Firstly, I want to say I do not know nor do I make any presumptions about the sexuality of the Backstreet Boys nor any other celebrities who may appear in this story. This story is entirely the product of the sick imagination of the author.
Secondly, you should know that I am English, I live in London, and that is where at least the first couple of chapters are set, sorry, but it's the only city I really know well enough to describe in great detail!!!
There's also a couple of things I'd like to say to any authors out there, read a couple of stories like Forever, Josh and Just, My New Life, Brian and Justin, and there's probably a few others I can't think of, but they are great stories, especially Forever (but I advise you not to read Equilibrium - it's a bit too depressing for my liking, and it hasn't been finished which is really annoying), it is a really beautiful story and addresses so many emotions it's incredible - trust me, it is the Holy Grail of the Nifty author.
Oh yeah, I'd also like to thank Jimmy for writing to me so much about this story, I pray that his back surgery goes ok, and keep on searching I'm sure you'll find him.
On The Streets - Part 7
I slept the rest of the night pretty peacefully, admittedly the bed wasn't as comfortable as Kevin's hotel bed, but it was still pretty nice. I guess these are some of the advantages of being rich - even the hospitals treat you proper! When I woke the next day there was sun shining through the blinds into the hospital room bathing the room in a yellowish light that reminded me of lemons once the skin has been removed. I only opened my eyes partially and started to get my bearings. I looked around a little and saw the door was shut and the ensuite bathroom door was open, but the light was on. On the other side of my bed, where Nick had been sitting bashing away at his computer for most of yesterday evening before they had to go back to the hotel, was Kevin. I felt my chest heave. He was sitting with one leg folded loosely over the other and he had a newspaper folded up resting on the crook of his knee. He was wearing a black leather jacket with a dark blue t-shirt underneath and a pair of pale blue jeans. He was doing the crossword, I thought he looked so hot at that moment. Then he looked up at me.
"Oh, you're awake." He smiled at me and I smiled back. I nodded my head and he leaned over to kiss me on the forehead. That's when I noticed.
"What happened to your hair?" I looked at him surprised. His hair which had been in that weird style all knotted along the top of his head was now loose and hung around his head like a huge lion's mane. He looked even more breathtaking than normal - he looked just like one of the guys off the front of one of those cheap women's romance novels. He smirked down at me.
"We have a photo shoot today before the concert, so I thought I'd just get my hair out of the cornrows, I prefer my hair like this anyway, it's easier to manage and the other style looks ok if it's just been done, but after a while it starts to look really messy." He looked down at me expectantly.
I grabbed his jaw in my hand and tilted his head from side to side. "I like it." He grinned really widely and leant down to kiss me again. "I can get out of here now, right?"
"You could have gone three hours ago. I don't know about your sleeping habits normally, but it's gone 12 o'clock and the doctors were starting to wonder about whether you were ok, or if they'd missed something when they examined you!" I smiled up at him a little sheepishly and decided to get up - nature calling. I was a little unsteady on my feet, but apart from that I was fine and after having been to the bathroom, I decided to get dressed. I had had enough of this place for one lifetime. Then I dropped my gown that I had been wearing right in front of Kevin and started to pick up my clothes off the other chair in the room. I turned and saw Kevin smiling at me. He was obviously getting a good view, so I started flexing my butt cheeks alternately and he smiled even broader. I turned around and all of a sudden I heard a gasp coming from the doorway - it was Howie. He mumbled something about coming back later and walked out the room, a huge blush on his face. I don't know what he was so disturbed about? I mean he's seen my butt before, what difference does it make if he's seen the other side right? I cracked up laughing and I heard Kevin snickering behind me. I pulled on my trousers and the sweatshirt I had been wearing yesterday and noticed the blood spots on it. I pulled it off and just put on the t-shirt instead.
I remembered then that I had to tell Kevin about agreeing to come with him on tour, but the door opened and in walked A.J. and Howie, I guess he figured that if he was going to get another show he wasn't going to go through it alone. I decided to tell Kevin then anyway, so I turned around to face him. "Kevin, I should probably tell you now, I've decided to take you up on your offer. I'd love to travel with you and teach you anything you want to learn." Kevin's grin took up his whole face now, and he started laughing. His face looked so happy. He had tears rolling down his face, I was hoping because he was happy. He ran over to me and pulled me into a big bearhug and my feet came off the ground. I started laughing too at Kevin's over exuberance. Howie and A.J. came over too and hugged me once Kevin had put me down.
"What made up your mind?" Kevin asked with a curious expression on his face.
"I guess a lot of things, but mostly I've just well I guess it's just that I've...really liked having all you guys around me for the last couple of days. I'm not used to being surrounded by people, heck if I don't manage to pick up a trick then I can go days without talking to anyone. You have no idea how painful that can get, I guess I'm just tired of being lonely, I want be part of something and I want to be with people again." I had tears in my eyes and I knew if I carried on I would start crying, so I just stopped talking and looked down at the floor, pale blue linoleum. Kevin came over and hugged me, he put his arms around me chest and pulled me close. I slipped my arms under his armpits and held him close. The warmth of his body was very relaxing and I just stayed there for a few minutes before I felt a hand on my shoulder, it was Howie and he just squeezed my arm to show his support before backing off and talking to Kevin.
"You know we have to be out of here in five minutes if we're going to make it to the shoot on time." Kevin nodded and slowly released me. I smiled at him and backed away. I finished getting dressed and ready and we filed out the room, Kev had his arm around my shoulder, but once we got outside he dropped it, but kept close enough that every now and again when our hands swung by our sides the back of his would graze the back of mine. Man this was going to be a major change in my life.
I had a steady job now, with regular pay, admittedly it's not an office job, and I have to travel a lot, but that should be fun and I really can't wait to start travelling. If even half of what Kevin has been hinting at over the last few days, is true, then he wants to get a lot closer to me, and though that scares me a bit, I can't wait to see what happens, I know we're gonna have to have a talk about how close he wants to get and I suppose he'll want to check with the guys to see if it's ok with them that he's going out with me proper. I hope it goes ok with him, he obviously thinks very highly of the guys and they mean a lot to him.
Kevin, Howie, A.J. and I all piled into the limo, and I sat next to Kevin.
"Do you want to go back to the hotel Jared, or do you want to stay with us - we'll be going back to the hotel in an hour or two anyway, but we can just get the limo driver to drop you off."
"I'll come with you if that's ok - I don't think there's much for me to do back at the hotel anyway. It's a photo shoot right? What is it for, I mean why do you need these photos?" I decided to join them at this photo shoot, I mean how can it take an hour or two to take a few photos?
"The photos we take in the U.S. are generally not used when we get to Europe, our fan base in Europe is stronger than in America as we started out here, but apparently different photos appeal differently to different cultures and so we take new pictures and stuff for the tour specifically for the European market." I nodded in understanding. We spent most of the ride from Northwood, where the hospital was to Hampstead in silence. Kevin remembered little things about the tour that he wanted to tell me about so he carried on leaning over and whispering things in my ear like "remind me to tell you about so-and-so" or "You've gotta hear about when we did this..." but most of the time we just sat there in comfortable silence. I had never been in a limo before, so it was pretty cool just looking around. The seats were comfortable, very wide for your butt, but they tended to squash my shoulders in a bit. I guess they didn't accommodate for people with a body the shape of mine.
"We're here!" Howie shouted from the back seat. I noticed the surroundings - Hampstead, one of the most expensive and fashionable locations in London. I didn't know there was a photographers here, but hey I guess I'm not a rich pop star am I? We piled out the limo and we made our way to the door which was set back from the parade of shops. It was a single door tucked in between a book shop and a music shop. Once we went through the glass door, there was a flight of stairs which finished dead with a door. Howie, who was leading the queue, knocked and we entered one by one. Once I was in I had a chance to look around. The studio must have gone over the top of the two shops on either side. It was really huge and really empty. There was one wall with scenery hanging up against it, and another wall was obviously the main set where they stood, there were stools set out for people to sit on as they had their photo taken, but the rest of the studio was blank - I mean it, it was plain white. Kevin snickered when he saw the confusion on my face.
"Yeah it does look boring doesn't it? You would have these artistic types would have embraced the colour spectrum wouldn't you?" I turned and laughed with him. I heard the photographer call Kevin - the rest of the guys had already sat down. He kissed me then ran over. Then I noticed Mark sitting on a chair over at the other end of the studio. There was a chair next to him, so I went and sat down.
"Hey Mark." I smiled as I looked over at him. He apparently wasn't very talkative - he just nodded in response. "Is something wrong Mark?"
"No Sir."
"I told you don't call me that - just call me Jared." He nodded again and looked down at the floor.
"I'm still very sorry about my actions last night si...Jared, they were totally uncalled for and it is very unprofessional of me for me to allow my personal feelings towards the group to affect me ability to protect them, and that extends to you as a guest of the group."
"Well, there's not much we can do about that is there Mark? Unless of course you want me to hit you the way you hit me?" He looked at me, and realising I had a huge smirk on his face, he smiled back a big toothy grin. I think he accepted that he was forgiven.
The photo shoot was long and boring, and Mark told me that if I wanted to I could go down and have a look in the shops around the studio. I agreed and as I walked out I cast a quick look over at the guys. A.J. was looking up at me, with one side of his mouth lifted up in a smile, Howie was grinning at me, as was Nick, Brian was obviously still angry with me, and he ignored me as I walked out the door, and Kevin had a frown on his face. I mouthed to him that I was going to check out the bookshop downstairs. He quickly stood up from his stool and came over to me with his jacket in hand. "Here, put this on, it's cold outside and you don't have a sweatshirt because of the blood on that other one. Did you want to buy anything while you were down there?" Now, I hadn't bought a book in about 2 and a half years. I loved reading, but I never had the money to buy books or anywhere to put them to prevent them from getting damaged. I think Kevin caught on at my hesitation. "Don't worry, if you feel uncomfortable taking money from me, I'll take it out your pay check." He grinned at me, I knew he wouldn't take it back, even if he said he would. "And, don't worry you can store books on the tour bus, there's loads of room on the bookshelves, Nick and I are the only ones who read very much. Well either way, if you need any money, there's about a hundred pounds in the inside pocket." I nodded and he held out the jacket for me to slip on. This was one nice jacket. It was black leather and had a worn-in look and feel to it, very comfortable, and by the feel of it, very expensive. I smiled up at Kevin before walking out the studio and down the stairs. I turned right, then right again into the bookshop. It was like an English student's dream come true - a hundred pounds in my pocket and shelves of row upon row of books.
I started looking up and down the rows. Eventually, I stopped, took a deep breath and came to a conclusion about what I wanted to get. I found a salesperson and got them to find the stuff for me, after all, the shop was empty, she looked pretty bored and by the looks of things, she found me pretty nice to look at, so she had no problems with getting the stuff for me. I ended up getting a Shakespearean play, a book of poetry, a book on the Backstreet Boys, well I considered that I would be working for them, so I thought I might as well know about them right? And finally I got a study guide for an English course. I had a plan brewing in my head. The total came to just under £30, which I found in Kevin's jacket. I was just picking up the bag off the counter when Kevin came up behind me, wearing, of all things, a cowboy hat. It was a bit of a shock andI looked up at him with a confused look in my eyes, though I had to admit he looked pretty damn good. I heard a sort of mindless babbling behind me and when I turned around, the girl behind the counter was motioning towards Kevin with her finger and spouting bits of his name kinda like "K...Ke...K...Kev...Kevi...K...Kevin" This went on for some time before I pointed out that it was Kevin yes and would she like an autograph, I knew it was cheeky of me as I wouldn't be the one doing the signing but she nodded and ran off to the music section of the store, returning a moment later with a Backstreet Boys book which Kevin happily signed. We then walked out the store and once we were outside we stood there for a while.
"What happened? Has the shoot finished?"
"Yeah, about 20 minutes ago, you've been in there over an hour and a half." I blushed at that, I didn't realise I'd been so wrapped up in it. "You know that jacket looks good on you." He walked off in the direction of the limousine and got in. I followed him and as I got in I tripped straight over Brian who ignored me as I got up and sat next to Kevin.
"So, what are you guys up to now?" I couldn't remember the arrangements for a concert day.
"We have sound check in about an hour, then we have to start getting ready for our first concert. Man, this is going to be so cool, the tickets sold out for this concert quicker than we've ever seen before, the fans are gonna love this!" A.J. was obviously proud of their show and was psyched about performing at Wembley.
"Are you, you know, um coming?" Kevin asked me. I turned to him and saw a longing in his eyes. I nodded and he smiled again. I wish I could keep that smile on his face forever, he looked so good and so happy when he smiled. I wondered if I could keep it up, or be the reason for that smile staying on his face for the whole tour? Kevin was still looking into my eyes. Finally, he moved his lips in closer and kissed me gently on the lips. I sighed into the kiss and enjoyed its sweetness. Kevin tasted great. I couldn't believe that I had fallen for this guy so much so fast. He was gorgeous admittedly, and that might have helped the situation along, but he was more than that, so much more.
We broke the kiss, and I suddenly felt very self conscious and I looked up carefully, seeing each of the guys in turn. A.J. had a bemused expression on his face, Howie was blushing slightly. Nick seemed to be amused by our show of affection and by how Kevin and I were both obviously taken aback by the strength of the warmth in the kiss. I saw Brian, he seemed genuinely shocked. I wasn't sure whether it was because we had kissed in front of him and he was disgusted or just the fact that we had both enjoyed it despite the fact that in his books it was supposedly a sin. A tear dropped down his cheek.
The other guys one by one caught on to my confused expression and looked at Brian and saw the tears run down his cheeks. "What's wrong Bri?"
"Yeah what's up man?"
"Cuz, are you ok?"
"I'm sorry ok?" Brian was genuinely upset. "I'm sorry I acted like such an asshole, I didn't mean to ruin so many relationships for you Kevin, I guess I never thought that you would ever truly be happy in a relationship with a guy, I'm so sorry. I really didn't mean to hurt either of you, and Jared, I'm sorry that I tried to use religion against you, when you're right, religion can't be used to justify one person's standpoint, especially not when love is involved, and above all, a love which is as deep as yours, after all, God is Love, and He would want nothing more than to see two of his creations happy together, I'm so sorry I've been acting like this, I've been trying to come to terms with Kevin for a long time now, and I think I finally understand, but I can't forgive myself for how I've acted all this time, ruining Kevin's relationships and trying to ruin yours and Kevin's, Jared. Please forgive me Jared, I don't know if I can forgive myself if you don't forgive me." The depth of Brian's emotions scared me quite a bit, I could tell he was sincere, and by the end I had tears welling up in my eyes too. I kneeled down in front of Brian who was sitting on the back seat of the limo and pulled him into a hug. I could feel his body convulsing in silent sobs and I felt the t-shirt I was wearing soak through - why did I take the jacket off? I leaned in close to his ear.
"I forgive you Brian." His tears slowed to a stop after I whispered in his ear. I pulled back from his embrace and smiled at him, then sat back in my seat next to Kevin. Kevin gathered me into his own arms and kissed me on the temple before whispering 'thank you' into my ear. I smiled back at him, my eyes feeling decidedly puffy from crying with Brian.
We pulled up to the stadium and there was a large crowd of girls waiting outside the main entrance, so we went in through what would normally be the footballers' entrance and made our way down a ramp, past what would normally be the dressing rooms for teams to a slightly smaller dressing room and went in. The room was probably the size of a large office, and had hooks around the walls, there was also a table set up with some food on it. The room itself reminded me of school changing rooms - I half expected there to be a shower without partitions in there, that's when I realised there was another door in the room, and looking over Howie's shoulder when he checked in there, I realised that there was indeed a typical boys' school shower in there. The guys said that they were just going to dump their stuff and then they were heading up for sound check. I followed them up onto the stage and sat down behind them while they stood at the microphones and started warming up. They went through one by one singing out a bit and talking through the microphones as well, I presumed that that was because they also talked to the crowds once the concert started. First Brian went up, he shouted out a few words to the sound technician, then started singing. His voice sounded out over the stadium. I had to admit that it was one of the most beautiful voices I'd ever heard. When he started singing my eyes shot up from where they were staring at the floor and latched onto him. He was really throwing the full weight of his voice behind it and the stage literally shook with the sound of his voice. The vibrato in his voice was incredible and every not sounded to me like perfect pitch. I was astounded - I'd always heard that these pop groups couldn't sing! He finished and Howie took his place. Brian walked back to where I was sitting and sat on the stage a few feet away. I still looked at him with amazement - I'd never heard such a beautiful voice as his. He noticed me staring and looked up at me and smiled.
"You have a really beautiful voice." I was still amazed by it.
"Thank you." He looked down at the floor, seemingly shy.
Howie wasn't as good as Brian, but in his own range he hit the notes pretty good. Nick was up next and he hit almost as good as Brian, but he had a slightly more 'rock' sound to his voice like he was shouting more than singing. A.J. also had a good voice, similar to Howie's, but louder. Then Kevin took the stand. I guessed the moment he started that he was the bass of the group. He sung out loud and his voice was an opposite of Brian's - he hit each note perfectly and his vibrato was as good as Brian's, but his range was obviously much lower than Brian's. I wondered what the two of them would sound like if they sung together. Kevin was standing at the very edge of the stage and I could see that he was looking at me out of the corner of his eye.
The other guys' heads shot up when they heard Kevin's voice - I thought it was beautiful, but I had no idea what the guys' problem was, so I just sat back and listened until he had finished. When he had, he took a step back from the microphone and then turned to face us with a smile on his face. All the others had congregated around me and Brian and were sitting watching Kevin. Howie started slow clapping and gradually got faster and the other guys joined in. Seeing them clapping, I looked over at Kevin confused. He ran up to me and pulled me into a kiss. When I pulled back, he looked at me with a glint in his eyes. I was still confused, but then I heard the guys talking.
"Man Kevin, I've never heard you sing like that, that was amazing!"
"Yeah Kev, Nick's right, it was awesome." Howie added in.
"When did you get so damned good cuz? What you do take your talent pills this morning?" Brian laughed.
"That was cool, I can't believe how well some of those notes came out man!" Kevin grinned a big grin to the other guys and then looked down at me again. He had one arm around me and his hand was rested in the small of his back.
"Thank you Jared." He whispered into my ear.
"For what, Kev?"
"I was singing like that cos I was happy, I'm happy you're here, and I'm happy you're coming on tour with us." He leant in and kissed the top of my head. "And I think you look really good in that jacket." He smirked at me. I took a deep swallow and sighed. It felt good to be here. I liked being with Kevin, even if things didn't go the way I think he wanted them to go, he was a good guy and I liked him a lot.
"We'd better make our way back soon, the opening acts have to set up and the fans will be coming in soon." Howie interjected.
"Yeah, come on Kevin, you can carry this on downstairs."
We made our way back down the ramp and into the smaller dressing room. The guys started to strip, I have to say I had a pretty good time looking at Howie, he had a pretty good body. Then I saw Kevin scowling at me and I started looking at his body instead. He had a very good body actually and I smiled when I looked down and saw he was slightly hard. I wished the other guys weren't here and Kevin and I could have had a little fun. They pulled on some costumes which had been left in the changing room. Kevin was dressed in a shiny black top and black trousers which looked faintly shiny. [sorry, can't think of any better way to describe his outfit in the Larger than Life video!]
"You can watch from the wings Jared, there's some chairs set out up there for people we want to watch the show, so I'll get Mark to take you up there ok?" I nodded at Kevin and Mark entered to tell the guys they only had 5 minutes. Kevin explained about taking me to the wings and Mark led me up there. I was sat in a seat just to the side of the stage and I gasped when I looked out to the audience and saw the throngs of girls out there. I couldn't believe the noise they were producing - I'm just glad I was shielded partially by a wall, though it wasn't much.
About two minutes after that, the guys came on stage. Well, that wouldn't be precisely right. A.J. was hoisted in. He had a rope tied around his waist and he literally flew onto the stage in a single jump. He laughed the most evil laugh I have ever heard and then a creepy beat started up. Brian jumped over the scenery along the back of the stage and Nick jumped in from the side I had been sitting on. He jumped partially over me and I swear it is the creepiest thing to see someone land about twenty feet in front of you when you didn't even know they were behind you! Kevin and Howie appeared, suspended from the roof rafters of the scenery. They all started singing, but A.J.'s voice carried over them all to sing the main verse line. It was a great song. It had me stamping my feet to the beat anyway. I found out later it was called 'Larger Than Life', and was apparently one of their more popular songs.
The guys finished that song with a flourish and a final dance step that looked pretty cool, then a group of other dancers came on stage and Brian started singing: 'Doesn't really matter what you've said or done, as long as ... ' This song was pretty nice too, though perhaps a little too wishy-washy for my liking. I found out it was called 'As Long As You Love Me' from one of the stage hands nearby. As soon as that song was finished, the dancers ran off stage, five of them returning with stools which the guys took and sat on. Brian addressed the audience, said something about them all having a good time and told them that the next song meant a lot to all the guys. They all came in together without any music and sang out: "Show me the meaning of being lonely" It was kinda creepy, really spooky sounding, and the music came out and it reverberated all around, very mellow, and sounded a little like a phantom of the opera type tune. All the guys had their section of the tune, and they each stood up to do their bit, and then Kevin took to the centre spot:
"LIFE GOES ON AS IT NEVER ENDS, EYES OF STONE OBSERVE THE TRENDS, THEY NEVER SING FOREVER GAZE IF ONLY..." he put such force behind his words that the stadium instantly hushed, and I think the rest of the guys came in late when they all started singing again, but what the audience didn't notice was that Kevin had been watching me when he sung those words, and I was shocked at how beautifully they came out and how much feeling he put into them. The songs carried on.
The rest of the concert went by pretty uneventfully - Kevin carried on waving at me, or winking at me, but then so did the rest of the guys. I was beginning to wonder what the audience would think. especially when both A.J. and Nick waved to me at the same time. It must have looked pretty strange! Only one other song really caught my attention - 'The One' - I thought it was a really cool and definitely a very upbeat song. The guys came off the stage at a run and Kevin ran straight to me. He picked me up in a hug and twirled around and around with me in his arms. I grimaced as he swung me back and forwards - he must have been seriously pumped on the excitement of performing cos there was no way he was normally strong enough to do this! He explained how they had to go and get showered and changed before they could leave. I nodded and they walked into the changing rooms. I waited out in the wings and saw the fans slowly leave - I guess they were waiting around in the vain hope that they would get to see their favourite band again. After about half an hour, I felt Kevin's arms wrap around me from behind.
"The limo's just about ready to go. We should get going." I nodded and followed him out. The guys were starting to look pretty shattered - they were dragging their feet and their eyes were half closed. Once we were in the limo, Nick spread himself across a couple of seats underneath the partition between the driver and the back of the car, and A.J. and Howie sat next to each other, close enough that they could lean and use each other as a support to sleep against. Within 10 minutes of leaving the stadium, those three were all asleep. Brian and Kevin were still awake. Kevin leant over close enough to talk to me without waking up the three who were sleeping, but he spoke loud enough that Brian could hear.
"So, what did you think of the concert Jared?"
"Yeah man, how was it?"
"Well, I've not really got much to compare it to, but I thought it was an amazing show, you guys are really great singers, and it was really spectacular some of the effects you use."
"What did you think of our music?" Brian asked.
"Well there were some songs which I didn't much like. Course I liked 'Show me the meaning'. I smirked and smiled at Kevin. "But I think my favourite was probably 'The One'". I was impressed with myself for remembering the name of the song - I normally can't remember the names of songs I like. Brian perked up all of a sudden and had a really happy looking grin on his face. I turned around to Kevin and saw that he had a smirk on his face too. He started whispering in my ear:
"Brian wrote that song Jared, with a little help admittedly, but he wrote it." I was surprised - I thought most of these pop groups got people to write their songs for them. I was definitely impressed that Brian had written that song, it was a really great song with a cool melody and it really brought out the guys' voices well.
"Wow, I don't know what else to say, you're obviously a talented musician Brian, I'm impressed!" I smiled at him, and he returned it. I could see that Brian and I were going to get on fine from now on...
To Be Continued... End of Part 7
Sorry about the slightly wishy-washy ending to this part - I couldn't think of an interesting way to finish it. This is quite a long chapter, but only because I'm not sure if I can keep up this one chapter a day thing for very long. My holidays aren't that long, and once I get back I'm gonna be really busy. I will try to keep it up, though over Christmas it might be difficult! And don't even think you're getting one on Christmas Day or Boxing Day! I hope you all liked the concert - obviously I've never been to one, so I've never got to see Kevin in real life, though I can keep on dreaming can't I? I hope everyone is still interested in the story and thank you for all the emails! Oh yeah, I do need anyone who's travelled a lot in America to help with the tour once it gets to the US, or even a bit of help if anyone is from China or Japan, I've only been to those places once so it might be a bit difficult, anyone willing to help would be greatly appreciated. Anyway, hope you enjoyed the long chapter, hope to hear from you soon!