between those two gorgeous men, Peter filling my ass and my cock pressed against Doc's. The natural lubricant that was our sweat made the rubbing even more pleasurable. Peter started an in-and-out pumping and each time I was afraid his cock would plop out. It didn't. He knew exactly what he was doing and with each inwards thrust he almost crashed my prostate. I wrapped my arms around Doc's neck as to be sure I would not fall as my legs started to be weak. Nonetheless, I had still enough strength to push my ass backwards each time Peter pushed in me. That provoked of course a supplementary friction of Doc and my cock together. I felt that familiar tingle in my nuts and knew I was about to spurt the biggest load ever as it was already several months since I last had an orgasm. I wanted to warn my friends that I was going to shoot, but had no time. The eruption from my dick was forceful and my first load even reached Doc's chin. With that first spurt I contracted my ass-muscles really hard and almost could hold Peter in place, but his pent-up desire couldn't hold him in place. He suddenly increased his speed and with each ass-muscle contraction he reached closer to his own climax. I had just shot six or seven spurts of hot juice between our bellies when Peter started to fill me up. Doc felt it and was sent over the edge in no time. His juices mixed with mine while Peter emptied his balls in my bowels.

Suddenly it was all over. We stayed pressed together and I couldn't feel safer and satisfied. I broke the kiss with Doc and turned my head as far as I could to meet Peter's lips. We were catching our breaths and let our heartbeats coming back to normal, all the while kissing and caressing. We were drenched in cum and sweat and saliva. I looked at my two friends and if their state was any indication of how I looked, I must have looked awfully messed up, but with a very content smirk on my face.

We disentangled and took our underwear to clean up a bit of the mess we made. Than we slipped on our trousers and going commando as their was no way to put our briefs back on. I had the three briefs in my hand and had a wicked idea, but didn't tell my friends about it.

We were soon on the path back to my car. We hopped in and we went back to the city. On the way Doc's mobile rang. He took the call and when he was finished he said:

• Show me what's under the hood Frank, I have an emergency!

I pushed my foot on the accelerator and the car roared forward with the strength of the bi-turbo engine. We reached his practice in record time. He jumped out of the car and said he would call later. Peter and I drove back to my house. All the way peter left his hand on my thigh. I loved the feeling and soon had my hand on his and our fingers intertwined. It was only when I parked the car on the driveway that we broke the contact as I had to put the shifting gearstick in Parking.

We went into the house and straight to the bathroom. Our cum had dried and was sticking into our body hair. A warm shower solved the problem but caused another one, as we were both hard again. We played for a while under the cascading water. We kissed a lot and we both shot another load down the drain. When we got out, we dried each other off and I went to the closet to retrieve some briefs for Peter and myself. As it was warm, we didn't care to dress anymore than that.

As peter was almost living with me since I came back from the hospital, he knew his way around in the house and the kitchen. He went straight to the fridge and looked inside to see what he could come up with for our evening meal. I came behind him and wrapped my arms around his chest, looking over his shoulder to see what he was looking for. I must say he had kept the fridge well stocked. I had not realized everything he had done for me while I was "out". As my arms were around his chest, he put his arms on mine and even if we were looking in the fridge, we didn't see anything. We were both absorbed in our thoughts. For the first time sine the tragic Saturday morning when Jeremy left my life, I felt comfortable and safe. I had the feeling that when we were in our secret spot, Jeremy had encouraged me to go on with my life and enjoying it. I knew I didn't need his permission, but nonetheless I had the feeling he had given it to me, the permission to love again.

That night, Peter didn't sleep in the guest-room. He shared my bed. I was a little nervous as I remembered the last time I had shared this bed. I tried to convince myself that it was nonsense to think that way, but Peter felt there was something wrong. I sat up in bed and he wrapped his arms around me. He told me to take my time, but to let out what was on my mind. I breathed several times quite deep and told him my apprehension. He let me speak out my feelings and my fears, without interrupting me once. He just held me tight. It was not a conversation as I was the only one to talk. He urged me to let it all out, and I did. I expressed myself quite clearly, to the point of surprising myself. I was speaking and at the same time listening to myself. When I heard myself saying something that was not right, I corrected myself. I went on speaking like that for over an hour. I a certain way I was exorcising myself and get all the negative thoughts out of my system. I even started to smile and although Peter was behind me, it seemed he could sense it.

When I finally had said all that was worrying me, Peter squeezed me a little more tightly in his arms.

• You know, he said, I was so happy to see you genuinely smile again for the first time today. I know you had a rough time, but I longed to see your smile again. I am sure Jeremy liked it as well.

I was really moved by his words, but didn't lose my smile. I looked at him and when our eyes met, there was a very special sparkle in them. I told Peter there was one last thing I wanted to do. He looked at me quizzically and I said I wanted to watch the video of the funeral of Jeremy. He asked if I was sure and I said yes. We got out of bed and went downstairs. He got the disk in the player and switched on the television. Some one had clearly edited it, as there were titles and general views. The place was decorated with hundreds of flowers, all white roses. The place was packed and I could clearly recognize a lot of our friends, some co-workers of Jeremy and even some of my co-workers as well as my boss. There was a beautiful music playing (that I didn't know) and Peter assured me it was the music that actually played at the ceremony. As Jeremy was not a religious man, there was no priest. At best you could call the guy a master of ceremony. He addressed the crowd with simple words, inviting anyone to come forward and say a few words about Jeremy. It was really moving to see how much people wanted to pay their respects to him and there were even a few words for my healing as well. All in all it was a beautiful and simple ceremony. You could hear, but not see, a lot of people who were crying and some devastated faces. The ceremony ended with a song from CŽline Dion "Just walk away".

A single tear came out of my eyes. I turned towards Peter and thanked him for such a beautiful ceremony and for the magnificent video that was made of it. I surprised him by standing up, going to the kitchen and taking a bottle of Champagne. It was a bottle Jeremy had bought to christen my new car! I opened the bottle and took two glasses out of the cupboard. Peter looked at me with a stunned look.

• Listen Peter; I have been through an awful time. This afternoon we have had a very special connection with Jeremy. This video has given me the chance to say goodbye to him. I know he wants me to go on with my life and he would be horrified if I was shutting myself out of the world. He would want me to live, to laugh and to enjoy the things life is offering me. We all know the future is a big question mark and that we can't take anything for granted. Hence the fact that everything was turned upside down for me, and as well for all of our friends, when he left us so abruptly. We have to live to the fullest. We have to live each day as if it was the last one.

I took the two glasses of Champagne and handed one to Peter.

• Let's toast Peter. Let's toast to life itself, to Jeremy telling us everything is going to be all right. To the love you show me everyday and that I hope and even think I will be able to respond in a proper way.

With that I gave him a loving kiss. We lifted our glasses and drank.

Peter was beaming and from the look in his eyes I guessed I was, too. We went back to bed and made passionate love till the early hours of the morning. We slept in each other's arms and when I woke up I felt fresh and full of energy. I jumped out of bed, went to the bathroom to empty my bladder and brush my teeth. I went downstairs and started a fresh pot of coffee and started on breakfast. The smells must have reached Peter's nose as he came down the stairs and wrapped his arms around me and kissed me deeply.

We sat down at the table and had a healthy breakfast. When we finished and the kitchen was tidied up we went to the bathroom and saved some water by showering together. Of course there was a lot of kissing and grabbing and once more our juices went down the drain. I don't know if we really saved any water as it turned cold before we were finished. We dressed and went out on the patio as the sun was warming up the day and it looked like we would have a summer day in spring. We were standing there, arms wrapped around each other and I felt good, almost happy. I knew Jeremy's memory would haunt me in the future, but I knew I had his blessing.

• I know I have to thank quite some people for the condolences they sent. I think that, as I was not at the funeral, we will have them all over here, but not in a sad mood. We will throw a huge party and remember Jeremy in the way he lived: joyfully. What do you think?

• I think that is a brilliant idea Frank. Saying goodbye the same way he lived is marvelous. I know quite some people will think it is not the proper thing to do, but I agree wholeheartedly with you.

• Those who think it is not a proper thing to do, have not appreciated or known Jeremy well and for my part they can stay away. Let's just throw that party and celebrate life as much as we can.

To be continued? Yes, if you guys let me know you like the story! Thanks for all those who already wrote to me telling me they loved it. Send me a message to amahy1957@gmail.com Please keep on donating to Nifty to keep the site free !!!