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Once we got out things weren't really the same anymore, but while inside things were electric. It was only a week, but definitely a week I'll never forget.
I was in the psych ward, in fact I'd just woken up there with no memory of how I got there, no memory of the several preceding days, in fact. This is why I always say I can't take Xanax, not if there's more than one in my possession anyway, and especially not if I'm drinking. At any rate, after realizing where I was I knew the drill, and set to work on trying to convince the doctor there to release me. Only problem was that it was the weekend, and so I was going to have to wait until Monday to see her.
"Oh well," I thought, "I'll just have some fun. Who knows what I can get up to in here."
And I was absolutely correct, not that I realized how fully correct I even was at the time. I quickly made friends with a girl on the same unit as I was, Katerina, and we would talk fairly often every day, at least when she wasn't with her new psych ward boyfriend, a guy she had just met and suddenly fallen for inside. He was pretty cute, but obviously he was hers. I was hoping they'd give me a cute roommate next as I didn't have one at the moment and they usually tried to pair people together of the same sex and roughly the same age. Previously when I'd been hospitalized I had had a very attractive roommate, and although he hadn't been gay it had been nice to watch him.
On the Monday after the weekend ended we got a new person, and seeing him instantly set my sexual motor into overdrive, which was already pent up anyway. He was young, probably within a few years of my age, so mid-to-late twenties; he was tall, with brown hair and a five o' clock shadow, and he had many tattoos on his arms and legs. He was rather thin and looked as though he had been using drugs proficiently before coming in, most likely meth. He also looked a bit like a country boy, or at least moreso than I am (which is not difficult to do). I pointed him out to Kat at lunch and she agreed with me that he was very sexy, grinning at me when I laid out my hopes that he'd be my next roommate.
"Well," she said, "your room is empty, right?"
"Exactly," I laughed, "and it would be nice to have a distraction... unless he's a total weirdo and goes into the bathroom I'm sure he'll change in front of me. I mean why not. Especially if he doesn't know I'm gay."
"Are you sure... that you'll be able to hide it from him?"
She asked, and I had a laugh at that one because she was completely correct, I couldn't hide it, from him or anyone. But I could certainly downplay it.
"Why is he sitting alone? Ask him to sit with us."
She continued, to which I gave a firm hell no.
"I don't want him to think I'm a creep!" Was my response when she asked why not.
When we got back to the unit I saw that most likely my prayers had been answered, as I had a new roommate. I could tell because the bed was made and there were new brown paper sacks with clothes on top of the covers. I didn't know exactly who was my roommate, but I assumed it was the new guy. If so, then his name was Phoenix. Odd name. Later on at dinner I noticed that the cute new guy was, once again sitting by himself. I walked towards his table, intending to sit down, but at the last moment I veered away and sat somewhere else. I was scared. I resolved to try to sit next to him in the common room when we got back to the unit; that is, if he decided to sit out there tonight, because I hadn't noticed him earlier. Kat thought it was a great idea.
That night I finally saw him, walking out of my room, our room, for the cigarette break. I thanked my lucky stars; finally, some entertainment! As you well know, psych wards are very boring, and if I could at least find a cute guy to watch I'd be a very happy man. Well, it looked like I'd found just that. I smiled to myself, already anticipating seeing him change his clothes that night. I really hoped he wouldn't by shy, wouldn't be anywhere close to shy.
The guy, Phoenix, ended up getting the lighter before me and turned around after lighting his cigarette; I reached out to grab it but he lit it- I accidentally touched his hand as I reached out, landing on a tattoo he had. At the same time, I put my cigarette forward and lit it from his flame, apologizing afterwards. He smiled at small little smile at me before walking away.
"Holy shit." I said to myself. I was sweating. Fuck, he was cute. I was so ready for that night; I hoped I wouldn't be disappointed. As it turned out, I was not.
"Hey, I'm Nick," the guy introduced himself when I walked into my room after cigarette break; he was changing his shirt and shirtless but walked forward to shake my hand, "My name is Phoenix by I go by Nick. You?"
His hand was warm in mine and I was slow to let go. He was thin and wiry but you could see muscle underneath. He pulled a new shirt on me and looked at me, expectantly.
"Oh, uh I'm Eric. You?"
I stumbled over my words; he laughed.
"Nick, I just told you."
I winced at myself as he turned to organize his clothes.
"My bad dude," I said, "how old are you though?"
"28."
He was only 3 years younger than me. I smiled to myself. He turned around and grinned at me. He was missing one incisor, I assumed from meth use.
"Well, gotta shower."
He said, and walked into the little bathroom connected to our room, bringing his clothes with him and drawing the curtain closed.
"You don't need this, do you?" He called out.
"Uhh.. no. I don't need the bathroom." I replied, sitting down on my bed with my hands in my jeans pockets. I watched his shadow through the curtain as he pulled down his pants and then pulled off his underwear. Fuck. I started to get erect. He took off his shirt and I could see the shadow of his bulge through the curtain as he turned to take off his socks and shoes, which I could see underneath the curtain as it wasn't long enough. I started to touch my cock through my pants pocket and he moved out of my line of sight as he got into the shower. I attempted to imagine what he was doing as I heard the water turn on and him get into the shower. I imagined him first washing his hair, his face, his shoulders... his armpits and chest. I remembered his shirtless body and started to breathe swiftly as I pulled on my dick underneath my jeans, keeping one eye on the door to our room, which was almost shut but not quite. The techs liked to check on people in their rooms to make sure they weren't doing anything they weren't supposed to be doing; weren't doing exactly what I was doing now most likely.
I moaned to myself quietly and pushed my hand down inside my jeans, grabbing my dick and jerking it. What was he doing now, I wondered. Surely he was washing his dick, lathering it up with soap. I imagined him rubbing back and forth on his dick with his hands under the running water, going lower and washing his balls. I wondered if he was hairy. Then, I imagined him going down his legs and washing his feet. They were rather big, a I recalled. I was getting close to orgasm. I prayed none of the techs would come into the room. I started to breathe raggedly as I got closer; the water shut off and I could see Nick drying himself off with his towel through the the curtain. I even saw a flash of skin through a crack on the side of the curtain where it didn't touch the wall. Fuck he turned me on. He started to put his clothes back on, much to my despair. I'd hoped he'd do that in front of me. I watched a he pulled his underwear on and I knew I was about to cum. When he pulled his pants up I felt that familiar feeling growing down in my cock and pulled my shirt up by reflex although I didn't need to as my dick wasn't outside of my pants.
Suddenly, the curtain separating the bathroom jerked open; at the same time I began to cum, frantically pulling my hand back out of my jeans so Nick wouldn't see, but I suspected it was too late and he knew exactly what was happening. My face was red, I was breathing heavily, and attempting to move my pants out of his line of vision. Nick grinned coyly at me as he zipped up his jeans and buttoned them. Then, he left the room.
I turned around and shoved my face into my pillow. What had just happened?! Fuck I was embarrassed! I hoped and prayed that he either couldn't tell what I'd been doing, although I was 90 percent sure he had, or that he at least wouldn't hold it against me or wouldn't think it had anything to do with him. After all, guys gotta do their business, right? Where else are you gonna do it? I was so scared.