My name is Ryan. I am 17 and gay. I am around 6 feet tall, fairly skinny but not without some muscle. I have short, spikey brown hair and brown eyes. I wear glasses, but not ugly ones.
I was walking through the crowded hallways of my high school, on my way to English I think, when I saw him. He was one of the most beautiful people I had ever seen. He had blonde hair that feel over his eyes just a little, but not so much as to completely cover his pierced eyebrow. He was one of the most beautiful people I had ever seen. I turned to my friend Lauren, who was walking with me. "Hey, Lauren, do you know him?" I asked excitedly, pointing to the boy. "No, why?" she asked casually. "Never mind," I said sadly. "I have to go to class." I walked the rest of the way to my English class and took my seat. I don't really remember what happened in class that day; of course my mind was elsewhere. The rest of the day was boring like usual, no more sightings of my mystery man. After school, I was hanging out with Lauren in the cafeteria, waiting for color guard rehearsal to start and suddenly, he walked in. He surprised me so much that I blurted out something as he walked by. He smiled at me cutely and said "Hey." And then turned around and walked away. I would see him in the halls every once in awhile but I didn't talk to him again for weeks. One Friday night, a month or so after the cafeteria incident, I was at a high school football game. We had come off the field after marching our show and I was behind the stands putting up my flag and rifle. I was zipping up my bag when my friend Rachel came running up to me. "HEY!" she yelled. "Hey," I said, with some annoyance. "Lets go get a drink." She said happily. "I don't have any money," "Ok well, lets walk around." "Ok." So we walked around the stadium a bit, wasting time. We were walking over to a group of our friends and he walked by and again he gave me that cute little smile. I was sitting in the stands later on, thinking about my mystery man and apparently the game ended without my knowing because my friend Emily suddenly yelled at me and kicked me in the leg. "What the heck was that for," I said confused. "The game is over, we're leaving," "Oh, okay." "What were you thinking about" "Nothing." I lied. "Sure," she said. I went home, hopped into bed and dreamt about my mystery man. Days went by and the quarter ended. On the first day of the new quarter, I was sitting in my biology class waiting for class to start. "Class," yelled the teacher. "Your daily question is on the board, get started." None of us really like our teacher. She was a nice person but an awful teacher. Suddenly, in he walked. I thought he was here to deliver a note but he walked in, went up to the teacher and sat down in the seat right next to me. My heart beat faster and faster. "Hi," he said. "My name is Matt." He stuck out his hand for me to shake. I took it saying, "H-h-hey," as calmly as possible, "My name is Ryan." "Nice to meet you" he said then he looked down at the assignment we were given and began working. I couldn't help but notice how soft his hands were. I wanted to kiss him so badly. He was just so beautiful. Over the next few weeks he and I became friends. One day we were writing a note back and forth and he asked me if I wanted to hang out with him after school. I said sure, but I would have to check with my mom. After class I ran to the office and called my mom, she told me it was fine just to make sure he could take me to her office so I could get a ride home. I ran to my locker and put my stuff in my bag and went to the parking lot to meet him. I got in his car and we took off. I was extremely nervous. My legs were shaking and my hands sweating. He didn't mention any of it and we drove to his house and went into his room. It had posters all over the walls except for one, which had his name in spray paint art. On the floors were colored pencils, paper, his violin and a guitar. "Sorry my room is so messy," He said, with a small amount of nervousness evident in his voice. "Its ok, my room is worse," I said. Not very much of importance happened, we just hung out and drove around town until I had to go to my moms work. When we got to her work I took my stuff out of his trunk, closed it and went inside, hollering to him: "See you later Matt!" And I could make out, as he was speeding off: "Later man!" In my mother's office, she decided she needed to interrogate me. "Who is Matt?" she asked "My friend," I said, annoyed with her. "Ryan, are you gay?" she asked, with some apprehension. "W-w-what are you talking about, I'm not gay." I lied. "So Matt isn't your...boyfriend." She asked almost in a whisper. "NO!" I yelled, storming out of her office. For the next three days Matt wasn't at school, and when he finally was back on Friday, he wouldn't talk to me. During biology that afternoon I wrote him a note, asking what was wrong. I gave it to him and he read it. After a minute or two he threw it in the trashcan. Thankfully the bell rang a few minutes later because I wasn't able to stop the tears from coming. I ran from the room with odd looks from the teacher and the few remaining students. That weekend I spent in my room, crying. I didn't want to go back to school the following Monday. I know I still looked depressed on Monday because my friends came up to me all day asking if I was ok. I told them all the same thing: that I didn't get a lot of sleep that weekend so I was really tired. In biology that whole week Matt wouldn't even look at me, which didn't help my mood very much. It was about two weeks before break started, and I was finally almost over him. I at least stop crying my self to sleep at night. I was standing in the cafeteria one day, waiting for my friend's mom to pick us up so we could go to her house, and he came up to me and shoved a piece of paper my hand. He had an odd look on his face but he didn't say anything, he just gave me the paper and left. I sat down and opened it up to find eight words. "We need to talk, come to my car". I had no idea what he wanted but I knew that I had to go. I explained it to my friend and told her I was sorry to ditch her and that I would get a ride home. I ran to the parking lot once again. I found him sitting in his car. "Get in" he said So I got in and he took off. We got a few miles from the school and he broke down crying. "I am so sorry. I've treated you like shit lately," he cried. "What's going on?" I asked "I am so sorry," he cried again. "I get that, now please tell me what the hell is going on!" "Ok, ok I'll tell you." He said, the tears finally coming to an end, "I like you." Never had three words shaken me so much. "W-what" I managed to get out. "I like you, ever since the first time I saw you in the hall." He said, tear welling up in his eyes again. "If you like me, then why did you ignore me for so long?" I asked, starting to get angry. "I was confused, I haven't had feelings towards another guy before. I never liked girls but you are the first guy I have liked and it confused me so much." He said, tears rolling down his cheeks. Some how, during this part of our conversation we managed to drive to his house. He parked in the driveway and turned off the car. "That day when we hung out, I wanted so badly to kiss you and hold you in my arms and those thoughts scared me." He said. "Wow!" was all I could get out. "I have spent the last few weeks thinking about it all and I finally decided, I like you and I want you to be my boyfriend." He said. I couldn't say anything; I just sat there looking at him. He got the cutest smile on his face and said, "So will you be my boyfriend?" "I-I-I...YES!" I finally managed to say. And his whole face broke into a beautiful smile. "Lets go inside." He said. He got out and ran around and opened my door and we went inside. Once inside we went and sat down on the couch. "Lets watch a movie." He said "Okay." I replied quickly. He got up and put something in his DVD player, "What is it?" I asked He smiled and then leaned over and kissed me. "Wow, that wasn't what I expected," I blurted out. "What do you mean, you have never kissed anyone before?" he said, holding back a laugh. "No," I said shyly, looking away. He smiled again and leaned over and kissed me again, longer and more passionately this time. After breaking the kiss he put his arm around me and I cuddled up to him. I sat there for a while, with his arms around me just enjoying the feeling. The feeling of not being alone anymore, but I knew I need to call my mom and find out when I needed to be home. So I got the phone from Matt and called my moms cell. "Hey mom, what time do I need to be home?" I asked, yelling a little so she could understand me. "I don't know, where are you?" She asked, also yelling. "I am at Matt's," I said. "D-doing what?" She asked, apprehension dripping from her voice. "We're hanging out, what time do I need to be home?" I asked again, starting to get angry with her. "Just be home before ten." She said finally. I quickly hung up the phone. "What was that about?" Asked Matt, concerned. "Oh. My mother is convinced that I am gay," I said. "Umm...aren't you?" He said with a fake look of concern in his eye, "Because I don't know many straight men that make out with other guys." "Oh hush, you know what I mean." I said, "I am just not ready for her to know." He giggled cutely and we made out some more. Then I went back to being held by him and feeling content. We eventually started the movie he had put in so long ago and laid there together watching it. Then it grew dark and it was time for me to go, so we got in his car and he drove me to my house. "Thanks for driving me, but you know you didn't have to," I said. "I know, I wanted to drive you home, I like spending time with you," He said, a cute smile spreading over his face. When he got to the end of my rode he stopped the car. "I want to do this here so your mom won't see." He said, and he kissed me. We kissed for a long time and just sat there. He then started the car and drove the rest of the way to my house. I got out, looked back smiled and went inside. I went to bed quite happy that night and woke up very refreshed in the morning. Things were wonderful with Matt and I; we kept our relationship a secret since I was the only person who knew he was gay and not many knew for sure that I was. But even keeping it a secret we were happy. The holidays came and over break we spent as much time together as possible and we finally told Lauren because neither of us could keep the secret much longer. Then it was January and Valentines Day was fast approaching. So one day after school I dragged Lauren to her car and told her. "I don't know what to get him for Valentines Day, you have to help me," I said pleadingly. "Home much money do you have," she asked, and I told her. We drove around until I found a place that didn't appear to over priced "Find anything you like?" Asked the sales woman politely. And I did, I found the perfect thing, it was a silver ring with a crescent moon cut in the top. "I want that," I said pointing to the ring, "And can you engrave something on the inside?" "We most certainly can," She said, pulling out a slip of paper from beneath the desk, "What would you like it to say." "I want it to say...I love you with all my heart," I said, "And can you have it done by Valentines Day?" "Of course," She said, "Your girlfriend will love it." "Girlfriend?" I said, "I don't have a girlfriend." "What, oh...Oh, I see," she stuttered, "I can have it done by the 11th" "Ok, I'll come pick it up then." I said, and I left her my name and we left. We got in Lauren's car and drove off. "That is so cute," she said happily. "What" I said, turning red. "The ring, that is so cute." She said, smiling. "Shut up." I said, my turning increasingly brighter. She giggled. "Just take me home," I said, slapping her playfully on the arm. Things with Matt and I got increasingly better; we spent every moment we could together. After school on the 11th I had Lauren drop me off at the store so I could pick up the ring and I was going to walk to my moms work afterwards and get a ride home. I went in the store and the same lady was working, after seeing me she says: "Ah, you are back to get the ring," she said with an odd look on her face. "Yeah." I said apprehensively. "How much do I owe you?" "It has already been paid for." She said, smiling. "What, by who?" "Just somebody that was very happy to see a young person not afraid of who they are." "Oh...wow, well tell them I said thanks." I said, a smile breaking across my face. "He's a very lucky young man." "Thanks, so am I." I said, leaving the store. I started walking to my mothers office. I got there and a couple guys from school were walking by. They walked closer and I saw Matt was with them. They saw me and headed started heading my direction "Hey queer, what's up?" One guy said "I'm not queer." I said. "Whatever," Yelled another guy, "I've seen you checking us out." "I don't want any trouble guys, I just want to go home." I said, with fear in my voice, then I saw him. Matt, standing there, with a look of fear in his eye and he mouths to me, "RUN!" So I took off, but I was no match for these guys, they cought up to me quickly and knock me onto the ground. "That's were you belong you stupid faggot," He yells, "At my feet." "Fuck you." I scream. "Oh you'd like that wouldn't you, you stupid faggot," Said the second guy, and then he kicked me, hard, in the ribs. I couldn't help but cry out. He didn't stop though, he kept kicking me and then his friend joined in. And through it all I could see Matt standing there, sure he looked scared but he didn't help, sure he looked on the verge of tears but he stood there and let them kick me. After a few minutes the boys stopped, one of them spat on me and they all walked off. I was hoping Matt would talk to me; tell me what he was thinking just standing there, not helping. He said nothing he just stood there. After awhile I got up and walked into my mother's office. I went into the bathroom to clean myself up a little. I knew if my mother saw me like that she would know something was up. I somehow managed to keep the tears in until I got home. I cried for a long time, late into the night. I didn't want to go to school the next day but I didn't want to explain to my mother why, so I went. I drudged through the halls and, somehow, got to all of my classes on time. I saw Matt in the hall he started to walk up to me but I ran off, I wasn't ready to talk to him yet. I went home again and cried, the next day was a repeat of the last. Then it was Valentine's Day. Matt came up to me again, but this time I didn't run off, I was ready to talk. He told me he wanted me to go to lunch with him. The bell rang and I walked to his car with him. We got into his car and started to drive off and I asked, "What the hell was that about, why did you just stand there?" "I'm sorry," he said, "I didn't know what to do, I wanted to help but...but I just couldn't move." "I understand that you are scared of people finding out, but you still could have helped some." I said, on the verge of tears. "I am so sorry, please, please can you find it in you heart to forgive me," He said pleadingly. "I want to but...I just don't know," I said, tears rolling down my cheek. "Please, I don't want to lose you." He said, tears rolling down his cheeks, also. "I need time Matt...It really hurt, to see you just standing there. How do I know if it happens again that you won't do the same thing?" I said. "Please, what do I have to do to prove it to you, I love you so much Ryan." He cried. "Do you want me to tell everyone, tell them all that how much I love you. "I would like that actually, to not have to hide it anymore," I said. "But I don't want to make you do something you aren't ready for. I will try it one more time, but you can't do it again. You have to promise that you will at least show people that we are friends." I said, crying again but this time for happy reasons. "I think I can manage that," he said, smiling. "Come here." And then he grabbed me into a great big hug. "I love you." "I love you, too." I said. "I almost forgot...Happy Valentine's Day." I said reaching into my pocket, getting the ring I had bought him. "Its beautiful," He said, "I have your present at my house, come over after school and I'll give it to you...Damn, it almost time for class, we better hurry back." He said this and then gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. We walked back to class; sadly I couldn't hold his hand like I wanted but the kiss would last me long enough. The rest of the day flew by because I knew that he loved me. After school I had to fight back the urge to skip to his car. When I got there I almost fainted. The jackasses that beat me up were there, just standing there like nothing happened. Matt finally realized I was there and he yelled out, "Hey, come over here." I was scared but I went anyway, I really didn't know what he was doing but... "What the hell's he doin' here?" asked one of the dumb asses. "He is my friend and we are hanging out." Said Matt. "Why the hell are you hanging out with him." Asked the same guy, he appeared to be the brains of the two. "Fuck off, I told you he is my friend." Matt yelled. "Careful dude, you might catch somethin' from the fag." He said, but Matt quickly had him laid out on the ground. "What the hell dude, that's to far...standing up for a fag...what the hell happened to you I mean..." "Fuck you" Matt yelled, "Come on Ryan we are leaving!" "Ok" I said, jumping in the car. "Watch your back Matt, only fags hang with fags." Yelled the guy, but Matt didn't care he just flipped him off and pulled out of the parking lot. "Wow, what was that about?" I asked. "I wanted to prove to you that I love you." He said nonchalantly "W-w-what." I stuttered, "You know the whole school is going to think you are gay by tomorrow." "I know." He said. "I love you so much." Saying it as I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek, and we drove the rest of the way to his house in silence. We got to his house and went inside. "That was the first part of your present," he said, "The rest is in there." Directing me towards his bedroom. "I'm not ready to have sex with you," I said, scared. "I love you, but I'm not ready to go there." "That's not what I was planning," he said with a mischievous smile. "Then what," I said, intrigued by his mysteriousness. "Just go look," he said still smiling his beautiful smile. I went in the room to find a wrapped box sitting on his bed. "Aw, why'd you have to wrap it?" I said kissing him. "Well open it," he said, much like a young boy on Christmas day. So I walked over to his bed and sat down. I slowly started to unwrap it, making Matt squirm. "Hurry up," he said lovingly, his impatience showing even more. "I want to know if you like it!" "Its from you, of course I'll like it!" I said, kissing him again. I slowly started to open the box and when I finally got it opened I found a piece of paper fold in half, and a small box. I opened the note first and I found a beautifully written message: Ryan, The time I have spent with you has been the best in my life. I know now that I am gay, and thanks to you that thought doesn't scare me. I love you so much. I hope I never have to be away from you. When I thought I lost you for my stupidity I nearly died. I hope I never have to go through something like that again. I love you with all my being. -Matt- P.S. Will you go with me to the Prom? I had tears in my eyes and I didn't know what to say so I just kissed him. When we broke our kiss I opened the little box, in it I found a silver charm bracelet with two beautiful charms, a heart and a star made of silver. "I love it," I said, kissing him again. He helped me put on the bracelet and he kissed me again, we kissed for a long time until suddenly he jumped out of bed. "Shit," he yelled. "What," I said. "My dad is going to be home in like ten minutes." He said, franticly. "Why is that a bad thing?" I asked. "It just is, you can't be here when gets home." He said. "I can call my mom and have her pick me up I guess." I said, a little hurt. "No, I'll take you home, but we have to hur..." Matt was cut off by the front door slamming. "Damnit he's home. Stay here and be quiet" He said running from the room." I was obviously quite curious but I stayed there, not like it mattered anyway because I could hear them yelling at each other from where I was. "What the hell are you thinkin' boy" yelled his dad, sounding kind of drunk. "You left your fucking clothes out this morning." "Those were your clothes dad." Matt said, trying to calm down his dad. "Don't you back talk me boy." Yelled his dad, and then there was the sound of something hitting the ground. "Don't hit me you sack of shit," Yelled Matt. "If you were any kind of man you'd stand up and hit me back," yelled his dad, "you worthless piece of shit." "I'm more of a man then you'll ever be," Matt yelled back. "Why you stupid faggot, I oughtta..." "Fuck you dad, I'm tired of your shit. You come home drunk and beat on me, then once you sober up you say you'll never do it again." Then Matt came running in to his room and he slammed the door shut. Once he sat down on the bed he started crying, so I wrapped my arms around him and held him. "I am so sorry you had to hear that." He sobbed. "It's ok, none of it was your fault," I said, reassuringly, "Just remember that I love you." Pulling him closer to me and kissing his head. "What the hell is going on in here," yelled his father bursting through the door, "I knew you were a fag." Suddenly Matt stood up and yelled, "Yeah I'm gay and this is my boyfriend, you got a problem with that." "You and your faggot boyfriend get the fuck out of my house." He yelled. "Fine, you piece of shit." Yelled Matt, tears streaming down his face, "come on Ryan, lets go." So we ran out of his house and got in his car. Matt started the car and sped off alarmingly fast. "Matt...uhh...could you slow down a little." I said, through his weaving in and out of traffic. "W-w-what...Oh my god I am so sorry, I didn't realize I was going so fast." He said, tears still rolling down his cheek, "I am just so scared...what am I going to do?" "Your mom lives in town doesn't she," I asked. "Yeah...I guess I can go talk to her..."he said, reluctantly. "But let me take you home first...I need to do this alone I think. "Ok," I said, "but if you need me, just call." So he drove me home with tears in his eyes, but I knew I couldn't help him do this. It was something he had to do on his own. I kissed him good-bye and then he was gone. I went to my room and sat on my bed, my phone sitting close to me. Somewhere around 3 in the morning I think I dozed off because the next thing I remembered was lying in my bed with sunlight shining through my bedroom window. I had to talk to Matt, so I picked up my phone and dialed his number. No answer. "Damn it!" I said, a little to loudly. I sat in my room for the next hour, trying his phone every once in a while. I paced my room some and tried his phone a couple more times, still not getting a response. Fearing the worse, I wrote a note to my parents saying I had to do a project for school and that I would be back later that afternoon, got in my moms car, and drove into town. I started to drive to his mom's house when I realized...I didn't know where she lived! I was going crazy. I decided to try his phone one more time and finally I got an answer. "Hello," said a groggy Matt. "Oh My God what happened? I have been calling you for the last three hours." I yelled into the phone. "I'm sorry, I didn't hear it. What's wrong." He said, waking up. "I have been worrying sick all night, what happened with your mom?" I said, calming down. "Come over here, I'll explain everything." He said. Then he gave me directions to his mother's house. I got there in about ten minutes and I ran to the door. "Hey," he said greeting me at the door in PJ pants and no shirt. "Hey," I said, "Now, what is going on?" "Well, I explained everything to my mom..." "And?" I interrupted. "Patience...She said...nothing I could do would make her stop loving me and that I can live with her." He said. I sighed with relief. "Oh and she said she wants to meet you. "S-s-she wants to meet me." I stammered. "Yes. She said she wants to meet the man that makes me so happy." He said. "Ok...I guess." I said. He just smiled and pulled me close to him. We laid on his couch for a while, then he said his mom would be home soon from the grocery store. We laid there for a little but longer then we heard the door open and a woman's voice saying, "Sweetie, I'm home." "What if she hates me?" I asked quickly. "How could she?" Matt said, kissing me. "Aw, how cute." Said his mother, effectively scaring the crap out of me. "Mom, this is Ryan, the man I love, Ryan this is my mother." He said proudly. "N-n-nice to meet you ma'am," I said, scared. "Oh sweetie, don't call me ma'am and don't be scared. I have wondered for a long time if my baby was gay and I decided that if he was or wasn't I didn't care. If he loves you then so do I." She said, sweetly. I sighed with relief and got up to shake her hand, but she quickly grabbed me into a hug. "How about some breakfast. You two stay in here and I'll make it." "Ok," we said in unison and we resumed our place on the couch. Our breakfast was wonderful. I stayed there most of the day, cuddled up with Matt and talking to his mother. After I while, though, Matt and I decided to go rent a movie. We left and drove to the store. We went in but we couldn't decide on a movie. He wanted a comedy but I wanted a horror movie. "C'mon, lets get something funny." Whined Matt cutely. "But if we get a horror movie we can cuddle up." I said, grinning. So we ended up getting Dawn of the Dead. We paid for the movie and walk towards his car, hand in hand. We were halfway across the parking lot when we see his father. "Shit." Matt said. We started walking towards his car faster but his father caught up with us, smelling very strongly of whiskey. "Matt, you are just confused. Come home and we can get you fixed." "There is nothing wrong with me dad. I am gay." "NO SON OF MINE WILL BE A QUEER!" he screamed, causing the people in the parking lot to stare. "You will come home with me and we will get you fixed." "I'm not going anywhere with you unless you can accept me and my boyfriend." "Fucking faggot." He screamed pulling something out of his coat... The next thing I knew was I was laying in a hospital bed, my arm in pain, with machines and cords all over. "HE'S AWAKE!" said a woman's voice, quite loudly. And then I was ambushed by a mass of people. Prominent in my view were Matt, and both our mothers. "I was so worried," said my mother. "I thought you were...you were...going to die." She said almost in tears. "I'm fine but what happened," I said groggily, "All I remember is Matt arguing with his dad." "You saved my life," said Matt in disbelief, "he tried to shoot me and you pushed me out of the way and he shot you in the arm." he couldn't continue due to the tears streaming from his eyes. "He tried to k-k-kill me...and-and-and you saved my life." the tears coming down even harder. "I love you," I said, and I pulled to me and gave him a hug the best I could. "Everybody out," said my mother, "Lets give these two some privacy." And everybody left Matt and I alone in the room. "I love you so much," Matt said, still crying. "I know you do, and I love you." I said, starting to cry. I pulled him even closer and he stroked my head lovingly. "Ok boys, break it up, its time for your shot." Said a very large nurse holding a very disturbingly large needle. "but...but.." "Yeah that's right...Butt, now roll over." She said, grinning. I'm sure all of my guests in the hallway heard a scream, but nobody mentioned it afterwards. The nurse left and let everybody come back in, but my mother soon told them that I need rest and they all needed to leave. Matt started to walk out but my mother stopped him. "I think you should stay here tonight." She said, "I love you Ryan, and I am so glad you are ok." She kissed me on the forehead and left the room. " "You two be good," said Matt's mother, also kissing us both on the forehead before leaving the room. Matt pushed a chair closer to my bed and he sat down, taking hold of my hand. "I still can't believe you saved my life," he said, tears welling up in his eyes. "I love you with all my heart and I would do it again in a heart beat." I said, wiping the tears from his eyes. He smiled at me and kissed me on the forehead. The nurse came in a little while later. "Oh god, are you here to give me another shot?" I asked, panicked. She laughed and said, "No, I am here to tell you that the doctor will be here in an hour or so to take a look at you." "Thanks," said Matt, still holding my hand. The nurse looked at us and turned to leave. At the door she turned, smiled then walked out. "That was odd." I said. "I think it was sweet." Matt said, kissing me again. We turned on the T.V. and sat there a while watching it. About an hour later the doctor came in. "Well you are both very lucky." "Both of us?" Interrupted Matt. "Yes both of you. Ryan, because the bullet didn't hit any major blood vessels and Matt because you have someone who loves you enough to push you out of the way of a bullet. Ryan, you are going to have to stay here for week or so. Now, there is also a police officer out side who would like to talk to you." "Ok," I said, a little scared. The doctor left and the police officer came in. "I am officer Davis." he said, "We caught the man who shot you, but we need to get your statement, but first, son could you leave" said meaning Matt. "No, he can't." I said, "He stays." "Ok, ok" the officer said, "Now what happened. So I told him what I remembered and Matt told him the rest. "The District Attorney will contact you about testifying." With that he left the room, leaving Matt and I alone again. "Matt, I think I need some sleep." I said, yawning. "Yes, go to bed. I love you" he said kissing me on the head and pulling my blanket to my neck. He turned off the light and TV and sat in his chair. "Good night, I love you." I said, sweetly. I woke up to somebody outside arguing with my mother. I really couldn't make out what they were saying but I could tell my mother was upset. Suddenly a woman, a very large camera burst into my room. "I told you no," yelled my mother, "He was just shot and he needs his rest." "We just want to ask him a few questions." Said the woman in a know-it-all tone of voice. "Get out, get out, get OUT!" screamed my mother. "It's ok mom..." I said. "Oh I'm sorry sweetie, did this woman wake you up." "Good he's awake, turn on the camera. This is Lindy Johnson reporting for channel 11news. We are here with Ryan Roberts who earlier today was the victim of a shooting." At this point Matt woke up. "What's going on" he said sleepily. "And who might you be?" asked the nosey reporter. "I'm Matt, who the hell are you?" "I am a reporter, now what is your relationship with young Ryan?" "I'm his boyfriend...what the hell do you want?" "Whoa...boyfriend. Interesting twist. Now Ryan, do you know the man that shot you?" "Yes, it was..." "It was my father. He was aiming for me and Ryan pushed me out of the way now are we done here," said Matt standing up. "Yes you are now GET OUT!" screamed my mother, pushing the two out the door. "But I don't have my story I'm not don..." "Yes you are, get out of here NOW!" screamed my mother. "Out, out, OUT!" "Thanks mom," "You go back to sleep mister," ordered my mother. "Ok, ok" I said, stifling a yawn. I laid back down and Matt turned the lights back off. "Matt, you do know that is going to be on the news." "I know," he said, yawning. "I don't care. I told you, I love you and I don't care who knows. Now go back to bed." "I love you. Good night." I remained in the hospital for a week. My arm was in a sling but other then that I was back to normal. As I was leaving the hospital there was a crowd of people gathered outside the hospital. From the crowd there was shouting and as I neared my mother's car somebody threw a tomato at us. The police officer that was escorting us pushed my mother, Matt, and I to the ground and pulled out his gun. There was screaming sirens and more shouting, only this time the shouting was caused by the police officers arresting the crowd. He assured us that it would be ok and we got in the officers car and left for my house. At my house we found another crowd, only this one was full of my friends. The officer pulled the car up to my house and let us out. "Thank you officer," I said. "No problem, I hope that horrible man rots in jail for a long time." The officer said. "So do we," exclaimed my mother. A group of my friends ran up to me, many of them in tears. "Oh my god Ryan, we heard what happened. Are you ok?" Screamed Lauren. "Yes I'm fine, but I really think I should go inside and rest." "Oh yeah, of course you should rest." She said. "Thank you, all of you." I said as I went inside. We went inside and sat down in the living room. I cuddled up next to Matt on the couch and our mothers went into the kitchen to talk. After a few minutes on the couch Matt turned the TV on to the news. The report about my shooting was just about to start. "A horrible event has rocked the community this past week." said the news reporter, "A teenage boy, Ryan Nathaniel Roberts, was shot in the parking lot of a local video store. He was shot pushing his boyfriend, Mathew Marcus Stevens, out of the way of a bullet. The boysfriends father, Lester James Stevens, was the shooter. Mr. Stevens lawyer would not let us interview his client but we were able to speak with Ryan." The clip came on the TV. "Are you ok with that being on TV?" I asked. "Of course," he said kissing me. "I don't care who knows, I love you." I couldn't say anything so I just smiled. He kissed me again, longer this time, and we were still kissing when my mother walked in. "Ahem!" we heard from the living way door way. I looked up and saw my mother standing there. "Mom, hi!" I said, blushing. "I just wanted to ask if you two were hungry." She said, smiling. "But I can see you're busy so I'll come back." She walked back into the kitchen and I could here them laughing. "Oh my god," I sighed. "Embarrassed to be seen with me?" Said Matt, feigning sadness. "Oh hush." I said pushing him down on the couch, "Now where were we." We continued making out on the couch for a few more minutes then we just laid there, cuddled and watched TV. Apparently I had fallen asleep because the next thing I new Matt was shaking me awake. "Hey babe, I can't feel my arm." He whispered. "What?" I said in a daze. "You fell asleep on my arm and now I can't feel it." He said cutely. "Oh, I'm sorry." I said yawning. "Why don't we go lay down on your bed," "Ok." I exhaustedly answered. So we walked back to my room. Rather, he walked and I stumbled with his help. We laid down on my bed and I quickly fell back asleep. Again Matt shook me awake. "What do you want now, I wanna sleep." "The doctor said you can go back to school today and it starts in half an our so we have to go!" "Aw, do I have to?" I whined "If you ever want to graduate then yes." He said kissing me. "Now get up and get in the shower we have to leave soon." "Fine." I said, sounding much like a ten-year-old boy. I walked into the kitchen to find my mother, Sarah (Matt's mother), and Matt carrying on a lively conversation. "Sleeping beauty awakes." Giggle Matt. "Ha-ha." I said, "Weren't you saying something about being late for school." "I guess we better go." As we drove to school I could tell he was nervous. "Are you sure you can do this?" I asked "Yes." We drove up to the school and parked his car. As we were walking up we saw a group of his friends, the same group that beat me up. "So Matt, you're a fag now?" yelled one of them. "Fuck you Will." He yelled back. "I thought that's what he's for." Yelled another dumb ass. "C'mon Ryan, we're going to be late for class." "We'll see you after school fags." They yelled walking off. We walked into the school building after them. "Meet me at my car at lunch," said Matt. "Bye." I said kissing his cheek. As I walked into the band room I could feel everyone's eyes on me. "Can I help you?" I asked sarcastically taking my seat and getting my instrument out. "Ah Ryan, glad to see you are back with us!" "Faggot," muttered somebody in the class. "Mr. Samuels, that is inappropriate and you will go to the office now." "Whatever," he muttered leaving the class. After his departing class started. Second hour French was much the same. "Ah, Bonjour Monsieur Roberts! Ca va?" "Bonjour Madame. Ca va bien, merci. Et vous?" I replied, ignoring the stares of my classmates. "Ca va bein, merci! Bonjour class. Avez-vous bon weekend?" she said, trying to begin class. Thankfully, there were no episodes in that class and it went on normally. Finally it was over and it was lunchtime. I ran to Matt's car. "Hey babe, slow down you just got out of the hospital you don't need to be running around." He said. "I was just excited, I haven't seen you in like 3 hours!" He giggled and kissed me on the cheek. We got in his car and drove off. We drove around for a while and decided on a place to eat, we got our food and drove back to the school to eat. "Are you sure you want to eat in the cafeteria?" I asked? "Very sure." he said kissing me. As we walked into the cafeteria it was the same as class, everyone's eyes on us. Matt just grabbed my hand and we walked on. We found an empty table and sat down. Shortly after my friend walked up. "What, you think since you're all gay and everything you can stop sitting with us?" she asked. She kept her straight face as long as she could. Lauren is a very outspoken girl, so when people started staring at her she just ignored them and sat down. "Boy, you can't get rid of me that easily!" "I love you Lauren." I said giggling. We started eating our lunch when a couple more of my friends walked up. "Hey guys," I said nervously. "Hey!" said Stephen, sitting down with a couple of my other friends. "What, did you expect your little love show on the news to make us hate you? Sure we would have liked to been told by you but we don't care if you're gay!" "Of course not," I said averting my eyes. After that lunch returned to normal. We laughed and talked, we ignored the stares from our fellow diners. "Hey babe, I need to get my stuff for class will you walk with me?" Matt asked me, a look of love in his eye. "Of course. See you guys later." "You guys are so cute." Giggled Lauren and Sarah together as we walked off. As we were walking down the hall Matt grabbed my hand, I looked at him and kissed him on the cheek. We got to his locker and he grabbed his stuff, his class was right across the hall of mine so we walked together. "Are you coming over after school?" he asked. "Yeah, what are we going to do?" I answered. "I don't know we'll think of something. I have to go. I love you, meet me at my locker after school." He said, kissing me on the cheek, that mischievous twinkle in his eye. My last classes of the day passed without incident. But as I was walking to Matt's locker somebody bumped into me and knocked my books from my arms and I could hear somebody mumble faggot but in the noisy din of the hallway I could not tell who it was. I walked to the locker and waited there for Matt. I waited and waited and waited, after half an hour or so I started getting anxious. After another ten minutes I decided to leave him a note. Hey, Don't know what happened but I went home, call me later... Then I walked to the band room and grabbed my bassoon. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed my mother. "Hey, what's up sweetie?" my mother said answering the phone. "Nothing, Matt and I were going to hang out but he never showed up. Do you think you can come pick me up?" I responded, my disappointment evident in my voice. "Yeah, I'll be there in a few minutes. Love you!" She answered, trying not to sound too curious. "Bye" I said, hanging up the phone. She pulled up a few minutes later. "Hey sweetie!" she said in that concerned mother tone "Hey." I said, a little sad. "So why didn't Matt sho..."she was interrupted by my cell phone ringing. "Sorry, just a second." I said, "Hello? Oh hey, what happened earlier? Oh, ok. Yeah I'll have my mom take me over there. See you in a few. Hey mom, can you take me over to Matt's house?" "Of course," she said. "Hey baby!" Matt said, coming out to the car. " Hey Ms. Roberts, I'll bring him home later." He opened my door and grabbed my hand. "Close your eyes, I have a surprise." H guided me to his house and we went inside. "What 's the surprise?" I asked excitedly. "Hold on, we're almost there!" he said, almost as excited as me. He led me threw the entry was of his house to the living room and then into the kitchen. "Ok, open your eyes!" On his dining room table was a bouquet of roses, a box of chocolates, and a little jewelry box. "What's all of this?" I asked in a daze. "I just wanted to show you how much I love you." He said, picking up the jewelry box. "I love you with all my heart. This is a promise ring, it symbolizes how much I love you and that we are promised to each other. I hope to be able to spend the rest of my life with you!" I stood there, speechless. He put the ring on my finger and took me in his arms. "I love you Ryan!" "I love you, too!" I said, tears running down my cheek. We stood there for a little while just holding each other. "That's why I left you at the school. I had to get everything and make sure it was perfect." He said kissing me. "Babe, I really can't stay that long. I have a ton of homework to finish. I love you so much." I said kissing him back. "Ok, I'll take you home in a little bit." We made out for 20 minutes or so then I told him I really did have to go home if I ever wanted to go to bed tonight. He drove me home and walked me to the door. " I love you Ryan Roberts. I love you with all my heart!" he said kissing me again. "I love you, too!" I said opening the door, kissing him and walking inside. Inside I went to find my mother. "Mom, he is so wonderful. Look what he gave me!" I said showing her the promise ring and the flowers. "I wish I had a man that treated me that nice." She said, laughing and kissing me on the cheek. I went to my room and finished all the homework I could before the urge to sleep became too overwhelming. "Where am I?" I thought. My surroundings weren't familiar. I was in a house, it appeared to be very old and out of use. There were cobwebs all over and it seemed that the house was decaying before my very eyes! "Creeeeeeeeeeeek!" Came an ominous sound from the second story of the aged house. "This place is so strange," I thought, "I really don't like it." "Ahhhh!" Came a scream, again from the upper story. I ran up the stairs and found myself in a long hallway lined with doors. Then the scream came again. "Hello!" I screamed. "Ryan! Ryan, help meeee..." "Oh my god, Matt! Where are you?" I screamed "Heeeeelp!" I began running down the hall kicking open doors. It seemed like I was getting nowhere. It felt as if I would never reach the end of the hall, like I would never reach him... Finally I found Matt lying there, in a pool of his own blood, dying. I ran to him. "Oh my god, oh my god, Matt are you ok." I cried holding his dying body in my arms. "Matt, you can't die. I need you!" "Ry...ry...ryan..." he whispered. "Matt, what happened." I cried. "Ryan...behind...you..."he forced out. Out of the corner of my eye I could barely make out a dark figure coming at me. I saw it all as if it was in slow motion. He raised a gun level with my head and... I awoke with a start I was covered in sweat and panting like someone who had just run a ten-mile marathon. "It was a dream. Only a dream." Though I knew it was only a dream I couldn't stop the tears from coming. I had to talk to him, so I picked up my phone and dialed his number. "Ryan?" Matt answered sleepily. "Matt, oh my god." I cried into the phone. "Ryan, what happened? What's wrong?" he said, suddenly much more awake. "Matt. I...uh..." "Tell me! What happened?" "I had a horrible dream. I dreamt that you were dying and-and-and-and now I feel really dumb." "Is that all." He laughed. "It's not funny!" "I'm sorry. I thought somebody tried to kill you or something." "I'm so sorry, I woke you up. I'll let you go back to bed." "Are you sure you are ok?" He asked sweetly. "Yeah, I am fine. I will try to go back to sleep." "Alright, I love you!" "I love you, too. Good night." I didn't sleep anymore that night, the dream had shaken me to much so I just turned on the TV and watched the stupid shows that come on late at night. I was almost useless at school the next day. It took everything I had not to fall asleep in my first two classes. At lunch Matt found me and we went out to his car. "Baby, what's wrong? You look exhausted." He said caringly, kissing me on my cheek. "I just didn't sleep that much after that dream." I said, trying not to cry anymore. "It scared me so much, I thought I was going to lose you." He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in close. "Ryan, nothing will ever take me away from you! I love you and I always will! You are my soul mate and I am going to spend the rest of my life with you." He wiped away my tears and kissed me again. "I love you, too, Matt." I said, standing there in his arms. "Let's go somewhere." So we got in his car and he drove off, I wasn't really hungry but I didn't feel like standing in the parking lot anymore. We pulled up in his driveway. "Babe, how about we skip the rest of the day and stay here?" He asked, kissing my hand. "Alright," I said, pulling him in and kissing him. We got out and he unlocked his house. He led me back to his room and he pulled me in close and whispered into my ear. "Ryan, I want to make love to you." "I want that, too but...I just don't know if I am ready." "If you aren't ready then I won't push it." And with that he kissed me and opened his door. For a while we just laid there, on his bed, his arms wrapped around me. I turned around and started kissing him. I started to take off his shirt and he stopped me. "Baby, are you sure this is what you want?" "Yes!" I said, and I continued taking off his shirt. He reached over onto his bedside table and pulled out a box of condoms and a bottle of lotion. We made love and then we laid in each others arms for the rest of the afternoon. Contact me at LoverBoi_007@musician.org with comments