No Nut November

NO NUT NOVEMBER - CHAPTER 15

When we reentered the dorm room party, I think a lot of the guys were staring at me again. I had my shirt off, which wasn't that weird I guess. I mean, a lot of guys (like the rather homophobic Kai) hung out without shirts a lot. I never had, but plenty of others had. Although I definitely wasn't as built as them. Especially since I hadn't really been working out this past month. I was somewhat fit, but still kind of a skinny guy. Not the kind of guy who would usually hang out with a bunch of bros shirtless. But there I was, no shirt on amongst this sea of my peers.

And then of course there was the whole fact I was wearing a jockstrap, and the strap was riding up above the very loose-fitting athletic shorts Ryan had given me. I had to keep pulling the shorts up as they fell lower, exposing me. But Ryan had insisted I wear his jockstrap at all times since the other boys had made me unlock and throw away my cage. And to ensure I was always wearing it, he needed to always be able to see the strap.

Compared to earlier, Ryan seemed in great spirits now. I was drunk, Ryan was in a good mood--who gave a fuck if my floormates were staring at me. They were going to have to pay me $600 soon enough--we'd see who was laughing then.

We were up for beer pong, and I whispered to Ryan I needed to go pee first, but he insisted I could hold it until the end of the game, that we couldn't hold up the game. And so I tried not to think so much about how crazy I had to pee from all the beer and vodka as Ryan and I took on the reigning champs in beer pong.

And you know, in some ways, focusing on not pissing myself was a good way to stop thinking about how embarrassed I was that all the guys in this room had seen my dick earlier. I managed to sink a couple balls and Ryan slapped my lower back with excitement, running his fingers over the strap of my jockstrap.

I got more and more careless about keeping the loose gym shorts up and am pretty sure my ass crack was showing for big chunks of time, but again, who fucking cared at this point. Everyone was probably as drunk as me.

At one point, Peter slapped his hand on my bare shoulder. "Bro... I gotta say... that's some serious commitment. What was that thing on your dick?" Peter had a smile with boyish dimples. His tight-fitting soccer jersey showed up his defined biceps. He wasn't built the way Kai or even Ryan was -- in fact he was probably closer to my size -- but he seemed super athletic. He probably had great abs. And he had one of those European style haircuts where the sides were shaved close and the top was long and swept over to the side. Like some kind of GQ model.

"Oh, uh... it was like... a cage," I muttered.

Peter looked me up and down, and I hiked up my loose athletic shorts. He definitely did a double-take when he noticed my exposed strap. I wondered if Peter really believed when I said I liked pussy instead of penis. I hadn't stopped thinking about the way he'd told Kai to back off on his homophobic language. A lot of the guys on my floor called each other faggots, so it took guts to speak up about something like that. I know I'd been called a fag growing up before, not that I actually was a fag, just that it's what young guys called each other joking around.

Then, I heard Ryan, "You're up, bitch!" I felt a tug on the waistband of my jockstrap as Ryan yanked me away from Peter and back to the beer pong table. He let go of the strap and it snapped -- hard and loudly -- against my skin. It even stung a little, but I kept my cool.

Still, the two guys we were playing laughed. "Why are you wearing a fucking jockstrap, bro?" one asked. I shrugged and shot my shot. But I could tell other guys were whispering to each other with that exact question. Even in my drunken state, I had a moment of clarity -- it was really weird that I was shirtless and wearing a jockstrap in a room full of dudes right now. My skin suddenly felt kind of cold and exposed and I crossed my arms in front of my chest, my shoulders hunched forward slightly.

I should mention, while it was mostly dudes, the few girls had returned, but they honestly didn't seem to care about me. They kind of acted like I didn't exist, really.

Until near the end of my beer pong game, that is. Then one of the girls, a brunette with big boobs and wide hips, approached me. I could tell she'd just been talking with Kai. He'd sent her, maybe. She snaked around behind me, wrapped her warms around my sides and whispered in my ear, "Hey baby... I hear you've got a big cock."

I felt her breath in my ear, and the way she enunciated, "big cock" sent a shiver down my spine. I felt my dick hardening. She laughed lightly in my ear, then ran her hand down to the front of my shorts and wrapped her fingers around my bulge. "There it is..."

But before anything more could happen, Ryan stepped in, "Get off him."

The girl busted out laughing. "Sorry, I had to see if Kai was telling the truth."

"About what?" I asked, meekly.

"He said you'd get hard as fast as a teenage boy. And that you had a dick like one, too," she said snickering. She went back to Kai. I met eyes with Ryan, and he gave me a look that said, "forget about her." We kept playing, but I felt a little humiliated. I didn't dare look over at Kai, but I knew he probably had a real smug look on his face. I don't know why he had to be such a fucking dick to me. He didn't even know me.

I had never been great at beer pong, but for some reason this time, maybe because I was so buzzed, I was crushing it. Ryan and I were hitting the same cup constantly, making the other team drink. When I got a cup, Ryan would cheer loudly and slap my bare back. I was grinning from ear to ear. I really felt like one of the boys, knocking down cups, drinking beer... it was a real college moment.

I found myself chatting some with Peter during the game. He was hanging around paying attention to the game and seemed like he was cheering me and Ryan's team on. He asked me about my Thanksgiving break and what it was like seeing old friends. He told me how it was weird for him, how he feels like he's already changed so much since coming to college and some of his friends are still stuck in a high school mindset.

I totally got what he meant -- I felt like a very different Ethan than high school Ethan. That's for sure.

When my turn came if I wasn't paying attention or mid-conversation with Peter, I'd feel a strong tug on my jockstrap as Ryan grabbed the back of the strap and yanked me back to the table. "You're up, Eth!" he'd say, somewhat annoyed I hadn't been paying attention, but ultimately not caring as soon as I sunk yet another cup.

I didn't really love how he kept pulling me by my jockstrap, especially in front of Peter who seemed to be taking me more seriously than any of the other bros on my floor. I wondered what he thought about the way Ryan was handling me. If only he knew what all Ryan was making me do. Oh well. We were all drunk. It was fine.

When we won the game, Ryan and I high-fived, and I told him I really needed to go pee. He shook his head while finishing off a cup of beer. "Nah bro, we won so we keep the table. We can't keep the boys waiting around or we'll lose our spot."

Ryan quickly reracked the beer pong cups and we got off on another game. I wanted to protest as I found myself hopping around a bit out of bladder anxiety. But maybe that was why I was so good at pong right now. Maybe this state of needing to pee so bad was making me sink shots. I could use mind over matter and hold it in.

And so we played another game of pong against two other guys. Things started getting especially hazy for me at this point. I hadn't eaten anything for dinner (besides Ryan's cum), and all the vodka Ryan made me chug to help get rid of my boner plus all the beer from playing pong was really making things a little bit spinny. I didn't play as well the second game, but Ryan was absolutely on fire.

He was pretty drunk too. I could tell because his cheeks were getting a little bit flushed. It made him look kind of boyish, actually, especially when he'd smile and I'd see his dimples. He was also talking really loudly and brashly, mocking and taunting the other team. He started snapping my jockstrap against my back for no real reason. I told him to stop multiple times and he always pretended like it was the first time I'd asked. "Oh, sorry, Eth. Won't happen again."

And then it would happen again five minutes later. Oh well. It's not like there was a soul in the room who wasn't aware by now that I was wearing a jockstrap under my ill-fitting athletic shorts. Most of the time I had one hand holding up the waistband and one hand holding my beer. Every time I took a shot in pong I felt them fall down a bit revealing the top of my ass or front of my jockstrap. But it didn't seem like anyone was really paying attention.

Except maybe Peter, actually. He still had a keen interest in watching the game, and I felt like I caught his eyes looking at my jockstrap a few times. But I may have just been imagining. He was standing to the side and slightly behind me, so I guess I couldn't really know. It just felt like he was staring at me.

We won the second game, and apparently I loudly proclaimed that I had to pee and stormed out of the room. I honestly don't quite remember... I don't even remember that we won the game, I just sort of remember being in the bathroom and going into one of the showers. I found out later that I ran so fast down the hall my shorts had finally fallen completely off. Someone found the shorts just lying in the middle of the hall.

So that left me, Ethan Sharp, wearing only my roommates' bleach-white jockstrap, standing in the shower over the drain. Even in my drunk state, I knew I wasn't supposed to use the toilet to pee because I wasn't allowed to take off my jockstrap. I had to do what Ryan made me promise to do.

And the next thing I really remembered was the feeling of warmth in my groin as I just let my dick spray piss into the jockstrap. The white underwear turned yellow as it became soaked in my own piss. It ran over my ass crack and down both of my legs onto the shower floor and I let out a moan of relief. I had to pee so fucking bad it was almost inhuman. At that point, I didn't even care if I was pissing myself in the shower, it just felt like such a relief.

I hadn't turned on the shower but my leg hair was soaked from my own piss. I could smell it. Fuck. I was disgusting. The soaked jockstrap was warm against my skin. I needed to rinse off and get back to the beer pong table quickly. It felt like I'd been pissing for five minutes straight.

And then, just as I reached to turn the shower on, I heard the curtain whip back and I froze. My heart started beating a mile a minute as I saw Kai standing there with a look of shock and disgust.

"What... the... fuck," he said. His eyes slowly scanned down my half-naked body, widening when they saw my piss-stained jockstrap and wet legs.

"Go away," I pleaded.

"We thought you were trying to secretly rub one out, bro," Kai said. And then he started laughing. I turned red. "So you are a fag then, aren't you?" he asked.

I shook my head. My eyes scanned his shirtless torso, with his big pecs and washboard abs. He had a real V-cut with a happy trail revealed above his sweatpants.

"Don't lie to me, bitch."

"I'm not lying. P-pussy not penis," I said, slurring my words a bit.

"Yeah right. I bet you get rock hard at the sight of a big cock."

I wanted to get out of there so badly, but everything was spinning. "No," I protested faintly.

Kai grabbed his bulge through his sweatpants, and I instinctively watched. He smirked. "Yeah, you like cock all right."

"I don't!" I spat at him.

"Don't you dare yell at me, faggot," he spat right back. "I bet if I showed you my dick your little prick would get rock hard."

I shook my head.

"You wanna prove it? Prove you aren't a little faggot and I'll leave you alone."

I nodded. My eyes were still glued on his bulge.

"Get on your knees," Kai commanded.

I didn't even think to protest. Being on my knees in the dorm room shower felt pretty natural to me now. So I obliged, getting on the raw tile floor, which still had my piss all over it. Kai held back a laugh when he saw how quickly I fell to my knees.

And then he pulled out his cock. I think I audibly gasped, which made him laugh again. His dick was massive and uncut. It was like this massive soft serpent, with perfectly trimmed pubic hair. The head was bulbous underneath his foreskin and it looked like the whole package must've weight like 2lbs or something. I don't know how he carried that thing around with him all day every day.

Kai grabbed the base of his cock and wagged it in front of my face. "You love being on your knees, don't you, faggot?"

Somehow just staring at Kai's dick allowed me to forget the stress of being discovered in a piss-soaked jockstrap, made me forget how mean Kai was being to me. Kai started stroking his cock slowly right in front of me. I could smell his musk.

"Answer me, bitch."

"S-sorry..." Everything around Kai's cock was blurred and spinning.

"You want to suck my dick," he said. It wasn't even phrased as a question. It was more a suggestion, or like he was hypnotizing me. And I nodded. "You want to swallow my load." I nodded I again. I was so drunk that all logic had left my brain and something primal was taking over.

"You love sucking cock." Kai said at last, really enunciating the word "cock." And I nodded again.

"Open your mouth, faggot," he commanded, and I did. I looked up at him, the smirk on his face, his alpha energy radiating. In that moment I felt broken, ready to do whatever he asked, completely oblivious to anything else happening in the world. None of this felt like real life.

Kai slipped the tip of his cock into my lips and I felt a jolt of excitement rush through me. I wanted to see his dick hard. I wanted to taste his cum.

But instead, I felt a warm splash hit the back of my throat as Kai unleashed a firehose of warm piss.

I immediately recoiled, falling backward, spitting out Kai's piss, disgusted. But Kai just stepped closer, aiming his spray of piss all over my face, soaking my hair with it. It was a hard spray and it splashed off my cheeks, flecks of it hitting my torso.

"I would never let a fag like you suck my cock," Kai said as he kept pissing all over me. I curled up on the ground against the wall of the shower, trying to protect my face as he soaked me.

"Why are you doing this?" I blurted. "Stop!"

But Kai didn't stop until he was out of piss. "Don't pretend you don't like it. You've got a boner right now you pathetic bitch."

Did I? Fuck, I did. I was hard.

And then I heard another voice: "WHAT THE FUCK?!"

It was Ryan's voice.

And then absolute pandemonium broke loose.

SMACK! Ryan shoved Kai's bare chest with open palms, making him lose his balance and topple to the ground. Ryan jumped on him and punched him hard in the face.

"Fuck off, bro!" Kai growled, throwing Ryan off of him. Kai quickly pulled his pants back up and squared off against Ryan. I opened my eyes, feeling the warm piss quickly cooling, making me shiver on the ground of the shower floor, watching Ryan and Kai go at it.

Ryan threw a punch and Kai dodged, then hit him square in the jaw. "Fuck!" Ryan yelled. Kai kicked him in the stomach and he doubled over. Then Ryan screamed and barreled into Kai, tackling him into another shower stall and ripping the curtain down.

"Woah! Stop it! Stop it!" came another voice. Running into the showers to join the mayhem now was Peter. "You're both wasted, knock it off!" Peter managed to get in between the two of them and stop the fight. Both of the alphas nursed their wounds a bit, shooting daggers at one another.

And that's when Peter saw me huddling on the shower floor in a piss-soaked jockstrap. "Both of you get the fuck out of here," Peter said. Ryan spat at Kai's feet. There was blood in his spit. But then he left. Peter looked to Kai, "Go to bed, bro." Kai shook Peter off and left.

Peter's eyes were wide, his breathing heavy, as he stood at the edge of the shower looking down at me. "Are you okay?"

I nodded, not wanting to meet Peter's eyes. Peter reached to the shower handle and turned on the water. "Get under the water," he said softly.

I crawled over to be under the fountain of water, overtop the drain. I tried to stand but everything was spinning too much. I was too drunk.

"Damn, bro, how much did you drink?" Peter asked.

"Everything's spinning," I said. I started to feel sick. I spat into the drain, a long string of drool coming from my lips.

"If you need to throw up, just get it over with," Peter said. I looked up at him, standing over me, watching me in probably the worst state I've ever been in. Fuck. I started dry-heaving on all fours, aiming my mouth to the shower drain. Inadvertently, my bare ass stuck up in the air right in view of Peter. He'd be able to see my bare ass in the jockstrap, my exposed asshole, everything. Right as I managed to finally puke into the shower.

I felt a little better right away. "There you go, let it out," Peter said. Once I'd finished throwing up, I slowly rose to my feet and rinsed myself off properly.

Peter turned the water off and held a towel out for me. I stumbled closer to him, almost knocking into him. He wrapped the towel around my shoulders. It felt like a warm hug. "Th-thanks," I muttered.

"Come on, let's get you some water," Peter said and led me out of the bathroom. I was still somewhat dripping wet, and with the towel wrapped around my shoulders my lower-half was still exposed in just Ryan's jockstrap. At least I had managed to rinse it with water so it just looked wet now and not like it was soaked in piss. Although it was so wet that it really clung to my package and was almost see-through.

I was grateful nobody else was in the hallway at that time. Nobody saw me exposed like that except Peter who kept turning around to make sure I was following. I noticed his eyes dart down to my see-through jockstrap a couple times.

Peter led me to his dorm room and closed the door. He grabbed me another towel to dry off. "My roommates still not back from break. You wanna sleep here tonight?"

"Why?" I asked as I toweled off my legs and face.

"Look... I don't know what's going on with you and Ryan and Kai, but I just thought maybe you might need to get away from all that to someplace safe for a night. You can just crash here and we can figure it out in the morning."

Crashing sounded great right now. It sounded really great. Peter handed me a bottle of water and I chugged. I only faintly realized that I had dropped both towels and was still standing in front of him in just a jockstrap.

"You want some dry underwear?" Peter asked. I looked down at my bulge, then back up at him. He was getting ready for bed, pulling his soccer jersey over his head, revealing an impeccably fit body with amazing muscle definition. He had a light dusting of chest hair.

"I'm good," I said.

"Well... I don't know if it's a good idea for you to sleep in my roommates bed in that thing... it's kind of... dirty."

"I have to keep it on," I said flatly.

Peter seemed genuinely confused, but didn't question it more. He laid another towel on top of the bed. "Okay... just lay on top of this then. Don't get under the covers."

"Thank you," I said, collapsing onto the bed. Peter shook his head. I must have looked super out of it.

Peter pulled off his shorts revealing some tight black boxer briefs. His legs were also really tight and defined, and his package was pushed up in the tight boxer briefs such that I could clearly make out his full shaft.

Now in just his boxer briefs, Peter sat on the edge of my bed. "You sure you're okay?"

I looked up into his big, almond-colored eyes. Why was he being so nice to me? We'd barely ever talked before tonight. And now here he was, despite having found me soaked in piss and puking in the showers, taking care of me, offering to give me clean underwear and a place to sleep.

"I'm just drunk is all. I'm sorry."

"You don't need to be sorry for anything, just wanna make sure you're okay, bro."

"I never want to drink again."

Peter laughed. Seeing his face light up in laughter made my heart beat a little faster. I smiled up at him.

"Okay... you have a good night, buddy," he said. And he leaned his taut torso down over me, placed his hand on the side of my head, and gave me a kiss on the forehead. Like he was tucking me in.

His eyes were so close to me now, I could see his long eyelashes, could see how his stylish hair was a little frazzled. His mouth still curved into a smile from laughing, showing his dimples. He had such a warm smile.

I reached up with one hand and wrapped it around the back of his neck. Then leaned up and pulled Peter into a kiss. I felt my lips on his lips -- my lips on another boy's lips -- Ethan Sharp's drunken lips on soccer boy Peter's perfect boyish lips -- and I suddenly felt wide awake, like something in my heart had exploded with a radiant energy and all my limbs were tingling.

But no sooner had I pulled Peter into a kiss than he pulled away with a jolt, a shocked expression on his face. "Oh, uh..."

He didn't want me to kiss him. I'd just drunkenly grabbed a straight boy and kissed him. A straight boy who had been so nice to take care of my pathetic drunken ass. "Sorry," I muttered. My body still sung with an energy of exhilaration, but now a wave of dread rose up and threatened to crash down overtop of me.

"It's cool... I'm just... not like that," Peter said.

Not like that. Not like that. He wasn't like that. Wasn't like me. He didn't watch other guys jack off. He didn't suck other guys dicks. I did that.

I watched the half-naked soccer boy walk to the door and kill the lights. Then he crawled in his own bed. He had a distant look on his face. I was lucky he didn't kick me out.

Not long after that, Peter fell asleep. I heard his heavy breathing -- not quite a snore, just long, slow breaths. But it took me longer to fall asleep. My energy had skyrocketed when I kissed him. Why had he kissed me on the forehead like that? Why had he been so nice to me? Part of me had felt so electrified at kissing a boy like that. Why? Maybe because it was just such a novel thing. It was exciting to try something new. Maybe I was just feeling some kind of way toward him for saving me. It would've been really exhilarating if he'd kissed me back. If I could've felt his tongue penetrating my mouth, felt his teeth biting at my lip.

But of course he wouldn't do that. I was just drunk and stupid. I was so fucking stupid. I couldn't believe the stupid situation I'd let myself get into. It all started when I let my floormates take my cage away. Then I had to wear the jockstrap, which meant I had to piss in the shower, which allowed Kai to find me and... do what he did to me. Which was so mean. Like, really really mean. But if I hated it so much, why did I have a boner the whole time he was pissing on me?

Hell, why did I have a boner right now? Fuck. I needed to sleep. I looked over at Peter's sleeping form. I thought about creeping over and peeking under the covers, seeing if I could get a closer look at his bulge. But what if he woke up while I was doing it? I wouldn't be able to bear it.

Maybe I could just imagine another guy busting a nut to make my boner go away. I tried to picture Ryan in the shower, slowly stroking his shaft. But then suddenly I was picturing Kai instead, his dick grown to full mast, choking me with his dick. I didn't want to think about that. I thought instead of Caleb and how he'd let me reluctantly blow him after I paid him twenty bucks.

I wonder if Peter would ever let a guy blow him. I imagined being on my knees in front of those black boxer briefs, pulling them down, then stroking his cock. Maybe while he still wore his soccer jersey. And he smiled down at me with those boyish lips and dimples. Thinking to himself, "Hey, this feels pretty good, even if it is a boy."

My dick was still rock hard. What if I just reached into the jockstrap and stroked it right now? My fingers slid down my stomach to the waistband. I slipped my fingertips inside, grazing my pubic hair. Then felt my fingers graze the root of my cock.

No. I just had to sleep. Everything would be okay in the morning. I withdrew my hand. If I nutted right now, then all the bullshit I'd been put through this month would be for nothing. I couldn't let that happen. I had to win.

Thanks for reading ;)

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-Ethan