My Adam

My Adam Chapter 4

I just wanted to thank everyone who's been following the story. I know that it took me a while to get chapter 3 out but I guess it was worth it. Besides, this is part of a writer's life sometimes you wake up and you can't write for shit. Well, that's that. I hope you have enjoyed the story so far, there is much more to come. I did not outline this story, which means that I, myself, don't even know what is to come. I want to have the same surprises and revelations as you do. I know, though, that Adam and Vinny, should be together. I know that is what you want it to happen too, but how will they do that? And what will happen until they find their happy ending? And I guess the most important question is are they going to have a happy ending? After all, this story is reality based and sometimes life's ending isn't always a happy one.

Chapter 4

"Hello" It was Adam

"Hello?" He asked again since I hadn't answer

"Adam! Adam it's me!! Please don't hang up."

"Vinny? Is it you?"

"I need to see you."

"Vinny I have some files to go over I don't kn..."

"Adam it's important."

"I have to be at the office tomorrow really early, maybe some other tim..."

"Adam please."

"Okay, where do you want meet?"

"I'm driving right now, tell me where you live and I drive over there."

"Vinny I don't know if it is a good idea for you to come over now, why don't you..."

"Adam I don't even need to go inside, if you want we can even stay in the car or I could maybe drive somewhere, ... it doesn't matter! I just know I need to see you tonight."

He paused, didn't say anything for like a awhile but I knew he was there I could hear him breathing.

"Adam..."

"Do you know Brookline at all?"

"Yeah." After a sigh of relief that he agree to go meet me

"I live right off Harvard Avenue."

"Where on it?"

"Which way are you coming?"

"I'm on Huntington Ave., by Symphony Hall.

"Before the Blockbuster and the Stop & Shop take a right. That will be Sumner Street. Take you first left, which will put you on the Prescott Street I live on the number 25.

"Okay, I will be there in 15."

Click!

He hung up the phone before saying good-bye, before I could even say good-bye. What was I doing? Adam didn't want to talk to me, perhaps I shouldn't go to his house after all. Yes, I should . I not only should, but I needed to. I wanted to. Honestly, it didn't matter to me if he didn't want to see me, I was going to his place and he was going to have to hear me out. Traffic wasn't bad so I was getting there pretty okay.  I took a right off Huntington Ave. onto Harvard Ave. I drove a few blocks, while driving I noticed how deserted but still family-like Brookline was. There weren't that many people on the street, after all is was amolst 10:30 but the few that were, were elders making their way home, late night runners, people in the robes and slippers walking out their dogs. So different from what downtown Boston is like. It was still cozy, there was something about it that appealed to me. I soon saw the Blockbusters ahead. It was right on the corner between Harvard and Prescott. I took a right and drove a little slower I didn't want to miss the number. I was driving and looking when I spotted someone sitting on the steps of a pretty lavender two families house. There was parking right across the street. Before I parked I stopped right in front of it and looked at the guy sitting on the steps. He was illuminated by the porch light. He was sitting on the steps, with his head down on his knees. He had on light gray sweat pants and slippers; a white snug ribbed tank top, a charcoal gray winter cap and open wool coat. While I was parking, he lifted his head and saw me. I parked the car and got out. I crossed the street and stood right in front of him. He was just looking at me, and I was looking at him. His eyes were different this time. There wasn't in warmth and passion in them. There were coldly looking straight at me . Asking, demanding to know why, why was I there?

"You look so beautiful." I said at first, because that's how I saw him at the moment.

"So what was it that you couldn't until tomorrow to talk to me about?" He said harshly, I guess I deserved that.

"I wanted to see if you were okay." I said softly sitting next to him

"I am fine. But you didn't come here to see if I was fine, did you?" He asked me that looking right into my eyes.

"I..." He didn't even let me finish

"I mean I could've told you that on the phone." He said looking straight ahead ignoring my presence

"I wanted to see if we were okay?"

"We?!" He shook his head

"Yes, we" I persisted

"I don't get you." He said looking straight ahead

 "Adam wait, I..." He interrupted me again

 "Everything that I do bothers you, exasperates you, irritates you." He got up and walked to the street while talking

"I can explain..." I tried saying walking towards him

"I know you can, I'm sure that you can. But is it worthwhile?"

Those eyes were killing me, cutting my very skin. They were cold, unemotional, probing. I didn't know these eyes. Where were his real eyes; the one full of warmth and tenure?. Those brown eyes just weren't his eyes. I walked up to him, grabbed him by the shoulders and faced him.

"Adam, I know I messed up." He snorted

"I know that since when we've met, I have done nothing but act like a jerk." He kept on dodging my gaze and I kept on chasing his.

"I know you're probably thinking that I am a lunatic who you had the misfortune to meet." I held his head spoke right to his face

"But I..." He interrupted me again

"See that is not even it. I think you are great guy. I do, I really do. I think you're amazingly talented in everything that you do. I mean we barely know each other but I've already gotten so close to you. It's just that ... I don't know if I can do this right now." He said looking down.

"Do what?"

"Vinny, there are things about you that I don't understand."

"Then take the time to understand." I replied

"You seem afraid. Afraid of letting me in." He said looking right into my eyes.

"I have so much go on in my life right now." He continued

"Adam..." I tried saying something but he wouldn't let me

"I don't want to hurt your feelings..." He said walking back to the porch and sitting on the steps again.

"Adam. You know what. If you want to end this because I am crazy, that I can understand. If you don't want see me anymore because I'm a jerk, that I can understand. Now, don't try to make your way out of this by using the `I'm busy and don't have time for a relationship' routine because I won't accept that." I blurt it out, which I guess took him by surprise because he didn't reply and I continued

"Adam, the truth is everyone has problems in their life. Everyone goes through good times and bad times. But people don't stop living because of that. You are right. I'm afraid. I am afraid that if I get closer to you I'll get disappointed again. I'm afraid you're gonna hurt. I'm afraid that you are just gonna use me and leave me at the end. And most of all I'm afraid that you and I might just actually workout. And do you know why? Look at me Adam. I am a mess."

"And I'm sorry, I am so fucking sorry for being a jerk."

"I'm frustrated. I'm physically frustrated, I'm emotionally frustrated, I'm sexually frustrated, I am intellectually frustrated."

"But every time that I'm with you, you make me forget it all. There is just no else when I'm with you, Adam. You are the first person who really listens to me. Who doesn't get tired of hearing me talking." I sat on my heels and rested my hands on his knees so that I could talk to him looking at him in the eyes.

"I am tired of you talking right now." He chuckled

"You make me laugh. You make me feel safe. Whenever I'm with you, it just feels right. And when I touch you, Oh my God, I'm in heaven. And I know you feel the same." I felt so overwhelmed with emotions.

"Don't throw this away, not yet. Let's see where this will take us. Let's see together what will come out of all this."

"Let's just take this one step at the time, and see what happens. We don't have to worry about the future when we are still living in the present. Let it come, let it all come and we will worry about it then."

He was looking at me not saying anything. I was done talking. Honestly, if at that point he still wanted to break this off with me, there was not a thing in the world that I could say or do to stop him. I mean, I had just opened up my heart to him. I had completely exposed myself to him. This was it; my true colors were out. I wanted to play this game clean so I put all of my cards on the table. He carried on searching in my eyes I guess for a confirmation of everything I'd just said. My heart was beating so fast, my hands were cold with anxiety. I did not know what Adam was going to do next. It could easily go either way at this point. If he accepted my apology, it would be wonderfully great, but if he rejected me, I would leave with my head held high carrying my dignity with me, and when I got back home to would let the mask drop and the world crash on me. It took him so long to answer that I drop my with the belief that I had just gotten my answer. Before I could move Adam held my hand. I lifted my head and was felt him pulling me by the shirt, and then he kissed me. He kissed me! His lips were so sweet and warm. Oh how I feared I would never taste those lips again. I couldn't think, my head was spinning, and I could only focus in kissing him continuously. We got to our feet and hugged each other so tight, that I thought that for I minute one of our ribs was going to crack. I kissed his entire face and hugged him more and more, I was so happy, so very happy. I think that even if I'd won the lottery it wouldn't have compared to what I was feeling at that moment. I knew that I loved, I had known for while. Why else would I feel this strongly for him. There were no doubts in my mind anymore. I was in love with Adam. Deeply and irremediably in love with him. He was taller than me so I had my on his resting on his neck. I looked up an

"Adam?"

"Huhm?"

"I like you a lot. I didn't say those things for just the hell of it"

"I would most certainly hope you not either."

"I really like you Adam. I really do"

"I care a lot for you too."

Even if I wanted, there are no words to describe how I felt at that moment. I was immensely, completely, unsubtly happy, more than I have been in months, maybe even in years. I hugged him so tight. I never wanted to let go of him. Because Adam was wearing only a pair of sweats and a ribbed tee I could feel the heat from his skin. I began feeling my own body reacting to all this. I mean, Adam was hot. I was extremely attracted to him. Now, even more – for some reason when I have feelings for someone I become extremely attracted to them – because of the way I felt about him. I could feel lust building up within me. I wanted to put my hand under his shirt and start biting his chest right there on the streets but I didn't. I didn't want to spoil the moment. The feeling inside was so overpowering that I started laughing stupidly. Laughing at everything, I was laughing at how lucky Adam and I were to meet each other and how curious it was the way we met.

"What are you laughing at?"

"I was remembering how we met." I said in the middle of chuckles

"Oh. Yeah, I guess it was sort of funny."

"I thought you were following me, stalking me or something."

"And all I wanted was to apologize for spilling your drink and maybe even buy another one." Joining me in my crazed laughter.

"I know, but you know, I guess I liked being chased by you." I said hugging him again.

We stayed like this I don't for how long. Holding each other, under the starred sky of Brookline, outside on his porch. I guess he must've realized we'd been there for awhile so he started.

"I have to go to work tomorrow." Adam said while still tangled up in me

"Me too." I replied with my head still lying on his shoulder.

"But I don't want you to go."

"I don't either."

"Do you spend the night?" He asked spontaneously

"I want to, but I don't know if I should."

"Oh man, I totally forgot." He let go of me suddenly realizing something

"What?" I got worried for a second

"My sister is here!" He explained

"Oh ok, so maybe then I can meet her." I said excited with a smile on my face.

"Well, she is here because of nana's death. She is going through a rough time with it all. I don't know if it this is the best time for the two of you meet each other." Adam said with a pained expression on his face

"Oh, right! You're right.  I'm sorry. That's fine. I totally understand, no problem at all." I blabbed.

"Okay. I should really get back inside and check up on her." Adam said walking back up towards me.

"Okay, you do that, and I will talk to you later, okay?" After wrapping my arms around back and inside his coat again.

"I want to see you soon." He kissed me

"Me too" I kissed him back. "But for now your sister really needs you, besides I'm not going anywhere. You have my number, you know where I work and where I live." And we kissed again.

"You're right. I call you tomorrow, okay?" He said looking right into my eyes.

"Yeah, so bye." And with that we kissed, really savoring each others mouths.

It was supposed to be a good-bye kiss but I couldn't seem to bring myself to let go of him. Our tongues swirled inside each other's mouth. And our hands had minds of their own. With my hands inside his coat around his back, I caressed him and pulled him to me. He held my head with both hands and was working my lips. God, he was such a good kisser. I wanted him, there and now, so bad, and I know he wanted me too. We finally had to cease our making out session so we could breathe before passing out for asphyxiation. We finally said good-bye and I got into my car. I sat there until he got back in and even a few minutes after. I was giving myself time to absorb everything that'd just happened. This phenomenal person, this amazing hot guy cared about me, couldn't get enough of me. It had to be a dream. It had been so long since someone had made me feel this way. I drove home with a huge grin on my face and slept like a baby. That night I didn't dream I was too tired to dream.

I worked all week. Our store was getting itself prepared to the holiday line and besides working with my clients I was helping in the visual department as well. I have always liked visual a lot; dressing up mannequins, putting displays together, fixing the windows displays, creating a new world to welcome people to the store. I know, it was weird and dorky of me, but as I always say `whatever floats your boat'. I hadn't had time to actually see Adam since the night when we made up and made out in front of house. We had talked a couple of times over the phone, even though, it would fine by me if we didn't get off the phone at all. I had to hold myself back several times before picking up the phone and calling him for no reason at all. I didn't really wanted to talk, I just wanted to listen to sound of his voice. But since everything had happened, I was keeping my emotion in check, so I wouldn't do anything stupid. Having my job excessively require my presence and Melissa – Adam's sister – being in town, it didn't really seem like he and I were gonna get together any time soon.  I love the way he worries about his sister, according to him she wasn't crying – much, she was primarily depressed and was suffering from a bit of mood swing, so he was still a bit skeptical about introducing us to each other. I understood after all, the girl had lost her grandmother. So the next 2 weeks our contact resume through the phone. To keep myself to call him at every other second, I was doing what any normal person would do. I was keeping my friends' ears busy.

"I think I really like him." I said on the phone

"Of course you like him honey, listen to yourself. I can't see you but I bet you're glowing."

"Am not! Do you think? Whatever, don't wanna think about it."

"Oh Sarah I don't know what I would do if it wasn't for you. "

"Oh honey, that's what friends are for."

"Real friends at least."

"What do u mean?" Sarah asked completely unaware of my suspicions

"I don't know, you know. It's Josh. He hasn't been acting really weird lately. He doesn't return my calls. For the past like two weeks, I can only get a hold of him at work. It almost feels like he's avoiding for some reason."

"Are u sure? It doesn't sound like Josh."

"I don't know. I do know there is something wrong. I just know it. I can feel it in the air, but I can't figure it out what it is."

"Maybe you're just imagining things, you know. After all, you and Josh are like brothers."

"Yeah, maybe."

"So we should get together this weekend, you know, do something."

"I know, as a matter of fact, Matt said he misses hanging out with you and the rest of the gang."

"I miss you guys too. I mean, I only manage to see Ray because he and I live together but even so, sometimes I go for like two or even three days without seeing him. We have to leave each notes in order to communicate."

"Oh Lord. So that's it. Why don't we spend the night at Matt's. I'll bring something for us to eat, and we can all cheap in and buy some buzz. We'll stay up late, talking and horsing around, I don't know, something like that."

"Yeah that sounds nice."

"Good. You can talk to Ray and call Josh and...

"Wait a minute, why don't call him? I mean I don't mind but, you know."

"Because Sarah, I know that something is up. And I rather cool it for awhile. If I call him I know I will ask about it, then you know."

"Fine, you can never avoid drama can you?"

"There's no drama. I just wanna avoid any sort of confrontation."

"What do you mean?"

"Sarah, you know how I am. I'm very transparent. If I pick up something in the air about this whole weirdness, I sure as hell will ask him about it. You know I don't give a shit. I like things out in the open."

"Oh God. Fine, I'll call. But you gotta promise to be nice."

"I am nice. I'm just honest. Oh before I forget, call Jenny too."

"No!!! You call her, I can't call her"

"Oh God. Don't tell you still have thing for her."

"I can't help it. She is beautiful, the way she dances drives me crazy, her lips, her eyes, her hair, her boobs.."

"Oh God, why are comments like that wasted on me, if only I were straight, that would be at least whole week worth of jerking off material."

"Eww. I better go after this."

"Whatever. I will give ya a call later."

            I sometimes forget how much better I always feel after talking with Sarah. She is so well tempered and easy-going. She always tries to look at things from other people's perspective, which makes her this incredibly understanding person, and sometimes a bit like a shrink. Spending time with her and the boys was definitely going to be fun. I knew it. I was really looking forward to it. Besides, it would probably help me take my mind off Adam for a while. Not seeing him was driving me nuts, and for some reason I was feeling horny like hell, which was only making matters worse, but there was very little I could do at this point. Family will always come first, and Adam should devote all of his attention to his sister. Besides, I had my own `family' gathering coming up this weekend, because to me my friends were my second family. I still needed to figure out what I was gonna make for Saturday night, but it was only Wednesday so I had time. For the next two days, I didn't hear from Adam. This whole situation was becoming almost unbearable, and the worst part was that, the more I tried to pretend that it was okay, the  more uneasy, and desperate I was becoming. To top it all off, work was killing. I was working almost 50 hours a week. But fortunately I was going to have the weekend off, so at least in this chaos I had something to look forward to. As I was walking out of the store and checking my bag for my phone someone beeped their car horn. When I looked up, I saw Adam, standing across the street outside of his car with a big grin on his face. I cross the street but I couldn't feel the ground. I got near him and just wanted to throw my arms around him and start making out with him right there but I wasn't sure how he'd react to that.

"Hi" I sighed

"How are ya?" He asked smiling but casually.

"Much better now."

"I've missed you." He said with a big grin on his face

"Me too. I-I've missed you too that is." I said getting a little clumsy with the words

"Ha, ha ha. I know what you mean."

"So how have you been?"

"Good, good."

"What is it? You look like you wanna say something."

"I actually want to do something but I don't know if you be okay with it."

"Go ahead, I promised I wouldn't freak out on you anymore remember."

"Okay. Here goes."

He leaned in, with one hand he pulled me by the waist with the other he held my head. He closed his eyes and I knew I had to close mine too, for what was going to happen next. As soon as everything went dark, I felt the softness and the warmth of his lips touching mine. For a moment I melted in his arms, how did I get through these days without this kiss? I knew we were on the streets and right in front of my uptight managed job. I couldn't careless for who saw us there. Besides, we were on Newbury street, Boston's `Fifth Avenue'. Nobody cares anymore around those areas. As a matter of fact, we were right in front of a gay-friendly church across from Banana. We finally broke our after what felt like an eternity.

"I can't believe you just did that."

"Should I have not?"

"Yes, you should have. I wanted to do this the second I saw from across the street."

"I wasn't sure if you'd be okay with it, because of the whole public place thing."

"I don't care if you don't." I said touching his face

"But there is also your job being right there too."

"They will just have to get over it."

"Maybe we should go somewhere else though, I want to kiss some more but not out here. Do want to come over to my place?"

"What about your sister and your cousin?"

"My sister is spending some time with a friend and my cousin is at his girlfriend. We have the entire place to ourselves."

"So let's ... oh shit! wait a minute I can't go."

"How come?" He asked with a pained expression

"I've already had plans with my friends we're gonna crash at my friend's Matt, myself and a few others."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, we're gonna drink and talk and dance a bit and eat. In fact, I'm still have to prepare something to take. You're welcome to come if you want."

"Nah, that's okay."

"No, come on. It's gonna be fun."

"I know, but I don't think going head-on and meeting all of friends all at once is such a good idea."

"Come on, they won't bite. Not unless you want them to. Which you don't."

"Ha ha ha ha ha okay."

"Besides, Josh will be there, so at least you don't feel like I'm the only one you'll know there. They've been dying to meet you."

"Really? Is that so??"

"Yeah, after all of the things I've said about you, they are curious."

"Yeah , I don't think so."

"Come on."

"Vinny, I really wanted to spend time with you. Alone, just the two of us."

"I know, but I can't blow them off like that."

"I know, and I wouldn't want you to either, otherwise they would hate me."

"Do you want at least go home with me right now, and spend a few minutes together, maybe even help me cook?"

"I don't know I'm not just a good cook."

"Come on. Compromising, remember?"

"Okay. But I'm telling you I can barely boil an egg."

We drove to my place, during the whole way there we held hands, and talked about things at work. Because I'm the one who usually does most of the talking, I was eager to hear about his days. Besides that was another way for to listen to him speaking. I loved the baritone husky-hoarseness of his voice. Occasionally, he would squeeze my hand, bring it to his lips, and kiss it. We got to my place and it was already almost 8:45. We first got rid of our shoes to relax a bit and got right to business I was to make mozzarella sticks, but I still had to roll them in the bread crumbs – I was just gonna fry them at Matt's. Because that was relatively easy, I had Adam do it, whereas I was gonna use an old Portuguese recipe for a pineapple turnover cake with nuts, which I had learned with my grandmother who'd learned with her mother – daughter of Portuguese parents but born and raised in Brazil. While I mixed the dough I kept on sneaking peeks at Adam who seemed really concentrated in what he was doing.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I just don't want to mess it up." He replied keeping his eyes in what he was doing

"Adam, you are rolling cheese sticks in bread crumbs, there is no way you can mess that up." I said laughing at him.

"What if some have too much crumbs in them and others don't have enough?"

"Ha ha, oh my god." The was precious

"Don't laugh at me, I'm serious." He said smiling, not taking his eyes off what he was doing."

I was finally done with the cake and had already put it in the oven. Adam was also finished with the cheese sticks. But amazing he was a mess. How he had gotten so dirty I had no idea.

"My God man. What happened to you?"

"I told I am not very used to spend time at the kitchen."

"You're gonna dirty your car when get in it."

"I was sort of hoping I could shower here."

"Oh, oh sure. Go ahead and I'll get you a towel."

He headed to the bathroom and I cleaned some of the mess up, then ran to my room to get him a towel. When I knocked on the door, he answered it wearing white sport trunks – short boxer-briefs. The fabric of his underwear hugging his thighs and waist, and that bulge in front that I remembered so well were absolutely amazing. I was speechless, I could only stare at him.

"I was thinking... do you want shower in there with me?

He said that, not even waiting for my answer, he started tugging on my shirt and slipping it over my head. In seconds I was naked standing in front of him, he slipped his underwear off and we got in the shower. I was hard in an instant, and Adam was hot for me too, because soon enough he pinned me up against the wall and started biting my neck. He held my hands apart up against the wall keeping me from touching him. So all I could do was relax and enjoy. He licked my chest, my neck, my chin, my ears and my lips. Every time I tried kissing him, he would pull away. He was teasing the shit out of me. My dick was as hard as rock, pointing straight up. And I could feel his dick poking my balls. He then, started descending down to my waist as he was started kneeling in front of me. He grabbed my dick and started stroking real slowly. He licked around my balls first, left then right. He moved to my thighs and started licking, biting, and sucking on them. I had my eyes closed, I was trying to just let go and let myself feel everything he was doing to me, and it was wonderful. Adam finally, slipped my dick inside his mouth and worked his magic on it. I was moaning from down my throat. With my hands I started playing with his hair. His tongue felt so good, the warmth of his mouth was so intense, and the slurping sound the he was making I was driving me to insanity. While he did that with one hand he caressed my stomach and with the other he played with my balls. Occasionally, he would switch from my dick to my balls. First, one, then the other, then both of them together, all that while stroking my dick. I pulled him up to his feet and kissed him, and kissed him. I wanted to give him as much pleasure as he had giving me. I started with his nipples and got the reaction that I wanted. I bit them, flicked my tongue on the them and sucked on them. I eventually, I went down on him too and played with him just like he had played with me. I turned him around and nose-dived in his little rosebud. He loved it because he was moaning so loud that there was no way that he was faking in it. After awhile I got to my feet, and we kissed so furiously that I thought we might even hurt each other. We, then, started jerking each other off while kissing, Adam grabbed our cocks and jerked them together. Not too long after that we both came, he first and then myself.

We showered and made out a little bit more in the bathroom. I had completely lost track of time. It wasn't until when I smelled the scent of the cake that I remembered about it. I tied a towel around my waist and ran to check the oven to make sure the cake wasn't ruined. It was completely baked when I got to it, fortunately, it was just fine. I took it out of the oven and sat it on the stove. In the middle of that the phone rang.

"Hello." I picked up

"HELLOO??" Matt shrieked from the other end of the line.

"What??"

"Vinny, where in the HELL have you been? Do you know what time it is?"

"Matt, come on down man. It's not even late."

"I must've called a thousand times already. Why aren't you picking up? He demanded

"I was in the shower, okay. Jeez man." I answered annoyed with the interrogation

"Vinny, it's already almost 10, when are you gonna come?"

"Soon!!! Will you lay off already, Jesus. If you let me go I will go in the to my room and chang... ha ha." I was trying to speak but Adam had come out of the bathroom and was hugging me and tickling me.

"What the fuck is going on?" He asked

"Ha ha huh? Nothing. There's nothi... ha ha stop it." I wanted to talk to Matt but Adam wouldn't let me.

"Who's there with you?" He demanded

"Nobody. I gotta go now, I will see you in half hour." I hung up the phone

"They're gonna have you for the rest of the night, so they can wait." He said taking me to the couch and lying on top of me.

"No, wait. I promised I'd be there in a half hou..." I tried reasoning with him but what I really wanted was to let him do whatever he wanted with me.

"You're mine now, besides, it won't kill them to wait a little longer." He said while attacking my neck.

"Adam...I...have...to...go..." I wanted to resist his charms but my will was nowhere near as strong as my attraction to him.

"No." He was now treating my chest with a tongue work.

"Adam..." I pleaded

"No."

"Ahhh, ohhhh." He'd won.

Forty minutes later I had to hop back in the shower to wash off the sweat. This time I locked the bathroom door so Adam wouldn't. Although, I was very much loving it all, I had someplace to be, I couldn't ditch my friends. I was in and out of the shower in 5 minutes. I ran to room, threw t-shirt, a spring jacket, jeans and sneakers on. I figured we were gonna stay inside so I didn't have to dress up, even though I was gonna be at Matt's. I ran to the kitchen to wrap everything up. Once I was done I noticed the Adam was out on the balcony.

"What are you doing out here?" I said hugging him

"Well you locked the door, so I thought that maybe out here I wouldn't be in your way." He responded still looking out at the ocean

"Come on, please don't say that. You know I didn't want you getting in because I can't even shower when I'm with you."

"I'm sorry."  He said with a hint of sadness in his voice

"No, don't be. Because I love it, it's just that, tonight I can't.

"I've missed you, you know. And I was looking forward to spending the night with you." He said turning around and looking at me in the eye

"Then come with me. It will be fun, everyone is gonna love you."

"It's not the same thing Vinny."

"I know but I know you would love it."

"That's okay."

"Are you sure? I don't want to force you into coming with me but at least we can spend some more time together and you would get to meet my friends."

"Yeah, I don't think so."

"Okay suit yourself I won't insist anymore. But we have to go now."

"Okay."

I got all of my stuff and walked downstairs with Adam. I noticed he was a little bombed down that I was really leaving so I rode with him just to alleviate some of the tension. He was quiet. I wanted to make him turn around, drive back home and go to the shower or the living room or maybe even go to bed to just even cuddle with him. The ride was pretty short so we made it in roughly 15 minutes. He parked right outside of Matt's building.

"Don't be like that." I tried saying

"Like what?" He said a bit annoyed but trying to be discreet about it

"You know what I mean." I pressed on

"Don't worry about me, I will be fine." He said smiling

"I promise will make it up to you."

"Vinny, it's okay." He tried to reassure me

"No, it's not. And I want to do this for you, for us. When are you off next? Do want to do come over to my place tomorrow?"

"You won't quit, will you?" He said laughing

"Who? Me?? Never."

"Okay, I will clear my agenda for tomorrow."

"Okay. What do you want to do?"

"It's doesn't matter. I just wanna do it with you."

"Okay then, tomorrow we'll do something nice together, just the two of us."

" I'd like that."

We kissed good-bye, and I walked over to the door. It was little past eleven, so I knew I was gonna get shit from people. I rang the bell and got buzzed in. When I got upstairs. Ray was at the door. Not a good sign. That probably meant that Matt was mad.

"Faggottie faggot. Where've you been.? Ray asked smiling a little too much for someone sober.

"Sorry I'm late I got ...uh... side tracked with something."

I walked in and everyone and some people were there, Sarah, Jenny, Daniel, Carl, Josh, Ned, Laura, Ray and Matt of course, plus people that I didn't know. It seems that I was the one who got the memo saying this was a `friends only' party. They all seemed to be having a lot of fun. Sarah, Jenny, two pretty girls – one blonde and the other asian - and a guy were swapping little culinary secrets and how to make pasta taste as Italian as possible. Laura was on the couch with a guy and girl, drinking and talking about hair products, while Daniel, Carl and Matt and another 3 guys were talking about workout routines and what to do to get quick results.

"Matt, I'm telling you, you have to come with me to Bellie's . They have the latest equipment, everything is digital and top of the line in terms of technology." Argued Carl

"Hey guys." I greeted

"Look who decided to show up." Matt responded not looking at me

"Hi Matt, I know I'm late, I-I... uh ... just had a few things to take care."

"Really! Good for you, now if excuse I need to take care of a few things of my own!" Matt answered walking out on me.

"What's his problem?" I asked the guys

"Don't ask me! You two are the ones with this weird/obsessive/possessive relationship." Carl walked on me too.

I just stood there looking at Daniel and the other guys awkwardly, not understanding why of all the hostility. It was early I had just walked in so maybe after a bit people would warm up to me. I excused myself and walked into the kitchen to put the food I'd brought down, and met Jenny, Sarah and their friends. I knew, for awhile, that Sarah was putting the moves on Jenny but so far nothing had happened, especially now that they had company. As I saw Jenny I realized how long it had been since I'd last seen her. No phone calls, no movies, no random home visits, no shopping, no nothing, nada.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. How are you?" I tried to forget about Matt and sound as friendly and fresh as I could.

"Hey Vinny. How are ya?" Sarah said in a middle of a tight hug.

"I'm okay, just a little weirded out by something that just happened but pretty much okay."

"So Sarah, introduce me to your friends." I said smiling at the strangers, who were also grinning back.

"They're with Jenny. This Tina Fisher, Lana Dihn and Michael Lass."

"Hi. It is very nice to meet you all." I responded 

"Hey Jenny, how are you? I feel like we haven't talked in ages." I turned to Jenny trying to connect with her.

"That may be because you decided you were `too busy' with you new boyfriend or whatever the hell he is, to manage to even call me." Jenny responded matter-of-factly

"Jenny, come on. That's not exactly true..." I tried to defend myself but was cut off. She turned to Sarah and said

" I'm sorry Sarah, but I'm suddenly in need of some fresh air, I will see you later. Come on guys, let me introduce to some of my friends" Jenny walked out the kitchen followed by her friends.

"What is everybody's PROBLEM tonight?"

"Hey. Are you okay?" Sarah asked with a I-am-sorry-about-that-but-it-is-your-fault tone.

"Please, Sarah. Not you too. What did I do that was so wrong."

"Vinny, you know I would never get involved into others people relationship."

"I don't have a relationship with Matt or Jenny, we're all just friends, at least we're supposed to be."

"Friendships qualify as relationships. Especially one as strong and intense as your friendship with Matt."

"I don't understand why he's acting like some betrayed wife or something. And Jenny?? I mean I know we haven't really talked but it's not like she couldn't call me either."

"I think that they are both showing the same symptoms, and they are not jealousy symptoms as much as neglection."

"For crying out loud, you cannot be serious. That's just stupid!"

"Like I said I don't get involved, all I'm trying to do is help but I better let you figure things out on your own, since my ideas seem to be so stupid" She said walking out on me, obviously upset.

"Sarah wait..." Another one, I honestly didn't take much of that..

It was official I shouldn't have come here tonight. I had no clue why everyone was being so weird and sensitive on me. I was having serious thoughts about just grabbing my stuff and fucking leaving. I mean I had nothing to lose. They could all just go to he... And that's when it downed me. I did have something to lose, a whole lot actually. I was really into Adam but I couldn't let my relationship with him, ruin my relationship with my friends. For some reason I felt so lonely and remembered of Adam. I wanted to talk to him, share with him my frustration, be with him, even though I had just spent hours with him. After giving it some thought, Sarah's theory didn't seem so stupid. I guess I was guilty of having abandoned my friends lately. Pretty much, everyone does it unconsciously when they get into a brand new romantic relationship. Well, there was only one thing to do. I fried the mozzarella sticks and went to see Matt. I found by the window viewing South Boston. I came from behind and grabbed his ass.

"Hi, Mattie-waddie."

"Get off." He slapped my hand away.

"Listen, I'm just gonna come out and say this: I know you're mad because we've hung much lately, nor talked on the phone like 5 times a day as we normally do. And because you think I'm blowing you off because of Adam, like tonight I almost did." He turned to me was really listening.

"And truth is that you are absolutely right. I have let my relationship with – or whatever we have together – get between us. Me and you, and myself and pretty much all of others friends. I am so sorry about that. I swear if I, at an moment had even suspected that you were all feeling this way I would have never continued. But the things is that I didn't, and I'm just gonna have to work harder and maintaining this totally complex relationship that we have as intact as much I possibly can, but from now on you're gonna have to get used to the idea that I have to make time for him too. You're one my best friend and no one but yourself can change that." I knew I had really got through to him but he was still looking at me as kind weird, so I just waited to see what was he gonna do next.

"Bitch, did you at least bring good food?? I'm hungry." He said through a smirk

"I knew you loved me, can't stay mad at me, can ya? I hugged him and grabbed his ass again.

"Idiot! Get off my ass, you pervert!"

"Come on, you know you like it."

"Shut the fuck up, where is the food?"

"Go in the kitchen, I made some mozzarella sticks."

While Matt went into the kitchen, I knew that was just of half of the work done I still had to talk to Jenny. However, talking to her was going to be harder than talking to Matt. I just needed some time to prepare, Jenny can sometime get pretty intense, so I needed to study the situation for a few minutes. Meanwhile I made conversation with everyone else. I took interest of a group that was seated at in the living room. I saw Laura, Daniel, Ned, Carl, Josh, Sarah and two of the guys that I had seen when I had just arrived at the party. I hadn't paid attention before but they both very good-looking guys.

"Hey guys! How are you all? I'm I saw you guys before but I forgot to introduce myself, I'm Vinny!" I said extending my hand to one of the strangers.

"Caleb, nice meeting you." Caleb was a 6 feet dark features guy.; he had wavy back hair, scruffy face and strong and squared jaw line, dark and accentuated brows and bright blue eyes. He was lean with muscles well distributed throughout his body. Broad shoulders and small waist, roughly a 32 or 33 waist. He shook my hand and I turned to his friend who already his friends stretched out.

"Hi, I'm Hank." Hank on the other was opposite of Caleb; short about 5'8'', buzzed dirty blonde hair, more of boyish looks. Hank was definitely more muscular than his friend, really stocky looking. With a more a clean look but just the same blue eyes, Hank was nor far from gorgeous.

"Nice meeting you too Hank." I responded after absorbing every detail of both their figure.     

"Hey Josh." I greeted Josh.

"Hey." He responded wryly

"Hey Vinny, how are you?" Laura got up and hugged me.

"I'm good sweetie. And you?"

"Good. I haven't seen ya lately. You've' busy' I hear."

"Ha ha, a little a guess. So was it up with you? How is going at Starbucks?" I asked her after joining the group in the living room.

"It's going! I had to fire 2 guys about a week ago and before we were already 3 people short, so for the number of people I have now working with me, it couldn't be better." Laura was a store manager of a Starbucks – coffee shop – in Back Bay, the gayest part of Boston, which for her was great because being kind of butch as she was, working and living in a gay community, her changes of getting bashed or harassed almost 0.

"What happened, why did fire them?" Ned asked

"Because I caught them making out in the stockroom." She answered deprecatingly

"Wow are you serious?" Hank asked

"And you fired over that??" I asked incredulous.

"Why didn't you just give them a warning or something?" Ned seemed to share the feeling as myself.

"Because I caught them doing it at work but also during company time. I couldn't just look the other way." She answered nonchalantly

"Why?? Or suffering from a stiff neck or something?" Josh asked as indifferent as Laura had started telling the story.

"Very funny, but it is my job and that's what get paid to do." Answered obviously annoyed with everyone persistence on the subject.

"Really, one would think you'd do it even for free." Josh said with such casualty that you would think that he had no idea of what kind reaction he could expect from Laura after that. 

"Does anyone wants more crab cake? I made them myself." I said trying to intervene and cool things off.

In reality, Josh and Laura have never really been that best of friends. Honestly, I'm sure that there are both simply polite with each sure for everyone else's sake. They both share a few common friends, so I believe they have some sort of an unspoken/unwritten rule to keep up appearances, but tonight that rule was being thrown out of the window and we were gonna have to get involved in order to dissipate the tension that had quickly built up.

"I am not sorry about performing my duty as manager to maintain a professional interaction amongst my employees. In my job, I sometimes have to present a more strict posture that I otherwise would like to. It's unfortunate, but somebody has to do it."

"That's way besides the point my dear, what's in question here, is the casualty and indifference on which you treat this matter with."

"Humm Vinny, how did you make these? They are really good, and how did get them to have this buttery taste?" Carl asked catching up on my strategy in break things up.

"I don't even know why I wasting my time trying to prove a point to someone who's clearly incapable of comprehending the kind of responsibility that I am entrusted with." Laura said, now, not giving a rat's ass about appearances.

"It's actually really easy Carl. All you have to do is..."

"You know, it is about time you woke and smelled the coffee, being that that's ALL that you do. You make coffee." Snapped right back joining her in no longer hiding his feeling towards her.

"Speaking of coffee, I'm really thirsty. Does anyone want anything I'm gonna get us something?" Sarah was now trying to help me in stopping this.

"I do. I'm really thirsty myself." I responded eagerly trying to keep Josh and Laura from continue argue.

"As a matter of fact we all need a drink. Laura I know you are very good with mixed drinks. Do you mind giving me a hand, meanwhile I can prepare something for you. What are you mood for?" Sarah was flirting with Laura trying to be as sweet as possible, who on the other hand was glaring at Josh who was also staring back at her.

"Bloody Mary." She got up and went with Sarah to go make drinks.

"Josh do you want come help me in choosing a nice cd this song sucks."

"Yeah whatever." He got up and followed me to Matt's room, where he kept all his cds.

"Ye yeh, yeh Bloody Mary my ass."

"I normally wouldn't ask but what the hell is wrong with you?"

"What? I'm tired of pretending." Josh said throwing himself and Matt's bed.

"Yeah, well, you don't have to be so forward about it." I said while shuffling through Matt cd case.

"I really don't think you're the best person to be holding this argument." Josh answered leaning up on his elbows, looking at me.

"What do you mean?" I stopped to look at him.

"Come on Vinny. You never even try to hide how you feel about stuff, it's always right there, written all over face."

"I just don't think this is the time or place for you to finally come out about how you don't like her." I responded

"We all know she is a bitch, I don't even know why she was invited." Josh said rolling onto his back. I was got up, looked at him and said.

"Because like yourself, she has friends here. The very least you both could do is to remain civil."

"You know, I'm so not in the mood for a lecture. I'll see just you later okay."

With that, he walked out of room. I had no clue of was going on with everyone. I mean, we were all supposed to be friends, some were even friends of friends. It seemed like everyone was in a hostile mood. I am no one savior, but I knew I had to something, at least try. I sat on Matt's bed thinking about what to do and that was when I spotted it.

Outside, in the living room, Ned, Carl, Jenny, Matt, and Ray were all drinking and chatting, it seemed that at least amongst those individuals things were okay, but I still wanted to do something nice. I came out of Matt's room scrolling something. No one really noticed because of the music that was playing. Then I settle it down with a big thud. Everyone stopped talking and looked at me. I plugged it and it and it came alive.

"Testing, testing..." I had set up Matt's karaoke machine. It was about 3 feet tall and it was really nice one. His parents had it shipped from Japan for his 19th birthday. It had wheels and everything.

"Great! It seems like I have everyone's attention. No, wait! Let's see, Laura, Sarah and Josh would you mind joining us." A minute later, they came into the room, a little shocked with the sound of the microphone.

"Now, here we are. Well, I just want say that this evening has been so far very ... interesting. I got here late, so I don't really know what went on before.

"An orgy."

"Man! I can't believe I missed that. I'm just gonna have to kick myself later. Anyhow. This, what we have here right, is very rare. I never really get to have everyone together like that. I'm not sure yet sure if was a good idea or not but there's little to do now, right?"

"Anyhow, the reason why I'm doing all this, you know, microphone, speakers, is because I wanna us all to have a little bit of fun. And before you boo me let me make this a little more interesting. I propose that we all sing, solo, duets, whatever and get evaluated by each other. Because we are all friends I'm sure we'll be pretty fair."

"Yeah right!"

"Come on. So anyways, after a round whoever gets the lowest score need to drink whatever everyone else decides."

"Oh come on. Are you serious?" Ned complained.

"Oh yeah. Baby."

"Me first, me first." Matt came running towards, to get the microphone.

"Ok. Ok. So what are you sing for us?" I asked all excited that someone was getting the ball rolling.

"First I want invite Ray up here." Matt said pointing Ray.

"Yeah, ah, no."

"Come Ray. We've practiced this before, remember?" Matt added

"I don't know what you talking about." Ray responded crossing his arms looking the other way."

"Come on, man. Stop being a sissy." Matt went in middle of everyone and pulled ray to the microphone.

"So what song are two gonna be performing?"

"Put in number 267."

"Which song is that?"

"You'll know in a minute."

After a couple of seconds the song started, I recognized the song right away. It was `Come on over' by Christina Aguilera. Oh my God I already knew what that was gonna turn into. Matt started singing the first verse, then he and Ray did the chorus together. Ray then sang the second verse. It was the most hilarious thing I had seen in ages. Every time one would sing, they would try to imitate Christina's moves from the video, so there were hips shaking and handing dancing in the air. Everyone was laughing hard. Then it time for the bridge where various high notes and vocal embellishments. It was a disaster and big hit at the same time. Although, they were both pitchy and most of the time off pitch throughout the song it was just so entertaining and funny that everyone was enjoying themselves. Up next I convinced Sarah to sing something. She, Carl and Ned sang Maroon 5 ` This love'. They sang the whole song together. Sarah and Carl were pretty decent but Ned was just off as Ray and Matt. After that, no one really wanted to go, people were really embarrassed. So then Jenny blurts.

"Hey Tina knows how to sing."

So after a lot of cheering and convincing Tina decided to sing. She looked at the song selection for a minute and then picked a song, `How do I live without you' by Leann Rimmes. She was definitely nervous, but there was something about her, some inner confidence that made her go through with it.

How do I

Get through one night without you?

If had to live without you

What kind life would that be?

Oh, I need in my heart

Need you hold me

You're my whole, my heart, my soul

If you ever leave

Baby you would take away everything

Good in my life

Then tell me now

How do I live without you?

How do I breathe without you?

How would I ever, ever survive?

How do I, how do I

Oh how do I live?

She could really blow. Her voice was pure and soothing. She reached every note and every embellishment, timing was great, and rhythm flowed accordingly. She was definitely a good singer. She continued singing and when Tina was done, she got a lot of applause and cheering from all of our friends. Every one was having fun, singing and some being totally goof balls. After some real bad act from Ray singing "Hero" by Mariah Carey and Josh doing "Holler" by Spice Girls, Matt and Sarah who were fully aware I sang started me to go sing. And a while they got everyone chanting so I had to go. I love singing, there's nothing in the world the gives more pleasure but I sometimes get a bit self conscious about singing in front of friends for two reason; 1ª I have think in the back of head the one of them is gonna judge me somehow, and 2ª I don't them to think that I'm showing off.

But anyways I had no choice but to sing so. I looked at the book with the song selection and soon after found a song that I was most definitely familiar with, since I had sung it several in private and during my lessons "One Last Cry" by Brian Mcknight. While I was putting my selection when the doorbell rang. Matt went to go answer and I started singing, as I most of time do I closed my eyes.

(Verse1)

My shattered dreams and broken heart

Are mending on a self

I saw holding hands

Standing close to someone else

Now I sit

All alone

Wishing my feeling was gone

I gave my best you

Nothing for to do

But have one last cry

(Chorus)

One last cry

Before I leave it all behind

I gotta put you out my mind

This time

Stopping living a lie

I guess I'm down to my last cry

Cry!

(Verse2)

I was here and you were there

I guess we never could agree

While the sun shines on you

I need some love to rain on me

Still I sit

All alone

Wishing all my feeling was gone

Gotta get over

Nothing for to do

But have one last cry

(Chorus)

One last cry

Before I leave it all behind

I gotta put you out my mind

This time

Stopping living a lie

I know I gotta be strong

`Cuz round me life goes on and on

And on, oonn

(Bridge)

I'm gonna dry my eyes

Right after I had my

(Chorus)

One last cry

One last cry

Before I leave it all behind

I gotta put you out my mind

This time

Stopping living a lie

I guess I'm down

I guess I'm down

I guess I'm dowwwnn

To my last cry

As usually, I didn't hear anything while I was singing. It's almost as if there was nobody else around me, which is most of time the case. I just concentrated and tried to blend in with the melody. I let myself go and become the music itself. I opened my eyes and I could feel them a bit damp. I looked around and after a millisecond I was taken back to reality after hearing everyone applauding me. It felt weird but extremely good, I felt immensely happy to be there and to know the I'd done I good job. I knew I reached every single note, and embellishment, even the most challenging ones. I knew I've done Brian Mcknight proud right about now. And that's when I saw him. Along with everyone else, I could see Adam right next to Matt beaming at me with huge smile, clapping his hands really hard. I felt more nervous after seeing him there than when I was actually singing. He had on a million dollars smile and I guess the started to put me at ease. People were really applauding and I started to feel a bit uncomfortable. The claps finally died down and I started to walk towards Adam. But before I could reach him, I was grabbed by Jen, who pulled me into tight bear hug.

"You're a freaking son of a bitch but I love right now. I never knew you could do that." Jenny said while holding real tight in a hug.

"I'm sorry about everything and thank you." I said hugging her back and glad that we had made up.

"I'm just gonna forgive you because I decided to be the bigger person." She said finally letting go of me

"Ha ha, sure Jenny." I replied

"You are really good." Tina offered

"Thank you, but you did really well yourself." I replied

"Yeah, but what you got there is an enormous talent. I don't know what you are still doing here, not being famous."

"Ha ha."

"I still have goose-bumps." Said Jenny's other friend Lana.

"Ha ha ha. Thanks."

After a bit later I finally got free from them and tried to go to Adam who was now talking to Josh, I walked right up and to both of them and stood right in front of Adam.

"Hi." I offered

"You were..."Adam started saying with a huge smile on his face.

"I was..." I was really wanted to hear from him.

"Amazing, phenomenal, spectacular, sensational." His compliments only made my smile widen even more.

"I'm glad you liked it."

"Like it? I loved it! I had no idea that you had all that in you." He said hugging me and giving me a smooch in the lips.

"There is much about me you don't know." I said in a mischievous well

"I can see that." He grinned back

"And you Josh, are you in a better mood?" I asked still in Adam's arms.

"I don't what you are talking about, I'm fine." I guessed he meant he was over it.

"Oh okay. So do you think I did well?" I tried to change the subject

"Yeah you were good." I said coldly

"Thanks, Josh that means a lot me."

"Sure." Why he was acting so weirdly I couldn't tell. But I didn't want get to it at this point.

"You I think I'm gonna go get a drink I'll see you guys later." Josh turned on his heels and left.

"What was that all about?"

"You got me there."

"So... why are you here? I thought you said you didn't want participate."

"Oh yeah, well I didn't mean to stay. As a matter of fact, I came because of this." He said reaching into his pocket.

"My cell phone?!!??" I was in complete shock

"Yeah." He responded handing me the phone

"Where did you get?? I thought it was in my bag."

"No, you left it in my car when I dropped you off."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." He snuggled even tighter on me

"And thank you for coming." I said locking eyes with him

"I'm glad I did too. I would've never thought you could..." I silenced him with a kiss.

"Please stay." I pleaded him while he paused and thought about it

"Only if you sing again."

"Deal!" I settled a kiss on his lips.

"Come on, at least introduce me to some of this people."

We went back to group and I went around while I introduced him to everyone. Adam seemed to enjoy everyone company and I knew this because of his constant smiley face. I did hold my end of the bargain by singing some more, but this time it was either with Ray, Matt or even Sarah. Pretty much the rest of the night was very uneventful except that around 2:30 am we were visited by the cops and had to abandon our singing. Everything was pretty laid back after that. Around 3 some started leaving and some decided to crash so started heading to the bedroom. All guests were pretty much gone by 3:30 only our group lasted and out of us Jenny and I were the only ones not to crash and Matt's. Adam had convinced to spend the night with him. So, we said our good-byes and drove to his place. In the way we talked for a bit.

"Did you enjoy yourself?" I asked from the passenger sit, rubbing his right in between my hands.

"Hmpf! I did." He answered after a long sighed

"Did you really?"

"Yeah!"

"My friends really seemed to like you."

"I liked them too, especially Sarah. She appears so nice."

"She is. She'd helped me several times before, in particular when I was coming out. She helped me find myself when I thought I was really gonna lose it." He listened to this but nothing said. I could sense there was something that he was telling me.

When we got to his place he parked the car and sat there with his eyes closed squeezing my hands. I was a bit anxious, I knew he had something choked up in his throat.

"What's wrong?" He opened his and span his body sideways, so that he was facing me.

"Tonight, when you went around introducing me to your friends..."

"Yeah..."

"You introduced me as a friend."

"Right."

"Well, is that what you think of me?

"What do you mean?."

"I want to know what do want you from me? From Us?"

Was I hearing it right? Was Adam trying to have the `where do we stand' talk with me? Not that I hadn't thought about it or even wondered when it'd happen but here it was. The guy that I had been sort of seeing for the past months wanted to know what I wanted from him and myself. I suddenly was flooded with all of the bad memories of my previous relationships. Did I really wanted to go through all this again? Could I go even try to open myself up to someone new and let him in my life and ultimately my heart?

I just sat there staring at Adam speechless. I just didn't know what to say.

--- As you may all have seen this is a regular story with sex involved and not the other way around. But I promise that next chapter things are going to heat up big time---