** This one is a weird segment.... ** Thanks for all your comments and suggestion for the story. ** As you can tell, these things take an enormous amount of time. ** It is very difficult to juggle this story, school and work.
** A little modification here...Removed the "excess scenes" cause it ** didn't fit with the story all that much.
** As usual comments, questions, suggestions at these various locations: ** zeo@sfsu.edu ICQ #31565736 AIM: zeoM Yahoo!:Zeorhymer
Chapter 5: Adoration
Justin was in his room doing his last set of push-ups. Little beads of sweat formed along his brow as his muscles strained for the last couple of presses.
"One hundred forty-eight..." he puffed, "...one hundred forty- nine, one hundred fifty...." collapsing on the last one.
He lay on his stomach on the floor as he breathed heavily from exhaustion. A knock echoed from his door.
"Come in," he said.
The door knob turned and the door opened. JC walked in the room and quickly closed the door behind him. Justin rolled over on his back and saw JC. He noticed that JC wasn't wearing a shirt, just boxers. Justin examined JC's sculpted body from the floor, admiring his firm chest and well-defined abs. He was always jealous of JC being so well build even though JC didn't work out that much and he had to bust his ass off to try to look like that.
"What's up?" finally asking.
"Nothing much," JC walking towards the bed and sitting on the edge.
"Then why are you here?" Justin getting off the floor and sitting next to JC.
"Can't sleep."
"Well, it's only 9."
"I know, I know," looking at the floor, "I wanted to sleep early, but I can't."
Then, Justin scooted behind JC and put his hands on his shoulders and squeezed a little. "You're really tense," he commented as he started to massage JC's back.
JC closed his eyes and titled his head back, "I had a lot of things on my mind lately."
"Oh, I see," as Justin slowly worked is way down to his back.
"Mmmmm," that feels really good, "I don't know why we pay people to do this while you could do it for free."
"Well, I want to get a rub-down once in a while too you know," laughing at JC's comment.
Once Justin reach his lower back, he slowly started back up towards the shoulders. As Justin was rubbing JC's back, he noticed that JC was loosening up a little. He started to rub harder and JC just moaned a little. The slow circular movements of Justin's strong hands made their way across JC's back. JC was totally out of it. All he could feel was the pressure that Justin was applying.
Justin motioned JC to lie on his bed face down. He straddled across JC's back and resumed his rhythmical motion. All JC could get out was "Mmmmmmm." He had been tense all day and was starting to finally relax. Things haven't been going quite right with JC.
"Isn't Amy supposed to be doing this?" Justin asked.
"We broke up a couple of days ago," JC breathed out.
"Oh, I'm sorry," apologizing.
"No, don't be."
"What happened?" Justin being inquisitive.
"Well, you know that all of us went to the club the day we met with Mano, right?"
"Yeah."
"Well while we were dancing, I decided to sit down while Amy stayed on the dance floor. Chris then came over and told me that Amy was flirting with another guy. I didn't believe him, but I had to find out. I looked around the club and found her making out with another guy in the corner. When we left the club, I told her that I couldn't be with anyone who goes behind my back. She bitched and complained that I was being unfair and selfish, but I didn't care."
"I told you she was shallow."
"I guess you were right."
"I'm surprised we don't have sex," Justin changed the subject.
JC's head quickly sat up, whipped in Justin's direction and looked at him in shock, "What!! You're sick!"
"Considering that we're this close to each other, I'm surprised that we don't go all the way," stating rather factly.
"Would you fuck Johnathan if he was old enough?" JC still looking at him.
"Hell no!" surprised at the question, "He's my freaking brother. You swear I'll do that to him"
"My point exactly, I don't want to fuck my brother."
Justin was stunned at what JC had just said, "You really mean that?"
"Well of course I do," looking back in disbelief, "I've known you since the Mickey Mouse Club and I love you as a brother," smiling back.
Justin sat there for a moment and then reached over and gave JC a long, deep hug.
Once Justin let go, JC look at him quizzically, "What was that for?"
"It was something that Mano had said while we were hanging out."
"Which was?" cocking an eyebrow.
"I'll tell it to you someday," Justin smiling, "Speaking of which...I wonder how he's going to handle Lance?"
"I don't know," JC thought about the question, "But if he affected you this much, I think he's gonna be OK," they both laughed.
JC sighed after the laughter.
"What's up," Justin looking concerned.
"It's about Mano," JC replied.
"Oh?" looking puzzled.
"It's just that he's leaving in two days and I was just getting to know him..." trailing off.
"I know how you feel," putting a hand on JC's shoulder, "He's a real good guy and fun to be around with."
"Yeah. From what I heard, Chris and Joey is gonna miss him too." JC then sat on the bed in silence.
"You know what?" Justin getting an idea in his head, "Why don't you spend time with him tomorrow on his last day here."
JC looked at Justin first with happiness and then sadness, "I can't."
"Why not?"
"Don't you remember? All of us have to be in the studio for the final segment of the single."
Justin thought for a moment, "We'll be finished by 3 in no time. As long as we don't goof off, we can make it."
"You really think so?"
"Yep," Justin smiling back.
"Thanks," as JC gave him a quick hug, "I'd better get some sleep now."
JC stood up and walked to the door. As he reached the doorknob, Justin cleared his throat.
"Don't worry about it," Justin smiled, "Everything's gonna work out fine."
They both smiled and JC walked back to his room. Justin laid back down to his bed. 'I really am going to miss him,' he thought to himself. 'I don't know how, but he has affected us all,' pondering what he and the rest of guys are going to do on the last day of my stay in Orlando. He reached over and flicked off the lights.
JC, Justin and Chris lay on their bed staring at the ceiling, all thinking the same thing, 'What's gonna happen now?' With that thought, all of them drifted in a deep sleep, dreaming of all the things that happened in that short amount of time since they met me.
The sun slowly rose from the horizon as the beams of light illuminated my room. I was still asleep when the phone started to ring. Heard the phone, but didn't bother to get it hoping that it would stop. It kept going after the fourth ring. I clumsily reached over to grab the receiver, almost knocking the phone to the ground.
"Hello," I said groggily in the phone.
"Hey, Mano sorry to wake you up," Lance answered back.
"Hi Lance," I replied, "Do you know what time it is?" still groggy.
"Yeah, it's 6 in the morning and I'm really sorry about it."
"This had better be good," trying to sound upset, but couldn't being half-asleep.
"I was wondering if you want to go get some breakfast with me," kinda begging me.
"I don't know," I said, "I'm still tired from yesterday's trek."
"Please..." he begged.
"OK, OK. I'll get breakfast," giving in, "Let me get changed first. Then meet me here in twenty minutes."
"Nope, don't have to," there was a knock at the door.
I got up, walked to the door and opened it. I nearly jumped when I saw Lance standing there with is cell phone in his ear.
"Now, why didn't I see this coming?" I said sarcastically.
Lance laughed, "Am I that predictable?"
I ushered him in and again he sat on the bed. I looked through my stuff for something to wear. It was deja vu. I was repeating the same things that I did yesterday, but this time I felt at ease with Lance this time around. I went into the bathroom and quickly changed. This time, he was patiently waiting for me on the bed.
"Lets go," I told him.
He got up and both of us exited the room. We walked to the elevators and I pushed the down button.
"OK, where to?" I asked.
"I was hoping that we could get a quick breakfast and then I want to totally destroy you at a game before I go to work," Lance replied sounding confident.
I cocked an eyebrow at him, "What is it, wham..bamm..thank you ma'am?" replying seriously.
Lance's face flushed a bright pink hue, "No...umm...I mean..."
I laughed, "Just kidding. You're too serious," as we stepped into the elevator.
I had to admit, I got a kick out of doing that to him. Maybe its my subconscious torturing the poor guy as Chris would have done to me. Once Lance regained his composure, we started to chat about how the next time we played that he would be ready for anything. We continued on gaming strategies until the elevator reached the lobby. The door opened and Lance stepped out first.
"I see you have recovered," noticing that he was no longer limping.
He turned around, "Yeah, thanks to you I can walk fine now."
"It was no problem."
"After I dropped you off, I went to the hospital to get it looked at. They were surprised that I had a bruised ankle that severe and yet managed to walk without much difficulty. The doctor commented on the expertise that went into patching my ankle."
"I really didn't think I was that good," looking surprised.
"Are you always like that?" changing the subject.
"Like what?" not knowing where this was going.
"Always belittling yourself."
I just looked at the ground, "I don't know..."
"Stop acting like that," Lance putting his hand on my shoulder, "You know your stuff, be proud of what you can do and its OK to show off once in a while."
"Well...I guess," I looked back up at him.
Lance smiled and put his arm over my shoulder, "That's the spirit," as we walked out of the hotel.
"Where do you want to eat?" finally asking.
"Well," he thought for a minute, "I have to get to work by 9:30 so we can't go very far."
"That doesn't leave us with very many options," I stated.
"Yeah, I know," sighing, "Oh wait!" Lance thought of an idea, "We can go in Disney World to get something to eat. After we finish, I'll kick your butt in a rematch."
I looked at him, "Are you sure? The park doesn't open for another hour."
"Don't worry," he assured me, "I can get us in."
"Well...OK," reluctantly agreeing.
It was a short trip to the park from the hotel. Along the way, I admired the various trees lining the sidewalk that filtered the sunlight. Many of them were maple trees, fanning their broad, green colored leaves to the sun. But a few of them were large weeping willows with branches gently swaying the breeze, nearly touching the ground.
"These are really beautiful trees," I commented as we walked by each of them.
"You think so?" Lance asked.
"What, you think they're ugly?" questioning him.
"Its just I've never knew they were beautiful."
"You probably noticed, but never thought about it," looking at Lance, "With your busy schedule, you probably don't have the time to stop and admire what's around you."
Lance contemplated a little, "You know, you're right. I have seen these trees many times, but never really admired them."
"The simple things are the most beautiful and easiest ones to pass by. Once you realize they're not there anymore, you start to..." I stopped realizing what I had just said.
"You start to..." Lance tried to urge me to continue.
"Um...oh...nevermind," I tried to close the subject.
Lance shrugged his shoulders, "Hey we're here," as he looked forward, towards the park office.
We entered the office and I stood in the small lobby. Lance went to the counter and asked for the manager. He chatted with him for a while and then turned and talked to me.
"Everything's set," he smiled, "We can go in and eat."
"You've got to tell me how you do that," I exaggerated.
"One day I will," he laughed back.
We went inside and were ushered toward one of the large employee buildings. Once in, we stood in line a the breakfast buffet. All the chatting which I heard before we walked in were replaced with whispers. I got pancakes, some fruit, and juice while Lance put some French toast, bacon, eggs, and a glass of milk. As we put food on our plates, all I can make out from the whispers were, 'Oh my God, it's Lance.' I shouldn't be fazed by all of this, being used to it and all, but couldn't help be curious about who these guys are. We then proceeded to sit at a table outside of the building. It was a nice, warm morning to have breakfast outside. There were birds chirping, greeting the morning sun as well as a few hawks soaring far above our heads. First time doing this kind of thing. As I was eating, I felt something...unusual.
"How come you're not with the rest of the guys?" I asked finally figuring out what was wrong.
Lance stopped eating and looked at me kinda shocked, "The...guys are sleeping right now and I told them yesterday that I was going to the studio first," sounding pretty confident at his answer.
"OK," knowing that he wasn't fully telling me truth, but played along anyway.
Lance resumed his breakfast and he would glance at my plate once in a while, "Do you want some bacon?" he asked.
"No thanks. Meat totally messes up my body. That's why I don't eat much of it," I said in between bites of chopped fruit.
"I see," continuing on his food.
I was eating breakfast feeling very content. Never in my life have I ever been so happy, but the uneasy feeling lingered in the back of my mind. I knew that I was leaving tomorrow and it's going to be the same old lonely shit I've come to expect back home. I really am going to miss them all.
"Hey Mano," Lance spoke up.
I snapped back to attention, "Oh...um...yeah?"
"It's 7:30 already and I want to play a few games with you before I go," he said eagerly.
"Sure, lets go."
"The arcades are over there in that building," pointing behind me.
"You really know this place, don't you?"
"Just say that the guys and I have been here many, many times before."
"Since I got here, I wanted to go to Universal Studios."
Lance's eyes bugged out a little, "That place is boring," he said rather quickly.
"How so?" noticing something strange.
"Umm..." scrambling for an answer, "It's just a lot full of movie and TV sets, empty lots, music studios..." recoiling at his last words.
"Huh?" knowing that something was definitely was up.
"Let's go play before the park opens," Lance abruptly getting up and pulling at my arm.
I gave up knowing I wasn't going to get anything from him. I made a mental note to go to Universal right before I left town. That's where I'll get my questions solved. We zigzagged through some buildings and went into the arcade room. I was impressed with the layout. There were many large VR machines that lined the walls as well as forming a circle in the center of the place. There was also a basement where people can play laser tag. I should have been here earlier.
Once we went in, I walked over to the change machine and started to put a dollar bill in. Lance put his hand on mine and told me that the games are on the house until the park opened. I smiled at him and shook my head in amazement. We started playing Virtua-On, a 3D robot fighting game, and I easily beat Lance every time. He was frustrated that he couldn't touch me in the game and decided to switch to another one. We the played a tank game that I had never seen before. Naturally I was no match for him cause I've never seen the game let alone played it, but I learned quickly and gave him a run for his money.
After a while, we switched to another fighting game. Even though it was only 8:30, my eyes started to get heavy. I tried my best to keep awake by concentrating on what I was doing, but it was difficult to pull off. Lance noticed that my game degraded and turned to look at me.
"Mano, are you feeling all right?" asking me worriedly.
"Yeah, I'm fine," trying not fall asleep, "I'm still tired and I really didn't get that much sleep."
"I am so sorry for pushing you," he apologized, "We should head back anyway."
"OK, but make sure I don't fall flat on my face," I yawned out.
"Don't worry," putting his arm on my shoulder to give me support, "I won't let anything happen to you," he whispered.
I thought about what he just said, but I was too tired to really analyze it. I knew there was something more to it than that. We walked back out of the park and headed to the hotel. Once in a while I would stumble from being weak in the knees. Lucky for me Lance was there to prevent me from falling, or was it another set up? I couldn't tell cause I was so damn tired. We finally reached my room, Lance half dragging me to the door. I managed to pull out the keycard and opened the door. He hauled me to my bed and I fell asleep before I even hit the pillow.
Lance stood there amazed at how quickly I fell asleep. He lifted my arm and let it drop to the mattress. 'He's really dead tired,' he giggled to himself. Lance just stood there, looking at my sleeping body, not knowing why. He sat next to me on the edge of the bed and started to breathe slowly. Lance unknowingly and instinctively leaned forward. He closed his eyes and slowly, ever so slowly, leaned over trying to make his lips contact mine. He almost connected before his eyes flew wide open and jumped off the bed. 'My God,' he whispered in a panicked voice, 'What am I doing?' He quickly opened the door and bolted out of the room, trying to keep the noise to a minimum.
Lance ran to the elevator and pushed the elevator button. 'I can't believe what just almost happened,' thinking to himself, 'Come on, stupid elevator,' as the elevator doors slowly opened and Lance dashed in. The idea of him kissing me totally did not register in his brain. Once downstairs, he ran through the lobby and into his car. He started it up and sped off to the studio. He had to make sure no one should ever know what happened between him and me. During the drive to the studio, the only thing Lance could think of was that fateful event.
Chris was eating breakfast and watching the news in the living room as JC and Justin hobbled down the stairs.
"Morning guys," Chris said still eating cereal and watching TV.
"Morning Chris," JC replied.
Justin and JC grabbed a bowl, filled it with cereal, and poured milk into it.
"What's the agenda for today?" JC asked as he took a spoonful of cereal into his mouth.
"Same old, same old," Chris replied, "We're supposed to be at the studio by 9:30."
"What about Joey and Lance?"
"They'll meet us at there."
"OK."
The three of them sat around the table looking at the morning news. Justin took the remote off the coffee table and turned up the volume a little.
"...Yesterday afternoon, a mob formed in the food court area at the mega mall," a news reporter stated, "...Joey Fatone and Christopher Kirkpatrick, both members of the sensational pop group N'Sync, were surrounded my a mob of fans. Witnesses say that a young Asian man threw them out of the crowd and held the everyone back as they escaped. Luckily, no one got hurt..."
JC and Justin's eyes snapped open to attention, "You didn't tell us this!" JC said looking at Chris.
"I didn't want to scare you guys," Chris replied looking in his bowl playing with the cereal, "Besides, everything turned out OK."
"OK Chris..." Justin demanded, "...spill it. Tell us everything that happened at the mall."
Chris sighed, "You see, we were in the mall, Joey and I were eating. Then all of a sudden a bunch of girls started running towards our table. We tried to leave, but people started to get in our way. The next thing we knew, we were being pulled by girls behind us and more people crowed around the table," JC and Justin just watched him with awe.
"There was a large crowd around us and we couldn't see a thing. Then I felt someone grip my arm really hard and dragged me through the mess. The next thing I remember, Joey and I were out of the crowd and Mano was yelling at us to run away while he held the people back..." Chris stopped and a small tear rolled down his face.
JC and Justin was surprised to see the tear, "What happened afterwards?" Justin said softly.
"You see," Chris sniffled, "We jumped into the jeep and drove off cause there were too many people chasing us, leaving Mano behind. Both of us felt miserable doing what we did..." trailing off.
"You had to do what you had to do," JC trying to justify Chris' action.
"I just wish people would leave us alone," his started to pout again, "I wish we weren't famous."
"I know you don't mean that," JC put his arm around Chris' shoulder, "You like entertaining people and I know it's hard being yourself being bombarded by fans," trying to comfort him.
"Yeah, I know," Chris sighed, "It's just that, I haven't been able to be myself in a long time."
"I know what you mean, bro," Justin spoke up, "I know what you mean."
They sat in silence eating the remainder of their cereal. When they were finished, they went back to their rooms and changed their clothes for the day. It was about 8:30 before they came back down to the living room and reached the front door.
"We'd better get a move on," JC said, "I don't want Lance to be all up in my ass if we're late," Chris and Justin laughed at the comment.
All of them hopped in Justin's car and drove off to the studio. Each of them thinking about what I had done and how relaxed they were around me. On occasion, one of them would start a small conversation, but it didn't last for more than a few minutes or so. They were all distraught at the notion of me leaving in two days.
Once they reached the studio, the trio headed for the conference room. Inside, they saw Lance and Joey talking to their manager. The manager looked up at them and stopped his conversation with Lance and Joey.
"Good you're all here on time," the manager said, "This is quite a feat."
"What? You think we can never be on time?" Chris joked.
"No, it's just that I'm surprised to see the day that you guys are early and on time," replying to his remark. Everyone laughed.
"What's the plan for today?" JC asked.
"Today's schedule is going to be a little bit different than what you're used to," the manager started.
"What do you mean?" Justin asked.
"As I was saying," the manager continued, "It's going to be a bit different today," turning to Chris, "Chris, you don't have to start until noon today. You can do whatever you want till then."
"All right!" Chris exaggerated.
"Joey, you stay with us and then get a 2 hour break starting at 12 before coming back."
"Sounds good to me," Joey replied.
"Lance and Justin, you guys stay here all day."
"Awe man," they both complained.
Finally, the manager turned to JC, "You get to leave at 2:30."
JC made a small smile knowing that he could leave early and make plans for later in the day, "What's with the schedule?"
"We had to stagger the schedule today because of various conflicts ranging from the choreographers not getting here till later to the overbooking of the sound studio," replying in a factly sort of way.
"Ah, I see," JC getting the idea.
"Well then..." Chris started, "...Since I won't start in a couple of hours..." looking at Justin, "...Could I borrow your car for a while?"
"I don't know," sounding hesitant.
"Come on," Chris begged, "You know I'm a better driver than you are."
Justin paused for a moment, "If you scratch my wheels..." he started to reach in his pocket.
"Yes!" exaggerating his word, "You won't even know it was gone."
"THAT'S what I'm afraid of," Justin giving Chris his keys.
When Chris had the keys, he immediately bolted out of the set.
"He sure is in a hurry to go somewhere," the manager commented.
"I wonder where to?" Joey asked, as Justin and JC knew exactly where he was headed.
It was not more than a couple hours since I dropped dead on the bed, when a knocking sound awoke me from my slumber. I turned to look at the clock and it read 10:30, I sighed in disappointment.
"Huh...What...Who is it?" I yelled from my bed.
"Hey Mano, it's me Chris," answering my question.
I forced myself up off the bed and opened the door, "Hi Chris," I yawned at him, "What's up?"
He looked at me strangely, "You look like you've been run over by a truck."
"More like being a barricade, holding back a couple hundred screaming fans," I tried to joke thinking of the event that happened in the mall, but Chris just looked at the ground, "Oh, I'm sorry," realizing at what I said, "I didn't think you still felt that way."
"I should be the one who's sorry," Chris said sheepishly.
"Oh, don't be," trying to sound annoyed, "What's done is done and it does no good to remember the bad things that happened."
"I'll try," sounding a hint of confidence in his voice.
"That's the way," I started to yawn again, "What brings you here?" finally asking.
"Well..." he looked up, "I was hoping we could get some breakfast before I go to work."
Now this sounded familiar, "Sorry, but I'm kinda full after breakfast."
"Oh," sounding disappointed, "I didn't know you ate breakfast already."
"Yeah I ate breakfast..." stopping to think that Lance would have told him about my meal already, "...here at the hotel."
"Ordered room service eh?" Chris said not knowing a thing, "We do that all the time. Isn't it convenient?"
"Yeah, convenient," I echoed now knowing that Lance didn't tell him anything.
"Since you ate already," sounding a bit sad, "I should let you get some rest," as he started to turn around.
"I'm pretty rested now," grabbing his shoulder and turned him back to me, "All I need is some relaxation in the hot tub downstairs," smiling at him.
"That'll be great!" he replied with enthusiasm.
"Come inside and let me get my trunks," motioning Chris in.
It didn't take me long to get my swim trunk out of suitcase when Chris started to say something.
"Uh...Mano?" Chris asked nervously.
"Yeah," answering cautiously.
"I didn't bring my trunks with me," he said sheepishly, "Could I borrow yours for a while?" starting to blush.
"Oh sure. No problem," I told him as I got another pair of trunks from my suitcase, "Here," I threw the pair to him.
"Thanks," he smiled.
We headed down the elevator and talked about nothing in particular. The atmosphere felt exactly the same as when Lance was walking with me to go get breakfast. This time, there was something more intense in the air. I had to be very careful what I did with Chris. I didn't want to give him any ideas, fearing major retribution from him if something went wrong. I knew cause he would get awfully crazy when he got pissed or annoyed.
We reached the first floor and headed for the hot tubs in the swimming area. I wasn't surprised to find that we were the only a couple of people here in the area. Considering that it was 10 in the morning, everyone is probably still asleep. Both us went to the locker rooms and started to change our clothes. Both of our lockers were next to each other and I started to undress.
I noticed in the corner of my eye, Chris was deliberately taking his time. He was watching my every movement. I was surprised that he didn't catch on that I knew what he was doing. I tried to play calm and changed clothes as naturally as I could. I was surprised at myself for not being turned on when a someone was actually checking me out. It was probably because I was never interested in doing the one night stand sort of thing. I've always wanted to get to know someone first before jumping into something which I would regret later in life.
Once I was done changing, I turned to look at Chris. I was surprised that he had already finished before I did. I was impressed at what I saw. Chris stood there with quite a good looking package. He had a nicely defined chest area, and pretty firm looking abs. He also had a very thin layer of body hair which covered his chest and tapered off to his midsection.
"Ready to go?" I asked trying not sound so impressed at what I saw.
"Sure, lets go," scanning me over quite quickly.
We walked to the hot tub and turned on the water as well as the jets. I turned the dial to about 1/2 intensity and both of us stepped in. I was on one side of the tub while he sat across from me. It was heavenly sitting in the tub feeling the water massage my back and legs.
"This feels so good," I commented and Chris nodded his head in agreement, "I really need this after all the stuff I been doing the past couple of days."
"What do you mean?" Chris looked puzzled.
"You know," I stared at him, "It's pretty hard to keep up with you guys."
"Maybe you're not used to socializing," he said jokingly.
I took it pretty seriously and just looked at the bubbles, "Yeah...I guess," I muttered out.
Chris' eyes grew big, "I...I'm sorry. I didn't mean it that way," he said softly as he leaned towards me.
"No it's ok," I looked back at him, "You're right, I don't normally socialize back home. I'm usually by myself," I could see a small tear start to form in his saddened eyes. "Don't worry about a thing, I can take care of myself," laughing a little.
Chris looked down, "I guess you're right," he then cracked a small smile, "It's just that...just that I hate saying stupid things on impulse. It hurts me when I see you upset from the comments that I make," looking at me.
"Well..." feeling really awkward, "...I should learn to loosen up a bit. Like I said," starting to smile, "I should just forget about things which happen and get on with the present."
"Not only that," he continued with his thought and sounding very serious, "You see I..." trying to collect himself to speak.
"You what..." trying to lead him on.
"...I..I like you...really like you," finally finishing his thought looking at the water.
I swore that my jaw dropped through the tub. I was shocked at what he said. Never would I have ever thought that he would be the one that would say it. I imagined I would be the one who would break it to him...eventually.
"Yeah," Chris started back up again noticing that there was an awkward silence, "I do like you a lot. You're like a brother that I wished I had,"
I drew back my jaw up and collected my thoughts, "Really?" I tried to ask sincerely.
"You're so fun to be around with. I think you're the first person, other than the rest of the guys, who wouldn't get mad at me for doing really stupid things."
"Well," I calmed down a bit from his confession, "It just takes time to get to know someone. The reason why I don't get mad at you or anything is that it's pretty hard to get angry at a brother for very long," smiling at what I just said.
Chris looked back up at me with joy in his eyes, "You mean it?"
"No, I don't," saying playfully, "Why else should I say it if I didn't mean it?"
"I guess you're right," Chris laughing.
"Right now, I just want to sit here and relax," I said leaning back against the edge of the tub.
"Yeah me too," he agreed.
"By the way," I started back up again, "When do you have to go back to work?"
"Noon," he lazily replied.
"Well, it's almost 11:30," I said to him looking at the wall clock in the back of the room.
"Holy shit!" Chris jumped, leaping out of the pool, "I'm gonna get it this time!"
"I see you're not the one who keeps appointments," I laughed.
"Oh shut up," he laughed with me, "Sorry I gotta go."
"Would you quit saying 'sorry' already and get the hell out of here," trying to sound upset.
"OK..OK, I'm going," playing along, "Sheesh...you sound like a grumpy old man."
"You don't know how grumpy I can be you whipper-snapper," trying to imitate one.
Both of us laughed at the lame joke and headed for the locker. This time, I felt a litter easier with him as we changed back to our normal clothes once I knew why he was acting the way he was. We chatted in the locker room about some of his embarrassing moments. We headed out of the pool area and walked to the lobby. I escorted Chris back to the car. I noticed it was Justin's and just accepted it. Once he was in the car, he told me that he wanted to hang out with me some time. I told him that it was no problem, but to call first so I can get ready and he agreed.
I watched Chris pull out of the parking space and waved him good- bye. He drove off quickly down the road and was out of sight in no time flat. I stretched out a little and let my face soak up some sun before heading back to my room. Once satisfied, I went back through the lobby and up to my room. I sat on the chair giggling to myself, 'Gee, am I egotistical?' I thought. 'To think it was just brotherly love...or is it?' I shook my head, trying to remove the doubt in my mind.
Staring at the table, I noticed my sketch book. I flipped to a blank page and I decided to draw some more of the sites I had seen with Lance. First, I started on the mountain tops which I saw when I first arrived at the park. Then I started to draw the corral and tried to fit in as many horses as I could. Finally, I drew a scene of the lush forest that Lance and I trotted through. 'A nature theme,' I thought to myself, 'But who would want to dress up like Tarzan or Jane for the prom,' giggling at the thought.
After drawing, my stomach started to rumble a little. I was surprised that I was already hungry after eating breakfast so early. Shrugging my shoulders, I left the room and headed back down the lobby. There was a quaint snack shop off to the side inside the lobby where people could get some croissants, coffee and the like. I went inside and stood in front of the menu, which was hanging on the wall above the counter. There were lots of different coffee types to choose from as well as baked goods. 'It's not as good as Starbucks,' I thought to myself. As I was about to place my order I jumped at the feeling of someone tapping me on the shoulder.
I slowly turned around to see who it was, "Joey?" looking dumbfounded.
"Hi Mano," smiling a little, "I'm sorry about yesterday."
I looked at him quizzically, "Sorry for what?"
"Don't you remember?" asking astonished, "We were going to chill together, but I had things to do which I wasn't able to cancel," explaining sheepishly.
"You don't have to apologize," I said smiling, "I had a good time with Lance?"
"With...Lance?" cocking an eyebrow.
It seemed that Lance didn't tell anyone about our little "adventure" and now I was backed into a corner, "Yeah...Lance came by yesterday and said that since you couldn't make it, he would be your replacement," trying to sound if it was no big deal.
"Oh," was the only thing he could say.
"So, what's up?" changing the subject rather quickly.
Joey snapped to attention, "I was on my break and thought that you and I would get some lunch or a light snack," sounding hungry.
"I was going to get a bite to eat," pointing at the menu, "But someone just happen to interrupt me before I got a chance to order anything," saying sarcastically.
"Well sorry for stopping your train of thought," replying equally sarcastic and both of us started laughing.
Joey browsed the menu just as I had and ordered some lemon shortcake and a cup of mocha coffee. I ordered a beagle and a cup of hot chocolate and we sat down at a table in the corner of the cafe. We both sat down and put our food on the table. I began to sip my chocolate while Joey hungrily forked down his shortcake and taking gulps of his mocha.
"You know," I said pointing at his drink, "If you drink that stuff, you'll become addicted before you know it."
He stopped eating and looked at me for a second and then rolled his eyes and resumed his consumption of lunch.
"Ok," I sipped by chocolate again, "Don't say I didn't warn you," I then laughed.
After Joey slowed down a bit in his quest to feed himself, we started chatting about the local life which happened in the area. He talked about the clubs which he had visited and all of the other clubs in different cities where he and the guys had visited to.
"I've never been in a club," I mentioned.
"You, have never been in a club?" repeating what I had just said slowly.
"Yeah, sad isn't it?" making fun of myself and Joey faking a laugh.
"You know," Joey started and I looked at him, "I should take you clubbing one of these days."
"Well...umm," I said looking down at my mug, "I don't think I'll be able to go clubbing with you anytime soon."
"What do you mean?" looking puzzled.
"I'm leaving tomorrow morning at 10," I just kept staring at the mug.
"You're leaving that soon?" changing his sweet smile to a frown.
"Yeah...." not being able to say anything else.
A small silence drifted between us when Joey began to speak.
"I guess I'll have to hurry up on my offer," he said with a huge grin.
"What do you mean?"
Joey stood up, grabbed my arm and pulled me right out of the cafe.
"Hey!" I said angrily, "I wasn't finished with my drink!"
"I'll buy you another one," laughing as he pulled me to his car.
He let go once we were outside of the hotel and I followed him to the parking area.
"Where are we going?" I asked as we walked to the car.
"You'll see," he said as I sighed.
We reached his car and both of us got in.
"You're gonna love this," he said starting the car up.
"Uh oh, not again," I said worriedly and he started to laugh.
Joey drove out of the hotel parking and headed straight to the city. He turned at many different intersections until he stopped in front of what looked like a large abandoned building. He parked at the back of the place and I was surprised that there were many of cars there, thinking that this place is abandoned. We hopped out and Joey lead the way. We walked around the corner of the building where a single set of double doors were visible. I was a little apprehensive of what was going on, but I trusted him.
When he opened the door, a blast of sound almost knocked me over. Loud, thumping dance music was beating inside the building. It was as if the building itself had a heartbeat. Joey smiled.
"Aren't...glad...came!" was all I could hear from Joey as the music drowned him out.
I had a good idea what he had said, "YEAH!" I yelled back and he grew a wide smile.
Both of us got onto the dance floor and started to mingle with the crowd. I was having a great time. Though the place was very hot and humid, it didn't bother me one bit. There were people everywhere I looked; people on the floor, people on the catwalk, people on the stage, everywhere I turned there were people dancing to the beat of the music. Not only was there techno thumping away, but there were lasers streaming from the projectors onto the wall, and multi-colored spotlights shining everywhere. I dance with a bunch of people. They didn't care who I was as long as I was dancing. Joey was doing the same thing I was. He was dancing with a bunch of girls having a real good time. I Never knew that clubbing was so much fun. I should really do this more often.
After a 30 or so minutes of hard dancing, Joey squeezed through a bunch of people and was dancing next to me.
"Mano...talk...you..." he yelled at me, "...something important..." the music drowning out his words.
I had the gist of what he was try to say, "Sure!" I yell at him.
He nodded his head in compliance and both of us headed back towards the doors. We exited the club, both of us tired and sweaty. He looked at his watch and knew that he had to go back to the studio. Joey was thinking that he had to say it now or never.
"Yo, Mano?" he asked me as we headed for his car.
"What's up?" I looked at his face, "You're not going to be late, are you?"
"No, no. It's not that," laughing a little, "It's about...well...it's about you leaving tomorrow."
"What, did a terrorist take the airport hostage or something?" I joked.
He laughed a little, then stopped to look at me dead in the eyes, "It's kinda embarrassing...but I'll say it anyway," scratching his head.
"What's there to be embarrassed about?" not know what Joey was going to say next, "I'm your friend and you can talk to me. What's on your mind?"
Joey took a deep breath, "I don't want you to go back to San Francisco tomorrow," I looked at him funny and he resumed his thought, "I want you to stay....to stay here with me...in Orlando."
"What!?!" I freaked out, "I can't do that!"
"Why not?" asking as if what he just said was normal, "Why can't you stay here?"
"It...it's not simple," I calmed down a little bit, "I have to set up the prom in May, let alone finishing high school, and if I did stay, where am I supposed to live?" trying to make it sound that it was crazy for me to be here.
He thought for a moment, "Why don't you call your friend and ask to take over your place? Since, you're pretty smart, go ahead and get a GED from one of the schools around here, so that way you can finish school way early," trying to convince me he had a good idea.
"OK, what about living here?" cocking my eyebrow at him fully annoyed now, "My parents will not buy a house here, ya know."
"That's no problem," he said smiling, "You can live...with me!" patting himself on the back knowing that he answered everything.
Now I really needed to get out of this fix, "Look..." I started to speak in my most reasonable tone, "...this is a lot to think about. I won't be leaving until tomorrow. Why don't I just give you my answer then?"
"It doesn't work that way," he sternly said.
"Why not!" I demanded.
"If you wait until tomorrow..." Joey looked at the ground, "...you would have boarded that plane without thinking about my offer," saying softly almost apologetically.
This was another shocking development in my already screwed up life. I closed my eyes and thought hard and deep for the answer, "I'm so sorry Joey...But I can't stay," knowing that I have hurt his feelings as well as damaged our relationship.
I waited for a moment and heard only silence as Joey still looked at the ground. I felt horrible. I looked at floor as well and I gasped. I saw little wet circles on the concrete between Joey shoes. I quickly looked up and noticed small tears falling from his eyes.
"I'm sorry," my voice was cracked, "I'm so sorry..."
I took a step back, turned around and ran away from him. Joey snapped his head up when he heard footsteps and saw me running away.
"Wait!" he yelled, "Mano don't go! ...Don't leave me..." he trailed off and I didn't hear his last words.
Chapter 6: Confusion
I ran on the sidewalk dodging people and passing up store, after store which lined the streets. After I ran several blocks, I started to slow down to a jog and then finally, I stopped running. I breathed heavily, but still continued to walk, not caring where I was heading. I couldn't look up, just stared at ground. I was disgusted with myself for running away like that. How the hell could I help it? I didn't know what to? Hell, what was I supposed to do in a situation like that. Never had I encountered anything remotely like it.
My legs were getting sore from the short run and I decided to flag down a cab. I raised my arm out and managed to catch one. The cab pulled over to the curb where I was standing. I went to the rear passenger seat and plopped on the seat.
"Where to buddy?" the driver asked.
"I don't care..." I replied softly.
"You have to be a little bit more specific," the guy scratching his head trying to make sense of me.
"Fine...Take me to the beach."
"The beach it is," as he shifted the gears and the cab was in motion.
I sat there in the cab just staring at the carpeted floor, feeling numb from what I had done.
The driver looked at this rear view mirror and noticed me sulking, "Bad day huh?" asking me.
I didn't reply.
"Well you know," trying to start a conversation with me, "Bad days are like dates...some of them are better than others, but in the end you break up and forget about it," laughing at his own comment.
I thought it was stupid.
"Tough crowd today," sighing.
I rode in the cab for about twenty minutes, still not paying attention to where I was, until I was already at the beach.
"Hey guy," the driver finally said something, "We're here. That'll be 35 bucks."
I gave him the money and left the cab. I walked towards the sand and looked out. This time around, there weren't as many people as when Lance and I were here. All I could hear was just the waves crashing along the shore. I took a deep breath and smelled the salty air. I resumed looking at the ground and slowly followed the shoreline.
"What did I do?" asking myself, "Joey didn't do anything to me and I come along and had to fuck things up," tears starting to form in my eyes.
I walked along the beach for a while and sat down on the sand. I felt the sand being different here. It was coarse and grainy, not smooth and fine like the last time I went here. I just sat there, with my arms wrapped around my knees slowly rocking back and forth. I just couldn't hold the guilt any longer, I started to cry. At first it was just a few tears that came out, but once it started I couldn't stop. As I softly cried and rocked myself back and forth, I could hear some people whisper behind me.
It didn't matter...nothing mattered anymore. I looked towards the ocean with my blurred eyes and stared at the water. I never did learn how to swim and looking over the water always calmed me down. It was probably knowing the fact that I could solve all my answers by jumping in the water and drown which made me calm.
I just stared at the water, noticing the crests of the waves break as they contacted the shore. I slowly stopped crying and sat there in silence. Slowly, I got up from the fetal position and walked towards the water.
A feeling overwhelmed me when I headed towards the water. It was as if the ocean was calling out to me. The sound of the waves was transformed into a Siren's song, calling to me. I walked all the way to the of water line and stopped for a moment. The pulling force of the water was so strong that I started walking again.
My shoes made contact the water and it was starting to get soaked. I continued forth. I took another step. My right foot was completely submerged under the water and I took another step. Each step I took the water rose higher and higher along my legs. I could feel the force of the waves pushing me back to the shore, but I resisted the pounding serf and trudged through the water.
When the water was about halfway up my thigh, an outline of a face flashed through my head. "You're running away again," the face spoke to me in a deep voice. "I can't help it," I spoke towards the vast ocean, "What am I supposed to do?" I started to sob again. "The more you run," the mysterious face spoke, "The harder it is to face reality and in the end...you will be alone..." the image faded in my mind.
I dropped to my knees and began to cry even harder. The cold, salty water pounded against my chest, but I still kept crying. No matter what I did, I couldn't get up or do anything else. I must have been in that water for half an hour until I realized that my legs were numb. I managed to stop crying and crawled back onto the dry sand. It was a very difficult because my limbs were numb from the cold water. Once I was able to drag my now shivering body ashore, I collapsed on the warm, dry sand.
I rolled on my back and closed my eyes. The sun was soft and warm and I felt a little bit better than before. I could hear the sea gulls gawking over my head as well as people chattering behind me on the sidewalk. There were also the sounds of kids playing on the beach as well as dogs barking at their masters. 'I mustn't run away,' I thought to myself, soaking up the sun, 'I should pick up the shattered pieces of my life and start over.'
I slowly opened my eyes. Everything was blurry and it took a few moments for everything to be in focus. My arms and legs weren't numb anymore and I decided to get up. I slowly sat up and then, used my arms for support, stood up. I became lightheaded, but regained my balance after a few seconds. I trudged towards the sidewalk and followed the pavement. My feet sloshed back and forth in my shoes as I walked slowly. My shorts were completely drenched as well as most of my shirt, the salt water made everything I was wearing heavier.
I finally managed to look up ahead of me and saw a few people taking an afternoon stroll. It was only 1:00 and all the stores were fully opened. I decided I would check out a little music store. It was quaint, nothing flashy or anything, just your basic store with racks of CDs everywhere. I could hear some radio music from the little speakers that were perched on the counter.
"...If you need a friend...Don't look to a stranger..." the radio blared as it filled the store with dance music, "...You know in the end...I'll always be there..."
"This sounds familiar," I thought to myself.
"...And when you're in doubt...And when you're in danger...Take a look all around...and I'll be there..." the techno beat thumped on, "...I'm sorry, but I'm just thinking of the right words to say...I know they don't sound the way they I planned them to be...But if you wait around a while waiting for me...I promise you...I promise you..."
"Ironic isn't?" I laughed to myself.
I browsed through some dance and techno music, but didn't like any of them. I thought of buying some New Order or OMD, but I could get them back home. Then the song ended and I walked over to some indie stuff. There were only a few CDs there, I guess there aren't that many local bands in the area. Then a different music filtered through the speakers. It sounded very familiar...I don't know why.
"You're all I ever wanted..." the music started, "You're all I ever needed, yeah...so tell me what to do now...Cause I want you back..." then the beat kicked in.
"These guys are pretty good," I commented, "Haven't heard them before. I'll get their CD later.
I stood in the store for a while longer listen to the music. I got tired of listening and walked out the door.
"...That was Justin, Chris, Joey, Lance, and JC...better known as N' Sync," the radio announcer said, but I was already a couple stores away to hear it.
Justin, JC and Chris were in the studio singing into the mics in one of the sound studios while Lance was in a different room with the choreographer to finish learning the steps for their next tour. The manager pushed a button to stop the music.
"OK," he said, "JC and Justin, go ahead and take a break. Be back in an hour. Chris, tell Lance that he could go on break and then you go work with the choreographer for the new steps."
JC and Justin stuck their thumbs up towards the manager while Chris stuck out his tongue. The guys laughed.
Justin and JC went off to the cafeteria. Along the way, they were surprised to see Joey in the building.
"Hey Joey what's up?" Justin started.
"We thought you were on break," JC continued.
He looked at them for a moment, "Yeah...well, I wasn't that hungry after all," looking quite depressed. He walked off along one of the corridors and entered a room.
JC and Justin looked at each other.
"What the happened to him?" Justin asked JC with concern.
"I have no idea," JC replied equally worried, "But he looks so out of it."
"I hope he gets better soon."
"I hope so to."
They resumed to the cafeteria and when they got in, they both grabbed a tray and began to pile food on it. JC took some chicken wings, some salad and a cup of mint chocolate ice cream, while Justin took some finger sandwiches, bottled water, and a brownie. They scanned the area and noticed that Lance was sitting the corner of the room with his chin on the table.
"What is going on here?" JC asked Justin in disbelief.
"You got me," the only thing he could say.
They apprehensively walked towards Lance sat across from him. Lance just looked at them with his chin still on the table. Justin and JC began eating their lunch. JC, being annoyed at the sight of anyone looking so sad, decided to speak.
"Yo Lance. What's bothering you, bro?"
"Nothing," he pouted.
"Right..." JC replying with a suspicious tone, "...And I'm the King of England," in sarcasm.
Lance didn't say a word.
"I know when something's bothering you. I want to help you out if I can?" JC asking.
"Look, nothing's wrong!" Lance snapped his head up yelling at JC. JC and Justin jumped in their seat at Lance's tone. "Nothing's wrong," Lance resumed in a calm sad voice, "I'm tired, I have a lot of things on my mind and I need to straighten them out."
"O..OK" JC said nervously, "If you need us we'll be here."
"OK," Lance got up and walked out of the cafeteria.
"There is definitely wrong around this place," Justin was being worried after that little outburst from Lance.
"I know," JC agreeing, "What happened to everyone?"
"I don't know about you, but I sorta have a hunch," Justin said.
"Like what."
"What is the only thing in common with Lance and Joey?"
"Besides being the group, I really don't know," JC said and thought for a moment. His eyes opened wide, "You don't think?"
"Yeah, I think Mano had something to do with them," Justin admitted.
"What could he have possibly done?" JC asked in disbelief.
"I don't know, but what if they did something to him?"
"What do you mean? Lance and Joey are very sweet guys. I really don't think that they can do that sort of thing. You heard what Chris said about leaving him behind. They both felt miserable."
"I know, I know. But I have this strange feeling that they did something really stupid."
They ended the conversation and continued with lunch. JC decided to go outside and take a walk along the grass. Justin nodded his head and told him that he will just chill in the TV room. JC got up, left the cafeteria and headed outside.
I walked for several blocks passing up store after store thinking of nothing. My mind was not in this dimension, I was somewhere else. I could hear people talking, walking, running all around me, but I never once looked up. As I continued to walk, I heard more and more cars driving past me. I finally stopped looking at the ground and raised my head up to look forward. I was kinda surprised to see that I had reached the edge of the city.
All I could see were many small office buildings and lots of grass separating one building to another. In the distance, the large skyscrapers loomed over the smaller buildings. I just kept walking, not knowing where I would be heading. My legs and feet were getting sore from all that trekking and I decided to stop at a nearby bench.
The bench was located in front of a fountain near a fairly long 2 story building covered in black glass. I sat down and stared at the fountain. I saw the columns of water of varying heights bobbing up and down. The sound of birds chirping while taking a little in the fountain looked so innocent. My eyes were beginning to fill up with tears again. I put my hands over my face and started to cry softly. I still couldn't get over the thought of what I did to Joey. I knew he meant well, but I didn't mean to do that to him. I heard someone walk by me.
"Mano?" JC asked when he was right behind me.
I quickly tried to stop crying and wiped my eyes with my arm. I turned around to face him, "Hi JC. How's it going?"
"Wha...what happened to you?" JC quickly came around and sat next to me, "Are you OK? Are you hurt?" frantically asking me.
"Yeah...I'm OK," I tried to sound like I was.
"Bullshit!," now sounding really worried, "Something happened to you...You can tell me, I'm your friend remember?" he said with a small smile.
"Well..." I looked up and saw his concerned eyes. I was lost in those soft blue-hued eyes of his. They made me feel safe. "...what would you do if you had to say something to someone, but you couldn't hurt their feelings, but you had to say it anyway?" I rambled at him.
He stared at me for a minute trying to figure out what I had just said, "I...um...I really don't know," fumbling for the words.
I sighed and looked down at the bench, "That's OK."
"No it's not," putting his hand on my shoulder, "I really do want to help you out, but I can't give you an answer unless you tell me what happened."
"I can't right now...I can't handle it at the moment."
JC pulled me close and gave me a deep hug. He then slowly rocked me back and forth in his arms, "Don't worry. If you need some time to work things out just remember that I will always be here to help you out," he whispered in my ear.
I felt so warm and safe in his arms. Something which I hadn't felt in a very long time, "Don't worry, I will..." trailing off.
He broke the hug and noticed that he was wet. I looked at his soiled shirt.
"Sorry about your shirt," I said, "I was at the beach."
"Swimming in your clothes?" JC looking at me funny.
"Well..." I started to blush a little.
"It's no big deal," JC said in a happier tone, "I have some extra stuff lying around here somewhere."
I looked up at him, "You bring clothes to work?"
"Yeah, sometimes I spend the night here to finish stuff."
"Wow, you're real dedicated."
"I love what I do," he smiled.
"I better get going and change my clothes before I get sick or something."
"Besides," JC cutting me off, "You smell like a fish," we both laughed, "Wait right here and I'll get you a ride home."
"Are you sure?" I asked him, "I can get a cab back."
"Don't worry about a thing. The ride is free so just relax."
"Oh, OK."
"Oh by the way," as JC got up, "Are you doing anything later this afternoon?"
I thought for a moment, "No...I don't think so."
"Would you mind a walk in the park or a visit to the zoo?"
"No, I wouldn't mind. Actually, I would like that. I need some rest and relaxation," I smiled.
"Cool," he smiled back, "I'll be back with the ride."
JC walked into to the long building and disappeared. I waited for about a couple of minutes when JC walked back out and headed towards me.
"Ready to go?"
"Yup."
JC lead me to the curb and a black limo pulled over. My eyes bugged out.
"This is the ride?" I asked in astonishment.
"Why? You don't want to ride in one?" he asked.
"No..no. I wasn't expecting it, that all," JC smiled widely.
"I'll see you at your hotel at around 3:30, OK?" he asked me.
"Sure no problem. I should be ready by then."
"OK, see you later."
I opened the limo door and I reluctantly stepped in. I turned around and saw JC mouthing to me 'Go on' and smiled. I turned back and crawled into the limo. When I closed the door, the limo slowly started accelerating and I was on my way to the hotel. The limo was really nice. So spacious and clean, I was really excited to be in one. There was a micro fridge in one corner and some alcohol in another. 'Gee, you don't have to go to bar,' I thought to myself. All the way to the hotel, I just stared at the tinted windows looking at all the people who were staring at the limo trying to figure out who's in it.
JC walked back in the studio and Justin caught up with him.
"Where'd you go?" he asked, "They're waiting for you."
"Sorry about that," JC replied, "I stopped and chatted for a while and I forgot the time."
Justin cocked an eyebrow, "Chatted with whom?"
"Mano."
"What!?! Mano was here!" he said in disbelief.
"Shhhh, keep it down," trying to stay calm, "I don't want anyone to know."
"OK OK," regaining his composure, "How's he?"
"Mano's not doing too well."
"How so," looking at JC curiously.
"He looked as bad, if not worse, than Lance or Joey," JC sighed.
"I told you something's up," crossing his arms, "But I think we should wait until later when everything is done."
"Good idea. Maybe then Mano would be well enough to tell me what's going on."
JC and Justin walked along the corridors heading towards the recording booth. 'Why tell only to you?' Justin thought as they entered the room.
I was both physically and emotionally drained from my ordeal. I lay on my bed staring up at the ceiling, still wearing the sea soaked clothes. I hope, no, I pray that JC won't pull any stunts on me like everyone else did. But I didn't think that he will. Somehow, I felt very safe and warm in his arms. Something which I have desperately missed.
I got off the bed and looked for some clothes to wear for later that day. I found some faded, black jeans and a grey Utility shirt. I headed to the bathroom and took a relaxing shower. I stepped out of the shower and got dressed. Looking at the digital clock on the table, it read 3:25. I sat down on the chair and looked out the window, patiently waiting for JC.
After daydreaming about the prom, the door knocked. I snapped out of it, walked towards the door and opened it. As expected it was JC. He was wearing a blue turtle neck shirt, his leather bomber jacket and blue baggy jeans. He looked so comfortable.
"Ready to go?" he asked.
"Sure."
"There's a zoo near here at the state park. So if you need to leave right away, I can take you back in to time flat."
"I won't be leaving anytime soon," I looked at JC, "As long as you're around," he smiled.
We started doing a little small talk about the zoo and stuff, but nothing really earth shattering like earlier. We talked all the way to his jeep and talked some more along the drive to the zoo. I felt so much at ease with him that I felt like I've known him all my life. JC would crack a joke once in a while, but they were so corny or awful that I just had to laugh.
"Ever been to the zoo?" he asked as he pulled over.
"I've been to the San Francisco zoo," I replied, "But that was a long time ago."
"This one is a little different from the one you're used to."
"How so?"
"In this zoo, there are no bars caging the animals. Instead they are scattered throughout the place."
"Won't people get mauled by marauding animals?" I asked in wonder.
"Nah. The zookeepers have all the dangerous animals on a leash and you can see them as the keepers take them for a walk along the trails."
"Wow, that's really cool."
"Isn't it neat!"
We paid for our tickets and walked in. "This place looks so natural," talking outloud looking at all the different trees, shrubs, and bushes.
"That's why I like it here," JC commented, "Where do you want to go first?"
"I don't really care. I just want to explore."
"Not a problem," JC looking back at me.
We took a trail and followed the long wooded rails which lined it.
"Hey look at that!" I said while pointing at a gazelle.
"Never seen that before," looking at where I was pointing, "They must have added some new stuff while I was gone."
JC scanned around a bit while we continued our slow hike. JC tugged at my shirt a little, "Over there," he whispered pointing at some jungle foliage.
I turned and looked at the greenery, "Wow," I whispered at JC, "A jaguar," he nodded back.
I was in awe at what I saw throughout the zoo. JC was equally enjoying himself, feeling that he hadn't been there in a long time. We visited lots of places in the zoo. There was a desert area with camels and little geckos. There was also a savanna where lions were wandering around with the zookeepers next to them. Time was passing very quickly and by the time I looked at my watch it was almost 7.
The sun hadn't set yet, but I could see that the sky was turning a soft orange color. JC and I walked over to the hilly segment of the zoo and I put my hand on the wooden railings. I stared at the small rolling hills and followed some rabbits hopping across the field. A small gust of wind blew and I shivered a little bit. I had forgotten to bring a jacket or something heavier cause I wasn't expecting to stay out so late.
Then something happened which surprised me a little. JC wrapped his arms around my waist and rested his head on my shoulder as he also looked at the hills. I started to panic cause I didn't know what was going on. As time wore on, I began to relax a little and just felt the warmth of his body against mine. The feeling of warmth, comfort and security filled my body. I let him hold me for a moment longer before speaking.
"I don't think this is a good idea JC," I started, "People might think we're gay."
JC popped his eyes wide open and quickly released his hold on me, "I...I...I'm really sorry about that," stuttering out, looking at the ground, and blushing.
"It's OK," I started laughing, "Just as long as I don't get any dirty looks from anyone."
"I'm really sorry," he apologized. Then he looked at me, "Usually, it's Justin is the one who always goes out without getting anything to wear," he explained, "When it gets cold he starts to shiver and I usually do that to keep him warm."
"You love Justin...don't you?" asking him.
"Yeah..." JC starting to smile, "He's like a brother to me and I do love him."
"I didn't know you guys were that close," surprised at his comment.
"We weren't that close until a year ago when we started to work together. All of us feel the same way about each other and that's how we help each other out. And right now..." he slowed down, "I consider you as my brother."
My face flushed, "Umm...thanks...I'm really flattered."
JC smiled back at me.
After a minute or two letting the event sink in, I started to talk. "I don't know about you, but I'm kinda hungry."
"I'm hungry too," JC replied, "There's a little cafe at the entrance of the zoo, not to far from here"
"Sounds good. Let's go."
It didn't take us very long to reach the little cafe and headed in. It wasn't very crowded because it was getting late and the park would close in a couple of hours. I ordered some garden salad while JC ordered a sandwich and some soup. We sat down at a table in the corner next to the windows. I could see the intersection and some of the road out the window and behind JC and watched the cars go by.
I chatted with JC at what I saw in the park and we had a good time. I was half-way done eating my salad when I noticed something. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a very familiar car parked on the curb. I turned my head ever so slightly so that I could get a better look at the car, but still facing JC. Then it hit me. 'That's Justin's car,' I thought to myself. Upon further examination, I saw two figures sitting in the car looking in my direction and chatting with each other. It was Justin and Chris. They were spying on me!
I became very, very angry, but I didn't want to let JC know what was going on. I continued talking to him as though nothing was wrong. That was a difficult feat in itself. After a few more minutes of talking I saw another vehicle which looked familiar. This time, the car was parked at a different spot of the street, out of sight of Justin's car, but I could see it from my vantage point because I could see the intersection very clearly.
This time I didn't have to turn my head or anything because the car I saw was behind JC. It was a red 4 Runner. I thought it was another 4 Runner with the same color as Lance's, but when I looked who was inside the car, I was shocked even more. I saw Lance's spiky hair as well as Joey's Superman necklace talking to each other and looking in my direction just like Justin and Chris. 'They're here too!' I thought.
This time my anger turned in to rage and I couldn't hide it anymore. JC noticed a change in the atmosphere as well as my appearance.
"What's up Mano," asking concerned.
I didn't say a word. I got up and left the table.
"Mano!" JC trying to get me back, "Mano, what's wrong?"
I still didn't answer and walked out of the cafe.
"Wait!" JC yelled as he tried to catch up to me.
I quickly walked to the street away from the intersection, but JC grabbed my should and spun me around.
"Please..." sounding pathetic, "Was it something I said?"
I looked at him dead the eyes with rage burning deep within me, "Don't you give me that shit," I coldly said.
"What?!?" jumping back at my words, "What are you saying?"
"I said don't give me that shit!" saying even colder.
"I...I don't understand what you're saying."
"This...all of this. You guys set me up!" yelling at him hysterically. JC recoiled in fear.
"I thought you were my friends," I resumed my cold monotonous voice, "I thought I could I trust you."
"B..but, you can trust us," almost begging.
"I don't believe you anymore," glaring at him, "How the fuck am I supposed to believe that shit if everyone is watching my every move?"
JC looked at me surprised.
"Don't give me that innocent look. You knew all along. Everyone is here spying on me getting a kick out of the shit you guys put me through. First Justin, then Lance, next Chris, and then Joey and finally you," I pointed at him.
"Please calm down," begging hysterically, "I don't know what you're talking about."
"The hell you don't!" I yelled at him, "You guys put me through hell the entire week. 'Hey I'm rich and famous, I can do whatever I want,'" mocking them.
JC's eyes were beginning to fill with tears.
"'Let's mess with Mano's head and get a good laugh along the way.' Well, it's not going to work anymore. All of you guys, get the fuck away from and I don't ever want to see your faces again.
I backed away and ran out of the zoo. I quickly hailed a cab and left for the hotel.
JC dropped to his knees and started to cry. Lance and Joey saw what happened bolted out of the car and ran towards JC. Justin and Chris saw this as well and did the same thing. When the two groups reached JC, they were surprised to see each other.
"What are you doing here?" they all said in unison as JC still sobbed.
"What happened JC?" Justin knelt down beside him putting his arm around his shoulder.
"Mano...Mano thinks we were using him..." saying in-between breaths.
Lance knelt down on the other side and motioned Justin to help him up and seat him on the bench nearby.
Chris knelt down in front of JC who was sitting down on the bench still crying, "What do you mean we were using him?"
Justin gave him a hug, "It's ok JC...Try to calm down," whispering in his ear.
A minute or so passed and JC sobbed less and less until he stopped. Justin broke from the hug, "You ready?"
"Yeah," JC sniffled, "Mano...Mano said that everything was a set up."
"A set up?" Joey asked.
"That's what he said," JC looking at the ground, "He said that the only reason why all of us became friends is so that we could mess with his head and get a laugh or two."
"What!" Lance said in disbelief, "What made him think that?"
"Actually..." looking at all of them, "...it was you guys."
"Huh?" Justin looked very confused.
"When he saw both of your cars parked on the street and you guys looking at him, he assumed you were spying on him."
"What!" was the only thing Joey could say.
"He took it pretty hard," JC resumed, "And he said he doesn't want to ever see us again," tears began to well up again.
"The only reason why we're here," Chris started up, "Was that all of us were worried about Mano."
JC looked at Chris.
"Yeah, when Justin told us what you said about Mano," Lance spoke up, "We were all concerned."
"We were driving around until we saw your jeep here at the zoo," Joey continued.
"I parked here to wait for you guys to come out of the park," Justin contributed, "When we saw you and Mano, I thought that he was feeling a lot better."
"That was exactly what we did," Lance commented.
"We never meant to spy on him," Chris said.
JC stopped crying, "It's not me that you should talk to, it's Mano. His feelings have been crushed and I really believe that he's not going to recover."
"We didn't mean it..." Joey looked down.
"I know you guys didn't plan on it," JC tried to comfort everyone, "But right now, we have to find him and make him understand."
"You sure he's going to talk to us?" Justin asked nervously.
"He has to listen to us..." looking at the street, "...he just has to."
Everyone lingered around for a little while in silence. They all got up and headed for their cars. They decided that they would go to Justin's house and get the van. Then, they would scour the city from top to bottom in search of me.
I told the cab driver to go straight to the Disney Hotel. He complied and took me there as fast as he could. I paid him and slowly went in. I took the elevator and once I reached my floor, I stepped out. I silently walked to my room and opened the door. I kicked off my shoes and walked to the corner of the room. I sat down and curled up in a tight ball. Tears flowed once again down my cheek, not because of what I have done, but what someone had done to me.
"What the fuck is their problem," yelling out loud still crying, "I've been abused, abandoned, and fucked with....I can't take this anymore!" I continued to cry.
I cried so hard and long that I couldn't see any more. The phone rang, but I let it ring. I couldn't even hear it for I was wallowing in my self-pity. "God damn it! The minute something goes right in my life...all this shit has to happen. No one loves me! No one loves me..." I trailed off as I continued to cry myself to oblivion.....