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Chapter 42
JW woke up to his alarm clock, quietly went into the bathroom and brushed his teeth. After stepping out of the bathroom JW walked into the bedroom with Marcus laying in bed with his eyes open, "Sorry dude didn't mean to wake you."
Marcus moaned, "Don't worry about it, cant wait for this school year to be over with so I can sleep in."
JW laughed, "Need me to call you in an hour and wake you back up?"
Marcus shook his head and stretched, "Ill get up now, me and Luke will take a nap later today." JW nodded his head and walked out the door saying good-bye.
The drive to work for JW was uneventful and he hoped it would be another slow day. But after thirty-five minutes of the start of the shift JW's department got sent to a house fire. JW rolled his eyes and hurried over to put on his gear. It was almost noon before they were back at the station, as usual JW being the junior man he was the last guy to get into the showers.
JW stripped down, tossed his cloths onto the bench and stepped into the shower. JW showered quickly and stepped out to towel himself off, as JW finished drying his hair quickly he pulled on his bright red trunks when one of the guys on his shift walked into the shower and met JW's eyes with Mack, "Well god damn. Those don't scream anything about you."
JW rolled his eyes and turned his back to Mack and slapped his own ass, "You know you want it but just remember there is no promotion involved."
Mack laughed and walked away shaking his head. JW almost had a heart attack, he thought to himself how hard it would be with out his gay Captains protection. JW shook his head and pulled on his pants and saw Mack out of the corner of his eye, JW pulled on his boots and said, "So you reconsidered did you?"
"John what the fuck are you talking about?" JW looked up and saw his Captain Shane.
JW finished tying his boots, "Sorry I thought you were Mack."
Mack laughed as he walked out of the bathroom, "No you only wish it was me."
Shane looked around puzzled, "What's that about?"
JW shook his head and put on his shirt and was about to button it up when Shane said in a whisper, "Hold on for just a second."
JW looked at him stupidly and froze. Shane grinned, stared at JW's abs and said, "Get dressed I would like to talk with you while you finish going through the trucks." JW nodded his head.
JW walked down stairs and knocked on the office window of Shane, Shane stood up and followed JW into the engine bays. Shane grabbed JW by the arm and whispered, "First off I really want to apologize for staring at you when getting out of the shower. That was extremely rude of me and beyond unprofessional. It will never happen again, your just extremely handsome man and you got the best of me."
JW smiled, "I know you meant nothing by it, so no worries!"
Shane looked relieved, "Again I am sorry. The main reason I am out here is that I think we are going to do our BBQ in four weeks, when we are off for a weekend. You still interested in coming over?"
JW smiled, "Of course, just let me know when, where and what to bring."
Shane grinned, "Well honestly I was hoping you would bring that boy friend of yours. Oh and swim suits, we have a pool."
JW smiled, "Sounds awesome! How many people will be there?"
Shane looked up and counted to himself, "Honestly I don't know. Around twenty if everyone shows up. Couple of the guys from here are coming over."
JW raised an eyebrow and Shane started to laugh, "Not what you think. This is a friendly pool party not a gay beach party." Shane and JW laughed together. It only took JW about an hour to finish going through the trucks when JW and Shane walked back to the office and sat down and talked for the next few hours.
JW could not believe how much he enjoyed being around Shane; they exchanged stories and talked about JW's kids. Shane talked about being gay and still working in the fire department and how hard it was for almost twenty years in the closet at work before finally coming out. JW showed Shane a picture he took of Marcus on his phone. Shane looked back to JW and congratulated him on finding such a handsome man. Suddenly the station was toned to a car accident on the interstate and the conversation was over with them rushing to their gear.
The calls kept coming in and the station was busy till almost 3:00am. By the time they got back, everyone went to lay down except Shane and JW who stayed down in the bays to talk for the rest of the shift. At 6:30am JW went upstairs to shower and Shane followed him. JW got very nervous and did not know what to think of this and didn't want to think of the possible repercussions.
As they walked into the shower Shane promised JW that it was nothing more than a shower and JW tried to relaxed. They continued their talk from down stairs in the shower stalls. JW made a point to stay in the shower longer than Shane and hoped that he would just go back down to his office. JW herd Shane's shower shut off and waited for Shane to leave, but JW could not tell if he was gone. After several more minutes he knew he had to get out of the shower, so he turned off his shower and stepped out of the shower nervously.
Shane was nowhere to be seen, JW wrapped a towel around his waist and looked around quickly. Then he herd the locker on the opposite wall close shut, JW sighed in relief and started to dry off his body as Shane walked out of the bathroom. JW quickly put on his underwear and as JW was putting his pants back on the shower door was kicked open and it was Shane with a grin.
JW almost fell over from being shocked by the door being opened rapidly. Shane smiled, "I am a horrible person but I wanted to see those abs again!" JW gathered his feet and stood up tall, spread his arms back and flexed his abs hard. Shane grinned hard, turned and walked away. Before JW left for the day Shane caught him again and promised him it was nothing more than a simple look.
JW laughed, "Shane there is nothing wrong with looking. I just hope it's an innocent lookÉ"
Shane quickly interrupted, "Nothing more and nothing less. Please don't think it is anything more?"
On the drive home JW thought about Shane and what he was doing; even though it was done in fun it could possibly develop into a serious problem. JW laughed to himself and cussed under his breath for how long he had feared Shane and now it was the farthest thing from what he originally thought. JW decided to talk to Shane about it the next time he could catch him in a good mood. The drive passed quickly as JW thought about Shane and pulling into the driveway he decided to ask Marcus what to do about the situation.
The garage door closed and JW walked inside, saw the empty living room and figured Marcus must be in bed. JW pushed open Luke's bedroom door and saw he was not in bed; JW's heart skipped a beat as he pushed open his bedroom door. Luke turned to him and cried loudly in happiness and screamed, "Dada Home!"
JW could not believe how much Luke was learning each day, before long he would be in that stage when its no longer cute but really annoying because the kids don't know when to stop talking. Marcus rolled over in the bed and greeted JW sleepily. JW picked up Luke and walked into the bathroom to brush his teeth. JW talked to Luke for several minutes after he was done brushing his teeth, Luke was quickly bored and started to explore and look around the bathroom. JW dropped his clothes and slipped into gym shorts JW picked up Luke and carried him to the bed. JW laid down, rolled over on his stomach and as soon as Luke laid down in between Marcus and himself, JW went to sleep.
JW woke up to the sound of running footsteps in the hall way and the girls throwing their things onto the floors in their room. JW stretched his hands above his head and yawned, he looked down and saw the hard on and felt like jerking off. But JW climbed out of bed and walked into the bathroom to brush his teeth. JW walked into the living room wearing the same gym shorts and sat down next to Leah and Kira who were on the couch, "So who is ready for summer break?"
The girls both screamed, "Me!" together.
JW smiled, wrapped his arms around JW and he pulled them in tight. JW talked to girls and got an idea of what they wanted to do this summer. In the back of JW's mind he was thinking about a vacation for the girls but what to do? The typical Disney Land vacation for the girls or something else?
Suddenly JW thought about his parents and ex in-laws. JW stood back up walked into his room and grabbed his cell phone, he dialed the number to his ex in-laws, "Hey Pete, its JW. I have not herd from you guys in a few weeks and was wondering how you were doing?"
Marcus walked into the bedroom smiling and JW held up his hand and mouthed, `Hold on.' Pete and JW talked for several minutes and Marcus sat on the bed and listened to them. JW hung up the phone, walked over and pushed Marcus onto his back and climbed on top of him and started to kiss him, "I have missed you so much."
Marcus and JW exchanged a long passionate kiss when JW sat up, "Pete and Barbra are coming over for dinner tonight. I think they are going to take the kids for the weekend. We need to also talk about what our plans are for the summer. I really want the kids to go see my parents at their place some time this summer as well, they have never been there." Marcus nodded his head and grabbed JW by the arms and pulled him back down on top of himself and started kissing JW again.
Leah was standing at the door and had been watching them kiss before she finally said, "Dad!"
JW jumped off Marcus and was flushed red from embarrassment, "Sorry Leah, what's up?"
Leah climbed on the bed, "Oh nothing I was just seeing what you two were doing. Guess you're busy?"
Marcus laughed, "We are never to busy for you Leah. Hey we were talking about going to the gym to workout, you want to go swimming afterwards?"
Leah nodded her head and Marcus said, "Well go get your sisters and get ready then."
Leah bounced off the bed and JW threw his head back into the bed, "Fuck its so embarrassing when they catch us. Sorry I am just not comfortable being affectionate in front of the kids."
Marcus shrugged, "Its fine dude, give it time. The girls seem to be fine with it."
JW ran his hands through his hair, "For now, but when they get older? They will know what gay men do to each other."
Marcus didn't know what to say and started to climb off the bed, JW grabbed his arm and pulled him back to his body, "I am sorry, just give me time."
JW kissed Marcus one last time and climbed off the bed with him. As they were getting dressed for the gym Marcus walked over to JW's dresser and pulled out a pair of the jock strap underwear and tossed them at JW, "Gotta wear these."
JW laughed and said, "No way."
Marcus gave a exaggerated sad face and frowned, JW rolled his eyes and put on the underwear thinking in the back of his head that no one would actually wear these in public. JW packed a swimsuit for Luke and grabbed a bunch of towels and everyone piled into the car with Marcus grabbing Luke.
They pulled into the parking lot of the gym and the girls took Luke into the kids area. Marcus and Luke hit the gym and JW told Marcus about the new workout and Marcus followed JW. Over an hour later Marcus was with JW back in the locker room and rubbing his tired arms and shoulders, "Dude I had no idea you were going to step it up that much. What the hell has gotten into you about the gym anyways?"
JW smiled, "I just want to be the hottest guy I can be for my lover!"
Marcus rolled his eyes, "Your already the hottest guy in here, wish you would realize that."
JW laughed, "Second hottest."
Marcus laughed as he watched JW strip out of his sweaty gym clothes and hanged his jock strap underwear in his locker. As JW walked by Marcus grabbed him and pushed him hard into the locker and started to kiss JW, Marcus hands went to cup JW's ass and spread his ass. The locker room door opened with a squeak and Marcus pushed off JW who was smiling. JW pulled on a shirt and walked out of the locker room with a towel over his shoulder, his swim trunks were slightly tented.
JW got the kids and told the girls to change real quick, JW changed Luke while Marcus waited for the girls.
Marcus and JW each took their turn holding Luke while the other played with girls. After an hour in the pool Marcus and JW moved to the hot tub and put Leah in charge of Luke in the kiddy pool, the kiddy pool was only a few feet away and JW and Marcus sat where they could both watch the kids.
Marcus and JW soaked up the heat of the water into their tired muscles for another thirty minutes when JW climbed out of the pool and gathered up the kids. After changing JW, Marcus and Luke waited outside the girl's locker room for Leah and Kira, JW had to send a lady walking by into the locker room to check on the girls and get them out. The woman returned laughing and said they will be out shortly. Finally the girls walked out of the locker room talking to each other completely ignoring Marcus and JW. They just looked at each other and shrugged and followed the girls to the car.
As everyone was buckled down in the car JW turned to the girls, "So what took so long Leah?"
Leah just smiled, "Kira just had questions and I answered them."
JW looked to Marcus who raised his eyebrows, JW turned back to Leah, "What was Kira asking?"
Marcus started to the car and started the drive home while Leah explained how Kira didn't understand why JW and Marcus slept together, had sex together and why there were no girls around them. JW looked pale as a ghost by the time they got home from the short drive. As everyone unloaded from the car and made their way inside and JW sat down on the couch and looked back at the ceiling as he laid back.
Marcus walked by and JW asked him to take Luke into the room so he could talk to Leah and Kira together. Marcus thought he should probably stay but didn't want to interfere with JW and his kids, Marcus took look into Luke's bedroom to get him changed.
JW called Leah and Kira over and started to talk to them. After several minutes JW tried to relax but realized his girls had more questions than he was prepared to answer. Kira particularly seemed unhappy or just confused and JW knew that he was going to just have to wait till she was a little older to fully explain why he was living with Marcus and why he loved Marcus so much.
Leah did her best to explain things to Kira, JW was thankful she ever tried even though she obviously didn't fully understand what was going on either. JW thought the conversation was over with when Kira hit him with a question and really confused him, "Dad but you have sex with Marcus right?"
JW wanted to vomit, Kira was only five and there was no way she under stood what sex was much less the complications of a relationship and then the complications of a gay relationship in today's culture. Marcus walked up behind JW, put his hands on his shoulders, "Kira I know it seems funny to you that me and your dad are together. But what if I told you that I love your dad as much as he loves you?"
Kira made a funny face, "Prove it?"
Marcus smiled and walked around the couch and sat down next to JW who looked pretty pissed off, "Why Kira?"
Kira crossed her arms, "Well I just want dad to be happy! But it is hard to tell he is happy."
JW turned his head to Kira, "Is that what this is about?"
Kira looked to Leah and Leah turned to JW, "I know you think we don't know anything but we see how much you changed since you got with Marcus. Kira just does not see why you guys are happy."
Marcus grabbed JW's hand and squeezed hard, "So Kira you see us together and do not understand why?"
Kira nodded her head. Marcus quickly turned JW's head and kissed him. JW immediately pulled his head back and looked like he was ready to punch him, the girls together started laughing. Kira grabbed JW's arm, "Dad I don't care. I really don't!"
Marcus went in for another kiss but JW pulled his head back as the girls laughed, JW turned to Marcus and said angrily, "Seriously stop right now."
Kira in a squeaky voice said, "No! If that is what makes you happy then don't stop."
Marcus went in for a kiss and this time JW did not reject him but it was a short kiss. JW turned to his girls, "There happy now?"
The girls giggled and bounced off the couch and ran down the hallway, Kira turned and said, "Daddy got a kiss!" JW chased after his girls laughing, Marcus laid his head back and closed his eyes.
Marcus felt JW sit down next to him relax his body and sighed heavily, "I swear to god one of these days I am going to beat the fuck out of you!"
Marcus gave a wicked smile, "What?"
JW shook his head and walked into the kitchen, "You push me on things. I fucking hate that. Marcus don't think I won't leave you over my kids, you don't know what's best for them when it comes to me being gay and trying to talk to them about that."
JW walked back into the living room, handed Marcus a glass of water and sat down in the armchair staring at the floor. Marcus started to say something but JW cut him off, "I hope you realize how serious I am, in fact this is the last time, if I tell you stop, then you better shut your fucking mouth and stop what your doing."
Marcus blinked at JW who was looking at the floor, "You know what if your going to be like thatÉ"
JW head turned to face him, JW spoke in almost a whisper, "You fucking bet I am going to be like that, I know what you're doing right now I won't let you turn the kids against me like my ex did."
Marcus gritted his teeth and clenched his fists, "Well maybe that is what you did to Connie, you just started to tell her what she could and could not do. But she just fucking ignored you because your a god damn idiot, then you wouldn't stand up for yourself. So she stood up for you, she just got tired of carrying your ass and tossed you out on the curb." JW raised an eyebrow but didn't say a word.
Marcus narrowed his eyes, "That's right bitch."
Marcus stood up and walked into the kitchen and dumped the water out in the sink, he regretting everything he just said and knew he fucked up. Marcus hung his head and walked out to the living room to apologize. JW was gone, he moved from the living room. Marcus stood in silence and listened around the house. Nothing, the only thing he heard was the girls talking in their bedroom. Marcus watched Lucas walk out of their bedroom. Marcus herd a dresser drawer close, Marcus walked into bedroom and saw envelope sitting on the bed, the shower was turned on, Marcus reached down and opened the letter and started to read it.
Marcus read the first sentence and knew it was a suicide note. Marcus pushed open the shower door and saw JW sitting in the shower with a long straight razor. JW looked up at him, "Look what your bitch is doing now!"
Marcus watched JW sink the long polished silver razor deep into the inside of thigh, blood rushing out of his cut femoral artery, JW had a faint smile towards Marcus. JW bleed out quickly and died.
Marcus jerked awake and herd laughing in the kitchen, he looked around confused and still on the couch. Marcus was drenched in sweat and shaking, Marcus looked into the kitchen again and saw JW sitting with Pete and Barbra. Marcus stood up, ran his hands through his hair and sighed in relief. Marcus walked into the kitchen with a fake smile and said hello. JW pulled out a chair and Marcus sat down next to him, Pete looked at Marcus, "You look horrible, are you getting sick?"
Marcus tried to laugh and shook his head, "No actually I just had a horrible dream and it looked and felt so real. Honestly it really bothered me." JW stood up and grabbed Marcus a glass of water, Marcus ran his hands down his face, put his elbows on the table and held his head. JW returned and handed the glass to Marcus who drank the whole glass and set it down.
Everyone was looking at him and staring when Barbra finally said, "Are you going to tell us what happened or are we going to guess?"
Marcus looked around and made sure the kids were not close and started recalling the dream starting with their fight. Pete and Barbra looked at each other while JW stared at Marcus, JW coughed nervously, "That is pretty messed up."
JW turned to Barbra, "You do realize I would never do that right?"
Barbra gasped, "Well I hope not! Jesus the kids have been through enough, that would devastate them."
Pete nodded his head, "Well it's just a dream anyways." Pete looked at Marcus, "Pretty screwed up though."
Marcus nodded his head and grabbed JW's hand, "Just seemed so real is all. It really did scareÉ JW pleaseÉ" Marcus paused and looked around the table, "Don't ever hesitate to tell me to stop what I am doing, don't ever hesitate to ask anyone for help or for an opinion. The same goes for me as well, JW I always want to know what you think. It is important that we talk to each other."
JW smiled, "And I don't?"
Barbra laughed, "JW it's rare to hear you talk. You talk more now than you ever did with Connie around. In fact it's good to see you come out of your shell. Before you seemed like such anÉ"
Pete cut Barbra off, "You came across as an ass is what she is saying."
JW shook his head, "Everyone says that, I talk a lot, ask Marcus."
Marcus sat there holding in a laugh, "Recently? Yes more than usual, but you're still pretty quiet." JW rolled his eyes and leaned back in the chair.
Pete and Barbra left for the evening much later than expected. Marcus cleaned up the kitchen while JW cleaned up the house and threatened life and limb on his daughters till their rooms were cleaned and they had showered. Marcus finished long before JW and had Luke in his bedroom laying on bed and playing with him, "How the hell did you finish the kitchen and get Luke showered before the girls finished?"
Marcus shrugged, "I have no problem with them when your not here. The girls do their stuff right away."
JW looked into Kira's room, "Why do you listen to Marcus and not me?"
Kira giggled and dived onto her bed, "Because he is scary and you won't do anything no matter how scary you try to be."
JW rolled his eyes and ran into Kira's room laughing and tickling Kira, "You will fear me from this day on."
Kira laughed and kicked her legs wildly, "Still not scared dad."
JW picked Kira up, put her over his shoulder and carried her to his bedroom. Leah came running in behind him and did a face plant into the bed as she dived in besides Marcus. JW told them to pick a movie and they would watch it together. Kira picked a Pixar movie that everyone had seen at least a thousand times, but as soon as the movie started everyone settled down.
When the movie finished JW and Marcus grabbed the kids and put them to bed. With Luke tucked into bed Marcus walked into the living room with JW and sat down on the couch next to him. JW tried to put his arm around Marcus but he was too tall, they laughed and Marcus slumped lower in the couch and rested his head on JW's shoulder.
They sat in silence for several minutes when JW finally said, "So you thought the dream was real?"
Marcus nodded his head, "I am still bothered by it."
JW shook his head, "Well that just needs to be a sign that we need to communicate better, we will have ups and downs, just have to communicate or we are doomed."
Marcus nodded his head and JW continued, "Well I have been invited to my first gay party."
Marcus looked up to JW started laughing, "You?"
JW went on to explain Shane his station Captain invited him. Marcus was excited and explained the details on the party. After talking about the party and how to get JW prepared for the coming pool party, JW asked him about Shane and the shower incident. Marcus laughed and told him it was nothing more than a gay mans complement and to get use to it because even though he never noticed a lot of people stare at a hottie. JW just shook his head and disagreed.