Losing My Virginity and Then My Heart

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"Losing My Virginity And Then My Heart." Part Four.

By Danny D and Jordan R

This is where I meet Jordan. It felt weird trying to express how he felt about meeting and being with me. So, I wrote the story leaving a lot of that out and then Jordan and I sat down and went over it, adding his words, expressing his feelings about how he felt with regard to me. He was all over this part. So, I added his name as co-author to the story.

Bastian came to my room after Hunter moved out. "What happened?" he asked.

"Did he say why he was moving out?" I asked.

"Yeah, he said he wanted to live with his frat brothers, but it all seemed really weird. Did something happen? Is someone moving in with you? Can I?"

I felt scared. "He told me the same thing."

"Then why are you so upset? Can I move in?"

"I already went to the housing off and asked for a single room. I think that will be better."

"Something is going on. You just don't want to tell me. But why?" He stared at me. "Jordan, if something happened, I'm your friend. You're my best friend. You can tell me."

I could feel the tension in my face, the tension I was sure he was seeing. "You can't tell anyone, okay?"

"Okay, what happened?"

"He asked me if I was gay." I glanced at Bastian and sighed.

"So you're attracted to boys. So what? Did you tell him you were attracted to him? Is that what happened?"

"No. I told him I wasn't."

"Oh so, he got angry that you weren't and moved out."

"No. He said he thought I was attracted to him and that made him sick and he had to move out. I told him that I wasn't and I'm not, but he still said he wanted to move out."

"Asshole. God, Americans are so weird about this stuff."

"Are you upset that I didn't tell you?"

"Yes, because you didn't because you thought I'd be upset like Hunter. You should know me better than that. I don't care."

"Would you still have done stuff if you knew?"

"Yes. One of the boys in Amsterdam, he and I had sex for almost a month and he was only attracted to boys. We stopped because he wanted me as a boyfriend. He wanted me to love him. I did love him, but not like that, not like a girl. I felt bad, really bad, like I was bad because I really was having fun, I mean I did love him, but his feeling were being hurt. I felt bad."

I nodded and sighed.

I was sitting on my bed. He was sitting at my desk. He got up and sat beside me. "Jordan, you're my best friend here. I like having sex with you, a lot. But I don't want to make you feel bad."

I nodded.

"No one else knows your gay?"

"No. I mean a coach where I went to high school. But my parents don't know Ð only you and now Hunter."

"If you let people know, there are other gay guys here. They'd be all over you."

"Yeah, right."

"Jordan. I'm not gay and I'm attracted to you. I'm not attracted to guys pretty much, but I was attracted to you the first time we met, but then when I got to know you I was even more attracted to you. I even thought I'd let you fuck me and I never think that and you've got a big cock and I still thought I would let you." He smiled at me. "We couldn't do it here though, because I think I'd be moaning a lot."

I smiled.

He said, "I want us to be best friends."

"Me, too. You are my best friend."

"I'm so sorry you are upset. I think maybe Hunter was attracted to you and when he found out you were gay he got scared because he was attracted to a gay guy and Americans think that makes them gay too."

I went home for spring break. I was pretty depressed. I saw Coach Wilson and Gary. We talked and I started feeling better. They told me that it was good that I told Bastian and told me to take what he said seriously. "He sounds like a very honest person. He likes you, respects you, is attracted to you, but has told you that he's not boyfriend material. If you can have sex with him and have fun, then go for it. But be careful not to let your feelings cross over into falling in love with him."

"I know."

"Take it slow," Gary said, "and I would recommend you not kiss him and probably not fuck him or let him fuck you."

"Why?"

"For me, jerking off and sucking cock were just something to do. But the kissing and the fucking, well, for me that just moved it into a different place, especially the kissing and getting fucked."

It was hard being at home this time. My father asked why I had moved into a single. I told him that I could better study. He bought that as a good reason. My mother seemed different. I wasn't sure how, but she seemed preoccupied, sad, and oddly less cold toward me.

When I went back to Stanford, I moved to a single room that was on the floor above the floor I was on. It really didn't feel like much of a move. I still saw all the guys that I was friends with and ate with them. Bastian and I had another class together and now that I had my own room he was always stopping by and asking if he could study with me. I felt like I was actually seeing more of him and we did mess around once in a while.

The first time we messed around was about a week after classes started. I was at my desk and he was lying on my bed reading. I said, "So, I'm feeling really horny and,"

"Do you want me to leave or can I jerk off with you?"

I smiled. "You don't have to leave."

He jumped up and began undressing. "It's cool now that you have your own room."

"Can I say something?"

"Of course," he said.

"So, I really want us to be friends forever. I don't want to be like that boy." He stared at me and nodded. I said, "I think if we just jerk off and give each other head once in while, it should be fine."

"That's good. Do you want me to wait for you to say something?"

"You mean to play?" He nodded. I said, "No, you can say stuff. If I'm feeling weird I'll say something."

He was naked. "Come on, get naked." I smiled and began undressing. He said, "Can I say this?"

"What?"

"If I ever get a girlfriend, well then I will still jerk off with you anytime you want, but probably we won't give each other head. And when you have a boyfriend we can still jerk off together and won't give each other head. You know what I mean?"

I smiled. "That's cool." I pulled off the last of my clothing. We sat on the bed. "I'm not sure about having a boyfriend."

"I can help you, if you want. I can go to those meeting with you. They're for bi people to. I guess that's me. I'll keep you company."

"I'll let you know," I said.

We sat beside each other and stroked. He put his hand on my cock. I moved mine to his. We stroked and then I moved down on his cock. He moaned loudly. I licked and sucked. I thought that sucking cock was going to be my very favorite thing to do. And sucking Bastian's cock was a real turn on but I wondered what fucking would be like. He reached around and stroked my cock. My cock was rock hard. I loved the feel of his cock in my mouth, the taste, the musky smell and hearing him moan. I took him deep into my throat, pressing my nose into his pubes.

He moved me off his cock. "You are really good at that. You're getting me close to fast and you don't even use your hand."

I smiled and sat up. He went down on me. I relaxed and gave myself to him. I watched as he hungrily bobbed up and down on my cock. The feeling was incredible and watching him was exciting. I watched and stroked his head.

We went back and forth, taking turns, moving around on the bed, until neither of us could stand not coming any longer. "Can I jerk you off," he asked. "I just love seeing guys come."

"Please," I said. I sat back and watched him play with my cock. He stroked, he played with my balls, he ran his finger over the head of my cock, wiping up the pre-cum and using it to stroke my cock. "I'm close," I said.

He moved and straddled my legs, facing me. He stroked my cock holding it against his. "My friend used to love doing this."

"I'm going to come," I moaned.

He pressed my cock against his as I began shooting. He moved and pressed my cock up against his balls. I kept coming. I moaned gripping the sheets. He kept rubbing my cock head over his balls and trimmed pubs.

"Fuck," I said, squirming. "That's incredible."

His junk was wet with my cum.

He moved and sat beside me. I smiled at him and straddled his legs. He smiled. I began stroking his cock. The smell of cum filled the air. I moved again and took him into my mouth. "Oh fuck," he moaned. "You're going to get me close." I kept sucking. The taste of my cum and the smell had me hard again. I felt his cock head get rock hard. "I'm close," he groaned.

I sat up, straddled his legs and moved his cock head over my balls and trimmed pubes. He moaned and thrust against me. As he came I moved his cock head over my balls and cock. He squirmed, moaned and thrust.

We lay beside each other. He looked at me and smiled and then laughed. I laughed too. "That was fun," he said. I nodded. "If we do stuff like that, we're okay?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"We are a mess, but a good mess."

We wiped each other clean, using my boxers and then went back to studying without getting dressed. Before he left we were at each other again.

He asked me if I wanted to be the fourth man in a two-bedroom apartment. He and Sam had found an apartment. Sam had a friend named David who he was going to room with. Bastian said that David was gay. I talked to my father who was paying for my housing. He asked that I live in the dorms one more year before going out on the `economy'. I was undecided about moving off campus, so it didn't take much for him to convince me. I told Bastian and told him of my concern that we might not see each other. "That's just not going to happen," he said. When we signed up for classes for the fall quarter we again took a class together.

He had had two dates with two different girls. I think both he and I were worried that him having a date would bother me. It didn't. In both cases he decided he wasn't interested in a second date. I wondered if they complained about his cock, but I didn't ask.

We spent a lot of time together that spring quarter. We studied for the class we were taking together. He studied in my room three or four times a week and then we hung out on weekends. We didn't play all that often and I became aware that we only played around when I suggested it. I asked why that was. He said, "I am worrying that I might seduce you into really liking me like a boyfriend. I don't want to hurt you and fuck things up."

"I don't feel like that and I'll tell you if I do."

He told me that we were friends with benefits. I was enjoying the benefits and so was he.

After that he was not shy about starting things. As a matter of fact he was a lot more aggressive than I had been. I'd always nervously ask if he was horny and wanted to jerk off. He never asked. We'd be studying or talking and he'd press his hand into my junk until I got hard. He'd smile and pull out his erection. I stopped asking and did the same. Bastian was teaching me to be much more relaxed about being naked with a guy, about being sexually assertive and about sex itself. The way the coach helped me feel better about my physical abilities and about myself, Bastian was helping feel better about sex and my sexuality. I think because of him I changed from thinking of myself as a gay person to a person who is gay.

I had been going to the yoga club and swimming. The time I swam changed according to the classes I had each quarter. That spring quarter I was swimming on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Toward the end of the quarter, I had missed my several Thursday swims and decided to swim on Friday. The pool was crowded and we were swimming three to a lane, which meant that I felt the pressure to keep up with the fastest moving guy. It was a good workout.

I got out of the pool and started heading to the showers. The guy that I was fighting to keep up with followed me. We went into the shower. He took the shower beside me. "You moved onto my floor this quarter?" he said.

I looked at him and did recognize him from the dorm. "Yes, I did."

He and I still had our swimsuits on. Standing under the shower, he said, "I'm Danny."

"Jordan," I said.

He put out his hand. We shook hands. "Did you swim in high school," he asked.

"No," I said smiling. "But you must have. You looked like you were just cruising along and I was trying to keep up and felt like I was going to die."

He smiled. "Yeah, I swam. Did you do any sports?"

"Gymnastics."

"Ah," he said, taking off his suit. "That explains it."

My mind was racing. I glanced at his naked body, his junk. I knew I had stop if I was going to take my suit off. I pulled it down and stepped out of it. I watched as he soaped up his suit to wash the chlorine out of it. I did the same.

"Do you swim often," he asked.

"Usually twice a week and I do yoga too three days a week. What about you?"

"I swim three days a week. And I run. Yoga. Really? That's cool."

"Yeah, I had a coach in high school that got me into it."

He turned off his shower. "I've got to get to class. Jordan, it's good to finally talk to you. Don't be such a stranger on the floor."

"Yeah, sure. Maybe we'll run into each other here too."

I watched him leave the shower. Oh my God, I thought. He's beautiful and what a body and I bet he's hung. I stood under the shower. I decided that I had to stop thinking about him until I got clothes on. I grabbed my towel and headed into the locker room. I dried off and started getting dressed. I saw him leave the locker room. Oh my God, he looks great in clothes too. He was wearing a dark blue pair of jeans that fit perfectly, red Converse and a Cardinal red Stanford light-weight hoodie.

I dressed thinking about his face Ð big blue eyes, dark brown hair, straight white teeth, strong straight nose and high cheekbones. His body was smooth, his pubes trimmed, his cock was cut and his scrotum hung loosely. And his butt, oh my God, his butt, smooth and round.

Danny Ð Danny what?

I did see Danny in the commons a couple of times. We smiled at each other. Each time I went swimming, and I went a couple of times on Fridays, I looked for him but never found him.

Finals time again. Bastian and I were hornier during stressful times and finals were definitely stressful. We decided that we'd study for two hours without a break and then I'd blow him. Then two more hours and then he'd blow me. We'd study for eight hours straight, each getting head twice. It was perfect.

I felt really sad leaving for summer break. I imagined that most people looked forward to being away, but I had no social life at home. Again, I worked at my father's dealership in the service department. It was where I wanted to work. The guys were fun, joked around, teased and taught me about cars. Mostly, I ran errands, cleaned up, washed cars and hung around.

My mother seemed very different. I still wasn't sure how, except she seemed more available to me, interested in what I was doing, and not as easily angered. As a matter of fact, she hardly ever got angry at me at all. And I noticed that she was becoming less patient with Amy.

I talked to Bastian about once a week. We text messaged a lot. He was in The Netherlands and dating a girl he met and seemed to really like her. "She doesn't give good head," he said. "I miss that."

"I guess she hasn't had as much practice as I have."

He laughed. "She doesn't enjoy it as much as you do either."

I laughed.

I counted the days until spring quarter. Finally, it arrived. I asked to keep my single room in the dorms. Since I was returning I was pretty much guaranteed the room, and I got it. Most of the guys on the floor were freshman, but a few were sophomores. Dennis, Connor and I quickly became friends.

It was great to see Bastian. He and I had a psychology class. After the first class he came to my room. He and the girl he was dating over the summer had agreed that they had fun but would move on. "It's kind of cool that you can date and not have a bad breakup."

"Yeah. It's stupid to have a fight or to say I won't date anyone and I'll see you next summer. Besides, I might stay here next summer."

"That's cool."

"Are we cool," he said.

"What? Of course. Why wouldn't we be?"

He smiled and put his hand on my junk. "I don't know. Maybe you don't want the benefits part anymore." My cock responded to his touch. He smiled. "Your cock still likes me."

"I was going to jerk off this morning, but I knew I'd see you," I said and chuckled.

We were naked and giving each other head minutes later.

Although I had done great the year before, my anxieties were high. I had had chemistry in high school, but this year I was taking organic chemistry and there were all kinds of stories about how hard it was. Plus, this was a required class for pre-med students and it was said to be one of the make or break for them.

I went to class. As with inorganic chemistry, it was taught in a large lecture hall. The tension in the room was high. A lot of people were saying hello to their friends who they hadn't seen since June. I sat alone, thumbing through my textbook. It was almost 1200 pages long. Fuck, I thought. That's 400 pages a quarter and a lab book on top of that. With midterms and final week, that's about fifty pages a week, ten pages a day. Fuck, ten pages of organic chem. a day. Get over it. This is your major. I turned the pages. Be positive. Yea, ten pages of organic chem. a day.

I closed the book.

"Hey," I heard someone say. I didn't look up, sure they weren't talking to me. "Jordan, right?"

I was sitting on the aisle in the lecture hall. I looked to my left and up. Oh my God. "Hey," I said. "Danny."

He was walking down the aisle with a female friend. "Good to see you," he said.

"Yeah, good to see you."

He smiled and kept walking. He's either a chem. or biology major or he's pre-med. I felt my face warm. Could it be possible that he looked better than the last time I saw him. He was tanned. Well, at least now I'll have someone to stare at during boring lectures. Stare at and fantasize about.

Bastian convinced me to go to the LGBT meetings. He went to the first with me. I had to admit that it was a good idea, but it was also one of the hardest things I did. I didn't know anyone there. It seemed very political, especially the "L's". I did get to know one guy who seemed nice. We went for coffee and soon he started on me about not being out and that the only way to change people's attitudes toward gay people was for all gay men to come out. "And how the hell can you have a real boyfriend if you're not out? I mean it's easy to have sex and a lot of sex but it's impossible to have a boyfriend if you're not out."

"I hadn't thought about that," I said.

"If you don't love yourself for being gay how can you love another gay man?"

I agreed with him completely, but I don't think at that time I was ready. But what he said stayed with me.

A few weeks later, another guy asked me out. I was flattered, nervous and excited. He was also not out to his parents and friends. But then our date turned weird. Well, maybe not weird, but we went to a movie in town and then he asked if we could go to my room. I was okay with that. I wasn't a prude or at least a lot less of a prude after getting to know Bastian. But on the way he said, "I can tell you're hung."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, when you sit. You're pants are tight around your junk and you've got a solid bulge. Since the first day I saw you at the meeting, I've been trying to figure a way to get my hands on that."

I felt really weird Ð disappointed, sad. I understand being hot for someone. I guess I could have been flattered that he wanted to get in my pants, but I felt let down. We went to my room. He grabbed my junk just like Bastian had. I put my hand on his. He had my dick out before I could think about it. I got hard but I wasn't really into it. We undressed and he went down on me. I sat and watched him sucking my cock, but had no interest in sucking his. I stroked his cock while he kept sucking mine.

I was surprised when he came in my hand. He sat up and said, "Can I see you come?"

I jerked myself off. He watched me come and then dressed and left.

I decided I was going to take a break from the LGBT meets.

During that time Bastian was introduced to a girl named Vicki. From the start I could tell that this was different. He liked her a lot and he thought she liked him. One day, while heading to the class we both had, we ran into her. "This is my best friend, Jordan," he said.

I thought she was very pretty and nice. She walked us to our class. "She likes you," I said.

"You can tell?"

"It's the way she looks at you. I like her."

"I've told her about you. She's been wanting to meet you."

Sitting in class I realized that I would have to share Bastian with Vicki, but it felt okay. As I began to realize that I wanted a boyfriend, I wanted Bastian to have a girlfriend.

On the way back from class I talked to Bastian about coming out and having a boyfriend. He agreed that it's very hard to have one and not be out. "I know it's hard to tell people," he said. "But you've got me. I'll support you."

So, I also decided that I was going to start to come out to guys on the floor, but slowly and only when it seemed like it fit the conversation. Bastian told me that if I did it that way, most people would be fine with it and those who weren't Ð well too bad for them. He also said that if I didn't swear them to secrecy, which he said I shouldn't, everyone would know in a matter of days.

And that's what I did. I was at lunch with Connor and he said that his girlfriend knew a girl that was interested in me. I held my breath and said, "Ah, well, that's cool, but I'm gay."

He looked at me for a moment and said, "Oh, okay, I didn't know. Does anyone know?"

"A few people."

"Is it like a secret. I mean I won't say anything."

"No, not a secret, I guess. But I don't go around telling everyone and my family doesn't know."

"Cool," he said.

Nervously, I asked, "Are you cool with it. I mean I'd think it would be, but I've told people before and sometimes they're not."

"It is perfectly cool with me. I know a guy you might want to go out with you."

I smiled. "I think I might just not date for a little while. But that's really cool."

"Jordan. I know that it's fucked up having to tell people. I mean I don't tell people I'm straight."

"Thanks for that. Really."

"We're good friends, right?"

"Yes. I'm glad I told you. And like you said, it's fucked up to have to tell people."

After that I wondered about who knew. Actually, it bothered me. But then after a while I stopped thinking about it and then I didn't really care. I think I was most worried about showering in the dorms. Would guys not shower when I was in there? Would they cover up when I walked in?

None of that happened. As a matter of fact, one night I was showering and Connor came into the bathroom and stepped into the shower beside me even though there were others available. At first I felt awkward, very awkward. But he just smiled, turned on the shower and started chatting away. Everyone else just went along like always.

Things were getting hot and heavy between Bastian and Vicki. He and I had stopped giving each other head and I knew that soon we'd make it official. And I was okay with that. One day after class he told me that he and Vicki had a long talk. He told her that he thought of himself as being mostly into girls but had had oral sex with three guys. They talked about sexual attractions and behavior. She told him that she had been attracted to a couple of girls and would have had sex with them, but it never happened. Then he told her that I was one of the guys. She said that she thought that was the case. She said, "If I were you, I'd have sex with him too."

I said, "So we really shouldn't do anything anymore."

"Well, I'd feel weird if she had oral sex with a guy, so I don't think I should do that either. But I think, if you want, we can still jerk off. I mean if she masturbated with a girl I wouldn't care."

"Maybe you should ask her," I said.

Bastian came by several times a week to study and once in a while I'd go to his apartment and hang out with him and his roommates. We also went to Stanford football games together. He did talk to her about jerking off. She said it was okay. I told him that it was fine with me if we didn't. I decided I wouldn't suggest it but would be fine if he did. Life was good.

Bastian told me that his roommate David was gay, but said I shouldn't get interested in him. "Why," I asked.

"He's a real jerk. He goes out with guys and then treats then like shit. He gets them to like him and then he sabotages the relationship and then rejects them. He does that thing Ð I want you if you don't want me and I don't want you if you want me. Don't get sucked in by him. He loves to flirt."

"Okay."

"He went out with some guy last year who he didn't get to reject. The guy broke it off with him when he found out David was fucking around after he promised to be exclusive. Now David's obsessed with this guy and wants to get him back. Probably so he can reject him."

"Wow, that sounds fucked up."

I thought David was good looking and he certainly was a flirt. He was funny and gave looks like he wanted to lick your body. But I was pretty sure that if Bastian hadn't told me anything, I still wouldn't have found him interesting. He seemed full of himself and angry, sarcastic and demeaning. So, I was really surprised when at the end of the winter quarter, Bastian said, "David is putting this orgy together."

"What?"

"A gay orgy."

"People put together gay orgies?"

"How do you think they happen? Anyway, remember that guy I told you about who David was dating and trying to get back together with. Well, he had told David that his fantasy was to have a gay orgy with about six guys."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"They need a couple more guys. David thinks he knows of another guy. He asked me to join them."

"Have you had sex with David?"

"No, and I wouldn't. You're my only friend with benefits. Anyway, he knows you're gay and he thought if I asked you, you might say yes. They're doing it on Friday after finals. I'll be gone anyway. This will go most of Friday night I guess."

"But you said to stay away from David."

"Yeah, sure, but there will be four other guys there. One of them is the guy that broke up with him. I think David's doing this to try to get back with him."

I shook my head. "I don't know. I won't know anyone there. It will be weird."

"Weird but it could be fun." I chuckled. He said, "There are rules. The guy who he's doing it for, his name is Danny, he says there has to be rules."

"Wait, Danny?" I said feeling lightheaded. My face warmed. "Do you know Danny?"

"I've met him a couple of times. They have friends that are friends."

"What does he look like?"

"Ah, well, tall, looks like he has a great body, blue eyes I think. Dark brown hair."

"He swims?"

"You know him?"

"He lived on the same floor as me when I moved into the single last year."

"Yeah, that's him. You know him?"

"He's gay?"

"Yes. You want to hear about this now?" I nodded. He said, "Okay, the rules are that you have to use condoms if you fuck. No exchange of bodily fluids and no one has to do anything that they don't feel comfortable with. I think it's going to be just six guys messing around. Nothing real hard core."

"Six guys messing around is pretty hard core, don't you think?"

"Not really. I've done the orgy thing in Amsterdam with guys and girls and everyone having sex, man on man and woman on woman and man on woman. That's more hard core than just six guys."

My heart was pounding.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah. I've talked to him at the pool and he's in my chem. class. He's so hot, don't you think?"

"Yeah, he is. He's really nice too, really nice and he seems kind and not like he bullshits people. I could never figure out why he went out with David. I guess the reason he stays friends with David is that he's not a jerk or something. But he told Sam that there is no way he'd ever date David again."

"I guess they'll have sex at the orgy," I said

"I don't know. One of Danny's rules is that no one has to do anything they don't want to do. Are you thinking about going?"

"I'd love to with Danny there, but it kind of scares me."

"Jordan, it will be like when you and I mess around. Just having fun. And if you want to just sit there and jerk off and watch, I guess you can do that."

He smiled.

"What?" I said.

"With Danny there, I bet you're not going to just sit around and jerk off."

"Maybe he won't want to have sex with me?"

"Well, you'll never know unless you go. Besides, I know he's not going to he chasing David, so that only leaves four of you. If he doesn't want to play with you, then he's down to three."

"I guess."

"Look, if he wasn't looking to play, he wouldn't be going."

I sat silently.

He said, "I'm going to tell David you're going."

I sighed. "I wish I didn't know about this until after finals. Now it's all I'm going to be able to think about."

"Cool. I'm telling David." He smiled. "He's in your chem. class?" I nodded. "So you have two more lectures and the final. I wonder if David will tell him that you're going to be there." He laughed. "If he comes up and says something to you, you have to act cool. Don't act all nervous." He laughed again. "You're going to pull wood if he says anything."

"I'll pull wood just seeing him. Fuck, my stomach is like I'm car sick."

He laughed.

Bastian called David. "Jordan said he'd be here for the orgy." I sat there listening to him tell David and felt excited but still very nervous.

I went to my chem. lecture and looked for Danny. I spotted him sitting with the same girl he always sat with. He didn't see me. I saw him again at the last lecture, this time we made eye contact and he smiled. I guess it was silly for a nineteen year old guy to get all excited when a guy smiles at him, but my face tingled and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I wondered if he knew.

Bastian and I studied for finals together. I asked him not to tease me about the orgy because it was really making me nervous. He didn't mention it again.

I went to the lecture hall for my chem final early. It was scheduled in a large auditorium. I found a seat on the aisle. We were not to bring anything put pencils and pens to the final. Our packs had to be put in the front of the auditorium where they would be watched by the TAs. And we were not to have a phone with us. If we were caught with a phone, we'd be asked to leave.

The TAs were there at the front. I walked down, turned off my phone and put it in my pack and left my pack with them. I found a seat on the aisle. Other people began showing up. They did the same as I did. I saw Danny come in and go to the front. Then he walked up the aisle toward me. We made eye contact. He smiled. He came up to me and said, "Can I sit there?"

I moved and made room for him to pass. He sat leaving an empty seat. He leaned over and said, "Good luck."

"Yeah, you too."

He smiled and said, "I'm really looking forward to seeing you Friday." I guess I looked surprised. "I saw Bastian at the library. He told me that you were invited." He smiled big.

My heart skipped ten beats. "I'm excited." Then I blushed.

He smiled and said, "I'm looking forward to seeing just how excited." I laughed. "Sorry," he said. "I shouldn't have said that. But I was really happy when Bastian told me you'd be there. What's your major?"

"Chem. What's yours?"

"Chem. Wow, one of the smart people. I'm premed, like most of the people here. I wish I knew you were a chem. major, I would have asked you to be a study partner."

Oh my God, he's so hot, I thought. "Well, there's next quarter. I mean I don't know how much help I can be, but if you really want a study partner, I'd be up for that."

He smiled again. "Up for that?" I chuckled. He said, "We better stop talking about Friday or I'm going to flunk this final."

"Yeah, me too."

He smiled again.

The professor stepped onto the stage. Everyone quieted down. He whispered, "Good luck."

"Good luck to you."

The exam was tough, but I thought I did well. I had an A going in. I was sure I did well enough to get an A in the class. I got up and handed in my exam. As I walked out, I glanced at Danny. He wasn't writing, but going over his exam. He smiled at me. I walked outside and wondered if I should wait for him or if that would be too weird. I always second guess myself. Fuck it if it is weird, I decided. I saw the girl he usually sat with exit the auditorium. She didn't hang around.

A couple of minutes later he stepped out. He saw me and smiled. "So," he said, "I think I did well, but there was that question on benzene and the delta H of those equations."

I opened my notebook and wrote out the compounds from memory. We walked to a bench and sat down. We talked about the problem and we both came up with the same answer. I said, "Well, if it's wrong then we both got it wrong, but I'm pretty sure that's right." I asked him about a question that I had a problem with. We both got the same answer.

"Cool," he said. "I'm feeling a lot better talking to you. I think I did well. Do you have any other exams?"

"Yeah, Bastian and I are taking a class together. Then I'm done. What about you?"

"I have a genetics final on Thursday. So, were you serious about maybe us studying together next quarter? I've been studying with a couple of girls, but they're always behind and trying to catch up so I'm done with that."

"I'm usually a week ahead," I said.

"Great. That's the way I like to do it. So, besides being up for Friday night, might you be up for us studying together."

"Yeah, for sure."

"Can I ask another favor?"

"Yeah, sure."

"Bastian told me that he told you about David and me dating. David has been wanting that to happen again. It will never happen again." He told me about the orgy being a fantasy and everything else that Bastian told me. "I guess he's hoping to use Friday night to get us back together. When I realized that, I thought about canceling."

"If you do, tell me, because I don't think I'll go," I said.

He smiled.

I quickly said, "I mean, you're the only person I know. Except for David and I'm not interested in hooking up with him."

"Well, I'm not going to cancel. But now that I know what he's up to, I'd like to not hook up with him either, which probably won't be easy. So my favor is," he hesitated, "I don't want to keep you from hooking up with anyone else, but maybe you can hang around and keep an eye on things."

"You mean keep you occupied," I said and smiled and again felt my stomach swimming.

"Or let me keep you occupied," he said and smiled.

"Sounds good to me," I said.

"I better go. I've got a paper to turn in and I'm getting wood."

I laughed. "Me, too."

I walked to the dorms, my cock throbbing in my briefs. Oh my God, I thought, he wants me to keep him occupied. Me? Keeping him occupied.

It was Wednesday, which meant that I had forty-eight hours to wait. I took out my iPhone and called Bastian. It went to voicemail. I left a message. As I entered my room, Bastian called. "How was your final?"

"Good. I sat near Danny. We talked."

"I talked to him last night in the library. I told him who you were. Did he say anything?"

"Yes, he did. He wants to study chem. with me next quarter."

"Yeah, well, that's not all he wants to do to you. I promise you."

"What? What does that mean?"

"He was thinking about canceling until I told him that you were going. He didn't make the connection until I told him you lived in the single room. He said, you mean that guy who is a gymnast? I said yes. He does yoga and swims. He said, Fuck. He's gay? He's so hot. He's really cute and has a great body."

"He didn't say that."

"Actually, what he said was that he thought you had a great smile and was really good looking. I told him that you're hung," he said and laughed. "He asked me how I knew and I told him that we jerked off together. That's all I said about anything we did."

"I'm not going to be able to study now."

"Yes, you are, because I'm on my way there. Vicki already left. I need your help and I'll help you out. We'll jerk off and then we can study."

I laughed.

He was only minutes away. We did jerk off and then we studied.