Disclaimer:
This story contains homosexual themes. If you are offended by such topics or not of legal age to read such stories, please do not read on.
The names of characters and their engagements are fictitious. Any resemblances to real life are completely coincidental.
The author asserts all legal and moral rights to this work and it may not be copied or transmitted in any way except in its entirety along with this disclaimer.
MIDDLE MAN Chapter 2
"I uh... think I forgot them" Derek was sitting on the park bench, his elbows resting on his knees and his hands rubbing back and forth over his tired eyes. The girl and her lollypop were casting a shadow over his shoeless feet. He looked down at them for a moment and returned to searching his face with his hands. 'I have bigger things to worry about', he thought.
The events of that morning were creating a crevice of guilt inside him, leaving Derek with a sour taste in his mouth. With each nuance of his hips, his ass ached from the earlier presence of another man inside him. He stopped moving the lower part of his body and fought the memory of thick hair, the smell of vanilla and sesame seed oil and eyes that could question him whilst putting him in his place.
Derek couldn't remember ever being intentionally cruel to anyone. The look on George's face after seeing the two of them was now indelible on his memory. But Derek was also sure that those eyes would always be on his mind, no matter how much he tried to rub them from his thoughts.
"Are you lost? Is that why your shoes are gone?" asked the little girl. Derek had almost forgotten that she still stood before him, but noticed that she continued to speak from behind sweet. The swirls of green and white on the lollypop, went with the white and red dotted dress the girl was wearing.
Derek wanted to say 'Go away' maybe even with a 'please' added at the end, whichWould have been childish, not to mention mean.
Instead he went with "Yeah, I think so."
He wanted to be alone. Quietly.
"You think a lot." The girl was still standing in front of him, frowning at him and tugging at her hair.
Derek began to wonder if he had walked into the park that was familiar to him, or a realm unknown to him. It was at that moment his head started pounding, the way it usually did when he was too wound up.
"Not lately. Where are your parents? Maybe you should get back to them." Derek spoke to her calmly.
"When I think too much I'm sleepy. Are you sleepy? You look sleepy. Maybe you should sleep an' after you won't be lost an' you can find your shoes." The girl looked behind her and pointed, to where she thought her mother was located. "Mom's over there."
Instead her eyes widened, when she saw a woman walking over tothem, in awkward, fast pace.
"Oh oh."
Despite looking slightly scared, the little girl still kept chewing on her lollypop.
Before the woman had reached them, she whispered loudly, "Connie!"
"Hi Mom" the girl said in her best mock shy fashion. Derek breathed an inaudible sigh of relief.
Panting, the woman ran one hand through her hair and took Connie's hand. She bent down to look sternly into her daughter's eyes "What have I told you about running off? We've talked about this." Her tone was intimidating,but Derek could hear the panic in her voice, which Connie wouldn't pick on until years later.
"I'm sorry but..." Connie attempted.
"No, no sorries." The mother continued looking into her daughter's eyes, sending her what Derek guessed was some telepathic message parents have with their kids. Derek looked at the two of them whilst he was still bent over, holding on to the sides of his head and wondering if he should leave.
"What about strangers?" the mother went on, "You're dad and I talked to you about this."
'I'm right here' Derek thought to himself, as noted how alike the pair of them looked. He could almost see how the mother's facial features were once arranged and how her daughter's would be one day. She looked a little younger than Derek, maybe late twenties, he thought. They both had auburn hair, hazel eyes, strong noses and chins. Judging from the mother's height, the little girl was going to be quite tall. Even sitting down, Derek saw that the mother was taller than his own 5'9 height.
"I'm sorry, I am. But..." the girl paused for a second, now genuinely close to tears and looked at Derek before returning her eyes back at her mother. After mentally making a decision, the girl pulled on her mother's arm, despite the fact that the woman was already straining from bending over.
It then appeared as if Connie was secretly telling her mother's ear something. Something, Derek guessed about him. His assumption aided by the fact that after whatever Connie had said, both mother and daughter were then perusing him intently.
'Seriously' he thought to himself, 'where am I?'
After absorbing whatever had been divulged to her the woman returned her gaze back to her daughter. "Then just tell me and I'll go with you. Not on your own." She said.
"Ok" Connie replied solemnly.
"Ok" the mother said in agreement, in a lighter tone bending back up. Derek suddenly felt really small.
"This is my mom." Connie said proudly, her mood also clearly better. She leaned against her mother, using one hand to hold hers whilst returning her attention to her lollypop.
The woman turned to him and reached out her hand "I'm..." she began introducing herself, but was soon stopped.
"No, let me." Connie grinned up at her mother.
"And running away?" asked her mother, returning to reason.
"I have to let you know where I am at all times." Connie repeated in a tone that suggested she had had those words said to her many times before.
"Go ahead." The woman said whilst shaking her head and pulling her daughter's head against her hip.
"This is Sandrona Thermopolis Richards," Connie declared as if standing in front of a huge array of people.
"I'm Rona and this walking heart attack is Constance." Derek shook her proffered hand.
"Mom's gonna have a babies" Connie almost squealed.
"Baby?" Derek asked, still dazed.
"No." Connie said, putting up a peace sign "Babies."
"Oh, congratulations." His tone not convincing anyone, even as he noted the Rather round bump attached to the middle of Connie's mother. 'Why didn't I see that before?' Derek asked himself.
Despite the recognition of her state Rona could see that the handsome man before her had other things on his mind. His brown eyes carried confusion, anger and something else, she couldn't pick up on. He looked like he had some muscle to his frame,even with the coat on. However, he also seemed to be caving into himself.
"Well, feel better" Rona told him as she tugged on her daughter's hand, turning away "Come on sweetie, the...?"
"Derek."
"Derek, looks like he wants to be alone right now." Rona continued. 'Thank God for grown ups' Derek thought.
"Oh ok" Connie said looking disappointed, before smiling again. "Maybe he wants us to sit with him."
"Maybe later" Rona, frowned apologetically and at Derek, silently mouthing "I'm sorry."
Watching them retreat, Derek decided to forgo past tendencies towards normal behaviour and laid down on his back, with his right arm cushioning his head, whilst his left relaxed across his stomach. The sky above his supine body was clear of any clouds, a perfect blue. Somewhere around him birds were chirping. His bare feet were cooling from the right amount of breeze floating around.
Moving his head to the right, Derek looked beyond the horizontal unblocked gaps on the bench and spied a squirrel, which was looking around suspiciously at the possibility of anything stealing its nuts. A little further back ducklings were sitting around their mother.
Derek shut his eyes from the scene, only to find that the images emerging were even worse. Two beautiful men, one with whom he had shared his life and the other whose name was still unknown to him. When he came back that morning all he wanted to do was surprise George, 'maybe get laid' Derek thought, a sardonic smile spreading across his face. Maybe reconnect with him a little.
He can see himself walking into his bedroom that morning and seeing the two of them, the scent of the room as he stood in the doorway was all the evidence he had, but he knew. It felt like so long ago, like a wound he'd had for a long time, despite having only happened that morning.
Then Derek remembered sweat, moaning, morning breath twisting around coffee breath, clinging to a stranger for dear life and the oddest green eyes keeping him afloat.
Derek opened his eyes and sat up too quickly, needing to hold his head as a result. At that moment he wished for the comfort of privacy as he was falling apart. He knew that a few people must have been staring at him. A grown man in a winter coat in the heat, close to tears with no shoes, was not a sight easily overlooked.
"You look suicidal. Come sit with us" a cautious face was staring back at him. The mother: Rona. Bluntness must be genetic, Derek thought, he could understand where the daughter got it from.
"Umm."
"You shouldn't be alone right now, whatever it is" Rona continued, looking a bit tired, her hair shining under the afternoon sun.
"Do I look that bad?" Derek asked. He was only half joking and half hoping to hear the expected white lie in response.
"Kinda, yeah" Rona replied truthfully. She watched as Derek's gaze moved behind her. Her eyes followed, stopping at a couple dozing on the grass nearby. At that moment Derek was asking himself if his bed would be comfortable with only his weight to handle. When Rona returned her attention back to him, she caught Derektrying to crush the possibility of crying in public.
"You need some tea, come on" Rona said, talking in that voice, which made you feel comforted but with no doubt that the words were an order.
Soon Derek found himself sitting with Rona and her daughter drinking chamomile tea.He had never warmed to the drink, however, he reconciled that since his senses weren't as sharp, he might as well. In truth he was glad, humbled almost that a stranger would want to pay attention to him. He had three cups in all.
"Here, try this" Rona instructed, handing Derek a plate filled with sandwiches, fried chicken, potato salad and tomatoes. It was only when the food appeared on his plate that he noticed two baskets filled with food, some of it laid out on the yellow checkered blanket.
"Do you always bring this much food with you to the park?" Derek asked, only to hear his stomach rumble. He ate and then ate, stopping once he realized that he was attempting to feel as full as possible.
"That was really good, thanks. Thank you both."
"You're welcome" Rona smiled at him.
"Yeah, welcome" Connie echoed.
Derek sat quietly, cross legged, his elbows on his knees. He looked around him again, feeling like a single thorn on an award winning rose. Looked at everything he wanted to appreciate but couldn't. Then thought about everything he wanted to change and came to the same effect. Then he gave in to everything that had happened, which is how he found himself crying. Crying in the middle of the perfect day.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Connie cling to her mother.
"I'm usually more stable than this, especially around people." Derek tried to hide his tears, to no avail.
Rona watched him, and then went back to trying to feed her daughter. But she spoke to Derek as she was working.
"Hey...the first time I met my husband I puked on him...a lot. There was a hideousamount of vomit involved." Her face was frowning from the memory. "The first time we saw Connie here; she looked awful until they cleaned her up"
Connie nodded in agreement with a sandwich her mother was feeding her and her lollypop held casually in her hand.
"Everyone's a mess at some point" Rona said, pausing to pull some hair out of her daughter's face "so you're gonna be ok." She looked back at him, her hazel eyes telling his that he should believe her.
Derek really wanted to. Three hours later he said goodbye to the mother daughter pair.Taking with him the food Rona insisted he have and her words.
'Your going to be ok' became his new mantra. Those words got him back to his house. They kept him calm as he surveyed the missing items inside his home. They reminded him to shower, eat, change his sheets, and take out the garbage.
'You're going to be ok' was what he clung to in order to get through the week that followed. When his working week started he knew that the word 'OK' wasn't mediocre, it was unaccredited. Derek would be the firstto admit that it had probably saved his life.
TBC
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