Never Give Up

Codes you awake 8

Maxieplus.

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Mitch helped me out of the car and shut the door behind me; I didn't say anything just let him grovel for a minute or two. My dads were back on the porch, Dan was on the phone and as we walked out into the late afternoon sunshine Squirt asked Mitch,

"All sorted Mitch?"

"All fucking sorted Codes." He smiled at my dad who then asked us what we wanted for dinner. I said,

"Uncle Jamie's pizza please," and then I went to ring the bell to announce my arrival. As it turned out he was halfway through making them. I sat with Mitch and held his hand while my dads went for a run, both their asses moved in unison and I could hear Squirt's laugh from way down the beach, now what are they up to?

Conner and Ben arrived as my dads got back with quite a few bags over their arms and laughing at something Ben had said. They dumped the shopping on one of the chairs and started to go through it.

"Ben go try this on will ya, I want to see how they fit." He's so got a man crush on Ben.

"Sure buddy won't be a moment." Same from Ben's corner too.

While Ben went off to do a fashion parade for Con, the dads came back and flopped on the sofa so I went and got them both orange juice, they were laughing at each other and kissing.

"Been into the shop have you Conner? I hope you didn't clean the shelves out again," Cody mused.

"Dad I didn't clean the shelves out, I just told my mates to pick something but they went a little overboard and I couldn't tell them to stop, they were my mates, dad,and I was only ten, move on will ya."

"Yeah sure they were Conner, good mates and they are where now?" Con blushed, he had taken some school mates into dad's shop and told them to pick an outfit out when he was about ten or eleven and they took more than an outfit leaving Conner to face dad's angry words, when he was told about it. We were allowed to get things from the shop but we had to tell dad about it. Conner was too embarrassed to tell him that day but I guess his mates were happy.

Ben came out in dad's signature black hipsters and a tank top, his nipples popped out the sides and his ass was awesome. His skin was flawless, even Mitch whistled. Conner went to touch his ass when he suddenly remembered where he was, he just said he looked awesome and his dad's clothes fit him like a glove. He then said he would take him into town maybe to see a movie later so he could show off. Ben was red faced and I know in knots inside. He had his dreams, and going on a non-date with his man crush, was one of them. I hope he's not too hurt if I'm wrong.

Dad Dan was looking at me and I detected a small smile. I kinda smiled back and winked. Cody, of course, in his jet lagged state said,

"Oh are you boys going on your first date, well don't forget to ring me when you're on your way home, and Ben don't sleep in the guest room tonight, I just re-made the bed, climb in with Conner could you? Conner do you have enough money?" Ben nearly pissed himself and Conner's jaw dropped; it was so low it almost touched the floor.

"Dad it's not like that, and don't do that again, I'm sorry Ben, he oversteps the mark sometimes."

"Do what Conner? I don't know what you mean, I told you when you find someone you liked they can have a sleepover or did you forget that conversation, I barely remember it actually. I've had so many talks with you over sleepovers I forget. Did I tell you or did I forget to mention that?" He burst out laughing he couldn't help himself.

"Cody stop it." Dan screamed, laughing.

"Dad come on. Ben let's go watch some chicks on TV." Conner steered a very happy hunk towards his bedroom. I reckon while Con is watching the chicks Ben would be watching him.

Luke and Jamie arrived with dinner and Mitch went to get the men and as always they were delicious. The pizzas, not the men, but they were cool too. Jamie had installed a pizza oven down the side of the house and we often would make pizza and use it, and tonight gourmet pizzas were on the menu. The men almost fed each other as Conner wanted Ben to try a piece of each, they sat so close I couldn't help but notice the tightness in Ben's jeans.

"What have you two decided to do with the bluff Cody?" Jamie asked.

"We are going to leave it as it is Uncle Jamie, sorry your house is so awesome but we won't build it." Jamie sighed then looked at his hands, I saw sadness and a sort of loss in his face.

"So have you any other plans?" Squirt asked.

"Yes dad, we are going to buy a block of land and build. I thought Jamie could help us design a container house, I saw it on TV once and it looked awesome. I don't know where yet or even if it can be done, it's early stages and we have to save up."

"Codes can we hold off on that for awhile, I have another plan I want to talk to you about?" Mitch held my hand.

"Okay Mitch, we can talk later."

"Well a container house would be great Codes and it can be built but with the salt air I don't know if it would withstand the constant rust factor," Jamie said.

"Yeah I thought about that but it was a cheaper alternative that's all."

"Cody and Mitch you both know full well you can build anywhere on this beach and we won't charge you for the land. You can build anything that fits in with the other houses," Dan said rather forcefully.

"Thank you Dan but I'm thinking with the baby coming, we should move to Sydney," Mitch said absentmindedly; the wrong thing to say and he knew it as soon as it left his lips.

"What you're thinking of transferring to the Sydney Swans?" Dan stood up, he went to grab another piece of pizza but Squirt slapped his hand and made him sit down again.

"No Dan I can commute, oh shit I was only thinking that's all."

"You think too much Mitch, that's the problem," Ben said.

"Stay out of it Ben." Mitch shot him a stare that would cut ice.

"Okay I'll stay out of it but firstly what plans have you for Cody's life Mitch, or is all this just about a bloody baby?" Mitch went silent and I could see a tear escape.

"I'm sorry Cody I was just thinking that's all."

"It's okay Mitch we can talk later." I smiled at him rubbing his back.

"Well Mitch I think you should get your priorities right. It's my son you should think about first then your son. Don't dick my son around."

"I'm sorry everybody I was just so happy it happened and I wasn't thinking straight that's all. I love Cody and I want him to be happy firstly. Can we talk about this later, I'm getting a headache?"

"Of course Mitchell, sooner or later you're going to have to talk to someone anyway. You can't just up and transfer to another club on a whim you know." Dan was now ticked off.

"Thank you for dinner guys, I think I will hit the sack. I'm sorry everybody, it's just that all this is so new to me. I am only trying to think of everyone that's all, are you coming Codes?" He had his sorry eyes on.

"In a minute, I want to help dad clear the table, you go ahead, I won't be long, it's all okay babe." I kissed his cheek and smiled feeling his gorgeous hairy chest.

I helped clean up and Conner and Ben disappeared into Con's bedroom. He wanted Ben to try on some other piece of clothing, the date was forgotten. I watched Uncle Jamie take the trays down to his apartment and went to stand next to Luke who was deep in thought; I put my arm around his shoulder and whispered in his ear,

"You saw that didn't you?"

"Yes Codes," he answered in a whisper. I was referring to Jamie's disappointment.

"Uncle Luke let him build you his dream home, he only designed it just for you two? It seems to me everyone that lives on this beach has what they ever wanted in life and Jamie doesn't. He only wanted to build you a real home. Let him do that for you. Everyone's fine in this house and don't you think any of us would let anything happen to Squirt?"

"It's not that Cody it's just I feel like I can't leave Dan and Cody alone that's all."

"And in the meantime you made a prison for yourself and Jamie. Tell me, when was the last time you bought new furniture?" I smiled. He looked at me with tears streaming down his cheeks and said,

"Never Codes, that furniture was Cody's. The team bought it for him; I guess I've just been looking after it." The tears got stronger as I looked into his beautiful eyes then he gasped and looked like he remembered something really important.

"My Jamie, he's my absolute life, I love him so much it burns deep down inside constantly."

"Then let him build you a home Luke. Don't lock that beautiful man away in a bottom apartment. Let him look after you like he so desperately wants to. Give him that awesome bedroom he wants to share with you forever." I kissed his cheek and stroked his back.

"Thank you Codes, how you got that smart so quick is beyond me." He was smiling now.

"Maybe my gorgeous uncle had a lot to do with that."

He kissed me and moved to go downstairs.

"Luke can I talk to you for a moment?" dad Cody asked as Luke walked by.

"Not now Codes, Jamie is waiting for me." He thundered down the stairs and I heard the door close.

Dad looked at me and said,

"What happened?"

"Its all sorted dad, Luke just forgot about something for a moment, just a moment dad."

I kissed both my dads then went to bed, I have another wound to heal tonight but this helping people thing is exhausting, don't think I will be awake for long.

Mitch was still awake and was reading some footy magazine that started to appear in my room shortly after he moved in. He had the sheet pulled up and it reached just under his pecks, I so wanted to suck on them.

"You okay baby?"

"Yep good as gold babe."

I stripped slowly and gave Mitchie a bit of a show just to remind him I'm still around then I slinked into bed. Stretching my legs apart and then rolling on my side I whispered,

"Why did you want to leave me?"

"What? No! That's not what I was going to do Codes, I want you to come."

"But you know our plans Mitch, they don't include me moving to Sydney, why on earth would I want to do that?"

"I was just thinking Codes, all forgotten now, we are staying here."

"I am staying here, I know I'm not moving. I have this gorgeous man here and he wanted to build me a house to live in to go with my high profile job in the best club in the world. He wants me to babysit sometimes when we visit his son in Sydney and maybe said his son will visit us here on the most beautiful beach in the world because his mummy will be dating other guys and she may not be really interested in what Ayden's real daddy is up to." I smiled.

"Point taken Codes, can you not do that now?"

"Do what Mitchie?"

"That, that, you know, stop playing with my dick."

"But I like playing with your dick and if you stop perving on that hunks photo for more than a minute I might let you play with mine."

"Okay."

He turned in and placed it between my thighs lightly pumping while he kissed me with one of those deep ones again, of course the hunk photo was forgotten.

"Codes you still awake?"

"Umm."

"I love you Codes that was awesome."

"Umm."

"Can I go again?"

"Umm." I rolled onto my side and didn't care what he did to me tonight; I was still in raptures from the first round.

"All sorted Cody?" Dan asked in the morning.

"Yep," I answered as I snuggled into his hard body, immediately feeling safe.

"Don't be too hard on Mitch dad, he's new to all this and hasn't realized as a couple we have to make decisions about the directions we want to take in our lives together. He's trying to do it all on his own, so can you not be angry with him?"

"I'm not angry with him Cody, I love him and I know what he's going through, but promise me if it gets to the stage he wants to be in the baby's life more, then talk to me. I don't want it to get to the stage where you are forgotten about. I have seen the results of that before and it wasn't pretty. The regrets were with the guy involved for years and still are. How I could have treated Cody like that is beyond me. I regret it every day and I don't want you and Mitch to go through it." He had slipped up but I know there is more to my dad's stories than I know; I will slowly get the full picture one day.

"I won't let it get to that stage dad. I promise you."

Luke and Jamie came up and Cody brought toast and eggs out then yelled for Conner to get up. Two sleepy guys came out in their boxer shorts, Ben scratched his balls and Conner watched. I leaned over and whispered into Ben's ear,

"I bet you are about ready to bust a nut, no hands by now?" He nodded taking a deep breath.

"That was a nightmare, I got no sleep at all," he sighed.

I laughed as Mitch caught my eye; he had slipped through the sliding door in his boxers. I immediately got a full feeling downstairs.

I noted Uncle Luke and Jamie were smiling and acting like school kids whispering in each other's ears and blushing, why couldn't Luke see it for all those years, I could?

"I'm selling the practice Dan."

"What!" Dad nearly fell off his seat, his coffee spilling onto his robe.

"Well it's all getting too much for me to handle and it's worth quite a lot of money to us, I'm going into private practice. I can set up a consultation room at the new house." He looked at me and mouthed a thank you.

"What the fuck are you talking about Luke? Sometimes I think you're sniffing your own iodine," Cody said, with a giggle.

"James over to you." Luke presented Jamie with his hands.

Jamie took my hand and squeezed it for a moment that said it all.

"We are going to build our house on the bluff. Mitch, we won't disturb Jimmy's chair at all. If I have to shift the house position to accommodate it then I will, but at the moment it's not going to disturb it. The house should take about six months to build and the downstairs apartment will make a great day surgery for doctor Lawrence here, not doctor Rosano because we are not married yet." He laughed so much I thought the chair was going to fall from beneath him.

"About time, I thought we would never get rid of you," Cody joked.

"Well Squirt I have a big job for you in the next six months. You take my good husband here shopping for his brand new house. He needs brand new furniture and appliances. You get to spend some money Codes, goody, goody." Jamie rubbed his hands together. He was so happy, I hardly ever see Jamie laugh. I don't know why because it's a beautiful one and his smile is just to die for. I winked at Luke and he winked back smiling just as much as Jamie. It was good news all round. Cody's phone rang and he handed it to Jamie.

"Mum, but mum, I asked him to marry me years ago."

"But mum, he's not a virgin, he can't wear white."

"Mum stop it, he doesn't whine."

"Got to go mum, Luke, she wants to talk to you." Laughing he handed the phone over to Luke.

"Mum, no mum, I don't whine, no I won't mum. I'll be good to Jamie, yes mum; I've got clean underwear on." On and on it went until he hung up on nana. She will do herself some damage one day. Mitch was in fits and Ben was just horny because Conner had stood up and slapped Jamie's hand. His bum was shaking in Ben's face, the poor man. I found out later while the announcement was being made Squirt had messaged nana. I suppose she sits at the kitchen table waiting, phone in hand for any news, must go there again soon, she's a human Wikipedia.

"Well Codes and Mitch you can move into the apartment after we move out." Jamie smiled.

"No, I was thinking we might..." That's all Mitch got out before a rousing.

"Mitch stop thinking," came from everybody.

"Umm sorry Codes." He sat down and buried his face in his hands. I rubbed his back.

After breakfast he had to go help his dad in the nursery.He had gotten in the habit of doing this and having morning tea with him sometimes. I kissed him farewell then went to make the bed and clean the bathroom. I have work tomorrow so want to talk to dad Codes about something that was coming up. Just as I threw the doona cover up to straighten it, Conner came in and flopped on it, he was deep in thought.

"Where's Ben?"

"He had to go to work."

"What type of work does he do?"

"He runs a bistro in the city, he's the floor walker and makes sure everything runs as smooth as silk, good job actually, he gets to meet heaps of chicks."

I smiled at him then thought why not? I flopped down beside him and he turned in facing me with his hand playing with the buttons on my polo shirt.

"Do you think Ben's got the hot's for me Cody?"

I smiled and nodded yes.

"What do I do?"

"Let him off the hook Conner. He's going crazy hanging around with you, he's so in love it's hurting him so don't lead him on. Con, that's so not fair on him."

"Do you think he's in love with me?"

"Yes Con, definitely."

"Oh." He was deep in thought.

"Okay enough Con, tell him you love him and get it over and done with. You can't hurt yourself like this, be true to your feelings and just fucking tell him."

"I don't want to be gay Codes, that's your job."

"Then don't be, just be a kind loving human being that loves Ben to bits. There's nothing wrong with that, don't put a label on it." I maybe said too much.

He kissed my cheek and bounced up on the bed deliberately destroying my perfectly tucked in sheets then left. I stayed there for a few minutes then got up, my shirt had fallen open and my jeans were falling down. Conner had undone all my buttons. "You little shit, just tell him," I muttered under my breath.

I helped Cody vacuum the family room and then we had morning tea. There was no one in sight so I took the opportunity to talk to him about work. Grabbing my briefcase I placed two pages in front of him, he looked them over and then he took my hand.

"Which proposal do you like the best baby?"

"I like them both dad, I just did it for an exercise blah, blah, blah but wanted your opinion whether it's worth running it by the secretary that's all, blah, blah." I smirked at him.

"Well number two is the best, can you leave them with me, I have a thought about the bar that's all." He smirked back.

"Okay dad, but you don't have to do it if you don't want to." I smiled.

"Oh but I do son, I do." Grinning from ear to ear.

"Now what's happening with Mitch?'

"Oh dad he's just trying too hard to please everybody that's all. Belinda doesn't need his help but he thinks he has to so I will let him go to Sydney for a few days, but he knows in the future he has to run things by me."

"As long as you are happy Cody, that's all I want."

"I am dad."

"What did you do to my Lukey too, while we are at it?"

"I reminded him he wasn't your Lukey, he was Jamie's Lukey and that prison he was hold up in took the smiles off Uncle Jamie's face. He should let him build the house he designed for them, just for them dad."

He was reflective and again he took my hand.

"It was Luke's choice Cody, we wanted them to build the house but when Jamie said they would stay in the flat. We thought they were happy and they were for a lot of years but I have noticed Jamie's laughter had disappeared yet I still thought everything was normal. I thank you, my son, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for what you did for my best friends. I love you so much Codes." He smiled then kissed me. I had no answer at all, the connection Luke and Cody have is real and I didn't want to say the wrong thing so I left it alone. It was dad that went on,

"Years ago I wasn't very well. I had some boyfriend trouble and was attacked viciously. The pills I was taking were giving me nightmares and I was hallucinating every time I took one. They were supposed to make me calm down. On one of Dan's footy trips away very early in our relationship, Luke and Mike stayed in my old apartment your dad had bought off me after that bad thing happened in it." He had tears in his eyes.

"I took a pill one night to sleep but when I got into bed there was a small present in it, it was from Luke. I opened it and he had bought me my little heart with, 'Never give up Cody,' written on it. At the time I thought it was the most beautiful thing in the world and it still is." He played with his little heart as he talked.

"I reacted badly to the pills and had an unreal panic attack. I knew I would fit violently and baby I saw your father being thrown from the balcony, his head hit the concrete much like your dream about Mitch. I managed to call Luke to help me, he stayed with me all night and made sure I was safe then the next day he got me to the doctor's. He had already worked out it was my pills that were almost killing me." He stopped.

"Dad I didn't know that, it explains a lot but dad I know I have known for a long time about the abuse." I hung my head.

"What do you know?" He was surprised I knew anything.

"Dad don't be mad, it wasn't our fault, Conner and I were short sheeting Don and Tim's bed and we found a letter tied up with a blue ribbon. We were about thirteen at the time and we were ashamed we read it and promised we wouldn't say anything, so I know dad. I also know you're safe now and nobody's going to hurt you anymore." I took him in my arms and he wept.

I whispered to him I would forever try to better everybody's lives around me in thanks for sending Conner and me the perfect parents.

"I'm sorry Codes, we didn't want to hurt you with an old story, we were protecting you but it looks like you were protecting us after all."

"We made a pact to always try to be happy around you both and it wasn't a hard promise to keep dad, we loved you both so much."

"Well that may explain why Uncle Luke was very much against going too far away from us. He is my healer and Dan is my savior, they both love me so much. I absolutely adore them but not as much as you, you're my favorite." He winked then sort of laughed, I guess trying to lift the mood. I looked into his now bright red, green eyes and thought, you fucking heart breaker. If you looked any more gorgeous in your youth than you do now you would be bordering on angelic. Of course I've seen thousands of photos of him and he still looks the same today.

"Now I like your idea and I want you to show Mr. Aslan as soon as possible when I'm done with it, I don't know why I didn't think of it myself." He laughed.

"Everything all right out here Codes?" Dan poked his head out.

"Yes handsome man, all's good," Cody answered.

"Coffee, I need coffee, Dan," he added.

"Coming up Squirt."

Dad had explained why Luke was so resistant in leaving him alone, that night had not only affected Cody, it had a profound effect on Uncle Luke who probably found it hard to leave behind.

I felt a little lonely and so I decided to go see my hard working man at the garden center. Pulling into the car park I saw him working his little tush off down the back gardens. I spoke to Mike for awhile until a customer came in then I went to find Mitch.

"Hi Codes, what brings you here?"

"Oh I just missed you, that's all, so thought I might visit. Have you had lunch yet?"

"No, dad said he would go get some pies or something."

`Okay that's cool, what are you doin?"

"Seeding in the hot house, coming?"

I followed him into the seedling shed where he was as quick as lightening, locking the door behind us and he had my shorts down within seconds then he had his liquid lunch.I returned the favor and it wasn't long before he seeded me.

We walked up to the front office and Mitch's dad took off to get lunch while we looked after the shop.

"Codes I am sorry for not telling you about Sydney. I can cancel the ticket still. Belinda doesn't need me there, she's pretty independent Codes, so it's no biggie."

"Mitch go and see little Ayden, it's your right as a father to be there and you should be involved. Just tell me next time. I hate surprises and maybe I can come with you for the next one." I smiled.

I'm over it, I can't think about it anymore and I have to go cheer up my dads and poor Ben; Conner's such a cock teaser sometimes. Lunch was a pie and sauce and we talked about the baby for awhile. Mitch kissed me and I left. I swung by the bank and asked about joint accounts for housing telling the girl a mate and I were going into business and wanted to open a joint account. She gave me all the relevant information and with that in hand I returned home. Conner was out the front when I pulled in and looked a little agitated when he jumped in the passenger side.

"Codes can you drive me to Brisbane? Ben wants me to pick my car up; he's got a double shift and wants to stay at his place tonight."

"Sure Conner but can you drive I don't know the way to his house?"

We swapped places and Con carefully pointed my car towards the freeway. He didn't seem too happy and I did think twice about him driving but he was careful and within a half hour he was pulling into Ben's drive.

"Thanks Codes, I'll go get the keys and follow you home."

"Okay." He knocked on the door and I assume Ben's mum answered it and handed over the keys. They spoke for a few minutes then Conner jumped in and he started to follow me home. Halfway there he pulled off the freeway, I couldn't follow him but I'm sure he had his reasons.

When I got home again, there was of course no sign of him but I did see Trent and Tom walking down the path. They were home finally and it was good to see them, someone familiar and a part of our babysitting team. Many a time Conner and I found refuge in their house, hiding from Cody or Dan when they got mad at us. Of course they knew where we were.Nothing on the beach went unseen; it was too dangerous to have us kids out on our own. I am sure the dads had an intercom going from house to house, or maybe smoke signals?

Bobby's and Rory's was the best to go to because they had drinks and biscuits waiting on their porch for us every time we ran away. They would sit and talk to us until we were ready to go home. So many good memories of a happy childhood, when did it get so complicated? It seems everyday something new and adult comes up in my life. I was happy to stay just a kid, no pressure. I walked down the side of the house and ended up on the log on the beach looking out to the blue ocean. I tried counting the white tops on the waves and each time I increased my speed and counted more and more, a silly kid's game I had forgotten about.

After a half hour I brushed myself down and started for the stairs that will take me to our verandah. Dan was there on his own, he said they had just had a nap and Cody was showering, then he pulled me down on his knees.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing dad, I was just playing count the white tops and wondering when was the time I changed from being a happy kid to a not so happy adult? No, let me re-phrase that, a happy adult without a kid's no fear attitude."

"Codes you're still a happy carefree kid inside, we never lose that. It's just recently you have gone from being single to almost married within months and you are trying to set up a home with Mitch. The baby has thrown your plans into overdrive and you somehow feel a little sad for a few people around you. There's a lot of things in there you didn't have a year ago, well most of it anyway and I want you to know I have Cody's back. I always did and I always will. I adore him so I'm not going to let anyone hurt him again." He pulled me closer and hugged me tight. I loved it when he did that as my worries disappeared for a moment and mostly that's all I need is just a moment with my dad, no pressure, more smells.

"Codes what time are you going to work tomorrow?" dad asked.

"I have to be there at nine dad, we've got your Country Women's Association in again, so an early start and finish."

"Well when they offer scone lessons, take them. Aunty Annie and I had so much fun that day. We were old hands when the time came to go home, I hadn't laughed so much for ages."

"I will Squirt, anyone you want me to say hello to?"

"Nah, they wouldn't remember me, I was one of ten that day and we had our lessons."

"Okay dad, they won't remember you." I smirked.