Chapter 1 : Never forgive or forget.
To all outward appearances we were a happy loving family. However the true fact was that we were a family split into two halves. My parents and then us kids.
I was the middle son of three brothers. My eldest brother Edward R Carter IV had just turned 16, I, Thomas J Carter was 14 and my younger brother James E Carter was 13. We were close in ages and growing up we were close as brothers. My parents on the other hand were very distant figures.
When you are the Chairman and Chief Executive Officer of C.I.C., one of the largest Insurance companies in the nation, you are a busy man with much on your mind. There was little time to spend with us kids however dad always ensured he appeared, no matter ever how briefly, at most of the important events in our lives. He made sure he was seen and it looked good.
My mother Joanna was even more aloof from us kids, her position as the wife of one of the most influential businessmen of the time meant certain responsibilities and commitments. She was the chairperson of the National Benevolent Fund for Destitute Freemen, sat on numerous committees and was greatly involved in the arts at a national level. There was little time for her children and after all she had indentured servants to care for us. We hardly saw her growing u except at the breakfast and dinner table.
All this meant that we were cared for in our younger years by trusted family servants and as we grew up and became teenagers it was still the family servants appointed by my father that cared for our daily needs. There was little love in our life. The servant nannies that had cared for us, reared us and looking back showed us boys the only true love we had ever received when we were young had been sold off by my father as we each turned ten. A highly trained nanny was a good investment and I remember my father commenting when Jim's nanny was sold soon after he turned ten that all three nannies had returned a good profit on the initial investment.
My father was very wealthy, having succeeded to the Chairman ship of C.I.C. at the age of 35 when my Grandfather Edward R Carter II died suddenly. Our house was locally referred to as the "mansion". We lived in a very affluent gated community but even by the local standards our house was larger and more opulent than any others in that community. This gave us kids status and we knew and used that status well.
It gave our servants status of sorts too and I had noticed in the past how they were proud to be seen around the local shops and on errands wearing my fathers servant livery
My brothers and I shared a wing of the house that consisted of 3 suites, one for each of us kids. Within the suite we had our own sitting room, study, small kitchen, bedroom and bathroom. When I had friends from school over, I was the envy of even the wealthiest of them, none had the freedom of their own suite and a personal servant, like my brothers and I had. Admittedly, we three brothers had to share the servant, but that would change when we turned 18, then we would get our own personal servants.
I for one was glad that it was 18 before a servant would be appointed, because at 14 I was very modest and insisted that Raymond the most recent servant appointed by my father to care for our personal needs within the three suites was never in my suite when I dressed or washed.
I know my brothers didn't have the same feelings of modesty and would walk around their suites in various stages of undress with no sign of embarrassment. They would do it when I was there visiting them and they didn't care if Raymond was working in their room either. Like a well trained servant he always kept his head bowed and eyes lowered and I know both my brothers thought what did it matter if he saw them, he was after all only an indentured life servant. Still I preferred to lock the door to my suite when I was changing or using my bathroom. The other domestic servants who made our beds and cleaned the suites knew to do their work when I was at school or out about the house. I rarely saw them, or maybe it was that I just didn't notice them; they were of little consequence to me anyways as long as they did their jobs satisfactory.
My brother Ed had taken lately to taunting me in front of Jim about my excessive modesty, he could see it made me blush a shade of red and I wondered if both him and Jim knew the truth behind my modesty?
Surely not, but still over the last six months my younger brother Jim had shot up in height till he was about two inches taller than me. This was embarrassing as no guy likes to be left behind by his younger brother.
This was highlighted yesterday when there were another two official looking gentlemen inspecting the house. This had become a regular and extremely worrying occurrence in the last two weeks after the jury in dad's trial returned its guilty verdict and dad's trial drew to its concluding stage. I came across them as I was walking through the east wing hall of the house. They mistook me for Jim.
As I approached they flipped through a pile of paper attached to a clipboard, introduced themselves by name and before I could respond said "you must be master James". I tried to hide my blushing and taking a firm but high pitched voice quickly corrected their error. I blushed again when one said to the other, "doesn't look 14". They shrugged and continued on their inspection and I still flushed and hoping no servants had overheard the conversation hurried on my way.
The weather in early autumn was still good, not too hot and not too cold. There was still warmth in the sun but some how there was a chill in my soul that just wouldn't go away.
Dad's trial was taking its toll on the whole household. A few days ago the prosecution and dads defence team had given their final submissions as to the sentencing penalty to go with the guilty verdict. The servants were getting noticeably sloppy and Dad, preoccupied with his defence was not the firm and forceful master he had been throughout all my childhood memories. Our overseer, Mr Harris and his assistant Lyons along with the apprentice overseer Charker were trying their best to keep the household running tightly, but even I could sense that even they were wondering about their on going employment prospects.
Raymond knocked that morning on my suite door and then entered as he had always done. I could hear his soft steps as he pulled the curtains in my sitting room then knocked again on my bedroom door, which was open.
"oooooohhhhhhhhhkkkkk Raymond" I moaned in my usual grumpy morning attitude
"Morning Master Thomas sir" Raymond brightly replied.
Why he had to be so bright and cheerful in the morning I could never understand. I was not a morning person. I guess it was part of his servant training, servants were expected to always be happy in the company of their masters and other freemen.
Raymond had been our servant for nearly twelve months now. He had been born a servant, on our property, his mother being in dad's service. I had never heard mention of who his father was. He grew up as part of our household and had been trained as he grew up, on dad's specific instructions to serve me and my brothers needs.
He was, my brother Ed had once told me, a year older than Ed. There was something about Raymond that reminded me of someone but I could never quite put my finger on whom. Raymond like us three brothers was blond, a hair colour that my father must have liked, for I had noticed that nearly all of the younger servants who worked in dads service were blond.
"That will be all, you may leave" I bluntly replied.
When I heard the suit door close I got out of bed and went and locked the door, Raymond of course had a key but he would not dare to use it if I had locked the door and he knew I was in my suite.
I showered and began dressing in my school uniform that Raymond had laid out the night before. By the time I was fully dressed in the middle school summer uniform of the Holy Trinity Grammar School which consisted of an open neck short sleeve khaki shirt with HTGS emblazoned on the pocket and matching shorts accompanied by black lace up shoes and grey long socks with the schools colours ringed around the top, which all middle school boys wore scrunched down so that the socks looked like they were baggy short socks.
Jim wore the same uniform but Ed was now in the senior school and wore a short sleeve white shirt with the senior school tie, grey long trousers and black shoes.
As usual Ed knocked on my door as he emerged to go down for breakfast then went over and knocked on Jim's door. The three of us would go down to breakfast with our parents together.
Raymond was standing in position at the end of the hall that lead to our suites, outside the small anti room he used when on duty in our wing. He rudely stepped out in front of us, halted us as we walked by and checked our uniforms, made some minor adjustments to Jim and my uniforms, then eventually bowed his head, but I thought in a very sloppy almost impertinent manner and then waited for us to move around him.
Annoyed I said to Ed that I felt Raymond was in need of some encouragement, he was forgetting his place as a servant. Ed at first seemed to hesitate but then agreed, he said that "the fact that there was some uncertainty hanging over the household was of no concern to a servant. That was one of their privileges as servants, they didn't have to worry about anything except serving their masters."
Ed having just past his sixteenth birthday, had been presented with his masters cane and paddle and was authorised to use them on our servants if he deemed it necessary. Dad had limited that authority in practise to just the paddle, as dad felt there could be no chance of Ed causing any long term harm to ant servant if he just used the paddle.
What a great party Ed's sixteenth had been only those few months back, took everyone's mind off the trial for a short while. As is traditional Ed was given his first paddle and cane by dad and Raymond was given the honour as our personal servant of receiving Ed's first paddling. It had been beautiful to watch. Ed had practised and built up his technique over the previous month and Raymond acknowledged the skill Ed had shown at his coming of age paddling by shedding a few tears. I had already told Raymond I was looking forward to my coming of age paddling and hoped he would get to receive the honours from me as well. He had of course replied "yes master, thank you" but he didn't seem to appreciate the significance of being the coming of age recipient like we free boys did.
Ed turned to Raymond and he told him his attitude was poor and that this afternoon at 4pm when we returned from school he should present himself for 5 paddles to help him refocus on his correct servant attitude.
"Thank you for correcting my ways master" Raymond replied dutifully but there was still a hint of attitude in his voice.
Breakfast with our parents had never been a pleasant experience but lately it was sheer torture. You could cut the air with a knife. Dad and mum were obviously upset and nervous about the trial and it was showing especially after the guilty verdict.
In fact for the last three days mum had not even been able to bring herself to look us boys in the eyes, it was as if she was embarrassed by something else about us or her, not just about dad's current predicament.
I confess I didn't understand very much of the consequences that could arise from Dads trial, I just wasn't interested in all that grown up stuff. Jim was the same but Ed had taken both of us aside as the tensions at the breakfast table had risen week after week and explained the little he knew to us, Ed explained that from what he knew, yes, it was possible now dad was found guilty that the courts could make him pay up big time for the financial losses that the collapse of the families insurance business had caused. We could be financially ruined.
Some of the kids at school had started bullying both Ed, Jim and even more so me, about dads trial and taunted us all that soon we would be "working class boys or that we were "sons of a criminal"
Both Ed and Jim were much more physical and dominant than me and it helped them at this time, the guys at school soon realised I was an easier target and was not as capable of fighting back.
Guys who I though were my friends began to shun me, they were not the ones actually bullying me but I could feel their embarisment when I was near them. They really didn't want to be associated with what they now perceived as a looser, a working class boy. In the past our families superior status had protected me, I now began to realise things were changing, I just didn't realise then just how much.
Ed broke the silence at the breakfast table by asking dad if today was the last day of the trial. Dad replies yes the Judge was handing down his verdict at 10am. You could tell in dads voice that he was more scared of today's events than he was trying to convey to us.
Mum then joined in the conversation, she asked " would you boys like to help your dad out today?"
"No Joanna I don't want them involved in this I've told you" dad interjected, but mum went on the offensive. "Eddy you know you need all the help we can get in that court room today, if the kids are there supporting you it will look good in front of the Judge.
This was new, we had never been involved in the trial at all, in fact we had been sheltered from most of the fallout as far as possible.
"Look at them Eddy if they appear in court in their HTGS uniforms it will send the right message to the Judge, you know, like you, he is a HTGS old boy.
Dad had to agree it made sense but he was very protective of us and was not sure it would be a good experience for us. We all said we were desperate to do anything to help and besides I though, a day off school was a bonus, I didn't add that thought of course.
This change in plans gave us boys some spare time on our hands, as we were not leaving for the court till 9.00am, so Ed suggested we bring forward Raymond's paddling. .Ed mentioned this to dad whose mind was on other more important things. He just shrugged and said "what ever you think Edward" then added, "your growing up so fast, a real man now aren't you"
Raymond was not impressed when we informed him that we had spare time and that Ed would conduct his paddling now. Ed ordered him into his study and told him to strip. Raymond didn't hesitate as he knew it was not appropriate to hesitate, he took off the Carter tunic, Carter shorts, Carter briefs and sandals and laid across a chair in Ed's study.
The site of his near naked body, he of course was still wearing his indentured servants collar, excited me I have to admit, I had only seen him naked once before at Ed's coming of age party. On that occasion like now you could see the red blush marks on Raymond's body. Servants are not supposed to be embarrassed about being naked but my father ran a very progressive household for his indentured servants and never forced servants to work naked. He even supplied proper underwear, which was not the norm for a lot of servants. I could sympathise with Raymond's blushing. I sure would have blushed if I were made to stand naked in front of others, especially if they were all younger than me, as was the case here.
Raymond had a good smooth taught body and as was tradition with servants he was shaved from neck to ankle. I wondered how much pubic hair was shaved off but it was hard to tell as he was beautifully clean shaven. This really highlighted his penis and balls. He wasn't well hung but who was I to complain, he was far better hung than myself at that time and I found looking at him naked made my pants begin to tent, so I quickly went and sat on the other chair. Jim I noticed had signs of a similar problem but both chairs were now occupied, so he just crouched forward to give his dick more room, pretending to be observing Raymond more closely.
Ed gave his usual energetic performance with the paddle and by the 5th stroke Raymond was crying slightly. We had all been taught of course that this is just what you want the servant to do, and once he does then you continue even harder so you force him through the pain to a new level of compliance. Ed did just this and did not stop till the maximum 10 stokes he was allowed by law to administer. Raymond was now really crying, his penis was fully erect much to my excitement, his body was covered in perspiration and he had snot running down his face from his nose.
Ed told him to go back to his quarters and clean up, but be back in 15 minutes to resume his duties with the right attitude. He went to pick up his clothes but I asserting my power over him, said "leave then you can put them on when you're clean, we don't want soiled clothing on our servant.
He almost said something but checked him self and bowed then left the room. I'm sure he heard Jim and I congratulating Ed on a job well done and deserved.
Ed informed Raymond once he returned and dressed that in all likely hood we would be back early today so he needed to have the suites finished by 1pm at the latest.
At 9am the family assembled at the front entrance, Dad in an imposing hand tailored dark suit, conservative red and dark blue tie, and white silk shirt. Mum in a stunning designer dress that like dads suit was made to fit and highlight her body. She looked stunning and we three boys were of course in our HTGS uniforms. The Bentley pulled in to pick us up and the servant chauffer came round and assisted us in to the vehicle, then we were all off as a family to support dad as the judge handed down his sentence.
The drive seemed to take for ever. Everyone was very sullen and no one said hardly anything. I was so nervous as we got to the courthouse, and I wasn't the one being sentenced. There were TV cameras everywhere from all the national and local stations and when we entered the courtroom the cable legal station was setting up to broadcast the sentencing live, such was the interest in this case. I tried to stay away from the cameras as I could not see any benefit in having my face broadcast across the nation.
Dads legal team had argued in their sentencing submission that dad should not have to bear the full financial liability for the collapse. They argued that he had a wife and children to support plus an extensive servant holding along with overseers who depended on his livelihood.
The prosecution submitted a firm but by no means draconian submission, mellowed through influential contacts in the high places my father and his legal team trod. The Prosecution argued that a firmer line had to be taken and they had asked the court to confiscate all dad's assets in part payment to all the suffering policy holders that had been effected. Dad's senior barrister said it could have been worse and he had ensured through the contacts that no indentured servitude order was asked for by the prosecution.
At precisely 10am the court was called to order and the Honourable Judge George Unwin took the gabble.
The clerk of the court stood and said " Edward Raymond Carter III please present yourself for sentencing. Dad rose from his seat and turned and kissed mum then clasped the hands of all three of us kids sitting behind him. It was a genuine clasp of my hands, even though it was also meant to focus the Judge on our family. I said to dad "good luck" and squeezed his hand tight. I had never felt closer to my dad than at that moment. When he finished with Jim, he turned and with as much dignity as he could muster, walked to stand before the Judge, he was escorted by two court sheriffs. As he stood there before the Judge, I though dad with all his dignity still looked worried and nervous standing there awaiting to receive his sentance. I was not used to seeing dad in such a powerless state.
Judge Unwin began his summing up.
" Edward Raymond Carter III you have been tried and convicted by a jury of your peers. I have listened to the arguments submitted on you behalf by the defence team and find them inadequate in compensating for the scale of loss suffered by the numerous policy holders of C.I.C. the company of which you were the Chief Executive. Responsibility ended with you and you failed to take that responsibility seriously and with due financial prudence. The prosecution has placed a strong argument that greater compensation for all the distraught and financially disadvantaged policy holders needs to be made by this court and I believe the community expects this court to impose a substantive sentence on you the person judged responsible for the collapse of C.I.C."
"I therefore order that all the assets of Edward Raymond Carter III are to be liquidated by the state and the funds raised used to partially compensate the effected policy holders. And due to the fact that I consider the communities concerns about this case to be stronger than the prosecutions presented sentencing request."
"I further order....'
I heard dad's senior barrister mutter "what the heck" to his colleague
"... that Edward Raymond Carter III is from this time forward stripped of his rights as a free citizen and indentured into criminal community servitude for the term of his natural life."
Everything happened at once.
My mother screamed "nooooooooooooooo !"
My brother Ed gasped.
Jim cried out "fuck you"
The packed courtroom gave a simultaneous inhalation of shock.
Dad turned and looked at his barrister with a look of complete fear and panic in his eyes and face, the barrister just shook his head and held his index finger up to his lips to indicate silence.
That chill that had been in my soul froze, then spread instantly over my whole body, my heart ached and felt like it had stopped beating.
The Judge banged his gabble and ordered the court to order.
Dad collapsed onto the floor.
The sheriffs standing at dads side didn't even try to catch him, they just let him fall to the floor. One court sheriff then walked to the defence bench and picked up a pitcher of water returned to dads prostrate body on the court room floor and very unceremoniously began tipping the water over my dads face and expensive suit whilst rudely commenting "wakey wakey servant boy".
When dad revived consciousness the other sheriff ordered "get to your feet now boy"
Judge Unwin again called the unruly court to order, then addressing the sheriffs ordered."` To emphasise his new status, a servant does not appear before a court in this jurisdiction clothed. Undress him!"
Dad just stood there totally shocked and as white as a ghost. To dads utter humiliation and mine but to murmurs from the courtroom, the sheriffs roughly removed his wet suit coat, tie, shirt, wedding ring, watch, shoes, socks, undid his belt removed his suit trousers and then the final humiliation his boxers. Dad tried to cover his genitals but one sheriff removed a prod from his belt and with a light jab sent an electric shock through my father forcing him to scream, whilst the other sheriff told dad servants didn't need to worry about modesty. That was a freemen's right.
One sheriff grabbed dads penis and lead him to the clerk of the courts desk where the clerk was busy typing into his computer. After a minute he produced a microchip, from a drive on his computer and placed it in the lock of a new servant collar. I knew from lessons at school all about servant collars and that this chip would contain all of dad's details including his new community service number. The collar was made of a metal chain coated in mesh and green and gold plastic with alternating red and light blue stripes. The design and colour indicated the status, state and country where the servant is registered. Dad's was Australia's green and gold with the thin light blue stripes of New South Wales and the red signified a lifetime criminal indenture.
I noticed how easily it went on, just a soft click
His arms were hand cuffed behind his back and then the ceremonial removal of dads pubic hair and pit hair was done by the other sheriff using a battery powered clipper. Dad just stood there looking totally broken, totally humiliated, totally embarrassed shoulders slumped standing amongst the small mounds of his dark blond pubic hair that were falling to the courtroom floor, his penis semi erect, his free life over.
Once completed the sheriffs made my father face the judge who then said, " As is tradition, I present to the public here represented at this court a new criminally indentured servant. Sheriffs parade the servant to the community."
With this order one of the sheriffs again grabbed dads penis and lead him around the court so all could see and inspect his naked body. I looked away in shame and my brothers and mum bowed their heads and we all cried, mum Ed Jim and me. However before I turned my head I noticed dad too was crying.
The final act in this scene of utter humiliation was when the Judge ordered dad taken to the cells for processing and shipment to the Northern Metropolitan Community Servitude Training Centre to start his new life. A life the Judge summed up that would consist till his dying breath of serving the community so that in some small way he could feel he had made amens for the financial grief so many had suffered.
The last I ever saw of my father was as he was taken down the steps inside the courtroom to the cells below and he glanced back, our eyes briefly met and I'm sure he saw in my eyes, my love, I hope and pray he did and that it gave him some strength to endure his new life. At that moment I loved my dad more than I had ever loved him before.
I was shattered. Why had I come?
Till this day I have not forgotten every detail of that morning. I have blamed and hated Judge Unwin for all that befell my family, till the hate rotted a permanent festering place in the very depths of my soul.
I can never forgive or forget him.
End Chapter 1.