Codes you awake 12 Maxieplus
We drove home and it was nice to see the beach house again. Nothing had changed. When I saw Mitch's car my heart sank. I prayed this was going to go right for him, but I had my doubts, because somewhere deep down I still adored him.
"He's probably up at the bluff baby. He's been spending a lot of time up there lately," Squirt said.
"Then I will be back soon dad, wish me luck."
I walked up the beach then trudged up the hill to the bluff.
I found a lone figure up there and he was sitting on the seat, it was Mitch. He was crying and I could hear his sobs as I stopped in my tracks. He suddenly stood up and screamed,
"Help me, dear God help me." He was screaming into the wind.
I fought and fought my inner self about going over there to tell him I loved him. I guess my softer side won; after all I had partly caused this to this beautiful man. I slowly walked over and sat with him. I said nothing as Mitch quietly wiped his tears from his face.
"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Cody, I was trying to please everyone and I forgot you are everything and I should have backed you up. Don't try to forgive me because I don't deserve you or your love. Please just try to move on and live a beautiful life."
I didn't answer him. I took out my phone and snapped a couple of photos; our sky was in brilliant form. Then he said,
"I do need your help though Cody."
"What help would that be Mitch?"
"I want you to help me bring up my son, no strings attached."
I wondered why he would bring that kid into the conversation. What the hell could I do, bring it up? Yeah right.
"You're talking in fucking riddles again Mitch, spill it, what do you mean?"
"Belinda doesn't want a kid Cody. She went ahead with the pregnancy because of me and how I felt about it. She says when he's three months old I have to take him and bring him up but she insisted you have to help me."
I looked at him. Bobby's painting explained he could have told me earlier, but it doesn't matter anymore.
"Well I don't want anything to do with you or your fucking kid." I stood up and started walking away.
"I love you Codes. I love you with all my heart, but I can't abandon my son, I just can't," he cried out.
I stopped and some warmth crept in, I let it because I was so cold inside, turning to look at him I answered,
"I will always love you Mitch, that hasn't changed one bit, and it will never change. You spoilt me with your love. You took my heart and wrapped it with yours but you crushed it at the same time. I'm now so cold inside I fear I will never get warm again, but I can't go back to you treating me like you do.
I'm not strong enough, I have to move forward, good night Mitch."
His tears rolled down his cheeks and he couldn't stand it anymore. He jumped up and held me crying into my shoulder then he kissed me deeply. I froze because my heart started beating again, the noise was thumping in my ears but I turned and walked away.
Walking back down the beach I was confused more than ever and when I went up the steps I saw Dan and Cody were cuddled up on the sofa so I sat on the cushions on the floor.
"Did you know about the baby?"
"Yes son, Mitch told us when he got home. After Belinda's parents left she told him he could deal with it. He has to bring their son up because she was too over it to care anymore, plus she's going to live in London, I think to get away from her overbearing parents."
"Oh."
"So how do you feel, do you feel like being a father?"
"I don't know, I didn't know, I just don't know dad. I have just said some terrible things to Mitch, things I should take back. I still love him dads, I really do that's never going to change, it's just I don't think we understand each other that much, loving each other just isn't enough."
"Well in two days he's going to be here again for the football camp, is that going to be a problem?" Dan asked.
"No dad, I'll stay out of his way I guess, he's a bloody mess."
"We know baby, he's not as strong as you, are you sure love isn't enough baby?"
"I'm not strong dad, look how I dealt with his rejection, I went to pieces, I'm weak dad."
"I doubt that Codes look what you achieved in Mitch's life. You basically saved him and his parents. You certainly gave Luke a kick up the bum and Conner and Ben have so much to thank you for. You maybe think your not strong but you have something a lot of people haven't and that's a perfect heart. I can't tell you what's going to happen with you and Mitch but I do know he loves you deeply and I also know there is not one person that comes in contact with you who isn't effected by your loving nature." I went to say something and Dan held his hand up then Squirt continued the conversation.
"He's maybe a little thoughtless Codes but he's not a player. He isn't looking over your shoulder for his next fuck, he loves only you and for him in his world that love is enough," Squirt said to me.
"I feel so stupid dad, what I did was just plain dangerous. How can I forgive myself? Dad, how can I take back the words I said to you on the phone, everything is so lost?" I was confused and I didn't know what to do about it. I can help other people but I can't help myself.
"Codes your words were not even worth thinking about because in the end I love you so much. Of course you have to love me, I'm your dad." Dan smiled at me.
I blushed then Squirt kissed him.
"He's going to have trouble from the grandparents dads, he may crumble under the pressure."
"He needs a strong friend to help him Cody."
"Maybe, you all know how I love a good cause." I had a lot to think about again, but why would Belinda want me to help Mitch bring her boy up? Perhaps she sees something I don't; maybe she sees my love for him or vice versa? I didn't know her that well but Mitch does and maybe he's told her about me, yes that could be the answer. I heard Mitch's car start and roar out of the car park. I wanted to go find out where he was going but I had held back too long.
Conner and Ben joined us and after a heap of hugs Conner put his foot in it and asked me when his nephew will be arriving. I was stunned a bit. I never thought about the dads or Con. How they would feel having a new baby in the house. I got up and started walking down to the log then listened to the surf, yes so much to think about.
I showered and got into bed and Ben and Conner came and lay down with me. They were trying to get me back to as normal as possible but I made them go to their bed, I wanted to think. When I turned my light out I was thinking about how much I had hated that baby. It was the cause of my problems with Mitch. But how could a tiny thing like that destroy my life and now I'm thinking of letting it into my heart and home? My phone lit up there was a message, 'I love you Cody.'
I read and re-read the message then saved it with the rest of Mitch's messages he had sent me over the past months. A few tears rolled down my cheeks and I forgave him. I forgave him because it was the easiest thing I could do and maybe the right thing for me, yes love is enough in any form; the rest is just life's crap getting in the way.
'I'm so cold baby, I need your arms to warm me up, come home, I love you.' I stared at the message for ages and then pushed send. If he doesn't come over then that's it, I can't rely on him anymore. I can't trust him to make me safe and happy. I drifted off as the adrenalin was leaving my body, making me tired and when he crawled in beside me, he held me in his arms once again, I felt warm and loved as he kissed my neck.
"Please don't ever do that to me again Mitch."
"I won't, I promise, trust me please Cody, please trust me."
"I will Mitch, so sleepy, I love you baby, thank you for coming." I rolled into him my left hand rested on his thigh; my right cupped his wet cheek.
Of course my sleep was undisturbed and deep. My near mental exhaustion was dealt with that night when I totally gave myself to Mitch again. The kissing had started early, and after he made us coffees, I lay and just basked in his smells. I knew I could never give this man up. It wouldn't matter what he did to me I couldn't throw him away because I needed him so fucking much in my life. Brian is straight, but I believe he will become a good friend.
Mitch kissed me repeatedly and then my bedroom door swung open, my gorgeous brother and his equally hunky boyfriend, stood there in shock. They slapped Mitch's hand and jumped into bed with us, of course I was tickled until I nearly cried. I noticed Ben had half a woody again, when he left to go shower, another fan I think.
"Good morning dad." I kissed Cody.
"I heard you had a visitor last night."
"One more chance dad, just one more. I love him, I can't help it but he knows he's on notice. God who am I kidding? Two more chances Codes, I'll give him two, and yes, you were right, love is enough." I smiled.
"Thought so." My dad smiled at me.
Dan came out with more coffee and Mitch followed, he had been crying. I knew this because his eyes were red and his face flushed. I noticed also his hands shook when he picked up his cup. My first thought was to help him; my second was to let him deal with it. He tried to talk about Ayden but I didn't want to deal with him at the moment, I just wanted Mitch. Selfish, I know, but before the baby I was happy. I wanted us to get back on track before we tackled a kid.
There was knocking on the door and Conner went to answer it, Mike and Ros walked in and they immediately made a beeline in my direction. Their hugs said it all; they loved me and were so worried. The mood brightened up as Con and Ben made more coffee. I was a bit distant and let the family enjoy the moment. Again I excused myself and took my drink and went to sit on the log. I was thinking about Brian and how he was getting along and I wanted to ring him. In a way I missed him. I pulled my phone out and dialed.
"I got home okay and all's good. I guess I will give it another go."
"Well you know where to come next time, the girls will be waiting; did you ring your Uncle?"
"Not yet Brian, my dad helped him set it up so I'm going to get him to do some sort of prospectus for you and then you will have to come up and meet Uncle Mike and see his set up."
"Sounds great Cody, thank you I sort of have to go mate, Michelle's just jumped in the shower and I'm a really dirty boy." I laughed along with him.
"Talk later mate, thank you." I hung up.
"Your new boyfriend Codes?"
"Yes Mitch, he's a great guy and you are going to love him, oh and he's straight."
"I like him already just because you like him." He smiled.
"Can we talk a bit?"
"Sure." I looked at him.
"You shocked me, that's all Cody, Belinda's parents are ass holes but they try their hardest to manipulate her. I had to stay to protect her."
"She could have come with us. She doesn't have to put up with that shit in her own home."
"She wants you and me to bring up the baby because she doesn't want her parents involved with Ayden." I was stunned.
"She wants to move to London and she wants you and me to take the baby after three months. She made me promise to make it right with us before she makes her final decision. We couldn't talk about it while her parents were there. We were coming to see you the next day to ask you if it would be all right but you had gone and I was so worried about you." He sniffled and went on.
"She said she would feel happier if you were involved with his rearing but she will understand if you give it a miss and dumped me. She wasn't very happy with me that night Codes, and I wasn't either. I was trying to do the right thing by everyone but you, and it all backfired."
"Well Mitch, instead of trying to make everyone else happy, how about you just concentrate on yourself and me for a change? I know why you froze, it was because you are still hiding the fact you are gay, you have to learn to live with it and accept that you will never be straight."
"Just what Belinda told me Cody. I promise to make you happy and to put you first. I love you so much Cody Lawrence. This is killing me and it's all my fault. There's something else I have to tell you, I was only allowed to tell you and nobody else."
"What's that Mitch?"
"Belinda's gay Codes." He smiled.
"What?"
"She's gay, she doesn't want her parents to know that's why she's moving to London. She knows they won't travel overseas but she can't take a baby with her. As I said, she went through with it because of me and you. She wanted to give us the precious gift of a son." He kissed me deeply.
"Cody, Mitch, lunch is ready," Squirt yelled.
Mitch and I jumped and after a few more kisses I decided I was all of a sudden famished as he gently ran his hand over my face. I will never leave this man. I couldn't even get mad with him because of one thing; these moments on our own were just magic.
I had perked up and a smile crept over my face because of Mitch's news. Somewhere deep down I had thought he and Belinda might get married because of the baby, but no doubts now, none at all, a kid? Fuck me.
"You are so going to love Brian, dad, he's so like you and I think he will give you a run for your money wit wise."
Squirt smiled and kissed me as I helped in the kitchen.
"Well he better not try to take over my territory because he will get his comeuppance quick smart." He grinned at me then Mitch.
"Well you will love him dad, he's so Uncle Mike."
"Where are Conner and Ben?" I continued.
"They will be back soon, they went to get ice cream."
"Oh I love ice cream dad." I swooned.
"Yeah I can tell by your big hips son."
"Where?' I looked around my lower body.
"Sucked in." Squirt laughed all the way out to the porch. He slapped hands with Dan and Mike then pouted at me.
When my brother and his boyfriend arrived with the ice cream he gave me a big hug and kissed my cheek. It was nice of him to be concerned for me.
"He's usually not that slow Codes, we were so worried about you and yes he treated you like shit. I think he has a little more growing up to do son but thank you for staying in our lives," Mike whispered to me. Another concerned relative or was that father in law? Ros took my hand and kissed it and I wanted to just fade into the background but I guess they were worried and I was sorry I scared them, it wasn't the best idea I have had.
Luke and Jamie arrived in the afternoon and they had just got back from seeing the builder. They were as pleased as everyone else I was home safely. Lukey pushed Conner out of the way to sit next to me and he also grabbed my hand. Uncle Jamie was bringing us up to date with the house. They are going to pour the concrete slab next week and he was so excited. He wanted me to go up there with him tomorrow. I had been there a couple of times and each time something different was happening. It was well back from the lip of the cliff but nowhere near Jimmy's seat. Everything looked so different.
"I have work tomorrow, if I still have a job that is." I looked Squirt's way.
"It's okay baby, Drew's taking over, he's better suited." He smiled.
"But dad, Mr. Aslan?"
"I got this one son, he's decided he can't stand the subterfuge so I will meet with him for lunch once a month." He laughed.
I was tired later in the day as all these people around me were wearing me down, so I excused myself and went for a nap, of course Mitch wasn't too far behind me. I watched as he stripped and slid between the sheets and when he pulled me in I felt so loved. He sighed and kissed my head several times before I went to sleep.
The next few days were wonderful, Mitch treated me a lot better and he asked me several times if I was happy and could he do anything for me. He was being nice, I was being suffocated. Dad Dan caught my ear one morning. He wanted me to go to the charity with him because he had something for me to do. I left Mitch at home as he said he was going to see his dad and asked if I could meet him for lunch at the café; I accepted.
"What are we here for dad?"
"You need a job and I am going to show you what you're going to do."
"Oh I suppose I should start looking for work dad, what do you want me to do?"
"Sit at my desk son and turn the computer on."
"Okay, do you want me to do your emails and things?"
"Yes Codes, just answer the questions then you can go on Facebook or something."
"What?"
"Well that's all I do, but don't tell Squirt." He smiled.
"Fuck me dad, that's no job."
"Cody I really have to say this to you and don't get upset with me."
"What now dad?"
"Don't say fuck." He roared laughing and I couldn't help but laugh along.
"Seriously Codes, you could come here for a couple of hours a day, there's really not much to do because the management do it all, but Squirt, I want you doing something. You can't sit at home all day. You have to get out a bit, go and play with the kids or something."
"I understand dad but I have already decided what I am going to do. For the time being I want to work at the café.It's a job I know and I loved working there after school. Then I am going to be a full time stay at home dad, I won't be going on to university."
"What?"
"You heard me dad and don't say what, say I beg your pardon." It was my turn to laugh at dad's shocked face.
"Cody you have to go to uni, we will help with Ayden but you have to have an education."
"Dad I already have an education, Mitch makes good money and I can do some shifts at the café just until he starts kindy then I can think about university, but I don't hold out much hope of doing it." I was being sensible about it. I can't let my dads bring our son up. They have done their bit, it's time they relaxed and enjoyed his company not start rearing a kid again. I think Mitch will go along with it but I will talk to him tonight.
"Okay Codes but Squirt will have other ideas I'm sure." He smiled, I once again groaned.
Mitch met me in the coffee shop, we ordered coffee and took a table away from the crowd.
"Now I want to talk about our boy and how we are going to handle it," I started.
"Codes I got it covered, I can look after him during the day when you are at school. If I have to go to training or a club meeting Squirt will do it. That frees you up to study and look all student like for when I get home." He grinned.
"I'm not going to university Mitch, Ayden will need both of us and you can't do it all the time. Also there's your dad's nursery to help with too. I want to just do some part time shifts at the café, that will bring in food money but are you prepared to pay out for us until he go's to school, by then I will be ready for uni?"
He looked disappointed but I could see his brain ticking over.
"Not happening Codes, I want you to go to university because that's the plan. As far as Ayden goes we will cope, there are plenty of Uncles here to help and living in Luke's apartment will be a big plus because we will have help on tap."
"What?"
"You heard Codes we move into Luke and Jamie's flat then if we need someone to help, your dads are just up the stairs. We can do the house thing in five or six year's time but for now we both will need guidance with him. They did a wonderful job with you, Tim and Conner so I'm hoping they will help do the same with our son." By now he had taken my hands.
"But Mitch."
"No buts Codes, you go to uni. Now what do you want to study there?"
"I don't know yet, I am avoiding thinking about it."
"Okay we can discuss it when we have a free moment. Is there a list of things you can do or does that depend on your school grades or something?"
"Well I did think about doing physiotherapy but now I'm leaning towards sports massage, I could get a job in dad's gym after I graduate."
"Over my dead body, those guys at the gym are randy buggers."
"Good." I smiled and took his hand then said,
"Want to be my first job?"
"Yes please." He grinned.
Round one out of the way and we didn't really change the subject just moved on to making plans for Ayden's future. It was one of the best coffees I have had in a long time; we even managed to laugh a bit. We continued our conversation on the log at the beach when we got home but it was getting late and I had to start dinner. We kissed a lot more, then we headed for the house.
Just as we got to the bottom stairs Squirt came barging through the doors and he yelled at me.
"Cody Lawrence there is no way I will let you ditch university. Not happening and that requires no further discussion." He was pissed.
I got to the top of the stairs and looked at him.
"Okay dad, no problem." I smiled.
Then I took my man's hand and walked him towards the bedroom. Squirt was left red faced standing on the porch.
"Hang on Mitch, I want to have another go." He grinned at me as I yelled at dad,
"And dad before you start again, we are taking over Uncle Luke and Jamie's apartment when they move, no arguments, no discussions."
I then ran to the bedroom and closed the door.
"That will piss him off more." I chuckled as my man started to strip me so we could take a shower.
I don't know if this is a one off with Mitch but I sure hope it's not. He seems to have settled in to accepting living on the beach and little Ayden will love it here. I really didn't want to move anyway. Guess I had better look into sports medicine then, but I think you have to be a doctor to do that one. I haven't got time to do all that.
"Codes is that okay?"
"Yes Mitch, a little faster and harder thanks."
That day he lifted his game and gave me a wonderful feeling that I was wanted and loved.
By the time we had dressed dad had the dinner sorted. He kept looking at me very strangely. I kept my mouth shut for fear of retribution but I did allow a small smirk here and there.
"I want you both to help me clean the units tomorrow morning, if you don't mind." He was a little miffed.
"No dad, we passed the cleaning company on the way in today, no need to re-do them if you get my point." I smirked quite brazenly. He threw his pencil on the table and said,
"I give in, what's happening, tell me and tell me now?"
I looked at Mitch and we both burst out giggling.
So we told him our plans and he was more settled after that, he even offered to do the ice cream.
"Codes you awake?"
"Yes baby."
"You want to live here don't you?"
"Yes I do."
"Good because I don't want to mow lawns like the other guys."
"Good Mitch, are you hard again yet?"
"Yes Codes."
He put his cock into my hand.
"Good, just the way I like you."
The boys started to arrive late morning the next day; some groaning and some happy to throw their bags in their rooms and head for the surf. A welcome barbeque was organized and it was wall-to-wall muscle on the porch for the coaches talk with something to eat. I looked around and thought, which ones were sniggering behind our backs and which ones were genuine? My dads opened their property for the club and the training camp, can't they see the goodness in their hearts? But I didn't dwell too long, my eyes caught a glint and they stayed there for a moment; Mitch was staring at me.
I had an idea while they were doing the talk, so I went and put my yellow Aussie Bum Dares on, grabbed my board and towel then walked up the side of the house. I didn't have to look at the house; I dropped my towel and ran into the surf to maybe catch some waves and give Mitch a good show as I paddled out to sea.
Conner was the first on the scene when I finished an hour later. I was drying myself off and trying to get all that sand out of my bathers when he ran up and said,
"Dad wants you to tone it down Codes, you're going to get us into trouble again."
"Go tell dad he's no fun anymore, did Mitch get a good look Con?"
"More than a good look Codes, there were three others that got a good look in too, I noticed." He smiled.
"Well that separated the straights from the gays then, have you got names?"
"Cody no; don't even go there. I am a bit worried about Ben staying though. I can't stay inside but his presence might get people thinking and I haven't the heart to ask him if he would mind going home for a few weeks. I would die if it came to that." We sat on the log and I thought about it for a while.
"Why don't you move him into Rory's place Con? Then when you sneak out for a run you can call in, just tell the guys he's their boarder." I smiled, he's a bit thick, my brother.
`That's a great idea Cody, why didn't I think of that?"
"Because you're not as smart as me Conner."
He thumped my arm and ran, bloody scaredy cat.
I went to shower and as if by magic Mitch appeared sitting on the bench up the side, he's getting another perve in.
"I don't think I will survive two weeks Codes, you look so fucking hot in those bathers."
"Thank you Mitch, I have it all sorted out. I think Ben's going to move into Rory's for a week or two so I have to visit him a lot and while you're out jogging you can maybe call in too, problem solved." I am unofficially turning Rory's house into a gay beat.
When Ben arrived that night Conner had already settled down in the portable with his mates, he looked down then said,
"Someone lost some money today, I found it sitting on the hood of my car at work."
"How cool is that, what did you do, did you keep it?"
"Nah I handed it in and the cops said they would make inquiries." They counted it and there was ten grand in the bag, my guess someone's takings for the day."
"I missed Conner didn't I?" he looked depressed.
"Yes Ben but I feel he's going for a run later tonight with Mitch, here's the keys." I handed Rory's keys to him.
"What are these for?"
"Uncle Rory's house. I moved some of your clothes over there earlier, why don't you stay there? Con might call in for a drink of water on his way." I winked; he didn't get it either.
"Well he might go for an early morning run with me and Mitch too and he could call in for another drink of water." Wink.
The penny dropped and he rushed off to collect some bathroom stuff then was out the door within five minutes, waving goodbye to us all. Buddies just having some fun; yeah right. I noticed he was sitting on Rory's verandah watching the clouds roll by then I spied Con going for a run.
I missed Mitch's kisses that night but I got plenty of messages and during the day all I could do was watch him train. Uncle Jamie grabbed hold of me and we walked up to the bluff. On the way he thanked me again for putting a bomb under Luke's ass. He knows Luke will love the house when it's finished and he wanted to feel like I could go there anytime to sit on our seat, although we haven't started to do that much yet. This baby had been consuming Mitch's every waking hour and I didn't want him to forget Jimmy's chair, it's so important he holds that dear.
The works looked confusing but when Jamie explained it had three levels, I got it, what a great design. The workmen were laying steel to hold the concrete slab. I saw a bit of tradie crack but nothing that turned me on. What turned me on was when we were walking back Jamie asked me to go the other way towards the beach track, he smiled, I ran. Mitch pulled me behind a tree and had my shorts down in a split second. I wanted to kiss but he wanted to fuck. I was sore when he finished, it was so urgent, then he started kissing me. He didn't stop until he had a mouthful of my dick, which he sucked.
It was awesome and I felt wonderfully spent. He walked me back to the beach but then ran the rest of the way. He headed for the others but before he went he pointed a finger at me and said,
"Watch your back, it could happen anytime." I could hear him still laughing as I sat on the porch.
I think I know what he means; he was watching my every move waiting for his chance to pounce. It became a game for us and I think for Conner. Many times I caught sight of him and Ben heading into the bush land. If anyone else noticed they didn't say anything.
The dads didn't cook every night because the ladies auxiliary would arrive with casseroles, roasts and sausage rolls every day for the boys to warm up for dinner and lunch and there was plenty of cereal and eggs for their breakfasts. I talked to my dads again about moving downstairs and they were as pleased as punch we weren't leaving. This is a safe haven for us all, nothing much happens here. As for uni, well it's up to me to find something I'm good at but I don't really know yet.
"Psychology son, it's obvious," Squirt suggested.
"Trying to solve other people's problems, yeah right dad."
"Cody do I have to remind you how sensitive and strong you are?"
"No dad, I will look into it."
"Good boy, has Ben mentioned the money he found yet?"
"Dad how do you know about that?"
"We left it there son, the cops have rung to say he handed it in so we are giving him a two thousand dollar reward for being so honest." He laughed.
"Well he hasn't said anything more about it dad. Maybe if you want I will ask him tonight when I visit."
"Please do son, it will pay for a lot of hamburger mince."
We talked more on the psychology thing then we got onto Ayden. I told them I was a bit worried about looking after a baby so young so they suggested we both go to parenting classes. They run them at the local health center. They were excited about his arrival and had already started collecting things we would need, the container at the back of the property is being used now for baby cots and car seats.