My Straight Friend: Chapter 5
By FM Htown
This story is 50% factual and 50% fiction. Some names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of individuals. This story is mine, please do not copy/replicate any/all parts of it.
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We never discussed nor talked about what happened in his apartment. We stopped talking for a while. He proposed to his girlfriend Alicia when he went to see her. He posted pictures on his Facebook and announced his engagement to her. Everyone was happy for them, as was I but felt sad cause I knew what this meant for me. I knew that this was the last time that I will ever get a chance to spent time with him ever again. My emotions ran wild in my head and in my heart. I told myself that we were never going to be a couple, we never were an item, it was just an instance in time where my dream was fulfilled.
I saw him at the office, he ignored me. I called him, and he wouldn't pick up the phone even when it was business related. I had to have my boss call him to tell him I needed to speak to him about a tech. I called him again and he picked up, I said to him "hey Matthew this tech...", he cut me off quickly with a "send the call over" that was it. I knew this was not going to end well. This went on for several months, he ignored my calls, my texts, my calls at work as well. I didn't want to feel this way like I pushed him away, like I made him this way. I got up and went outside and cried like a girl. WHY WHY WHY did you push him for that, you fucked up this friendship this bond that we had together for what, for his dick. Was it worth it?
As his wedding day came closer and closer he was still very distant with me, but I still played it cool at the office and tried not to bring up any suspicions that we weren't talking. I caught him in the break room getting some chips from the vending machine. He was talking to Brian about a job site, "hey Matthew. Hey Brian. How's your day going?" Brian responded with "Is it 5 already these fucking techs are driving me nuts about these sites. Ugh!!" And Matthew simply replied with "it's going" that was it.
I got a text message from Matthew a month before his wedding with a simple "send me address so I can send you invitation", I Sent him my address and that was it. I knew I had to make a tough decision and I didn't want to do it. I was happy that he found the love of his life and that it was Alicia. She really is a nice girl. Nice smile, great head on her shoulders, strong, and madly in love with Matthew. I couldn't believe that she planned the entire wedding by herself with the time she had.
I reached out to Alicia on Facebook. She accepted my friend request and read my message "Alicia. My name is Francisco I work with Matthew. I just wanted to congratulate you on almost tying the knot. Lol. I hope you and Matthew have a happy life and fulfill all y'all dreams together as husband and wife. Matthew wouldn't stop talking about his soon to be wife at all, he loves you so much. I can't wait to meet you and have a great time at your wedding. Your friend Francisco"
"Why did you send a friend request to Alicia" was the text he sent me. "What did you tell her?" "Answer me asshole". I ignored his messages that day. I ignored him at work as well. I asked to be trained with the techs onsite for a few weeks as I focused on my life now. I didn't see or heard from Matthew for a few weeks. I was just now starting to let go of him, releasing my emotions of him and just wanting on being a better person for myself.
Alicia and I continued to communicate. She talked about her wedding plans, her Honeymoon destination, the house that Matthew just got. She was ready to become Mrs. Wilson. Out of the blue Alicia asked me "why is Matthew angry at you? Every time I mention your name he just gets mad?" I didn't know what to say, she looked at me waiting for an answer and I just said "have you asked him? I don't think he would like for me to be talking about him like this..." "please tell me, he just walks away when I ask him or even bring up your name. I need to know." "Alicia you need to know that Matthew is an awesome dude that just have some self-esteem issues. Maybe it's something that he has struggled with in his teen years or maybe it's something that he just stated dealing with I'm not entirely sure. Sometimes he thinks he is too skinny or doesn't have enough muscles in his arms or his chest. He always talks about you Alicia, you can see the happiness you bring him and that's all that really matters in my book. He shouldn't have to worry about how he looks in clothes or his appearance with you, you guys are perfect for each other." I look at Alicia as her eyes glistened, I think she wanted to cry but shows restraint. "You are right, now I see why he talked about you. He is really lucky to have you as a friend." Deep down inside of me I was hurting at the words she was saying, if she only knew how I really felt for Matthew, she would smack me in my face. I don't have my best friend anymore, but he has found something better... A new soulmate, best friend, lover, wife. Something that I could never be.
Matthew and Alicia's nuptials were beautiful. You can tell that they really love each other. Alicia looked so beautiful in her wedding dress and Matthew looked sexy in his black suit. It was the suit that we both picked out at the men's warehouse. We knew that it would show off all his assets for that day. Everyone was happy for the new couple. We all drove to the hall where the party would be at. I haven't talked to Matthew about anything and I knew I probably wouldn't talk to him ever again. They had their dance together, they looked so cute dancing together even though I knew Matthew didn't like dancing. About 11:15 pm Matthew notices me sitting at a table by myself drinking. He walks up to me and says, "having fun?" I looked up at him and smiled "I sure am. Congrats man I wish you the very best." "Thanks buddy that means a lot to me. I'm sorry for acting like a jerk to you after well you know. I haven't been a good friend and I'm sorry." I had tears running down my face it was nice hearing his voice "Matthew sit down please". "Alicia told me that y'all talked. She told me what you said about my self-esteem. You we're right, you are always right about me."
I looked in his eyes and took a deep breath trembling at what I was going to tell him. It needed to be said, I needed to get it out of my system. I didn't want to hurt him, I didn't want to hurt a person that I cared for so deeply and loved more than life itself. "Matthew I'm sorry for that night, I didn't think about your feelings or how it would make you feel. It was never about trying to score with my straight friend or trying to turn you gay. It was an experience that I will cherish forever. You trust me and invited me into a place that you rarely let others come into, your heart. But you have someone now that you can really bare your soul and mind to and that's Alicia." Matthew looked at me puzzled not sure what I was trying to say, "wha what are you saying, you sound like if you are dying or something?" I sighed looked down and looked at his face and said "I cannot keep this charade anymore. I'm sorry Matthew but I think this is where we need to part ways. I love you, I've loved you for a while now, but you have Alicia now and she needs you to be her rock now. I was stupid enough to think that one day maybe we could be together, but I had to face the reality that a straight man cannot be turned gay. I'm not that great I don't have powers" I chuckled at that. "Thank you for your friendship, our time together, and for always being there for me like a true fake bf", I got up from my chair and he raised from his chair, I walked close to him and embraced him in a tight hug. "Frankie please don't do this, we can still be friends". "it's not the same anymore at least for me, I can't live in a fantasy world. Take care of yourself and Alicia." He gave me a kiss on the cheek as I backed away from him, I could see the tears on his face as he saw the tears in my face. I turned around and headed for the door, not turning back just raised my hand and gestured goodbye.
Tell me what you think guys.... Should I end the story or should I continue it? I still have some true stories left in me to continue with a few more chapters. Also feel free to send me your questions at the email listed above.