Note: When I wrote and published my story here first, about eight years ago, I wasn't totally honest. Billy wasn't my friend's brother, he was MY brother. And there was more to it than I said. Several dozen people wrote to me afterwards who liked the story, and some asked me for more, but I put them off, telling them that was all there was. I couldn't admit my final degradation, and also didn't have the insight then to realize fully what was happening. For that I apologize, and offer this account as honestly as I can.
My Submission to Billy
I always felt trapped between Billy's cocky contempt and my mother's brainless snickering. The day Billy finally got his way, I'd walked into the basement where Mom was emptying the washing machine, and saw her take out couple of pair of Billy's snow-white underpants.I knew they were Billy's because he always insisted on white briefs with a wide band stiped in blue and red at the waist. Mom always seemed to be buying him new underwear, whereas I was always imprisoned in dingy grey boxers. I nearly tripped over a barbell belonging to Billy on the floor and I tried to lift it to impress Mom, but strain as I did, I just couldn't lift it above my knees. . Just then, Billy, barreled into the basement and saw what was happening. He braced, gripped and pressed the bar above his head and teased me about the fact that I couldn't move it. Mom giggled. I had no choice but to take another shot at it, with the same humiliating result. As I crashed the weights down from all of ten inches, Billy came over to me and grabbed me in a bear hug from behind, trapping my arms at my side. My arms were tired from the exertion, and I had no strength left to fight him off. Mom laughed and told Billy to leave me alone, and he let me go, but gave me a big push with both arms square in my back, catching me unaware and off-balance, and I went sprawling face-first to the floor with my head in a pile of soiled clothes that Mum was about to put in the machine. I thought Mom might remonstrate with Billy, but she just gave her usual tinkling laugh. And I lay there feeling defeated for a moment and looked up at Billy as he strode on past me. Billy was a couple inches shorter than me, and probably weighed 10 pounds less than me, being two years younger. But he was arrogant and knew that he was tougher than me. He was good-looking, with a short neck and the sort of face you might expect in later years to stare out in a bone-headed way from under a miltary cap, rigid with stupid pride as he saluted the unfortunate dead of some discredited campaign,. Mom always doted on him, and thought nothing of driving him to soccer or baseball half a dozen times a week, whereas she always acted grumpy about taking me to my weekly chess club..
I walked out into the yard, and Billy followed me five minutes later. Without any lead-up, told me he thought he could beat me at wrestling. I was riled with Billy and my pride got the better of me. I said I could take him with my hands tied behind my back. Billy was quick to take me up on this ridiculous idea, and we went into the barn which had belonged to the farm on the land our house was built on. Billy found a leather strap in a box of old harness pieces, and bound my hands tightly behind my back. I got an odd tingle when he did this. I guess it was because I realized I was now totally at his mercy. What had I done? Billy just pushed me over onto the ground, in the old straw and shavings, and he proceeded to sit triumphantly astride my chest and slap my face, and taunt me with how helpless I was now as he sat straddled atop me. It was uncomfortable with wrists tied underneath me, and Billy sat very erect and cocky with his knees pinning my shoulders. He put the flat of one hand over my mouth and pinched my nose with the other to cut off my breath supply and demonstrate his power over me. From below, as I stared up, his features were foreshortened so that his nose looked blunt and fleshy and his lips were puffed and arrogant. When he let me breathe again, I pleaded with him to let me go, but already I knew we had entered into the final episode of a fraught game that had been going on ever since two months ago, about the time Billy hit twelve years of age, and Billy knew it too. After 10 minutes of my pitiful begging he decided to let me go. "How about if I tie your ankles this time and we try again?" he said arrogantly, before agreeing to get off me.
I had no option but to agree.. Same result... He was quickly on top of me and pinned me down, sitting up on my chest, and grinding my forearms down with his knees. At first he held my wrists down too, but he soon saw there was no need for this, and sat back with his hands on his hips, free to harass me. And that he did. He pinched my ears, nose and lips, Nothing too bad or painful. It was just humiliating having my younger brother beating me up. But it was wonderful too, in a way I couldn't explain. I wanted to stop this feeling, but it was impossible now for my mind to halt what my body had already surrendered to. I had resisted Billy for two months, night after night, but with a growing feeling that my body was taking me places my mind could do nothing about. This time Billy slapped me quite hard, rocking my head from side to side with a quick one-two. He stared down at me, gripping my chin and making me stare up into his eyes. I felt an extraordinary sliding sensation, as though my spirit was passing out of my body, and felt that Billy, with total confidence, was finally making himself my complete master.
Billy told me that things weren't finished yet and I had to try fighting him one last time, without being tied at all. So he climbed off me and untied my ankles. This time it should have been a much more even contest, and I don't know if I could have matched him, or even won if I'd tried harder. Probably not, but all I know is I ended up twenty seconds later, flat on my back, looking up into his gloating eyes, getting my face pinched and slapped again, with Billy sitting triumphantly astride me. His face was now red and swollen with victory. He knew I was totally defeated and I gave up any resistance and I knew that my surrender was complete. Billy knew it even before I did.
"Please, Billy?" I begged.
"Please what?"
My throat felt too thick to reply. What could I say? . Let me up? But I didn't want him to get off me, I was all too conscious of the physical fact of his legs straddling me and of his firm buttocks pressing down on my chest. There was a buzzing in my ears and I felt incredibly alive. With my younger brother established so firmly and victoriously astride me, I felt, to my utter disbelief, a part of me, a slave self I had never acknowledged before, go deeper and deeper into a delicious state of absolute submission... I knew I was going nowhere without Billy's permission. He could see it in my eyes. He knew everything I knew and he also knew the rules of the game we were playing now, and how it must now be actred out. It was so simple, really. I was to beg him for mercy, and he was to refuse, thus gratifying his triumph and pandering to my perverse delight in my utter subjection to him. And so I begged and pleaded. And Billy slapped me, and pinched my nose, and stuck his thumbs into my mouth and pulled the sides of my lips painfully apart. He was plainly determined to take full advantage of his dominant position, and made me open my mouth while he released a string of slow, dangling spits of saliva which gleamed in the light coming through the slats of the barn. And I was made to take it, and savor and swallow it. Then he made me thank him for permission to drink his spit.
He eventually got bored with this, and I figured he would let me up. But I was wrong. Billy grunted, then lifted a moment, rolled me over and, sitting astride my back, tied my wrists firmly behind me again. He got off me and started prowling round the barn, checking the things hanging on nails along the wooden wall. He found what he wanted, hanging between an ancient, cruel looking pair of cattle testicle-crushers and a couple of rusted rat traps. . He came back, carrying an abandoned dog collar and leash and he sat down astride my back again, and fitted and buckled the leash snugly around my throat, humming softly to himself like a craftsman going about his goodly work, then snapped the catch of the leash into the heavy steel ring of the collar.
Then Billy pulled me roughly to my feet and led me back to the house, back down to the basement, occasionally slapping me if he though I didn't do as he said. Mom was coming down the stairs with some more laundry, and when she saw my situation she laughed and asked what on earth was going on. Billy told her I had just lost a wrestling match to him and I was 'paying my dues'. She just laughed her high, airhead laugh, then watched for a moment, as he pulled me around some more, then she smiled and started emptying the machine of freshly washed clothes, filling it again from her basket of bras and panties and other things belonging to my elder sister and herself. She was .chuckling to herself in a delighted, idiotic way.. I was only too aware that I could have begged Mom to make Billy let me go, and break out of this shame into which I was descending. She would probably have done so. But I couldn't risk it. It was then that I realized I was totally captured by my desire to be mastered by Billy and to obey his every command. My submission to Billy was now unquestionable.
Billy and I shared a bedroom, but Billy also had a room in the basement where he studied, built his model airplanes and kept his computer. It was sometimes used as a guestroom, and had a desk and swivel-chair and a sofa bed there. An old clock, that had belonged to our grandmother, tocked away in a corner. .Billy had hung an American flag hung on the wall, and all along the back of the desk were model soldiers from every part of our history, brightly painted in authentic colors over the years by Billy. There was a partly completed model in balsawood of a B29 bomber on the desk, and the place was full of the strong petro- chemical smell of model adhesive. I had , of course, resigned myself to Billy's domination, and, when he had me in the room, he locked the door. He ordered me to sit on his bed, and I had no choice but to comply, with my wrists still tied behind my back. Sitting on the edge of his bed, he pushed me onto my back and sat beside me. "Let's see what the wimp has inside his pants" Billy said I was wearing gabardine shorts , and he put his fingers into the elastic waistband and pulled down my shorts and underwear, in one quick motion, down to my knees. My penis was partially erect, and adding to my shame and embarrassment was the fact that I was fairly small -- about 4 inches. He took one look at my cock and gave a little sarcastic laugh. He didn't touch it, though, but went to the desk and took up the model airplane and then lifted a tube of airplane glue Billy squeezed out a bright globule of glue from the fat tube, and smeared it along the inside of the airplane's wing, then held the model carefully in place, squinting along it to make sure the wing was carefully aligned. Billy was very meticulous in everything he did, in planning and execution. When he was satisfied he rested the plane on the desk for the glue to harden.
He came over to the bed and straddled me so he was again sitting on my chest. I was defenseless to stop him. Then he did something that has been burned into my memory ever since. He unzipped his pants, pulled them down a bit and pulled out his cock. Even though he was only twelve, his cock was bigger than mine! And he had just as much hair. I may have been sort of a late bloomer, but Billy was incredibly developed for his age. His adolescent cock and dangling ball sac were just inches from my face and his penis was pulsing to a full erection right before my eyes. In seconds it was completely hard - 6 inches of handsome, rigid male muscle. Then he said "you want to suck this, don't you?" I was in total shock. I had resigned myself to the humiliation of being dominated by Billy, but this came as a total surprise. He held his cock in his hand and touched it to my lips. I turned my head away.
"I'm waiting for an answer," he said.
Yes," I said, "Yes, I will"
"I will, Sir," he commanded.
"I will, Sir," I said feebly.
I struggled weakly beneath him but the exertion and the sight and smell of Billy's hard-on was starting to have an effect on me. I was getting even more aroused! Then he grabbed the back of my head and pulled my face into his crotch and rubbed his dick on my face and ordered me to lick it. After a minute of trying to avoid the inevitable, I opened my mouth and my tongue came out and I nervously licked the shaft of his penis. He guided me up and down the shaft and then ordered me to lick his balls. My tongue lapped at the soft skin and traced the contours of his sizeable nuts which were by now swollen like shapely plums inside the sac. Still holding my head and controlling its movement, he brought my mouth back to his cock.
"Time to suck me, Scotty boy" he said forcefully.
His breathing was becoming deeper with excitement, and his cock throbbed right in front of my face. He let go of my head and placed the head of his cock at my lips. This time I didn't resist. My lips opened and wrapped around the flared cock head as my tongue lapped at the smooth hot flesh. For the first time in my life, I was sucking a cock. I had no idea why I was suddenly submitting like this to Billy. I had resisted his advances for three months, and I didn't even like him. But that only added piquancy to my situation. He pushed his cock in firmly, filling my mouth and touching the back of my throat, then withdrawing slightly, then pushing in again. I felt I was getting even more excited sucking him than he was at being sucked. As he pumped his cock into my mouth, his breathing got deeper and he kept repeating "you're a good cocksucker, you ARE a good cocksucker". My own cock felt almost as hard as I tried to grind my crotch up into his jeans to rub against him, but his buttocks were out of reach. If my hands had not been tied behind me, I would have been jacking myself off in urgent strokes. But the deprivation was exquisite beyond belief. I had never been so aroused in my life before, not even when I masturbated first, overwhelmed by the first dry throbbing of my young cock.
Billy couldn't resist a bit of further bullying and he pulled his cock out and started cock-slapping my face, while I tried to interrupt his cock with my tongue and slaver it back into my mouth. I guessed that, at twelve, Billy wouldn't be able to "shoot" and I know that I certainly didn't at that age, and even now my cum almost needed crutches to get itself out when I jacked off.
"Oh yeah! Do it cocksucker! Yeah; here it cums!"
Billy's breath came in faster and faster gasps. His whole body stiffened, and an astonishing blast of cum exploded into my mouth. It seemed like he'd never stop shooting, and I tried my best to swallow his load without choking. He kept his cock in my mouth mouth for about three minutes and made me milk him almost dry. When he was fully satisfied, he pulled his cock out of my mouth but kept his crotch pressed against my face as he leaned against the arm of the sofabed and tried to catch his breath. I continued to lick his penis, and my own modest boner also begged impotently for attention. Then he sat back right on my cock as he inspected his own still-large member to see if I had cleaned it sufficiently, then tucked it back in his pants. If I thought he might give me some sexual relief, I was wrong.
Billy got off me and sat in his swivel chair, leaving me lying helpless on the bed, savoring his cum in my mouth. I'm sure he had to notice my erect little 4-inch penis, but he didn't say a word about it. Since Billy turned twelve he had been gunning for me. He would sometimes climb down from the top bunk at night and make me lie on my face, then lie on top of me, with his legs on either side of mine. Sometimes he put his hand under and twisted my nuts, but he had also kissed the back of my neck, and my nape and cheek. Always, his erect penis had lain in the hollow where my spine was, but in the last week he had moved it down so it lay plumped between the cheeks of my buttocks. Billy had never jerked off on me, and told me he was practicing "military discipline" but whether it was control over his own body, or over me he never made clear. Now I knew it must be both.
"Tonight," Billy said, "when I come to bed I want you to be on your knees on the lower bunk, with your butt in the air. Got that?"
"Yes, Sir," I said meekly.
"You'll already have put your arms behind your back so I can grip your wrists," Billy said. "I may hold you by the hair or the ears instead."
"Yes, Sir."
"I dunno at this stage. Anyway, I've never actually fucked anyone in the ass before, have I?" Billy mused. " Think I can do it, big bro?"
"Yes, Sir," I said, astonished to hear this talk from a twelve-year old.
"You bet! I'm gonna bust your ass tonight, big bro," Billy said, "and after that you're gonna be ready for me every night, whether I want you or not. Got it?"
"Yessir," I said.
"I'll be here at home at least until I'm eighteen, I guess," Billy mused. "So you can look forward to about six years of being my bitch. Think you can handle that?"
In answer, I struggled off the bed and knelt before him in total surrender to his wishes. Before I left the room Billy let me suck him off again, this time on my knees on the floor, and this time I did it greedily and willingly, to demonstrate my submission to him and to show that I was, indeed, his willing bitch.
To be continued...